Love, Death & Robots (2019–…): Season 1, Episode 16 - Ice Age - full transcript
A young couple moves into an apartment and finds a lost civilization inside their antique freezer.
[bottles clinking]
Hey, where do you want the wine?
[woman] In here, please.
Can you believe the landlord left
that funky refrigerator in here?
[laughs]
You know, these old-timey fridges,
they're actually, like, really smart.
In modern refrigerators,
they don't have one of these, you know.
The motor's underneath...
so the hot air rises up into the fridge
and has to be pumped out
by the same motor that produced it.
I mean, it's, like, crazy.
Yeah, that's insane.
Hey, want some?
Oh, yeah. You know what?
There might be some ice in here.
[woman] You know what I love about you?
Your class.
It's like a fucking Fortress of Solitude.
[ice rattles in glass]
- To all the sex we're gonna have...
- To all the good times...
- What I meant to say.
- ...we're gonna have...
- in our new place.
- Yeah.
[whimsical fantasy music plays]
- What the hell?
- What is it?
Gail, I want you to look inside this
ice cube and tell me what you see.
Is that...
[gasps]
I think I have
a magnifying glass somewhere.
- [Gail] Are those spears in its side?
- [man] What?
I wonder if there's more of these things
in the freezer.
Oh, my God.
Holy shit!
There's a lost civilization
in our refrigerator.
[Gail] Uh-huh.
[soaring orchestral music plays]
[high-pitched chattering]
[cowbell clanks]
[ethereal electronic music plays]
This makes no sense.
- You think?
- Yeah.
That's clearly an early medieval city.
Yeah?
[sighs] I mean, come on, everyone knows
that woolly mammoths died out
some time in the late Neolithic period.
Yeah, everyone knows that.
[sighs]
[Gail sighs]
Well, it'll make good fertilizer?
[sighs] Too soon.
[Gail] Let's check again.
Damn! We only looked away,
like, ten minutes.
[Gail] The time rate in there
must be different.
Decades have gone by.
It's the Industrial Revolution already.
- Aww, we missed the Renaissance.
- Oh, bummer.
[Rob] I wonder if we're their gods?
[man 1] Who are these two douchebags
starin' at us all day?
[man 2] I don't know. I'm tired
of looking at that broccoli in her teeth.
Yeah, I doubt it.
[whirring]
[Rob] What's that?
- Oh, I think those are airplanes.
- Huh.
Yeah, no, I think
they've reached the present.
Oh, my God. Look at that!
They've got a Starbucks.
- No way.
- Those really are everywhere.
What's going on over there?
Oh, fuck!
- Fuck!
- [Gail] Are you okay?
[Rob] It's like I'm blinded.
- Are you okay?
- They're fighting a war in there!
- [distant screaming]
- [Gail] Calm down.
Tactical nukes are going off
in our refrigerator
and you want me to calm down?
- [distant screaming]
- [gunfire]
[chuckles] I'm sorry,
you should see your face. It's...
- [distant gunfire]
- What's wrong?
Um...
- Oh.
- Yeah.
[distant screaming]
- Jeez.
- [distant gunfire and explosions]
- It looks like it's escalating.
- [somber music plays]
[sighs]
We can't expect them to outgrow war
in a couple of minutes.
So, what are we gonna do?
Order out for pizza.
It's been over an hour.
Maybe they've had a chance to rebuild.
Rob...
we have to face the possibility
that they...
[sighs]
well, that they didn't make it.
[sighs] Yeah.
- Holy shit. They made it!
- [laughs] They did.
[futuristic music plays]
Are those flying cars?
It looks like the Emerald City,
only, you know, less emerald.
Right. [laughs]
It's beautiful.
Okay, honestly,
that one looks a bit phallic, you know.
Like a dildo, yeah.
[Rob] I guess they went through
a little bit of a pyramid phase.
- That's a lot of bridges.
- [laughs]
- [Rob] Oh, boy.
- [Gail] Whoa.
What? [laughs]
Holy shit.
[triumphant orchestral music plays]
[crickets chirping]
Huh.
Yeah.
Do you think they're coming back?
No, I don't think so.
[motor running]
[motor fan stops]
- We can clean it out in the morning.
- Yeah.
[door thud echoes]
[birds chirping]
[distant drumming]
[menacing drum music plays]
[roaring]
Hey, where do you want the wine?
[woman] In here, please.
Can you believe the landlord left
that funky refrigerator in here?
[laughs]
You know, these old-timey fridges,
they're actually, like, really smart.
In modern refrigerators,
they don't have one of these, you know.
The motor's underneath...
so the hot air rises up into the fridge
and has to be pumped out
by the same motor that produced it.
I mean, it's, like, crazy.
Yeah, that's insane.
Hey, want some?
Oh, yeah. You know what?
There might be some ice in here.
[woman] You know what I love about you?
Your class.
It's like a fucking Fortress of Solitude.
[ice rattles in glass]
- To all the sex we're gonna have...
- To all the good times...
- What I meant to say.
- ...we're gonna have...
- in our new place.
- Yeah.
[whimsical fantasy music plays]
- What the hell?
- What is it?
Gail, I want you to look inside this
ice cube and tell me what you see.
Is that...
[gasps]
I think I have
a magnifying glass somewhere.
- [Gail] Are those spears in its side?
- [man] What?
I wonder if there's more of these things
in the freezer.
Oh, my God.
Holy shit!
There's a lost civilization
in our refrigerator.
[Gail] Uh-huh.
[soaring orchestral music plays]
[high-pitched chattering]
[cowbell clanks]
[ethereal electronic music plays]
This makes no sense.
- You think?
- Yeah.
That's clearly an early medieval city.
Yeah?
[sighs] I mean, come on, everyone knows
that woolly mammoths died out
some time in the late Neolithic period.
Yeah, everyone knows that.
[sighs]
[Gail sighs]
Well, it'll make good fertilizer?
[sighs] Too soon.
[Gail] Let's check again.
Damn! We only looked away,
like, ten minutes.
[Gail] The time rate in there
must be different.
Decades have gone by.
It's the Industrial Revolution already.
- Aww, we missed the Renaissance.
- Oh, bummer.
[Rob] I wonder if we're their gods?
[man 1] Who are these two douchebags
starin' at us all day?
[man 2] I don't know. I'm tired
of looking at that broccoli in her teeth.
Yeah, I doubt it.
[whirring]
[Rob] What's that?
- Oh, I think those are airplanes.
- Huh.
Yeah, no, I think
they've reached the present.
Oh, my God. Look at that!
They've got a Starbucks.
- No way.
- Those really are everywhere.
What's going on over there?
Oh, fuck!
- Fuck!
- [Gail] Are you okay?
[Rob] It's like I'm blinded.
- Are you okay?
- They're fighting a war in there!
- [distant screaming]
- [Gail] Calm down.
Tactical nukes are going off
in our refrigerator
and you want me to calm down?
- [distant screaming]
- [gunfire]
[chuckles] I'm sorry,
you should see your face. It's...
- [distant gunfire]
- What's wrong?
Um...
- Oh.
- Yeah.
[distant screaming]
- Jeez.
- [distant gunfire and explosions]
- It looks like it's escalating.
- [somber music plays]
[sighs]
We can't expect them to outgrow war
in a couple of minutes.
So, what are we gonna do?
Order out for pizza.
It's been over an hour.
Maybe they've had a chance to rebuild.
Rob...
we have to face the possibility
that they...
[sighs]
well, that they didn't make it.
[sighs] Yeah.
- Holy shit. They made it!
- [laughs] They did.
[futuristic music plays]
Are those flying cars?
It looks like the Emerald City,
only, you know, less emerald.
Right. [laughs]
It's beautiful.
Okay, honestly,
that one looks a bit phallic, you know.
Like a dildo, yeah.
[Rob] I guess they went through
a little bit of a pyramid phase.
- That's a lot of bridges.
- [laughs]
- [Rob] Oh, boy.
- [Gail] Whoa.
What? [laughs]
Holy shit.
[triumphant orchestral music plays]
[crickets chirping]
Huh.
Yeah.
Do you think they're coming back?
No, I don't think so.
[motor running]
[motor fan stops]
- We can clean it out in the morning.
- Yeah.
[door thud echoes]
[birds chirping]
[distant drumming]
[menacing drum music plays]
[roaring]