Lost (2004–2010): Season 2, Episode 4 - Everybody Hates Hugo - full transcript

Previously on Lost:

Locke, do you have a message
to go on the raft?

For when they get rescued.
They can contact your family.

- Michael!
- Jin!

We were on a plane.
Sydney to Los Angeles.

- Flight 815?
- Right.

Back up!

Coming out.

Hi, there, Hurley!

- Jin, you're here.
- I sure am.

- Dude, you speak English.
- No. You're speaking Korean.



Everything's going to change.

Everything's going to change.

Have a "cluckety-cluck-cluck" day, Hugo.

Hurley!

- You fell asleep?
- No. I was just... resting my eyes.

- The numbers are written right there.
- Yeah. I remember the numbers.

Locke went back to the beach,
so I'll be taking the next shift.

Awesome.

Jack told me about your job.

At least we have jobs again, right?

Hooray for us.

Well, ain't life grand?

What I wouldn't give
for a cup of water right now...

No way. No more human pyramids.
Just forget it.



Hey!

Hey! Hey! Let us out of here!

Enough! Just chill!

Every minute I spend down here

is another minute
my boy is still out there.

Well, let me break it down for ya,
Mikey.

Rambina and her buddies are trying
to figure out what to do with us,

so until they make up their damn mind,
there ain't nothing we can do.

Yeah.

Why don't you pee on it?

Grab the rope.

Please.

Don't do it.

Climb the rope, or I shoot your friend.

You next.

Don't do it. She's bluffing.

Gun's only got one bullet,
she ain't gonna waste it on...

Son of a bitch!

- God!
- Grab the rope.

You want me, Hot Lips? You're gonna
have to come down here and get...

Bitch.

4, 8, 15,

16 and 23,
with the Mega Number 42.

Whoever has those numbers has won
or will share in a near-record jackpot.

That's right, Mary Jo, because
this is the 16th week without a winner.

Hugo?

Hugo! Oh! Hugo, wake up! Wake up!

Stop!

Ma, stop! I just slipped.

Slipped, sitting down? Is it your heart?

- Ma, I'm fine.
- You're lying.

I always know.
You don't look me in the eye.

- I'm not lying.
- Then tell me what happened.

It must have been something I ate.

Yes, something you ate, because
you eat basura, and you don't exercise.

- I do exercise.
- Falling down is not exercise.

The only time you move
is to lift a drumstick from the bucket.

Every day, it's the same thing:
Work, TV, chicken.

You have to change your life, Hugo.

You think someone else
will change it for you?

Maybe if you pray every day
Jesus Christ will come down,

take 200 pounds and bring you
a decent woman. And a new car.

Yes, Jesus can bring you a new car.

Maybe I don't wanna change.
Maybe I like my life.

That must be Jesus.

Yes, it is Jesus! He wants
to know what colour car you want!

Hurley! All right, mate?
We need to have a little chat.

Mummy's off for a walk,
so it's just you, me, and the baby.

Spill it.

Spill what?

The hatch. What's in it?

Nothing, really.

You've been out there an entire day
and night. Looking at nothing?

Well, I guess
it's kind of like a bunker.

You know, from World War Two?
Only newer.

And what's in it?

I don't know.

But somehow you know it's a bunker.

Well, I guess someone told me?

You're gonna lie to me?

- You're gonna lie to the baby?
- Dude, look, I'd never lie.

And the time you told me
you were worth $150 million?

- It's 156 million.
- I'm sorry!

I must've confused it
with the 900 trillion I am worth myself!

And this baby's made of
chocolate lollipops, so excuse us,

I'm going to flap my wings
and fly off this island.

- Hey, Rose.
- Hey, yourself.

So, doing laundry, huh?

Indeed I am.

You wanna hand me
those dirty clothes over there?

Thank you.

Don't you wanna know what happened?

- What happened?
- You know... out there.

Everyone's asking me
what's in the hatch.

Well, that's your business, honey.

- Don't you wanna know?
- Well, whatever it is,

it's not going to help
get this laundry done, now is it?

Well, actually, it sort of is.

It's around here somewhere...

Someone actually lived down here?

Well, what is it for?

It's kind of a long story.

Hurley. Who else did you tell?

No one. I swear.

Dude, it's a big job. I needed...

help.

- Hello, Jack.
- Hey, Rose.

She's cool. She won't tell anyone.

Honey,
I don't even know what I would say.

All this is food?

It's only a matter of time before we
have to tell everyone what we found.

So, you know what to do?

Inventory all of it,
and figure out how we make it last.

In the meantime,
nobody gets anything.

No exceptions.
That's your responsibility, Hurley. OK?

- What's that?
- You don't wanna know.

"Dharma Initiative salad dressing:
Ranch composite."

That sounds tasty.

"Apollo Bars?" You ever hear of these?

But candy is candy.
That's what Bernard always says.

Talk about a sweet tooth.

That man has a mouth
full of sweet teeth.

- Bernard. That was your husband?
- "Is" my husband.

But I thought he was
in the back of the plane?

- I'm sorry, I didn't mean...
- No, that's OK, don't feel bad.

Bernard is fine. I know it.

You wanna get the canned tuna?

Everyone's gonna hate me, Rose.

Now, that's just plain silly.

You're about the only one on this island
that everybody loves.

Well, that'll change.

You happen to find any shampoo in here?

Yeah, there's some right over here.

Kate, you can't take it...

Thanks, Hurley.

- It's just one bottle.
- That's where it starts.

Welcome to Mr Cluck's,
can I take your order?

Hey, Hugo.

- You OK, man?
- Yeah. Fine.

Reyes! My office! Now!

You wanna tell me something, Reyes?

No.

You sure about that?

Yeah.

This is last night's surveillance tape.

Reyes, you owe the company
for an eight-piece dark-meat combo.

- I didn't eat eight.
- You want to watch the whole tape?

Oh, and while you're here:
How many times do I gotta tell you

those napkins cost money, all right?

It's two per customer. Two. We're not
made of money here at Mr Cluck's, Reyes.

I'm not made of money.
Are you made of money?

If you're made of money,
maybe you don't want to work here.

So, get it together.
What, is that a problem, Reyes?

Dude, I quit.

Oh, my God.

- Oh, my God.
- Dude? Are you OK?

- I'm fine.
- Randy is losing his brain in there!

You should get back in
or he'll make you scrub johns all week.

Doubt it. I quit, too.

- What?
- Looks like we got ourselves a day off.

Who needs money
when you got good looks?

You can come out now.

I saw you back at the rock.

Then at the mangrove tree.

In fact, I've walked in a big circle.
I'm not sure how you didn't realise it.

All right, you don't have to insult me.

You wanna tell me
why you've been following me, Charlie?

Yeah.

Quite simply, John,
there are a lot of secrets around here.

And I'm tired of being
at the kids' table.

I got Claire's baby back!

I didn't go to the Black Rock
on the A-Team mission,

but I would have,
if someone had asked me.

I think I'm entitled
to some sodding answers around here.

What do you want to know?

How's it going?

It's not. On the other side of this
door, there's more concrete.

I'd say it's at least
eight-to-ten-feet thick.

Did you see this?

Interesting.
Good thing this is titanium.

Almost no magnetic attraction.

Well, we're not going to get in up here.

Up here?

Perhaps we can go under it.

Grab the rope.

I ain't doing nothing
until I know my friends are OK.

So we're friends now, huh?

Do it now or the rope comes up.

Howdy, boys, thanks for the rescue.

Everything is cool, we had a talk and
they believe we were on the plane, too.

Swell. I guess we can all sue
Oceanic together.

What you got there?

- Nothing.
- A rock? Looking for some revenge?

- You got three seconds to drop it.
- Ana.

One, two...

Now, hold on...

Hey, what's...

You didn't say "three".

Shut up. When I tell you
to do something, you do it.

I say move, you move.
I say stop, you stop.

- I say jump, what do you say?
- "You first."

You don't like the rules, I toss
your ass back in the pit right now.

You understand?

I understand.

It's getting dark. We're moving out.

- Moving out where?
- What did I just tell you?

Sorry. Forgot. Just one thing, though.

You hit me again, I'll kill you.

Let's go.

He pushed that button every 108 minutes?

- He did indeed.
- How is that possible? Didn't he sleep?

Don't know.
I didn't get a chance to ask him.

After all that time, he just
up and left? Why? Where'd he go?

Don't know.

I tried to track him,
but he didn't leave much of a trail.

I guess he'd found his replacements.

- Meaning us?
- Meaning us.

It sounds a bit... nutty, doesn't it?

It is what it is, Charlie.

And what happens if we don't push it?

We're not going to find out.
I'm setting up a system.

I'm still working on it, but looks like
two-person shifts every six hours or so.

Shifts. Pushing a button?

Oh, and there's a record player.

What's Hurley been doing there?

He's in charge of the food.

Food?

Hey, mate.

- Where you been?
- Hey. I've been... around.

I know, Hurley.

- You know what?
- I know about the food.

- Locke told me everything.
- Locke's lying.

About the button we have to push every
108 minutes or the island explodes?

- It's not gonna explode.
- Ah!

- Come on.
- Look, Jack put me in charge.

- I don't even want to...
- Is there peanut butter?

- What?
- Peanut butter. Nutty? Creamy?

Staple of children everywhere?

Yeah, a couple jars.

Brilliant. How about you give us one?

It's for Claire.

- No can do, man.
- You're saying no to a nursing mother?

- It's not like that.
- It's exactly like that.

I never thought this would happen,
but you've become one of them.

- One of them?
- Them. The man. Management.

I thought we were friends.
You've changed, man.

You are everybody

You are everybody

- Acting like you're stupid
- Exactly like you're people

- Wearing your clothes and whatnot...
- Wearing expensive something...

Drive Shaft... More like Suck Shaft.

I'm gonna go check out the headphones.

Sure. Headphones.

- Hugo.
- Starla.

Why aren't you chuckleheads at work?

We're currently exploring
other opportunities.

- You quit?
- I did.

He's mixing it up today. He's off the
rails. Somebody get a straightjacket!

- Hey, can I try those on?
- You're messing with my world-view.

You're my rock.
I mean, if you quit your job,

the next thing you know, bees will stop
making honey, and flowers will die,

and, hell,
the whole damn thing will fall apart.

So, Starla...

Sorry. Uh, well...

The Hold Steady's
playing the Troubadour this weekend.

- And I was wondering, maybe Friday...
- Oh, I have to work.

- Oh, no, I didn't mean...
- I can probably go Saturday. That cool?

Yeah. That's totally cool.

You've been crushing on her
for months and doing nothing.

Today, you're fricking Fabio! Seriously,
man, what has gotten into you?

Nothing. I just wanted
to ask her out before...

- Before what?
- Nothing.

This is the last duct. I believe we're
under the area where we began.

They've poured concrete
all the way down here, too.

Just as thick.

Maybe there's a way around it.

What is all this stuff?

My best guess? There's a geothermal
generator behind this wall.

That's the power source.

Careful with these pipes.
They are very hot.

That's it. Nothing. It's blocked.

So, what do you think, Sayid?

- What do I think about what, Jack?
- This place, the computer.

What do you think is going on?

The last time I heard of concrete being
poured over everything in this way...

was Chernobyl.

- Did you hit something?
- I don't think so.

It's coming from over there.

I'm gonna check it out.

- Hey.
- Hey.

You took a shower.

Had to see if it worked.

How was it?

Pressure sucked
and it kind of went cold at one point,

and it smelled a little bit
like sulphur, but it was a shower.

Yeah. Yeah, I know what you mean.

You could use one.

Maybe a little later.

I'll leave the shampoo for you.

- I'm Libby.
- Michael.

How many of you? You know,
on the other side of the island?

When we left, around 40.

How many of you survived?

Twenty-three of us.

Are you all right?

Now you give a damn.

I said I'm sorry.
It was a misunderstanding.

A misunderstanding is when you bring me
lemonade instead of iced tea.

- I said no talking.
- He was talking to me!

We're here.

What are you gonna do, beam us up?

I thought you said
there were 23 of you.

There were.

Hi, Sun.

What's wrong?

I found something out in the water.

And I told Shannon about it,
and we thought you should know...

It's the messages from the raft.

We thought you should decide what to do.

Why did you tell Charlie, man?

- Because he asked, Hugo.
- You shouldn't have.

You should have listened to me about
coming down here. It's all gonna change.

- Everything.
- Change is good, Hugo.

You know, people say that,
but it's not true, man.

Trust me, I know.
And guess who gets to be the bad guy?

Who says "No, you can't have
peanut butter for the cute blonde

and her poor island baby."
You know who? It's me.

You know what? I'm not gonna do it.
Find someone else to deal with the chow.

No, we all have our jobs, Hugo.

Mine is to convince people
to push a button every 108 minutes

without them knowing why or for what.

- Wanna trade?
- I don't wanna do this, man.

I've had lots of jobs
I didn't want to do.

But I still did them.

I'm sorry, Hugo,

you don't get to quit.

OK, then.

- Be careful!
- Dude. I am.

- You got it?
- Yeah, I got it.

All right. Let's go!

- Do you think we got enough gnomes?
- We're good.

- This is genius.
- No, no, to the left, dude.

- More of an angle.
- Hey!

Run!

Cluck you, Randy!

Freedom!

- Dude, what are you doing?
- Freedom!

So, anything else you wanna do tonight?

You better let me know now, because our
day off is just about over, Huggy Bear.

In about ten hours we're gonna have
to find ourselves some new employment.

I hear Pizza Bin is hiring.
Or we could try our luck at Gyro-rama.

I do kind of dig the chick
who works at the Bin.

Dude, promise me something.

OK, what?

Promise me that no matter what happens,
we'll never change.

This'll never change.

OK. Oh! I know what this is about.

I know why you've been
acting so weird lately.

You're getting that stomach-stapling
surgery thing, aren't you?

- I'm not getting surgery.
- Come on, it's cool.

I can still be all surprised,

I can be like,
"Ooh, my, Hurley. Wow, is that you?"

Listen, Johnny, I'm serious.

Promise me that you and I
will always stay the same.

I'll do you one better. Not only will I
stay gold, Ponyboy, I will drink to it.

Can I borrow two bucks?

What you got there, Hurley?

It's dynamite.

Dynamite?
Well, what are you doing with it?

I'm sorry.
But I can't let it happen again.

Why is there a news crew here?

Dude, we shouldn't go here.

Dude, let's go,
they jack the prices here.

Maybe somebody got shot.

Yeah, one guy.
And I was there, you know.

I was right next to him.

Why are you doing this, honey?

- Look, just get out of here, Rose.
- But you're gonna hurt somebody.

Not if I do it from outside the door.
It's thick.

And I'll make sure there's nobody around
first. So, please, will you just go?

Uh-uh. You haul me off the beach
and you drag me into this place,

the least I can get is an explanation
before you blow it up.

You don't get it.
This is gonna mess it all up!

Dude! Somebody won the lottery!

Let me tell you something, Rose. We were
all fine before we had any potato chips.

Now we've got these potato chips,
everyone's gonna want them.

So, Steve gets them, Charlie's pissed,

but not pissed at Steve,
he's pissed at me.

That's the guy!

That's the guy!

And I'm gonna be in the middle of it.

And then it's gonna be, "What about us?"
"Why didn't I get any potato chips?"

"Help us out, Hurley.
Why did you give Kate the shampoo?"

"Why didn't I get the peanut butter?"

Then, they'll get really mad
and start asking,

"Why does Hugo have everything?
Why should he get to decide?"

Then they'll all hate me.

I don't know what to do.

Come on, Jack, the inventory's done.
This is the only way.

Are you serious?

Dude, there's enough food in there

to feed one guy three meals a day
for another three months.

We have 40 people.
It's just not gonna work.

Look, you put me in charge,
this is what we're doing.

OK.

- OK?
- Yeah. OK.

OK.

Excuse me.

Hi.

Back where you guys,
where you came from...

is there a woman named Rose there?

Black chick in her fifties?

Is she...

is she OK?

Yeah, man. She's OK.

Oh, thank you.

Michael. I'm Michael.

Thank you, Michael.

I'm Bernard.

OK.

It's OK. She's good.