Little House on the Prairie (1974–1983): Season 6, Episode 11 - Author! Author! - full transcript

During a trip to Walnut Grove, Caroline's mother passes away. Her father is very grief-stricken, until son-in-law Charles - impressed with his stories about growing up in the Little House ...

Laura: IT'S PA!

MA, PA'S HOME!

HI, PA!

Charles: HEY, WAIT
TILL YOU SEE WHAT I GOT.

THE NEW PLOW.

OH, NEVER MIND
THE NEW PLOW.

I'LL SHOW YOU WHAT I GOT--
A TELEGRAM FOR YOUR MA.

-FOR ME?
-MM-HMM.

WELL, OPEN
IT, MA.

OH, I DON'T
BELIEVE IT!

WHAT IS IT?



MA AND PA ARE COMING
FROM WISCONSIN.

THEY WANT TO SEE THEIR
FIRST GREAT-GRANDCHILD.

HOW'S THAT
FOR NEWS, HUH?

OH, CHARLES!

OH, I GOT TO GO
TELL MARY AND ADAM.

WHAT ABOUT
THE LAUNDRY?

IT GOES
IN THE BASKET,

AND DON'T
LET ANY OF IT
FALL IN THE DIRT.

OH,

WILL HE EVER
STOP GROWING?

I'M REALLY THINKING
OF CONSIDERING

THE NAMES
TITAN OR GOLIATH.

OR BOTH.
UNCLE THEODORE
HAD TWINS, YOU KNOW.

TWINS?



YEAH. I EVEN HEARD
OF AN AUNT

ON MY MOTHER'S SIDE
HAD TRIPLETS.

ARE YOU SURE?

NO. I GUESS SHE
COULD HAVE MISCOUNTED.

[SIGHS]
YOU'RE TEASING ME.

Laura: MARY! ADAM!

LAURA,
WHAT'S WRONG?

OH, NOT A THING.

GUESS WHO'S COMING
TO VISIT.

THE STORK.

NO. THAT'S
THE RIGHT REASON,
BUT THE WRONG NAME.

GRANDPA AND GRANDMA
HOLBROOK.

REALLY?

OH, ADAM,
WE HAVEN'T SEEN THEM
SINCE WE LEFT THE BIG WOODS.

AND WE WERE JUST BABIES,
THEN, OURSELVES,

AND NOW THEY'RE COMING
TO SEE YOUR BABY.

WHEN ARE
THEY COMING?

THEY'LL BE HERE
THURSDAY.

OH, ADAM,
YOU'LL LOVE THEM.

I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE

THEY'RE GOING TO BE HERE
TO SEE OUR BABY.

BABIES, REMEMBER?

MANY, MANY BABIES.

MANY BABIES?

DON'T WORRY.
HE'S JUST JOKING...

I HOPE.

IT'S SO QUIET.

MM-HMM.

I CAN'T BELIEVE
SHE'LL BE HERE
TOMORROW.

YOU'RE SAYING
YOUR MOTHER
IS NOISY?

[CHUCKLES]

SHE NEVER WAS
ONE TO TOLERATE
IDLENESS.

AH, EVEN IN CHURCH,
SHE'D BE TAPPING HER FEET
TO THE MUSIC.

WELL, SHE'S GOING
TO KEEP YOU HOPPING,
THAT'S FOR SURE.

OH, I KNOW.

I CAN'T WAIT.

WE'VE GOT SO MUCH
TO TALK ABOUT.

AND FATHER...

DEAR, SWEET PA.

I DON'T KNOW HOW
YOUR DEAR, SWEET PA
KEEPS UP WITH HER.

HE DOESN'T TRY TO.

HE JUST SITS BACK
AND ENJOYS HER.

I'VE NEVER SEEN TWO
PEOPLE MORE IN LOVE.

WELL, WAIT A MINUTE.
I HAVE.

I'LL MAKE
A WALNUT CAKE.

MOTHER ALWAYS LOVED
MY WALNUT CAKE.

THAT'S REALLY
VERY ROMANTIC.

I GIVE YOU A KISS
AND YOU TALK ABOUT
A WALNUT CAKE.

OH, CHARLES.

THAT'S ALL RIGHT,
THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

CHARLES,
COME ON.

MMM.

MMM.

HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT
I'M THINKING ABOUT?

MMM.

TELL ME.

POT ROAST.

-OH, YOU!
-HA HA!

EXCUSE ME. I WONDER
IF YOU COULD HELP ME.

I'M LOOKING FOR
A MR. AND MRS. HOLBROOK

THAT ARE SUPPOSED
TO BE ON THIS TRAIN.

ARE YOU A RELATIVE?

YEAH.

I'M SORRY. UH...

MRS. HOLBROOK
DIED EN ROUTE.

Man:
WE, UH, PUT
MR. HOLBROOK

IN A PRIVATE
COMPARTMENT
IN THE LAST CAR.

I'M SORRY.

WELL, WHAT DO
YOU WANT DONE
WITH THE BODY?

IN MY WAGON.
IT'S AROUND
THE CORNER.

PA!

OH, PA!

OH, I'M SO GLAD
TO SEE YOU.

MA?

MA?

MA--

OH, MAMA!

[GASPS]
OH, NO!

OH, NO, NO!

[SOBBING]

EARTH TO EARTH,

ASHES TO ASHES,
AND DUST TO DUST,

IN SURE AND
CERTAIN HOPE

OF THE RESURRECTION
INTO ETERNAL LIFE.

MR. HOLBROOK.

YEA, THOUGH I WALK
THROUGH THE VALLEY OF
THE SHADOW OF DEATH,

I WILL FEAR NO EVIL,

FOR THOU ART WITH ME.

THY ROD AND THY STAFF,
THEY COMFORT ME.

AND I WILL DWELL
IN THE HOUSE OF
THE LORD FOREVER.

-AMEN.
-AMEN.

AMEN.

Laura, narrating:
IN THE WEEKS THAT FOLLOWED,

GRANDPA STAYED
IN THE SODDY.

HE GREW MORE DEPRESSED
AND FRIGHTENED.

HE SEEMED TO BE
JUST WAITING TO DIE.

HOW'S PA?

HE SAID HE
WASN'T HUNGRY.

ALL RIGHT, I'LL
TALK TO HIM AGAIN.

NO, PLEASE, UH,

LET ME GO.

I TOLD LAURA
I WASN'T HUNGRY.

YOU DIDN'T
EAT ANY BREAKFAST
THIS MORNING, EITHER.

HMM.

PA.

PLEASE.

IF YOU KEEP THIS UP,
WE'LL LOSE YOU, TOO.

WHAT LOSS?

LIFE WILL GO ON
SAME AS IT HAS FOR
A THOUSAND YEARS.

WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?
WHY ARE YOU TALKING
LIKE THIS?

WE'RE BORN,
WE LIVE, WE DIE.

AND THEN
IT'S JUST A MEMORY.

PRETTY SOON
THAT'S FORGOTTEN.

THAT ISN'T TRUE.

NOTHING CHANGES,
CAROLINE.

I'LL LEAVE NO MARK,
NO PROOF OF MY EXISTENCE,

AND I'M
THE LAST HOLBROOK.

NOT EVEN THE
NAME CONTINUES.

FATHER, I DON'T WANT
TO HEAR YOU TALKING
LIKE THIS.

THEN DON'T LISTEN!

I TOLD YOU, CAROLINE.
PLEASE, PLEASE
LEAVE ME ALONE.

I WAS ONLY
TRYING TO HELP.

YOUR MOTHER'S GONE.

SHE WAS ALL I HAD,
AND PRETTY SOON
I'LL BE GONE, TOO.

NOTHING MATTERS.

CAROLINE, PLEASE.

GO BACK TO YOUR FAMILY.

-MA?
-MM-HMM.

CAN I RIDE INTO TOWN
WITH YOU AND PA?

DID YOU FINISH
YOUR CHORES?

YEP. ALL DONE.

WHAT ABOUT
THAT BOOK?

WHAT BOOK?

IT'S A
SLEEPING POTION.

[GIGGLES]

CAN'T READ
"TOM SAWYER"
ALL YOUR LIFE.

WHY NOT?

BECAUSE IT'S A SCHOOL
ASSIGNMENT AND YOU'LL
HAVE TO FINISH IT.

OH, MA.

OH, NO.

NOW, I READ
THE SAME BOOK WHEN
I WAS IN SCHOOL.

MAYBE YOU COULD TELL ME
THE STORY SO I WOULDN'T
HAVE TO FINISH IT.

ALBERT,

GO READ THE BOOK.

YES, MA'AM.

DID HE EAT
ANY BREAKFAST?

NONE TO SPEAK OF.

HE DOESN'T WANT
TO COME WITH US.

IT'S BEEN
ALMOST 3 WEEKS.

HE'S HARDLY
COME OUT OF THERE.

IT TAKES
A LITTLE TIME.

-GRANDPA?
-YEAH.

I HATE TO BOTHER YOU,
BUT I NEED SOME HELP,

AND YOU'RE THE ONLY
ONE LEFT TO ASK.

I DON'T SEE
WHAT I CAN DO,

BUT YOU'RE FREE TO
MAKE YOUR REQUEST.

HAVE YOU EVER READ
"SILAS MARNER"?

NO, CAN'T SAY
I EVER DID.

GUESS
YOU GOT LUCKY.

THEY MUST HAVE
WRITTEN IT JUST TO MAKE
SCHOOL KIDS MISERABLE.

SURE WISH I COULD HAVE
GONE TO SCHOOL WHEN YOU DID.

OH, NOW,
WE HAD OUR SHARE
OF DULL READING.

TIMES
WERE DIFFERENT,

BUT THE EFFECT
WAS THE SAME.

DID YOU EVER
GET THROUGH THEM?

WELL--NOW, MAYBE I
SHOULDN'T TELL YOU THIS.

OH, PLEASE, GRANDPA.
YOU CAN TRUST ME.

WE HAD A BOY
IN OUR CLASS

NAMED CORNELIUS T.
SHERWOOD.

CORNELIUS?

AS I RECALL,
HE READ ALL OF
"PLATO'S REPUBLIC"

IN LESS THAN 3 DAYS.

SO, WHENEVER WE
GOT ASSIGNED A BOOK
LIKE "SILAS MARNER,"

WE'D PITCH IN
A PENNY APIECE,

AND CORNIE WOULD
READ THE BOOK WHILE
WE WENT FISHING,

AND HE'D RECITE
THE STORY TO US,

AND WE'D SHOW UP
IN CLASS WITH SMILES
ON OUR FACES

AND AN UNOPENED BOOK
IN OUR HANDS.

WHAT A GREAT IDEA.

NOW, DON'T YOU GO
GETTING ANY NOTIONS
OF YOUR OWN, YOUNG MAN.

OH, NO POINT.

WE HAVEN'T GOT
A CORNELIUS T. SHERWOOD
IN OUR CLASS.

HA HA!

IF I HAD
THE BRAINS,

I'D GO INTO BUSINESS
FOR MYSELF AND GET RICH.

OH, CORNIE
NEVER GOT RICH.

HE HAD BRAINS, BUT
HE HAD A WEAKNESS.

-FOR WHAT?
-GIRLS.

HE SPENT ALL HIS MONEY
ON CANDY AND FLOWERS.

THERE WAS ONE GIRL
IN PARTICULAR--

A CUTE LITTLE REDHEAD.

SAMANTHA WAS HER NAME.

WAIT A MINUTE, HERE.
I'M TALKING A BLUE STREAK,

AND YOU'VE
GOT WORK TO DO.

OH, I CAN FINISH
THAT DUMB OLD BOOK ANYTIME.

I PROMISE.

GO ON ABOUT CORNIE
AND HIS GIRLFRIEND.

SAMANTHA?

-SAMANTHA.
-YEAH.

WELL, SAMANTHA COULD
WRAP CORNIE AROUND
HER LITTLE FINGER

WITH A WINK
AND A SMILE.

SAMANTHA,
AS I TOLD YOU,
WAS A REDHEAD.

SHE WAS KIND
OF BEAUTIFUL.

WILLOWY,
I SUPPOSE, WOULD BE
THE RIGHT WORD.

HI, MA.
HI, PA.

Caroline: HI. HELP ME WITH
THE PACKAGES, WILL YOU, DEAR?

SURE.

IS YOUR BROTHER
READING HIS BOOK?

NO, MA'AM.

CHARLES.

I'LL TALK TO HIM
RIGHT NOW.

Laura: HE'S NOT
IN THE HOUSE.

OH, IF HE'S
GONE FISHING--

OH, NO,
HE HASN'T.

HE WENT
FOR A WALK
WITH GRANDPA.

WHAT? WITH GRANDPA?

YEP. HE WAS
TELLING ALBERT
ALL KINDS OF STORIES

ABOUT WHEN
YOU WERE LITTLE.

OH, YEAH. HE TOLD ME
TO TELL YOU

TO SET A PLACE
FOR HIM AT THE TABLE
TONIGHT.

I TOLD YOU
HE'D BE FINE.

HE'LL BE FINE.

HEARD YOU TELLING
THEM ABOUT THE TIME

THAT MARCIE DAYTON
AND I WENT PICKING
BLACKBERRIES.

I REMEMBER THAT.
I WAS 7 YEARS OLD.

-6.
-7.

6, WITH ONE
FRONT TOOTH MISSING.

I REMEMBER
EVERY DETAIL.

[LAUGHTER]

INCLUDING THE FACT
THAT SHE GOT
ENOUGH BLACKBERRIES

FOR 6 JARS
OF PRESERVES,

WHILE I HAD
BARELY ENOUGH
FOR A SINGLE PIE?

WELL, YOU PRETENDED
SHE FOUND ALL
THE BEST BUSHES.

DIDN'T SAY A WORD.

YOU COULDN'T
FOOL YOUR PA.

I KNEW YOU'D EATEN
MORE THAN YOU PICKED.

AND YOU
NEVER LET ON.

I DIDN'T HAVE TO.

YOUR PURPLE
TONGUE DID.

[LAUGHTER]

THAT'S
FUNNY.

YOU KNOW,
I THINK I'M GOING
TO WRITE THAT DOWN.

WELL, YOU BETTER GET
SOME MORE PAPER, THEN.

YOUR GRANDPA'S
GOT A WHOLE LIFETIME
OF STORIES IN HIS HEAD.

WELL, THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULD
DO THE WRITING, GRANDPA.

OH, HO HO HO!

Charles: AH, DON'T
BE SO QUICK TO LAUGH.

I BET YOU HAVE MORE
THAN ENOUGH STORIES
TO FILL A BOOK.

HEY, THAT'S
A GREAT IDEA!

IT'S GOT TO BE
BETTER THAN
"SILAS MARNER."

[LAUGHTER]

SOMETHING TO READ
TO YOUR GRANDCHILDREN.

AND YOUR
GREAT-GRANDCHILDREN.

Holbrook: HMM. YOU KIND
OF LIKE THAT, HUH?

A REMEMBRANCE BOOK.

OH, GRANDPA,
WRITE IT, PLEASE!

OH, A REMEMBRANCE BOOK.

YES, I THINK
I MIGHT DO THAT.

YES, INDEED.
I THINK I MIGHT
JUST DO THAT,

BUT RIGHT NOW,
I'M HUNGRY!

I'M STARVING.
LET'S EAT.

WELL, GOOD.

OH, LET'S EAT.
[CHUCKLES]

-LOOKS GOOD.
-OH, HO HO!

HERE'S YOUR
CHAIR, GRACE.

HERE WE GO.

THERE WE GO, GRACE.
THAT'S RIGHT.

HERE, GRANDPA.
WANT A SANDWICH?

AH, THANK
YOU, LAURA.

LOOKS GOOD.

HA HA!

YOU KIND OF
LIKE THAT, HUH?

IT'S WONDERFUL.

IT ALL HAPPENED
JUST THAT WAY.

REALLY DID.

HA HA!

HA HA!

AH, BESSIE.

OH, HOW I REMEMBER
THAT COW.

SHE AND PA
NEVER DID GET ALONG.

HERE. READ THIS PART.

RIGHT HERE?

MM-HMM.

[BOTH LAUGH]

THIS IS GOOD.

OF COURSE IT IS.

NO, I MEAN,
THIS IS REALLY GOOD.

YOU KNOW,
I BET IF WE GOT THIS
TO THE RIGHT PEOPLE,

THEY'D JUST SNAP
IT UP LIKE THAT
TO PUBLISH IT.

YOU MEAN A REAL BOOK
WITH PRINTED PAGES?

SURE. WHY NOT?
WE'RE ENJOYING IT.

I THINK A LOT
OF PEOPLE WOULD.

YOU KNOW, I GOT A MIND
TO JUST TAKE THIS
TO THE PRINTER'S,

HAVE A COPY MADE,
AND SEND IT OFF.

OH, CHARLES,
THAT'S EXCITING.

LET'S NOT
TELL PAPA, THOUGH.

IF IT WORKS OUT,
IT WILL BE A SURPRISE.

IF NOT, HE WON'T
BE DISAPPOINTED.

ALL RIGHT, CHARLES?

CHARLES?

ALL RIGHT?

YEAH, FINE, YEAH.

WHO THE HECK IS
HERMAN OTIS?

WHO?

"WHO?"
WHAT ARE YOU,
AN OWL?

HERMAN OTIS,
IT SAYS RIGHT HERE.

I CAUGHT HERMAN OTIS
KISSING CAROLINE--

LET ME SEE THAT.

CHARLES, I WAS
10 YEARS OLD.

IT DOESN'T SAY
HERE IN THE BOOK

YOU WERE 10 YEARS OLD.

WELL, I THINK
I CAN REMEMBER
HOW OLD I WAS.

OH, WHY?
COULDN'T YOU
FORGET THAT NIGHT?

OH, CHARLES!

HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU
WERE 10 YEARS OLD?

YOU DIDN'T EVEN
REMEMBER HOW OLD
YOU WERE

WHEN YOU WERE
PICKING BERRIES

WITH, WHAT'S HER
FACE, THAT GIRL.

HA HA!

CHARLES, I DON'T
THINK THERE'S ANY
NEED TO BE JEALOUS

OF SOMETHING THAT
HAPPENED WHEN I WAS 10.

I DIDN'T SAY THAT
I WAS JEALOUS.
I WAS ASKING A QUESTION.

MM-HMM.

I'LL TAKE IT
OFF TOMORROW

AND HAVE A COPY
MADE SOON.

GOOD.

I'M TIRED,
I WANT TO SLEEP.

SURE I'D LIKE TO KNOW
WHY A 10-YEAR-OLD GIRL

IS KISSING A FELLOW
IN THE FIRST PLACE,
I'LL TELL YOU THAT.

PA!

OH!

I'M SO EXCITED.

I RAN ALMOST
THE WHOLE WAY.

Albert: WHAT'S ALL
THE EXCITEMENT DOWN HERE?

Charles: THIS SHOULD HAVE
BEEN ADDRESSED TO YOU, PA.

WHY WOULD
ANYONE WANT TO
WRITE ME A LETTER?

WELL, WHY DON'T
YOU READ IT
AND FIND OUT?

WH--WHAT
IS THIS?

CAROLINE AND I
SENT YOUR BOOK
TO A PUBLISHER.

THAT'S THE ANSWER.

"WE RECOGNIZE
THE QUALITY AND
EXCEPTIONAL TALENT

"IN THIS
DEMONSTRATION
OF YOUR AUTHORSHIP

"AND WOULD BE
PROFOUNDLY HONORED

TO ACCEPT
YOUR MANUSCRIPT
FOR PUBLICATION."

HUH.

"PROCEDURAL DETAILS AND
CONTRACTS TO FOLLOW IN
FURTHER CORRESPONDENCE."

THEY WANT MY BOOK.

THEY WANT
TO PUBLISH MY BOOK.

OH, PAPA!

PAPA!

I'M SORRY.

I'M JUST SO HAPPY.
I'M SO PROUD.

I'LL BE REMEMBERED.

I'M AN AUTHOR.

I'M AN AUTHOR!

I'M AN AUTHOR!

[PLAYING LIVELY TUNE]

[LAUGHTER]

Charles: WHOO!

WHOO!

[LAUGHTER]

WHOO!

[SIGHS]

ADAM?

ADAM.

HMM?

LET'S
HAVE A PICNIC.

OKAY. SATURDAY.

NO, NO.
RIGHT NOW,

RIGHT HERE,
JUST THE TWO OF US.

I MUST BE DREAMING.

I THOUGHT I HEARD YOU
ASK TO HAVE A PICNIC

RIGHT NOW IN THE
MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT.

NO, YOU WEREN'T
DREAMING, I DID.

MARY, THERE IS
A TIME FOR PICNICS

AND A TIME FOR JOKING,

AND NEITHER ONE
IS THIS LATE AT NIGHT.

BUT, ADAM,
I'M STARVING.

THERE'S COLD
CHICKEN DOWNSTAIRS

THAT'S JUST
CALLING ME.

WELL, YOU CAN HAVE
IT FOR BREAKFAST IN
A COUPLE OF HOURS.

OH, BUT, ADAM,
MY STOMACH'S
GROWLING SO LOUD,

I CAN'T GO TO SLEEP.

PLEASE.

PLEASE.

[SIGHS]

I MUST BE CRAZY.

COLD CHICKEN IN THE
MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT.

SHOULD I SERVE
FORMAL STYLE OR
SHOULD WE JUST DIG IN?

MARY?

HEY, MARY.

MARY, WHOSE IDEA
WAS THIS, ANYWAY?

OH, HERE'S ONE.

THAT'S IT.
THAT'S WHAT I'VE
BEEN WAITING FOR.

MR. HOLBROOK'S
CONTRACTS.

THE WHOLE
TOWN'S BUZZING

KNOWING THERE'S AN
AUTHOR RIGHT HERE,

AND MRS. OLESON
IS SO JEALOUS,
SHE COULD SPIT.

NOT BAD
NEWS, I HOPE.

NO, NO.
I DON'T
THINK SO.

I'M JUST NOT USED
TO READING THESE FANCY
CONTRACTS, THAT'S ALL.

OH, GOOD.

THANK YOU,
MRS. FOSTER.

GOOD DAY, CHARLES.

IT'S ALL RIGHT,
I JUST DON'T
UNDERSTAND IT.

IT SAYS RIGHT HERE
THEY WANT US TO PAY THEM
$32 TO PUBLISH THE BOOK.

I ALWAYS THOUGHT
THE IDEA WAS THAT
THEY WOULD PAY US.

I WISH YOU'D COME TO
ME BEFORE YOU SENT IT.

I JUST DIDN'T SEE
ANY HARM IN IT.

WELL, THERE ISN'T
IF YOU KNOW WHO
YOU'RE DEALING WITH.

YOU SEE, COMPANIES
LIKE THIS ONE PROFIT

BY APPEALING
TO HOPEFUL AUTHORS.

Eliza: THEY WILL PUBLISH
YOUR FATHER-IN-LAW'S BOOK.

YEAH...

FOR $32.

I'M AFRAID SO.

THEY PROBABLY NEVER EVEN
READ THE MANUSCRIPT.

WELL, AT LEAST
YOU'RE NOT OBLIGATED
IN ANY WAY.

I JUST WISH IT
WAS THAT EASY.

THANK YOU
VERY MUCH, ELIZA.

[CRICKETS CHIRPING]

ME AND MY BIG IDEAS.

WELL, YOU
BELIEVED IN HIM.

HE IS A GOOD WRITER.

I JUST THINK THE
REASON WE THOUGHT
IT WAS ALL SO IMPORTANT

WAS BECAUSE THE STORIES
MEANT SO MUCH TO US.

Caroline: WELL,
WHAT'S WRONG
WITH THAT?

Charles: NOTHING,
BUT HOW MUCH MEANING
ARE THEY GOING TO HAVE

FOR A STOREKEEPER
IN WYOMING WHO'S GOT
A FAMILY OF HIS OWN

AND CHILDREN OF HIS OWN
AND STORIES OF HIS OWN?

I SUPPOSE
YOU'RE RIGHT.

[SIGHS]

IF ONLY WE HADN'T
SAID ANYTHING.

IF ONLY I HADN'T
SAID ANYTHING.

I'M GOING TO
HAVE TO TELL HIM.

IT MIGHT...

COME BETTER
FROM HIS DAUGHTER.

NO. THAT WOULDN'T
BE FAIR TO YOU.

THIS WAS MY IDEA.

I'LL TELL HIM
IN THE MORNING.

I'M GOING TO
GO FOR A WALK.

[BIRDS CHIRPING]

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

COME IN.

GOOD MORNING,
CHARLES.

BEAUTIFUL MORNING,
ISN'T IT?

IS BREAKFAST READY?

YEAH, IT WILL BE
IN A FEW MINUTES.

I'VE BEEN UP
FOR HOURS.
COULDN'T SLEEP.

I GOT UP EARLY
TO WRITE A LETTER
TO WENDELL

ABOUT MY NEW BOOK.

NEXT THING YOU KNOW,

I WAS WRITING LETTERS
TO HALF THE PEOPLE
IN BIG WOODS.

PROMISED THEM
ALL A COPY.

OH, I KNOW IT
SEEMS A LITTLE BIT
LIKE SHOWING OFF,

BUT AT MY AGE, A MAN
DOESN'T USUALLY HAVE TOO
MUCH TO SHOW OFF ABOUT.

SOMETHING ON YOUR
MIND YOU WANTED TO TALK
ABOUT THERE, CHARLES?

NO, NO. I JUST
WANTED YOU TO KNOW

BREAKFAST WILL BE
READY IN A FEW MINUTES.

I'LL BE RIGHT DOWN.

YOU KNOW, I THINK
I MIGHT WALK INTO
TOWN AFTER BREAKFAST,

SEE IF THOSE
CONTRACTS HAVE
COME IN.

WELL, LOOK, I HAVE
TO PICK UP SOME SUPPLIES
AT THE OLESONS',

I'D BE HAPPY
TO STOP BY AND CHECK
WITH MRS. FOSTER FOR YOU.

I'D APPRECIATE
THAT. UH, CHARLES?

SINCE YOU'RE GOING TO
THE POST OFFICE ANYWAY,

MAYBE YOU COULD DROP
THOSE LETTERS FOR ME.

YEAH. NO--
NO PROBLEM
AT ALL.

AND, CHARLES...

I WANT TO THANK YOU

FOR ALL YOU'VE
DONE FOR ME.

IF IT WEREN'T FOR YOU,
I WOULDN'T BE SENDING
THOSE LETTERS.

I'LL SEE YOU
AT BREAKFAST.

BE RIGHT OUT.

YOUR FATHER GAVE ME
A WHOLE BUNCH OF LETTERS

TO MAIL BACK
TO HIS FRIENDS.

YOU, UH...
DIDN'T TELL
HIM, DID YOU?

I COULDN'T.

CAROLINE,
HE'S SO HAPPY,

I JUST COULDN'T
DISAPPOINT HIM AGAIN.

WELL, WHAT ARE
WE GOING TO DO?

WE JUST HAVE TO
RAISE THE MONEY.

$32?

I HAVE THE PLOW.
IT'S BRAND-NEW,
NEVER BEEN USED.

IT'S WORTH ABOUT $25.
WE'LL JUST HAVE
TO RAISE THE REST.

[SIGHS]

I COULDN'T
TELL HIM.

WHOA.

THIS SHOULDN'T
TAKE TOO LONG.

CAN WE WALK
AROUND SOME?

ALL RIGHT,
BUT DON'T WANDER OFF.

OKAY.
LET'S GO.

I DON'T WANT TO.

COME ON, LAURA.

OKAY.

YOU'RE UP TO
SOMETHING, AREN'T YOU?

WE'VE GOT TO RAISE
SOME MONEY TO HELP PA.

AND I SUPPOSE YOU KNOW
JUST HOW TO DO THAT.

FOLLOW ME.

BUT I'M TELLING YOU,
THE PLOW IS BRAND-NEW.

IT'S NEVER BEEN USED.

IF YOU JUST COME OUTSIDE
AND TAKE A LOOK AT IT--

LOOK, MISTER,
I TOLD YOU--

IF IT'S USED,
IT'S USED.

IT'S SECONDHAND,
AND I'LL ONLY
OFFER YOU $12.50.

THAT'S IT.
NOW EXCUSE ME.

COME ON. $12.50
IS JUST HALF-PRICE.

THAT'S MY
BEST OFFER.

WELL, THIS ISN'T
THE ONLY HARDWARE STORE
IN TOWN, YOU KNOW.

SUIT YOURSELF.

WE CLOSE AT 6:00 IF
YOU CHANGE YOUR MIND.

THANKS.

LADY--LADY...

COULD YOU JUST--
JUST SPARE A
PENNY OR TWO?

WHERE IS
YOUR HOME, CHILD?

IT WAS THE FIRE,
MA'AM.

Albert: TOOK
EVERYTHING, IT DID.

AND YOUR PARENTS?

TOOK THEM, TOO.

PLEASE, MA'AM.
WE'RE AWFUL HUNGRY.

ARE YOU ALL
RIGHT, DEAR?

SHE CAN'T
HEAR YOU.

SHE'S DEAF?

EVER SINCE
THE FIRE.

OH, HOW TERRIBLE!

POSITIVELY TRAGIC!

IF THERE'S ANYTHING
ELSE I CAN DO--

OH, BLESS YOU,
MA'AM.

YOU'VE DONE
MORE THAN ENOUGH.

BLESS YOU.

OH.

HOLD STILL,
YOU DUMB BIRD.

MAYBE HE'S
NOT DEAD YET.

UH, MORNING.

Nels:
GOOD MORNING,
CAROLINE.

WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE?

YOU ONLY
WORK WEEKENDS.

UH, WELL,
I WAS HOPING

THAT I MIGHT, UH,
WORK EVERY DAY
FOR A WHILE.

WELL, THAT WOULD
BE WONDERFUL.

I DON'T KNOW,
FATHER.

I HATE TO DISAPPOINT
MY REGULAR CUSTOMERS.

DISAPPOINT THEM?

I SET A VERY HIGH
CULINARY STANDARD

HERE DURING THE WEEK.

MY CUISINE HAS MADE
A NAME FOR ITSELF

AS FAR AWAY AS MANKATO.

YES, IT'S A NAME
I CAN'T REPEAT

IN FRONT
OF MRS. INGALLS.

MY CUSTOMERS
SWEAR BY MY COOKING.

THAT'S WHAT
I JUST SAID.

WELL, WHEN
CAN YOU START?

UH, AS SOON
AS POSSIBLE.

WELL, THERE'S NO TIME
LIKE THE PRESENT.

[CHUCKLES]

WELL, I
EXPECTED
YOU SOONER.

TOWN AIN'T THAT BIG.

OH, KEPT IT
REAL NICE.

I'LL SAY THAT
FOR YOU.

WHAT'S THERE
TO KEEP UP?

I TOLD YOU I
NEVER EVEN USED IT.

WELL, I CAN
SEE THAT.

TELL YOU
WHAT, UH...

I FEEL REAL
GENEROUS TODAY.

ARE YOU GOING TO
RAISE THE PRICE?

I'LL GIVE YOU
AN EVEN 13.

22, 23, 24,
25, 26, 27, 28,

29 DOLLARS
AND 59, 60...

$29.68.

WE MADE IT.

WELL, NOT UNLESS
CIPHERING'S CHANGED
AN AWFUL LOT

SINCE I WENT
TO SCHOOL.

LAURA'S RIGHT, PA.

SHOULD BE $2.88.

WHERE'D YOU
GET THAT MONEY?

WHERE DID WE
GET THE MONEY?

YEAH. WHERE
DID YOU GET
THE MONEY?

UH...PEOPLE.

Caroline:
WHAT PEOPLE?

PEOPLE IN
MANKATO.

THEY JUST SEEMED
TO WANT TO GIVE IT TO US.

YEAH. IT'S KIND
OF LIKE A MIRACLE,
ISN'T IT, PA?

I GUESS IT
ISN'T UP TO US

TO QUESTION THE WAYS
OF THE LORD, IS IT?

I SHOULD SAY NOT.

ESPECIALLY WHEN
THE MIRACLE PUTS
US 56 CENTS OVER.

I'LL ORDER THE
BOOKS TOMORROW.

HALF-PINT!
TELL YOUR GRANDFATHER
TO COME DOWN HERE.

Laura:
ARE THE BOOKS HERE?

YOU BET THEY ARE!

GRANDPA!

Laura: GRANDPA,
THE BOOKS ARE HERE!

THE BOOKS ARE
HERE, GRANDPA!

EH?

COME ON!
THE BOOKS ARE HERE!

AH.

Caroline:
YOU GOT THEM?

YOU BET I GOT THEM.
LOOK AT THEM ALL.

Albert: WOW!

Caroline: OH,
HURRY, CHARLES!

CAROLINE,
I'M HURRYING,
I'M HURRYING.

THERE WE GO.

Holbrook: NEVER
THOUGHT I'D SEE THE DAY.

OH.

LOOK, PA.

"MY BOOK OF MEMORIES,
BY FREDERICK HOLBROOK."

HA HA!

Charles:
CONGRATULATIONS,
MR. AUTHOR.

WELL, THANK YOU.
THANK YOU, ALL.

I WONDER IF
ANYBODY WILL BUY IT.

WELL, SURE, THEY'RE
GOING TO BUY IT.

ALBERT AND I ARE
GOING TO BRING SOME
INTO THE MERCANTILE.

-YEAH?
-PA, MAYBE YOU SHOULD
AUTOGRAPH THEM.

AUTOGRAPH THEM?

GOLLY,
I THINK I WILL!

I'LL GO
GET MY PEN!

IF THEY SELL
VERY WELL,

WE COULD HAVE
A SECOND PRINTING.

A SECOND PRINTING?

WHAT WILL
WE SELL NOW?

[GIGGLES]

UH, NO.

NO, NO, NO,
NO, NO, NO.

I'M AFRAID NOT,
MR. INGALLS.

MRS. OLESON, YOU'RE
THE ONLY STORE IN TOWN

THAT SELLS BOOKS.

I CAN'T STOCK THESE
AT THE FEED AND SEED.

I SAID, "I'M SORRY."

Mrs. Oleson:
I HAVE TO CONSIDER

THE KIND OF MERCHANDISE
THAT I STOCK,

AND, HA, I DON'T THINK
THIS IS REALLY GOING
TO BE VERY INTERESTING

FOR OUR COMMUNITY.

HARRIET, TWO OR 3 COPIES,
JUST TO SEE HOW THEY GO.

I SAID, "NO."

I'M SORRY, BUT
I REALLY HAVE VERY
LIMITED SHELF SPACE.

EXCUSE ME. UM, IS
THERE ANYTHING ELSE?

NO. THERE'S NOTHING
ELSE. THANK YOU.

COME ON, ALBERT.

CHARLES, I'M SORRY.
I DON'T KNOW
WHAT TO SAY.

IT'S ALL RIGHT, NELS.
I UNDERSTAND.

SHE'S JEALOUS BECAUSE
YOUR FATHER-IN-LAW
IS FAMOUS.

Albert: PA, I'LL
BE BACK IN A SECOND.

ALL RIGHT, SON.

MRS. OLESON?

YES! OH, ALBERT!

IF YOU'VE COME BACK
HERE TO TRY AGAIN,

YOU'RE JUST
WASTING YOUR
TIME, AND MINE.

NO, MA'AM. I CAME
BACK TO THANK YOU.

TO THANK ME?
FOR WHAT?

WELL, PA'S BEEN
REAL BUSY LATELY,

AND HE HASN'T ACTUALLY
READ THE BOOK HIMSELF.

I'M HOPING HE NEVER
FINDS OUT WHAT'S IN IT.

BYE.

WAIT A MINUTE.

WHAT DO
YOU MEAN?

WHAT'S IN IT?

-WELL, STUFF ABOUT MY MA.
-OH?

I CAN'T BELIEVE
THAT MY OWN GRANDFATHER

WOULD WRITE SUCH THINGS DOWN
FOR THE WHOLE WORLD TO SEE.

REALLY?

LIKE WHAT?

OH, I'M TOO ASHAMED
TO REPEAT THEM, MA'AM.

OH, ALBERT.
YOU CAN TELL ME.

AFTER ALL,
YOUR MOTHER AND I
ARE OLD FRIENDS.

THERE ISN'T
ANYTHING THAT
YOU COULD TELL ME

THAT WOULD CHANGE
MY OPINION ABOUT HER.

HMM.

WELL, THERE
WAS THIS ONE PART

WHERE MY MA WAS
IN A PUBLIC PLACE,

AND SHE...

WHAT? WHAT
DID SHE DO?

SHE DIDN'T
DO ANYTHING.

WELL.

SHE WASN'T WEARING
ANYTHING, EITHER.

[GASPS]

YOU--YOU MEAN
THAT SHE WA--

NAKED.

[GASPS]

OH, MY!

SO, YOU SEE WHY
I DIDN'T WANT FOLKS
TO BE READING THAT BOOK?

OH, YES.

YES.
HA HA!

THANKS AGAIN,
MRS. OLESON.

I KNEW I COULD
TRUST YOU.

MM-HMM.
YES.

CHARLES!

CHARLES!

CHARLES, HOW MANY
BOOKS WILL I BE
ALLOWED TO PURCHASE?

WHAT?

HOW MANY OF THESE
BOOKS CAN I HAVE?

I MEAN, I'LL TAKE
ALL OF THEM IF I CAN.

MRS. OLESON,
YOU JUST SAID--

WELL, I--I KNOW.

IT WAS JUST A MATTER
OF SHELF SPACE, CHARLES,

AND I CLEARED A SHELF.

I'LL PAY CASH
IN ADVANCE.

YOU MEAN,
FOR ALL OF THE BOOKS?

YES! ALL OF THEM!

I'LL GET THE MONEY!

YOU BRING THEM IN!
HA HA!

WHAT IN THE WORLD
DO YOU MAKE OF THAT?

I HAVEN'T THE
SLIGHTEST IDEA.

WOMEN. WHO CAN
FIGURE THEM OUT?

[YAWNS]

HARRIET, I'M SURPRISED
THAT YOU'RE TAKING
SUCH AN INTEREST

IN THE INGALLS FAMILY.

WELL, WHY NOT?

AFTER ALL,
THEY'RE OUR
NEIGHBORS.

OH! HERE IT IS!

HERE IT IS!
LISTEN!

"CAROLINE STOOD IN
FRONT OF THE CHURCH,
NAKED AS A JAYBIRD."

-CAROLINE?
-HA HA!

WELL, I--

LISTEN. "NAKED
AS A JAYBIRD.

"HER DIAPER WAS--"

HER DIAP--

HER DIAPER?

GOOD GRIEF!

OH, THAT SCRAWNY
LITTLE DEVIL!

WHO, CAROLINE?

NO! ALBERT.

HE TOLD ME
THAT CAROLINE

RAN AROUND
STARK-NAKED
IN THIS BOOK.

HA HA!

WELL, WHO CARES?
SHE WAS ONLY A BABY!

-HA HA!
-OH!

OH, SHUT UP!

AH, DEAR.

OH, AWFUL CHILD!

[CRICKETS CHIRPING]

[BREATHING HARD]

ADAM. ADAM.

WE'VE PICKED
OUT A NAME,

AND THERE'S
NOTHING TO EAT.

WHAT DO YOU
WANT THIS TIME?

DR. BAKER.

DR. BAKER. WHY?

BECAUSE I REALLY
DON'T WANT TO
HAVE THIS BABY

ALL BY MYSELF.

BABY? ARE YOU SURE?

ADAM, DON'T
ASK QUESTIONS.
YOU'RE WASTING TIME.

RIGHT.

ADAM?

NOW WHAT?

I REALLY THINK YOU
SHOULD PUT YOUR PANTS ON.

RIGHT.

CHARLES! CAROLINE!

WHOA!
CHARLES!

Caroline:
WHAT'S WRONG?

IT'S TIME. COME ON.
I'LL SEE YOU THERE.

GIDDY-UP!

-CHARLES!
-THE TEAM!

OH!

HELLO, GRANDPA.

IT'S A BOY.

Charles:
A BOY.

IT'S A BOY!

COMPANY, MARY.

Mary: MA? MA?

OH, ADAM.

[BABY WHIMPERS]

-OH, HONEY.
-MEET YOUR NEW GRANDSON.

WELL...

WHO'S THIS?

ADAM CHARLES
HOLBROOK KENDALL.

HOLBROOK?

YOU'RE HIS FAMILY,
TOO, GRANDPA.

YOU BETTER
GET A CLOSER LOOK,
GREAT-GRANDFATHER.

OH, COME HERE,
MY LITTLE ONE.

COULD I HOLD HIM
JUST FOR A SECOND?

HERE'S GRANDPA.

WHEN GRANDMA WENT,
I THOUGHT MY
LIFE WAS OVER,

BUT NOW I'M AN AUTHOR

AND A GREAT-GRANDFATHER.

YOU'VE MADE AN OLD
MAN VERY HAPPY...

ALL OF YOU.

YES.

[CHUCKLES]

[BELL RINGS]

BYE-BYE.

BYE-BYE. GIVE
GRANDPA A KISS.

WE'LL MISS YOU,
GRANDPA.

I'LL MISS
YOU, TOO.

WHENEVER YOU
THINK OF ME,

YOU JUST READ
MY BOOK, AND I
WILL BE RIGHT THERE.

Albert:
WE'LL WRITE TO YOU.

I'M COUNTING
ON YOU.

BYE, GRANDPA.

GOOD-BYE.
GOOD-BYE.

PA...

PA.

Man: ALL ABOARD!

YOU'D BETTER
GO, PA.

GOOD-BYE, DAUGHTER.

YOU HAVE
A GOOD TRIP.

I'LL MISS YOU.

[WHISTLE BLOWS]

TAKE GOOD CARE
OF MY GREAT-GRANDCHILD.

HE'S A HOLBROOK,
MY FUTURE.

YOU ALL ARE.

Laura, narrating:
TWO YEARS AFTER WE SAID
GOOD-BYE AT THE STATION,

GRANDPA HOLBROOK PASSED ON.

HIS TOMBSTONE READ SIMPLY,
"FREDERICK HOLBROOK, AUTHOR."

HE WILL ALWAYS
BE REMEMBERED.