Lockie Leonard (2007–2010): Season 1, Episode 16 - Brothers - full transcript

- Welcome to my life.

Status check, things were perfect.

I was officially the
coolest guy in school.

- Hey Lockie, how's it going.

- People looked up to me as
a wicked surfer and president

of the Board Riding Association.

And my girlfriend Vicky, saw
me as the perfect boyfriend.

Yup, I'd become Mr. Popular
and I was loving it.

The only person who didn't
seem to notice the new me,

is Phillip, he was way too busy
on a top secret assignment.

Project Lisa was in full swing.



He was planning to make his move at

the Blue Light Disco tomorrow night.

- Hey Lisa, over here!

- Hey Phillip, you here
to play basketball?

Just supporting the team.

- Alright girls come
on, two laps at the oval

before we start.

- Please, but your
favourite song just came on.

- Problem solved.

Come on girls, two laps
at the oval, let's go!

- You want me to watch your
stuff while you've gone?

- It was downright
scary the way Phillip

thought Lisa saw him.

Told you it was scary.



- Yeah that'd be great, Phillip, thanks.

- Like science says,
when opportunity knocks,

you answer the door.

While Phillip was trying
to start a relationship,

Mine was was waiting for me on the beach.

Vicky and me had become a perfect couple.

We'd reached a comfortable place together.

I could tell her everything.

Hey, I've been thinking.

How about we go for Chinese before

the disco tomorrow night.

- Dinner, like a real date-date?

- Yeah, it'd be cool.

- I'd love that, it'd be so romantic.

Dinner and dancing!

- Dancing?

- Duh, we're going to the disco.

- Yeah right, fun.

But I can't dance!

So maybe I couldn't tell her everything,

because I was Mr. Perfect,
and perfect guys can

dance at Blue Light Discos.

- We start with a set of classic songs

then on to modern songs.

Then we announce the best dancing couple.

For the finale we play one slow song.

- Who chooses the music?

- Yes Reverend?

- I'd love to be in charge of the music.

I'm very hip to the
beat if I say so myself.

I used to be quite the mus-o.

- You might be very busy,
perhaps there's someone else!

- Mrs. S, my dad is pretty
rocking in a musical sense.

More than most oldies.

- Jeffrey, what exactly
are you doing here?

- Is it a disco for kids?

And I'm giving a kid's
opinion, and I think my dad

can do it, no worries.

- Well it looks like we have our deejay.

- Yes!

- So what do the rest of us get to do?

- What you do best, patrol.

Keep things in order,
you are the blue light

in the Blue Light Disco after all.

- Well I'll be head shoe checker.

It's a vital job, don't you
dare wear thongs young man.

Lisa, arrest that boy!

- It was a good thing
that Phil wasn't there

to see Lisa laughing at Johnny's jokes.

But bad for me that he was at home.

Phillip!

- I know Lisa's favourite
song is here somewhere!

I've got the best invention
to give her at the disco.

- You could've asked.

- You always let me play your CDs.

Yes, found it!

- Things have changed.

- Talk about supreme-o grumpy.

- I'm not grumpy, I'm popular.

And from now on you treat
me stuff with respect.

Is that my basketball?

- Technically yes, I'm
fixing it to play music

so Lisa can think of
me when she's training.

- How am I supposed to
play basketball now?

- But you hate basketball!

- You don't get it, I've changed!

I love basketball now.

- You have changed, you
think you're better than

everyone but you've just got a big head.

Bigger than your stupid basketball.

- Phillip was right, my
head had grown as big as a

basketball, I just didn't
realise it at the time.

Why don't you see what everyone else sees?

That Lisa's only nice to you
because Sarge is her boss.

- That's not true, we bonded
over mutual interests,

science, and inventions,
and a love of barbecue.

- Right, like you know
anything about girls.

Just clean up my stuff!

It was our first proper fight.

Phillip decided it was
time he had a bedroom

of his own, which was okay by me.

- You sure you're okay with this love,

it's a big change?

- Fine Mum, me and Lockie
have come to an agreement.

I agree that he's an idiot, and he agrees

that I'm a moron.

- As well as upsetting
Mum, our fight gave Phillip

something else to worry about.

And the only person who
could help him out was Lisa.

- Hey Lisa.

- Hey, what are you up to?

- Just testing out my new bike brakes,

thought I'd pop in.

I've been trying to
remember what your favourite

subject was in school.

- Science, you know that.

- That's right, we
talked about it ages ago

at the barbecue.

Found out we had heaps
in common, didn't we?

- Sure did, and almost blew up the shed.

That was fun.

- Tops, so I see you're
going to the disco?

- Of course I am.

So you gonna save me a
dance, are you Phillip?

- You can call me Phil,
and I'll definitely save

you a dance, Lisa.

- So there I was, a room to myself.

And my new goal, to look halfway normal

on the dance floor.

Or at least a quarter way.

- What do you call that?

- Dancing?

- Maybe you should try a slower song.

You know, crawl before you can walk.

- What, can you dance?

- Never really tried.

- Too afraid to make a fool of yourself?

- No one's gonna be looking at me.

I'm practically invisible.

They'll all be watching Mr.
Popular, and checking out

your clothes and watching
every single move.

- Working hard on your
new invention, Phillip?

- Yup, it's a winner in progress, Sarge.

- Can't wait to see it.

So how's everybody enjoying the lasagna?

- Lasagna, I thought it was
spaghetti and meatballs?

- I followed the recipe exactly.

- I think what Lockie meant to say was

"it's sublime, thank you
for preparing it," right?

- Right, sorry.

- I like the lumps, Mum.

What's wrong Lockie, worried
you might have to dance

in public tomorrow?

That's right, you do.

Pity you can't dance.

- Everybody can dance.

Especially Leonards.

- Lockie might be challenged
in that area, Sarge.

Lockie, have you told Vicky
about your little problem yet?

- I could feel it happening
again, the mean streak.

And there was nothing
I could do to stop it.

That's it, you're never
touching my stuff again.

And stay out of my room, for good!

- Hey that's enough!

Don't make me repeat
the clothes line lesson!

- When Phillip was five,
he ate the head off

my Surfing Safari action figure.

And we fought for two days.

So Sarge found a solution.

- However, if you can
prove you can behave,

I might check in a rare
treat that I've been

saving for a special occasion.

- We'll work on it, Sarge.

Won't we Phillip?

- Sarge, can I have a lock on my door?

- Thought you'd given up the knitting,

made you too tense?

- What if they go on like
this fighting forever?

What if they never get the closeness back?

- It's just a phase,
hormones, high school,

friends, it's a lot to
deal with, remember?

The sweetness of change is in the air.

What now will come and replace it there?

Whether it be soft and hardly to see,

or measure it forth by a raging sea.

- Let's hope it doesn't
bring a raging sea with it.

- No need to bring out
the dotted PJ's just yet,

the boys will be fine.

- no one wanted Mum pulling
out her dotted PJ's,

that meant a whole day in
bed and lots more knitting.

So I came up with a plan
to make everyone happy.

A plan that included a
CD and two award winning

performances from Phillip and me.

Hi Phillip.

Gee, that looks interesting.

What are you working on?

- A surprise present, for someone special,

basket ball which plays music.

- Right, here I thought
you might want to borrow

the CD you were looking for yesterday.

- Thanks Lockie.

- Your welcome Phillip.

- Keep that up boys,
you'll look forward to

that rare treat later.

- Yes, we pulled it off,
looking like friends again.

- God wants you to party hard, dance!

Give pants up for aunts!

- Hi Rev, how's it going?

- Phillip, it's good to see you there!

- I need to ask you a really
huge favour about the disco.

- It sounds important.

- The sarge told me
you're in charge of music,

including the special
slow song at the end.

- That's right, big responsibility.

- If you played track
three for the slow song,

you'd make two people really happy.

- Well Lockie and Vicky, is it?

- I really can't say Rev.

But everybody loves track
three, it's a real winner!

I'll leave you to your plants now.

- Since you two have
been behaving yourselves,

it's time for that rare treat.

You're about to witness
a 10 year tradition.

My body is the instrument.

Music the ignition.

Behold, how to dance!

And in style.

Hit the track.

- This is the rare treat?

- To everyone else,
Sarge looked like a praying

mantis on hot coals.

But to Mum, he was the man.

And she was a goner.

- Are you going to dance
like that at the disco?

- Sarge's special treat
didn't help at all,

I was still stuck.

And I only had a few
minutes left to practise

before my big dinner date with Vicky.

So I decided to take advantage.

- Cricky, I've sen
three-legged cows with more

rhythm than that.

- Seryl was right, I was doomed.

- You're sure you're okay
with the Szechuan chicken?

It's pretty spicy.

- Yeah, I have pepper on my
dinner all the time at home.

It's great to hide the taste.

- Yeah but you know it's chilli right?

- I was trying my best to
enjoy my dinner with Vicky.

After all, it was so
different from the last time

we were here.

- Maybe you should get back
to me when you've grown

up a bit, in about 25 years.

- Things were different now.

She no longer thought I was a kid.

She liked me for who I was.

I could tell her the truth,
that I couldn't dance.

Vicky, there's something I
sort of have to tell you.

I don't want you to get upset.

Its about--

- What?

Didn't eat a whole chilli did you?

- Water, need water, thirsty!

- What did you wanna tell me?

- I can't, I can't...

- I know, I can't wait
either, let's go dancing!

- Are you okay?

- Great.

But I wasn't, the chilli
chicken had turned into chilli

frogs practising karaoke in my tummy.

I really needed to go to the toilet.

- And now for all you crazy
cats out there, put your paws

together for your deejay guest, Egg Kodar!

- Ed was right, nobody was watching him

and no one cared what he
looked like with one exception.

It was my chance to go to the toilet.

Might be a sec.

But all the cubicles were
full of people ignoring Egg.

All I could think of
was making best friends

with the toilet, but then...

- Lachlan Robert Louis Stevenson Leonard,

will you dance with me?

- How could I say no?

Of course.

The moment of truth, goodbye Mr. Popular,

goodbye perfect boyfriend,
hello sad loser.

I knew I was about to
become the biggest joke

in Angeles, so why postpone the torture.

- And right on cue, the
frogs decided to break dance

in my stomach.

- Remind you of anybody?

Splitting image.

- I didn't know it at the
time, I was just trying

to hold my stomach together
until the last possible second,

but I created Angeles history that night.

And it became known as
the rumbly bum rumber.

And suddenly the chilli
frogs made room for what

felt like a rhinoceros.

I was playing the rest of
the sound effects and smells.

Here, watch this again.

I just wanted to be
absolutely clear on how

big a rhinoceros was.

- Lockie!

- Not now Phillip.

- Lockie I know you don't
like me much at the moment,

but I really need you
to tell me when I should

give the ball to Lisa.

- I'm busy here,
figure it out yourself!

- This is important!

- Me and Vicky, we won!

- If I give it to her too soon--

- I told you I'm busy!

Okay, so I was acting
like a lunatic with a head

the size of a basketball,
but it's not like it

was the best timing in the world.

- Lockie wait, you've got something--

- What, what is it!?

- Um, nevermind.

- At the time I didn't
know why Phillip chose not

to tell me, but thinking about it later...

I would've done the
same thing if I was him.

- Everyone, the best dancing couple

- I couldn't believe it,
but like Vicky said once,

life is full of mysteries.

And just like that, my
tummy finally felt okay.

- And find your partners
people, because coming up

is the much anticipated
slow song of the evening.

- Wait here okay, I'll be right back.

- Don't forget
to head to Strict Mike's

for your next great deal!

- I used to dream about being like this?

- What?

- In love with a nice guy,
someone who cares about me.

Someone bright and gentle.

I need tonight to be perfect,

just like out of a romance novel.

- It all worked out and Vicky
still wanted to be with me.

- As Phillip's heart broke
into a million pieces,

I realised how much he really meant to me.

- That's my stuff.

- Yeah, guilty.

It's weird, but I actually missed your gum

slurping last night.

I thought you might wanna move back in.

- And what if I don't want to?

- Then I'd have to resort
to plan B which involves

begging and grovelling,
possibly even favours.

- Hot chocolate.

- Thanks.

- Now where would you like yours?

- Here is fine for now.

Let's talk about these favours.

- I really wanted to say
sorry for the way I acted,

for getting a big head, for
being selfish, for everything.

But all that came out was "sorry."

- As in how many favours and for how long?

- I could start by unpacking your stuff.

Phillip had let me off the
hook for the most part.

So I wasn't perfect, no one was.

Maybe all that mattered was
that the people you cared

about saw the real you.

And still loved you, even
when you acted like an idiot.

And right now I owed it
to Phillip to act like

the biggest idiot I could.