Lucifer (2015–…): Season 1, Episode 11 - St. Lucifer - full transcript

Previously on Lucifer...

- You slept with my...
- Whoa!

I know you had Boris
killed. And John Decker.

Aw, such a shame

- there's no evidence, right?
- You see, the Russians,

they don't like it when one
of their own is taken out

without permission.

I didn't think you had it in you.

I'm impressed.

You want Perry to go to jail,

call Lucifer a liar.



"A liar"?

Lucifer is not a liar.

He is the...

best partner I have ever had.

And I can only hope
that he can count on me

as much as I count on him.

Your Father put her here.

In Lucifer's path.

It means Chloe's not an obstacle.

She's how we'll get it all back.

Detective...

what you said today in the courtroom...

It was the truth.

I, um...



What?

Well, I-I got you burgers and
fries but I forgot the ketchup.

I hate ketchup.

Foolish condiment.

Lucifer!

Hello!

This is your flight attendant speaking.

Please buckle up.

Jana?

I didn't know you
were expecting company.

I wasn't. I...

Surprise layover in L.A.,

I thought we could rack up some miles.

She's welcome to join, if she's game.

Excuse me.

Wait. No... Detective.

I had no idea that Jana was coming over.

It's okay. I'll let you two catch up.

Detective, please! Come on.

I mean, we were... we
were having a moment.

Don't be angry.

I'm not angry.

I'm... glad she showed up.

- You are?
- Yeah.

She just kept me from
making a big mistake.

Detective!

I... Jana...

Wheels up, Captain?

I'm afraid this flight's grounded.

As long as you are mine.

As long as you are mine.

As long as you are mine.

You want some juice
with your eggs, honey?

- I don't like eggs.
- What?

Since when don't you like eggs?

They're a wondrously
scrumptious start to your day.

Give me that.

Who got you this? Maze?

They're my favorite.

Please, please, Mommy?

Honey...

Okay. But only because
I missed story time.

Were you working last night?

No.

I had a little dinner.

With who?

Lucifer.

So if you weren't working,

was it, like, a date?

With flowers and candles
and songs about naked stuff?

No! Definitely no.

It wasn't a... it wasn't
a date. It-it really wasn't.

Then why are your cheeks
getting red, Mommy?

My cheeks aren't getting red...

Check it out.

Yeah. I had no idea
you were so concerned

about L.A.'s water shortages.

- What? No.
- Yeah.

Wrong side.

Someone got his ass.

Yeah.

Monkey, go get your backpack.

I'm good. I'll stay here.

Yeah. Someone told me he
died this morning. I heard.

Wait, why aren't you happy?

Your father's killer
finally got what he deserved.

What Perry Smith deserved
was to rot in jail

for the rest of his life.

But still.

Pretty awesome that
someone took him out, right?

I bet it hurt.

A lot.

Whoever did this is
no better than he was.

Save yourself.

Last night.

You didn't look at me this way.

Ooh...

Lucifer.

There's something very
important we need to discuss.

New visitors policy. Hot
women turning up unannounced

are no longer welcome.

Especially those who
are secretly my mother.

Well, I think you'll make an exception

when you hear what I have to say.

Well, spit it out. I don't
have an eternity here.

Yes. Actually, I do.

I just want you gone.

It's about Chloe.

What have you done this time?

Son, I don't know how to tell you this.

What is it, Mum?

I...

was wrong.

I wanted to prove to you

that Chloe wasn't worthy of you.

I gave her every
incentive to turn on you.

But she didn't.

She impressed me.

I'm starting to understand
what you see in her.

But, regardless, it's a moot point.

Why's that?

Because what you couldn't
destroy, I did all on my own.

Look, just call it a case
of stewardess interruptus.

Perhaps it was for the best.

I know you don't believe that.

I don't know

what happened between you two.

But I do know that Chloe
proved herself to you.

Maybe now it's your turn.

Maybe now it's time that
you prove yourself to her.

You don't have

to prove anything to me.

Well, normally, I would
agree with you. But you insist

on letting an impossibly
attractive flight attendant

come between us. And not in the fun way.

Lucifer, we are very different people

with very different personalities,

and I'm not judging.

I'm a homicide detective,
not the slut police.

And I mean you, not her.

Nothing happened after you left.

Not my business if it did.

No. But what I'm saying
is things have changed now,

since we had our moment.

We didn't have a moment.

Yes we did. And I can assure you.

Detective, I will never lay eyes
on that flight attendant again.

You sure about that?

No. Jana.

Always with the tragic timing.

Doesn't seem to be a mugging.
Cash, credit card, keys,

all still here.

- Can you look for her phone?
- Yes.

Thanks.

I'm sorry about your friend.

I don't think I deserve the term.

We hardly knew each other, really.

So a woman showed up
to your house for sex

and you barely knew her? Of
course that's what happened.

Guilty as charged.

You want to tell me
what happened last night?

Jana left five minutes
after you did. Alive.

I believe you, but can anyone
else confirm your story?

Well, I was with 300 of my
closest strangers in Lux.

I went to the bar right after she left.

Well, what about the five
minutes before she left?

Are you jealous, Detective?

No. I'm just trying to
piece together a timeline.

A lot can happen in five minutes.

You can't be suggesting...

That you slept with her? I'm not.

No. That I'm a two-pump chump.

If we'd slept together,
she wouldn't have left

until the morning. Believe me.

Maybe she'd still be alive.

Okay, what else can
you tell me about Jana?

I need to put together a victim profile.

Well, I mean, she gave incredible...

And I'm not talking
about her sexual skills.

- Right.
- Maybe her last name,

friends, family, where she was
staying when she was in L.A.?

I'm a lover, not a Rolodex.

Detective.

Found it in the tunnel.

Thank you.

All threatening texts.

All sent from the same number.

This last one, just before
she got to your place.

"Ditch the loser from Lux"?

This is terrible. She was
seeing someone else at Lux?

I think it means you.

The number on Jana's cell

belongs to a wealthy Silicon
Valley guy, Andy Kleinberg.

We tracked his phone's GPS

to some swanky Malibu beach house.

I'll send you the address, Chloe.

What the hell are you doing here?

You see this?

We're basically famous.

Are you nuts?

You brag about what we
did in a police precinct?

Dude. Chill.

- I was coming to get my check.
- Yeah.

And I thought

that we could,
celebrate our righteous kill.

We didn't kill anyone, okay?

We just...

We gave karmic justice a little nudge.

Is that what we're
calling the Russian mob now?

Shh!

Come on!

Let's grab some vodka,
we'll make it a theme.

Maze, we're not having a drink.

We shouldn't even be seen together

until all this blows
over. Do you get it?

Trying to blend in?

Well, it's not often I
get to break out the linen.

Speaking of style, I've got
to get one of these for Lux.

Yeah, that would really
tie the place together.

- Look, for the last time...
- Hey, Lucifer.

Yes. Hello. For the
last time, Detective,

nothing happened with
Jana after you left.

I believe you.

- It just doesn't...
- Hey, Lucifer.

Change anything.

Well, why not?

Well, look at this party.

I bet this is your your
definition of fun, isn't it?

Well, I mean, I prefer scotch in
a lowball to sex on the beach...

and the drink, I mean.
But dealer's choice.

Okay, well, fun for me

is being home with
Trixie, reading her a book.

Really?

Yeah.

And that's okay, but we're different.

Like, too different.

Well, as a wise man once said,

"opposites attract."

I believe that was an animated cat

in a music video.

- A wise animated cat.
- Excuse me.

Hi. I am looking for Andy Kleinberg.

Do you know where he is?

Don't waste your time with him.

Let me get you a drink.

Keep it in your pants, Tommy Bahama.

She's spoken for, thank you.

No, I'm not.

So do you know where Andy is?

Your loss.

Thank you.

Andy Kleinberg?

You're blocking my view.

The view from a jail cell sucks, too.

What, is this a joke?

Wait, is this one of George's pranks

to get me back for that stripper?

Hey, are you a stripper?

I'd recommend you stop talking now.

Jana Lawrence was found
murdered this morning.

She was my stewardess on
my flight yesterday. So?

So you sent her a threatening text.

"Ditch the loser from Lux."

Yeah.

She said she was hooking up

with some DJ named Lucifer.

DJ? How dare you!

"Meet me now, or else"?

Yeah, or else this is shut off. No mas.

Look, I sent that text

to, like, 25 girls last night.

It's called a "booty
call." You ever have one?

Of course not. Booties call me.

Sometimes.

Look, is there anyone who can prove

you not having sex?

I had sex.

Meet Sharon.

Hey, Lucifer.

Yeah.

She can attest to my whereabouts

all night long.

And she can, too.

Now... if you'll excuse me,

I'd like to go somewhere
where you two are not.

- Charming.
- You know...

you and him have a lot in common.

We are nothing alike.

Really? Right.

Well, that is clearly off the rack.

Inferior linen.

Not remotely the same.

Regardless, I don't
think he's our killer.

Let's go talk to your friend Sharon.

See if his alibi checks out.

She's not my friend. She's
just a woman that I...

No, actually, that's worse.

Right, where to, then?

There's been another murder.

Ballistics match our flight attendant.

The victim was in the
shower when he was killed.

Signs of a struggle. Looks
like he was tortured, too.

So Jana's killer had it in

for this poor chap as well, did they?

On the upside, looks like he didn't have

anything to do with this case after all.

Pretty sure you didn't
sleep with this guy.

Actually, you're wrong
about that, Detective.

Raj. So fit.

This isn't good.

What, that a man was one of my lovers?

Come now, Detective,
it's the 21st century.

It's not that,

it's that you slept with both victims.

We've been trying to find a connection

between the two, and so far

all we have is you.

Well, I wish I could help you.

What, you didn't get details
between the sweet nothings?

Quite a few, actually.

But they were mostly
about what he desired,

which I doubt you want to hear.

What if this whole
thing is about desire?

You've been with a lot of people.

What if one of them got jealous

and wanted you all to themselves?

What, you think one of my exes is

killing off the others?

Look, I've seen what
your exes are capable of.

Charlotte Richards, to name one.

Bloody hell, for the last time,

she is not an ex.

Either way, we should warn them

that they could be in trouble.

While Dan's looking
into other connections

between our victims, we should talk to

anyone you've slept with.

That's a brilliant plan.

It is?

Well, what better way
to prove my word to you

than a bevy of exes singing my praises?

Sure.

That's definitely what's gonna happen.

- Yeah.
- Okay,

a list of everyone you've slept with

in the last eight weeks.

Right, you'll need a
much bigger notepad.

One, two, three, unh!

Hot pants.

Hey, hot pants.

Unh, no, hey.

Ha.

Hot pants.

Hey, hot pants.

Smokin'

Girl over there.

With the hot pants on.

Filthy MacNasty.

All night long.

Get down...

Wow.

You slept with all of them?

Yes. Bit of a dry spell
the last couple of months.

This is a waste of time.

I refuse to believe that
one of my former lovers

would kill another.

Yeah, well, so far we don't have

any other connections.

And people will go to crazy lengths

for the ones they love,
even if they're the ones

who suggested the split...

and still have feelings,
even though they shouldn't.

What on earth are you talking about?

Did I just say that out loud?

- Yes.
- Never mind.

Right.

It was an amazing,

amazing night.

But the next day, Lucifer was with

another woman, so did
that make you jealous?

Jealous? Why?

Well, because he basically

used you for sex and moved on.

- Did that bother you?
- I knew what I was in for.

And what were you in for?

The best night of my life.

The best night of my life.

The best night of my life.

The best night of my life.

The best night of my life.

You know, this is actually feeling

a bit masturbatory, even for me.

Though clearly not
the words of a killer.

He knew exactly what I wanted.

And he did this thing...

He did this thing...

He even did this thing with a Pan flute

and a butternut squash...

I was improvising.

I didn't have any zucchinis.

He did this thing with
my Tibetan singing pot

and artisan honey.

It's a game I play called,

"Do I make you horny, honey?"

with some Vaseline and a car battery.

- What?
- That was a move I call,

"Gentlemen, start your engines."

It's bloody brilliant.

Did you and Lucifer have
any intimate moments?

Obviously, we were intimate.

We were hella intimate.!

Did you not hear about
the honey? I mean...

We're talking about,
um, emotional intimacy.

Like, um...

did Lucifer, bring you dinner?

Or did he

do anything special for you?

Get you a burger, fries?

What? No.

Look, it was a rad night.

And morning...

and afternoon...

But... that's all.

I mean, I certainly wouldn't
hurt anyone over him.

- What?
- No.

There was no reason to hurt anyone.

I mean, he was just a meaningless

one-night-stand.

- It was just about sex.
- It's just sex.

It's just sex.

There was no emotional connection.

That was it, it was fun,

but completely meaningless.

- Just fun...
- but meaningless.

- Meaningless.
- It meant nothing. Nada.

I never saw him again.

See where I'm going with this?

Well, look, man, the good news is...

none of them has
motive to be the killer.

Yes. Because none of
them cared enough about me

to murder.

Thanks for calling me in.

I actually wanted to speak with you.

Wait a minute, why is she here?

I don't know. I keep telling
the detective she's not my ex.

I wanted to tell you that

you impressed me.

Really?

Yeah.

I underestimated you.

I gave you all the reason in the world

to betray Lucifer.

You did. During that case

you went to incredible lengths

to hurt Lucifer.

I did nothing of the sort.

You took that case
just to try and get me

to call Lucifer a liar in court.

True, but I would never hurt Lucifer.

I was trying to prove

that you weren't worthy of him.

I see. What about the other women

that you don't think are worthy of him?

What'd you do to them?

Nothing.

They are inconsequential.

You're different.

He's different when he's with you.

Does that threaten you?

Perhaps at first.

Not anymore.

It makes me happy.

I'm glad he found someone.

He deserves a woman
like you in his life.

Have you slept with him yet?

What?

See?

You're different.

Where were you the night of the 27th?

Hey, listen, man,
you're not gonna...

You're not gonna tell Chloe about

me and Charlotte, right?

Well, as long as you promise to never

touch Charlotte again.

No, it's not a problem.

Good. 'Cause the last
thing I need is a step-Dan.

You say some really weird things, man.

You ever do something
awesome for somebody,

and they just don't care?

I'm a therapist.

Being taken for granted
is in the job description.

Like, for example, when a friend

uses your lunch break for free therapy,

and doesn't say thank you.

You want me to take care
of this friend of yours?

Yea... It's fine.

So how do you deal with it?

I just realize that
self-worth comes from within.

You can't rely on others

to validate you.

I don't care what anyone thinks of me.

Of course you do, we all do.

You know, and that's okay.

That's human.

I'm a demon.

I actually think you're more human

than a lot of people I know.

Take that back.

Okay, okay, you're a good friend

and a great pers...

Demon.

You just need to
realize it for yourself.

Not because I said it.

You're saying I'm awesome.

I'm saying that you need
to say that you're awesome.

Believe that you're awesome.

Yes, you're awesome.

Hell yeah I am.

Thanks, Doc.

Do you notice anything

out of the ordinary?

Did anyone threaten you?

I mean, there was that one girl.

What girl?

The creepy weirdo.

She was always in a corner of the club.

She just gave this death stare.

Daggers.

Okay, can you give me a description?

Well, I can describe her aura.

That's okay.

Her name is Suki Price.

A number of your exes confirmed
seeing her lurking around Lux,

so we ran her description
through the DMV.

Are you sure you don't recognize her?

No, which is strange, 'cause I remember

the face of everyone I've been with.

Maybe she's mask girl.

Halloween?

What? No. President's Day.

Or maybe, I don't remember

'cause it was just another
meaningless encounter.

This case not the trip down
memory lane you were hoping for?

It's almost enough to make a man

question the way he's lived his life.

Almost.

Well, luckily this girl gives me hope.

At least one of my former lovers
might be willing to kill for me.

It's open.

LAPD. Anyone home?

Well, this isn't creepy at all.

See? I told you someone cared.

Look at this.

Multiple chest hair options. Amazing.

I can make a lasting impression.

Yeah, on someone with serious issues.

This woman is clearly deranged,

dangerous, and...

Why am I on this wall?

Well, maybe she can just
sense the inevitable.

Suki Price? LAPD.

What're you doing in my...

Lucifer!

- Okay, hey, hey.
- What...

Hey, come out with your hands up.

This is one of your exes?

Do you know, I'm really not sure...

I... darling, could you do this?

And say, "I am not a crook."

No, it's definitely
not Sexy Richard Nixon.

I'm quite certain we've
not slept together.

Well, I could have told you that.

Care to explain the wall?

I'm just...

really into Lucifer.

And who could blame you.

You're my perfect man.

Like porn and stuffed crust pizza

and my Hello Kitty blankie
all rolled into one.

I've loved you from afar.

Right.

I see what's happened here.

Not having sex with me
drove her into a murderous,

psychotic rage.

Murder?

What are you talking about?

We're investigating the
deaths of Jana Lawrence

and Raj Daniere. Have you heard of 'em?

I have all of Lucifer's
lovers categorized.

Here is the flight attendant section.

Here's Jana with Raj.

So the two of them knew each other?

Raj is Jana's GBFFN.

Was her GBFFN.

A gay best friend for now.

She sometimes crashed on his
couch whenever she was in L.A.

And w-what are
these numbers about here?

Date from two days ago.

The last time Lucifer and Jana

hooked up.

Right. Much as I admire

your dedication to this
creepy stalker business,

I have to correct you,
there was no hookup.

But I made a commemorative doll.

You're wearing your new suit.

Yes, what excellent
detail on the French cuffs.

That's what I was doing last night.

You can ask the pizza delivery man.

He helped me with these

teeny tiny buttons.

Ask him.

Who's the third person in this photo?

That's a pilot Jana works with.

Those three hang out
together all the time.

Maybe he knows what happened.

Yeah, yeah, I got it.

Look, I'm gonna send an officer by

to get a full statement from you.

Do not leave town.

And abandon Lucifer?

Never.

Right, good-bye.

I've been stung.

All this chemistry.

Has got me falling.

Italian beans.

And you want me to try this because...?

This "espresso" concoction
is my favorite thing

about humanity so far.

Well, besides sex, but...

You're looking well these days.

So confident, so cheery.

I almost didn't recognize you.

Thanks to you, Mom. You
found a way to get us home.

But...

manipulating Lucifer and
Chloe toward each other

for our own gain...

Your Father is the one
that started all of this.

We are simply bringing it to an end.

On our terms.

I've tried to manipulate Lucifer before.

It didn't end well.

That's because you lied to him.

Lucifer respects the truth.

So use that to get us all home.

And then, we can put
all of this behind us.

This is delicious.

Still not as good as sex.

Mom!

Please.

Our pilot's name is Tim Pickman.

Drugs and assault.

Used to work for a big airline,

now he flies rich dudes on small jets.

His recent routes are...

The Caribbean, Mexico City, Ahmedabad.

Yes, all hotspots for drug smugglers.

O-Or so I'm told.

Working for a private airline
would be the perfect cover.

You have quick travel,
lax customs agents...

And if Pickman was smuggling drugs,

maybe Jana and Raj found out about it,

threatened to squeal, so
he shut 'em up permanently.

Yes, murder's handy that way.

Okay, where do we find him?

Let's see.

FAA reports he filed a
last-minute flight plan.

Flying Van Nuys to Caracas,
takes off in less than an hour.

Okay, we got to get to the airport.

Fast.

Copy that.

Lucifer!

What are you thinking?!

Well, I'm pondering Stalker Girl.

I mean, how is it the only
person infatuated with me

is someone who doesn't even know me?

No, the driving!

You're gonna get us killed!

No, I'm gonna catch
our killer, Detective.

Better hold on!

Hey.

Better hold on.

Lucifer!

You're welcome.

Captain Pickman, LAPD!

Thank God!

You're a cop.

I was afraid you were trying to kill me.

What?

So, care to explain why you
were trying to flee the country?

My two closest friends
just got murdered.

I thought I might be next

and I was not about to
stick around to find out.

Who would try to kill you, Tim?

I only know him as "Burt."

Guy smuggles a lot of
drugs into the country.

So, were you moving product for him?

No,

he uses young women like Jana to mule.

He recruits 'em on the
party circuit in Malibu,

offers them cash,

free travel, whatever they desire.

Right.

And what is it you desire, Tim?

I want to build a cat sanctuary.

Wait. For goodness sake.

Cat?

I got into trouble
using drugs years back.

My life fell apart.

- But then I adopted Twinkle...
- Right,

skip along, Tim, 'cause
no one really wants to hear

about your feline meet cute.

Jana tried to get me to smuggle

for Burt, too,

but I refused.

Then why were you running?

On Jana's last flight,
a package went missing.

A package?

So, what, Burt thought Jana stole it?

And when she didn't have
it, he went after Raj.

And now, me.

Is there any way to
get a hold of this guy?

I got a bull's-eye

painted on my back.

Why the hell would I want to?

Detective...

in order to lure out our
murderous kingpin from hiding,

all we need to do is
for someone to pretend

to have this mysterious package.

Yes, and it would need to be someone

who might have worked with Jana.

Tim, who else was on the flight?

Just me,

Andy Kleinberg, my copilot,

and a new flight attendant.

A new flight attendant?

So Burt may not have
known what she looked like?

I'm in.

Okay, but you understand what
you're agreeing to, right?

Sure.

You want me to bounty
hunt this Burt scumbag

and pretend to deliver his package.

But we'll need you to
work with us on this one.

We'll set up the meet and everything.

Do I still get to rough
him up before the cops do?

We'll be close by,
but technically, yeah.

More in. You want to know why?

Because we're running out of time

and you're our only option?

No.

Because I'm awesome.

Because I take risks for my friends

and I don't need your thanks.

Am I supposed to be
thanking you for something?

No.

Because self-worth comes
from within, bitches.

Now,

if you'll excuse me,

I need to slut this up.

Brother. Hello.

Just getting ready for
a little sting operation.

Right.

I should've assumed you'd be busy.

I can come back.

Well, no, no, that's not a euphemism.

I mean an actual police sting operation.

But actually, whilst you're here...

Here.

Do you think I'm boyfriend material?

Luci, you've never exactly been the type

to get emotionally attached.

To anyone.

So I've come to realize, but...

what does that say about me, brother?

Is this about Chloe?

And why would you think that?

Mom, she... told me what happened

or what almost happened, apparently.

Did she now?

So, I suppose you're gonna tell me

humans and the divine don't mix.

Luci, listen, I have underestimated you

for all of my existence,

both in your ability to frustrate me

and your capacity for good.

Even though you'll
never admit it, but...

when it comes to Chloe...

perhaps you've been
underestimating yourself.

Careful, brother. That sounds
dangerously like a compliment.

Take it how you like.

You never listen to my advice, anyway.

Just one of your many charms.

Liar.

But you're not, Luci.

So, if you really want to know

if you're a worthy romantic partner...

ask yourself.

Can you guys hear me?

Why are you sitting so close?

The killer won't show
if this reeks of a setup.

Exactly. If we were strangers,
you'd be hitting on me.

Looks like we'll be getting

that celebratory drink after all.

Two vodkas, please.

Peacock has landed.

Okay.

Any sign of Burt?

Not yet, but I'll stick around
until someone approaches.

What?

I think I just figured
out what's wrong with you.

Yeah? And what would that be, Maze?

You need to own up to what you did.

Yeah. Be proud of it.

Maze, we talked about this

and besides...

Self-worth comes from within, Dan.

No, I think I'm good. Thank you.

I don't think you are.

I think you'd feel a lot better

if you just came clean.

Don't.

If you won't say it, I will.

- Maze...
- For your own good.

Don't say another word.

Why?

So what if you slept
with Charlotte Richards?

Dan slept with Charlotte?

Trust me, you're not half
as disgusted by that as I am.

Is there anyone who hasn't
slept with that woman?

Which is hard to believe

since you've slept with
everyone else in L.A.

Well, everyone except you, Detective.

I mean, not that I want to.

I mean, of course I want to, but...

right now all I'm concerned about

is proving my worth to you.

Unless of course you've
changed your mind about the sex.

Okay, there will be no sex.

As far as our so-called moment,

I let my emotions get the best
of me the other night, okay?

I made a mistake.

You and me, it's not happening.

You have to accept, Lucifer,

that we are very different people

with very different priorities.

My priority right now is this case.

Okay? So, just...

step outside and get some air.

I don't need air.

Well, I do.

Right.

Understood.

A man just entered the bar.

Got you.

You are one of the
prettiest flight attendants

I've ever seen.

I'm Burt.

Hi, Burt.

You ready for takeoff?

They're on their way to the hotel room.

Are you ready for the package?

I think that's
supposed to be my line.

I know you killed that flight attendant

and her friend, dirtbag.

No, no, no! My name's Jim!

Some guy gave me a C-note,

told me to sit next to
you and say I was Burt.

If that's not our
killer then where is he?

I believe you have
something that belongs to me.

Burt, I presume.

Can I keep him?

Get her off me! She's insane!

Well, you better start talking.

Where's the man that paid you?

I don't know. He saw some tall
guy with dark hair in a suit.

He took off.

That's Lucifer.

Yeah.

Recognized you from the beach party.

Of course. Tommy Bahama.

It's good that you found me,

'cause I've been meaning to
ask you something since then.

Where'd you get the water slide?

I'd love one for Lux.

I'm not sure where I'd put it...

I want my package.

Now.

I should've known Jana left it
with you after I saw her at Lux.

That's why she was only there
a few minutes... to stash it.

No, the reason that she
left so quickly was because

she was unhappy that I
didn't have sex with her.

Yeah, I don't believe you.

No one says no to a girl like that.

I'm finding it hard to believe
myself, trust me, but,

as for your package, Burt...

I don't have it.

Liar.

Come now.

Surely a little bit of cocaine

isn't worth all the senseless killing.

Cocaine?

What's in that package is
far more valuable than drugs.

It's my ass on the line,

and that stupid bitch Jana...

You don't speak of her that way.

You promised Jana the world

and everything she could ever desire.

Money, drugs, a life of pleasure,

but she deserved better than that...

better than you...

or me.

I mean, what did either
of us really give her?

Empty pleasure?

Hey, man...

we can work something out.

I'll find the package.
I'll get paid. We'll...

We're similar in a lot
of ways, aren't we, Burt?

Except for one.

You're a bad man and I'm not.

I'm much...

much worse than that.

Lucifer!

There's your killer, detectives.

Think you'll find he
feels quite remorseful

about the life he's led.

Please... okay, p-please,
just-just arrest me, okay?

Okay, get up. I'm sorry.

- I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
- Stand up.

I'm sorry.

Hey.

About what you heard in the van...

Hey, it doesn't matter...

except something still bothers me.

Burt went to a lot of trouble
for a single drug deal.

Yeah, well... the guy had
a reputation to protect.

You know? One person steals from him,

everyone else thinks they can, too.

All right. But then who has the package?

How... how did you find me?

I'm sorry I took it. I was desperate.

I'm broke.

When the stewardess let it slip

how much cash she was gonna
make from this delivery, I...

I thought it was drugs.

I was gonna sell them.

Then I opened it.

One of them broke.

I spilled a little on myself. Now...

What the hell is happening to me?

Hey, I've been looking
for you everywhere.

I tracked your phone's GPS.

Well... here I am.

Well, we should wrap
up the arrest report,

and by that I mean paperwork,
not some celebratory drink

that you'll then turn into a moment.

Yes, well...

I've changed my mind
about that, actually.

I realized it would
never work out between us.

- Really?
- Yes.

So, from now on, no
more attempts at moments.

I'd be honored to, simply
continue working by your side...

if you'll have me.

Of course.

- Good.
- Yeah.

It's not like you to give up, but...

No, I haven't given up.

I had a... an epiphany, of sorts.

You deserve someone worthy
of you and that isn't me.

That's not what I've
been saying, Lucifer.

I know. It's what I'm saying.

You... deserve someone better

because you, Detective,

are selfless to a nauseating degree.

You always put your daughter first,

even though the ungrateful
urchin does nothing

to contribute to the rent.

So...

you deserve someone
worthy of that grace.

Someone who knows that every
crime scene breaks your heart,

even though you'd never admit it.

Someone who actually appreciates

your impossibly boring middle name.

Jane.

More importantly, Detective,
you deserve someone

as good as you...

because...

well, you're special and I'm...

I'm not worth it.

Yeah, you're probably right.

Detective...