Little House on the Prairie (1974–1983): Season 7, Episode 16 - Goodbye, Mrs. Wilder - full transcript

When Mrs, Oleson demands Art and French be added to the school curriculum, Laura quits, leaving Mrs. Oleson to cover the subjects herself.

Laura: NEW YORK CITY
IS DIVIDED UP INTO 5 AREAS.

CAN ANYONE
NAME THEM FOR US?

CAN YOU NAME EVEN ONE?

- HILDY?
- MANHATTAN?

Boy: OW!

WHAT'S THE MATTER?

SOMEBODY HIT ME
WITH A SPIT BALL.
[LAUGHTER]

WILLIE...

I DIDN'T
DO NOTHING.

ANYTHING!

I DIDN'T DO
THAT, EITHER.
[LAUGHTER]



WILLIE, I'D LIKE
JUST ONE DAY TO GO BY

WITHOUT YOU
HAVING TO LEARN
FROM THAT CORNER.

YES, MA'AM.

BUT WHY DO WE HAVE TO
STUDY NEW YORK CITY?

WE'LL PROBABLY
NEVER GO THERE.

IN CASE YOU DO.
IN CASE YOU GO ANYWHERE
OUTSIDE OF MINNESOTA,

YOU'LL HAVE SOMETHING
BESIDES TOTAL IGNORANCE
TO TAKE WITH YOU.

Albert: [LAUGHS]
Laura: NOW, HILDY...

MANHATTAN IS ONE
OF THE 5 AREAS.
CAN YOU NAME THE OTHER 4?

NO, MA'AM.

Laura: CAN ANYBODY?

THEY ARE QUEENS,
STATEN ISLAND,
BROOKLYN, AND THE BRONX.

Laura:
NOW, THEY AND MANHATTAN
SHARE A COMMON DESIGNATION,

SUCH AS TOWN, CITY,
COUNTY, STATE.



CAN ANYONE TELL ME WHAT
THAT DESIGNATION IS?

Laura: WILLIE,
CAN YOU TELL ME?

UH, GEE,
I DON'T THINK SO.

THEY'RE CALLED
BOROUGHS.

- REALLY?
- REALLY!

I THOUGHT BURROS
WERE SOME KIND
OF A DONKEY.

[LAUGHTER]

HONEST, THAT'S
WHAT I HEARD.

THAT'S A DIFFERENT
SPELLING.

NOW, I'M REFERRING
TO "BOROUGH,"

AS IN B-O-R-O-U-G-H.

YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT
SIMPLY "BURRO,"

B-U-R-R-O.

[BRAYING]

[LAUGHTER]

WILLIE OLESON,
IN THE CORNER.

Willie: I DIDN'T...

NOW, THOUGH IT'S NOT
COMPLETED YET, THE...

THE BROOKLYN BRIDGE
IS BEING CONSIDERED

THE ENGINEERING MARVEL
OF THE 19th CENTURY.

NOW, IT'S SITUATED
AT THE SOUTHERN
TIP OF MANHATTAN

ACROSS THE EAST
RIVER TO...?

CAN ANYONE TELL ME
WHICH BOROUGH?

IT'S CALLED
THE BROOKLYN BRIDGE.

DOES ANYONE FIND IT
LOGICAL THAT IT MIGHT BE
CONNECTED TO BROOKLYN?

Harriet:
YOO-HOO?

[CHUCKLES]
EXCUSE ME.

I'M SO SORRY.
I DON'T MEAN TO
INTERRUPT, BUT I...

HI, MA.

UH...WILLIE,
TAKE YOUR SEAT.

[LAUGHS]
OH, THIS IS
MR. STOHLER.

HE'S FROM THE BOARD
OF EDUCATION.

Laura: OH, IT'S
A PLEASURE TO MEET YOU.

MRS. WILDER.

HE'S HERE TO MAKE
AN EVALUATION.

AN EVALUATION?

FOR THE SCHOOL
IMPROVEMENT PROGRAM.

OH, YES!

YES, THE STATE
IS PREPARED TO FUND
A PORTION OF YOUR NEEDS,

IF THEY'RE FOUND
TO BE JUSTIFIED.

WELL, WE ARE SHORT
OF A FEW THINGS,

AND THE BUILDING COULD
USE SOME REPAIRING.

WELL, I'LL LOOK
OVER YOUR SITUATION
AND FILE MY REPORT.

Mr. Stohler: IN THE
MEANTIME, I'D LIKE TO
MONITOR THE CLASS, IF I MAY.

OH, OF COURSE.

WE'RE STUDYING THE MAJOR
CITIES OF THE UNITED
STATES RIGHT NOW,

WHAT MAKES THEM
SPECIAL AND SO FORTH.

SOUNDS
INTERESTING.

YES, WELL, WE'LL
JUST SIT IN THE BACK.

YOU JUST CARRY ON
AS IF WE WEREN'T HERE.

THE ATLANTIC OCEAN
AND 3 RIVERS

CAUSE MANHATTAN
TO BE AN ISLAND.

CAN ANYONE NAME
THOSE 3 RIVERS?

Laura: CARRIE?

MARIA?

WILLIE?

WHOA.

[DOOR SLAMS]

Almanzo: I'M HOME!

MANLY, COULD YOU
PLEASE NOT SLAM
THE DOOR THAT WAY?

Almanzo: SORRY.

SOUNDS LIKE YOU HAD
SOME KIND OF A DAY.

YOU WANT TO KNOW
WHAT KIND OF
A DAY I HAD?

I HAD THE KIND
OF A DAY

THAT MAKES ME WONDER
WHY I EVER WANTED

TO BE A TEACHER
IN THE FIRST PLACE.

WHERE ARE ALL
THOSE SHINING FACES

FILLED WITH
THE EXCITEMENT
OF LEARNING?

WHAT MAKES OTHERWISE
INTELLIGENT STUDENTS
SUDDENLY BECOME RUDE,

UNRULY, AND STUPID?

WHAT HAS TURNED TEACHING
INTO AN EXERCISE
IN FORCE-FEEDING?

SOUNDS PRETTY
BAD ALL RIGHT.

THE WORST OF IT IS

MRS. OLESON BRINGS
A REPRESENTATIVE OF
THE SCHOOL BOARD IN

TO WATCH ME BE
MADE A FOOL OF.

LISTEN, WHY DON'T
YOU SIT DOWN FOR
A WHILE AND RELAX?

I CAN'T.
I HAVE TO MAKE SUPPER.

WELL,
IT'S EARLY!

I HAVE TO GO BACK.

WHY?

BECAUSE MRS. OLESON CALLED
AN EMERGENCY MEETING
OF THE SCHOOL BOARD.

I HAVE NEVER MET ANYONE
THAT GETS ON MY NERVES
MORE THAN THAT WOMAN.

OH, NOW...

I'D BEST GO
UNHITCH THE HORSES.

THE POINT IS THAT OUR
SCHOOL IS JUST NOT UP
TO THE STANDARDS

OF THE OTHER SCHOOLS
IN THE STATE.

Harriet: SO, WHEN
MR. STOHLER RETURNS
IN A COUPLE OF WEEKS,

UNLESS WE HAVE
AN IMPROVED CURRICULUM,

WE'RE JUST NOT GOING
TO GET THE FUNDS
THAT WE NEED

FOR THE IMPROVEMENTS AND
REPAIRS AND EQUIPMENT
AND NEW TEXTBOOKS.

WHAT DOES
MR. STOHLER
OBJECT TO?

WELL, HE FEELS
THAT THE TEACHING
OF THE 3 Rs

IS JUST NOT
ADEQUATE ANYMORE.

WHAT KIND OF
SUBJECTS DO YOU
THINK WE SHOULD ADD?

WELL, ART
APPRECIATION,
FOR ONE THING,

AND FRENCH...

ART APPRECIATION
AND FRENCH?

THEN THERE'S THE MATTER
OF THE DRESS CODE.

WHY, SOME OF THE CHILDREN
COME TO SCHOOL LOOKING LIKE
COMMON LITTLE BEGGARS.

MRS. OLESON, THE
CHILDREN YOU'RE
REFERRING TO

COME FROM
DESPERATELY
POOR FAMILIES.

NOW, THEIR CLOTHES
MAY BE IN TATTERS,

BUT AT LEAST I MAKE
SURE THAT THEY'RE
CLEAN TATTERS.

YES, I'M SURE
THAT YOU DO...

NOW, I DO KNOW SOMETHING
ABOUT ART APPRECIATION,

BUT I CAN BARELY GRASP
THE BASICS OF FRENCH.

WELL, I CAN MOST
CERTAINLY COACH YOU.

WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY
IS THAT MY STUDENTS

NEED TO PUSH
THEMSELVES TO HANDLE
THE ESSENTIAL SUBJECTS,

LIKE MATH AND HISTORY,
AND READING AND WRITING
AND SPELLING.

WELL, IF OTHER SCHOOLS
CAN EXPAND THEIR CURRICULUM,

THEN SURELY WE CAN, TOO.

OTHER SCHOOLS HAVE
MORE THAN ONE TEACHER.

OH, ARE YOU TELLING US

THAT YOU CAN'T DEAL
WITH SUCH A SCHEDULE?

I CAN DEAL WITH IT,

BUT AT THE EXPENSE
OF THE MORE
PRACTICAL SUBJECTS.

MRS. OLESON,
I AGREE WITH
MY DAUGHTER.

I MEAN, THESE ARE
CHILDREN FROM HARDWORKING
FARM FAMILIES.

THEY'RE GOING TO
GROW UP TO BE FARMERS
OR THE WIVES OF FARMERS.

I THINK THEY NEED
TO KNOW MORE ABOUT
BUSHELS AND PECKS

THAN THEY DO SOME
FOREIGN LANGUAGE
THEY'LL LIKELY NEVER USE.

THAT'S A GOOD POINT,
HARRIET.

OH, IS THAT SO?

Nels: YES!

CAN YOU IMAGINE
WILLIE TAKING ON
TWO MORE SUBJECTS?

HE'D BE IN SCHOOL
THE REST OF HIS LIFE.

IT WOULD BE
TOO MUCH FOR ANY
OF THE STUDENTS.

WELL, PROPERLY
TAUGHT, I'M SURE THAT
THEY COULD MANAGE.

PROPERLY TAUGHT?

Harriet:
YES, INDEED.

NOW, PERHAPS YOU
HAVE FORGOTTEN,

BUT I DO POSSESS
A TEACHING CERTIFICATE.

OF COURSE,
I MARRIED NELS.

I WOULD HAVE HAD
A VERY IMPORTANT
CAREER OTHERWISE,

BUT I CERTAINLY
AM QUALIFIED TO JUDGE
TEACHING CAPABILITIES.

AND MINE ARE LACKING.
IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE
TRYING TO SAY?

WELL, IF TODAY WAS
ANY EXAMPLE OF...

Nels: HARRIET.

THAT'S NOT FAIR.

NO, MR. OLESON, WE
DID HAVE A BAD DAY.

TO SAY THE VERY LEAST.

NOW, I THINK THAT
WE MUST FACE THE FACT

THAT IF WE ARE GOING
TO GET ANY KIND
OF STATE FUNDING,

WE ARE GOING TO HAVE
TO ALTER THE CURRICULUM
AS I HAVE SUGGESTED.

I SAY WE DO WITHOUT
STATE FUNDING.

Harriet:
OH, WELL, FINE!

THEN LET THE REST OF
THE TOWN BEAR THE BURDEN
OF THE EXPENSE.

NOW, ALL IN FAVOR OF
THE NEW PLAN, PLEASE,
RAISE YOUR HANDS.

ABSTAIN.

Harriet: OPPOSED?

WELL, LAURA, IT
SEEMS THAT YOU'VE
BEEN OVERRULED.

I GUESS WE HAVE TO
ACCEPT MAJORITY
RULE, DON'T WE?

YES, I GUESS WE DO.

MRS. OLESON,
ARE YOU SURE

THAT ONE TEACHER CAN
HANDLE THIS SCHEDULE?

[CHUCKLING]

YES, YES,
OF COURSE.

GOOD.
I WISH YOU LUCK.

WHAT?

BECAUSE I QUIT.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
MEET YOUR NEW
SCHOOLTEACHER.

GRACE IS ALL
TUCKED IN.

SHOULDN'T WE
GET READY FOR BED?

I'M JUST
FINISHING UP.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

I'M TRYING TO FIGURE
OUT WHAT MRS. OLESON'S

NEW DRESS CODE IS
GOING TO COST US.

IT CAN'T BE
THAT MUCH.

WHATEVER IT IS,
IT'S TOO MUCH.

IT'S JUST PLAIN
FOOLISHNESS.

CAN I HAVE ANOTHER
PIECE OF CAKE?

OH, I'M
SAVING THAT FOR
TOMORROW NIGHT.

I DON'T KNOW WHY
I'M SO HUNGRY.

HERE,
HAVE AN APPLE.

THANKS.

CARRIE IS GOING
TO NEED A NEW DRESS,
SOME WHITE STOCKINGS...

ALBERT IS GOING
TO NEED AT LEAST
TWO NEW SHIRTS,

BLACK STOCKINGS,
STRING TIE.

I ALREADY MADE
THE STRING
TIE MYSELF.

YOU CAN FORGET
THE BLACK STOCKINGS.

Caroline:
YOU ONLY HAVE
ONE PAIR.

THAT'S GOOD ENOUGH
FOR CHURCH ON SUNDAY,

AND I'M NOT WEARING
STOCKINGS TO SCHOOL.

[LAUGHS]
THAT'LL HELP
A LITTLE MORE.

YEAH, WE'VE GOT TO PAY
IT. THERE'S NOTHING
WE CAN DO ABOUT IT.

ARE YOU STILL
WORRIED ABOUT LAURA?

I CAN'T HELP IT.

TEACHING'S BEEN SUCH
AN IMPORTANT PART
OF HER LIFE,

I DON'T SEE HOW
SHE CAN BE HAPPY
WITHOUT IT.

OH, MAYBE WE'RE
MAKING A MISTAKE.

MAYBE TEACHING ISN'T
THAT IMPORTANT.

I MEAN, MAYBE SHE
WANTED TO QUIT,

AND THIS JUST GAVE HER
THE EXCUSE, THAT'S ALL.

CHARLES, YOU
DON'T BELIEVE THAT.

NO, I DON'T.

LET'S GO TO BED.

WILL YOU TURN OUT
THE LIGHTS?

SURE.

THANK YOU,
MRS. OLESON.

[BELL RINGING]

Harriet: TIME FOR
SCHOOL, CHILDREN!

TIME FOR SCHOOL!
[LAUGHS]

Harriet: YES, COME ON,
HURRY UP. COME ON.

IT'S GOING TO BE
FUN, NOW.

COME ON, JED!
[LAUGHS]

COME ALONG.
HURRY UP, FOR
HEAVEN'S SAKES.

Harriet: YES.
COME IN, CHILDREN.
COME ON, NOW.

ALL RIGHT,
BOYS AND GIRLS,

LINE UP FOR INSPECTION.

GIRLS ON THIS SIDE,
BOYS ON THAT SIDE.

HURRY UP, HURRY UP,
TAKE YOUR PLACES.

LET ME SEE, MARIA.

YES, VERY NICE.
YES, GET YOUR
TIE STRAIGHT.

VERY NICE, HONEY.
STAND IN LINE.

THERE YOU ARE.

AH, WHERE ARE YOUR WHITE
STOCKINGS, YOUNG LADY?

MY FOLKS DON'T HAVE
THE MONEY TO AFFORD THEM.

OH, I SEE.

WELL, COULD THEY AFFORD
ONE PENNY EVERY WEEK?

I THINK SO!

ALL RIGHT, THEN YOU COME
IN TO THE MERCANTILE
AFTER SCHOOL,

AND WE'LL GET YOU
SOME WHITE STOCKINGS.

YES, MA'AM.

ALL RIGHT, DARLING.
OH, ALL RIGHT, CARRIE.

LET ME SEE.

YES, VERY NICE.

Harriet:
YES, YOU LOOK NICE
AND NEAT AND CLEAN.

WELL, STAND UP
STRAIGHT, FOR
HEAVEN'S SAKES.

ALL RIGHT,
YES, WILLIE.

OH! YOUR SHOES
ARE ALL SCUFFED,
ALBERT...

ALBERT INGALLS.

YES, MA'AM?

DON'T TELL ME
THAT YOUR PARENTS

CAN'T AFFORD
BLACK STOCKINGS.

NO, MA'AM.

HMM.
THEN WHERE ARE THEY?

THEY'RE AT HOME.

I ONLY WEAR THEM FOR
SPECIAL OCCASIONS.

OH, I SEE.

AND SCHOOL IS NOT
A SPECIAL OCCASION?

I GUESS SO.

BUT THEY'RE JUST
NOT COMFORTABLE.

WELL, THAT'S TOO BAD.

NOW, WHILE I'M HERE,

YOU ARE GOING
TO LEARN FROM ME

THAT A DRESS CODE
IS A DRESS CODE,

AND YOU ARE GOING TO
BE REQUIRED TO DO IT,

JUST LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE.

IS THAT CLEAR?

- YES, MA'AM.
- ALL RIGHT, VERY GOOD.

ALL RIGHT,
YOU'RE FINE.
OH, CLAY, YOUR TIE.

Harriet: ALL RIGHT,
EVERYONE, SIT DOWN NOW.
WE'RE GOING TO START.

HURRY UP,
SIT DOWN, DARLINGS.

VERY NICE...

NOW, WE'RE
GOING TO BEGIN...

Parker: EXCUSE ME.

YES?

MY NAME'S PARKER.
MY BOY RALPH HERE
IS STARTING SCHOOL TODAY.

UH-HUH, MR. PARKER
AND RALPH.

HOW COME EVERYBODY
IS DRESSED THE SAME?

BECAUSE I REQUIRE IT.

I AIN'T GETTING
UP LIKE THAT.

YOU DO
AS YOU'RE TOLD.

IT LOOKS DUMB.

MIND YOUR MOUTH,
BOY. I'LL BE PUTTING
A FIST IN IT.

HE'LL HAVE
THE PROPER
CLOTHES TOMORROW.

OH, VERY GOOD.

IF YOU'LL
JUST TAKE A SEAT

RIGHT BACK THERE
IN THE LAST ROW, RALPH.

ALL RIGHT, CHILDREN.

NOW, WE'RE GOING
TO BEGIN TODAY WITH
A LECTURE ON RENAISS--

[RASPBERRY]

[LAUGHTER]

WHO MADE
THAT RUDE NOISE?

OUCH!

- [LAUGHTER]
- WILLIE OLESON!

IT WASN'T ME!
IT WAS...

OH...

IN THE CORNER.

HONEST, MA!

NOT ANOTHER WORD.

[LAUGHTER]

AIMEZ-VOUS
MA NOUVELLE ROBE?

OUI, J'AIME VOTRE
NOUVELLE ROBE.

AVEZ-VOUS VOTRE
PARAPLUIE BLEU?

NON, JE N'AI PAS
MON PARAPLUIE BLEU.

HARRIET, WILL YOU
STOP THE CATERWAULING
AND FIX SUPPER?

CATERWAULING!
I'M NOT CATERWAULING!

I'M PREPARING AN EXERCISE
FOR TOMORROW'S CLASS.

IS THAT SO?

YES, THAT'S SO.

I ASK THE CLASS
A QUESTION IN FRENCH,

AND THEY RESPOND
IN FRENCH.

- REALLY?
- YES, REALLY!

HOW WOULD YOU
ASK THE QUESTION,

"DO YOU THINK SUPPER
WILL EVER BE READY?"

AH...
CROYEZ-VOUS...

OH! THAT'S NOT
VERY FUNNY, NELS.

IF THE ANSWER
IS ANYTHING BUT
"YES, IN 5 MINUTES,"

I'M GOING TO
THE RESTAURANT.

OH, WELL,
VA AU RESTAURANT!

QUEL IMBECILE!

BETE...BETEMENT.

UH...BRUTE!

IDIOT!
VA AU RESTAURANT!

JE SUIS...JE SUIS...

VERY HAPPY THAT
YOU'RE GOING TO
THE RESTAURANT.

LISTEN, AS
SOON AS YOU EAT
YOUR BREAKFAST

YOU CAN COME OUTSIDE
AND WATCH PA FIX
THE BARN ROOF.

WANT TO DO THAT?

HUH, DO YOU? OKAY.

THAT'S A GOOD GIRL,
AND ALL YOU'VE GOT TO DO

IS EAT
THESE WONDERFUL
EGGIES I MADE.

YOU LIKE EGGIES?

YOU DON'T LIKE
EGGIES, HUH?

WHAT ABOUT YOUR DOLLY?
SHE LIKES EGGIES.

SHE ATE A LOT OF
EGGS THIS MORNING,
DIDN'T SHE?

WHY DIDN'T
SHE EAT EGGS?

DIDN'T SHE
EAT EGGS?

NO, SHE STAYED HOME!

SHE STAYED HOME?

WELL,
YOU'RE HOME.

NO, NO, IN MY HOUSE!

WELL, IT'S MY HOUSE, TOO.

AND I ATE MY EGGS
THIS MORNING.
DON'T YOU WANT SOME?

NO? WOULD YOU
EAT THEM IF MOMMY
ASKED YOU TO EAT THEM?

WHY WON'T YOU EAT THEM
WHEN PA ASKS YOU TO?

A LITTLE BIT?

NO? YOU DON'T
WANT THEM?

HOW ABOUT SOME TOAST?

I'LL MAKE YOU TOAST.

ALBERT?

Albert:
YES, SIR?

WHAT'S TAKING YOU
SO LONG UP THERE?

I'LL BE RIGHT THERE.

Charles: HURRY UP.
YOUR MA AND SISTER LEFT
FOR TOWN 10 MINUTES AGO.

I'LL CATCH UP.

I'M JUST PUTTING ON
MY SOCKS.

WELL, SEE TO IT
YOU'RE NOT LATE.

YES, SIR,
I WON'T BE.

THERE.

IF I HAD SOME WHITE
PAINT I WOULDN'T HAVE
TO WEAR THIS DUMB SHIRT.

Harriet: FOR ART
APPRECIATION THIS MORNING,

WE'RE GOING TO HAVE
A VERY FAMOUS ARTIST--
LEONARDO DA VINCI.

THESE ARE SOME EXAMPLES
OF RENAISSANCE ART.

Harriet: I KNOW THAT
YOU HAVEN'T HEARD
OF THEM YET...

Willie: THIS IS BORING.
Harriet: BUT YOU WILL.

THIS IS TYPICAL
OF THE PERIOD,

VERY, VERY
BEAUTIFULLY DONE.

AND THIS ONE...

[LAUGHTER]

Harriet:
THERE'S NOTHING FUNNY
ABOUT THIS, YOU KNOW?

AND THIS ONE
IS A VERY MODEST
YOUNG MAIDEN.

[LAUGHTER]

AHH, OHH...

Ralph: I AIN'T TAKING
THIS MUCH LONGER.

Albert: ME, NEITHER.

- FRENCH.
- YEAH.

DRESSING UP LIKE
A BUNCH OF SISSIES.

AT LEAST I STILL
DON'T WEAR SOCKS.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
SHE GIVES US THE ONCE-OVER
EVERY MORNING, DOESN'T SHE?

COAL DUST.

[LAUGHS]

IT COMES OFF
REAL EASY.

[LAUGHTER]

MRS. OLESON?

OH, YES, HOW NICE
TO SEE YOU, MR. PARKER.

MY BOY SAYS YOU'VE
BEEN SHOWING DIRTY
PICTURES IN HERE.

HE WHAT?

TRUE OR NOT?

OF COURSE NOT!

WHY, THAT'S
AN ABSOLUTE,
FILTHY LIE.

YOU AIN'T
BEEN SHOWING...
NAKED LADIES?

MR. PARKER,
THE HUMAN BODY

HAS BEEN THE SUBJECT
OF SOME OF OUR GREATEST
ART TREASURES.

THEN YOU'D
BE SHOWING THEM?

WELL, WE'VE
BEEN STUDYING
RENAISSANCE...

WHAT I BE TALKING
ABOUT IS LADIES
WITH NO CLOTHES ON.

THEY'RE CALLED NUDES,
MR. PARKER.

NOW, THERE'S
ABSOLUTELY
NOTHING WRONG...

I'LL BE JUDGING
IF IT BE WRONG.

MR. PARKER,
I INSIST...

JEHOSHAPHAT.

GREAT SCREAMING GHOSTS.

OH, FOR HEAVEN'S SAKES.
THIS IS A VERY FAMOUS
PAINTING.

IT'S CALLED
"THE BATHERS."

WHAT THIS BE CALLED,
MRS. OLESON?

OH, WELL,
THAT'S A...

Parker:
WHAT IT BE CALLED?

IT'S CALLED "THE RAPE
OF THE SABINE WOMEN."

I'VE SEEN THINGS
IN THIS LIFE I WISH
I HADN'T HAVE,

BUT THIS IS
ABOUT THE WORST.

[SIGHS]

TEACHING
YOUNG'UNS ABOUT...
I CAN'T EVEN SAY IT!

Parker:
THIS BE THE END
OF IT, MRS. OLESON,

OR I BE CALLING
IN THE LAW.

Laura: MORE COFFEE?

HMM, NO,
THANKS.

NONE FOR ME.
I'LL BE UP
ALL NIGHT.

- MANLY?
- I'LL HAVE A TOUCH.

OOH, THAT
WAS THE MOST
WONDERFUL MEAL.

MMM,
SURE WAS.

I'M GETTING
DOWNRIGHT SPOILED.

IT'S LIKE THIS
MOST EVERY NIGHT.

AND THIS
HOUSE, IT
FAIRLY GLOWS.

IT SURE DOES.

THE GLASS IN
THE WINDOWS IS SO CLEAN
YOU CAN BARELY SEE IT

WHEN THERE'S NOTHING
REFLECTING IN IT.

AND WHAT HAPPENS
WHEN YOU RUN OUT
OF THINGS TO DO?

I GUESS I'LL JUST HAVE
TO DO THEM ALL OVER AGAIN.

HOW'S YOUR GARDEN
COMING ALONG?

FINE.

IT HELPS KEEP HER BUSY.

ALL THIS TALK ABOUT
ME KEEPING BUSY...

IT'S LIKE EVERYBODY'S
WORRIED ABOUT ME
NOT FEELING USEFUL.

GEE, HONEY, I DON'T THINK
ANY OF US MEAN IT THAT WAY.

THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

WE KNOW IT'S
AN ADJUSTMENT FOR YOU.

WELL, SURE IT IS.
TEACHING MEANT
A GREAT DEAL TO YOU.

IT TOOK A LOT
OF YOUR TIME.

I GUESS IT DID.

HEY...

WE JUST WANT TO
KNOW YOU'RE HAPPY,
THAT'S ALL.

YES.

WELL, YOU DON'T
HAVE TO WORRY.

I KNOW IT'S
A DIFFERENT LIFE,

BUT KNOWING THAT
I'M A GOOD HOUSEWIFE...

AND A GOOD HOMEMAKER...

WELL, IT'S JUST...

LAURA.

I KNOW THAT TAKING
CARE OF MANLY

AND TAKING CARE OF
THE HOUSE SHOULD BE ENOUGH,

BUT IT'S JUST NOT.

WITHOUT MY TEACHING...

I JUST FEEL SO USELESS.

[SOBBING]

I'M SORRY.

I JUST FELT LIKE
CRYING ALL DAY,

AND ALL OF
A SUDDEN IT
HAPPENED.

WELL, THAT'S ALL RIGHT.
NOW, I UNDERSTAND.

I WISH I UNDERSTOOD.

I DON'T KNOW WHY
I'M ACTING THIS WAY.

LORD KNOWS
I'VE BEEN BUSY.

WELL, IT'S LIKE
YOUR PA SAID,

THAT TEACHING
MEANS A LOT TO YOU.

BUT I'M NOT
TEACHING ANYMORE.

ANYWAY, IT'S
SILLY OF ME TO BE
ACTING THIS WAY.

THAT'S IT.
NO MORE CRYING.

I'M GOING TO MAKE
THIS WORK FOR ME.

YOU WAIT AND SEE.

I KNOW YOU WILL.

WHY DON'T YOU
COME OUT NOW?

SHOW YOUR FOLKS THAT
YOU'RE ALL RIGHT.

I'VE GOT TO PUT ON
A FRESH POT OF COFFEE.

I CAN DO THAT.

NONSENSE. YOU GO ON.

I LOVE YOU, HONEY.

I LOVE YOU, TOO.

GO ON.

OKAY.

ALL RIGHT, NOW,
REPEAT AFTER ME.

UN, DEUX, TROIS.

All: UN, DEUX, TROIS.

SIT UP.

QUATRE, CINQ, SIX.

All: QUATRE, CINQ, SIX.

SEPT, HUIT, NEUF.

All: SEPT, HUIT, NEUF.

Harriet: DIX.

All: DIX.

[SIGHS]

WELL, YOUR PRONUNCIATION
IS NOT VERY GOOD AT ALL.

NOW, THE FRENCH LANGUAGE

HAS FAR DIFFERENT SOUNDS
THAN WE ARE USED TO.

LET'S HAVE
A DEMONSTRATION.

ALBERT,

Harriet: LEVEZ-VOUS,
S'IL VOUS PLAIT.

THAT MEANS
STAND UP, PLEASE.

Willie, French accent:
STAND UP, ALBERT.

Harriet: LEVEZ-VOUS,
S'IL VOUS PLAIT, ALBERT.

NOW, REPEAT AFTER ME.

UN, DEUX, TROIS.

UHN, DUN, TWA.

Harriet:
NO, NO "DUN."

UN.

UN.

- DEUX, TROIS.
- DEUX.

TWA.

Harriet:
TROIS.

Albert:
UHN, DUH, TO...

TROIS!

- AAH!
- [LAUGHTER]

WILLIE.
HOW DARE YOU?

Harriet:
IN THE CORNER.

BUT HE WAS
PULLING MY HAIR.

RALPH,
IS THAT TRUE?

WHY'D I WANT
TO DO A THING
LIKE THAT FOR?

WILLIE,
IN THE CORNER.

- HE DID.
- IN THE CORNER.

- HE WAS PULLING MY...
- IN THE CORNER!

- MA!
- WILLIE!

Albert: IN THE CORNER.

Harriet: DISGRACING ME
IN FRONT OF EVERYBODY.

NOW, CHILDREN...

ALBERT,
REPEAT AFTER ME.

UN, DEUX, TROIS.

UHN, DUN, TWA.

Ralph: UHN, DUN, TWA.

Albert: CUT IT OUT.

Willie:
HEY, RALPH.

THAT'S THE LAST
TIME YOU PULL
ANYTHING ON ME.

OH, YEAH?

YEAH!

- OH, MY HAND!
- [LAUGHS]

OH, OH, MY HAND.

OH!

ABOUT THE ONLY
FUN LEFT IN SCHOOL

ARE THOSE TRICKS
YOU PLAY ON WILLIE.

YEAH,
I GUESS SO.

WHEN MY SISTER WAS
TEACHING, IT WAS
REAL INTERESTING.

MAYBE WE CAN
GET HER BACK.

HOW?

BY GETTING RID
OF MRS. OLESON.

WHEN IS THAT FELLOW
FROM THE STATE
COMING BACK?

TOMORROW.

YEAH.

SEE YOU TOMORROW.

ALL RIGHT,
SEE YOU LATER.

HI, LAURA.

HI, ALBERT.

HOW'S THE GARDEN?

STUBBORN, THAT'S HOW.

ANYTHING IN
PARTICULAR YOU WANTED?

JUST TO TALK.

EVERYBODY IS
PRETTY FED UP
WITH MRS. OLESON.

JOIN THE CLUB.

EVEN THE SUBJECTS
I USED TO LIKE
ARE NO FUN ANYMORE.

ALBERT, I DON'T
KNOW WHAT TO
TELL YOU.

I WISH
YOU WERE BACK.

TRUTH IS, SO DO I.

YOU DO?

YOU KNOW...
I WAS SECRETLY HOPING

THAT MRS. OLESON
WOULD DO SO BADLY

THEY WOULD COME TO ME
AND BEG ME TO GO BACK.

AND ON MY TERMS.

THEY STILL MIGHT.

I DON'T THINK SO.

THIS CAN'T
BE MUCH FUN.

WELL, IT DOESN'T
MATTER, DOES IT?

THIS IS ALL I'VE GOT,
AND I'M DETERMINED
TO MAKE IT WORK.

THE MAN FROM
THE STATE IS COMING
BACK TOMORROW.

OH.

AND IF HE DOESN'T
LIKE WHAT HE SEES,

WE AREN'T GOING TO
GET ANY STATE FUNDS.

AND IF WE DON'T GET
ANY STATE FUNDS...

ALBERT...
ARE YOU TRYING
TO SAY SOMETHING?

NO. JUST IF HE
DOESN'T LIKE THE JOB
MRS. OLESON'S DONE,

AND WE DON'T GET
THE MONEY

I DON'T THINK
SHE'S GOING TO
WANT TO STAY ON.

YOU'RE UP
TO SOMETHING,
AREN'T YOU?

ME? LIKE WHAT?

I WAS JUST ASKING.

YOU WOULDN'T MIND IF
MRS. OLESON QUIT, AND
YOU SAID SO YOURSELF.

WELL, YES, I DID.

AND YOU JUST
NEVER KNOW ABOUT
THESE THINGS,

THAT'S ALL.

I'VE GOT TO GO.
I'LL SEE YOU LATER.

BYE.

BYE-BYE.

Almanzo:
YOU REALLY THINK HE'S
GOING TO DO SOMETHING?

Laura: I DON'T KNOW,
BUT ALBERT GETS A
CERTAIN LOOK IN HIS EYE

WHEN HE'S UP TO SOMETHING,
AND HE HAD THAT LOOK.

BESIDES, I THINK IT
WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA

IF I WAS THERE WHEN
MR. STOHLER ARRIVED.

WHAT'S THIS?

- IT'S A SPECIAL TREAT.
- CHICKEN.

NOT JUST CHICKEN.
IT'S LEMON CHICKEN.
TRY IT. YOU'LL LOVE IT.

WHAT IS ALL THIS STUFF
STICKING TO IT HERE?

THAT'S CALLED ASPIC.

OH.

IT'S COLD.

[LAUGHS]
OF COURSE IT IS, SILLY.
I HAD IT ON ICE ALL DAY.

IT'S SUPPOSED
TO BE THAT WAY.

IT'S A NICE CHANGE IN
THE HOT SUMMER WEATHER.

THERE'S POTATO SALAD
IF YOU WANT SOME.

WHAT'S ALL THIS STUFF?
WHAT ARE ALL THESE
SPECKLES ON THIS HERE?

THAT'S CALLED TARRAGON.
IT'S AN HERB.

THAT'S WHAT
I'M TASTING, HUH?

MANLY, THIS IS
A VERY SPECIAL DISH.

IT TOOK ALL DAY
TO PREPARE.

I'M SORRY, HONEY,
IT JUST DOESN'T
TASTE GOOD TO ME.

MAYBE IF I TAKE
THE SKIN OFF,
IT'LL HELP.

HONEY, I SAID
I'M SORRY.

I THINK I LIKED
YOUR CINNAMON
CHICKEN BETTER.

"LA TABLE..."

SUR LA TABLE...

OH...

HARRIET,
IT'S TIME
FOR BED.

OUI, MON CHER.

AND SPEAK
ENGLISH.

OH, NELS, YOU'RE
SUCH AN OLD GROUCH.

HEAVENS.

AREN'T YOU
THE LEAST BIT EXCITED?

ABOUT WHAT?

WELL, MR. STOHLER ARRIVES.

THERE'S NO GUARANTEE
HE'S GOING TO OKAY A GRANT.

Harriet: OH, NELS,
OF COURSE HE WILL.

ONCE HE HEARS MY CLASS
SPEAKING FRENCH...
[LAUGHS]

WELL, I HOPE
HE'S AS IMPRESSED
AS YOU THINK.

OH, HE WILL BE.

ARE YOU GOING
TO COME TO BED
LIKE THAT AGAIN?

YES, I'M GOING
TO COME TO BED
LIKE THAT AGAIN.

AFTER ALL,
I HAVE TO LOOK MY BEST.

JUST ONCE, THAT
THOUGHT OUGHT TO CROSS
YOUR MIND AT BEDTIME.

[CLICKS TONGUE]

YOU KNOW, I FINISHED
ALL MY CHICKEN.

I JUST HAD TO
GET USED TO THAT...

TARRAGON.

YEAH, TARRAGON.

I ATE THE SKIN
AND EVERYTHING.

I'M SORRY.

I DIDN'T MEAN TO
MAKE YOU MAD AT ME.

I JUST HAVE
TO GET USED TO

EATING STUFF
WITH WEEDS ON IT.

THEY'RE NOT WEEDS,
THEY'RE HERBS.

BESIDES, I'M NOT
ANGRY ABOUT THAT.

WHAT, THEN?

I'M ANGRY AT MYSELF.

WHY?

BECAUSE I KNOW
THAT THE CHILDREN ARE
GOING TO DO SOMETHING

TO EMBARRASS
MRS. OLESON TOMORROW.

WHY SHOULD YOU BE
ANGRY WITH YOURSELF
ABOUT THAT?

BECAUSE
I WANT THEM TO.

I WANT THEM
TO EMBARRASS HER

IN FRONT OF MR. STOHLER
SO THAT SHE'LL QUIT.

I SEE.

YOU REALLY WANT
THE TEACHING JOB
BACK, DON'T YOU?

I DO.

OH, MANLY,
I REALLY DO.

WELL, MAYBE YOU'LL
GET YOUR WISH.

I'M GOING TO PUT
THE LAMPS OUT
DOWNSTAIRS.

Laura:
ALMANZO?

YEAH?

DO YOU THINK
IT'S WRONG?

ME WANTING HER
TO QUIT THIS WAY?

YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE
THAT CAN JUDGE THAT.

[SIGHS]

Willie: I CAN'T GO ALONG.
SHE'S MY OWN MA.

Ralph:
OKAY, THEN DON'T.

Albert:
THERE'S ENOUGH OF
US TO MAKE IT WORK.

Ralph:
YEAH. JUST KEEP
YOUR MOUTH SHUT, OKAY?

Willie: YEAH.

[BELL RINGING]

ATTENTION,
MES ENFANTS!

ICI, ICI!

ALLEZ, ALLEZ.
ALLEZ, ALBERT!

Harriet:
ALL RIGHT,
COME ON IN.

COME ON,
HURRY UP. WE HAVE
A CLASS TO DO NOW.

HURRY UP.
HE'S COMING.

HURRY UP,
WILLIE, COME ON!

TAKE YOUR
TIME DAWDLING
ALL THE TIME.

YOU SHOULD SET
A GOOD EXAMPLE.

HURRY UP.
GOOD MORNING,
ALBERT.

Driver: WHOA!

HELLO, MR. STOHLER.
RIGHT ON TIME.

HOW WAS THE TRIP?

HOT AND DUSTY.

WONDER IF I MIGHT
HAVE A GLASS OF WATER.

HOW ABOUT A NICE, COOL
GLASS OF LEMONADE?

PERFECT.

[SHOUTING]

Harriet:
ENOUGH OF THAT!

ALL RIGHT,
THAT'S ENOUGH!

I SAID, STOP IT!

ALBERT!
STOP IT.

I'M ASHAMED OF EACH
AND EVERY ONE OF YOU
WHO IS INVOLVED IN THIS,

ESPECIALLY YOU,
ALBERT INGALLS.

I'M SORRY.

WHAT I DON'T
UNDERSTAND IS WHY.

THEY WANTED TO
EMBARRASS YOU IN
FRONT OF MR. STOHLER.

OH! WHAT FOR?

SO THAT YOU'D LOSE
THE GRANT AND BE
FORCED TO RESIGN.

AND SO THAT
THEY COULD HAVE
BACK A TEACHER

WHO WOULDN'T FORCE
THEM TO LEARN FRENCH
AND FOLLOW A DRESS CODE.

ISN'T THAT
RIGHT, ALBERT?

I APOLOGIZE,
MRS. OLESON.

I SHOULD HAVE
SEEN THIS COMING,
AND I DIDN'T.

WHEN MRS. OLESON
TOOK THIS JOB...

I KNEW IT WAS GOING
TO BE A DIFFICULT ONE,

FAR MORE DIFFICULT
THAN ANYTHING I
HAD TO DEAL WITH.

AND I WAS SURE THAT
SHE WOULD FAIL.

BUT SHE DIDN'T.

Laura: YOU HAVE
CONTINUED TO LEARN,

NOT JUST
THE USUAL SUBJECTS,

BUT YOU HAVE LEARNED
SOME FRENCH,

AND YOU HAVE LEARNED
SOMETHING ABOUT
ART APPRECIATION.

WHAT MRS. OLESON
DESERVES

IS THE HIGHEST
FORM OF RESPECT FOR
HER ACCOMPLISHMENT.

AND WHAT DOES SHE GET?

THIS.

NOW, I WANT YOU
TO GET YOURSELVES

AND THIS ROOM
BACK IN ORDER.

NOW!

Harriet: COME ON NOW,
CHILDREN, SIT DOWN.
HURRY UP.

HURRY UP. SIT DOWN.
LEAVE THAT ALONE.
SIT DOWN.

Harriet: HURRY UP.
THERE. THERE.

AIMEZ-VOUS MA
NOUVELLE ROBE?

Students:
OUI, J'AIME VOTRE
NOUVELLE ROBE.

NOW,
AVEZ-VOUS VOTRE
PARAPLUIE BLEU?

Students: NON, JE N'AI
PAS MON PARAPLUIE BLEU.

OH, EXCELLENT,
CHILDREN.
EXCELLENT!

NOW, I WANT YOU
TO STUDY PAGES
26 THROUGH 30,

BECAUSE TOMORROW
WE'RE GOING
TO HAVE A TEST.

CLASS DISMISSED.

THAT WAS VERY
IMPRESSIVE,
MRS. OLESON.

OH! [LAUGHS]
WHY, THANK YOU.

YES, INDEED.
VERY IMPRESSIVE.

OH.

I'M RECOMMENDING
THE GRANT BE APPROVED.

[GASPS]

WELL, THAT'S
WONDERFUL.

THAT IS VERY
GOOD NEWS.

HOWEVER,
I DO HAVE
A RECOMMENDATION.

OH, YES.

SOME OF THE
EXPANDED CURRICULUM
I DISCUSSED WITH YOU

THAT OTHER SCHOOLS
IN THE STATE UTILIZE,

WELL, THEY
GENERALLY HAVE

A PRACTICAL
APPLICATION RELATING
TO THE REGION.

HOWEVER, ART
APPRECIATION IS
UNIVERSALLY USEFUL.

OH, YES...

BUT, SAY, IN
METROPOLITAN AREAS,

ENGINEERING
IS OFTEN TAUGHT.

YES.

INDUSTRIAL DESIGN
IS ALSO BECOMING
VERY POPULAR.

OH!

AND AS TO
LANGUAGES, WELL...

I MENTIONED FRENCH
ONLY BECAUSE

IN OUR BORDER
COMMUNITIES TO THE NORTH,

PEOPLE DO INDEED
ENCOUNTER A NUMBER OF
FRENCH-SPEAKING CANADIANS.

WELL, YES...

Stohler: SO, THEREFORE,
IT'S A VERY PRACTICAL
THING TO KNOW.

BUT...BUT IN THIS
PART OF THE STATE,

WHO WOULD HAVE
A USE FOR IT?

OH, WELL, UH,
I ALWAYS FELT

THAT A SECOND LANGUAGE
IS VERY VALUABLE.

Stohler:
OH, I DON'T DENY THAT,

BUT LEARNING FRENCH IS
A VERY DIFFICULT THING.

OH, YES.
YES, INDEED.

Stohler: REQUIRING A GREAT
DEAL OF ACADEMIC SKILL.

OH.
[LAUGHS]
YES.

ALSO REQUIRING
A GREAT DEAL OF TIME.

OH.

MR. STOHLER,
ARE YOU SUGGESTING
THAT WE DROP FRENCH?

OH, NOT NECESSARILY.

IF THE MAJORITY OF
YOUR STUDENTS WANT IT,

THEN, BY ALL MEANS,
THEY SHOULD HAVE IT.

BUT IF THEY DON'T...

Stohler:
MRS. OLESON, THIS IS
A FARMING COMMUNITY.

DON'T YOU
THINK IT LIKELY

THAT A GOOD MANY
OF YOUR STUDENTS
WILL BECOME FARMERS?

[CHUCKLES]
YES, I SUPPOSE SO.

GREAT STRIDES HAVE
BEEN MADE IN THE FIELD
OF AGRICULTURE.

Stohler: IN FACT,
THERE'S AN OUTSTANDING NEW
TEXTBOOK ON THE SUBJECT.

AGRICULTURE?

Stohler:
I CAN GIVE YOU
EVERYTHING YOU NEED.

WELL, MR. STOHLER,
I REALLY HADN'T
THOUGHT IN TERMS OF...

THE RETURN STAGE
IS ABOUT READY TO
LEAVE, I THINK.

THANK YOU.

YOU THINK ABOUT IT
AND LET ME KNOW.

AND ONCE AGAIN,

THANK YOU FOR
A REMARKABLE
DEMONSTRATION.

YES, OF COURSE.

I'LL SEE YOU OUT.

THANK YOU.

PRETTY MUCH WHAT LAURA
TOLD YOU, ISN'T IT?

AGRICULTURE.

Albert:
HI, LAURA.

ALBERT.

THIS IS RALPH.
HE'S NEW.

I REMEMBER
SEEING RALPH.

GUESS YOU'RE STILL
PRETTY MAD, HUH?

YOU COULD SAY THAT.

MAYBE WE
WERE WRONG...

MAYBE?

Albert:
ALL RIGHT,
WE WERE WRONG.

BUT WE ONLY DID IT
BECAUSE WE WANTED
YOU BACK SO BAD.

THAT'S GOT TO COUNT
FOR SOMETHING.

SURE, EVERYBODY'S ALWAYS
SAYING HOW MUCH FUN IT
WAS WITH YOU TEACHING.

AND I WOUND UP IN
THE CORNER JUST AS MUCH,
EVEN IF IT WASN'T MY FAULT.

I SUPPOSE I
SHOULD APPRECIATE
YOUR COMPLIMENTS.

I ACCEPT YOUR APOLOGY.

IT WAS VERY NICE
OF YOU ALL TO COME
OUT HERE TO MAKE IT.

THANK YOU.

THAT'S NOT THE ONLY
REASON WE CAME,
MRS. WILDER.

IT ISN'T?

MRS. OLESON SAYS
SHE'LL GIVE UP THE
JOB IF YOU COME BACK.

AND YOU CAN RUN
THE SCHOOL ANY
WAY YOU WANT.

- PLEASE, MRS. WILDER?
- PLEASE?

WE ALL WANT YOU BACK.

ALL RIGHT,
ALL RIGHT.

I'LL COME
BACK ON ONE
CONDITION.

All: WHAT?

THAT YOU ALL AGREE
TO GIVE UP THIS
SILLY DRESS CODE.

All: YES!

[CHILDREN LAUGHING]

Harriet: NELS!

YES, DEAR.

WHY ARE ALL THESE
SHELVES IN SUCH A MESS?

YOU HAVEN'T
KEPT UP WITH THE
INVENTORY AT ALL.

BECAUSE I'VE HAD TO DO
EVERYTHING ELSE, TOO.
ALONE.

OH, FOR
HEAVEN'S SAKES.

IT'S GOING TO TAKE ME
FOREVER TO STRAIGHTEN
THIS OUT NOW.

I HAVE EVERY
CONFIDENCE THAT
YOU WILL SUCCEED.

- HARRIET.
- WHAT?

IT'S GOOD TO
HAVE YOU BACK.

OH, YES,
I'LL BET IT IS.

NO, NOW, LISTEN,
I MEAN IT.

OH, NELS!

AND I'M SORRY
ABOUT THE INVENTORY.

[LAUGHS]

OH, IT'S ALL RIGHT.
I'LL GET IT DONE.

Girls: 3, 4, 5, 6, 7,

8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13...

[BELL RINGING]

GOOD MORNING,
MRS. WILDER.

GOOD MORNING.

THANK YOU.

GOOD MORNING, LAURA.

HI. HI.

GOOD
MORNING.

WELCOME BACK,
MRS. WILDER.

THANK YOU.

GOOD MORNING,
MRS. WILDER.

GOOD MORNING!

Laura: ALL RIGHT, CLASS,
NOW, SINCE YOU'VE ALL VOTED
TO DISCONTINUE FRENCH,

YOU'LL FIND SOME NEW
TEXTBOOKS ON YOUR DESK.

WILLIE, WOULD YOU READ THE
TITLE OF IT TO US, PLEASE?

Willie: A...A...AGREE...

AGREE-CUL-TOUR.
AGREECULTOUR.

THE PROPER
PRONUNCIATION
IS AGRICULTURE.

DO YOU KNOW
WHAT IT MEANS?

Willie: I THINK I'VE
HEARD IT SOMEWHERE.

Laura:
HILDY?

ISN'T THAT,
LIKE, FARMING?

EXACTLY!
WE'RE GOING TO
STUDY FARMING.

JED?

MY PA TAUGHT ME
ALL ABOUT THAT
ON THE FARM.

Laura: OH, I'M SURE
YOU KNOW A GREAT DEAL.

BUT AGRICULTURE
IS A SCIENCE.

MORE AND MORE IS
LEARNED ABOUT IT
EVERY DAY.

NOW, IN THIS BOOK, WE'RE
GOING TO LEARN ABOUT ALL
THE NEW DISCOVERIES,

SUCH AS CROP ROTATION.

OUCH!

WILLIE...

IT WASN'T MY FAULT,
MRS. WILDER.
IT WAS...

WILLIE.

HONEST,
YOU'VE GOT
TO BELIEVE ME.

Laura:
WILLIE, WOULD YOU JUST LET
ME SAY SOMETHING, PLEASE?

NOW, I DO BELIEVE YOU.

YOU DO?

RALPH, WOULD YOU PLEASE
STAND IN THE CORNER?

ME? WHAT
DID I DO?

YOU WERE PULLING
WILLIE'S HAIR.

WE DON'T DO THAT HERE.

I WASN'T,
I...

Laura: RALPH,
HAVE YOU EVER HEARD
OF PERIPHERAL VISION?

NO.

WELL, I HAVE IT.
IT MEANS THAT I CAN SEE
OUT OF THE CORNER OF MY EYE.

AND I SAW YOU
PULL WILLIE'S HAIR.

NOW, YOU WANT TO SIT
THERE AND ARGUE ABOUT IT,

OR DO YOU WANT TO
STAND IN THE CORNER
AND GET IT OVER WITH?

[LAUGHTER]

Boy: STAND IN THE CORNER.

Girl: STAND IN THE CORNER.

NOW, THE SOIL CONTAINS
CERTAIN CHEMICALS,

AS DOES THE HUMAN BODY.

AND CERTAIN CROPS TAKE
AWAY THESE CHEMICALS
FROM THE SOIL.

Laura:
SO IT'S NECESSARY FOR
US TO FIND NEW WAYS

OF REPLACING THE CHEMICALS SO
THAT WE CAN GROW HEALTHY CROPS.

NOW, IF YOU'LL OPEN
YOUR BOOKS TO CHAPTER ONE,

YOU'LL LEARN ALL
ABOUT CROP ROTATION...