Living Single (1993–1998): Season 2, Episode 6 - School Daze - full transcript

Oh, good.

Yes! Aah‐h!

Gah! Come on, Khadijah,
it's a beautiful day.

Put that stuff aside,
let's go for a run!

Please, look at
these bills. I can't.

Thank God! I hate runnin'.

Whoo! Let's eat.

Hey, Kha..

These are yours.
They were in my box.

Yes, right next to your
Coco's singles newsletter.

Damn, another 30‐day notice!



Just look on the bright side.

Means you have another
29 days of free electricity.

I thought you always
paid your bills on time.

I do when I have the money.

But things have
been so tight lately

I'm thinkin' about
auctionin' off a kidney.

Trust me, there's
no money in organs.

You know, Kyle, you
work with money everyday

maybe you can help
straighten out my finances.

No. No. Nope, sorry, I
do not work for friends.

Well, don't think
of me as a friend.

Think of me as someone who
fed you dinner every other day

for the past three years.

Okay, fine, I'll help.



But be warned. I'm tough.

I'm gonna force you to
live on a strict budget.

And you can start by cuttin' out
unnecessary household expenses.

Ergo... stop feeding that.

♪ We are living single ♪

♪ Ooh in the 90's
kind of world ♪

♪ I'm glad I got my girls ♪

♪ Oh keep your head up ♪
♪ What? ♪

♪ Keep your head up ♪
♪ That's right ♪

♪ Whenever this life get
tough you gotta fight ♪

♪ With my homegirls
standing to my left ♪

♪ And my right ♪
♪ True blue ♪

♪ We're tight like glue ♪

♪ We are living ♪
♪ Check check check it out ♪

♪ Check check check it out ♪
♪ Single ♪

Here's those arms
I've been missin'.

And there's those lips
that need some kissin'.

Oh, yeah, kissin'.

Another long day
at the library, huh?

Yes, after I did my
class assignment

I read the whole
art history textbook.

You know, I love night school.

Whenever I'm in the
class, I can be myself.

Only smarter.

Hey, I'm real happy
for you, baby, but..

Startin' to miss you.

Today I was up in 3‐C
unclogging the drain..

And once I got the
grease trap open

I spent the whole afternoon
just writin' your name

out on the sludge.

So romantic!

Whoo. Looky here,
looky here, looky here!

Wow, Regine, is
all that stuff yours?

Well, I'm workin' on
makin' all things mine

but for now, this'll have to do.

Synclaire, I thought
you were at the library.

They kicked me out for
staying past closing time.

The librarian told
me to get a life.

Now, how sad is that!

Ha ha ha.

You know, you have your
wigs to cover your head

and I have night school
to fill mine, alright?

Yeah, that's what you get

for tanglin' with
the intellectual.

Oh, yeah, right.

The woman's got "Beauty
and the Beast" sheets.

Looks like someone who's
supposed to be on a budget..

Went shoppin'.

Only got the things I needed.

Mmm‐hmm.

‐ What's this? ‐ I
gotta shave my legs.

Wear pants.

Double print photos?

That was only extra two dollars.

Which in the bank at
2.5% interest will put $17.50

in to your pocket by
the time you are 70.

And what is th..

Okay, well, I guess
those are a necessity

but, you know, in the future,
Khadijah, don't be afraid to buy

your feminine hygiene
products in bulk, you know.

Well, what do you
say we go to a movie?

Maybe one of those
sensitive female films

where Debra Winger
dies at the end.

I'm sorry but I'm not done
studyin' for the surprise quiz

we get every Monday.

Um, okay.

But you can pick
me up after class.

Good, then I'll look
forward to Monday.

Now, only rainy
days will get me down.

Thank you, for your quiz
papers, ladies and gentlemen.

And remember, another
surprise quiz next Monday.

That was his idea of a quiz?

The final's gonna be murder.

Oh, please, Synclaire,
you know you aced it.

You're the best
student in the class.

Hey, Synclaire,
you ready to roll?

We got reservations at
Mr. Foo's romantic river chante.

Boyfriend! Aren't you
going to introduce us?

Overton, these are my
friends, Nazila and Aaron.

‐ Hello. ‐ How you doin'?

So, Overton, are
you an art buff, too?

Oh, no, he is not
interested in this stuff.

‐ 'Oh.' ‐ Not true.

I appreciate paintin' as
much as the next man.

In fact, the Dutch Boy
all‐weather semi gloss

is my personal favorite.

Oh, you..

I read somewhere
that Franz Kline

actually used house
paint in some of his work.

'Cause he liked the texture.

Well, if he was really
interested in texture

I believe stucco would've
been the way to go.

Overton, you're such a hoot!

‐ You've gotta join this
class. ‐ Oh, yeah, yeah!

What'd you think, Synclaire?

I mean, what better way
to spend time with my baby

than to join the class?

Yeah, what better way?

Congratulations, Khadijah!

By using coupons and buyin'
generic brands, you saved

forty‐five percent of
your last grocery bill.

And also saved money
on grapes, by eatin' them

before I got to the register.

He doesn't even know how
much I saved her on the trail mix.

That's not saving,
that's stealing.

Well, you could save
a lot of money in jail.

Hey, Khadijah, guess what I‐I..

Generic food?

Oh, no!

Nothin' for me. Uh‐uh.

I know what you're sayin'.

This stuff is so bad, I was
almost tempted not to eat it.

Khadijah, now I know that
you're tryin' to save money..

But I have got an
incredible deal for you.

Two fifth row tickets to
see your favorite performer.

The Artist Formally
Known As Prince?

And they're yours for what I
paid for them, 30 bucks a piece!

I can't. It's not in my budget.

I'm proud of you, Khadijah.

Now, you keep this up,
and next time you can buy

the supermarket brand.

Sad thing is I'm
lookin' forward to that.

I'll give you $25
a piece for 'em.

What?

I cannot believe
that you are tryin'

to buy these tickets
in front of Khadijah!

And shunt me in the process!

‐ Kyle! ‐ Hey, hey, hey.

These tickets are in my budget.

I will not be taking
a limo to the concert

because... it's
not in my budget.

I will not be buying new
clothes for the concert

because... it's
not in my budget.

But I suppose you'd be taking

taking some bimbo
to an expensive dinner.

That is an investment.

Don't I have some
luxuries in my budget?

Yeah, but you blew that
on the gumball machine

at the supermarket.

Oh!

Have to admit, Synclaire,
I am pretty nervous

about bein' back in school.

Almost faked a fever.

Then I thought,
hell, who am I foolin'?

You'll be fine.

That's Professor
Fletcher. Come on.

Now, hold up,
slick, I'm with her.

Good evening, art
lovers and those of you

who need the extra credit.

Oh, I see we have a new
student in class tonight.

Tell us a bit about yourself.

Well... name is Overton
Wakefield Jones.

Originally from Cleveland.

I'm an Aquarius.
Synclaire's my girlfriend.

Obie, he doesn't
need to know that.

No, some of the fellas might
want to keep that in mind.

Oh, and I, I believe
the art feeds the soul.

Yeah, I used to
believe that, too.

Last week I told you
to bring in reproductions

of your favorite paintings
for interpretation.

Uh, why don't we start
the class off on a high note.

Synclaire.

This is "The Scream",
by Edward Munch

a German expressionist
who really captured the despair

and isolation of his generation.

I really relate to this piece.

Normally, I'm a chipper gal.

But sometimes, I feel that
everything out in the world

is a hostile force to get me.

They had to get
past me first, baby.

Yes, ah, anyway

the composition, the
rhythm of this piece

really speak to me.

Very good, Synclaire!

Reminds me of "Home Alone".

Since you've brought yourself
to our attention, Overton

why don't you go next?

Well... I just went
with my heart.

"Dogs Playing Poker".

See, if dogs could play poker

this is exactly what
they'd look like.

And I really loved the
way the artist captured

the tight‐lipped
expression of the bulldog

who's obviously bluffin'.

Obie, Obie, that's not real art.

But it is based on a fine work.

‐ "The Card Players".
‐ By Paul Cezanne.

‐ I looked it up. ‐
Oh, nice job, Overton!

'Now, who'd like to go next?'

‐ Aaron. ‐ Uh..

I brought in Leonardo
da Vinci's "Mona Lisa".

Which is, in my opinion,
the greatest painting

in all the world.

A masterpiece of portraiture.

That's also the most
reproduced work in history.

I know. I forgot
about the assignment.

Went to a card shop
down on the corner.

They had a million of these!

Also, I got the
"Mona Lisa" t‐shirt..

Uh, the travel umbrella,
and a shower curtain.

The man says when you
walk around in the bathroom

the eyes follow you.

Can anyone save
the drowning Aaron?

Well, I believe that the
"Mona Lisa" is a great work

because of da Vinci's dramatic
use of light and shadow.

Overton, you obviously
have some opinion on this.

Well, personally, I
don't get the hype.

I mean is it me, or
is this smile crooked?

And the background, I'm guessin'

these are supposed
to be mountains

but you can't really tell.

It just doesn't
look finished to me.

Overton is absolutely right.

In fact, da Vinci never
finished the "Mona Lisa".

Wasn't even his
favorite painting.

Well, what do you know?

Take note, people,
Overton is not afraid

to challenge
conventional wisdom.

I say, bravo!

And I encourage all of
you to twist your minds

the way Overton has twisted his.

I'm mad as H!

Ooh, she said the H letter!

Did I hear Synclaire
almost cuss?

Overton worked my
last nerve in class today.

He had to sit next to me.

Had to let everyone
know I was his girlfriend.

And if that's not bad enough,
he had to be the teacher's pet.

Suck up!

Hey, I have never seen
you this mad at him.

Truth is, I'm mad at myself

I let him join that class,
knowing it wasn't a good idea.

I know exactly what
you're goin' through.

In college, my boyfriend
and I were in the same class.

And it was a real drag.

What did you do?

He gave me a failing grade on
my midterm, so I dumped him.

Synclaire, you need to
be straight up with Overton

ask him to leave the class.

I don't wanna be petty. I
just want him to go away.

Synclaire, honey,
you've got to handle

the fragile male
ego with kid gloves.

Sweetie, I say throw a
brick through his window.

Oh, no no!

I'm probably making
too much of this.

The smart thing
to do is just for me

to ignore all of my
deepest feelings.

Okay.

But, um, you let me
know when you're ready

to do that brick thing.

Hey, Synclaire, study time.

Now, I took the liberty
of highlighting your book.

And dog‐earing all
the appropriate pictures.

Give me my book,
you freakin' barnacle!

Did I say that out loud?

Um, something wrong, Synclaire?

Is it too late to say no?

Hell, yeah!

Ooh, watch yourself. He
went for the whole H word.

Would you two get out of
here? Overton and I need to talk.

Sure, get a back bone now.

Wait a minute, wait
a minute, watch this.

I didn't mean to snap like that.

To be honest with you

I was really enjoyin' that
class until you enrolled.

Then why'd you
tell me I could join?

I was just being polite.

Well, maybe if you had to
have been ruder to me then

you'd be nicer to me now.

Talk about rude.

You just waltzed into that class

and turned it into
the Overton Show.

Staring Overton

with his trusty sidekick,
Professor Fletcher.

Oh, I see.

So, you intimidated by
the fact that Overton is not

just a simple handyman
any more, huh?

That's right. Just
a big old wind bag!

Well, um, I got a little
news flash for you, girlie.

I like that class.

And I'm good in that class.

And I'm stayin'
in... that class.

God, I miss him so!

Hey, Overton. Where's Synclaire?

Don't know, and don't care.

Well, art mavens..

I finished grading your quizzes

and I'm pleased to report that
at least half of you understood

what I've been talking about.

As for the rest of you,
it's only night school.

Who really cares?

Once again, Synclaire James

had one of the most
insightful essays

and with her permission
I'd like to read a portion.

Synclaire.

Um, Miss James?

Um, she'll be here.

No she won't.

I chased her away.

I grieve that I asked.

I grieve, too.

See my, my beautiful Synclaire
was like this Venus here.

And I'm like the clamp
shell she's standin' on.

Only, instead of holdin' her
up, I just... slam shut on her.

I just like to say, if we
can all learn to relate art

to our personal lives,
the way Overton has

I'm sure we'd be
just as embarrassed

for ourselves,
as we are for him.

Oh, freedom!

Yeah, I'll see
you. I'll see you.

New releases.

Microwave popping corn!

Oh, yes, we're gonna pop you.

Yes, I am. Yes, I
am gonna pop you.

I'm gonna pop you.

For shame! For shame, Khadijah!

It's not how it looks.

Uh‐huh? What's in the microwave?

Generic budget dinner.

You're pathetic, you know that?

Did you drop something
on the way to the market?

My shopping list.

‐ Excuse me? ‐ My shopping list.

Replete with brand
names and extravagances.

Look at this, mineral water,
air freshener, pre‐cut salad.

Why don't you
just spit in my face?

It'll never happen again.

You know what your
problem is? You can't commit.

Khadija, I'm afraid
I can no longer

be your financial advisor.

No, I need you!

You can't be
trusted. No. No, look..

‐ Please. ‐ No.

I say we end this now.

Okay, Kyle, maybe you're right.

But if I need you, can I
call you for some advice?

Just give me some time, Khadija.

Aren't you supposed
to be in class?

Yes, but I knew
Overton would be there

so I wandered around.

I... had a conversation
with a woman on a bench.

I... realized she
was talking to herself.

Hey, everyone.

‐ Synclaire. ‐ Overton.

Uh, let's get outta here.

I got some movies.
They're already paid for.

Oh, you're a cheap date!

You know, I mean
that as a compliment.

So, um... where
were you tonight?

I just thought it'd
be better for us

if I stopped goin' to class.

Come on, girl, you
know you love that class.

Besides, the only
reason I signed up

was so we could spend
more time together.

That's sweet, Overton.

But I realize that I also need
a place that's just for me.

You see, at work, it's
always about Khadijah.

And at home, it's always
about Khadijah and Regine

and Maxine and
Kyle and you, then me.

I'm like Eve Tange in
the surrealist movement.

‐ Who? ‐ Exactly!

I'm overshadowed the way
he was by Salvador Dali.

‐ Who? ‐ Oh, it doesn't matter.

Yeah, well, you do deserve
a place that is special to you.

I mean, hey, I got
that in the basement.

So... I'm gonna drop the class.

‐ Are you sure? ‐ Positive.

Oh, thank you, Obie!

So is the academic career
of Overtone Wakefield Jones.

I'm gonna miss it.

Well, why don't you
just take another course?

Hmm, it's a good idea.

Maybe I could take
the architecture class

across the hall.

You know, buildings speak to me

the same way that
screamin' dude speaks to you.

Obie, I'm so sorry we
had a fight over this.

Yeah, me too. But you
know what fightin' means?

Makin' up, baby.

It was a really big fight.

You know what? It
was bigger than that.

‐ All finished. ‐ Thank you.

Let's see here.

Baby when you die, that's
gonna be worth something.