Lucifer (2015–…): Season 3, Episode 15 - High School Poppycock - full transcript

Previously, on Lucifer...

Someone is forcing
those wings on me.

I'm sure it's all a part
of God's plan.

If you mean His plan
to continually

manipulate and control
me, then agreed.

I really appreciate how
you handled the whole

"me not wanting you and
Amenadiel to bone" thing.

I do really like you.

You can't die, I know.
But I promise you,

I will find a way to end

your infinite misery
if it's the last thing I do.



Thank you for your help, mate.

No worries.
This actually gives me time

to brainstorm a little problem
of my own.

Aah!

I don't understand.
How does this not work?

You still have no idea
how to kill me.

Lucifer, I'm here.

Are you ready?

Lucifer?

Why is it so dark in here?

Wha...?

Lucifer?

Lucifer?

Detective.



There's been a change of plan.
I'm not going.

What? But we have a case.

Something's happened.
Please leave.

Wait, what's happened?
Are you okay?

I can't...

I can't make them go away.

Wha...?

Lucifer,

what's on your back?
Detective,

I said leave!

What's going on?

I can't...

I can't control them.

No! Detective!

Detective!

Detective, grab my hand!

Detective!

No!

No...

No!

And then I woke up.

And it's not the sort
of dream I'm used to.

A lot less nudity.

So what do you think
it means?

Well, I think it's
pretty obvious

what it means, Lucifer.

That I need sturdier
guardrails?

Or, maybe there's some
symbolism in there.

You mean my wings, don't you?
Yes.

Well, clearly, you have issues.

Well, you would, too,
if your father slapped

a pair on your back.

Took away your Devil face,
took away who you are.

I mean, who knows what else
He'll take from me.

Lux? My...
job with the LAPD?

Or Chloe.

Well, she may be part of it,
but this isn't about her.

This is about me.

So can we please just focus
on what truly matters here?

Which is?
Showing my Father

that He can't control me.

And He's not as powerful
as he thinks.

And how are you going
to do that?

By defying Him.

I'm gonna remove
Pierce's immortal curse

so he can finally die.

There's just
one problem, though.

Just one?

Everything
that I've come up with,

Pierce has already tried.

I'm completely out of ideas.

My well is dry,
and that is why I'm here.

Yeah, well.

Not sure I know how to remove
an immortal's curse.

No.

I need you to remove
my mental block.

Hypnotize me, or something.

I hear it works with smoking
and insomnia, so...

Unfortunately, that's not
how it works, Lucifer.

There's no easy fix
for a lack of ideas.

No?

No.

You just have
to be patient.

You never know when or where
inspiration will strike.

Well, thank you,
Doctor.

For being completely
unhelpful today.

Ah.

Hi, Amenadiel.

Ooh, ooh

Ooh.

Hey, Ella?

Um...

Uh, listen, about tonight?

I'm gonna have to...
No!

No.

You better not
be cancelling on me again.

I know,
I'm so sorry.

It's just,
I have so much work to do.

Can't you play hooky?

Not if I want to be

a responsible adult.

Right.

But...

What if...

you weren a responsible adult?

Just this once.

Come on!

Chloe,

I mean, don't you ever miss
just having stupid fun

like when you were a kid?

I was a pretty grown-up kid,
actually.

Well, never too late to start.

I know.
I'm sorry, babe, I can't.

Can we do a neon party
rain check?

Decker, one of these days,

you're gonna realize
what you've been missing.

: It looked
so cute on you.

This is the longest you've
ever gone without talking.

Ever. Is something
on your mind?

Nothing.

That's the problem.

Uh, how so?

Well, I...

I have this puzzle
that I need to solve,

but I've hit a mental block.

Okay.
Have you ever just

ran out of ideas when working
a particularly difficult case?

I mean, before I came along,
of course.

Right.

Um... not really.

I-I mean, I've hit dead ends

from lack of evidence,

but no, because there's always
a new angle to consider.

Braggart.

Our victim's name was
Kathleen Pike, 33.

She's the author
of a best-selling

futuristic Y.A. series

called Class of 3001.

She was found
with her head bashed in

by her own
vintage typewriter.

The irony's a little
on the nose.

Or on the head, should I say?

What's that white stuff?

I know what you
guys are thinking.

She's a synthetic.

Aliens. The android
who bled white.

No one
Oh, never mind.

That's melted ice cream, anyway.

It looks like our victim was
about to dig in last night

when someone showed up
and rewrote her dessert menu

with that typewriter.

Real wound's
over here though.

Huh. Who found the body?

Kathleen's editor.
Vincent Green.

He's out by the pool.

Thank you.

Uh, Daniel.

Your head is mostly empty.
Huh?

Exactly. And yet, you manage
to do this improv thing.

How do you come up with stuff
on the spot like that?

Well, the first rule of improv
is "yes, and..."

Yes and what?

That's the name
of the technique.

Right. I've heard you talk
about it before,

but I don't actually understand
what it means.

Well, you agree with whatever's
being said-- yes.

And then you say the first thing
that comes to your mind-- and.

That makes no sense.

But I'm desperate,
so I'll try anything.

Yes, and.

VINCENT: I got the call
from Kathleen late last night.

She finally finished
the new book.

We made plans for me
to come over this morning,

pick up the manuscript.

Do you usually pick up
manuscripts in person?

With Kathleen, yes.

There's only ever
one hard copy

since she does all her writing
on that typewriter.

Yes, and... well, her dying

on that typewriter as well,
it seems.

Do you know anyone who
would have done this to her?

Any known enemies?
No, Kathleen was
extremely well-liked.

She had millions
of devoted fans.

Ugh, I know how fans can get
obsessed with their idols.

Yes, and... with their boobs.

Like after you did
Hot Tub High School, Detective.

Oh. Uh-huh.
You don't think this could
be my fault, do you?

Why?
I was so excited
that she was finished

that I tweeted the news
to her fans.

I really talked the book up,
hinting at this huge

action-packed robot rebellion
ending she teased me with.

Well, as long as you didn't
tweet her address as well.

No, of course not,
but someone could find that.

Someone who wanted to
read the book first?

Yes, and... someone who wanted
to tell her

that robot rebellions couldn't
be more dull and derivative.

What is with all this
"yes, and" stuff?

Oh, just some improv thing
I was hoping

would knock me out
of my idea dry spell.

But you're literally just saying
what you would normally say,

with the words "yes, and"
in front of it.

Yes, and...
it's clearly not working.

Uh-uh.
Stupid Daniel.

Idea dry spell.

Just like Kathleen.

What do you mean?

She had the worst case of
writer's block I've ever seen.

Took her five years to figure
out how to end the series.

Well, never mind that.
How did she cure her block?

I don't know, she said I would
understand after I read it.

Said she even explained
how she broke through it

in the book's afterword.

But you haven't read it.

No, like I said,
there's only one copy

and I haven't seen it.

Detective.

This afterword
could explain how

to overcome my own form
of writer's block.

What?

We need to find it.

The killer. You mean we need
to find the killer.

Exactly. So they can
hand over that book.

Uh-huh.

Never get to bed...

Mmm. Linda, I have to say,

these last few weeks have been
absolutely incredible.

Wow.

You're really good at this
sweet, sappy stuff, aren't you?

I feel the same.

Good.

Well, maybe someday

we can actually have
this date in public?

I do hate sneaking around,
but Maze.

I know. I know.
She can't find out.

I...

I want to tell her,
I just don't know how.

I admit, I'm afraid.

Well, you should be.
Maze would...

not take this well.

I feel so guilty, I....

I've been avoiding
her calls.

Are we being cowards?

Yes.

But, Linda, it's...

Maze.
Maze. I know.

Do you know how she's doing?

I'm sure she's fine.

Busy hunting bounties and all.

But...

I can check on her if that'll
make you feel better.

Really? Just to make sure
she's okay.

Of course.

I would do anything for you.

Over my head...

What

No, I don't like my fate

Or how I'm turning out

Yeah

How I'm turning out.

"Max was plagued with confusion.

"If Jessica truly loved him,
then why'd she kiss Tristan?

"And in the back seat
of her flying car, no less."

This has sold
millions of copies.

Tongueless kissing and stealing
liquor from their parents.

I mean,
where's the sex

That robot rebellion
cannot come soon enough.

Was your high school experience
this pathetically PG?

I didn't have much of
a high school experience.

Oh! Played hooky
a lot did you?

Suddenly I like you more.

No, child actors don't have
much time for regular school.

You're either
auditioning or on set,

so it's mostly tutors.
Ah.

Maybe I did
miss out on a lot.

Anyhow, why are you
reading those?

I doubt that that's gonna
lead us to Kathleen's killer.

Oh, well, Kathleen's
afterword explained

how she overcame
her writer's block.

In order to understand,
I may need context.

Oh, in case she uses examples?

Exactly.
So, speaking of the killer,

any leads?

Yeah, actually.

Someone who goes by
the name of

"Ashley3001fan."

Got into some pretty heated
online arguments with Kathleen.

Apparently,
she wasn't too happy

the book was taking
so long to be completed.

Poor Kathleen. When will people
understand writer's block

is a very serious condition?

Well, Kathleen agreed.

"I don't have to answer
to ignorant trolls like you.

"There's a reason I'm the
writer and you're a fan.

"Maybe you should try

contributing something
to society."

Ouch, nicely put, Kathleen.

Yeah. After Kathleen
publicly berated her,

Ashley went completely offline.

You think Ashley
was so humiliated by her hero

that she wanted revenge?

It's possible.

Well, let's hope so 'cause
I need to find that boo...

Killer, the b-- killer.

I know you mean book.

I did.

Hi, Amenadiel.

Hey, Trixie.
Uh, is Maze here?

Sorry, no.

Oh.

Would you mind telling her
that I stopped by, please?

Sure.

Thanks.

Nice work, Trix.

Why don't you
want to see him?

Amenadiel's nice.

Nice?

If he were nice,

he wouldn't be sneaking around
behind my back with my friend,

and lying about it.

Why are they
doing that?

I don't know.
'Cause they suck.

Mommy says that sometimes,

people are just scared
to tell the truth.

Maybe they need a little help.

That's not a bad idea, kid.

Helping people tell the truth
is kind of my thing.

Huh.

I cybertraced
Ashley3001fan to here.

And the ice cream
from the crime scene,

also from here.

Ashley could be
one of these three.
Yes.

They do seem like
the insipid Y.A. type.

Though, scooping frozen treats
for others day in, day out,

seems even more boring.

Yeah, but they get to
hang out with their friends.

There's no
adult responsibility.

It looks like
they're having fun.

You know, stupid fun.

Since when do you
like "stupid fun"?

Hi.

Detective Decker, LAPD.
I'd like to ask you all some...

Freeze.
Ha.

"Freeze,"
good one.

Please.

Please don't call my mom.

I-It's just one joint.

Claire?
What's going on?

Claire?

You're not Ashley?

No, I'm Ashley.

Ashley's a man?

Yeah, I'm a man.

And I'm the manager.
What's going on?

Oh, what's
going on, Ashley,

is you need to
give me that book.

Otherwise, I'll show you
the true meaning of

"you scream for ice cream."

Okay?

All right.

I'm gonna
ask you nicely, Ashley.

Where's the book?

Dude, I'm telling you.
I don't have any book.

Then why was that found
at Kathleen Pike's home?

"3000 and Yum."

Yeah, that's a flavor I created
special for Kathleen.

I brought it to her house
personally.

Do you always bring ice cream
to your murder victims?

Murder?

Wait...

Kathleen's dead?

Very.

Man, she was the greatest writer
of our generation.

What?

Her books were about
high school drama.

What could a man of your age
possibly find great about them?

I mean, high school
was the best time of my life.

Reading 3001 makes me
feel like I'm 16 again.

Those books are deeper
than you think.

We know about your online fight
with Kathleen.

Things got very heated.

Must've hurt to have her
insult you like that

in front of everybody.

I never should've
said those things.

So, I sent her
some of my writing.

You know, like an olive branch.

Hold on, you're a writer?

Yeah, man.
I've written, like,

tons of Class of 3001
fan fiction.

Can't imagine that Kathleen
was too pleased.

Kathleen liked my writing.

She even asked me to help her
finish her last book.

She asked you to help?

So Kathleen's solution to
writer's block was to outsource?

Yeah, but when Kathleen
read my version,

she decided she wanted to go
in a different direction.

But she said it did help her
f-finish her book on her own.

So... boom.

It did

What exactly helped Kathleen
overcome her block?

She told me she realized

she needed to be more authentic.

You know, get back
to her original inspiration.

That is completely meaningless.

Well, well, what was
the original inspiration?

Oh

So, the characters in Kathleen's
books are based on real people.

And all of her
stories were taken

from her real life
at Westside High,

right here in L.A.

Max, Jessica, Isabel.

She didn't even change
any of the first names.

Did she have any
original ideas at all?

Well, she changed
the last names.

And she did
have to come up

with all that
futuristic sci-fi stuff.

I mean, trust me,
that is not easy.

I'm actually writing
my own book

about a forensic
scientist

who talks to ghosts.
You are? Tell me,

what do you do when
you run out of ideas?

Oh, I never run out of ideas.
I've got way too many.

My problem is how to choose.

Well, there's no need
to rub it in.

Thank you.
So, this author exposed

all these people's
dirty laundry?

Sounds like motive to me.

Uh, I think Charlotte...
uh, Ms. Richards is right.

If, uh, someone saw
the editor's tweet

announcing another book, then
maybe one of them killed her

to make sure it
didn't come out.

Ella.

The main characters
from the Class of 3001--

if the book's gonna reveal
any secrets, it's theirs.

These are our suspects.

Right. Prom king,
sexpot, cheerleader,

bad boy, valedictorian, jock.

One of these six degenerates has
my book. Let's bring them in.

No, all you have is speculation.
Not enough for arrest warrants.

I mean, even if we did
bring them all in,

we don't have any leverage.

Why would they
admit to anything?

CHLOE: Well, according
to superfan Ashley,

Kathleen was rushing to get
her book done in time

to announce it
at her high school reunion,

which is tomorrow night.

Well, if all our suspects
are in town to attend,

gave them opportunity.

Mm-hmm. And it gives us
an opportunity as well,

to go undercover.

Well, good. What are we
waiting for?
Well,

it's a high school reunion.
Everybody knows everybody.

Unless...
you're Todd Cornwell.

Who's Todd Cornwell?

Exactly. Todd Cornwell.

Class loner, acne,

Coke-bottle glasses,
whole bit.

Went to college overseas,

and when I stalked Kathleen's
classmates online,

Todd was the only one with
zero social media presence.

Lucifer, you could go as Todd.

Yeah, no, no, seriously.
Look, he looks just like you.

Has all that masturbation

finally caught up with
your eyesight, Daniel?

No one'll believe that
even if I tell them

I've had a face
and body transplant.

Yeah, but it
might be our only shot.

I mean, I could go
as your plus-one.

Oh, poops. Hold up.

Todd RSVP'd "yes."

Charlotte,
is there any legal way

to prevent him from attending?

Well, it's definitely
not legal

to distract Todd with,
say, a bounty hunter.

If anyone needs me,
I'm gonna be in my office

not hearing the plan.

Okay, great.
Are you gonna call Maze?

Gladly, whilst you
research our suspects.

Enjoy.

Maze.

I'm so glad you're here.

Yeah, well,
you seem pretty busy.

I called a couple of times.
Never heard back.

Yeah, I know, work's been crazy.

Oh. I was hoping that maybe
you found a boyfriend.

Boyfriend?
Yeah.

Why would I...

Definitely no boyfriend.

Really?
Yup.

So single. So... so single.

Well, in that case,
I should totally set you up.

I have just the guy.

Oh, that it so thoughtful
of you, Maze,

but you really don't
have to do that.

Please, Linda, I want to.
What are best friends for?

I know, it's just me
and blind dates...

How about tomorrow night?
Tomorrow night?

Mm.

Oh... shoot. I think I'm busy.

Let me do this.

Tomorrow it is.

No.

Mom?

Baby, what are you doing up?
Get back in bed.

Bed? It's morning.

I'm gonna miss the bus.

What?

I've-I've, uh...

I've been up all night?

Come on, come on.
Get the...

Get-get, go, get your...
Where's the...?

Tell me, did you fall
from a shooting star?

One without a permanent scar

And did you miss me

While you were looking
for yourself out there?

Oh.

Wow.

You know, high school reunion's
a very popular torture in Hell.

This is beautiful.

I... you know, you didn't
even try to look like Todd.

Well... well, why
would I do that?

If I was Todd, I'd
want to look like me.

Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh, look.

It's Emily and Bo,

Tristan and Jessica,

and there's Max talking
to Isabel.

She is so not
good enough for him, really.

What did you just say?

Max and Isabel,
two of our suspects.

Oh, oh!

The prom king
and the sexpot.

Oh, Lucifer, don't judge.

They're so much more
to these people

than their stereotypes suggest.

Right.

It's just, ugh.

Are you being serious?

Yeah. Yeah, the books
are much deeper

than you'd imagine.

The characters, they're so
compelling and relatable

and rich, and I-I mean...

They're all here.

And one of them
is most likely a killer.

Right.

Right.
Right.

Okay, I'm gonna go
sign us in

so that we can
finally meet the, um...

so we can
question the suspects.

What is happening?

Okay, so we each have
three people to question.

Let's figure out
who was worried about

Kathleen's book coming out.

Yes, and where everyone was
the night of the murder.

Oh, yeah.

Are you even listening to me?

Mm-hmm.

Do you know, I can't believe
I'm saying this,

but focus, Detective.

I need that afterword.

Right, sorry.
Right.

Oh, my God.
What?

It's Jessica.

Can you believe

that sophomore year,
she hooked up with Tristan

on the laserball field?

Don't worry,
Jessica's on my list.

Okay, so,
I'm the first one here.

I'll just go have a drink
at the bar.

HOSTESS:
Sure thing.
Linda.

Amenadiel,
what are you doing here?

Well, Maze invited me.

I thought she wanted to talk
after I stopped by yesterday.

Maze is setting me up
on a blind date.

What if you are my blind date?

Well, that doesn't make
any sense.

Unless she knows about us
and is trying to make us squirm.

And torture
is her thing.

Linda,

this is Todd.

Your date.

Hello.

This is a blue lobelia.

Native Americans used them
to treat constipation.

Thank you.

But what are you two doing here?

Double date.

Isn't this great?

Hmm.

Yeah, uh, no...

Hi.

That's great.

Excuse us. Isabel.

Todd?

Odd

Are...

I'm sorry. You...

just look so different.

I'll take that as a compliment.

Wow, I...

Do you have a British accent?

Well, I've had many accents
over the years,

but this one is clearly
the best.

You're so funny and... so hot.

I know.
Mmm.

Uh, but I need
to ask you a few questions.

Sure. Let's catch up.

Can you believe Kathleen's
coming out with another book?

Oh, I believe it.

That bitch loved
profiting off of us.

Ugh, she sucks.

But honestly, we're all, uh,
just trying to move on.

Man, those books ruined
our lives.

I had to move to Maine.

Do you know
what was in her last book?

What sparked her final idea?

The books
are about you, correct?

And I ain't goin' nowhere...

Oh, for...
So, do you know

what happens in the new book?

Are there any big secrets
that come out or...

Does Isabel actually
get pregnant?

Uh, who are you again?

What were you doing
two nights ago?

I was... at home?

Doing a facial.

I was with Tristan.

I think.

I mean, by the time I flew in,
it was really late.

You're hiding something.

And I think I know what.

It's because
you were with Bo,

and you didn't want Isabel
to find out.

But, like, who cares
what Isabel thinks?

Especially after what she did
to you in chemistry class?

I mean, do you realize you're
still lucky to have your hand?

It doesn't matter
where I was two nights ago.

What matters is that tonight,
we're together.

So where were you
two nights ago?

That's hard to find...

Let's go talk somewhere
a little quieter.

Right.

Yeah, talk. Uh-huh.

You two have so
much in common.

Yeah.

Linda, you're a therapist.

And, Todd,

you're in therapy.

Discuss.

Oh.

You don't have to...
I wet the bed.

It's more common
than people think.

You're lovely.

I'm so glad she convinced me
to skip my reunion for this.

Most serial killers wet the bed.

I smell a love
connection, don't you?

Let's crank this
date up a notch.

Waiter.

Linda.

This is getting out of control.

We just have to get through
tonight. We can do it.

So, Todd.

Any hobbies?

I make my own toothpaste.

Where were you two nights ago?

Uh...

Come on, Tristan.

I can't remember.

Well, try.

I told you, man,

I don't, I don't remember
where I was.

Oh!

Tell me the truth now.

Okay.
A couple nights ago,

we all broke into
the school pool.

You know, just a little party
before the party, you know?

Well, why is that a secret?

Because we didn't
invite everyone.

Well, you, for instance.

What?
I'm sorry, man.

If we knew how cool
you had gotten,

we totally would've
invited you.

So what you're saying is
you all have the same alibi?

Wasting our time here.

Where's the detective?

MAX:
I dig you, Chloe.

You...
you're different.

Too bad you didn't go
to high school with us.

Yeah.

That would have been great.

Yeah.

So, you were gonna tell me

where you were two nights ago?

Is that really what you want
to talk about, hmm?

Well, I mean,

I would really like to know.

Max!

What are you doing

Uh...
We were talking.

And what do you care?

You cheated on Max
with Tristan.

That was 15 years ago.

Actually, I am still
kind of pissed...
Right.

...about that.
I'm sorry
I cheated on you,

but I only did it because
I thought you slept with Emily.

I would never
cheat on you, Jessica.

I know that now.

I read 3001.

It showed me how much
you really loved me.

Hmm.

You know,
sometimes I think about

getting back together.

Mmm.

Me, too.

Oh.

What's
going on here?

Max, I thought it
was gonna be just us.

I'm not really down
for a four-way.

Make that five.

I can't believe I'm saying this,
but I'm not down, either.

Oh. So you were sleeping
with Emily...
Oh.

...weren't you? And then you
bring this rando in here, too?

I'm not a "rando."
I-I just met

this rando.
We are never...

Hey.
...getting back together.

You didn't tell her about us?
MAX: Jessica, I--

this rando...
Us?
Yes, us.

That's what you said.
I never said...

Oh, really, Max?
...anything like that to you.

Detective! None of these people
killed Kathleen.

What?
"Killed"?

EMILY: What?
"Detective"?

I have discovered
that they all

have the same alibi.

They broke onto
the campus two nights ago

and had a party
by the pool.

Didn't you

So, Kathleen's killer, not here.

Look at me,
being the responsible one.

So that's why you were
all acting so strangely.

Yeah.

Sorry we didn't invite
you, Todd, but, uh...

you're not mad, right?

You were hanging out
with Kathleen anyway.

What?

Todd was hanging out

with Kathleen two nights ago?

Yeah, it's what he said
in the e-mail.

I did? I...

What? He was an
awesome math tutor,

and now he helps me
with my taxes.

Detective.

I think I'm the killer.

Apparently, Maze took Todd
to a steakhouse in Hollywood.

It is an odd place
for a kidnapping, even for Maze.

And what motive would Todd have
to kill Kathleen?

He's not even in the books.

Well, exactly.

Odd-bod Todd's probably tired
of being left out.

Oh, right, should have
thought of that.

Yes, you should have,

but someone was making the case
all about themselves.

Slightly unprofessional,
but I forgive you, Detective.

I know. I can't believe
I let myself

get so wrapped up
in all of that.

Think I was just trying
to make up

for all the fun, teenage drama
that I missed out on, you know?

I didn't even get to go
to my own prom.

It's ridiculous, I know.

No, it's not.

And that's the best way
to clean out an abscessed tooth.

How delightful.

I am so glad we did this.

I have missed you guys.

I mean...

what's not
to miss, right?

Mmm.

Mmm.
Okay, stop.

Uh,
that's inappropriate.

We're in a restaurant, Maze.

Who cares?

I care. I mean, I'm just...

it ju-- it just makes me
uncomfortable.

Oh, it does?

Well, does this make you
uncomfortable, too?

Maze!

Maze! Why are you
acting like this?

Because she knows.

You know, don't you?

And you're torturing us.

That is so incredibly mean.

I'm the one who's mean?

You're the ones who've been
running around,

lying to me about this fling
for weeks.

Of course we lied, Maze.
Look at you.

You have a tendency
to overreact.

I do not...

overreact.
Maze.

Can we just calm down here?
No!

No.

I will not take orders from
some pathetic daddy's boy.

Tell me,
Amenadiel.

Is this the divine purpose
your Father sent you here for?

So you can bang

some... selfish human?

Selfish

All I do
is listen to your problems!

Everyone's problems!

So, yeah, for once,
I put myself first

and did what makes me happy.

So, sue me. Or torture me.
Or better yet,

why don't you just skewer me
with one of your knives?

But before you do,

know that this wasn't
some fling,

that what Amenadiel
and I found

was completely unexpected,

but 100% real.

But you were my friend.

Maze?

LAPD, drop
the weapons.

Yes, I indeed visited Kathleen
two nights ago.

The night she was murdered.

Kathleen was murdered?

Oh, my.

And y-you think I did it.

Of course you do.

The weirdo.

The outcast.

I'm used to people
judging this book by its cover.

That's why I swore off
social media.

I still don't even know
how Kathleen tracked me down.

Kathleen tracked you down?

She wanted to discuss

the final installment
of her series with me.

Well, why would she talk
about that with you?

You're not even
in the books.

Yeah. I was surprised, too.

Turns out, not only was
she going to include me

in the final book,

she was making me the hero.

Wait, h-hold on, does that mean
she let you read the book?

Uh, no.

She didn't want me
to read it yet.

Kathleen was waiting
for the reunion.

She was excited
about finishing it in time

to show everyone there.

So you have no idea
what's in the afterword?

The afterword? No.

But she did tell me
about the story itself.

How it had

a peaceful, grounded ending.

No scandals,
no insiders versus outcasts.

Just...

people finally understanding
each other.

The way
she described it, it...

...it sounded beautiful.

And boring.
And not at all like

the action-packed robot ending

that the editor told us about.

I smell a new theory brewing.

I got to go make a phone call.

Mr. Green.

Hi, uh,
Detective Decker, LAPD.

Detective, how can I help you?

Um, I was just wondering,
did Kathleen ever talk to you

about working
with a ghostwriter?

A ghostwriter? No, wish she had.

Maybe she would have finished
the book sooner.

Oh, I see.

So-so, she never mentioned
a-a fan-fic writer

named Ashley Collins?

He's a-a manager
at an ice cream shop.

I think the name's
Scoop Science.

Actually, yeah,
Kathleen did mention some sort

of overeager fan who invented
some special flavor for her.

Kind of creeped her out.

Wh

Is this Ashley a suspect?

Oh, well, I can't divulge any of
that information at this time.

But you've been
incredibly helpful, Mr. Green.

Thank you.

You in the mood
for some ice cream?

Hello, Vincent.

Looking for Ashley?
Sorry to disappoint.

What are you doing here?
CHLOE: Drop the gun.

You're under arrest
for the murder of Kathleen Pike.

You lied to us, Vincent.

I called Ashley.
He confirmed

that the robot ending was
his version and not Kathleen's.

Th-That means nothing.
But it is suspicious.

So I looked at traffic footage.

You went to Kathleen's house
the night of the murder.

But, Detective, didn't
he tell us he didn't go

over there
till the next morning?

Fine. Yes,
I was at Kathleen's that night.

If you had waited five years
for that damn book like I did,

you wouldn't want to wait
another second for it either.

But once you got it,
you didn't like what you read,

did you?
I was horrified.

She ended the series
in the most boring way possible.

And you were worried
about the sales.

We'd lose millions

without the right ending.
Ashley's.

So you and Kathleen argued
over which one to use.

She refused to use
the good version.

So, yeah, I threw
her stupid typewriter at her.

But even with Kathleen gone,
you knew

that you couldn't publish
Ashley's ending as hers.

So you came here
to tie up the one loose end.

Now, tell me, Vincent--

Kathleen's manuscript,

where is it?

I don't have it.

I destroyed it.

You did what?

I couldn't let anybody read
that pathetic joke of an ending!

But I needed to read
the afterword

so I could fix my problem,

and now you're saying
it's gone?!
CHLOE: Lucifer,

back off.

What did it say?

The afterword?
Yes!

How did she fix her block?

I don't know!
She said inspiration came

when she realized
she couldn't go back

and change what she'd done.

Well, that doesn't
help me at all!

Lucifer, stop!

Now I'm never gonna
figure out how to...

Are you okay?

No, Detective.

Far from it.

Remind me to never go on
another blind date ever again.

Mm-mm. Oh, I don't know,

I thought you and Todd
really made a connection.

Okay, so I've been thinking.

Yeah.
A lot.

Tie you up, not enough...

Pretty crazy what Maze did.

I'll say.

But she was right.

We never should have lied
to her.

And I never should have lied
to myself.

Yourself?

What do you mean?

As much as I tried
to tell myself otherwise,

I knew what we were doing
was going to hurt her.

And I did it anyway.

That's how much I wanted
to be with you, Amenadiel.

Look, you've made me happier
than I've been

in a long, long time.

But...

I was being selfish.

Maze is my friend.

I'll be your warmth here...

I can't be with you anymore.

I'll be your back...

Not when it does this to her.

I put you in the corner...

You know, it's not fair for her
to take this away from us.

I know. I don't expect you
to understand.

Please, baby...

But I don't want to be
that kind of person.

It's just not who I am.

I'll be your warmth here...

Actually, I do understand.

Um...

I may have strayed
from who I am as well.

I'm holding your bag
for you...

Please, baby,
back for bad love

So I guess this is it.

I guess so.

How can I wait?

Holding your bag for you.

Lucifer!

I'm here. You wanted to see me?

Yes, I wanted to check on you.

That you were back to being
the good detective.

"The good detective"?

Mm. Well, I like
our partnership much better

when you do all the work and
I'm the fun, irresponsible one.

Oh. Yeah.

I did get a little carried
away at that reunion.
Hmm.

Just a smidge.

Y-You know,
it made me realize something.

All of that high school
drama that I missed out on--

the-the girly gossip,

the hallway crushes,

all those school dances--

that's just not who I am. I...

I like being
the responsible adult.

Right.

So you no longer desire any
of that high school poppycock?

No.

Well then...

I guess
you won't be wanting this.

Detective...

...will you go to the prom
with me?

I can't believe you did this.

Looking from a window above

It's like a story of love

Can you hear me?

Came back only yesterday

I'm moving farther away

Want you near me

All I needed...

Thank you, Lucifer.

You gave

All I needed
for another day...

I'm just glad you got
what you needed.

And all I ever knew

But you, you never found
that inspiration

that you were looking for.

Are you ever gonna tell me what
it is you were trying to solve?

Uh, it's-it's complicated.

Well, tell me anyhow?

Very well.

A long time ago,

dear old Dad put a curse on a...

well, a friend of mine.

And I want to break that curse,

show my Father He's not
as powerful as He thinks,

that He can't control him.

Or me.

Well, crazy metaphor aside,

can I offer some advice?

Oh...
please.

If I've learned anything
from this experience,

it's that it's better
to move forward

than stay stuck in the past.

It's just like Kathleen
realized.

We can't rewrite history.

You can't.

But maybe I can.

Detective, you're a genius.

Thanks?

You've just given me my idea.

All I need to do is go back

and undo the reason it exists
in the first place.

Oh.

Thank you.

You gave

All I needed for another day

And all I ever knew

Only you.