Lockie Leonard (2007–2010): Season 1, Episode 26 - Joy... To the World - full transcript
It's the last day of school and Vicki drops a bombshell: she won't be coming back to Angelus High next year. In fact, she's leaving Angelus altogether to go to boarding school. The Leonard family awaits Mum's return from hospital in time for Christmas, Phillip's nightmare nears an end, and volunteers lineup to help Rev Egg put on his Christmas Rock Opera.
- Hear that noise?
It's kids, cheering.
Why?
Because these are the final moments
of the last day of the school year.
It's the sound of freedom.
Well, for some of us, it is.
All the other teachers
have packed their pens
and told their classes to scram.
But not old Squasher.
Old Squasher is taking this
right down to the wire.
As in "provide a written
self-assessment of your development
this year."
Well, what can I say?
Vicki was a development.
Big time!
As in my first ever girlfriend
Vicki also became the first
girl to dump me twice!
And where are Vicki and me now?
We're in a kind of limbo land.
- Halt!
Did I say anyone could leave?
Class dismissed.
Don't forget to empty out your lockers!
- Free!
Free at last!
- Savour the moment because
we are about to say goodbye to
Angelus High for the next
six and a half weeks.
- Or forever in my case.
- What do you mean?
- I'll be going to boarding
school in the city next year.
- When was this decided?
- Dad's trying to turn over a new leaf.
Thinking more about his family.
- By sending you away?
- It's my decision too.
- But you can't go, you can't.
- Why not?
- 'Cause I cant stop thinking about you.
And even though you think we're history,
I reckon we belong together.
- Yeah, why not, Lockie?
- Go on, say it.
Forget about the pain and all
the hurt and the misery we
went through and just say
I
- I've got to go, it's my mum.
- I'll see you around maybe.
- Looking good, Lockie.
- Sorry?
What's looking good.
- My widdle-ometer.
- The doc reckons if I can reach
six widdle-free nights in a
row, I'll be cured.
Lockie!
- Can you believe it?
The last box in my week
is December the 25th.
So when the sun rises on Christmas morning
my bed-wetting nightmare
will finally be over.
- That's ace, Philip.
Good luck.
- Lockie, What good a Christmas
present would it be for Mum
when she gets home.
- Could I have a word.
Lockie, I don't want to break
this news to Philip as yet,
seeing as he's doing so
well with his widdle-ometer.
- What?
- I think you should prepare
yourself for the fact that, em,
Mum may not make it home for Christmas.
- But she's been doing so well lately.
- I know and we want her
to continue to do well.
So does she.
But the Christmas season isn't
exactly a stress-free time.
for someone like your mother.
Given that she has the
admirable quality of
wanting everything to be, well, perfect.
Who could forget the great
Christmas pudding debacle of last
year?
- Oops!
- Or the year before that.
- Sorry!
- Yeah.
- Or the year before that.
- Let's not tempt fate.
Let's start thinking of ways
to make this the best Christmas
ever.
Just at the hospital.
Listen, Philip, might
be an idea if we, em,
soft pedal a little bit on
the whole Christmas thing.
Just take it a little bit easy.
- Just don't make too much of it, okay?
You know how stressed Mum can get
about all the cooking and work and stuff.
- Good thinking.
We all remember the great
Christmas pudding debacles,
don't we?
- Exactly.
I'm not saying don't mention
the subject of Christmas,
just don't dwell on it.
Jolly good.
Lovely!
- Here's everybody.
This is nice.
- What's all this, then?
- I'm making Christmas
decorations out of toilet rolls.
- Christmas decorations?
- Hello, boys.
- Isn't it lovely and Christmas-y, Mum.
Someone's gone to a lot of work.
- Yes.
Which reminds me,
Christmas shopping, Sarge,
have you ordered the ham?
- Tomorrow, yeah, um.
I'll definitely do that tomorrow.
- We usually leave all that to you, Mum.
- Yes, I know.
And if I'm going to be home for Christmas,
I'd better start making some lists.
Has anybody thought
about the Christmas pudding?
- No, I don't really care
about Christmas pudding.
- Never liked it.
- Aw!
Look at all these sad faces.
Come on.
Cheer up.
I'm gonna be home really soon.
- Soon, but when?
And with Vicki about to leave town,
this was to be the worst Christmas ever.
Not that anyone had told Monster that.
- So what you doing, Col?
- This is gonna be the
best surprise for Dad.
- I bet.
Vicki, I love Christmas, don't you?
- Yeah, it's when you get
everything you've always wanted,
isn't it?
- Only if you've been good.
- Yeah, I guess that's my problem.
I just haven't been good enough.
- But it's Christmas, Dad.
It's the biggest week of the whole year.
- I realise that it is indeed my task
to bring the joyful message
of Christmas to the world.
But I don't mind saying,
this year is gonna be a bit of an ask.
- Is this about you and Mum.
What about your Christmas rock opera?
You've been working on it all year.
- Right now, I don't know
if I have the music in me,
let alone the spirit of Christmas.
- Dad, I've heard it!
I think it's some of your best work.
- Nice try, son.
Another year, perhaps.
- So that's how Sarge, Philip
and I ended up at Eggs place.
After we'd said goodbye to Mum.
- We got the message.
Something about a hit musical?
Had to find out what that was all about.
Singing required, is it?
- Sorry, Dad, Christmas
isn't about your feelings.
Your gig is to be the opening
act for the biggest star of
them all.
- Good afternoon, Reverend.
- G'day.
- I understand you're looking
for volunteers to perform
selfless acts of charity
for the community at large.
- Yes, indeed!
Come one, come all!
- I've taken a good,
hard look at myself, Rev.
I've asked myself the tough questions
and I don't like what I'm seeing.
If it's humility you're
after, I'm your man!
- Seeing Vicki's Dad made me
realise how much I'd missed
Vicki.
- Lights up to reveal the Christ born.
Asleep in Mary's arms
Enter stage left, Three Wise Men.
Solid Gold, 50 Cent and MOR.
- Question.
Sorry, Rev, shouldn't
that be frankincense?
I'm sure they brought gold,
frankincense and myrrh.
- No, I think you'll find
it's a cunning play on words,
Barry.
Solid Gold is obviously disco.
50 Cent is a hardcore rapper.
MOR Middle of the Road.
Easy listening.
- Excuse me?
- Well, the Three Wise Men
have followed the Star Of
Bethlehem to the stable and
they're each to present their
gift through music to the baby Jesus.
But where will we find the talent?
- Well, I could dust off my
white suit for the disco, I
suppose.
What about you, Barry?
- Singing?
I don't think so, no.
No, I rather thought my role
on the night would be to wash
the feet of the audience as
they come in, as an act of
self-abasement.
- And we still need to
find a hardcore-rap artist.
- Every time I looked at Mr Streeton
I thought about Vicki at boarding school
and me not seeing her for months on end.
I had to talk to her.
- Of course, Rev, if you
think I'm up to the task
then I'm only too willing to
give give Elton John a shot.
- Mr Streeton.
- Yes, Lenny.
- I remember Vicki saying
once that Mrs Streeton
used to collect disco albums.
And I was wondering, maybe
if I came home with you now,
I could borrow some.
So Sarge can nail his
part in the rock opera.
- My goodness!
Would you look at that, Larry?
- I love you, Dad.
Are you pleased, do you like it?
Wait till you see it all lit up!
This is going to be the best
Christmas ever, isn't it?
- Yes, Colin.
It's, it's very, very Christmas-y.
Vicki, Lukeys here.
- So, tell me about this boarding school.
- What's to tell?
It's a lady's college,
we've got a better uniform.
- Lots of snooty rich girls, I suppose.
- Dad reckons it's the best
education money can buy.
- Do you really want to go?
- Sure, why not?
- Yeah, absolutely why not?
Crash through the pain barrier, Lockie.
Say something!
Anyway, we've still got all holidays.
You know, if you wanted to do stuff.
- Well, we haven't really.
- We haven't?
- Dad's taking us on a family holiday.
It's the first time we've
all been away in 12 years.
- When do you leave?
- Boxing Day.
- But that's next week!
- Gee, is it really, I'd better go pack.
- How long's your holiday?
- Six weeks.
- But what about.
I so much wanted to say "us".
- What about what?
- What about watering your
plants while you're gone?
I can do that.
- Sure.
- Look, are you cool with
this boarding school--
- Yes, Lockie!
I'm cool with this.
My family is back together, thanks to you,
and were the happiest we've been in years.
We're all really, really happy.
- No wonder Vicki was upset with me.
All I had to do was give
her one reason to stay,
but I'd blown it, my last
chance, down the toilet.
But then I had an idea.
What if I left something in Vicki's room
so she'd have to come and
see me again and return it?
- You're so right, Geoff.
If I cant have a bit of fun
this week, I'm in the wrong job.
Mr Squasher.
- Rumour has it you're looking
for spare hands for the rock
opera?
And since, with the
school year finished, I
find very little to while away the hours
in the squalid boarding house I call home.
I'd like to offer my services.
- Lockie, I don't know
how to say this to Sarge,
but I reckon Mum wont be
home in time for Christmas.
- What?
No, of course she will.
- Night, Lockie.
- Night, Philip.
- Night, Mum.
- Night, boys.
- Night, Sarge.
- Night, soul-groovers.
- Night, Vicki.
Over the next five days we
gave Revs Christmas rock opera
our all.
And before we knew it,
it was Christmas Eve.
And Sarge had gone to the
hospital to see if Mum could come
home.
- You left something at my place.
- Did I?
What was that?
Right, my sherbet.
I've been looking everywhere for that.
- Must be important for you
to leave a note with it.
- It's pretty special, yeah.
I've really been missing it.
- "If found, please
contact Lachlan Leonard,
87 Swamp Road, Angelus.
Reward if returned."
So, wheres my reward?
- Would you like to have my sherbet?
- Would you really give me
something as precious to you as
all that?
- I'd give you everything if I could.
- Look, Lockie.
About the boarding-school thing,
things have been a lot happier at home
since my brothers been
back living with us.
- That's good.
- I'm not so angry with my dad anymore.
Which means I feel I've
got to along with things
when he's trying to do
what's right for me.
I just want to go back to
us fighting all the time.
You've got no idea how
lucky you are, Lockie.
You haven't got the slightest idea.
- Mum!
- Where's Mum?
- Is she coming home?
But the show must go on.
My job was to help Monster
who'd done a great job
with the lighting design.
- And Mary brought
forth her first-born son
and wrapped him in swaddling clothes
and laid him in a manger because
there was no room for them
at the inn.
Meanwhile local shepherds
attended their flock
when an angel appeared,
telling them, "Dont be afraid.
I bring news of joy.
For today, there is born to you
and all people, a Saviour."
- Okay, Monster, cue
the Star Of Bethlehem.
- Here she comes, go baby, go.
Power cut, no, no, no!
I've overloaded the system!
- There cant be a power cut, look.
- Not possible, we don't have any power.
- It's a miracle!
- The Three Wise Men have
followed the Star Of Bethlehem
to the lowly music stable
where they are each to present
their gift of song to the baby Jesus.
- Bounce, bounce, bounce, yo!
I'm talking about the mayhem in Bethlehem.
- We got power back.
- Revs rock opera was going
off, but all of a sudden, I felt
like I was a million miles
away, watching the whole thing
through the wrong end of a telescope.
I just had this silly hope in my head
that I would turn around
and there would be Mum,
coming in through the door at
the back of the hall to join
us all.
But I guess we'd already
had our miracle for the
night.
- And now, ladies and
gentlemen, boys and girls,
join me, please, as we sing
that most beautiful of Christmas carols
- Do you need a hug?
Why don't you just ask me for one?
You know, Lockie, sometimes
it's better to say things with
your mouth than just think
them in your head all the time.
I've been watching you go
through all this stuff with your
mum.
I think you're doing an awesome job.
I think you're a total legend, Lockie.
- I need that hug, please.
If it's still okay.
Actually, Vicki, there is
something I want to say.
I don't want you going off to
any stupid boarding school.
I don't care what you have to do.
I want you to stay here.
- Well, you took your time saying that.
I suppose I could talk to Dad about it.
But why do you want me to stay?
- Because I love you.
- And that took even longer!
- Why should Christmas Day
be different to any other
morning?
So, I went surfing.
Mum, is that you?
Mum, are you actually real?
- Come on, slacker, hurry up!
- I don't believe it!
- Lockie, I'm for good.
- Sarge was right.
It was the best Christmas
ever!
It's kids, cheering.
Why?
Because these are the final moments
of the last day of the school year.
It's the sound of freedom.
Well, for some of us, it is.
All the other teachers
have packed their pens
and told their classes to scram.
But not old Squasher.
Old Squasher is taking this
right down to the wire.
As in "provide a written
self-assessment of your development
this year."
Well, what can I say?
Vicki was a development.
Big time!
As in my first ever girlfriend
Vicki also became the first
girl to dump me twice!
And where are Vicki and me now?
We're in a kind of limbo land.
- Halt!
Did I say anyone could leave?
Class dismissed.
Don't forget to empty out your lockers!
- Free!
Free at last!
- Savour the moment because
we are about to say goodbye to
Angelus High for the next
six and a half weeks.
- Or forever in my case.
- What do you mean?
- I'll be going to boarding
school in the city next year.
- When was this decided?
- Dad's trying to turn over a new leaf.
Thinking more about his family.
- By sending you away?
- It's my decision too.
- But you can't go, you can't.
- Why not?
- 'Cause I cant stop thinking about you.
And even though you think we're history,
I reckon we belong together.
- Yeah, why not, Lockie?
- Go on, say it.
Forget about the pain and all
the hurt and the misery we
went through and just say
I
- I've got to go, it's my mum.
- I'll see you around maybe.
- Looking good, Lockie.
- Sorry?
What's looking good.
- My widdle-ometer.
- The doc reckons if I can reach
six widdle-free nights in a
row, I'll be cured.
Lockie!
- Can you believe it?
The last box in my week
is December the 25th.
So when the sun rises on Christmas morning
my bed-wetting nightmare
will finally be over.
- That's ace, Philip.
Good luck.
- Lockie, What good a Christmas
present would it be for Mum
when she gets home.
- Could I have a word.
Lockie, I don't want to break
this news to Philip as yet,
seeing as he's doing so
well with his widdle-ometer.
- What?
- I think you should prepare
yourself for the fact that, em,
Mum may not make it home for Christmas.
- But she's been doing so well lately.
- I know and we want her
to continue to do well.
So does she.
But the Christmas season isn't
exactly a stress-free time.
for someone like your mother.
Given that she has the
admirable quality of
wanting everything to be, well, perfect.
Who could forget the great
Christmas pudding debacle of last
year?
- Oops!
- Or the year before that.
- Sorry!
- Yeah.
- Or the year before that.
- Let's not tempt fate.
Let's start thinking of ways
to make this the best Christmas
ever.
Just at the hospital.
Listen, Philip, might
be an idea if we, em,
soft pedal a little bit on
the whole Christmas thing.
Just take it a little bit easy.
- Just don't make too much of it, okay?
You know how stressed Mum can get
about all the cooking and work and stuff.
- Good thinking.
We all remember the great
Christmas pudding debacles,
don't we?
- Exactly.
I'm not saying don't mention
the subject of Christmas,
just don't dwell on it.
Jolly good.
Lovely!
- Here's everybody.
This is nice.
- What's all this, then?
- I'm making Christmas
decorations out of toilet rolls.
- Christmas decorations?
- Hello, boys.
- Isn't it lovely and Christmas-y, Mum.
Someone's gone to a lot of work.
- Yes.
Which reminds me,
Christmas shopping, Sarge,
have you ordered the ham?
- Tomorrow, yeah, um.
I'll definitely do that tomorrow.
- We usually leave all that to you, Mum.
- Yes, I know.
And if I'm going to be home for Christmas,
I'd better start making some lists.
Has anybody thought
about the Christmas pudding?
- No, I don't really care
about Christmas pudding.
- Never liked it.
- Aw!
Look at all these sad faces.
Come on.
Cheer up.
I'm gonna be home really soon.
- Soon, but when?
And with Vicki about to leave town,
this was to be the worst Christmas ever.
Not that anyone had told Monster that.
- So what you doing, Col?
- This is gonna be the
best surprise for Dad.
- I bet.
Vicki, I love Christmas, don't you?
- Yeah, it's when you get
everything you've always wanted,
isn't it?
- Only if you've been good.
- Yeah, I guess that's my problem.
I just haven't been good enough.
- But it's Christmas, Dad.
It's the biggest week of the whole year.
- I realise that it is indeed my task
to bring the joyful message
of Christmas to the world.
But I don't mind saying,
this year is gonna be a bit of an ask.
- Is this about you and Mum.
What about your Christmas rock opera?
You've been working on it all year.
- Right now, I don't know
if I have the music in me,
let alone the spirit of Christmas.
- Dad, I've heard it!
I think it's some of your best work.
- Nice try, son.
Another year, perhaps.
- So that's how Sarge, Philip
and I ended up at Eggs place.
After we'd said goodbye to Mum.
- We got the message.
Something about a hit musical?
Had to find out what that was all about.
Singing required, is it?
- Sorry, Dad, Christmas
isn't about your feelings.
Your gig is to be the opening
act for the biggest star of
them all.
- Good afternoon, Reverend.
- G'day.
- I understand you're looking
for volunteers to perform
selfless acts of charity
for the community at large.
- Yes, indeed!
Come one, come all!
- I've taken a good,
hard look at myself, Rev.
I've asked myself the tough questions
and I don't like what I'm seeing.
If it's humility you're
after, I'm your man!
- Seeing Vicki's Dad made me
realise how much I'd missed
Vicki.
- Lights up to reveal the Christ born.
Asleep in Mary's arms
Enter stage left, Three Wise Men.
Solid Gold, 50 Cent and MOR.
- Question.
Sorry, Rev, shouldn't
that be frankincense?
I'm sure they brought gold,
frankincense and myrrh.
- No, I think you'll find
it's a cunning play on words,
Barry.
Solid Gold is obviously disco.
50 Cent is a hardcore rapper.
MOR Middle of the Road.
Easy listening.
- Excuse me?
- Well, the Three Wise Men
have followed the Star Of
Bethlehem to the stable and
they're each to present their
gift through music to the baby Jesus.
But where will we find the talent?
- Well, I could dust off my
white suit for the disco, I
suppose.
What about you, Barry?
- Singing?
I don't think so, no.
No, I rather thought my role
on the night would be to wash
the feet of the audience as
they come in, as an act of
self-abasement.
- And we still need to
find a hardcore-rap artist.
- Every time I looked at Mr Streeton
I thought about Vicki at boarding school
and me not seeing her for months on end.
I had to talk to her.
- Of course, Rev, if you
think I'm up to the task
then I'm only too willing to
give give Elton John a shot.
- Mr Streeton.
- Yes, Lenny.
- I remember Vicki saying
once that Mrs Streeton
used to collect disco albums.
And I was wondering, maybe
if I came home with you now,
I could borrow some.
So Sarge can nail his
part in the rock opera.
- My goodness!
Would you look at that, Larry?
- I love you, Dad.
Are you pleased, do you like it?
Wait till you see it all lit up!
This is going to be the best
Christmas ever, isn't it?
- Yes, Colin.
It's, it's very, very Christmas-y.
Vicki, Lukeys here.
- So, tell me about this boarding school.
- What's to tell?
It's a lady's college,
we've got a better uniform.
- Lots of snooty rich girls, I suppose.
- Dad reckons it's the best
education money can buy.
- Do you really want to go?
- Sure, why not?
- Yeah, absolutely why not?
Crash through the pain barrier, Lockie.
Say something!
Anyway, we've still got all holidays.
You know, if you wanted to do stuff.
- Well, we haven't really.
- We haven't?
- Dad's taking us on a family holiday.
It's the first time we've
all been away in 12 years.
- When do you leave?
- Boxing Day.
- But that's next week!
- Gee, is it really, I'd better go pack.
- How long's your holiday?
- Six weeks.
- But what about.
I so much wanted to say "us".
- What about what?
- What about watering your
plants while you're gone?
I can do that.
- Sure.
- Look, are you cool with
this boarding school--
- Yes, Lockie!
I'm cool with this.
My family is back together, thanks to you,
and were the happiest we've been in years.
We're all really, really happy.
- No wonder Vicki was upset with me.
All I had to do was give
her one reason to stay,
but I'd blown it, my last
chance, down the toilet.
But then I had an idea.
What if I left something in Vicki's room
so she'd have to come and
see me again and return it?
- You're so right, Geoff.
If I cant have a bit of fun
this week, I'm in the wrong job.
Mr Squasher.
- Rumour has it you're looking
for spare hands for the rock
opera?
And since, with the
school year finished, I
find very little to while away the hours
in the squalid boarding house I call home.
I'd like to offer my services.
- Lockie, I don't know
how to say this to Sarge,
but I reckon Mum wont be
home in time for Christmas.
- What?
No, of course she will.
- Night, Lockie.
- Night, Philip.
- Night, Mum.
- Night, boys.
- Night, Sarge.
- Night, soul-groovers.
- Night, Vicki.
Over the next five days we
gave Revs Christmas rock opera
our all.
And before we knew it,
it was Christmas Eve.
And Sarge had gone to the
hospital to see if Mum could come
home.
- You left something at my place.
- Did I?
What was that?
Right, my sherbet.
I've been looking everywhere for that.
- Must be important for you
to leave a note with it.
- It's pretty special, yeah.
I've really been missing it.
- "If found, please
contact Lachlan Leonard,
87 Swamp Road, Angelus.
Reward if returned."
So, wheres my reward?
- Would you like to have my sherbet?
- Would you really give me
something as precious to you as
all that?
- I'd give you everything if I could.
- Look, Lockie.
About the boarding-school thing,
things have been a lot happier at home
since my brothers been
back living with us.
- That's good.
- I'm not so angry with my dad anymore.
Which means I feel I've
got to along with things
when he's trying to do
what's right for me.
I just want to go back to
us fighting all the time.
You've got no idea how
lucky you are, Lockie.
You haven't got the slightest idea.
- Mum!
- Where's Mum?
- Is she coming home?
But the show must go on.
My job was to help Monster
who'd done a great job
with the lighting design.
- And Mary brought
forth her first-born son
and wrapped him in swaddling clothes
and laid him in a manger because
there was no room for them
at the inn.
Meanwhile local shepherds
attended their flock
when an angel appeared,
telling them, "Dont be afraid.
I bring news of joy.
For today, there is born to you
and all people, a Saviour."
- Okay, Monster, cue
the Star Of Bethlehem.
- Here she comes, go baby, go.
Power cut, no, no, no!
I've overloaded the system!
- There cant be a power cut, look.
- Not possible, we don't have any power.
- It's a miracle!
- The Three Wise Men have
followed the Star Of Bethlehem
to the lowly music stable
where they are each to present
their gift of song to the baby Jesus.
- Bounce, bounce, bounce, yo!
I'm talking about the mayhem in Bethlehem.
- We got power back.
- Revs rock opera was going
off, but all of a sudden, I felt
like I was a million miles
away, watching the whole thing
through the wrong end of a telescope.
I just had this silly hope in my head
that I would turn around
and there would be Mum,
coming in through the door at
the back of the hall to join
us all.
But I guess we'd already
had our miracle for the
night.
- And now, ladies and
gentlemen, boys and girls,
join me, please, as we sing
that most beautiful of Christmas carols
- Do you need a hug?
Why don't you just ask me for one?
You know, Lockie, sometimes
it's better to say things with
your mouth than just think
them in your head all the time.
I've been watching you go
through all this stuff with your
mum.
I think you're doing an awesome job.
I think you're a total legend, Lockie.
- I need that hug, please.
If it's still okay.
Actually, Vicki, there is
something I want to say.
I don't want you going off to
any stupid boarding school.
I don't care what you have to do.
I want you to stay here.
- Well, you took your time saying that.
I suppose I could talk to Dad about it.
But why do you want me to stay?
- Because I love you.
- And that took even longer!
- Why should Christmas Day
be different to any other
morning?
So, I went surfing.
Mum, is that you?
Mum, are you actually real?
- Come on, slacker, hurry up!
- I don't believe it!
- Lockie, I'm for good.
- Sarge was right.
It was the best Christmas
ever!