Lip Sync Battle (2015–…): Season 1, Episode 1 - Jimmy Fallon vs. Dwayne Johnson - full transcript

Sunday morning right now on the jet.

We're getting ready to go wheels up.

I'm heading to New York
City, my home away from home,

for one reason...

the lip-sync battle of all lip-sync battles.

Jimmy Fallon, I'm coming to kick your ass,

'cause at the end of the
day, I just want to shake it.

[Powerman 5000's "20th
Century Boy" playing]

♪ Friends say it's fine,
friends say it's good ♪

♪ everybody says it's
just like rock 'n' roll ♪

♪ ohhhhhhh ♪



♪ well, it's plain to see
you were meant for me, yeah ♪

♪ and I'm your boy,
your 20th century toy ♪

[Cheers and applause]

[Feedback]

[Cheers and applause]

Teigen: Give it up for
actor, rapper, legend...

our host, LL Cool J.

Welcome to "Lip Sync Battle."

You know what it is, all right?

You've seen it on TV,
you've seen it online,

you've seen it everywhere, so
you know the game is simple.

Two stars lip-sync two songs.

The audience decides who did it best.

You clear with that? You understand?



[Cheers and applause]

Here to help me is our color commentator,

Chrissy Teigen.

♪ All they do is stare, stare, stare ♪

♪ all they do is stare, stare, stare ♪

♪ all they do is stare

[cheers and applause]

Get on up there, girl.

♪ Stare ♪

Oh, my gosh.

So, Chrissy, you got your eye on the prize.

Could you show everybody
the championship belt?

I mean, your jacket... you
matched it today. I love it!

- Ah.
- [Laughter]

Are you ready for an epic battle?

[Cheers and applause]

First up... 6 feet, 5 inches...

weighing 260 pounds...

[Audience cheers]

[Heroic music plays]

... Dwayne Johnson!

[Cheers and applause]

And his opponent... a lot shorter...

weighing a lot less...

[Laughter]

The host of "The Tonight Show"...

[Audience cheers]

... Jimmy Fallon.

[Cheers and applause]

Yeah! That's what I'm talking about, baby!

And this is a...

I need five min... I need five minutes.

I'm already winded.

[Laughter]

Thank god it's a lip-sync battle,

'cause I'm already out of breath.

He needs mouth-to-mouth, Chrissy.

Yeah, I do. I need mouth-to-mouth.

No... Chrissy, Chrissy,
I need mouth-to-mouth.

Yeah, yeah.

[Laughs]

Yeah, okay. So, stand right here.

All right. I wanted to
see you guys side-by-side

really, you know, matching up.

[Cheers and applause]

I think you guys should arm
wrestle to see who goes first.

Oh, no, no, no, no!

Teigen: Oh, my god.

No. No? Okay, then.

I'll tell you what...
then, Jimmy, you sit down.

Fallon: Okay, okay.

Dwayne, come on over here, boy.

[Cheers and applause]

So, the world wants to know...

the entire world is watching right now.

The entire world?

They want to know, what's
your first song gonna be?

Tay-Tay.

Tay-Tay?

- [Cheers and applause]
- I never heard of Tay-Tay.

I'm sorry, what'd you say?

No one's ever heard of Tay-Tay.

Well, believe me.

- You can't lip-sync a song no one's ever heard of!
- Listen, listen.

Tay-Tay?

Your ass is getting ready
to know Tay-Tay in a second.

Hold on.

[Cheers and applause]

Hold on.

Uncalled for.

Oh, no, it's not uncalled for.

That's rude!

Hold on a second.

We got a guy like this,

he's been running his mouth all week.

He's been telling the
world he's gonna beat me,

but like Tay-Tay, and like we all do,

when we hear trash talk,
we just shake it off.

[Cheers and applause]

Ladies and gentlemen...

Taylor Swift!

... here is Dwayne Johnson...

That Tay-Tay?!

That Tay-Tay!

You're talking about Swifty!

I didn't know her, you know, as Tay-Tay.

Taylor "Tay-Tay" Swift... "Shake It Off."

[Cheers and applause]

[Intro plays]

♪ I stay out too late ♪

♪ got nothin' in my brain ♪

♪ that's what people say, mm-hmm ♪

♪ that's what people say, mm-hmm ♪

♪ I go on too many dates ♪

[giggles]

♪ But I can't make 'em stay ♪

♪ at least, that's what people say ♪

♪ mm-hmm ♪

♪ that's what people say, mm-hmm ♪

♪ but I keep cruisin' ♪

♪ can't stop once I'm movin' ♪

♪ it's like I got
this music in my mind ♪

♪ sayin' "it's gonna be all right" ♪

♪ 'cause the players gonna
play, play, play, play, play ♪

♪ and the haters gonna hate,
hate, hate, hate, hate ♪

♪ baby, I'm just gonna shake,
shake, shake, shake, shake ♪

♪ shake it off, shake it off ♪

♪ heartbreakers gonna break,
break, break, break, break ♪

♪ and the fakers gonna fake,
fake, fake, fake, fake ♪

♪ baby, I'm just gonna shake,
shake, shake, shake, shake ♪

♪ shake it off, shake it off ♪

Hey, hey, hey.

Just think, while you've
been getting down and out

about the liars and the dirty,
dirty cheats of the world,

you could've been getting
down to this... sick... beat.

♪ My ex-man brought
his new girlfriend ♪

♪ she's like, "oh my god"
but I'm just gonna shake ♪

♪ and to the fella over there
with the hella good hair ♪

♪ won't you come on over, baby? ♪

♪ We can shake, shake, shake ♪

[cheers and applause]

Oh, my god.

That felt like you came from
your soul with that, like...

Deep, deep.

Like, you know, when you
were doing "I need love,"

- it was deep.
- Taylor... yeah.

You could tell that he's done
this before in his bedroom.

[Laughter]

I could tell he's done that before.

That's not the first time
he lip-synced that song.

You can just see the rock in
his car going, "Shake It Off."

You know, see that happening.

- [Laughter]
- It was almost too good.

Dwayne, go relax. Have a seat.

It was almost too good.

You know what I'm saying?

Jimmy, you're up.

[Cheers and applause]

All right.

[Sighs]

Hey, yo, Jimmy.

Yeah?

You better bring it,

- 'cause Dwayne just brought it.
- I know, I know.

That was good right
there. But you know what?

I see this pool of kids right here...

Yeah?

... and you know what happens
when you put a rock in a pool?

It sinks.

[Audience ohhs]

Right down the Dwayne! [Drain]

[Laughter]

Wow. Okay.

So, Jimmy, what's your first song?

First song's gonna be "Jump In The Line"

by Harry Belafonte.

A little salsa, get the party going.

I want to get a party, I want
to get a dance group going.

Okay. Ladies and gentlemen,
sincerely faking it,

here is Jimmy Fallon.

[Cheers and applause]

[Intro plays]

♪ Shake, shake, shake, Senora ♪

♪ shake your body line ♪

♪ shake, shake, shake, Senora ♪

♪ shake it all the tim ♪e

♪ work, work, work, Senora ♪

♪ work your body line ♪

♪ work, work, work, Senora ♪

♪ work it all the time ♪

♪ my girl's name is Senora ♪

♪ I tell you, friends, I adore her ♪

[Audience clapping rhythmically]

♪ And when she dances, oh, brother! ♪

♪ She's a hurricane in
all kinds of weather ♪

♪ jump in the line,
rock your body in time ♪

♪ okay, I believe you ♪

♪ jump in the line,
rock your body in time ♪

♪ okay, I believe you ♪

♪ jump in the line,
rock your body in time ♪

Oh!

♪ You can talk about cha-cha ♪

♪ tango, waltz, or the rumba ♪

♪ Senora's dance has more title ♪

♪ your jump in the saddle,
hold on to the bridle ♪

♪ jump in the line,
rock your body in time ♪

♪ okay, I believe you ♪

♪ jump in the line,
rock your body in time ♪

Rock your body, child! ♪

♪ Jump in the line,
rock your body in time ♪

Somebody help me!

♪ Jump in the line,
rock your body in time ♪

[Cheers and applause]

Okay, okay. Okay.

Here.

Thank you very much, Chrissy.

Thank you very...

[cheers and applause]

Don't mess with drumming action.

You guys know how to party.

They know how to party down there!

They know where the party's at!

[Cheers and applause]

All right, so, Dwayne... ?

Yeah?

- Is he still there?
- Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. Wow, wow. Okay.

Can you smell what I'm cooking?

I'm cooking some food.

[Cheers and applause]

Wow.

- Dwayne?
- Yes?

What did you feel about
Jimmy's performance?

What I felt about it?

I felt like, how we say down in the south,

two-day-old, stale
horse[Bleep] but that's okay.

[Audience ohhs]

You can't do that! You're the host!

[Laughs]

You can't laugh and clap!
You're hosting the show!

But it's funny.

I'm impartial, I'm impartial.

I don't vote, I don't vote.

But it was always supposed to be funny.

- He was amazing.
- I don't vote.

- Look, you're leaving me hanging.
- Jimmy, Jimmy.

I think Dwayne wants a
word with you in the lounge.

I love you. But I love you.

I love you, too.

Chrissy, you've seen them both.

What do you think?

I don't know if anyone has
ever uttered this before,

but Jimmy left me breas...
breath... [Sputters, laughs]

[Laughter]

Breastless!

Breastless?

Nobody has left me breastless ever.

Oh. Okay, okay.

Sorry, y'all.

No, Jimmy left me breathless.

But I wasn't looking
at... Chrissy's breath.

- Breath, yes.
- You weren't? You promise?

No, I mean, it's cold in here,

you can to see a lot of people's breath,

but I wasn't looking at her breaths at all.

It's cold outside. We understand.

- [Audience cheers]
- So, uh,

coming up, get ready
to see Jimmy go to church.

Dwayne's going back to the '70s.

Stay tuned for more "Lip Sync Battle."

♪ Shake it off ♪

♪ I'm just gonna shake,
shake, shake, shake, shake ♪

Welcome back to "Lip Sync Battle."

Now it's time for both stars
to stop talking the talk

and start walking the walk.

We're moving into round 2.

[Cheers and applause]

The lip-sync battle royale... with cheese.

[Laughter]

Jimmy had to put in some real work in this.

He put in 10,000 hours of rehearsal time.

No pain, no gain.

And now let's take a look

at how he prepared for the battle.

There's a lot of things you can do
to prepare for "Lip Sync Battle."

I mean, sometimes, just talking to people,

I just... Just put in a
little extra lip movement.

I don't know if you saw it. I
just snuck a couple in there.

You know?

I'm so good at lip-syncing,

I can even lip-sync words backwards.

I can talk backwards.

[Speaking backwards]

That is "I'm ready to
come and beat the Rock

and conquer and leave with the belt."

I don't want to embarrass him,

but if it happens, it happens, you know?

And he's just got to be a big boy

and put his big-boy pants on.

Of course, I'll never say
any of this to his face.

'Cause when I see him, I'll
be like, "Hey! Hey, Dwayne."

"How are you, man?"

You know what?

I got to get in my zone right now.

You can come with me.

This is what I have to
do to find my inner peace.

[Chanting]

[Cheers and applause]

[Madonna's "Like a Prayer" plays]

♪ Life is a mystery ♪

♪ everyone must stand alone ♪

♪ I hear you call my name ♪

♪ and it feels like home ♪

[cheers and applause]

♪ When you call my name,
it's like a little prayer ♪

♪ I'm down on my knees ♪

♪ I want to take you there ♪

♪ in the midnight hour,
I can feel your power ♪

♪ just like a prayer, you
know I'll take you there ♪

♪ like a child ♪

♪ you whisper softly to me ♪

♪ you're in control ♪

♪ just like a child ♪

♪ now I'm dancing ♪

♪ it's like a dream ♪

♪ no end and no beginning ♪

♪ you're here with me ♪

♪ it's like a dream ♪

♪ let the choir sing ♪

♪ when you call my name,
it's like a little prayer ♪

♪ I'm down on my knees ♪

♪ I want to take you there ♪

♪ in the midnight hour,
I can feel your power ♪

♪ just like a prayer, you
know I'll take you there ♪

♪ when you call my name,
it's like a little prayer ♪

♪ I'm down on my knees ♪

♪ I want to take you there ♪

♪ in the midnight hour,
I can feel your power ♪

♪ just like a prayer, you
know I'll take you there ♪

[Cheers and applause]

This is my entourage.

[Laughter]

We go out, we go everywhere together.

[Laughter]

Jimmy, obviously you
were divinely inspired.

I appreciate that.

Yeah, I was.

I felt I had to get in there

and let people know how
much they mean to me.

You're all like a child whispering to me.

[Laughter]

Now, Dwayne, Dwayne...

Yes?

How are you still here?!

I am still here.

- You should go home.
- Still here.

I feel bad for you, 'cause...

Yeah. This is tough.

But, look, see that belt up there?

Yeah.

It's not going home with you.

[Audience ohhs]

But I have a belt that you can take home.

I had this made.

Here you go, dude.

[Laughter]

There you go, man.

[Audience awws]

Well, thank you so much.

[Cheers and applause]

How'd you like that?

But, Jimmy, what's he
gonna put that around?

[Laughs]

Wait!

Let me have that.

Next up,

my man Dwayne Johnson will
have a chance to redeem himself.

We'll be right back with
more "Lip Sync Battle."

- ♪ I want to take you there ♪
- [Cheers and applause]

♪ Yeah, everybody says it's
just like rock 'n' roll ♪

[Cheers and applause]

Welcome back to "Lip Sync Battle."

Now let's see how Dwayne prepared

for his face-off with Jimmy.

[Audience cheers]

I'm cool, just like Bruce Lee.

I've flown all the way up to New York City.

It's my home away from home.

I told you I was coming
to win the title, Jimmy,

and I'm not backing down from that,

because, at the end of the day,

there's a reason why they
call me the jabroni-beating,

pie-eating, trail-blazing, eyebrow-raising.

I told you I'm gonna come
in, I'm gonna take the title,

and that's exactly what I'm doing.

My game is on fleek. I love
saying the word "fleek."

Now, did I hire a lip-sync trainer?

That's not the point. [Laughs]

The point is, I came here to kick ass,

and that's exactly what I'm gonna do.

I'm the mother[Bleep] Rock.

I'm gonna be a bad
mother[Bleep] up there... boom...

and lip-sync at the same time
[High-pitched voice] on fleek.

[Cheers and applause]

[Bee Gees' "Stayin' Alive" plays]

Oh, my god!

♪ Well, you can tell by
the way I use my walk ♪

♪ I'm a woman's man...
no time to talk ♪

♪ music loud and women warm ♪

♪ I've been kicked
around since I was born ♪

♪ and now it's all right, it's okay ♪

♪ and you may look the other way ♪

♪ we can try to understand ♪

♪ the New York Times' effect on man ♪

♪ whether you're a brother
or whether you're a mother ♪

♪ you're stayin' alive, stayin' alive ♪

♪ feel the city breakin'
and everybody shakin' ♪

♪ and we're stayin'
alive, stayin' alive ♪

♪ ah, ha, ha, ha ♪

♪ stayin' alive, stayin' alive ♪

♪ ah, ha, ha, ha ♪

♪ stayin' aliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive ♪

[audience cheers]

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

[cheers and applause]

♪ Well, now, I get
low and I get high, ♪

♪ and if I can't get
either, I really try ♪

♪ got the wings of heaven on my shoes ♪

♪ I'm a dancin' man,
and I just can't lose ♪

♪ you know it's all right, it's okay ♪

♪ I'll live to see another day ♪

♪ we can try to understand ♪

♪ the New York Times' effect on man ♪

♪ whether you're a brother
or whether you're a mother, ♪

♪ you're stayin' alive, stayin' alive ♪

♪ feel the city breakin'
and everybody shakin' ♪

♪ and we're stayin'
alive, stayin' alive ♪

♪ ah, ha, ha, ha ♪

♪ stayin' alive, stayin' alive ♪

♪ ah, ha, ha, ha ♪

♪ stayin' aliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive ♪

♪ yeah ♪

[cheers and applause]

That's how you do it! That's how you do it!

It's too much. It's too much.

Can't stop, can't stop.

Easy, big fella.

[Laughs]

You can't stop it. You can't stop it.

It's coming.

You can't stop it.

Easy, big fella.

[Laughter]

So, yo, you...

Hold on a second. I got to do this.

Can I see this jacket really quick?

- You've known...
- What's your name?

Chris, okay, here. Here you go.

Teigen: Oh, god.

[Audience cheers]

Oh, my god.

That's pandering. That's not fair.

He went R&B smooth on me.

Oh, that was not fair. That was not fair.

Yo, now, have you had those
moves your entire life?

I mean, is that just a gift?

Well, god delivered, and I signed.

Teigen: Ohhhhhh!

[Cheers and applause]

But, by the way, I mean,
that's the way I walk every day.

[Laughter]

["Stayin' Alive" plays]

[Cheers and applause]

That's it. It's over right there.

[Laughs]

Will the rock pin his
opponent to the lip-sync mat?

Or will Jimmy pile-drive
him... unh! Unh!...

back right down for the championship belt?

We'll be right back to find out
who goes home with the title.

Unh!

♪ Stayin' alive ♪

[Bee Gees' "Stayin' Alive" plays]

Welcome back to finale of
tonight's "Lip Sync Battle"!

The moment has come.
Chrissy, the belt, please.

[Cheers and applause]

Audience, it's up to you.

Guys, it's totally up to you.

Is the winner Jimmy Fallon?

[Cheers and applause]

Or is the winner Dwayne Johnson?

[Louder cheers and applause]

And the winner, unquestionably,
without a doubt...

... the "Lip Sync Battle"
champion is Dwayne Johnson!

[Cheers and applause]

- The Rock.
- Thank you.

Thank you.

So, you, Dwayne, Dwayne, you're a champion.

You have many belts,
obviously. The world knows that.

Yes.

But you just won the "Lip Sync Battle"

championship belt. How do you feel?

10-time world champion.

[Cheers and applause]

Had that honor, right?

Many titles, many titles.

Oh, my gosh.

[Laughter]

People's champ.

Yeah, yeah.

Big movie star, yeah, yeah, yeah.

We get it.

You're a star.

We get it... you're great.

Yeah, we get it. Yeah.

[Laughter]

You're great. You're better than us.

Tongue-wrestling champion of the world.

[Audience cheering]

Hold up, hold up. Hold up, hold up.

I don't know about that one.

The bottom line is, it is an honor

to be the "Lip Sync Battle" champion.

Thank you so much!

Thank you!

[Cheers and applause]

Be sure to check out
our next lip-sync battle.

I'm LL Cool J. And from me,

Chrissy, everyone on the
"Lip Sync" crew, good night!

And remember... knock 'em out the box, L.

Knock 'em out, L.

♪ Well, you can tell by
the way I use my walk ♪

♪ I'm a woman's man...
no time to talk ♪

♪ music loud and women warm ♪

♪ I've been kicked
around since I was born ♪

♪ it's all right, and it's okay ♪

♪ and you may look the other way ♪

♪ we can try to understand ♪

♪ the New York Times' effect on man ♪

♪ whether you're a brother
or whether you're a mother ♪

♪ you're stayin' alive, stayin' alive ♪

♪ feel the city breakin'
and everybody shakin' ♪

♪ and we're stayin'
alive, stayin' alive ♪

♪ ah, ha ♪