Looking (2014–2015): Season 1, Episode 5 - Looking for the Future - full transcript

Ripped By mstoll
Happy New Year 2015 - New Year, New Color ;-)

(CAR ALARM SOUNDS)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER OUTSIDE)

(FLOOR CREAKS)

(RICHIE STIRS)

(FLOOR CREAKS)

(RICHIE PLAYING GUITAR
AND SINGING)

Oh, please, God, no.

Okay.

(PATRICK GIGGLES)

(SINGS IN SPANISH)

Wow. Yes.



That was really good.

- I'm still working on it.
-No, it's beautiful.

Don't make fun of me.

I'm not making fun.
You have a guitar.

It's a bass.
It's the instrument of love.

- Oh, really?
-Yeah.

(PLAYS FUNKY BASSLINE)

Okay, I gotta go.

You've made me late
like six times already.

Three times.

I've stayed over at
your place three times.

Okay, three times.

I love your place,
by the way.

Yeah, right.



Don't front.
You know it's a dump.

I'm not fronting.
I genuinely like it here.

Wait...

You have two of these?

I don't remember this one.

It's my scapular.

What's that?

It's for good luck.

I used to wear it all the time,
but then I stopped for some reason.

I don't know.
Guess I'm feeling lucky again.

(VEHICLE REVERSING BEEPING
FROM OUTSIDE)

Oh, fuck. I really--
I have to go.

- I gotta go to work.
-No, you can't go now.

Really? Why not?

Oh.

Good morning.

You gotta stop.
You gotta stop.

I'm not doing anything.

Okay, you know what?
Fuck...

You have a really
nice penis.

You have an
incredible penis,

but I've got to
go to work.

Oh, you have lo be
a good little boy, all right.

Fuck you.

I gotta go.

I'll see you soon.

Bye.

(DOORBELL RINGS)

(INTERCOM RINGS)

(BUZZING)

(FOOTSTEPS ON STAIRS)

Oh, fuck yeah.

(EXHALES)

Okay, okay.

Relax, you just took a shower.

Okay.

Oh, fuck.

Oh, man. I really want to fuck you.

Will you let me fuck you?

I don't really have--

Oh, fuck, can you stop?
I'm gonna cum.

I don't want to cum yet.

Oh, fuck. I'm gonna cum.

No, no, no.

Oh, fuck. I'm cumming.

(STRAINED GASPS)

(RICHIE SWALLOWING)

(EXHALES, SNIFFS)

Did you have
pineapple yesterday?

Why?

I can still taste your...

Come on.

Seriously?

I gave you
the three-second warning,

so you can't blame me.

I don't mean it as a bad thing.

I'm just saying.

What, you don't do that?

Not on purpose.
Not on an empty stomach.

Thank you.

I kinda just get nervous
'cause it's not 100 percent safe.

I get that it's pretty safe,
but you never know.

Oh.
(CHUCKLES)

What?

You think I'm a puto.

I-- What is that?

A guy who fucks around
with a lot of guys,

swallows a lot of cum.

Are you?

I'm just paranoid.

I sneeze and I think
I've got HIV.

I get tested all the time
even though I'm incredibly safe.

So why do you
get tested?

You know,
just to be 100 percent sure.

My last boyfriend
was positive.

Really?

Don't worry.
I'm not.

Weren't you freaked out?

Dating someone that,
you know...?

Yeah, a little.

But I loved him,
so what are you gonna do?

You just deal.

Right.

I don't do that often,
by the way.

Do what?

This morning.

I don't know.
I couldn't help myself.

Oh, shit.

I gotta go.
I gotta get the bill.

- You gotta go?
-Yeah, I gotta get to work.

Oh, come on.
Let's split it.

- I got it.
-Are you sure?

- Yeah.
-All right.

Oh, my God.

- They've got "Goonies" cards.
-Really?

Yeah, that's like
my favorite movie of all time.

I never saw it.

Are you serious?

Oh, my God, I was in love
with Sean Astin as kid.

Come on,
One-Eyed Willy, Chunk?

(IMITATES SLOTH FROM THE GOONIES)
"Hey, you guys."

You have to
see the movie

to get how incredible
that impression was.

- That was pretty adorable.
-Thank you.

I'm gonna get you one.

No, they're five bucks.

Five bucks for
20-year-old gum?

Look, that was the guy.

That's the picture of
the guy I was just doing.

(MOCKINGLY)
He had a weird ear like this.

That's the face
you made this morning.

(GIGGLES)
Shut up.

Oh, my God. Okay.

You can't tell me
that that little boy

is not completely hot.

I wanted to make out
with him so bad

when I was younger.

I used to have braces
like that when I was little.

Really?
Let me see your teeth.

No.

Why?

I don't like them. They used
to call me El Dientes

-when I was little.
-They did?

Oh, now you
have to show me.

- No.
-Come on, smile.

Come on, show me
those pearly whites.

Give me a smile,
come on.

- No.
-Oh, see?

You have beautiful teeth.

You need to
smile more often.

-I'll try.
-Okay.

What?

I don't know. Look what we're
finding out about each other.

Neither of us has AIDS,

you don't like your teeth, you have
bad taste in movies.

- No, I don't.
-You do.

All right, you know what?

I'm gonna make
a call right now.

To work.

Yeah?

Oh, God.
It's too much pressure now.

- It's like New Year's Eve.
-Let me choose.

All right, you can choose, but it's
gotta be something I want to do.

I'm not skipping work
unless we do something great.

Okay.

I know where we're going.

Yeah?

Where?

You'll just have
to wait and see.

- You're not gonna tell me?
-Nope.

All right,
well, it better be good.

(TRAM BLEEPS)

I want to know...

about the first time
you were with a guy.

Oh, why do you
want to know that?

'Cause I want to know.

- You don't want to tell me?
-No, I'll tell you.

I was 15.

Fifteen.

I would have been
into you at 15.

Oh, no, no, no.

My balls hadn't dropped yet,
and I was seriously chunky.

- Me, too.
-You were?

- Oh, yeah. I was big.
-Oh, good. I love that.

I love ex-fatties.

I feel like they're
always nicer people.

Um..

So picture this,

we're on the way back
from computer camp...

- Sexy.
-Yeah, so sexy, right?

Coming from Salt Lake City,

and I'm on
the back of the bus

with Greg Reynolds,

who had gone through
puberty at nine,

and had a hairy chest.

- He was like a real stud.
-Straight?

I don't know.
We both had girlfriends,

so who's to say?

But we're sitting on the bus,

talking about
computer stuff.

There's a big blanket
over us,

and at one point,
he takes my hand

and puts it on his
enormous penis.

- Hot. That's hot.
-Yeah.

And he let you
jerk him off?

Mm-hm.

- Did he cum?
-Mm-hm.

In my hand.

Before we got
to the Colorado border

which I remember,

because I was relieved
that it happened in Utah

and not on my home state.

Like it made
a difference or something.

I don't know.
It was so stupid.

(GIGGLING)

That's hot.
I like that.

Yeah.

PATRICK: We're such tourists!

What, are you gonna take me
boating on the lake?

Are we going to the
AIDS memorial?

I'm not sure I wanna do that.

Or we could--
The buffalo?

Are we seeing the buffalo?

RICHIE: Oh, my God.
Will you stop talking?

I'm not good with silences,
just so you know.

PATRICK: I went on a date once
with a guy

and we ran out of things to say
before the appetizers,

and it was horrible.

RICHIE: So we're doing good?

Yeah.

This is much better
than that one.

AUDIO COMMENTARY: The universe
has long captured our imagination...

Okay.
I love it.

It's probably my favorite place
in the whole city.

Really?

I used to go to planetariums
all the time with my mother,

before she sent me
back to Mexico.

(COMMENTARY CONTINUES)
Why'd you go to Mexico?

I don't know.

She sent me there 'cause
she thought it'd be good for me,

but then it wasn't,
so I came back.

We would get hot dogs too.

I was a fat kid,
remember?

That's right.

Oh, and there was
a song, too.

There's a song?

Mm-hm.
It's educational.

Will you sing it to me?

Please?

Yeah...

(SINGS IN SPANISH)

I can't believe
I remember that.

How does it go?
What does it say?

(RICHIE SINGS IN SPANISH)
(PATRICK JOINS IN)

It was like the planets.

Yeah.

(PATRICK ATTEMPTS
TO SING IN SPANISH)

No, not...
(BOTH GIGGLING)

What?

This is sort of like when Ross
took Rachel on their date.

Oh, my God,
it totally is.

I want to be Ross.

You mean Rachel?

No, you're the one
that's crazy into hair,

and I'm the geek.

Yeah, but I thought
she's kind of like the boss,

which is kind of
like the top.

Okay, then,
I want to be her.

That's what I thought.

Cos you wouldn't
let me fuck you?

Yeah, well.

It was kind of
a surprise, to be honest.

Oh, my God.

Why does everybody
think that?

What is it about my ass that
screams out "I want to be fucked"?

You don't have to be ashamed.

- I'm not ashamed.
-Whatever.

It's totally fine if
you're not into it.

No, it's not that
I'm not into it, I just...

I'm not sure
I like it very much.

I mean,
it feels kind of weird.

Weird how?

Well...

I can get it in,

but pretty much
as soon as it's in,

I'm like "Take it out,
take it out, take it out,

take it out, take it out."

You think you'd
be embarrassed

if your parents thought
you were a bottom?

No.

No.

Okay.

Okay, maybe a little bit.

I thought so.

You have bottom shame.

Oh, my God,
I think you're right.

I think so.

Why?

What, are you...?

Those terms are for
people on websites.

How do you know what you're
into with a guy sexually

until you're with them?

- Really?
-Yeah.

I mean,
you gotta be adaptable.

Otherwise,
you're gonna miss out.

I do hate to miss out.

That being said,

I probably,
usually am Rachel.

Oh, I knew it.

You Rachel.

Wait, which one
is that again? I forget.

Oh, right.
She's the boss.

She's the top,
she's the top.

Right, well...

good to know.

Oh, my God.
Are you serious?

Yeah. He'd come over
every week

and try to
turn us Mormon.

What?

My mother was Catholic though,
so she wasn't gonna turn,

-but she loved to argue about God.
-How old were you?

- Thirteen, 14, maybe?
-That is young.

Yeah, he was older too.

Eighteen, I think?

- Wow.
-He was beautiful.

He used to wear these
white starched shirts.

And his hair was perfect.

He was completely gay--

Maybe he's what
got you into hair.

Maybe he's what got me
into white boys.

I wanted to have
sex with him so bad.

I gave him a blowjob
in my bedroom

while my mother was
cooking dinner downstairs.

Oh, my God.
Are you serious?

Jesus Christ,
when you were 14?

Wow.

Did you swallow
his cum?

I'm kidding.
You don't have to answer that.

Oh, he would come over
every week

until my mom caught on,
and then it was over.

Did she freak out'!

I think she was just happy
I didn't turn Mormon.

(CHUCKLING)

My father though, that was
a completely different story.

He didn't
take it so well.

How badly did he take it?

Hmm.
Just badly.

Is he okay now?

Not really.

What are you gonna do?

This is so good.

This hit the spot.

PATRICK: I should not have gotten
a veggie dog, it's disgusting.

RICHIE: I told you.

Well, it had been
a really crappy Thanksgiving

because I'd been thinking about
telling my mom the whole time,

but I just couldn't do it.

And then I finally did it

on the way to the airport
in the car.

Because I thought
if we were in the car,

she wouldn't have
to look me in the eye.

What did she say?

Well, we didn't crash,
so that was a good start.

But she did manage to make it
all about her, though.

"Why do these things
always happen to me?

What am I gonna
tell your father?

What are we gonna tell
Keith and Marie from next door?"

Keith and Marie?

Fucking Keith and Marie.

You have no idea.
(GIGGLING)

And then she calls me up
the next day,

and she says "I've talked
about it with your father,

and we're fine."

That's good, right?

Yeah, I guess so.

But we've never really
talked about it since then.

I mean, we talk about it
a little bit,

but not really, and we definitely
never talk about relationships.

Has she ever met
any of your boyfriends?

Boyfriend.

I've only had one.

Oh, okay.

Did she meet him?

No.

He really wanted
to meet her,

'cause he's one of those
kids with PFLAG parents,

-but he never met mine.
-PFLAG?

Yeah, it's like parents
of lesbi--

I don't know, it's like if you...
love gays.

But I don't know, I don't want
to know about my parents' sex life,

so why do they need
to know about mine?

You know your parents
meeting one of your boyfriends

has nothing to do
with your sex life.

Yeah, no, I know.

It's more about them meeting
the person that you love...

- Yes. No, I get it.
-...you care about...

share everything with.

I don't know.

I feel like for parents, though,
it is about the sex.

Even if they are
meeting a boyfriend,

they're just imagining
that dick up your ass.

Your parents are
obsessed with sex, I think.

Maybe.

I think anyone's is.

You're like "I'm gay,"

and they're like "Oh,
so you're butt-fucking now?"

RICHIE: I like that San Francisco
is a place where gay sailors

used to come after
they got discharged from the Navy.

You know?

It's like imagine if
they knew that one day

they'd be able to get married
right here on the beach.

-It's crazy, huh?
-Yeah.

Do you want
to get married?

Why, are you asking?

Is that what this is?

I mean, hypothetically,
do you want to get married?

I don't know.
Do you?

Well, I know I don't want to
be like one of those crazies

who goes on two drunken dates
like in Badlands,

and runs to City Hall,

but yeah, I think so.

Me, too.

But then I think
about my sister.

She moved here to be
with her boyfriend,

and now she's
getting married.

That's awesome.

I don't know if she really wanted to
get married or if it's just because

she felt pressure
from everybody else to.

And now we've got to
deal with that pressure.

You think your mother would be happy
if you were married?

That's the thing.
I think she would.

She likes everything
to be normal.

And even if I were
getting married to a guy,

it would still make me
just like everybody else.

You worry about so much.

You don't?

I worry about...

...getting a paycheck,
paying my rent, but...

Not the big stuff?

That's what I got
my señora for.

- Your what?
-My señora.

Is that your grandma?

- That's my abuela.
-That's your abuela.

Wait, so the señora,
she rubs eggs all over your body

and then cracks them
into a bowl?

- Yep.
-ls she making a frittata?

No.

She reads the yolk

and tells you if
they are, like, bad vibes.

Do they have to be
organic eggs?

Then she reads the cards.

Okay, and tells you what?

Well, last time
she told me that

I would have no money,
but that I'd be happy.

Oh, and that I was
gonna get cancer.

But I was also
gonna have kids.

She told you you were
gonna have cancer?

That's so intense.

How many kids?

Two. Two girls.

How much does she
charge for this?

- Fifty bucks.
-Fifty bucks?

Wow.

No wonder she told you you're
not gonna have any money.

(TUTS)

Look, we all have our things
that sound dumb to others.

It helps me, okay?

Some people have pills,

other people have drugs.

Yeah, I don't mean
to be disrespectful,

but isn't it like taking
responsibility out of your hands?

- No.
-And worse than that,

putting it into
somebody else's?

You don't have
to listen to her.

Yeah, but the seed
is planted.

How often do you go?

Whenever I have
something to ask her.

Have you been
since you met me?

No.

I don't believe you.

- I haven't.
-Okay.

Okay, well, let's say that
you went since you met me.

What would you ask her?

I don't have anything
that I want to ask her.

What do you think
she'd say about me?

Let's just-- Let's just stop
talking about this.

We came all this way.

Let's just enjoy the view.

Okay.

It's nice.

It is nice,
I told you.

Does she supply
her own eggs?

I mean, I don't want to go

but I want to know
if she supplies her own eggs.

- Oh, my God.
-Does she?

No, we have
to bring them.

(SNIFFS)

So what's she
gonna ask me?

RICHIE: Nothing.

She's gonna
read your cards,

and then you have
to ask the questions.

Wait, I ask the questions?

You didn't tell me that.
What kind Of questions?

Whatever you want
to know about.

You can ask
about the future,

-about the past.
-The future.

You can ask her
about us.

If we're good together.
I know you want to know that.

Oh, God. I suddenly
got very nervous.

Why?

I don't know.
I'm freaking out.

I got goose bumps.

Maybe you're afraid she'll see
the real you in there.

(SCOFFS)

What if she says
something terrible,

like I'm a bad person?

- Are you?
-(WOMAN SPEAKING IN SPANISH)

Oh, my God,
why is she so upset?

(WOMAN CONTINUES IN SPANISH)

What'd she say?

She says she'll
be right with us.

Okay.

You don't know Spanish.

(ATTEMPTS TO SPEAK IN SPANISH)

The pencil sharpener
is red?

Is red, yeah.
And I can count to 13.

And I can tell her
I want to fuck her mother.

Yeah, you probably
shouldn't do that.

No, probably not.

Maybe I can translate.

You're gonna translate?

So she's gonna tell you
all the terrible things first?

I don't think
I'm okay with that.

(WOMAN SPEAKING IN SPANISH)

(REPLIES IN SPANISH)

Do you think
we should leave?

I don't know.
What do you think?

I mean,
we got the eggs.

Thanks for not making me
stay in there.

- I think it was the right choice.
-Yeah.

I think you're right.

Thanks for today.

It was fun.

Yeah, it was nice
just to hang out.

Can I tell you something?

Of course.

I was sort of
thinking about it today,

and I think it might
be cool with me

if you...

You want me to fuck you?

Yeah.

- Okay.
-But not today.

I feel like maybe
I opened up enough today.

If you know
what I mean.

But I do.
I want you to.

I promise.

Pato, it's fine.

I know. I just...
I wanted you to know.

Do you want to
fuck me instead?

Fuck, yeah.

(RUSTLING)

Ripped By mstoll
Happy New Year 2015 - New Year, New Color ;-)