Love Me (2022–…): Season 1, Episode 4 - Episode #1.4 - full transcript
- Aaron Mathieson?
- You would
have had a good chance
of getting the clerkship, Aaron.
Unfortunately there
is one major problem.
It's kind of a big one.
- Okay.
- You're wearing my outfit.
- I am so sorry about that.
- The look on your face.
- What?
- I'm just kidding.
Next time, try not
to look so suave.
- Yeah.
- Bit of a dip in the
H1s last semester.
Otherwise, pretty consistent.
Been partying a
little too hard, huh?
Final year.
Cutting loose?
- Um, well I...
Sorry, yeah.
Ah, yes.
Yeah, you could say that, yeah.
- Right.
Well, that's all over now.
- Of course, yeah.
- Although some of us do
like to go out for
Friday night drinks.
Always a fun night.
- Oh, okay.
- So tell me which other firms
have you been interviewing with?
- Heya.
- Hi, darling.
- How's it going?
- Yeah, good, good, good.
- The cards are all canceled.
Is there something
else that I need to do?
- Well, your mom's ashes
are ready to be collected.
- Oh, Dad, that can wait.
It's a crematorium.
It's not the post office.
- Oh, well, yes.
- It's not like they
can send them back.
- Well, okay, darling.
I know you're busy.
I'll collect them
when I get back.
- Oh, no, it's okay.
I'm sorry, I'll get it.
I'll do it.
- Really?
Are you sure?
- Yep, no, I'm sure.
It's fine.
- Oh, okay.
Look, I really appreciate it...
- Hey.
Um, sorry Dad, I gotta go.
- Okay.
Yes, darling.
- Okay, yep.
- Well you
take care of yourself.
- Yep.
Okay.
- I'll see you
in a few days, okay?
- Gotta, bye.
Hi.
- Okay.
- Okay, bye.
- Yeah, bye now.
- Bye-bye.
Bye.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- What?
- Huh?
- Hm?
- Nothing.
Just this, I guess.
- It's too fast, isn't it?
- No.
No, it's totally normal to
be moving in after two weeks.
- Look, if this is too weird...
- No.
- I can go
and stay with Hazeem...
- Sorry, no.
No.
- Good.
'Cause I wouldn't enjoy
sleeping with Hazeem as much.
Hey, I wanted to...
- So are you gonna
leave that there or...
- No, no, that's the
perfect spot for it, right?
- Well, it's right in
the middle of the room.
- Mm-hmm.
- I'm just thinking, to...
- Okay.
Ah, so.
Ah, where do you want it?
Ah, what about here?
- No, no, no.
No.
Maybe just put it over there.
To balance the um...
- Over here?
- Yeah.
That's fine.
Hm.
- Are you sure this is okay?
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
- Yes.
- Okay.
Good.
Well, you stay right here.
I'm going to grab
more of my stuff
and ruin your Feng Shui.
- I don't believe in Feng Shui.
But this is wrong.
- Oh.
- Just one more.
- Oh, okay.
Oh, stop, stop, stop.
Been a while.
- Huh?
- Christine used to
always be very conscious
of salt and sugar so you
know, we watched our diets.
- Ah, a little bit doesn't hurt.
I mean, how else do
you get the flavor?
Oh, except with fat.
- Oh.
- Oh, gosh, you know when
Joe, my husband, was sick
he went on this extreme diet.
Oh, it was awful.
I had to serve him up
these tasteless meals.
I mean, if you take away
all the guilty pleasures,
what are you left with?
I mean, that is no way to die.
- No.
- Sir, we have a table
for you and your...
- Ah, wife.
Thank you, Vikash.
Sorry, seems easier for
the poor man if we...
- Sure.
- We good?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
- There's great
vibes from the staff,
and they've got a little
bit of pro bono work.
And you can order in on
the firm's account, 24/7.
24/7.
- That's to keep
you at your desk.
- No, it's just, you know,
if you're a little extra busy
or instead of a
cafeteria, you know.
Why, what's up?
- I've got good news as well.
- Really?
- Yep.
You remember the,
you remember the support
act gig I went for?
- No.
- I got it.
- Oh, my god.
- I know.
How good is it?
- Wow.
- And it's so much
bigger than I thought
it was gonna be as well.
It's the whole east coast.
- Amazing.
Yeah, that's, wow.
- What?
Why are you being weird?
- I mean, there's a lot
of festivals this year.
- Yeah.
- I mean, do you have
to go away again?
- Yeah, that's what I do.
But you can come with me.
- Yeah, but what
about my clerkship?
- I mean, it'll be fun.
We can take Lux's Kombi.
I'll gig at night time and
then in the day we can hike.
We can swim.
Fuck.
It'll be so cute.
- Wait, hold on.
This isn't a paid gig?
- No, but I mean, it's
huge for my career.
- Not even flights
or accommodation?
- No, but you don't turn
down big tours like this.
- It's the same
with my clerkship.
- Okay, fine, well
then don't come.
- Ella, I don't want
to do long distance.
- Well then what?
- I don't know.
Don't take a job
that isn't paying.
- Your job's barely paying.
- Yeah, but it's something.
- Okay, well this is my
work, so I'm gonna go.
You can either come with me,
or you can sit in your bougie
little office, ordering in.
Whatever.
- Law?
So what area?
- Probate.
- Ah, so, ah, no 'Perry Mason'
or 'The Good Wife'
kind of action?
- Ah, no more 'Rumpole
of the Bailey'.
No, not even that,
not even that.
Definitely not the
glamorous side of the law.
Much more the other
end of the spectrum.
- Right.
- But there was
something very satisfying
about helping people
sort out their wills.
- No, it's interesting,
I mean, constantly
dealing with mortality.
I mean, I imagine that
must have an impact.
- Oh, I don't know.
Wish it did, you know.
We had so many
retirement travel plans
that we just never, you know.
There's always such a focus
on work in our household.
I'm not sure that
was the best thing
to pass onto the kids,
but you know, they're
both very driven.
Well, Clara more
than Aaron, but.
- Are you close to them?
- The kids?
- Mm.
- Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, they're
grown up now really,
but you never stop
worrying about them.
Did you ever...
Sorry, it's probably
not polite to ask.
- No, it's fine.
Not really.
I, um, you know I met Joe
when I was in my late 40s
and you know, I've got
friends and family and art
and, well, this.
And that's always
been enough for me.
Oh, and my work,
to, if I'm honest.
So it's probably good
I didn't have kids
or I would have passed
on all the wrong things.
- Oh, I don't think
it's work so much.
It's, you know, I just...
I just wonder if we
didn't, you know,
we taught them, you know.
I just worry that
they're not very happy.
- You hungry?
- I don't know.
We going straight to the big
philosophical questions, are we?
- What?
- What?
What'd you say?
- Are you hungry?
- Oh.
- What?
What'd you think I said?
- Happy.
- Well, are you happy?
- Are you hungry?
- I'm a model.
Yes, I'm always hungry.
But I'm very happy.
- Hey.
I don't even know
your last name.
I mean, I know it
starts with a K, but...
- Oh.
- Is that it?
Like that celebrity.
- No, no.
It's my modeling name.
I picked it when I was like 17,
and it stuck, regrettably.
But, um, you know, it's
more like a brand thing.
- Oh, so you're a brand.
- So the K
doesn't actually
stand for anything.
- Peter K's a brand.
- Yeah.
Peter K's a brand.
Probably heard of it.
- What's, so what's
your last name?
- Oh, it's kind of embarrassing.
- Oh, my god, now
I have to know.
- Do you?
- Don't I?
- Do you?
Okay.
Fine.
Cockburn.
Yes, that's right.
Cockburn.
Peter Cockburn.
- I'm sorry?
- Yeah.
- Oh.
- It's not that bad.
- So your ancestors are cocks?
- Very funny.
On my dad's side, a little bit.
But no, it's just like
an old English derivation
of the word cocca,
meaning rooster.
- I can't.
This is...
- What?
- No, this is why women need
to just keep their names.
- Well, I mean, I would be
happy to take your name.
Peter Mathieson.
Model.
- She'll be up till 10.
- Isn't that past your bedtime?
- Oh.
Goodnight, Goodnight
Construction Site, three times.
Did you get us that book?
- No.
- Peter?
- Mm-hmm?
- Is it true...
- No more, Vick.
- Just one.
That male underwear models
put a slice of bread down
their front to, you know,
smooth out their bits?
- Really?
- What?
- Like a Ken doll?
- I read it somewhere.
- I mean, I've heard of
guys using cock rings
to like engorge the penis.
- That makes sense.
- So.
Do you like have fans...
- You said one more.
- Coming up to you?
- Oh, god, no.
No one knows who
male models are.
- I mean, that's true, isn't it?
I mean, I can't think
of a single male model.
- Okay, she's brutal, and gay,
so you shouldn't listen to her.
- Sorry.
- No, it's true.
I mean, I couldn't do
it if I was a woman.
I mean, you just couldn't
walk down the street.
- Mom.
- What?
- My sock is sad.
- Sock's asleep.
- Sock's aren't alive.
Go to sleep, please.
- So should you be.
Quick, new topic
while she's eating.
- Oh, ah, oh.
We have news.
- Pregnant.
- No.
Jesus, Sasha.
No.
Ah, no, Peter's moved in.
- Oh, wow.
- Mm.
- That's a big deal.
- Oh, not...
- I guess you won't be
dropping around so often.
Kidding.
Peter, you're welcome
here any time.
- Thank you.
- I have more questions.
- No, no, it's just temporary,
while his ceiling gets fixed.
- Or sooner.
I'm mindful of parameters.
Or until she realizes that I
am punching above my weight.
- Mom.
- Hey.
What are you doing
out of bed, Aish?
What's up?
- Hey, do you wanna play a game?
It's called be like cement.
Have you played it before?
No?
Well it's pretty fun.
Okay, so first, we lay the
cement, so we lie down.
And then we let it set,
and then we stay still,
so whoever can stay the stillest
the longest wins the game.
- I love this game.
I play it with my
patients at work.
- Yeah.
- It's good fun.
Do you wanna play?
- Hey, what about
playing it in bed?
- Yeah.
- Let's go play it in bed.
- Oh, my god.
- Be like cement.
- Be like cement.
Amazing.
- Yeah, honestly, I had no
idea that that would work.
- It's genius.
- Oh, goodness.
- I was about to
say the same thing.
- Hold that thought.
I'm just going to
go powder my nose.
- Did you really think you
could move on that easily?
40 years, Glen.
What are you doing?
- Oh.
- Glen, are you okay?
I got us some Sex on the Beach.
I'm so sorry.
Glen?
Are you okay?
- Oh.
I'm so sorry.
I, I shouldn't have
left you there.
- No, no...
- I was, I was...
- It's fine, it's fine.
- I haven't felt
like that for...
I don't know.
That was...
You're an extraordinary
woman, Anita.
And...
But I, I don't, I don't,
I don't think, I can't, it's...
I'm sorry.
- It's okay.
It's a very difficult time.
And I don't want
to pressure you.
- Well, that's...
- Maybe, um...
Maybe we should just be friends.
- Oh.
Well, I'd-I'd
certainly like that.
- Here.
- Thank you.
What, what is this?
- Oh, it's called
something with vodka,
peach and cranberry juice.
- Ah.
Yeah, and it's delicious.
- And it's very good
for the urinary tract.
- Yeah, keep the seniors happy.
- Good work, Marie Curie.
- What do you think?
Should I go away with her?
- She's been constipated.
- Oh, yuck.
- Ah, I mean, you've just
started the clerkship.
- And?
- And you were lucky to get it.
- Yeah, but so, you don't need
a clerkship to get
a job, you know,
and maybe there's
more than study
and work and
picking up dog shit.
- This is god's work.
- Yeah, but it could
be awesome, you know.
I could, I could really go.
I mean, why shouldn't I go?
I could be driving up the coast.
- You get carsick just
driving to Geelong.
- I could be stopping
along the way.
I mean, we could be
camping, whatever...
- I had to take you to
hospital for motion sickness.
Come on.
- Could be hiking,
I mean hanging at the beach.
- You're not outdoorsy.
- I'd be fucking
under the stars.
- Aaron, this isn't you.
At all.
You are a nerd.
You like Greek myths and poetry.
Why are you all of a sudden
wanting to drop
your entire future
for some girl that you have
nothing in common with,
apart from the fact
that you trigger
each other's dopamine receptors?
- Can you stop with
the science, okay?
Not everything is science.
- Literally
everything is science.
- You're so anti-monogamy.
- I'm not.
- Jesse, you've never
been in love, okay,
so you don't actually know
what you're talking about.
Seriously?
- I was aiming for the bin.
- The bin?
There is no bin.
- I finally got them
after my fourth try.
- Four times?
It took you four
tests to get your Ps?
- It's not my fault.
- You shouldn't be
allowed to drive.
- Every car has
faulty speedometers.
If anything, it's the car's
fault that I was speeding,
'cause it was doing...
- Yeah, sure,
that's sound logic.
- What's your
embarrassing story?
- You know what?
I'll show you.
- Oh, okay.
- I present to
you the cardipant.
- You look ridiculous.
- Oh, couture ridiculous.
- No, this is definitely more
embarrassing than my thing.
- No.
I'm not wholly
responsible for this.
There was a whole
team of people,
whereas you...
- I'm sorry.
No, that was 15 years ago.
When did you say yes to this?
Willingly shoot this?
- Yes, mine's worse.
- Okay, next.
Ah, biggest regret.
Easy.
Year 12 formal dress.
Not as impractical
as the cardipant,
but definitely a bit too
adventurous for the class of '01.
Yours?
- Hm.
Okay, biggest regret.
I collapsed on a shoot.
I'd been working
non-stop for 20 years
and I wasn't looking
after myself.
Ended up in Emergency.
- Oh, shit.
I'm sorry.
- No, no, it's okay.
It had to happen.
But you know, it
forced me to slow down
and reprioritise my life,
and spend some more
time with my son.
I can't believe you'd just
come out with it casually,
like you're talking
about the weather.
What else haven't you told me?
- Ah, what do you mean?
- Are you married?
- No.
- How old is your son?
- Ah, he's 15.
- Why did you lie to me?
I mean, what kind of a person...
- I didn't lie.
- Moves in with someone
and doesn't tell them
that they have a son.
What were you expecting, Peter?
That we would just
be here in my house
and play happy
family with your kid?
Why is this here?
- Okay, I'm sorry.
I thought that they'd
be out of the way.
- I knew it.
I knew this was too
good to be true.
- Clara, I'm sorry.
I planned to tell
you several times.
I am trying to talk to you now.
Where are you going?
- I'm going to pick up
my dead mother's ashes.
Hey.
Where are you?
Get ready, I'm going
to pick you up.
Now.
You okay?
- Yep.
I don't know.
- No.
I've only got two left.
- What's wrong with you?
- Peter has a kid.
- Right.
- That he didn't tell me about.
- Right.
- That's it?
No other reaction?
- Um...
Oh, my god, Clara,
what'd the police say?
Tell me, please.
- Shut up.
Mom was right.
You should never back
the shiniest horse.
Always go for the
tired, dependable horse.
Then you know what
you're getting.
Are you even listening to me?
- Yeah.
You're talking about horses.
- No, it's a metaphor.
For the fact that I never
choose the right men.
- Yeah, but who cares
if he has a kid?
- I don't care
about the kid part.
I care about the lying part.
Yeah, this is it.
Charming name.
It's 8:58 for fuck's sake.
- Jesus.
- We've come to
pick up our mother's ashes.
- Of course.
Sorry for your loss.
- Okay, thanks, yeah.
Her name's Christine Mathieson.
- I don't know why
I have to be here.
- Well, she's your mom too.
- Did you make an appointment?
- Did we need to?
- An appointment to pick
up our dead mother's ashes.
- It's standard procedure.
In the email...
- Yeah, well is there any way
that we can just
pick her up now?
- Not sure.
Um, my dad's out
at the moment...
- So in the email, it said
that everything's ready,
so would her ashes
be here or not?
- Yes.
All cremains remain
on the premises,
but notice to collect
is usually required.
- I'm sorry, did you
just say cremains?
- Yes.
Cremated remains.
Cremains.
- Jesus Christ.
- Can we, can you please
just go and find them?
- I'll see what I can do.
- Why couldn't Dad
have done this himself,
instead of taking
a fucking holiday?
- Would you chill so we
can get this over with?
- You chill.
- Okay, I think this is the one.
- I'm sorry, did you just say,
"You think," this is our mother?
- Can you please fill
out her release form?
- Yeah, I'll do that.
Ah, what if we don't know where
we're spreading the ashes?
- Well we don't really know if
these are our mother's ashes,
do we, so...
- Ah, just list a ballpark
place, if you don't mind.
It's procedure.
Ah, do you have a
permit for that park?
- Um, no.
- 'Cause you can't just
spread ashes at a park
without a permit.
- Oh, then, yes,
we have a permit.
- Okay, then.
- Absolutely.
- Oh, my god.
- Okay.
All done.
- I'm not touching that.
No.
- Sorry about him.
- That's fine.
- Oh, it's heavy.
Thanks.
- See you later.
- Hope not.
Thank you.
Thanks for coming.
You can come with me
to the airport tomorrow
to pick up Dad if you want.
- Brilliant.
You smoking again?
That's so unhealthy, Clara.
- Oh, please, tell me
more about health fads.
- Ell wants me to go away
with her to the coast.
In a Kombi van.
- Seriously?
- Yeah.
- Don't you think you
two are a little bit too,
I don't know, different?
- I mean, opposites
attract, you know.
- Right.
- We're in love.
She's it, I reckon.
- Oh, come on.
How can you possibly know that?
You're too young.
- Mom and Dad were young.
- Mom and Dad got married
young and fought for 40 years.
- No, they didn't.
- Hardly the best example.
- No.
- Yeah, they did.
- They were soulmates.
- Oh.
- Oh, yeah, great.
Classy, Clara.
- I'm sorry.
I'll put it out in Mom's
cremains next time, will I?
- For fuck's sake.
- What?
- What is wrong with you?
- It's a joke.
- No, it isn't.
- I'm sorry.
Sorry.
I'm just, I'm not good at...
I'm grieving too, you know.
- I think about
her all the time.
Like every second of every day.
- Come on.
I'll take you home.
- Thanks.
- What's that?
Mom said if you want shotgun,
you've gotta race her.
- And here is your wife, sir.
- Oh, I'm sorry, Vikash,
I'm not his wife, actually.
- My apologies.
- Sorry.
- And I think maybe
separate tables today.
- Of course.
- Sorry.
Popular time.
There you go.
Bon appetit.
- Thank you.
I guess you need
a bit of flavor...
- Thank you, but I'm
eating an apple danish.
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
- Well, here's cheers.
- Oh, look...
I shouldn't have
kissed you last night.
No, you're right.
- No, no, no.
- No.
You're right, it was too much.
And I know that I
suggested friends
but I don't think I can do that.
I'm very attracted to you.
So I don't think
we can be friends.
And I'm very sorry.
- Hey.
- Actually, I will
order a cocktail.
- What can I get for you?
- Don't know its name but it has
vodka, cranberry
and peach in it.
- Sex on the Beach.
- Pardon?
- The cocktail.
- Oh, that's what it's called?
- Yeah.
- Kelly, could I get
a Sex on the Beach
for the gentlemen, please.
- I wanna go with you.
- Wait, what?
- Whatever you want, okay?
I mean, I love you.
Look.
Look.
What?
Hey?
You okay?
What's wrong?
What is it?
- I slept with
someone last night.
- Hi.
- Oh, hey.
- Oh, I've just had a massage.
I want to get all the
inclusions in before I leave.
- Yeah, that's lovely.
Sorry.
- Thanks.
- I'm so, so sorry
about last night.
- Yeah, I'm sorry too.
- No, you
don't have to be.
- But I am.
- Okay.
- Okay.
- You're absolutely glorious.
- So are you.
- Are you even sure
he's on this flight?
- He printed out the
itinerary for me, Aaron.
Chill.
- You chill.
Well, did you call him much?
- No, he called me
a couple of times.
You?
- No.
Ah.
- There he is.
Is that Dad?
- Oh, my-my kids are here.
- What?
- My kids are here.
- Did you know they were coming?
- No, no.
They've obviously
come to pick me up.
- You would
have had a good chance
of getting the clerkship, Aaron.
Unfortunately there
is one major problem.
It's kind of a big one.
- Okay.
- You're wearing my outfit.
- I am so sorry about that.
- The look on your face.
- What?
- I'm just kidding.
Next time, try not
to look so suave.
- Yeah.
- Bit of a dip in the
H1s last semester.
Otherwise, pretty consistent.
Been partying a
little too hard, huh?
Final year.
Cutting loose?
- Um, well I...
Sorry, yeah.
Ah, yes.
Yeah, you could say that, yeah.
- Right.
Well, that's all over now.
- Of course, yeah.
- Although some of us do
like to go out for
Friday night drinks.
Always a fun night.
- Oh, okay.
- So tell me which other firms
have you been interviewing with?
- Heya.
- Hi, darling.
- How's it going?
- Yeah, good, good, good.
- The cards are all canceled.
Is there something
else that I need to do?
- Well, your mom's ashes
are ready to be collected.
- Oh, Dad, that can wait.
It's a crematorium.
It's not the post office.
- Oh, well, yes.
- It's not like they
can send them back.
- Well, okay, darling.
I know you're busy.
I'll collect them
when I get back.
- Oh, no, it's okay.
I'm sorry, I'll get it.
I'll do it.
- Really?
Are you sure?
- Yep, no, I'm sure.
It's fine.
- Oh, okay.
Look, I really appreciate it...
- Hey.
Um, sorry Dad, I gotta go.
- Okay.
Yes, darling.
- Okay, yep.
- Well you
take care of yourself.
- Yep.
Okay.
- I'll see you
in a few days, okay?
- Gotta, bye.
Hi.
- Okay.
- Okay, bye.
- Yeah, bye now.
- Bye-bye.
Bye.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- What?
- Huh?
- Hm?
- Nothing.
Just this, I guess.
- It's too fast, isn't it?
- No.
No, it's totally normal to
be moving in after two weeks.
- Look, if this is too weird...
- No.
- I can go
and stay with Hazeem...
- Sorry, no.
No.
- Good.
'Cause I wouldn't enjoy
sleeping with Hazeem as much.
Hey, I wanted to...
- So are you gonna
leave that there or...
- No, no, that's the
perfect spot for it, right?
- Well, it's right in
the middle of the room.
- Mm-hmm.
- I'm just thinking, to...
- Okay.
Ah, so.
Ah, where do you want it?
Ah, what about here?
- No, no, no.
No.
Maybe just put it over there.
To balance the um...
- Over here?
- Yeah.
That's fine.
Hm.
- Are you sure this is okay?
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
- Yes.
- Okay.
Good.
Well, you stay right here.
I'm going to grab
more of my stuff
and ruin your Feng Shui.
- I don't believe in Feng Shui.
But this is wrong.
- Oh.
- Just one more.
- Oh, okay.
Oh, stop, stop, stop.
Been a while.
- Huh?
- Christine used to
always be very conscious
of salt and sugar so you
know, we watched our diets.
- Ah, a little bit doesn't hurt.
I mean, how else do
you get the flavor?
Oh, except with fat.
- Oh.
- Oh, gosh, you know when
Joe, my husband, was sick
he went on this extreme diet.
Oh, it was awful.
I had to serve him up
these tasteless meals.
I mean, if you take away
all the guilty pleasures,
what are you left with?
I mean, that is no way to die.
- No.
- Sir, we have a table
for you and your...
- Ah, wife.
Thank you, Vikash.
Sorry, seems easier for
the poor man if we...
- Sure.
- We good?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
- There's great
vibes from the staff,
and they've got a little
bit of pro bono work.
And you can order in on
the firm's account, 24/7.
24/7.
- That's to keep
you at your desk.
- No, it's just, you know,
if you're a little extra busy
or instead of a
cafeteria, you know.
Why, what's up?
- I've got good news as well.
- Really?
- Yep.
You remember the,
you remember the support
act gig I went for?
- No.
- I got it.
- Oh, my god.
- I know.
How good is it?
- Wow.
- And it's so much
bigger than I thought
it was gonna be as well.
It's the whole east coast.
- Amazing.
Yeah, that's, wow.
- What?
Why are you being weird?
- I mean, there's a lot
of festivals this year.
- Yeah.
- I mean, do you have
to go away again?
- Yeah, that's what I do.
But you can come with me.
- Yeah, but what
about my clerkship?
- I mean, it'll be fun.
We can take Lux's Kombi.
I'll gig at night time and
then in the day we can hike.
We can swim.
Fuck.
It'll be so cute.
- Wait, hold on.
This isn't a paid gig?
- No, but I mean, it's
huge for my career.
- Not even flights
or accommodation?
- No, but you don't turn
down big tours like this.
- It's the same
with my clerkship.
- Okay, fine, well
then don't come.
- Ella, I don't want
to do long distance.
- Well then what?
- I don't know.
Don't take a job
that isn't paying.
- Your job's barely paying.
- Yeah, but it's something.
- Okay, well this is my
work, so I'm gonna go.
You can either come with me,
or you can sit in your bougie
little office, ordering in.
Whatever.
- Law?
So what area?
- Probate.
- Ah, so, ah, no 'Perry Mason'
or 'The Good Wife'
kind of action?
- Ah, no more 'Rumpole
of the Bailey'.
No, not even that,
not even that.
Definitely not the
glamorous side of the law.
Much more the other
end of the spectrum.
- Right.
- But there was
something very satisfying
about helping people
sort out their wills.
- No, it's interesting,
I mean, constantly
dealing with mortality.
I mean, I imagine that
must have an impact.
- Oh, I don't know.
Wish it did, you know.
We had so many
retirement travel plans
that we just never, you know.
There's always such a focus
on work in our household.
I'm not sure that
was the best thing
to pass onto the kids,
but you know, they're
both very driven.
Well, Clara more
than Aaron, but.
- Are you close to them?
- The kids?
- Mm.
- Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, they're
grown up now really,
but you never stop
worrying about them.
Did you ever...
Sorry, it's probably
not polite to ask.
- No, it's fine.
Not really.
I, um, you know I met Joe
when I was in my late 40s
and you know, I've got
friends and family and art
and, well, this.
And that's always
been enough for me.
Oh, and my work,
to, if I'm honest.
So it's probably good
I didn't have kids
or I would have passed
on all the wrong things.
- Oh, I don't think
it's work so much.
It's, you know, I just...
I just wonder if we
didn't, you know,
we taught them, you know.
I just worry that
they're not very happy.
- You hungry?
- I don't know.
We going straight to the big
philosophical questions, are we?
- What?
- What?
What'd you say?
- Are you hungry?
- Oh.
- What?
What'd you think I said?
- Happy.
- Well, are you happy?
- Are you hungry?
- I'm a model.
Yes, I'm always hungry.
But I'm very happy.
- Hey.
I don't even know
your last name.
I mean, I know it
starts with a K, but...
- Oh.
- Is that it?
Like that celebrity.
- No, no.
It's my modeling name.
I picked it when I was like 17,
and it stuck, regrettably.
But, um, you know, it's
more like a brand thing.
- Oh, so you're a brand.
- So the K
doesn't actually
stand for anything.
- Peter K's a brand.
- Yeah.
Peter K's a brand.
Probably heard of it.
- What's, so what's
your last name?
- Oh, it's kind of embarrassing.
- Oh, my god, now
I have to know.
- Do you?
- Don't I?
- Do you?
Okay.
Fine.
Cockburn.
Yes, that's right.
Cockburn.
Peter Cockburn.
- I'm sorry?
- Yeah.
- Oh.
- It's not that bad.
- So your ancestors are cocks?
- Very funny.
On my dad's side, a little bit.
But no, it's just like
an old English derivation
of the word cocca,
meaning rooster.
- I can't.
This is...
- What?
- No, this is why women need
to just keep their names.
- Well, I mean, I would be
happy to take your name.
Peter Mathieson.
Model.
- She'll be up till 10.
- Isn't that past your bedtime?
- Oh.
Goodnight, Goodnight
Construction Site, three times.
Did you get us that book?
- No.
- Peter?
- Mm-hmm?
- Is it true...
- No more, Vick.
- Just one.
That male underwear models
put a slice of bread down
their front to, you know,
smooth out their bits?
- Really?
- What?
- Like a Ken doll?
- I read it somewhere.
- I mean, I've heard of
guys using cock rings
to like engorge the penis.
- That makes sense.
- So.
Do you like have fans...
- You said one more.
- Coming up to you?
- Oh, god, no.
No one knows who
male models are.
- I mean, that's true, isn't it?
I mean, I can't think
of a single male model.
- Okay, she's brutal, and gay,
so you shouldn't listen to her.
- Sorry.
- No, it's true.
I mean, I couldn't do
it if I was a woman.
I mean, you just couldn't
walk down the street.
- Mom.
- What?
- My sock is sad.
- Sock's asleep.
- Sock's aren't alive.
Go to sleep, please.
- So should you be.
Quick, new topic
while she's eating.
- Oh, ah, oh.
We have news.
- Pregnant.
- No.
Jesus, Sasha.
No.
Ah, no, Peter's moved in.
- Oh, wow.
- Mm.
- That's a big deal.
- Oh, not...
- I guess you won't be
dropping around so often.
Kidding.
Peter, you're welcome
here any time.
- Thank you.
- I have more questions.
- No, no, it's just temporary,
while his ceiling gets fixed.
- Or sooner.
I'm mindful of parameters.
Or until she realizes that I
am punching above my weight.
- Mom.
- Hey.
What are you doing
out of bed, Aish?
What's up?
- Hey, do you wanna play a game?
It's called be like cement.
Have you played it before?
No?
Well it's pretty fun.
Okay, so first, we lay the
cement, so we lie down.
And then we let it set,
and then we stay still,
so whoever can stay the stillest
the longest wins the game.
- I love this game.
I play it with my
patients at work.
- Yeah.
- It's good fun.
Do you wanna play?
- Hey, what about
playing it in bed?
- Yeah.
- Let's go play it in bed.
- Oh, my god.
- Be like cement.
- Be like cement.
Amazing.
- Yeah, honestly, I had no
idea that that would work.
- It's genius.
- Oh, goodness.
- I was about to
say the same thing.
- Hold that thought.
I'm just going to
go powder my nose.
- Did you really think you
could move on that easily?
40 years, Glen.
What are you doing?
- Oh.
- Glen, are you okay?
I got us some Sex on the Beach.
I'm so sorry.
Glen?
Are you okay?
- Oh.
I'm so sorry.
I, I shouldn't have
left you there.
- No, no...
- I was, I was...
- It's fine, it's fine.
- I haven't felt
like that for...
I don't know.
That was...
You're an extraordinary
woman, Anita.
And...
But I, I don't, I don't,
I don't think, I can't, it's...
I'm sorry.
- It's okay.
It's a very difficult time.
And I don't want
to pressure you.
- Well, that's...
- Maybe, um...
Maybe we should just be friends.
- Oh.
Well, I'd-I'd
certainly like that.
- Here.
- Thank you.
What, what is this?
- Oh, it's called
something with vodka,
peach and cranberry juice.
- Ah.
Yeah, and it's delicious.
- And it's very good
for the urinary tract.
- Yeah, keep the seniors happy.
- Good work, Marie Curie.
- What do you think?
Should I go away with her?
- She's been constipated.
- Oh, yuck.
- Ah, I mean, you've just
started the clerkship.
- And?
- And you were lucky to get it.
- Yeah, but so, you don't need
a clerkship to get
a job, you know,
and maybe there's
more than study
and work and
picking up dog shit.
- This is god's work.
- Yeah, but it could
be awesome, you know.
I could, I could really go.
I mean, why shouldn't I go?
I could be driving up the coast.
- You get carsick just
driving to Geelong.
- I could be stopping
along the way.
I mean, we could be
camping, whatever...
- I had to take you to
hospital for motion sickness.
Come on.
- Could be hiking,
I mean hanging at the beach.
- You're not outdoorsy.
- I'd be fucking
under the stars.
- Aaron, this isn't you.
At all.
You are a nerd.
You like Greek myths and poetry.
Why are you all of a sudden
wanting to drop
your entire future
for some girl that you have
nothing in common with,
apart from the fact
that you trigger
each other's dopamine receptors?
- Can you stop with
the science, okay?
Not everything is science.
- Literally
everything is science.
- You're so anti-monogamy.
- I'm not.
- Jesse, you've never
been in love, okay,
so you don't actually know
what you're talking about.
Seriously?
- I was aiming for the bin.
- The bin?
There is no bin.
- I finally got them
after my fourth try.
- Four times?
It took you four
tests to get your Ps?
- It's not my fault.
- You shouldn't be
allowed to drive.
- Every car has
faulty speedometers.
If anything, it's the car's
fault that I was speeding,
'cause it was doing...
- Yeah, sure,
that's sound logic.
- What's your
embarrassing story?
- You know what?
I'll show you.
- Oh, okay.
- I present to
you the cardipant.
- You look ridiculous.
- Oh, couture ridiculous.
- No, this is definitely more
embarrassing than my thing.
- No.
I'm not wholly
responsible for this.
There was a whole
team of people,
whereas you...
- I'm sorry.
No, that was 15 years ago.
When did you say yes to this?
Willingly shoot this?
- Yes, mine's worse.
- Okay, next.
Ah, biggest regret.
Easy.
Year 12 formal dress.
Not as impractical
as the cardipant,
but definitely a bit too
adventurous for the class of '01.
Yours?
- Hm.
Okay, biggest regret.
I collapsed on a shoot.
I'd been working
non-stop for 20 years
and I wasn't looking
after myself.
Ended up in Emergency.
- Oh, shit.
I'm sorry.
- No, no, it's okay.
It had to happen.
But you know, it
forced me to slow down
and reprioritise my life,
and spend some more
time with my son.
I can't believe you'd just
come out with it casually,
like you're talking
about the weather.
What else haven't you told me?
- Ah, what do you mean?
- Are you married?
- No.
- How old is your son?
- Ah, he's 15.
- Why did you lie to me?
I mean, what kind of a person...
- I didn't lie.
- Moves in with someone
and doesn't tell them
that they have a son.
What were you expecting, Peter?
That we would just
be here in my house
and play happy
family with your kid?
Why is this here?
- Okay, I'm sorry.
I thought that they'd
be out of the way.
- I knew it.
I knew this was too
good to be true.
- Clara, I'm sorry.
I planned to tell
you several times.
I am trying to talk to you now.
Where are you going?
- I'm going to pick up
my dead mother's ashes.
Hey.
Where are you?
Get ready, I'm going
to pick you up.
Now.
You okay?
- Yep.
I don't know.
- No.
I've only got two left.
- What's wrong with you?
- Peter has a kid.
- Right.
- That he didn't tell me about.
- Right.
- That's it?
No other reaction?
- Um...
Oh, my god, Clara,
what'd the police say?
Tell me, please.
- Shut up.
Mom was right.
You should never back
the shiniest horse.
Always go for the
tired, dependable horse.
Then you know what
you're getting.
Are you even listening to me?
- Yeah.
You're talking about horses.
- No, it's a metaphor.
For the fact that I never
choose the right men.
- Yeah, but who cares
if he has a kid?
- I don't care
about the kid part.
I care about the lying part.
Yeah, this is it.
Charming name.
It's 8:58 for fuck's sake.
- Jesus.
- We've come to
pick up our mother's ashes.
- Of course.
Sorry for your loss.
- Okay, thanks, yeah.
Her name's Christine Mathieson.
- I don't know why
I have to be here.
- Well, she's your mom too.
- Did you make an appointment?
- Did we need to?
- An appointment to pick
up our dead mother's ashes.
- It's standard procedure.
In the email...
- Yeah, well is there any way
that we can just
pick her up now?
- Not sure.
Um, my dad's out
at the moment...
- So in the email, it said
that everything's ready,
so would her ashes
be here or not?
- Yes.
All cremains remain
on the premises,
but notice to collect
is usually required.
- I'm sorry, did you
just say cremains?
- Yes.
Cremated remains.
Cremains.
- Jesus Christ.
- Can we, can you please
just go and find them?
- I'll see what I can do.
- Why couldn't Dad
have done this himself,
instead of taking
a fucking holiday?
- Would you chill so we
can get this over with?
- You chill.
- Okay, I think this is the one.
- I'm sorry, did you just say,
"You think," this is our mother?
- Can you please fill
out her release form?
- Yeah, I'll do that.
Ah, what if we don't know where
we're spreading the ashes?
- Well we don't really know if
these are our mother's ashes,
do we, so...
- Ah, just list a ballpark
place, if you don't mind.
It's procedure.
Ah, do you have a
permit for that park?
- Um, no.
- 'Cause you can't just
spread ashes at a park
without a permit.
- Oh, then, yes,
we have a permit.
- Okay, then.
- Absolutely.
- Oh, my god.
- Okay.
All done.
- I'm not touching that.
No.
- Sorry about him.
- That's fine.
- Oh, it's heavy.
Thanks.
- See you later.
- Hope not.
Thank you.
Thanks for coming.
You can come with me
to the airport tomorrow
to pick up Dad if you want.
- Brilliant.
You smoking again?
That's so unhealthy, Clara.
- Oh, please, tell me
more about health fads.
- Ell wants me to go away
with her to the coast.
In a Kombi van.
- Seriously?
- Yeah.
- Don't you think you
two are a little bit too,
I don't know, different?
- I mean, opposites
attract, you know.
- Right.
- We're in love.
She's it, I reckon.
- Oh, come on.
How can you possibly know that?
You're too young.
- Mom and Dad were young.
- Mom and Dad got married
young and fought for 40 years.
- No, they didn't.
- Hardly the best example.
- No.
- Yeah, they did.
- They were soulmates.
- Oh.
- Oh, yeah, great.
Classy, Clara.
- I'm sorry.
I'll put it out in Mom's
cremains next time, will I?
- For fuck's sake.
- What?
- What is wrong with you?
- It's a joke.
- No, it isn't.
- I'm sorry.
Sorry.
I'm just, I'm not good at...
I'm grieving too, you know.
- I think about
her all the time.
Like every second of every day.
- Come on.
I'll take you home.
- Thanks.
- What's that?
Mom said if you want shotgun,
you've gotta race her.
- And here is your wife, sir.
- Oh, I'm sorry, Vikash,
I'm not his wife, actually.
- My apologies.
- Sorry.
- And I think maybe
separate tables today.
- Of course.
- Sorry.
Popular time.
There you go.
Bon appetit.
- Thank you.
I guess you need
a bit of flavor...
- Thank you, but I'm
eating an apple danish.
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
- Well, here's cheers.
- Oh, look...
I shouldn't have
kissed you last night.
No, you're right.
- No, no, no.
- No.
You're right, it was too much.
And I know that I
suggested friends
but I don't think I can do that.
I'm very attracted to you.
So I don't think
we can be friends.
And I'm very sorry.
- Hey.
- Actually, I will
order a cocktail.
- What can I get for you?
- Don't know its name but it has
vodka, cranberry
and peach in it.
- Sex on the Beach.
- Pardon?
- The cocktail.
- Oh, that's what it's called?
- Yeah.
- Kelly, could I get
a Sex on the Beach
for the gentlemen, please.
- I wanna go with you.
- Wait, what?
- Whatever you want, okay?
I mean, I love you.
Look.
Look.
What?
Hey?
You okay?
What's wrong?
What is it?
- I slept with
someone last night.
- Hi.
- Oh, hey.
- Oh, I've just had a massage.
I want to get all the
inclusions in before I leave.
- Yeah, that's lovely.
Sorry.
- Thanks.
- I'm so, so sorry
about last night.
- Yeah, I'm sorry too.
- No, you
don't have to be.
- But I am.
- Okay.
- Okay.
- You're absolutely glorious.
- So are you.
- Are you even sure
he's on this flight?
- He printed out the
itinerary for me, Aaron.
Chill.
- You chill.
Well, did you call him much?
- No, he called me
a couple of times.
You?
- No.
Ah.
- There he is.
Is that Dad?
- Oh, my-my kids are here.
- What?
- My kids are here.
- Did you know they were coming?
- No, no.
They've obviously
come to pick me up.