Look (2010): Season 1, Episode 11 - Episode #1.11 - full transcript
(static)
- [Announcer] Previously on Look.
(chairs clang)
- You're not married are you?
- No.
(tape ripping)
- Ow!
- Good.
- What's going on with him?
What is this?
Ugh!
- You got arrested?
- Yes, I need you to get down here
and bail me the fuck out.
- What are you, crazy?
I'm with my family, how the
fuck am I gonna explain that?
- [Man On Phone] Meet him
down here to be my lawyer.
- That guy from the body
shop that fixed your bumper?
He called me.
- What, are you kidding me?
The court will appoint him
an attorney, all right?
- [Man] What happened in that
little private room, huh?
- She gave me a lap dance, that's all.
- You know I think I, I
think I forgot my phone.
- You promise to blur my
face out when this airs?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
(painball gun shooting)
- Get down fuckers!
- [Willie] Aw, fuck.
- There he is, rockstar.
I got five thousand for ya.
Let me rub some luck off on you
- Stop dad, stop.
- Give your old man one more hug, huh?
- [Man] Clear.
(shots fired)
(car approaching)
(water splashes)
(scoffs)
- I'll be home in about half an hour.
Why don't you meet me
there and we'll order in?
I got some nipple aids (laughs)
Okay, I'm going into the subway
so I'm gonna get cut off.
All right, I love you too.
I'll see you later, bye.
(ominous music)
(footsteps echo)
(sighs)
(sighs)
(sighs)
- Hello.
(train approaches)
(static)
(static)
(ominous music)
- You don't happen to have
change for a dollar, do ya?
Wanna get a paper.
- Oh yeah, sure.
- Thanks.
- No problem.
One second.
Oh I got another
(dramatic music)
(screams)
- Don't move, do not move!
(groans)
- Wait!
- You do exactly
what I say or I will plunge this knife
so deep into your throat.
- Okay, okay, please,
please don't hurt me.
- We're gonna go back in, come on, move!
- Please, please (screaming)
Help!
Help!
(squeals)
Help me!
(punches land)
(panting and groaning)
(subway car passes)
- (panting) Hello?
Oh my god, thank you so much!
Thank you, wait, wait,
how can I repay you?
Wait, stop, this is
wait, this is all the money I have!
Wait, what's your name?
- Are you all right?
Are you all right?
- [Woman] Stop!
- Did he do something to you?
- No, he saved me (panting).
Oh my god.
(rap music)
♪ I'm ready for this shit. ♪
♪ It's your boy J Black ♪
♪ Got a side street banger ♪
♪ She callin' out your name ♪
♪ Got big things poppin' on me ♪
♪ If you wanna hate ♪
- [Skater] My man, my man.
♪ People see you fake in the
streets you droppin' it ♪
♪ I would take your life
when it seems so beautiful ♪
♪ Now I could take your life
when it seems so beautiful ♪
- [Cameraman] Yeah man.
Go girl!
♪ I would take your life
when it seems so beautiful ♪
♪ I'm breathin' in this pass ♪
♪ No need for some oxygen ♪
♪ I'm breathin' in this pass ♪
♪ There's no reason for some oxygen ♪
♪ He missed the coke swimmin' ♪
♪ Smoke outta it, you got this shit ♪
♪ I heard this chick was hot ♪
♪ Let me think about it nevermind ♪
♪ She callin' out your name ♪
♪ Got big things poppin' on me ♪
♪ I'm a big nigga to
me you OGs are small ♪
♪ This for me ♪
♪ And this the lifestyle J adore ♪
♪ You think you whole but
wait until I bust 'em all ♪
♪ She callin' out your name ♪
♪ Got big things poppin' on me ♪
♪ If you wanna hate then
my gun I'm knockin' out ♪
♪ We can see you fake ♪
♪ In the streets you droppin' money ♪
♪ I will take your life
when you seem so beautiful ♪
- [Skater] What the fuck is goin' on?
♪ Now I could take your life
when it seems so beautiful ♪
♪ Now I would take your life
when it seems so beautiful ♪
(crowd cheering)
- [Passenger] No, no, no,
the one in the middle,
the one in the middle?
- [Driver] Yeah, no fuck that one,
get the one in the middle.
(passengers talking over each other)
- [Passenger] You guys.
- Eat this pussy!
(passengers cheering)
(paintball gun shooting)
(car crashes)
- Little mother fuckers.
Look at, fucking!
You gotta be fuckin' kidding me!
Look at-
Fuck!
(phone rings)
What!
- What the fuck is taking you so long?
- Oh fuck you Tom.
I am racing as fast as I can to get there.
- Is your husband with you?
- No I'm not with my fucking husband!
- We need him.
- Look, you don't even know
the hoops I had to jump through
to fucking get out of
the house without raising
major fucking suspicion.
Thank god my sister has a
history of mental illness.
Just shut up and sit the fuck down, okay?
(sighs) I've got the 10
grand to bail you out,
which is a whole nother fucking story
and to top it all off I just got shot
by fuckin' paint balls!
I will get there when
I get there, fuck you!
- Yes, dear.
(engine revs)
(wheels screeching)
(grunts)
(car beeping)
- Oh Jesus, mister are you okay?
Mister?
Are you dead?
Come on, wake up, wake up!
Oh shit.
(ominous music)
(gasps)
Fuck it.
- I'd be careful, now come on.
You're in a court, not a
Clancy's Pool room, sit down.
- I'm a victim of circumstance.
(smack)
- Who you hittin'?
Get goin'.
(chuckles)
(smack)
- [Television Narrator]
The scene of the case.
(sniffles)
(sighs)
- Bob?
Oh hey, sorry I came
as quickly as I could.
So what's the emergency?
Everybody all right?
Replace somebody?
- Danny, you and I have known
each other for a long time.
- Yes we have.
- Which is why I need to
show this to you personally.
- What is it?
- I consider you one of my best friends.
You were the only one there
for me when I was goin'
through some pretty tough
times with my gambling.
- That's what friends are for.
- Which is why it pains me
more than you can imagine
for me to have to show
you what our lead story's
gonna be at 6am.
(rap music)
(giggles)
- Who's gonna know?
(giggles)
(gasps)
(car zooming)
- Open up.
Muah!
Ah, oh my god.
- She's up on the table again you guys,
she's up on the fucking table.
Oh shit!
(people cheering)
- [Shane] Take it off!
- Show some tits, show 'em!
(cheering)
(laughter and cheering)
Damn.
- This bitch is leaving, she-
- Get down, get down!
This is a respectable family restaurant,
we can't tolerate that kind
of lewd behavior in here.
Welcome to Fantastic Burger,
may I take your order?
If you can't act like
young ladies and gentleman,
I'm gonna have to ask you to leave.
- Buzzkill.
- We're leaving, you're mean.
- We're really sorry,
it won't happen again.
- I'll see that it doesn't.
- [Man] Bitch!
(laughter)
- Anna, come here.
I decided I'm gonna go for it.
- Great, the fish sandwich?
- No, it!
I'm gonna do it with Shane
tonight, you're right
tonight's the night.
- We can't go anywhere
without gettin' in a fight.
We almost got kicked out again.
- Look at the kid behind you.
- Damn.
- Did you get all that?
- I got it all, I got everything,
I'll put it on fucking YouTube.
- His parents are out of town,
and I called my dad, and I
said I'm staying at your place
so cover for me if you can.
- It's about damn time.
And I talked to my dad
and told him I was staying
at your place, so we'll
cover for each other.
- My little Jew is finally gonna screw.
(laughter)
- I'm nervous.
No, don't be nervous.
- What if it hurts?
- All you gotta do is just in and out.
Just one time deal.
You're a worry wuss.
- Ow!
- Okay, what are we doing after this?
Where are we going, what are we-
- Hey guys, check out my handiwork, okay?
- Oh, let me see-
- I got it, I got it.
- Okay.
(group talks over each other)
Who's going paint balling?
I'm going.
You guys, I don't know-
(cash register printing)
- Thanks.
- That guy smelled like bubble gum.
(rap music)
♪ Go through the vein ♪
♪ Show deepness my insight not so plain ♪
(store bell dings)
- Booze, some chips, some Twinkies?
Can you get some Twinkies
if they have those?
I love Twinkies.
Do you know who I am?
- Yeah, you're Solo Bob.
- Do you know who I am?
- Solo Bob.
- I'm your biggest fucking fan.
I am your biggest fucking fan bro,
Willie Gains, right?
- You're kidding me, yeah.
- Dude, I caught your
YouTube video like, my girls
showed it to me, unbelievable.
Un fucking real.
It's that new fresh sound that like,
you hear about and you dream of finding.
And then it hits you one
day and you just like,
you don't know what happened to you.
But it was just like such a beautiful...
I was in my jacuzzi with
the girls and oh my god.
Like I had turned off the bubbles,
I turned up the juice.
It was un fucking believable.
Electro shock?
- Electrocuted, yeah.
- Electrocuted.
Yeah the video concept was
mine, I'm his manager Carl.
- Oh, hey.
- He's my assistant, he's not my manager.
- Right, that's good,
you should have that.
I mean the song's GFN, you
know it's good for now,
and it's a working title.
And you know what's so great about songs,
it's number one, it is
already number one in my mind.
I just know it.
I need maybe some Tylenol
and maybe some Alka Seltzer
cause I gotta relax 'cause I'm in pain.
'Cause it just shocked the shit out of me
or something, it's crazy.
- Are you fucking with me
man, are you kidding me?
- No dude, I swear.
Pull out your phone.
Let me give you my digits.
310, triple five, single
two, triple three,
and then a one at the
end of that, number one.
♪ I'm getting electrocuted ♪
Right?
- Are you fucking, this is crazy, man!
(phone rings)
- Well it sure seems
like he fits the profile
of a rape suspect we've been lookin' for.
And you're a very lucky woman.
Now, did you get this homeless man's name?
- No, he wouldn't even talk to me.
He just saved me and then
wandered off into the night.
That man is a hero, you need to find him
and give him a medal or something.
- Hi, I'm here to bail out Thomas Davis.
Thomas Davis!
- You guys, I don't know if there's room
for you bitches in the car.
- No, there's not room,
we're kickin' her ass out.
- I don't know if there's room,
not a big deal or anything.
- Dude, you should definitely go, like.
- No the hood-
- You guys, no, so who you gonna shoot?
No, you're not getting a paintball.
- I'm sitting across
from you to shoot you.
- You're not gonna shoot.
- Yes she is.
- Can I shoot you in the dick?
- No!
- You're not shooting.
- Yes she is.
- Can I shoot you in the dick?
- No!
- Yeah, you go like this, boom.
- No, no, no, you guys, come on.
- Fucking wolf,
I can't believe you would do that to me!
Fucking bitch!
How could you!
Bitch, god damn you.
I don't understand, why would you do that?
You're a fucking bitch, I hate you!
God damn it, fuck you, fuck you!
- What the fuck?
- [Blonde Girl] What the
fuck is your problem?
- Fuck you, and fuck you too!
- Damn, fuck.
- What the fuck just happened?
(camera rewinding)
- Don't tell anybody about this.
- [Shane] I won't.
- I mean it, Shane.
Especially that little bitch
girlfriend of yours, Molly.
- [Shane] Look, she's not my girlfriend.
- She thinks she is.
- [Shane] Yeah, well
she's a fucking idiot.
- She's still believes in
the first time being special
and the one and all that bullshit.
Make her think that you love
her, and fuck her already.
- [Shane] Let me work my magic, okay?
Enough about that little
bitch, let's make some porn.
(moaning)
- Fuck you and fuck you too!
- What the fuck just happened?
- She took the fucking tape.
- So?
- Yeah, well I might not
have changed the tape since-
- Asshole!
Molly, wait!
Fuck, Molly!
(phone drops)
Molly, wait!
Molly!
Molly!
(crying)
Molly, Molly, Molly, Molly, Molly wait!
Fuck.
So fucked.
(crying)
- Rough night?
- You have no idea.
- Wanna talk about it?
Cab drivers are kinda
like shrinks sometimes.
- You know what?
Fuck Molly, fuck the tape, fuck everybody.
I'm clearly way too
good to be brought down
by that little whore.
Let's go shoot the fuck out
of people with paint balls.
- Let's go you guys.
(camera fasts forward)
- Fuck you!
(car screeches)
(hip hop music)
(television plays in background)
- Can you bury it?
- Those were my thoughts at first.
But unfortunately this was
delivered to the tip desk
anonymously with a note attached to it
saying that it was gonna be distributed
to every news channel
and gossip site in town.
So we can't very well overlook it.
But I can promise you that
we will give you more respect
than any other station in town.
- All right, so what can I do?
Can I go on the air and apologize, or?
- I can't.
I can't put you back on the air, Dan.
You know that.
It's a family rated show.
Sex scandal's a sex scandal.
- Look, Bob.
Andy took me to this place,
I didn't even wanna go.
I mean, and that girl, you
know, she came on to me.
She was a groupie, I
didn't pay her anything,
I didn't give her any
money, you call Andy!
You ask Andy!
- I talked to Andy already.
Andy doesn't know
anything about this tape.
- Now remember, you
promise to blur my face out
when this airs.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- All right.
- Scout's honor.
- As far as he was concerned,
you had a lap dance and that was it.
He feels terrible about this.
He wanted to come in to try
and figure out a way to bury it
but I told him to stay home,
that I would talk with you.
- All right, so what do I do?
- You're gonna have to resign.
(gasps)
Don't make me fire you.
(scoffs)
You're gonna have to resign.
(scoffs)
(whimpers)
- Wait, wait, wait wait.
(television plays in the background)
(sobbing)
- Yeah, I had a pretty rough night myself.
Got attacked by a homeless guy.
- Oh my god, are you okay.
- Yeah, this bum just
came from out of nowhere.
Swinging, scratching, biting.
I couldn't fight back, I mean,
those guys are mentally ill.
He got a couple of good blows
in before he got away though.
- You should get a tetanus
shot, or rabies shot,
or whatever they do.
- Yeah, okay.
So what happened to you?
Boyfriend troubles?
- Boyfriend troubles.
Best friend troubles.
(grunts) I don't think I'll ever be able
to trust anybody ever again.
- Ah, so what I'm gathering here,
and correct me if I'm
wrong, is that your bitch
of a best friend, and
your dog of a boyfriend
hooked up behind your back, and
you just found out about it.
- Bingo (laughs)
- I'm kind of an amateur detective.
- Anyway, I'm here because I have a label,
I'm on Interscope Records
and they gave me an imprint.
Which means I can release
anything I wanna release.
So, I have marketing
money, you can put that on,
I have promo people,
MTV is like, you know,
up my ass, it's unbelievable.
It's like I wanna share
it with you because
I know you're that guy for me so, yeah.
It's a record deal, baby, yeah.
- It's fuckin' incredible,
this is fucking incredible man!
- What happens now?
What do I?
- No this is all on the house,
man, it's all on the house.
- It is?
- Everything, yeah, yeah.
Let me get you some bags.
- Cool, great, wow.
Thank you very much.
I got, you know what
your manager's a good man
and it's just a little signing bonus.
- The mere beginning.
- I mean, really I've gone
from artist to pie maker,
I make pies.
I don't take slices.
I make the pies.
Together we will make pies.
- Right on, man.
Right on.
Fucking unbelievable.
- It's so cool to be here
with you right now, man.
This is very exciting.
Sincere, I'm being as real
as I can right now dude.
It is very cool to be here.
Can you double bag it please?
Thanks.
- So you say you're a double bag man?
That's how you roll?
- It depends.
There's a show tonight
for U2, right ladies?
Bono invited us down so we're
really excited about that.
- What do I, how do I
get ahold of you, man?
- Here, I don't really do
this but for you I'm gonna
pull the card out.
I usually go digital
but let's just keep it
old school for a second.
- So I can just call this,
like, when should I call this?
- You can call Diane anytime you want.
- So I just call tomorrow
and I ask for Diane?
- Yes.
- And we'll talk again.
- Yeah, this is just the
beginning, I love you.
- Man, Bob, thank you.
- Seriously, I love you, dude.
- Thank you.
- All right.
- A pleasure.
- You too, have a good night.
- All right, man.
- Ladies, number one.
(store bell dings)
- It happened, man, it fuckin' happened!
- It did happen apparently.
- God!
- That was not a figment
of my imagination.
- It fuckin' happened!
- That's amazing.
- It happened!
- That's amazing, that's amazing!
- Oh my god!
It's the greatest fuckin' night ever man!
- It ain't bad!
- It happened, it happened!
(power cuts off)
♪ Every minute ♪
♪ Until we finally say we did it ♪
(music fades)
- Oh, crap.
(TV static)
(static)
- You gotta be shittin' me.
Another blackout.
- But this isn't my neighborhood,
I think you took a wrong turn somewhere.
- We're good.
Takin' a shortcut.
- I can't see where we are, it's so dark.
- You're home.
Right over there, 1822.
Look, all I can say is
any best friend that
treats you like that is
not a best friend at all.
Same goes for the boyfriend.
Though you know that they say,
all is fair in love and war.
And isn't it odd that the two
things that can make people
completely crazy on a mass
scale are love and war.
Both have a funny way of
bringing out the worst in people.
Chin up.
Don't let this boyfriend
turn you off to guys.
We're not all bad.
- Thanks.
You can keep the change.
- Thank you.
- It won't open.
(door slams)
(footprints on gravel)
(door opens)
- [Driver] Yeah. I really
gotta get that fixed.
(upbeat folk music)
(accordion effect)
- [Announcer] Previously on Look.
(chairs clang)
- You're not married are you?
- No.
(tape ripping)
- Ow!
- Good.
- What's going on with him?
What is this?
Ugh!
- You got arrested?
- Yes, I need you to get down here
and bail me the fuck out.
- What are you, crazy?
I'm with my family, how the
fuck am I gonna explain that?
- [Man On Phone] Meet him
down here to be my lawyer.
- That guy from the body
shop that fixed your bumper?
He called me.
- What, are you kidding me?
The court will appoint him
an attorney, all right?
- [Man] What happened in that
little private room, huh?
- She gave me a lap dance, that's all.
- You know I think I, I
think I forgot my phone.
- You promise to blur my
face out when this airs?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
(painball gun shooting)
- Get down fuckers!
- [Willie] Aw, fuck.
- There he is, rockstar.
I got five thousand for ya.
Let me rub some luck off on you
- Stop dad, stop.
- Give your old man one more hug, huh?
- [Man] Clear.
(shots fired)
(car approaching)
(water splashes)
(scoffs)
- I'll be home in about half an hour.
Why don't you meet me
there and we'll order in?
I got some nipple aids (laughs)
Okay, I'm going into the subway
so I'm gonna get cut off.
All right, I love you too.
I'll see you later, bye.
(ominous music)
(footsteps echo)
(sighs)
(sighs)
(sighs)
- Hello.
(train approaches)
(static)
(static)
(ominous music)
- You don't happen to have
change for a dollar, do ya?
Wanna get a paper.
- Oh yeah, sure.
- Thanks.
- No problem.
One second.
Oh I got another
(dramatic music)
(screams)
- Don't move, do not move!
(groans)
- Wait!
- You do exactly
what I say or I will plunge this knife
so deep into your throat.
- Okay, okay, please,
please don't hurt me.
- We're gonna go back in, come on, move!
- Please, please (screaming)
Help!
Help!
(squeals)
Help me!
(punches land)
(panting and groaning)
(subway car passes)
- (panting) Hello?
Oh my god, thank you so much!
Thank you, wait, wait,
how can I repay you?
Wait, stop, this is
wait, this is all the money I have!
Wait, what's your name?
- Are you all right?
Are you all right?
- [Woman] Stop!
- Did he do something to you?
- No, he saved me (panting).
Oh my god.
(rap music)
♪ I'm ready for this shit. ♪
♪ It's your boy J Black ♪
♪ Got a side street banger ♪
♪ She callin' out your name ♪
♪ Got big things poppin' on me ♪
♪ If you wanna hate ♪
- [Skater] My man, my man.
♪ People see you fake in the
streets you droppin' it ♪
♪ I would take your life
when it seems so beautiful ♪
♪ Now I could take your life
when it seems so beautiful ♪
- [Cameraman] Yeah man.
Go girl!
♪ I would take your life
when it seems so beautiful ♪
♪ I'm breathin' in this pass ♪
♪ No need for some oxygen ♪
♪ I'm breathin' in this pass ♪
♪ There's no reason for some oxygen ♪
♪ He missed the coke swimmin' ♪
♪ Smoke outta it, you got this shit ♪
♪ I heard this chick was hot ♪
♪ Let me think about it nevermind ♪
♪ She callin' out your name ♪
♪ Got big things poppin' on me ♪
♪ I'm a big nigga to
me you OGs are small ♪
♪ This for me ♪
♪ And this the lifestyle J adore ♪
♪ You think you whole but
wait until I bust 'em all ♪
♪ She callin' out your name ♪
♪ Got big things poppin' on me ♪
♪ If you wanna hate then
my gun I'm knockin' out ♪
♪ We can see you fake ♪
♪ In the streets you droppin' money ♪
♪ I will take your life
when you seem so beautiful ♪
- [Skater] What the fuck is goin' on?
♪ Now I could take your life
when it seems so beautiful ♪
♪ Now I would take your life
when it seems so beautiful ♪
(crowd cheering)
- [Passenger] No, no, no,
the one in the middle,
the one in the middle?
- [Driver] Yeah, no fuck that one,
get the one in the middle.
(passengers talking over each other)
- [Passenger] You guys.
- Eat this pussy!
(passengers cheering)
(paintball gun shooting)
(car crashes)
- Little mother fuckers.
Look at, fucking!
You gotta be fuckin' kidding me!
Look at-
Fuck!
(phone rings)
What!
- What the fuck is taking you so long?
- Oh fuck you Tom.
I am racing as fast as I can to get there.
- Is your husband with you?
- No I'm not with my fucking husband!
- We need him.
- Look, you don't even know
the hoops I had to jump through
to fucking get out of
the house without raising
major fucking suspicion.
Thank god my sister has a
history of mental illness.
Just shut up and sit the fuck down, okay?
(sighs) I've got the 10
grand to bail you out,
which is a whole nother fucking story
and to top it all off I just got shot
by fuckin' paint balls!
I will get there when
I get there, fuck you!
- Yes, dear.
(engine revs)
(wheels screeching)
(grunts)
(car beeping)
- Oh Jesus, mister are you okay?
Mister?
Are you dead?
Come on, wake up, wake up!
Oh shit.
(ominous music)
(gasps)
Fuck it.
- I'd be careful, now come on.
You're in a court, not a
Clancy's Pool room, sit down.
- I'm a victim of circumstance.
(smack)
- Who you hittin'?
Get goin'.
(chuckles)
(smack)
- [Television Narrator]
The scene of the case.
(sniffles)
(sighs)
- Bob?
Oh hey, sorry I came
as quickly as I could.
So what's the emergency?
Everybody all right?
Replace somebody?
- Danny, you and I have known
each other for a long time.
- Yes we have.
- Which is why I need to
show this to you personally.
- What is it?
- I consider you one of my best friends.
You were the only one there
for me when I was goin'
through some pretty tough
times with my gambling.
- That's what friends are for.
- Which is why it pains me
more than you can imagine
for me to have to show
you what our lead story's
gonna be at 6am.
(rap music)
(giggles)
- Who's gonna know?
(giggles)
(gasps)
(car zooming)
- Open up.
Muah!
Ah, oh my god.
- She's up on the table again you guys,
she's up on the fucking table.
Oh shit!
(people cheering)
- [Shane] Take it off!
- Show some tits, show 'em!
(cheering)
(laughter and cheering)
Damn.
- This bitch is leaving, she-
- Get down, get down!
This is a respectable family restaurant,
we can't tolerate that kind
of lewd behavior in here.
Welcome to Fantastic Burger,
may I take your order?
If you can't act like
young ladies and gentleman,
I'm gonna have to ask you to leave.
- Buzzkill.
- We're leaving, you're mean.
- We're really sorry,
it won't happen again.
- I'll see that it doesn't.
- [Man] Bitch!
(laughter)
- Anna, come here.
I decided I'm gonna go for it.
- Great, the fish sandwich?
- No, it!
I'm gonna do it with Shane
tonight, you're right
tonight's the night.
- We can't go anywhere
without gettin' in a fight.
We almost got kicked out again.
- Look at the kid behind you.
- Damn.
- Did you get all that?
- I got it all, I got everything,
I'll put it on fucking YouTube.
- His parents are out of town,
and I called my dad, and I
said I'm staying at your place
so cover for me if you can.
- It's about damn time.
And I talked to my dad
and told him I was staying
at your place, so we'll
cover for each other.
- My little Jew is finally gonna screw.
(laughter)
- I'm nervous.
No, don't be nervous.
- What if it hurts?
- All you gotta do is just in and out.
Just one time deal.
You're a worry wuss.
- Ow!
- Okay, what are we doing after this?
Where are we going, what are we-
- Hey guys, check out my handiwork, okay?
- Oh, let me see-
- I got it, I got it.
- Okay.
(group talks over each other)
Who's going paint balling?
I'm going.
You guys, I don't know-
(cash register printing)
- Thanks.
- That guy smelled like bubble gum.
(rap music)
♪ Go through the vein ♪
♪ Show deepness my insight not so plain ♪
(store bell dings)
- Booze, some chips, some Twinkies?
Can you get some Twinkies
if they have those?
I love Twinkies.
Do you know who I am?
- Yeah, you're Solo Bob.
- Do you know who I am?
- Solo Bob.
- I'm your biggest fucking fan.
I am your biggest fucking fan bro,
Willie Gains, right?
- You're kidding me, yeah.
- Dude, I caught your
YouTube video like, my girls
showed it to me, unbelievable.
Un fucking real.
It's that new fresh sound that like,
you hear about and you dream of finding.
And then it hits you one
day and you just like,
you don't know what happened to you.
But it was just like such a beautiful...
I was in my jacuzzi with
the girls and oh my god.
Like I had turned off the bubbles,
I turned up the juice.
It was un fucking believable.
Electro shock?
- Electrocuted, yeah.
- Electrocuted.
Yeah the video concept was
mine, I'm his manager Carl.
- Oh, hey.
- He's my assistant, he's not my manager.
- Right, that's good,
you should have that.
I mean the song's GFN, you
know it's good for now,
and it's a working title.
And you know what's so great about songs,
it's number one, it is
already number one in my mind.
I just know it.
I need maybe some Tylenol
and maybe some Alka Seltzer
cause I gotta relax 'cause I'm in pain.
'Cause it just shocked the shit out of me
or something, it's crazy.
- Are you fucking with me
man, are you kidding me?
- No dude, I swear.
Pull out your phone.
Let me give you my digits.
310, triple five, single
two, triple three,
and then a one at the
end of that, number one.
♪ I'm getting electrocuted ♪
Right?
- Are you fucking, this is crazy, man!
(phone rings)
- Well it sure seems
like he fits the profile
of a rape suspect we've been lookin' for.
And you're a very lucky woman.
Now, did you get this homeless man's name?
- No, he wouldn't even talk to me.
He just saved me and then
wandered off into the night.
That man is a hero, you need to find him
and give him a medal or something.
- Hi, I'm here to bail out Thomas Davis.
Thomas Davis!
- You guys, I don't know if there's room
for you bitches in the car.
- No, there's not room,
we're kickin' her ass out.
- I don't know if there's room,
not a big deal or anything.
- Dude, you should definitely go, like.
- No the hood-
- You guys, no, so who you gonna shoot?
No, you're not getting a paintball.
- I'm sitting across
from you to shoot you.
- You're not gonna shoot.
- Yes she is.
- Can I shoot you in the dick?
- No!
- You're not shooting.
- Yes she is.
- Can I shoot you in the dick?
- No!
- Yeah, you go like this, boom.
- No, no, no, you guys, come on.
- Fucking wolf,
I can't believe you would do that to me!
Fucking bitch!
How could you!
Bitch, god damn you.
I don't understand, why would you do that?
You're a fucking bitch, I hate you!
God damn it, fuck you, fuck you!
- What the fuck?
- [Blonde Girl] What the
fuck is your problem?
- Fuck you, and fuck you too!
- Damn, fuck.
- What the fuck just happened?
(camera rewinding)
- Don't tell anybody about this.
- [Shane] I won't.
- I mean it, Shane.
Especially that little bitch
girlfriend of yours, Molly.
- [Shane] Look, she's not my girlfriend.
- She thinks she is.
- [Shane] Yeah, well
she's a fucking idiot.
- She's still believes in
the first time being special
and the one and all that bullshit.
Make her think that you love
her, and fuck her already.
- [Shane] Let me work my magic, okay?
Enough about that little
bitch, let's make some porn.
(moaning)
- Fuck you and fuck you too!
- What the fuck just happened?
- She took the fucking tape.
- So?
- Yeah, well I might not
have changed the tape since-
- Asshole!
Molly, wait!
Fuck, Molly!
(phone drops)
Molly, wait!
Molly!
Molly!
(crying)
Molly, Molly, Molly, Molly, Molly wait!
Fuck.
So fucked.
(crying)
- Rough night?
- You have no idea.
- Wanna talk about it?
Cab drivers are kinda
like shrinks sometimes.
- You know what?
Fuck Molly, fuck the tape, fuck everybody.
I'm clearly way too
good to be brought down
by that little whore.
Let's go shoot the fuck out
of people with paint balls.
- Let's go you guys.
(camera fasts forward)
- Fuck you!
(car screeches)
(hip hop music)
(television plays in background)
- Can you bury it?
- Those were my thoughts at first.
But unfortunately this was
delivered to the tip desk
anonymously with a note attached to it
saying that it was gonna be distributed
to every news channel
and gossip site in town.
So we can't very well overlook it.
But I can promise you that
we will give you more respect
than any other station in town.
- All right, so what can I do?
Can I go on the air and apologize, or?
- I can't.
I can't put you back on the air, Dan.
You know that.
It's a family rated show.
Sex scandal's a sex scandal.
- Look, Bob.
Andy took me to this place,
I didn't even wanna go.
I mean, and that girl, you
know, she came on to me.
She was a groupie, I
didn't pay her anything,
I didn't give her any
money, you call Andy!
You ask Andy!
- I talked to Andy already.
Andy doesn't know
anything about this tape.
- Now remember, you
promise to blur my face out
when this airs.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- All right.
- Scout's honor.
- As far as he was concerned,
you had a lap dance and that was it.
He feels terrible about this.
He wanted to come in to try
and figure out a way to bury it
but I told him to stay home,
that I would talk with you.
- All right, so what do I do?
- You're gonna have to resign.
(gasps)
Don't make me fire you.
(scoffs)
You're gonna have to resign.
(scoffs)
(whimpers)
- Wait, wait, wait wait.
(television plays in the background)
(sobbing)
- Yeah, I had a pretty rough night myself.
Got attacked by a homeless guy.
- Oh my god, are you okay.
- Yeah, this bum just
came from out of nowhere.
Swinging, scratching, biting.
I couldn't fight back, I mean,
those guys are mentally ill.
He got a couple of good blows
in before he got away though.
- You should get a tetanus
shot, or rabies shot,
or whatever they do.
- Yeah, okay.
So what happened to you?
Boyfriend troubles?
- Boyfriend troubles.
Best friend troubles.
(grunts) I don't think I'll ever be able
to trust anybody ever again.
- Ah, so what I'm gathering here,
and correct me if I'm
wrong, is that your bitch
of a best friend, and
your dog of a boyfriend
hooked up behind your back, and
you just found out about it.
- Bingo (laughs)
- I'm kind of an amateur detective.
- Anyway, I'm here because I have a label,
I'm on Interscope Records
and they gave me an imprint.
Which means I can release
anything I wanna release.
So, I have marketing
money, you can put that on,
I have promo people,
MTV is like, you know,
up my ass, it's unbelievable.
It's like I wanna share
it with you because
I know you're that guy for me so, yeah.
It's a record deal, baby, yeah.
- It's fuckin' incredible,
this is fucking incredible man!
- What happens now?
What do I?
- No this is all on the house,
man, it's all on the house.
- It is?
- Everything, yeah, yeah.
Let me get you some bags.
- Cool, great, wow.
Thank you very much.
I got, you know what
your manager's a good man
and it's just a little signing bonus.
- The mere beginning.
- I mean, really I've gone
from artist to pie maker,
I make pies.
I don't take slices.
I make the pies.
Together we will make pies.
- Right on, man.
Right on.
Fucking unbelievable.
- It's so cool to be here
with you right now, man.
This is very exciting.
Sincere, I'm being as real
as I can right now dude.
It is very cool to be here.
Can you double bag it please?
Thanks.
- So you say you're a double bag man?
That's how you roll?
- It depends.
There's a show tonight
for U2, right ladies?
Bono invited us down so we're
really excited about that.
- What do I, how do I
get ahold of you, man?
- Here, I don't really do
this but for you I'm gonna
pull the card out.
I usually go digital
but let's just keep it
old school for a second.
- So I can just call this,
like, when should I call this?
- You can call Diane anytime you want.
- So I just call tomorrow
and I ask for Diane?
- Yes.
- And we'll talk again.
- Yeah, this is just the
beginning, I love you.
- Man, Bob, thank you.
- Seriously, I love you, dude.
- Thank you.
- All right.
- A pleasure.
- You too, have a good night.
- All right, man.
- Ladies, number one.
(store bell dings)
- It happened, man, it fuckin' happened!
- It did happen apparently.
- God!
- That was not a figment
of my imagination.
- It fuckin' happened!
- That's amazing.
- It happened!
- That's amazing, that's amazing!
- Oh my god!
It's the greatest fuckin' night ever man!
- It ain't bad!
- It happened, it happened!
(power cuts off)
♪ Every minute ♪
♪ Until we finally say we did it ♪
(music fades)
- Oh, crap.
(TV static)
(static)
- You gotta be shittin' me.
Another blackout.
- But this isn't my neighborhood,
I think you took a wrong turn somewhere.
- We're good.
Takin' a shortcut.
- I can't see where we are, it's so dark.
- You're home.
Right over there, 1822.
Look, all I can say is
any best friend that
treats you like that is
not a best friend at all.
Same goes for the boyfriend.
Though you know that they say,
all is fair in love and war.
And isn't it odd that the two
things that can make people
completely crazy on a mass
scale are love and war.
Both have a funny way of
bringing out the worst in people.
Chin up.
Don't let this boyfriend
turn you off to guys.
We're not all bad.
- Thanks.
You can keep the change.
- Thank you.
- It won't open.
(door slams)
(footprints on gravel)
(door opens)
- [Driver] Yeah. I really
gotta get that fixed.
(upbeat folk music)
(accordion effect)