Lost Man Found (2022–…): Season 1, Episode 3 - Episode #1.3 - full transcript
Wait a minute. Did I read this right?
You really became a chauffeur overnight?
Not only that, but for Haruka Igawa?
That's more than good luck,
it's another coincidence.
It was my dream, after all,
to be a taxi driver.
CHAPTER THREE
But why did they choose
an aspiring actor like you
to be Igawa's driver?
I can only call it destiny.
Starting today, you're a driver.
-Over here.
-Wait, what?
-Come on. Hurry. The boss will explain.
-A driver?
A driver. Go on.
You want me to drive?
It can't be helped.
No one else has a license.
I just wasn't prepared for Haru
to get this popular.
This is for you.
-It's pretty thick.
-It's your first real paycheck, right?
You'll be on salary from now on.
One more thing.
We want you to act as her bodyguard too.
You saw that movie, right?
The one with Kevin Costner?
It'll be like that.
Seriously?
That doesn't sound like destiny to me.
More like desperation.
Patience. The destiny part comes later.
Satoru.
Whoa, you startled me!
What are you doing here?
-Don't make up any weird stories.
-Huh?
-I'd only trust about 1/10th of it.
-Wait a second.
He was never anything more than my driver.
-Right...
-Huh?
-Bye!
-Ms. Igawa, over here!
Hey, wait!
Come on, you know I wouldn't lie!
She slides in and out like it's
the most natural thing in the world!
-Who'd have thought!
-I call her "Who'd have thought" Haruka.
YEAR 2002
Back then, she was
everywhere you looked...
The queen of the "soothing-type" models.
Everyone wanted a piece of her.
Chauffeuring was no easy feat!
I told you to confirm
the route in advance, didn't I?
What are we paying you for?
To drive!
It's more than just dropping her off.
She uses this time
to rest or learn her lines.
Why do you think I had
you switch to a bigger car?
Hello, this is Hitachi.
-Thank you for calling.
-Enough.
-I'll never learn this!
-Haruka's next month?
-It's impossible!
-Ms. Igawa!
-Ms. Haruka!
-Yeah, what?
Um, it's a bit late in the game, but...
I think that's the wrong script.
-What?
-It's an old one.
-Huh?
-From your last movie.
-Of course!
-Ah! So that's why...
I knew I'd heard these lines before.
-Why didn't you say so sooner?
-Sorry.
And another thing,
don't use her real name out in public.
Think of a codename or something!
A codename...
I've got it!
-Ms. Haruko has arrived!
-Okay, thanks!
-This way, Ms. Igawa.
-Thank you.
Codename: Haruko.
It felt like a Mission Impossible movie
and I dedicated myself to protecting
the Queen of the soothing models.
This is the story of a lost man
who is destined to be found
again and again.
It's a TV drama,
based on one hell of a true story,
but the names of characters
and organizations who appear
have mostly been changed.
-These are from Ms. Haruko, for the crew.
-Thank you.
Snacks from Ms. Haruko. Enjoy!
These are from Ms. Haruko. Enjoy!
Could you hold this for me? Thank you.
Look, you don't have
to hand them out one by one.
Everyone's busy. Let them help themselves.
-Snacks from Ms. Haruko.
-Are you listening?
Tell me something, though.
Why do you keep calling her
Haruko instead of Haruka?
My grandmother calls her Haruko,
so I guess I picked it up by habit
or it's a form of filial piety.
And I have Mr. Haruko's number
on my phone under my brother's name.
-See? Takeshi Matsudo.
-Whoa! Hold it!
You wouldn't really
leak her number, right?
-Sorry.
-I guess it's confidential.
We're ready for a dry run!
Please make your way inside.
-Here we go!
-Here we go!
-Ow!
-Break a leg.
Whoa, there. Do you think
you're part of the cast or something?
You're her chauffeur. Know your place!
Ma'am, I'm afraid the culprit isn't here.
Why don't you believe me?
The police have eyes on everything.
There's no need to worry.
I'm sure the killer is watching me!
Even now, as we talk.
-You're in the way!
-His gaze...
I can feel him staring!
I'm so frightened!
Okay!
Isn't that something?
Even when you act scared, it's soothing.
-Her presence is so soothing!
-It sure is!
Yeah. She's a rare breed, isn't she?
-What is wrong with you?
-Okay! Next take!
Move it!
Ms. Haruko really was incredibly busy.
TV dramas, commercials,
radio, magazine interviews...
Her schedule
literally moved by the minute.
-Open the damn door!
-Got it!
-We're down to five minutes!
-Dear...
If you go abroad...
Forget it! I'll get out here!
-Wait, what?
-Left turn up there, right?
-But in reality, the soothing Queen...
-Wait! Ms. Igawa!
...was surprisingly hot-blooded
and always full of energy.
Was that Haruka Igawa?
She runs pretty fast! Who'd have thought!
THE RUGGED PYRRHUS
HAMLET, ACT TWO, SCENE TWO
"The rugged Pyrrhus, he whose sable arms,
black as his purpose,
did the night resemble."
Speak more from your diaphragm! Again!
It was more than just work.
She never missed a lesson, either.
-...Black as his purpose...
-Remember, this is Shakespeare!
...did the night resemble."
Boy, I am tired.
What's it all about, anyway?
That "rugged Pyrrhus" thing...
Don't ask me!
-Shakespeare? Really?
-Right?
This is a nice song.
-Right?
-Yeah!
I figured you'd like this kind of music.
It's, you know, soothing...
Does everyone really want
to be "soothed" that much?
I guess so.
You know, now that I think about it,
I must be the most soothed
man in all of Japan, right now.
I've got negative ions
aimed right at my back!
Give me a break.
-Maybe I should just quit.
-You can't do that!
If you quit, who will be left
to soothe the nation?
So what if I don't soothe anyone?
What are you gonna do, sue me?
That's a good one.
Better than Master Koraku, even!
No pun intended.
Well, you know, who'd have thought
you were the type.
I'm sick of hearing
"who'd have thought," too.
That should be your new name.
"Who'd have thought Haruka."
Any time someone says it...
"That's my name, don't wear it out."
"Who'd have thought..."
Oh, you make sure you thank Sugiura, okay?
Good music in the car
is all I have to look forward to.
"I often listen to this
at the end of a long day."
"Good work again, today."
I heard Sugiura was attending art school.
She had style, looks,
and an aura of cool beauty.
But that only accentuated her smile.
-Welcome.
-I'm returning this.
Oh, right.
Ms. Haruko was really happy.
She looks forward to the music all day.
Really?
I'm glad to hear it.
You're soothing the queen
of the soothing models, Sugiura.
What's that make you?
"The Soothing Sorceress"!
Come on...
There must be a way I can pay you back.
-Huh?
-After all your selections.
You don't have to pay me back.
I like playing DJ.
But if you spend every day
with someone so pretty,
you'll spoil your eyes.
Don't be silly. After all...
you're quite pretty yourself.
Welcome.
You've got it wrong.
I just came to rent CDs.
Don't fall for her.
I told you!
I just came to rent CDs.
Everyone's talking about it.
Ever since Sugiura started working here,
you've done nothing but rent CDs.
He's right. You haven't rented
any Haruhiko Arai.
I'm just doing
what's in my job description.
In truth, she's not my type.
Artistic girls like her make me nervous.
Please!
You've never met a girl
who's not your type.
DON'T PUSH YOURSELF TOO HARD.
I'M ROOTING FOR YOU.
"For as long as I live,
I will curse your name."
"Parentheses, sobs quietly."
Would I really sob quietly?
-Ms. Igawa, we're ready!
-Oh, right.
We're rolling! And...
Action!
I won't ever forgive the killer.
Until the day I die...
For the rest of my life,
I will curse his name!
Well...
How can I put it...
Who'd have thought you could be
so intense when you're angry?
But could we try a little more like usual?
Another take, but a little more reserved.
Yeah, but... I feel like...
How can I put it?
I think my character's hatred
is deeper than that.
There! Just like that!
I guess her hatred is deep,
but these days,
everyone just wants to be soothed.
Even with horror movies.
Okay! Let's give it another go!
Right.
All of Japan wanted her to soothe them.
Well, it's sure soothing for me.
She can say what she wants,
but her voice, her eyes,
her lips...
Oh, and the way she tilts
her head like this.
I was convinced
she was doing it on purpose.
You'd be surprised, though.
She's actually pretty hot-blooded.
Really? Huh.
Who'd have thought.
But then, I guess the public
puts everyone in a box.
Look at me.
I think of my movies as entertainment,
but if I actually shot one,
I bet people would call it arty.
Like, I might put the brakes on myself
so I won't be able to shoot.
Who needs them?
Brakes, that is.
Mr. Arita! Where did you come from?
But then...
I can't believe you're the chauffeur
for Haruka Igawa, Matsudo.
Do you think you could convince her
to appear in my directorial debut?
Even for a second? As a favor?
Right?
Oh, speak of the devil.
"Takeshi Matsudo"?
It's Ms. Haruko.
Oh, Ms. Igawa.
-Huh?
-That's her codename.
-Codename?
-Hello?
Good evening!
I was just eating dinner.
Tomorrow? I'm off, tomorrow.
Omotesando?
Of course, I'll go along with you!
What's going on? That sounds like a date!
Hello? This is Takeshi Matsudo.
Behind you.
Sorry. Did you wait long?
-No, I just got here.
-Really?
Today, I'm going shopping.
-I'm taking up your whole day.
-Huh?
Oh! Thai food?
-This place is pretty good!
-I see.
It does look good.
-What should I get?
-Our next match...
-Satoru! Over here!
-Huh?
Back here.
Making her way to the ring...
-Miyuki Takase!
-What is this?
Whoo!
What's this place doing here?!
Whoa!
What's going on?
Entering the ring, Madeline!
And her opponent, Ayako Sato!
Ayako! Come on, Ayako!
Come on!
Get her!
Look out!
-Ayako!
-Ayako!
-Ayako!
-Ayako!
Whoa!
Put that down!
One,
two,
three!
Alright!
-She won!
-She won!
Thank you very much!
Thanks to all of you.
So you soothe yourself with pro wrestling?
It's not for soothing.
How can I put it...
It gets me pumped up!
You really are hot-blooded.
Well, you know...
My grandma was a big Giant Baba fan.
-Excuse me, here's our order.
-Coming up.
As I watched with her,
I fell in love
with a wrestler called Gypsy Joe.
I got really into it!
I see...
No matter how many times
they hit him with a chair,
he'd get back up and be just fine!
In fact, the chair looked worse than him!
It sent a chill down my spine.
-Thank you for waiting.
-Thank you.
Thanks...
So I decided that I wanted
to be strong like him.
Who'd have thought? Oh! Sorry!
Tell me Satoru.
Why do you want to be an actor?
Well... in my case...
-I'm no different from you.
-Huh?
I saw a play in high school
and a chill went down my spine.
Wow. What kind of actor do you want to be?
Well... In terms of my taste...
I like Akira Emo...
Mr. Akira Emoto. Or outside Japan...
There's an actor named Crispin Glover.
I really like his work.
I see. Never heard of him. What's he like?
You've seen Back to the Future, right?
He was Michael J Fox's father.
He's so funny in that.
Really... I see.
It's people like you
who are meant to be actors.
What about you?
-I--
-Thank you for waiting.
-Here's your Khao Man Gai special.
-Huh?
-Here you go.
-Yes!
It's really big!
This looks great.
Thank you for the meal!
Thank you!
Come again.
Hold your fist like this.
That must be nice.
-Okay.
-Say cheese!
I wish I could be like them.
-Another one.
-Okay!
Say cheese!
Thank you very much!
-Oh, here it is!
-Nice.
Thank you so much.
With you here,
there's no song I can't find.
By the way, that's the entrance music
for the wrestler Gypsy Joe.
You know, I think we have a video too.
Entering the ring, Gypsy Joe!
What the hell? This is great!
Can I rent this? Ms. Haruko would love it!
Well...
Maybe you can...
pay me back, Matsudo.
I ALWAYS LISTEN TO THIS...
Sugiura!
I'm really sorry!
I, uh...
Ms. Haruko was running late and...
Please forgive me!
We're too late for Mulholland Drive, now.
-Sorry!
-It's okay.
Would you mind a different movie?
I have a Pia magazine.
I'll look at the schedules.
Sure.
What about this?
CHINPIRA HIGHWAY 4: THE HIROSHIMA CHAPTER
That'll do fine.
Let's go, then!
Man, that was one awful movie.
The acting and the direction...
I feel really bad, so dinner's on me.
It's fine. We'll split.
I actually liked it.
Really? You did?
Well, I guess there were some good points.
Oh! That's right! The CD!
This one.
Gypsy Joe...
Ms. Haruko was thrilled.
I thought she might
put me in a wrestling hold.
It's probably...
not the music.
I'll bet it's fun just being with you.
For Ms. Igawa, that is.
Huh?
What does that mean?
What are you trying to say?
Nothing.
I meant exactly that.
I can't help but feel a little jealous.
Huh?
Don't tell me...
What? Usually, this is the point where
I'd get the wrong idea and ask her out.
But being called a friend again is just...
-Let's be friends!
-Too scary!
We're just friends though!
Say, Sugiura.
What?
Um...
There's a rumor...
going around the rental shop
that I have a crush on you.
Have you heard?
Not a thing.
It's really awkward, right?
I'll bet it's Nakata who started it.
But so you know...
That's not my intention.
So don't worry, okay?
We're um...
We're just friends.
Just friends!
But it was good to make that clear, right?
It's important.
But still...
we're friends but...
pretty good friends, right?
Wait...
Huh? What...
You're bleeding.
I'm leaving!
What? But why?
PRO WRESTLING STRONGEST HIT SONGS
Sugiura...
quit.
What?
You didn't do anything
weird to her, did you?
No more love confessions, right?
I didn't confess a thing!
All I did was say we're friends.
What the hell do you mean "friends"?
You are such a creep!
How many female staff members
do you plan to scare away, huh?
-I'll backdrop you myself!
-Backdrop?
She promised she'd work until her test!
Test?
PRO WRESTLING STRONGEST HIT SONGS
"I always listen to this
when I'm battling something."
"It's the bell
for the championship round!"
"Can't afford to lose."
I'll bet Sugiura
thought I had feelings
for you or something.
Why would she...
How am I supposed to know that
if she doesn't say so?
You're an actor, aren't you?
You have to learn to read
people's faces or body language!
Ah!
Oh, no!
What do I do now?
Are you okay?
If it was just you, you could drive off
a cliff or hit a tanker for all I care!
But I told you
a thousand times to be careful
when Ms. Igawa is with you!
I'm sorry.
If it happens again, the repair cost
will be docked
from your paycheck, Mr. Driver.
Understood.
I told you, we should put out
an urgent ad for a driver.
Igawa's already overworked
and if anything else happens we'll...
You have a point.
But I'd like you...
to do it a little longer.
What?
That's right! It's not all bad news
for our driver, is it?
I can't believe you're making me say this.
A prisoner role.
What? Work for me?
You're playing an inmate
at a Yokohama prison.
Huh?
I've dreamed of working
with this director!
The other day,
a casting director spotted you
during Haruka's shoot.
They said you looked like an inmate.
But they have a point. I'll bet there are
potato faces in prison, too.
Thank you very much! Thank you!
Thank you!
I can't believe your luck.
No pay for your chauffeur work
during the shoot. Got it?
Way to go, Satoru! A prisoner role, huh?
I wonder what you did to get arrested.
Well...
They told me to think up
my own back story.
Really?
I'm already trembling.
Half with excitement, though.
I'll bet you never get nervous, do you?
You always look like you're having fun.
But that's a talent too, I guess.
Well, I am having fun.
I felt pressure
being a chauffeur early on,
but after bumping a lot, I got used to it.
I get to meet lots of actors...
And this role, too, only fell my way
because I've been driving you.
If this is how it is,
I'd love to be your chauffeur forever.
Why not give up acting altogether?
What?
Huh? Oh, sorry I...
You know, it's just that you...
It sometimes irritates me
how much you enjoy things.
I realize now how much
I've been putting up with everything.
Huh?
I've pretended not to notice
the way things bother me.
Wait. Hold on a second.
So it's not your fault.
Oh, she's just reading her lines...
"So go out
and find happiness for yourself."
That gave me a scare.
You don't have to hit him hard. Okay.
You hit him and... good.
Okay, everybody! Go!
All of you!
Stop!
Stop! Get off of him!
Back off! Everyone!
Get in line! Now!
You there!
What's going on?
Straight ahead.
-Look straight ahead!
-Why, after all this time...
I couldn't forgive him.
Don't turn your head!
Don't turn your heads!
Please... open your eyes!
Okay, cut!
Okay, that's good.
That's all for rehearsal!
-Are you okay?
-I'm fine!
Everyone this way!
When we're rolling,
I'll go harder. So don't move.
-Yes, sir.
-If you move...
my hand will hit your ears
and you could burst an eardrum.
-Understood.
-Be careful.
-Understood.
-Okay, here comes a take!
-Break a leg.
-Thanks.
-They're tasty.
-Thank you.
-Have some.
-Thanks.
-Have some. Glad the weather's cleared.
-Right.
You from Kansai, kid?
Yes. From Hyogo.
I'm from Nishinomiya.
-What? For real?
-Yeah.
Me too. I lived right by the Muko river.
-Really?
-Yeah.
-What junior high?
-Um, Nishi Junior high.
No way! We went to the same school!
-You mean it?
-What a coincidence.
-Were you in a club?
-I played rugby.
-No way!
-For real?
-Incredible!
-You're my senior!
I am! I played rugby too!
-An alumni!
-Are they any good these days?
Not so much, these days.
I realize now how much
I've been putting up with everything.
I pretended not to notice
the way things bother me.
-So--
-Cut!
Cut!
Ms. Igawa...
Do you think you could
tilt your head 45 degrees?
"Silly me." Like that.
I bet that will be more soothing.
Please.
Okay, take two. Roll film.
Quiet on the set!
We're rolling!
Stand by! And...
Action!
Without you, Nami, I...
I realize now that--
-Cut!
-Ms. Igawa!
Just a little more.
"Silly me." Like this.
Excuse me, but...
Who exactly am I soothing in this scene?
Me!
You're soothing me!
One more time.
Okay, take three!
-Roll film!
-Quiet on the set!
We're rolling!
And... action!
Without you, Nami, I...
I...
I...
How much do you expect me to take?
I'm not your damn maid!
You can't treat me like this!
It's about time you learned to take care
of yourself! How old are you?
Are you a two-year-old?
What shall we do?
I thought it might be interesting
if I got a bit angrier.
What do you think? No good?
Sorry, everybody!
One more time! Over here!
-Okay, we're ready for take one.
-Roll film!
Quiet on the set.
And... action!
Stop! Get off him!
Get off him now!
-Back to work!
-Let go!
Stop this, now! All of you!
Get in line! Now!
You there!
What's going on?
Why, after all this time...
I just couldn't forgive him.
Please!
Open your eyes!
And, cut!
Um, didn't you just hit the wrong guy?
Oh, I'm sorry!
I got mixed up.
Me and this kid were talking
during the break and...
-Right? Another take?
-Yeah.
No, it's fine.
Yeah. Okay, everybody!
-Okay, ready for the next scene!
-Lucky you.
You got a closeup.
-Thank you very much!
-That looked pretty good!
-Thanks, kid.
-No, thank you.
-Good work folks!
-This way!
That was a shock...
You made a face for the ages!
-Man...
-Good for you.
-When you've got it, you've got it.
-Well...
Some people have all the luck.
You sure make me jealous!
Maybe I had a weird aura or something.
You might be right.
-It kinda hurt, though.
-I'll bet.
I've been practicing my reaction
for that scene
since the day of my audition.
You may have good luck,
but your acting sucks.
Don't think you can get by
with expressions like that.
Just ignore him.
Luck is a skill too.
Your expression was pretty odd, though.
That was so much fun!
Everyone had these blank stares...
Like this.
Ms. Hitachi's was the funniest of all!
All I did was say what I really think.
But then, no one cares
who I really am, do they?
I'm thinking of quitting.
There are plenty of people
who could replace me.
All I do is tilt my head...
Plus, it makes my shoulders stiff.
That's...
That won't do.
Why?
Well...
when it comes to me...
There are not only replacements,
they're probably better!
There's no one
who could replace you, Ms. Haruka.
Sure there is.
-There isn't.
-There is.
-There isn't.
-There is!
-There isn't!
-There is!
There isn't.
There is.
-There isn't.
-I said there is!
-There isn't!
-There is!
There isn't!
The kid's hopeless.
Whether he falls in love
or someone falls for him,
it makes no difference.
He'll go his whole life without a girl.
You or Yoshimira should date him,
Ms. Yamashita.
He's not my type. He comes on too strong.
-Oh, welcome home!
-Look who it is!
We were just talking--
Huh? A guest? Come on in.
Sorry it's so cramped.
Hang on, I'll clear a space,
We were just holding
a griping session about you.
Come on, sit down.
Sit down, I said.
Oh, your guest too. Have a seat.
Matsudo...
You...
You chose Haruka Igawa over Sugiura?
What's wrong with you!
Doesn't it strike you as odd?
I mean, when was the last time
you looked in the mirr--
What?
It's her, right?
You're Haruka Igawa, aren't you?
This is Ms. Igawa.
I'm Igawa.
Huh? Th-The real thing? Why?
She came in like it was
the most natural thing in the world.
And she's still here.
Tell her, Tsukamoto.
Tell Haruko what you like about her.
-Huh?
-Ms. Haruko...
This is my roommate, Tsukamoto,
but one day,
he'll be a major film director!
And he's a big fan of yours!
-Tell her, Tsukamoto.
-Tell her what?
What you said before!
About her eyes, her ears, and her lips!
-She's thinking of retiring!
-What? Retiring?
Y-You can't... you shouldn't retire.
Oh, excuse me.
I'm Tsukamoto. Tetsuo Tsukamoto.
My dream is...
happens to be
to make a movie with you as the star.
So if you were to retire,
I would automatically become a director
who never made their debut film.
Or rather...
I, uh, I have no idea what I'm saying.
-Tsukamoto!
-Right! Whatever the case,
I love you! Ms. Igawa!
Oh, uh...
Forgive me, but...
Sorry.
-Oh!
-Who's that?
Huh?
S-Sugiura?
What?
Oh, look. It's jerk-off.
-Wait... huh? Why...
-Yeah, why?
Don't think I came running here for you.
The CD you stole!
I just came to get it back.
Oh, look. Is it in here?
It's Gypsy Joe!
Well, now...
Seeing your face again has me
disgusted, so I'll cut to the chase.
You!
You're in love
with Haruka Igawa, aren't you?
That's a total misunderstanding, but...
W-What's with... Huh? What happened?
Why the sudden image change?
I haven't changed a thing!
This is the real me!
I passed my test to become a pro wrestler,
so from now on, I'll be living as a heel!
You deaf, punk?
Who are you?
You think you're hot stuff just
because you look a bit like Haruka Igawa.
What makes you soothing?
The soothing girl of the future...
will be someone hot-blooded like me!
Take that!
Here we go.
Ow!
One, two, three!
Alright!
This is my way of life!
-Come tomorrow, I'll live on!
-We'll live on!
-We'll live on!
-Yeah!
We'll live on!
You all too! Come on!
Help me!
Mercy! Mercy-mercy-mercy!
I can't! Someone help me!
"The rugged Pyrrhus."
-"The rugged Pyrrhus."
-"The rugged Pyrrhus."
-"The rugged Pyrrhus."
-"The rugged Pyrrhus."
"The rugged Pyrrhus."
"The rugged Pyrrhus,
-he whose sable arms,
-he whose sable arms,
-black as his purpose,
-black as his purpose,
-did the night resemble!
-did the night resemble!"
"When he lay couchèd in the ominous horse,
hath now this dread
and black complexion smear'd."
"With heraldry more dismal,
head to foot..."
Seriously? Oh, man...
Who'd have thought
I'd ever see her like this.
I'd have thought it!
She's an actress, after all.
I think the driver
has completed his mission.
"The rugged Pyrrhus,
he whose sable arms,
black as his purpose,
did the night resemble."
TWO MONTHS LATER
Stop! Get off him!
Stop this, now!
All of you!
Get in line!
You there.
What's going on?
Why, after all this time...
You may have good luck,
but your acting sucks.
Don't think you can get by
with expressions like that.
It's people like you
who are meant to be actors.
What's this? You thinking
of becoming an action star?
Mr. Hirayama.
How exactly do I improve my acting?
I was completely unprepared for that slap.
Yeah, that was pretty bad.
Huh?
You just have to live with purpose.
That's all there is.
The only preparation an actor needs.
If I recite that rugged Pyrrhus speech,
can I live with purpose?
Hell if I know.
What does it mean, anyway?
Hell if I know that either.
They drilled it into me in London.
But in my case...
it keeps me going.
The rugged Pyrrhus...
He whose sable arms
Black as his purpose
Did the night resemble
When he lay couchèd in the ominous horse
Hath now
This dread and black complexion smeared
With heraldry more dismal, head to foot
"Now is he total gules, horridly tricked,
with blood of fathers,
mothers, daughters, sons."
"Baked and impasted
with the parching streets
that lend a tyrannous and a damnèd light
to their lord's murder."
"Roasted in wrath and fire,
and thus o'ersized with coagulate gore."
"With eyes like carbuncles,
the hellish Pyrrhus
old grandsire Priam seeks."
EVERYONE NEEDS A LITTLE TEA TIME
Will this be a one-week rental?
No, three nights only, please.
Th-th-th-three nights!
-That'll be 370 yen!
-Here you are.
-Thank you very much!
-Thanks.
Shinya Tsukamoto...
STAFF RECOMMEND: THE FILMS
OF SHINYA TSUKAMOTO, TETSUO: THE IRON MAN
As usual, I was short on acting work
and I'd worked long enough at the store
that I started training new employees.
"Master back" means returning tapes
to the floor, starting with new releases.
This is our most important task.
Got it.
-Try it.
-Right.
Return... master back. That's right.
Return... Welcome!
Welcome!
It's okay. Just do as I do.
Welcome!
W-W-Welcome!
W-W-Welcome!
You pick up quickly!
Oh, thanks.
-Whoo! Welcome!
-Whoo! Welcome!
What's with her?
What are you doing over there?
-Oh, thanks for today.
-Sure.
-I'm feeling a bit tired.
-I see.
-Can I join you?
-Go ahead.
Those glasses look broken.
You are right.
I almost never stopped
to look at scenes like this,
but it felt strangely comfortable.
-Say, Higa... Were you a yanki in school?
-What?
-Me? No way!
-Oh, yeah?
I didn't go to high school,
but I wasn't a yanki.
But you were an actor, huh?
Um, yeah. In the present tense, though.
Wow! So you performed and stuff?
Um, yeah. Still do, though.
Sounds nice! I'd like to try.
Try what? Acting?
But I guess it's pretty hard, right?
I don't know if I'd call it hard...
Though she seemed like an oddball,
she might just be...
I'm sure you'll find someone
who is right for you.
These things are gross!
But that's a story for another time.
Tastes like crap.
-I'm quitting.
-Whoa!
Uh, I...
I'm going to commit seppuku!
And I will be your second.
Aieen!
Did I even say that right?
"Seppuku surude degozaru?"
Ever since I came to Tokyo,
I've had a lot more boogers.
When I'm with Higa,
I feel the need to straighten myself out.
That girl’s got a lot to deal with.
Your boyfriend's a boxer?
Th-this is more serious than I thought.
I couldn't take the final step!
Aren't we supposed to be his friends?
It's about time
I did something with my life too.
...At how we're all working
toward something.
Better finish it today.
I feel cold.
I'm in the middle of one
of the most important moments of my life.
Translated by Bradley Plumb
You really became a chauffeur overnight?
Not only that, but for Haruka Igawa?
That's more than good luck,
it's another coincidence.
It was my dream, after all,
to be a taxi driver.
CHAPTER THREE
But why did they choose
an aspiring actor like you
to be Igawa's driver?
I can only call it destiny.
Starting today, you're a driver.
-Over here.
-Wait, what?
-Come on. Hurry. The boss will explain.
-A driver?
A driver. Go on.
You want me to drive?
It can't be helped.
No one else has a license.
I just wasn't prepared for Haru
to get this popular.
This is for you.
-It's pretty thick.
-It's your first real paycheck, right?
You'll be on salary from now on.
One more thing.
We want you to act as her bodyguard too.
You saw that movie, right?
The one with Kevin Costner?
It'll be like that.
Seriously?
That doesn't sound like destiny to me.
More like desperation.
Patience. The destiny part comes later.
Satoru.
Whoa, you startled me!
What are you doing here?
-Don't make up any weird stories.
-Huh?
-I'd only trust about 1/10th of it.
-Wait a second.
He was never anything more than my driver.
-Right...
-Huh?
-Bye!
-Ms. Igawa, over here!
Hey, wait!
Come on, you know I wouldn't lie!
She slides in and out like it's
the most natural thing in the world!
-Who'd have thought!
-I call her "Who'd have thought" Haruka.
YEAR 2002
Back then, she was
everywhere you looked...
The queen of the "soothing-type" models.
Everyone wanted a piece of her.
Chauffeuring was no easy feat!
I told you to confirm
the route in advance, didn't I?
What are we paying you for?
To drive!
It's more than just dropping her off.
She uses this time
to rest or learn her lines.
Why do you think I had
you switch to a bigger car?
Hello, this is Hitachi.
-Thank you for calling.
-Enough.
-I'll never learn this!
-Haruka's next month?
-It's impossible!
-Ms. Igawa!
-Ms. Haruka!
-Yeah, what?
Um, it's a bit late in the game, but...
I think that's the wrong script.
-What?
-It's an old one.
-Huh?
-From your last movie.
-Of course!
-Ah! So that's why...
I knew I'd heard these lines before.
-Why didn't you say so sooner?
-Sorry.
And another thing,
don't use her real name out in public.
Think of a codename or something!
A codename...
I've got it!
-Ms. Haruko has arrived!
-Okay, thanks!
-This way, Ms. Igawa.
-Thank you.
Codename: Haruko.
It felt like a Mission Impossible movie
and I dedicated myself to protecting
the Queen of the soothing models.
This is the story of a lost man
who is destined to be found
again and again.
It's a TV drama,
based on one hell of a true story,
but the names of characters
and organizations who appear
have mostly been changed.
-These are from Ms. Haruko, for the crew.
-Thank you.
Snacks from Ms. Haruko. Enjoy!
These are from Ms. Haruko. Enjoy!
Could you hold this for me? Thank you.
Look, you don't have
to hand them out one by one.
Everyone's busy. Let them help themselves.
-Snacks from Ms. Haruko.
-Are you listening?
Tell me something, though.
Why do you keep calling her
Haruko instead of Haruka?
My grandmother calls her Haruko,
so I guess I picked it up by habit
or it's a form of filial piety.
And I have Mr. Haruko's number
on my phone under my brother's name.
-See? Takeshi Matsudo.
-Whoa! Hold it!
You wouldn't really
leak her number, right?
-Sorry.
-I guess it's confidential.
We're ready for a dry run!
Please make your way inside.
-Here we go!
-Here we go!
-Ow!
-Break a leg.
Whoa, there. Do you think
you're part of the cast or something?
You're her chauffeur. Know your place!
Ma'am, I'm afraid the culprit isn't here.
Why don't you believe me?
The police have eyes on everything.
There's no need to worry.
I'm sure the killer is watching me!
Even now, as we talk.
-You're in the way!
-His gaze...
I can feel him staring!
I'm so frightened!
Okay!
Isn't that something?
Even when you act scared, it's soothing.
-Her presence is so soothing!
-It sure is!
Yeah. She's a rare breed, isn't she?
-What is wrong with you?
-Okay! Next take!
Move it!
Ms. Haruko really was incredibly busy.
TV dramas, commercials,
radio, magazine interviews...
Her schedule
literally moved by the minute.
-Open the damn door!
-Got it!
-We're down to five minutes!
-Dear...
If you go abroad...
Forget it! I'll get out here!
-Wait, what?
-Left turn up there, right?
-But in reality, the soothing Queen...
-Wait! Ms. Igawa!
...was surprisingly hot-blooded
and always full of energy.
Was that Haruka Igawa?
She runs pretty fast! Who'd have thought!
THE RUGGED PYRRHUS
HAMLET, ACT TWO, SCENE TWO
"The rugged Pyrrhus, he whose sable arms,
black as his purpose,
did the night resemble."
Speak more from your diaphragm! Again!
It was more than just work.
She never missed a lesson, either.
-...Black as his purpose...
-Remember, this is Shakespeare!
...did the night resemble."
Boy, I am tired.
What's it all about, anyway?
That "rugged Pyrrhus" thing...
Don't ask me!
-Shakespeare? Really?
-Right?
This is a nice song.
-Right?
-Yeah!
I figured you'd like this kind of music.
It's, you know, soothing...
Does everyone really want
to be "soothed" that much?
I guess so.
You know, now that I think about it,
I must be the most soothed
man in all of Japan, right now.
I've got negative ions
aimed right at my back!
Give me a break.
-Maybe I should just quit.
-You can't do that!
If you quit, who will be left
to soothe the nation?
So what if I don't soothe anyone?
What are you gonna do, sue me?
That's a good one.
Better than Master Koraku, even!
No pun intended.
Well, you know, who'd have thought
you were the type.
I'm sick of hearing
"who'd have thought," too.
That should be your new name.
"Who'd have thought Haruka."
Any time someone says it...
"That's my name, don't wear it out."
"Who'd have thought..."
Oh, you make sure you thank Sugiura, okay?
Good music in the car
is all I have to look forward to.
"I often listen to this
at the end of a long day."
"Good work again, today."
I heard Sugiura was attending art school.
She had style, looks,
and an aura of cool beauty.
But that only accentuated her smile.
-Welcome.
-I'm returning this.
Oh, right.
Ms. Haruko was really happy.
She looks forward to the music all day.
Really?
I'm glad to hear it.
You're soothing the queen
of the soothing models, Sugiura.
What's that make you?
"The Soothing Sorceress"!
Come on...
There must be a way I can pay you back.
-Huh?
-After all your selections.
You don't have to pay me back.
I like playing DJ.
But if you spend every day
with someone so pretty,
you'll spoil your eyes.
Don't be silly. After all...
you're quite pretty yourself.
Welcome.
You've got it wrong.
I just came to rent CDs.
Don't fall for her.
I told you!
I just came to rent CDs.
Everyone's talking about it.
Ever since Sugiura started working here,
you've done nothing but rent CDs.
He's right. You haven't rented
any Haruhiko Arai.
I'm just doing
what's in my job description.
In truth, she's not my type.
Artistic girls like her make me nervous.
Please!
You've never met a girl
who's not your type.
DON'T PUSH YOURSELF TOO HARD.
I'M ROOTING FOR YOU.
"For as long as I live,
I will curse your name."
"Parentheses, sobs quietly."
Would I really sob quietly?
-Ms. Igawa, we're ready!
-Oh, right.
We're rolling! And...
Action!
I won't ever forgive the killer.
Until the day I die...
For the rest of my life,
I will curse his name!
Well...
How can I put it...
Who'd have thought you could be
so intense when you're angry?
But could we try a little more like usual?
Another take, but a little more reserved.
Yeah, but... I feel like...
How can I put it?
I think my character's hatred
is deeper than that.
There! Just like that!
I guess her hatred is deep,
but these days,
everyone just wants to be soothed.
Even with horror movies.
Okay! Let's give it another go!
Right.
All of Japan wanted her to soothe them.
Well, it's sure soothing for me.
She can say what she wants,
but her voice, her eyes,
her lips...
Oh, and the way she tilts
her head like this.
I was convinced
she was doing it on purpose.
You'd be surprised, though.
She's actually pretty hot-blooded.
Really? Huh.
Who'd have thought.
But then, I guess the public
puts everyone in a box.
Look at me.
I think of my movies as entertainment,
but if I actually shot one,
I bet people would call it arty.
Like, I might put the brakes on myself
so I won't be able to shoot.
Who needs them?
Brakes, that is.
Mr. Arita! Where did you come from?
But then...
I can't believe you're the chauffeur
for Haruka Igawa, Matsudo.
Do you think you could convince her
to appear in my directorial debut?
Even for a second? As a favor?
Right?
Oh, speak of the devil.
"Takeshi Matsudo"?
It's Ms. Haruko.
Oh, Ms. Igawa.
-Huh?
-That's her codename.
-Codename?
-Hello?
Good evening!
I was just eating dinner.
Tomorrow? I'm off, tomorrow.
Omotesando?
Of course, I'll go along with you!
What's going on? That sounds like a date!
Hello? This is Takeshi Matsudo.
Behind you.
Sorry. Did you wait long?
-No, I just got here.
-Really?
Today, I'm going shopping.
-I'm taking up your whole day.
-Huh?
Oh! Thai food?
-This place is pretty good!
-I see.
It does look good.
-What should I get?
-Our next match...
-Satoru! Over here!
-Huh?
Back here.
Making her way to the ring...
-Miyuki Takase!
-What is this?
Whoo!
What's this place doing here?!
Whoa!
What's going on?
Entering the ring, Madeline!
And her opponent, Ayako Sato!
Ayako! Come on, Ayako!
Come on!
Get her!
Look out!
-Ayako!
-Ayako!
-Ayako!
-Ayako!
Whoa!
Put that down!
One,
two,
three!
Alright!
-She won!
-She won!
Thank you very much!
Thanks to all of you.
So you soothe yourself with pro wrestling?
It's not for soothing.
How can I put it...
It gets me pumped up!
You really are hot-blooded.
Well, you know...
My grandma was a big Giant Baba fan.
-Excuse me, here's our order.
-Coming up.
As I watched with her,
I fell in love
with a wrestler called Gypsy Joe.
I got really into it!
I see...
No matter how many times
they hit him with a chair,
he'd get back up and be just fine!
In fact, the chair looked worse than him!
It sent a chill down my spine.
-Thank you for waiting.
-Thank you.
Thanks...
So I decided that I wanted
to be strong like him.
Who'd have thought? Oh! Sorry!
Tell me Satoru.
Why do you want to be an actor?
Well... in my case...
-I'm no different from you.
-Huh?
I saw a play in high school
and a chill went down my spine.
Wow. What kind of actor do you want to be?
Well... In terms of my taste...
I like Akira Emo...
Mr. Akira Emoto. Or outside Japan...
There's an actor named Crispin Glover.
I really like his work.
I see. Never heard of him. What's he like?
You've seen Back to the Future, right?
He was Michael J Fox's father.
He's so funny in that.
Really... I see.
It's people like you
who are meant to be actors.
What about you?
-I--
-Thank you for waiting.
-Here's your Khao Man Gai special.
-Huh?
-Here you go.
-Yes!
It's really big!
This looks great.
Thank you for the meal!
Thank you!
Come again.
Hold your fist like this.
That must be nice.
-Okay.
-Say cheese!
I wish I could be like them.
-Another one.
-Okay!
Say cheese!
Thank you very much!
-Oh, here it is!
-Nice.
Thank you so much.
With you here,
there's no song I can't find.
By the way, that's the entrance music
for the wrestler Gypsy Joe.
You know, I think we have a video too.
Entering the ring, Gypsy Joe!
What the hell? This is great!
Can I rent this? Ms. Haruko would love it!
Well...
Maybe you can...
pay me back, Matsudo.
I ALWAYS LISTEN TO THIS...
Sugiura!
I'm really sorry!
I, uh...
Ms. Haruko was running late and...
Please forgive me!
We're too late for Mulholland Drive, now.
-Sorry!
-It's okay.
Would you mind a different movie?
I have a Pia magazine.
I'll look at the schedules.
Sure.
What about this?
CHINPIRA HIGHWAY 4: THE HIROSHIMA CHAPTER
That'll do fine.
Let's go, then!
Man, that was one awful movie.
The acting and the direction...
I feel really bad, so dinner's on me.
It's fine. We'll split.
I actually liked it.
Really? You did?
Well, I guess there were some good points.
Oh! That's right! The CD!
This one.
Gypsy Joe...
Ms. Haruko was thrilled.
I thought she might
put me in a wrestling hold.
It's probably...
not the music.
I'll bet it's fun just being with you.
For Ms. Igawa, that is.
Huh?
What does that mean?
What are you trying to say?
Nothing.
I meant exactly that.
I can't help but feel a little jealous.
Huh?
Don't tell me...
What? Usually, this is the point where
I'd get the wrong idea and ask her out.
But being called a friend again is just...
-Let's be friends!
-Too scary!
We're just friends though!
Say, Sugiura.
What?
Um...
There's a rumor...
going around the rental shop
that I have a crush on you.
Have you heard?
Not a thing.
It's really awkward, right?
I'll bet it's Nakata who started it.
But so you know...
That's not my intention.
So don't worry, okay?
We're um...
We're just friends.
Just friends!
But it was good to make that clear, right?
It's important.
But still...
we're friends but...
pretty good friends, right?
Wait...
Huh? What...
You're bleeding.
I'm leaving!
What? But why?
PRO WRESTLING STRONGEST HIT SONGS
Sugiura...
quit.
What?
You didn't do anything
weird to her, did you?
No more love confessions, right?
I didn't confess a thing!
All I did was say we're friends.
What the hell do you mean "friends"?
You are such a creep!
How many female staff members
do you plan to scare away, huh?
-I'll backdrop you myself!
-Backdrop?
She promised she'd work until her test!
Test?
PRO WRESTLING STRONGEST HIT SONGS
"I always listen to this
when I'm battling something."
"It's the bell
for the championship round!"
"Can't afford to lose."
I'll bet Sugiura
thought I had feelings
for you or something.
Why would she...
How am I supposed to know that
if she doesn't say so?
You're an actor, aren't you?
You have to learn to read
people's faces or body language!
Ah!
Oh, no!
What do I do now?
Are you okay?
If it was just you, you could drive off
a cliff or hit a tanker for all I care!
But I told you
a thousand times to be careful
when Ms. Igawa is with you!
I'm sorry.
If it happens again, the repair cost
will be docked
from your paycheck, Mr. Driver.
Understood.
I told you, we should put out
an urgent ad for a driver.
Igawa's already overworked
and if anything else happens we'll...
You have a point.
But I'd like you...
to do it a little longer.
What?
That's right! It's not all bad news
for our driver, is it?
I can't believe you're making me say this.
A prisoner role.
What? Work for me?
You're playing an inmate
at a Yokohama prison.
Huh?
I've dreamed of working
with this director!
The other day,
a casting director spotted you
during Haruka's shoot.
They said you looked like an inmate.
But they have a point. I'll bet there are
potato faces in prison, too.
Thank you very much! Thank you!
Thank you!
I can't believe your luck.
No pay for your chauffeur work
during the shoot. Got it?
Way to go, Satoru! A prisoner role, huh?
I wonder what you did to get arrested.
Well...
They told me to think up
my own back story.
Really?
I'm already trembling.
Half with excitement, though.
I'll bet you never get nervous, do you?
You always look like you're having fun.
But that's a talent too, I guess.
Well, I am having fun.
I felt pressure
being a chauffeur early on,
but after bumping a lot, I got used to it.
I get to meet lots of actors...
And this role, too, only fell my way
because I've been driving you.
If this is how it is,
I'd love to be your chauffeur forever.
Why not give up acting altogether?
What?
Huh? Oh, sorry I...
You know, it's just that you...
It sometimes irritates me
how much you enjoy things.
I realize now how much
I've been putting up with everything.
Huh?
I've pretended not to notice
the way things bother me.
Wait. Hold on a second.
So it's not your fault.
Oh, she's just reading her lines...
"So go out
and find happiness for yourself."
That gave me a scare.
You don't have to hit him hard. Okay.
You hit him and... good.
Okay, everybody! Go!
All of you!
Stop!
Stop! Get off of him!
Back off! Everyone!
Get in line! Now!
You there!
What's going on?
Straight ahead.
-Look straight ahead!
-Why, after all this time...
I couldn't forgive him.
Don't turn your head!
Don't turn your heads!
Please... open your eyes!
Okay, cut!
Okay, that's good.
That's all for rehearsal!
-Are you okay?
-I'm fine!
Everyone this way!
When we're rolling,
I'll go harder. So don't move.
-Yes, sir.
-If you move...
my hand will hit your ears
and you could burst an eardrum.
-Understood.
-Be careful.
-Understood.
-Okay, here comes a take!
-Break a leg.
-Thanks.
-They're tasty.
-Thank you.
-Have some.
-Thanks.
-Have some. Glad the weather's cleared.
-Right.
You from Kansai, kid?
Yes. From Hyogo.
I'm from Nishinomiya.
-What? For real?
-Yeah.
Me too. I lived right by the Muko river.
-Really?
-Yeah.
-What junior high?
-Um, Nishi Junior high.
No way! We went to the same school!
-You mean it?
-What a coincidence.
-Were you in a club?
-I played rugby.
-No way!
-For real?
-Incredible!
-You're my senior!
I am! I played rugby too!
-An alumni!
-Are they any good these days?
Not so much, these days.
I realize now how much
I've been putting up with everything.
I pretended not to notice
the way things bother me.
-So--
-Cut!
Cut!
Ms. Igawa...
Do you think you could
tilt your head 45 degrees?
"Silly me." Like that.
I bet that will be more soothing.
Please.
Okay, take two. Roll film.
Quiet on the set!
We're rolling!
Stand by! And...
Action!
Without you, Nami, I...
I realize now that--
-Cut!
-Ms. Igawa!
Just a little more.
"Silly me." Like this.
Excuse me, but...
Who exactly am I soothing in this scene?
Me!
You're soothing me!
One more time.
Okay, take three!
-Roll film!
-Quiet on the set!
We're rolling!
And... action!
Without you, Nami, I...
I...
I...
How much do you expect me to take?
I'm not your damn maid!
You can't treat me like this!
It's about time you learned to take care
of yourself! How old are you?
Are you a two-year-old?
What shall we do?
I thought it might be interesting
if I got a bit angrier.
What do you think? No good?
Sorry, everybody!
One more time! Over here!
-Okay, we're ready for take one.
-Roll film!
Quiet on the set.
And... action!
Stop! Get off him!
Get off him now!
-Back to work!
-Let go!
Stop this, now! All of you!
Get in line! Now!
You there!
What's going on?
Why, after all this time...
I just couldn't forgive him.
Please!
Open your eyes!
And, cut!
Um, didn't you just hit the wrong guy?
Oh, I'm sorry!
I got mixed up.
Me and this kid were talking
during the break and...
-Right? Another take?
-Yeah.
No, it's fine.
Yeah. Okay, everybody!
-Okay, ready for the next scene!
-Lucky you.
You got a closeup.
-Thank you very much!
-That looked pretty good!
-Thanks, kid.
-No, thank you.
-Good work folks!
-This way!
That was a shock...
You made a face for the ages!
-Man...
-Good for you.
-When you've got it, you've got it.
-Well...
Some people have all the luck.
You sure make me jealous!
Maybe I had a weird aura or something.
You might be right.
-It kinda hurt, though.
-I'll bet.
I've been practicing my reaction
for that scene
since the day of my audition.
You may have good luck,
but your acting sucks.
Don't think you can get by
with expressions like that.
Just ignore him.
Luck is a skill too.
Your expression was pretty odd, though.
That was so much fun!
Everyone had these blank stares...
Like this.
Ms. Hitachi's was the funniest of all!
All I did was say what I really think.
But then, no one cares
who I really am, do they?
I'm thinking of quitting.
There are plenty of people
who could replace me.
All I do is tilt my head...
Plus, it makes my shoulders stiff.
That's...
That won't do.
Why?
Well...
when it comes to me...
There are not only replacements,
they're probably better!
There's no one
who could replace you, Ms. Haruka.
Sure there is.
-There isn't.
-There is.
-There isn't.
-There is!
-There isn't!
-There is!
There isn't.
There is.
-There isn't.
-I said there is!
-There isn't!
-There is!
There isn't!
The kid's hopeless.
Whether he falls in love
or someone falls for him,
it makes no difference.
He'll go his whole life without a girl.
You or Yoshimira should date him,
Ms. Yamashita.
He's not my type. He comes on too strong.
-Oh, welcome home!
-Look who it is!
We were just talking--
Huh? A guest? Come on in.
Sorry it's so cramped.
Hang on, I'll clear a space,
We were just holding
a griping session about you.
Come on, sit down.
Sit down, I said.
Oh, your guest too. Have a seat.
Matsudo...
You...
You chose Haruka Igawa over Sugiura?
What's wrong with you!
Doesn't it strike you as odd?
I mean, when was the last time
you looked in the mirr--
What?
It's her, right?
You're Haruka Igawa, aren't you?
This is Ms. Igawa.
I'm Igawa.
Huh? Th-The real thing? Why?
She came in like it was
the most natural thing in the world.
And she's still here.
Tell her, Tsukamoto.
Tell Haruko what you like about her.
-Huh?
-Ms. Haruko...
This is my roommate, Tsukamoto,
but one day,
he'll be a major film director!
And he's a big fan of yours!
-Tell her, Tsukamoto.
-Tell her what?
What you said before!
About her eyes, her ears, and her lips!
-She's thinking of retiring!
-What? Retiring?
Y-You can't... you shouldn't retire.
Oh, excuse me.
I'm Tsukamoto. Tetsuo Tsukamoto.
My dream is...
happens to be
to make a movie with you as the star.
So if you were to retire,
I would automatically become a director
who never made their debut film.
Or rather...
I, uh, I have no idea what I'm saying.
-Tsukamoto!
-Right! Whatever the case,
I love you! Ms. Igawa!
Oh, uh...
Forgive me, but...
Sorry.
-Oh!
-Who's that?
Huh?
S-Sugiura?
What?
Oh, look. It's jerk-off.
-Wait... huh? Why...
-Yeah, why?
Don't think I came running here for you.
The CD you stole!
I just came to get it back.
Oh, look. Is it in here?
It's Gypsy Joe!
Well, now...
Seeing your face again has me
disgusted, so I'll cut to the chase.
You!
You're in love
with Haruka Igawa, aren't you?
That's a total misunderstanding, but...
W-What's with... Huh? What happened?
Why the sudden image change?
I haven't changed a thing!
This is the real me!
I passed my test to become a pro wrestler,
so from now on, I'll be living as a heel!
You deaf, punk?
Who are you?
You think you're hot stuff just
because you look a bit like Haruka Igawa.
What makes you soothing?
The soothing girl of the future...
will be someone hot-blooded like me!
Take that!
Here we go.
Ow!
One, two, three!
Alright!
This is my way of life!
-Come tomorrow, I'll live on!
-We'll live on!
-We'll live on!
-Yeah!
We'll live on!
You all too! Come on!
Help me!
Mercy! Mercy-mercy-mercy!
I can't! Someone help me!
"The rugged Pyrrhus."
-"The rugged Pyrrhus."
-"The rugged Pyrrhus."
-"The rugged Pyrrhus."
-"The rugged Pyrrhus."
"The rugged Pyrrhus."
"The rugged Pyrrhus,
-he whose sable arms,
-he whose sable arms,
-black as his purpose,
-black as his purpose,
-did the night resemble!
-did the night resemble!"
"When he lay couchèd in the ominous horse,
hath now this dread
and black complexion smear'd."
"With heraldry more dismal,
head to foot..."
Seriously? Oh, man...
Who'd have thought
I'd ever see her like this.
I'd have thought it!
She's an actress, after all.
I think the driver
has completed his mission.
"The rugged Pyrrhus,
he whose sable arms,
black as his purpose,
did the night resemble."
TWO MONTHS LATER
Stop! Get off him!
Stop this, now!
All of you!
Get in line!
You there.
What's going on?
Why, after all this time...
You may have good luck,
but your acting sucks.
Don't think you can get by
with expressions like that.
It's people like you
who are meant to be actors.
What's this? You thinking
of becoming an action star?
Mr. Hirayama.
How exactly do I improve my acting?
I was completely unprepared for that slap.
Yeah, that was pretty bad.
Huh?
You just have to live with purpose.
That's all there is.
The only preparation an actor needs.
If I recite that rugged Pyrrhus speech,
can I live with purpose?
Hell if I know.
What does it mean, anyway?
Hell if I know that either.
They drilled it into me in London.
But in my case...
it keeps me going.
The rugged Pyrrhus...
He whose sable arms
Black as his purpose
Did the night resemble
When he lay couchèd in the ominous horse
Hath now
This dread and black complexion smeared
With heraldry more dismal, head to foot
"Now is he total gules, horridly tricked,
with blood of fathers,
mothers, daughters, sons."
"Baked and impasted
with the parching streets
that lend a tyrannous and a damnèd light
to their lord's murder."
"Roasted in wrath and fire,
and thus o'ersized with coagulate gore."
"With eyes like carbuncles,
the hellish Pyrrhus
old grandsire Priam seeks."
EVERYONE NEEDS A LITTLE TEA TIME
Will this be a one-week rental?
No, three nights only, please.
Th-th-th-three nights!
-That'll be 370 yen!
-Here you are.
-Thank you very much!
-Thanks.
Shinya Tsukamoto...
STAFF RECOMMEND: THE FILMS
OF SHINYA TSUKAMOTO, TETSUO: THE IRON MAN
As usual, I was short on acting work
and I'd worked long enough at the store
that I started training new employees.
"Master back" means returning tapes
to the floor, starting with new releases.
This is our most important task.
Got it.
-Try it.
-Right.
Return... master back. That's right.
Return... Welcome!
Welcome!
It's okay. Just do as I do.
Welcome!
W-W-Welcome!
W-W-Welcome!
You pick up quickly!
Oh, thanks.
-Whoo! Welcome!
-Whoo! Welcome!
What's with her?
What are you doing over there?
-Oh, thanks for today.
-Sure.
-I'm feeling a bit tired.
-I see.
-Can I join you?
-Go ahead.
Those glasses look broken.
You are right.
I almost never stopped
to look at scenes like this,
but it felt strangely comfortable.
-Say, Higa... Were you a yanki in school?
-What?
-Me? No way!
-Oh, yeah?
I didn't go to high school,
but I wasn't a yanki.
But you were an actor, huh?
Um, yeah. In the present tense, though.
Wow! So you performed and stuff?
Um, yeah. Still do, though.
Sounds nice! I'd like to try.
Try what? Acting?
But I guess it's pretty hard, right?
I don't know if I'd call it hard...
Though she seemed like an oddball,
she might just be...
I'm sure you'll find someone
who is right for you.
These things are gross!
But that's a story for another time.
Tastes like crap.
-I'm quitting.
-Whoa!
Uh, I...
I'm going to commit seppuku!
And I will be your second.
Aieen!
Did I even say that right?
"Seppuku surude degozaru?"
Ever since I came to Tokyo,
I've had a lot more boogers.
When I'm with Higa,
I feel the need to straighten myself out.
That girl’s got a lot to deal with.
Your boyfriend's a boxer?
Th-this is more serious than I thought.
I couldn't take the final step!
Aren't we supposed to be his friends?
It's about time
I did something with my life too.
...At how we're all working
toward something.
Better finish it today.
I feel cold.
I'm in the middle of one
of the most important moments of my life.
Translated by Bradley Plumb