Living Single (1993–1998): Season 4, Episode 23 - Papa Was a Rolling Stone - full transcript
‐ Come on, come on. ‐ Okay.
Oh, not in your apartment.
Oh, we actually
got away with it.
Yeah, pretty amazing,
considering half the night
you were screaming
like a banshee.
Hah!
So? You were the one
cooing like a pigeon.
‐ Oh. ‐ Even after
you fell asleep.
Yeah, well, you know.
You are the only woman
who has ever elicited
coos from a Barker.
‐ Ooh. ‐ Rrr.
‐ Oh! ‐ Woo.
Oh, wait, wait, wait. Max, Max.
Max, Max, Max, Max.
It's okay. It's just Overton.
What do you mean,
it's just Overton?
Well, he knows.
He knows what?
I know you'll need
to oil that box spring.
Freaka‐fregade‐fregade
‐fradgady‐freak.
First, Khadijah. Now, Overton.
Wait, wait, wait.
Khadijah knows?
She knows if she
tells, I'll kill her.
And the same goes
for you, Mr. Handy Boy.
Oh, my lip's are sealed.
Unlike yours, Miss
Pigeon Noises.
‐ That was Kyle. ‐ Oh, yeah.
Yeah, right. Like that
was you doing that.
Ah, she's right man. You
know, she hit that spot‐‐.
Oh, no. No, you went Stop it.
What's so funny?
‐ Ah, nothing. ‐ Ah, nothing.
Overton Wakefield Jones.
Your eyelid twitches that way
when you're holding
something back or telling a lie.
What's going on?
Oh, woman, can't a
man moisten his cornea
without you getting suspicious?
I'm telling you,
n‐nothing's going on.
Alright, tell me you like
my cottage cheese
key lime cobbler.
It's a taste sensation.
♪ We are living ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Single ♪
♪ Ooh and in a
nineties kind of world ♪
♪ I'm glad I got my girls ♪
♪ Keep your head up ♪
♪ What? ♪
♪ Keep your head up ♪
♪ That's right ♪
♪ Whenever this life get tough ♪
♪ You gotta fight with ♪
♪ My homegirls standing
to my left and my right ♪
♪ True blue it's
tight like glue ♪
♪ We are living ♪
♪ Check check check it out ♪
♪ Check check check it out ♪
♪ Single ♪
♪ Do what you want,
girlfriend cause it's your world ♪
♪ Haa ♪
Okay, dad.
Well, I don't have mommy's
number in front of me right now.
So why don't you just
give me your number?
And the, I'll have her call you.
Alright, let me get a pen.
Yeah, go ahead.
Uh‐huh.
Okay, alright. Got it. Bye.
So is your dad
coming to the wedding?
Unfortunately,
he's in town early
and he wants to
take me and my mom
to brunch for Mother's Day.
I love brunch.
It's like breakfast and
lunch all rolled up into one.
Oh, oh, that's it.
Breakfast and lunch to..
I just got that, girl.
I don't know why you even
invited him in the first place.
The man just went
through his third divorce.
Think he'd be sick
of weddings by now.
Oh, now, let's put a Band‐Aid
on that emotional boo‐boo.
You know, your
father's kinda cool.
He taught us how
to play basketball
and he taught us that
really neat card game.
Ah, what was it, uh,
three‐card Monte?
Claire, the man spent
more time in Atlantic City
than he did with us.
Maybe he liked the ocean.
Maybe he liked any
place that wasn't home.
Alright, Khadijah.
I know that your father
was not the perfect father.
But‐but maybe my wedding
is the perfect opportunity
for you two to get
together and chit and chat.
‐ Chit and chat? ‐ 'Yeah.'
Well, what we going
to chit and chat about?
Why I only see him once a year?
Or how are your other kids?
Where is that dirt
bike you promised me
for my tenth birthday?
Huh, where is it?
Where is the bike?
‐ I never got the
bike. ‐ I know.
‐ The bike never
came. ‐ Ding‐ding‐ding.
‐ Ding‐ding‐ding. ‐ I
really wanted that bike.
Ding‐ding‐ding.
Alright, I tried. You win.
Happy cousin, zero.
Stank attitude cousin, one.
Here, have a refreshing
drink. I'm sorry.
Hey, sweetie, um..
The baker is having a problem
with your wedding cake.
Now, he say's that he can
make it in the shape of a daisy
but it's too heavy to
balance on a liquorice stem.
El chorro.
Hey, wait a minute.
Is this one your trick's to keep
my, my‐my reception
from being "an atrocity?"
You know, I get
the feeling you think
this event is all about
you and Overton.
Other people have
reputations at stake here.
Yeah, you're right,
Regine. We're bad people.
Just throw this out.
Did it ever occur to you
that Overton doesn't want
a wedding cake shaped
like a big old funky daisy?
Wait, now. Maybe that's what
he and Kyle are keeping from me.
Overton keeping
secret's from you?
Please girl, that's
like Snap and Crackle
keeping secrets from Pop.
‐ Yeah, it's no big
whoop. ‐ Yeah, you're right.
Okay, so this cake.
Now, we've got this‐‐
I bet it's some little
thing wrong with his car.
Something little like that.
Synclaire, why don't
you just ask him?
I don't want to ask him.
I don't want him to think
I don't trust him.
Especially this
close to the wedding.
I mean, I‐it's a bad sign.
You know what's a
bad sign at a wedding?
No cake!
What if it's something huge?
What if he needs
a heart transplant
or‐or liver transplant?
Or chin, a whole new chin?
What will he touch
when he is thinking?
Regine, you've got to help me.
Clearly somebody has to.
Alright, what do
you want me to do?
Well, girl..
You know how you're
this evil little busy body.
Well, why don't you just be
a dear and find out for me?
Alright, but only because
I need a semi‐sane bride.
Consider this a gift here.
So when your actual
wedding day comes
and you get something
modest, you understand.
I still can't believe it.
My mother eating with my father.
I mean, who ever
heard of such a thing?
Bolt the door.
The four horsemen of the
apocalypse are on their way.
Oh, come on, Khadijah.
It will be fun to
see Uncle Eddie.
Remember that neat
magic trick he used to do?
Oh, yeah, the one
where he disappears
whenever you need him.
Before I help you
get through this
why don't you think of
him as just another man?
You know, a puppy with pants.
Look, I'll be fine. I'm just
going to support my moms..
For her sake, I'mma play
this whole thing on the low.
Just watch me. You're
going to be proud.
Ma.
Mummy, mummy,
what were you thinking?
Hello to you, too.
‐ Aunt Rita,
Rita, Rita. ‐ Hello.
Okay, look, ju‐just‐just tell me
why would you have
brunch with daddy?
Well, your father finally
realized that I deserve
to celebrate at least
one Mother's Day.
And I'mma take him up on it.
I can't remember the last
time the man brought me
a stick of gum.
Oh, I get it.
We're going to go
out and juice him.
Break his pockets
a little some‐some.
Ma, your good. Go ahead,
ma. You witty, witty, ma.
Uncle Eddie. Uncle
Eddie, Eddie, Eddie, Eddie.
Your pops is fine.
How come I'm getting
older and you aren't?
You are so silly.
I got a little cheek
he can kiss, too.
'Oh, a big one.'
Look at my little Hoover
star. Still beautiful.
Hey, you still playing ball?
Oh, no, no. I have a job.
Bill's to pay.
Responsibility.
You know how it is.
Oh, no, you don't, do you?
Khadijah. Khadijah!
Well, that's,
that's alright, Rita.
She has got the gift of sarcasm.
It's a James thing.
Yes, sir. Yes, sir.
Oh, Maxine Shaw.
Attorney, alder‐woman.
I've heard everything.
Everything about you.
And if you take me to
dinner, I'll forget it all.
‐ She means it. ‐ 'Yeah.'
Ah, I'm sorry, I just want
this to be with the family.
Speaking of which.
Synclaire, where is
this young man of yours?
I have no idea where he is.
You know how men are.
Always off doing things
nobody knows about.
I don't know
where he is. I don't..
I can't believe I don't
know where he is..
‐ Okay, okay. ‐
Tell me anything.
Just going out having
secret's like he's‐‐.
So, uh, are my
two favorite ladies
ready for a night out on a town?
Well, I don't know about
your two favorite ladies
whoever they
maybe, but the mother
of your first born and the
daughter who you only see
when it's convenient
are ready to eat.
Like I'm Overton's
keeper. Please.
He is trying to
keep stuff from me.
We fitting of getting
married? Oh, ho, ho.
That won't happen, once
the ring is on the finger.
Oh, no. Don't you mess with me.
You tell me, when and
where for art thou, Overton.
Yes, don't mess with me.
Khadijah, you were so adorable.
Do you remember whenever
you would get an upset stomach?
No.
You would make me sing
the "Get Well Tummy" song
and rub your belly.
And you'd get mad at me
because I didn't sing it right.
That's right. That's right.
I don't remember any of this.
Oh, yeah.
Check this out.
Here I am singing to your belly
when you were five years old.
‐ That's my tootsie
roll bank. ‐ 'Yeah.'
I can't believe you carry
this around in your wallet.
‐ I look miserable. ‐
No. Your stomach hurt.
Or maybe it was your singing.
Ah, now, maybe I can
get the band to play
something to
lighten up the mood.
Golly, ma. You are
a heck of an actress.
You almost got me convinced
you're falling for this garbage.
I'm not falling for anything.
Your father and I get along fine
just as long as
we're not married.
But, ma, this was suppose
to be about payback.
And the look on his
face when we hit him
with that fat check and bounce.
Band didn't even know
"The Get Well Tummy Song."
But it turns out
they know our song.
‐ May I have this
dance with‐‐ ‐ No.
This is Mother's Day,
and I'm the mother.
Your parents?
They look just great together.
Your a very lucky young lady.
Now, if that were true
this wouldn't be
happening to me.
Including you talking to me.
Now here's the kicker.
You could retrieve any
phone number you want
just by speaking
into this bad boy.
But you got to program it first
so recognize your voice, see..
Attention, this is your mother.
Learn my voice or get
sent back to the store.
‐ That is all. ‐ Oh, how nice.
Two people who don't live here
and one of them is yelling.
Why don't we just kick a hole
in the sofa for the fun of it?
I'm down.
Um, Overton.
Pfft. I don't need to be
clever. This is just you.
Now, I understand that
you and Kyle are keeping
something from Synclaire.
What is it?
I just love that movie "Casino."
Especially that scene where
they stick that guys head
in the vice and tighten it
until his eyes... pop out.
Um, uh, Regine,
the‐the secret is, um..
Synclaire had her heart set
on honeymooning in Australia
and I'm more
afraid of koala bears
than I am of clowns.
Yeah. True that. True that.
I mean, people, people
think they are cute
but they are still bears.
Now you know my shame.
Hello.
Hello, mother.
Ooh, gossip.
What's up, girl?
Girl, I don't know
what happened.
I mean, at first, it
was us against him.
Then it was their song.
Then it was my migraine.
Next thing I know,
they were laughing
and dropping me off.
Good work, mom.
Sookey‐sookey, now.
According to my mother
your mother and your father
are on their way to
Atlantic City in a limo.
Atlantic City?
Aw, well, isn't that romantic?
In a cruel, heartless
sort of way.
Oh, my God.
This is my fault.
I just sat there and let
her get taken in by him.
Well, I'm not letting
her go out like that.
Hmm, no girl. Come on, let's go.
I just got to run upstairs
and get my camera.
Mom wants me to
take some pictures.
Sorry, Regine.
This is a family thing.
What?
Come on, Max. You driving.
'Max?'
Since when is she family?
Well, she ain't been
around with you.
‐ You want that. ‐
She ain't been around..
Khadijah. Khadijah.
Please, Khadijah.
We have searched every
stupid inch of every damn casino.
Now, if I don't start to
get some freaking food
I may just to get cranky.
Well, you better
wrestle Cleopatra
for a bowl of them pretzels
because I'm not stopping
until I find my parents.
No.
Look. Look at them.
The faces of those
people in the buffeteria.
They know something
about your mother and father.
I say we go question them.
Ooh, hoo, hoo. Ooh,
bad for you heart.
Bad for your heart.
Would you look at that?
Oh, I know.
An all you can eat
Belgium waffle bar.
No.
Well, how could
you do this to me?
Didn't we drop you off
three hours from here?
Khadijah, how's your headache?
It's getting worse.
You know, those waffles
are all you can eat.
Khadijah, you're being
rude and ridiculous.
Ma, can't you see he's
just trying to play you?
Except this time with less hair?
What are you talking about?
He brought you to Atlantic City!
Some high rolling, a few drinks
you wake up in his
complimentary hotel room.
First of all, there
is no hotel room.
Second, your father stopped
gambling seven years ago.
And the only reason we're here
is to see the Smokey
Robinson Show.
Oh!
Oh‐oh. You know this
is not the real crab meat.
This is a fake crab meat.
Not that I care.
Thank you!
After all that's happened,
how can you hang out with him?
Look, baby, nobody
has been as angry
with your father as I have.
But I can either carry
that bitterness to my grave
or sit in the front row with
my ex and wink at Smokey.
I hear you on that,
ma. That's‐that's great.
But it is gonna take Smokey
and a whole lot more
miracles for me to move on.
Now, hold up there,
Khadijah! Hold up there!
Give me five minutes to load up.
They just took the
skin off the gravy.
Just five minutes!
Just taking few things.
Few things for the road.
For the road!
Time for my midnight snack.
Girl, I'm getting into
that wedding dress
if I got to drink diet
shakes all night long.
Well, I didn't get
any decent dirt
but I saved your marriage
and I guess that's something.
Really? You‐you know what
Overton's keeping from me?
Hmm.
Okay, well, tell me! No, don't.
Well, come on. Tell me!
No, don't, don't, don't.
Okay, I know.
I'll go into the living room
you pretend like you're
telling someone else.
And I'll just
overhear. Okay. Go!
Okay, before you drive
us both completely insane.
Overton doesn't want
a vacation in Australia
because he's
afraid of koala bears.
That's absurd!
When Overton was three
he fell into the koala habitat
at the Cleveland Zoo.
The mama koala scooped
him up to safety and he was fine.
Girl, the whole thing was
on "Those Amazing Animals."
I've been duped by
Overton Wakefield Jones?
Apparently!
Hey, ladies. Uh..
Got any more of
those diet shakes?
Found out that's a great way
to wash down cheese cake.
You liar!
Well, don't knock till you try.
Overton, there's something
I'd like to discuss with you.
Something of a personal
and private nature.
Ah, well, you be that
way, then, you hear.
I'll just go over to Kyle's
and see if homeboy able
to drive me to Atlantic City.
It is time to stop the insanity.
You and Kyle are
keeping something from me
and I want you to
tell me what it is.
I, I can't do that, baby.
What? I'm about to be your wife!
Look, Kyle is my best friend
and I promised not to
divulge the information.
Alright.
What about I promised
to the same secrecy
plus I give you a yummy
marshmallow massage?
Kyle and Max are doing
the wild thing again. Let's go.
Wait, wait, wait.
That's your secret?
Oh, I knew that!
The‐the, his room
is right above mine.
I hear, heard them
through the vent one night.
Oh, please.
Guess what?
Max coos like a pigeon.
Child, that's Kyle.
‐ No! ‐ Yeah.
Coo, coo!
Did I ever tell you
how my father used
to take us fly fishing?
In Montana. Every summer.
Every sum.. Every summer!
Every damn summer!
Large mouth bass.
Woo‐hoo.
Well, at least your
father was there.
I had a drive‐by daddy.
Every now and then, he'd roll up
throw a few empty
promises my way
and keep on moving.
Oh, I get it.
Mm‐hmm. Forget him.
Oh, look who's
driving up on you now.
Alright. I guess I'll go watch
Moses free his
people from Egypt.
They got a show in 15 minutes.
Who is your messiah now?
It's better if you
use the lever.
A‐and when you pull it
yank it like you mean it.
I can handle it! Thank you!
You never did listen to me.
Well, I've kind of a
short attention span.
Especially since I
only hear from you
every six months.
You know, the only reason you're
here is for Synclaire's wedding!
No, I'm here because I
wanted to be with my family.
Khadijah, when your
mother and I had you
we were younger
than you are now!
I wasn't ready to be a father
and I made a lot of mistakes!
A whole lot of mistakes, daddy.
Mad goo gobs of mistakes.
Why you wait
until now to say it?
Another mistake.
But I'm still your father.
Maybe you feel like
you don't need me
but I need you.
Why?
'Cause you are one of
the few things in my life
I didn't mess up!
Khadijah, you became
a strong, intelligent..
Beautiful young woman.
I just wish I could say I
had more to do with it.
So do I.
I'm sorry, I..
I don't know how
I can pay you back
for all the times
I wasn't there.
Give me a dollar.
Okay.
Come on!
A‐almost. Just pull down faster.
Let it go and snap!
Uh.. Uh..
‐ Damn! ‐ Damn!
Come on, give me
more! Give me more!
Khadijah, I'm not trying
to buy your affections.
For three dollars?
Look, I‐I I'm gonna
go find your mother
and tell her where we are.
I'll be back, I promise.
Alright.
Hey!
Come on. Come..
Oh!
Big money! Daddy!
Dad! Oh, my God! Ha, ha!
'Whoo!'
I won!
Me, with my father's money!
I did it!
Oh, not in your apartment.
Oh, we actually
got away with it.
Yeah, pretty amazing,
considering half the night
you were screaming
like a banshee.
Hah!
So? You were the one
cooing like a pigeon.
‐ Oh. ‐ Even after
you fell asleep.
Yeah, well, you know.
You are the only woman
who has ever elicited
coos from a Barker.
‐ Ooh. ‐ Rrr.
‐ Oh! ‐ Woo.
Oh, wait, wait, wait. Max, Max.
Max, Max, Max, Max.
It's okay. It's just Overton.
What do you mean,
it's just Overton?
Well, he knows.
He knows what?
I know you'll need
to oil that box spring.
Freaka‐fregade‐fregade
‐fradgady‐freak.
First, Khadijah. Now, Overton.
Wait, wait, wait.
Khadijah knows?
She knows if she
tells, I'll kill her.
And the same goes
for you, Mr. Handy Boy.
Oh, my lip's are sealed.
Unlike yours, Miss
Pigeon Noises.
‐ That was Kyle. ‐ Oh, yeah.
Yeah, right. Like that
was you doing that.
Ah, she's right man. You
know, she hit that spot‐‐.
Oh, no. No, you went Stop it.
What's so funny?
‐ Ah, nothing. ‐ Ah, nothing.
Overton Wakefield Jones.
Your eyelid twitches that way
when you're holding
something back or telling a lie.
What's going on?
Oh, woman, can't a
man moisten his cornea
without you getting suspicious?
I'm telling you,
n‐nothing's going on.
Alright, tell me you like
my cottage cheese
key lime cobbler.
It's a taste sensation.
♪ We are living ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Single ♪
♪ Ooh and in a
nineties kind of world ♪
♪ I'm glad I got my girls ♪
♪ Keep your head up ♪
♪ What? ♪
♪ Keep your head up ♪
♪ That's right ♪
♪ Whenever this life get tough ♪
♪ You gotta fight with ♪
♪ My homegirls standing
to my left and my right ♪
♪ True blue it's
tight like glue ♪
♪ We are living ♪
♪ Check check check it out ♪
♪ Check check check it out ♪
♪ Single ♪
♪ Do what you want,
girlfriend cause it's your world ♪
♪ Haa ♪
Okay, dad.
Well, I don't have mommy's
number in front of me right now.
So why don't you just
give me your number?
And the, I'll have her call you.
Alright, let me get a pen.
Yeah, go ahead.
Uh‐huh.
Okay, alright. Got it. Bye.
So is your dad
coming to the wedding?
Unfortunately,
he's in town early
and he wants to
take me and my mom
to brunch for Mother's Day.
I love brunch.
It's like breakfast and
lunch all rolled up into one.
Oh, oh, that's it.
Breakfast and lunch to..
I just got that, girl.
I don't know why you even
invited him in the first place.
The man just went
through his third divorce.
Think he'd be sick
of weddings by now.
Oh, now, let's put a Band‐Aid
on that emotional boo‐boo.
You know, your
father's kinda cool.
He taught us how
to play basketball
and he taught us that
really neat card game.
Ah, what was it, uh,
three‐card Monte?
Claire, the man spent
more time in Atlantic City
than he did with us.
Maybe he liked the ocean.
Maybe he liked any
place that wasn't home.
Alright, Khadijah.
I know that your father
was not the perfect father.
But‐but maybe my wedding
is the perfect opportunity
for you two to get
together and chit and chat.
‐ Chit and chat? ‐ 'Yeah.'
Well, what we going
to chit and chat about?
Why I only see him once a year?
Or how are your other kids?
Where is that dirt
bike you promised me
for my tenth birthday?
Huh, where is it?
Where is the bike?
‐ I never got the
bike. ‐ I know.
‐ The bike never
came. ‐ Ding‐ding‐ding.
‐ Ding‐ding‐ding. ‐ I
really wanted that bike.
Ding‐ding‐ding.
Alright, I tried. You win.
Happy cousin, zero.
Stank attitude cousin, one.
Here, have a refreshing
drink. I'm sorry.
Hey, sweetie, um..
The baker is having a problem
with your wedding cake.
Now, he say's that he can
make it in the shape of a daisy
but it's too heavy to
balance on a liquorice stem.
El chorro.
Hey, wait a minute.
Is this one your trick's to keep
my, my‐my reception
from being "an atrocity?"
You know, I get
the feeling you think
this event is all about
you and Overton.
Other people have
reputations at stake here.
Yeah, you're right,
Regine. We're bad people.
Just throw this out.
Did it ever occur to you
that Overton doesn't want
a wedding cake shaped
like a big old funky daisy?
Wait, now. Maybe that's what
he and Kyle are keeping from me.
Overton keeping
secret's from you?
Please girl, that's
like Snap and Crackle
keeping secrets from Pop.
‐ Yeah, it's no big
whoop. ‐ Yeah, you're right.
Okay, so this cake.
Now, we've got this‐‐
I bet it's some little
thing wrong with his car.
Something little like that.
Synclaire, why don't
you just ask him?
I don't want to ask him.
I don't want him to think
I don't trust him.
Especially this
close to the wedding.
I mean, I‐it's a bad sign.
You know what's a
bad sign at a wedding?
No cake!
What if it's something huge?
What if he needs
a heart transplant
or‐or liver transplant?
Or chin, a whole new chin?
What will he touch
when he is thinking?
Regine, you've got to help me.
Clearly somebody has to.
Alright, what do
you want me to do?
Well, girl..
You know how you're
this evil little busy body.
Well, why don't you just be
a dear and find out for me?
Alright, but only because
I need a semi‐sane bride.
Consider this a gift here.
So when your actual
wedding day comes
and you get something
modest, you understand.
I still can't believe it.
My mother eating with my father.
I mean, who ever
heard of such a thing?
Bolt the door.
The four horsemen of the
apocalypse are on their way.
Oh, come on, Khadijah.
It will be fun to
see Uncle Eddie.
Remember that neat
magic trick he used to do?
Oh, yeah, the one
where he disappears
whenever you need him.
Before I help you
get through this
why don't you think of
him as just another man?
You know, a puppy with pants.
Look, I'll be fine. I'm just
going to support my moms..
For her sake, I'mma play
this whole thing on the low.
Just watch me. You're
going to be proud.
Ma.
Mummy, mummy,
what were you thinking?
Hello to you, too.
‐ Aunt Rita,
Rita, Rita. ‐ Hello.
Okay, look, ju‐just‐just tell me
why would you have
brunch with daddy?
Well, your father finally
realized that I deserve
to celebrate at least
one Mother's Day.
And I'mma take him up on it.
I can't remember the last
time the man brought me
a stick of gum.
Oh, I get it.
We're going to go
out and juice him.
Break his pockets
a little some‐some.
Ma, your good. Go ahead,
ma. You witty, witty, ma.
Uncle Eddie. Uncle
Eddie, Eddie, Eddie, Eddie.
Your pops is fine.
How come I'm getting
older and you aren't?
You are so silly.
I got a little cheek
he can kiss, too.
'Oh, a big one.'
Look at my little Hoover
star. Still beautiful.
Hey, you still playing ball?
Oh, no, no. I have a job.
Bill's to pay.
Responsibility.
You know how it is.
Oh, no, you don't, do you?
Khadijah. Khadijah!
Well, that's,
that's alright, Rita.
She has got the gift of sarcasm.
It's a James thing.
Yes, sir. Yes, sir.
Oh, Maxine Shaw.
Attorney, alder‐woman.
I've heard everything.
Everything about you.
And if you take me to
dinner, I'll forget it all.
‐ She means it. ‐ 'Yeah.'
Ah, I'm sorry, I just want
this to be with the family.
Speaking of which.
Synclaire, where is
this young man of yours?
I have no idea where he is.
You know how men are.
Always off doing things
nobody knows about.
I don't know
where he is. I don't..
I can't believe I don't
know where he is..
‐ Okay, okay. ‐
Tell me anything.
Just going out having
secret's like he's‐‐.
So, uh, are my
two favorite ladies
ready for a night out on a town?
Well, I don't know about
your two favorite ladies
whoever they
maybe, but the mother
of your first born and the
daughter who you only see
when it's convenient
are ready to eat.
Like I'm Overton's
keeper. Please.
He is trying to
keep stuff from me.
We fitting of getting
married? Oh, ho, ho.
That won't happen, once
the ring is on the finger.
Oh, no. Don't you mess with me.
You tell me, when and
where for art thou, Overton.
Yes, don't mess with me.
Khadijah, you were so adorable.
Do you remember whenever
you would get an upset stomach?
No.
You would make me sing
the "Get Well Tummy" song
and rub your belly.
And you'd get mad at me
because I didn't sing it right.
That's right. That's right.
I don't remember any of this.
Oh, yeah.
Check this out.
Here I am singing to your belly
when you were five years old.
‐ That's my tootsie
roll bank. ‐ 'Yeah.'
I can't believe you carry
this around in your wallet.
‐ I look miserable. ‐
No. Your stomach hurt.
Or maybe it was your singing.
Ah, now, maybe I can
get the band to play
something to
lighten up the mood.
Golly, ma. You are
a heck of an actress.
You almost got me convinced
you're falling for this garbage.
I'm not falling for anything.
Your father and I get along fine
just as long as
we're not married.
But, ma, this was suppose
to be about payback.
And the look on his
face when we hit him
with that fat check and bounce.
Band didn't even know
"The Get Well Tummy Song."
But it turns out
they know our song.
‐ May I have this
dance with‐‐ ‐ No.
This is Mother's Day,
and I'm the mother.
Your parents?
They look just great together.
Your a very lucky young lady.
Now, if that were true
this wouldn't be
happening to me.
Including you talking to me.
Now here's the kicker.
You could retrieve any
phone number you want
just by speaking
into this bad boy.
But you got to program it first
so recognize your voice, see..
Attention, this is your mother.
Learn my voice or get
sent back to the store.
‐ That is all. ‐ Oh, how nice.
Two people who don't live here
and one of them is yelling.
Why don't we just kick a hole
in the sofa for the fun of it?
I'm down.
Um, Overton.
Pfft. I don't need to be
clever. This is just you.
Now, I understand that
you and Kyle are keeping
something from Synclaire.
What is it?
I just love that movie "Casino."
Especially that scene where
they stick that guys head
in the vice and tighten it
until his eyes... pop out.
Um, uh, Regine,
the‐the secret is, um..
Synclaire had her heart set
on honeymooning in Australia
and I'm more
afraid of koala bears
than I am of clowns.
Yeah. True that. True that.
I mean, people, people
think they are cute
but they are still bears.
Now you know my shame.
Hello.
Hello, mother.
Ooh, gossip.
What's up, girl?
Girl, I don't know
what happened.
I mean, at first, it
was us against him.
Then it was their song.
Then it was my migraine.
Next thing I know,
they were laughing
and dropping me off.
Good work, mom.
Sookey‐sookey, now.
According to my mother
your mother and your father
are on their way to
Atlantic City in a limo.
Atlantic City?
Aw, well, isn't that romantic?
In a cruel, heartless
sort of way.
Oh, my God.
This is my fault.
I just sat there and let
her get taken in by him.
Well, I'm not letting
her go out like that.
Hmm, no girl. Come on, let's go.
I just got to run upstairs
and get my camera.
Mom wants me to
take some pictures.
Sorry, Regine.
This is a family thing.
What?
Come on, Max. You driving.
'Max?'
Since when is she family?
Well, she ain't been
around with you.
‐ You want that. ‐
She ain't been around..
Khadijah. Khadijah.
Please, Khadijah.
We have searched every
stupid inch of every damn casino.
Now, if I don't start to
get some freaking food
I may just to get cranky.
Well, you better
wrestle Cleopatra
for a bowl of them pretzels
because I'm not stopping
until I find my parents.
No.
Look. Look at them.
The faces of those
people in the buffeteria.
They know something
about your mother and father.
I say we go question them.
Ooh, hoo, hoo. Ooh,
bad for you heart.
Bad for your heart.
Would you look at that?
Oh, I know.
An all you can eat
Belgium waffle bar.
No.
Well, how could
you do this to me?
Didn't we drop you off
three hours from here?
Khadijah, how's your headache?
It's getting worse.
You know, those waffles
are all you can eat.
Khadijah, you're being
rude and ridiculous.
Ma, can't you see he's
just trying to play you?
Except this time with less hair?
What are you talking about?
He brought you to Atlantic City!
Some high rolling, a few drinks
you wake up in his
complimentary hotel room.
First of all, there
is no hotel room.
Second, your father stopped
gambling seven years ago.
And the only reason we're here
is to see the Smokey
Robinson Show.
Oh!
Oh‐oh. You know this
is not the real crab meat.
This is a fake crab meat.
Not that I care.
Thank you!
After all that's happened,
how can you hang out with him?
Look, baby, nobody
has been as angry
with your father as I have.
But I can either carry
that bitterness to my grave
or sit in the front row with
my ex and wink at Smokey.
I hear you on that,
ma. That's‐that's great.
But it is gonna take Smokey
and a whole lot more
miracles for me to move on.
Now, hold up there,
Khadijah! Hold up there!
Give me five minutes to load up.
They just took the
skin off the gravy.
Just five minutes!
Just taking few things.
Few things for the road.
For the road!
Time for my midnight snack.
Girl, I'm getting into
that wedding dress
if I got to drink diet
shakes all night long.
Well, I didn't get
any decent dirt
but I saved your marriage
and I guess that's something.
Really? You‐you know what
Overton's keeping from me?
Hmm.
Okay, well, tell me! No, don't.
Well, come on. Tell me!
No, don't, don't, don't.
Okay, I know.
I'll go into the living room
you pretend like you're
telling someone else.
And I'll just
overhear. Okay. Go!
Okay, before you drive
us both completely insane.
Overton doesn't want
a vacation in Australia
because he's
afraid of koala bears.
That's absurd!
When Overton was three
he fell into the koala habitat
at the Cleveland Zoo.
The mama koala scooped
him up to safety and he was fine.
Girl, the whole thing was
on "Those Amazing Animals."
I've been duped by
Overton Wakefield Jones?
Apparently!
Hey, ladies. Uh..
Got any more of
those diet shakes?
Found out that's a great way
to wash down cheese cake.
You liar!
Well, don't knock till you try.
Overton, there's something
I'd like to discuss with you.
Something of a personal
and private nature.
Ah, well, you be that
way, then, you hear.
I'll just go over to Kyle's
and see if homeboy able
to drive me to Atlantic City.
It is time to stop the insanity.
You and Kyle are
keeping something from me
and I want you to
tell me what it is.
I, I can't do that, baby.
What? I'm about to be your wife!
Look, Kyle is my best friend
and I promised not to
divulge the information.
Alright.
What about I promised
to the same secrecy
plus I give you a yummy
marshmallow massage?
Kyle and Max are doing
the wild thing again. Let's go.
Wait, wait, wait.
That's your secret?
Oh, I knew that!
The‐the, his room
is right above mine.
I hear, heard them
through the vent one night.
Oh, please.
Guess what?
Max coos like a pigeon.
Child, that's Kyle.
‐ No! ‐ Yeah.
Coo, coo!
Did I ever tell you
how my father used
to take us fly fishing?
In Montana. Every summer.
Every sum.. Every summer!
Every damn summer!
Large mouth bass.
Woo‐hoo.
Well, at least your
father was there.
I had a drive‐by daddy.
Every now and then, he'd roll up
throw a few empty
promises my way
and keep on moving.
Oh, I get it.
Mm‐hmm. Forget him.
Oh, look who's
driving up on you now.
Alright. I guess I'll go watch
Moses free his
people from Egypt.
They got a show in 15 minutes.
Who is your messiah now?
It's better if you
use the lever.
A‐and when you pull it
yank it like you mean it.
I can handle it! Thank you!
You never did listen to me.
Well, I've kind of a
short attention span.
Especially since I
only hear from you
every six months.
You know, the only reason you're
here is for Synclaire's wedding!
No, I'm here because I
wanted to be with my family.
Khadijah, when your
mother and I had you
we were younger
than you are now!
I wasn't ready to be a father
and I made a lot of mistakes!
A whole lot of mistakes, daddy.
Mad goo gobs of mistakes.
Why you wait
until now to say it?
Another mistake.
But I'm still your father.
Maybe you feel like
you don't need me
but I need you.
Why?
'Cause you are one of
the few things in my life
I didn't mess up!
Khadijah, you became
a strong, intelligent..
Beautiful young woman.
I just wish I could say I
had more to do with it.
So do I.
I'm sorry, I..
I don't know how
I can pay you back
for all the times
I wasn't there.
Give me a dollar.
Okay.
Come on!
A‐almost. Just pull down faster.
Let it go and snap!
Uh.. Uh..
‐ Damn! ‐ Damn!
Come on, give me
more! Give me more!
Khadijah, I'm not trying
to buy your affections.
For three dollars?
Look, I‐I I'm gonna
go find your mother
and tell her where we are.
I'll be back, I promise.
Alright.
Hey!
Come on. Come..
Oh!
Big money! Daddy!
Dad! Oh, my God! Ha, ha!
'Whoo!'
I won!
Me, with my father's money!
I did it!