Leave It to Beaver (1957–1963): Season 6, Episode 12 - Beaver, the Hero - full transcript

Starring...

and...

Ward, what are you doing here?

Well, isn't this where I live?

Well, I thought you were
going to Beaver's school.

Isn't he playing football today?

Uh, yeah, well, I
was, but well, actually,

it's gotten a little
embarrassing.

You see, so far I've
showed up for every game,

and the coach just hasn't
been playing Beaver very much.

Well, shouldn't you be there



to kind of encourage him anyway?

June, it's bad enough
sitting on the bench,

but when your father's there
watching you sit on the bench,

that's the worst.

Well, I think it's unfair

that Beaver doesn't
get to play more.

After all, he's one of the
best players on the team.

Spoken like a true mother.

Well, shouldn't he be playing?

Uh, from a parent's
point of view, yes.

From a coach's
point of view, no.

Ward... Now, look,
don't get me wrong.

Beaver will be a good
player one of these days.

He just needs a
little experience.



If he applies himself,
he'll do just fine.

I know he will.

He's going to
be like his father.

When you were in high school

you were a fine football
player, weren't you?

Yes, matter of fact,
I was considered

the Red Grange of Shaker Heights

by a committee of experts...

My father, my mother,
and my Aunt Emma.

Hey, Mom, Dad.

Boy, you really missed it.

Missed what?

It's the Beaver. He got to play

in the last two minutes
of the ball game,

and he scored the
winning touchdown.

Ward, now, isn't that wonderful?

Well, I'll say it is.

He was a big hero.

Oh, well, I knew that boy
had it in him all the time.

Well, what happened then?

Then Terry faded back to pass,
and Beaver ran down the field.

And he got behind the defense.

The guy tripped.

Yeah, and then Terry let it fly,

and Beaver snagged
it in the end zone.

Beaver, we're just
so proud of you.

I'm just sorry I wasn't there.

Well, gee, Dad, if you and
Mom would've been there,

I would've probably
fumbled the ball or something.

Oh, I bet this will
prove to the coach

you're the best player, Beav.

Mom, I'm not the best player.

Well, you must be.

You scored the
winning touchdown.

Beaver's not the
best player, Mom.

He knows that.

Well, then he's one
of the best players.

He'd probably be
playing all the time

if the coach didn't
have his favorites.

Uh, June, the coach can't
afford to have favorites.

Pass the rolls, will you, Wally?

Oh, sure.

He fades back. His
man's in the open.

He cocks his arm
and he... Uh, uh, uh.

Let's save that for
the playing field, huh?

Yes, sir.

That was a good
game yesterday, Beav.

Thanks a lot.

Hey, Beav, how come you
showed up at school today?

Yeah, we thought the coach
would let you have the day off.

Aw, cut it out,
Gilbert and Whitey.

Hi, Beaver.

Hi.

Beaver, you were just
terrific in the game yesterday.

Well, thanks.

Who's that?

Oh, that's Charlene,
that snooty girl in math.

Oh, yeah, her father's got

the car with the steering
wheel on the wrong side.

Last time she spoke to me,

I stepped on her
foot in a fire drill.

There he is, Donna.

Here he comes, Joyce.

- Hi, Beaver.
- Hi, Beaver.

- Hi.
- Hi, Donna.

If you want a drink,
Beaver, go ahead.

Okay, thanks.

Gee, Beaver, it was super

the way you caught
that pass yesterday.

Oh, it wasn't so much.

That's what you're
supposed to do in football.

Gee, I never noticed
how cute he is before.

Me, neither.

Good morning, Beaver.

Oh, good morning, Mr. Ingersoll.

Golly, Beav, even the
coach said hello to you.

Gosh, I bet that's
the first time in history

a coach ever said hello to a
guy inside a school building.

What's the matter, Beav?

Aren't you coming in?

I don't want to.

Come on, I'll buy you a soda.

No, my mom doesn't want me
to have sodas before supper.

She says it wrecks my dinner.

That's what my mom says, too.

That's why I'm only going
to have one. Come on.

Yeah, come on, Beav.

Hey, guys, look who's coming.

♪♪

Come on, Beaver,
sit at the table with us.

Uh, sorry, fellows, this
table's for pros only.

Denny, Gary, you
guys know Beaver.

Nice catch, Beaver.

Well, gee, Terry here is the
guy who should get all the credit.

He's the guy who threw the pass.

Yeah, but you're
the guy that nailed it.

I know, but...

Some of those other
rummies would've chocked up,

but you played it
like an All-American.

What are you going to
have, Beav? I'm buying.

No, I'll get it.

Hey, Alex.

Here you go, Beaver.

It's on the house.

For me?

Golly, thanks, Alex. How come?

We're going to call it
The Beaver Special.

Oh, that prune on top is
supposed to be a football.

You're in, Beav.

You guys seen the
evening paper yet?

Not yet.

Take a look at that.

Gee, it's a picture of you,
Beav, catching the ball.

Boy, I never saw
them put a picture

of a grammar school
game in the paper before.

Yeah, the first time they
do, it's a picture of you.

Well, you better buy a
couple dozen of these papers,

so you can autograph
the pictures for your fans.

Aw, cut it out, Terry.

You're the guy who
ought to get all the credit.

You're the best player
on our whole team.

What do you mean? You're
the guy that won the game for us.

Sure, Beav, you're the big shot.

Yeah, and this is
just the beginning.

Why, with me throwing
them and you snaring them,

we could win the
rest of our games

and cop the league trophy.

Yeah.

Sure, well, we'll be
the biggest combination

since Blanchard and Davis.

Boy, The Beaver Special.

This is like eating
a good friend.

Hey, Mom!

Mom! Hey, Mom!

- Hi, Dad.
- Hi.

Hey, Mom, look.

Look, it's a picture of Beaver.

Well, it most certainly is.

Hey, look at him
go up after that pass.

Isn't that a wonderful likeness?

Gee, Mom, you can
hardly recognize a guy

with the headgear
falling down over his face.

Well, I don't care, Wally.

After dinner I want you to
go down to the drugstore

and get some extra
copies so I can send them

to Aunt Martha and Uncle
Billy and all the relatives.

Beaver's going to want
to start a scrapbook.

- June, just a moment.
- Yes, dear?

I think it's fine to
let our relatives

know how well our
offspring are doing,

but let's not let
this get out of hand.

What do you mean?

Well, to begin with,

Beaver's entire feat
consisted of catching a football.

You'd be surprised
how many footballs

are caught by boys in
this country every day.

Well, the paper seems
to think it's important.

Well, yes, but I...

Dear, you don't think Beaver

could get swell-headed
over this, do you?

Uh, I think it's quite possible.

Oh, honey, I don't think you
have to worry about our Beaver.

Oh, no, Dad, Mom's right.

Remember that time Beaver
got his picture in the paper

for taking Mrs. Goodwin's
cat down out of that tree?

He was so embarrassed

he wouldn't come out of
his room for two whole days.

Yes, Wally, I remember
that, but I still...

- Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad.
- Hi.

Did you guys see my
picture in the paper?

Yes, we saw it.

Kind of looks like
you saw it, too.

Oh, well, I had to buy these.

Oh, you had to buy them?

Yeah, in case some of the guys

wanted me to
autograph them for them.

I think I'll sign it,
"Sincerely yours."

That's the way
John Arnett signs his.

Hi.

Hi, I didn't hear you come in.

Here, honey, want to taste this?

Yeah.

Mmm, it's delicious. Just right.

Needs a little more seasoning.

Yeah, uh, June,
what if I had said...

Never mind. Wally
and Beaver home yet?

No, both of them mentioned

something about having
football practice tonight.

That probably means
we'll be eating late.

Well, by the time Beaver

gets through granting
interviews to the press

and posing for photographers...

Now, Ward, I'm sure
that's just a passing phase.

I hope so.

Here, honey, want
to taste this again?

Just right.

Oh, hi, fellows.

Hi, Dad.

Hi, Dad.

My practice was over early,

so I went over and watched
Wally and his team play.

How was your practice, Beaver?

Great, the coach is
teaching us the new plays.

How did you make out, Wally?

Oh, pretty good. We
had an inter-squad game.

We beat them 12-6.

Well, good.

They should've done better.

Oh?

Yeah, they missed
a lot of chances.

Oh, yeah? Tell me one.

Okay, when you
received that kickoff

at the first part of the game
and only ran it back 60 yards.

Well, that sounds like a
pretty good runback to me.

Yeah, Dad, but if he'd
have cut back into midfield,

he could've ran it all
the way for a touchdown.

Oh, sure.

And that linebacker of
yours, a good quarterback

could fake him out of
his socks in every play.

Oh, and Wally,
that pass you threw

towards the last
part of the game...

Yeah? What about it?

I don't know.

What do you mean you don't know?

It gained us 20 yards.

Yeah, but your left
end was wide open.

If you'd have thrown to him,

you could've had a
touchdown for sure.

You know, Wally,
that's the kind of stuff

that's going to lose
you ball games.

Big deal.

He catches one pass,

and all of the
sudden he's an expert.

How about that, Dad?

Yeah, how about that, Wally?

Ward, you know,
I've been thinking

about Beaver and his attitude.

I suppose I'm as much
to blame as anyone

playing him up the way I did.

Oh, not necessarily, dear.

I expect everyone's been
telling him how great he is.

Dad, you mind if I
study in here in the den?

Boy, I've had it.

What's the matter, Wally?

Beaver still telling you
what's wrong with your team?

Worse than that.
He's got the rerun

of last Saturday's
pro game on TV,

and he's telling
them how to play.

Now, Ward, a few minutes
ago Whitey called up,

and Beaver said he couldn't
see him this weekend.

He was getting together

with Terry and the
guys on the team.

Oh, our hero is turning his
back on his old buddies, huh?

Yeah, Dad, just like
on Men of Annapolis.

Well, I guess it's
time for a little talk.

Hey, Dad, how about
letting me talk to him?

I could really level with him.

Well, Wally, I'm
sure someone should,

but I think that's my job.

But gee, Dad, you've
been lecturing the Beaver

for 13 years now, and
he's still pretty stupid.

Well, I mean, not that
it hasn't done any good,

but well, if I talk to him,
he might listen more.

Wally, what a thing to say.

Well, I mean, we spend

so much time together
and everything.

Hey, and anyway, another thing,

no matter how mad Dad gets,

he knows he's not
going to get pounded,

but with me, he never can tell.

Well, Wally, you may
have a point there.

All right, you go ahead
and have a talk with him.

If that doesn't
work, I'll take over.

Okay, Dad.

Boy, things sure
were a lot simpler

when he was sitting on
the bench, weren't they?

You know, I'm not
kidding you one bit, Beaver.

Ever since you caught that
crummy touchdown pass

you've been acting
like a little wise guy.

What right have you
got to start analyzing me?

You got a license or
something? Where's your couch?

Okay, okay, you just
go on being obnoxious.

That's up to you.

You know, I went through
this phony hero stuff myself.

Oh, yeah, I'll bet you did.

I did.

Remember that time I
pitched that no-hit game?

Yeah.

Boy, was I ever a hotshot,

but the next game, they
knocked me out of the box

right in the first inning.

One day I was a big shot,
the next day I was nothing.

Same thing could happen to you.

You know, you're making out

like you're the only
guy in the whole country

that ever caught a
touchdown pass before.

There's thousands of them.

And the world's filled
with guys that are doing

a lot bigger things
than catching footballs.

Yeah, well, I guess
I'm not as big of a hero

as some of those astronaut guys.

Well, then what are you acting
like such a little big shot for?

You know why you're
telling me this, Wally?

On account of
you're jealous of me.

Me jealous of you?

Yeah, I know you're a
good football player now,

but how many touchdown
passes did you catch

when you were in
the eighth grade.

Listen, Beaver,
you better wise up

and think over what I said

before you turn into
a real miserable guy.

Gee, Wally, am I
really getting that bad?

Uh, you're getting
pretty close to it.

Yeah, well, I guess I
shouldn't start feeling

like such a big shot just 'cause
they named a sundae after me.

Hey, Mom, where's Dad?

I think he's out in the garage.

How did you make out upstairs?

Oh, I don't know.

I think I started getting
through to Beaver.

Good, your father will
be happy to hear that.

Yeah, I'm happy to hear it, too,

'cause it'll be
real disillusioning

to find out after 13
years I've been sharing

a bedroom and a
bathroom with a real rat.

Good evening, Mrs. Cleaver.

Oh, hello, Eddie. Come on in.

Thank you.

Is Wallace at home?

Well, he just went
out to the garage

to talk to his father, but
he should be back shortly.

Oh, well, then I
won't disturb them.

Do you mind if I
wait for him upstairs?

No, go right ahead.

Thank you.

Oh, Mrs. Cleaver.

Yes, Eddie?

You should be very proud of
your youngest boy, Theodore.

I happened to catch

the very excellent picture
of him in the local press.

Oh, you saw it, did you?

Yes, he's developing
into quite an athlete.

You and Mr. Cleaver could
save a good deal of money

if he got a college scholarship.

Yes, Eddie.

Hi, Beaver.

Okay, Eddie, what
do you want from me?

What are you talking about?

This is the first
time in my whole life

you ever called me Beaver

instead of shrimp or
squirt or something.

You got me all wrong.

I'm on your side, big champ.

Oh, sure.

Hey, I happened to catch
your picture in the paper.

Okay, what's wrong with it?

Nothing. I thought it was great.

But are you making it pay off?

You're a celebrity.

You ought to be
cashing in on it.

What do you mean cashing in?

Look, you just read about
that ex-little league champ

the Yankees signed on
for a big bonus, didn't you?

Yeah.

And you know when
the big league scouts

started scouting him?

When he was your age.

And the same thing
can happen to you.

You play up this
publicity stuff,

and you got the 49ers
and the Colts and the Rams

all coming to you on
their hands and knees.

Yeah?

From then on, you got it made.

You endorse a car,
they give you a car.

You endorse a boat,
they give you a boat.

Yeah, well, I could
use a surfboard.

Kid, you'll have surfboards
from here to Hawaii,

but you got to be managed right.

And with me managing
you, you can't lose.

Hi, Eddie.

Hi, Sam.

And the first thing you
know, you'll be putting out

Beaver sweatshirts,
Beaver footballs...

Hey, Eddie, what
are you talking about?

This is between
Crazylegs and me.

And then you're on TV

rubbing that greasy
kid stuff in your hair.

Then you're plugging
breakfast foods

and soft drinks and...

Come on, Eddie, knock it off.

Look, I'm trying
to help the kid.

Yeah, leave him alone, Wally.

But you got to make
the right moves.

Ah, don't listen to him, Beav.

The right moves?

I'm taking a shower.

When you're a celebrity,

you got to give the
public that star image.

You're important,
so you act important.

You be independent.

You don't go to people.
You let people come to you.

Now, you take Elvis or
Frankie or Bobby Darrin...

Hey, Beav, you better
hurry down to the field.

Yeah, all the other
guys on the team

have already turned
out for practice.

I don't think I'm going
to go to practice today.

But the game's tomorrow.
The coach will let you off?

I haven't even
talked to the coach.

You haven't?

No, I've been
showing up all week,

and I know all the plays.

No sense burning myself
out before the game.

I got to save a little
something for the Rams.

Well, I think I'm going to
hang around the malt shop.

Well, see you guys.

Boy, Whitey, Beaver sure
isn't acting much like the Beaver.

I don't know what
he's acting like,

but I liked him better before.

Yeah.

Wally, you can call
Beaver to the table.

Okay, Mom.

Ward, do you
think you'll make it

to Beaver's game tomorrow?

I have a pretty
full day tomorrow,

but I think if I leave
direct from the office,

I can make it.

Oh.

Wally, do you think I could
ride to Beaver's game tomorrow

with you and Eddie?

Oh, sure, it'll be
okay with Eddie

if you don't mind
riding in the backseat.

What's the matter
with the front seat?

Oh, well, we thought
we might take Lori

along to the game with us.

Oh. Thanks, honey.

You know, the backseat's not bad

since Eddie got
that plank put in.

Plank?

Well, a couple of the
springs were coming through.

It won't be bad, June.

It'll be just like
riding a buck board.

Oh, Beaver, your entire
family's showing up

for your game tomorrow.

That's good, Dad, but
you better get there early

'cause there's going
to be a mob of people

coming out to watch us play.

I'll get it.

Me and Terry figure on
scoring three or four touchdowns.

This is a cinch game.

Hello?

Oh, yes, just a moment.

It's for you, Beaver.

Oh, thanks, Mom.

Who is it?

I have no idea who
it is. Some man.

Eddie Haskell probably
got hold of some Ram scout

and told him Beaver
weighs 250 pounds

and runs the 100
in nine seconds.

Yes, sir.

Oh, no, sir.

No, I wasn't sick or anything.
I just didn't think I had to.

Yeah, I know, but...

Yes, sir.

Yes, sir.

Yes, sir.

Is something wrong Beaver?

Who was that?

Mr. Ingersoll, my coach,

and you guys
won't have to bother

coming to the game tomorrow.

What's this?

I won't be playing.

You're not going to play?

Well, surely he'll put you
in for part of the game.

No, he told me not
even to bother to suit up.

Well, Beaver, he must
have had a reason.

Yes, sir.

Well?

It's because I didn't show
up for the practice today.

You didn't show up?

Well, how come?

The day before a game?

Yeah, I thought I was
so good I didn't need it.

Beaver, I'm going
to tell you something.

You don't have to, Dad.

Wally already told me
how creepy I've been acting,

but I was too busy
being a big shot to listen.

Boy, Beaver, if you're not
going to play in the game,

what are you going to do when
you go to school tomorrow?

I don't know.

I guess I'll just
have to go back

to being a nothing again.

Well, Beaver, we'll be happy

if you just go back
to being Beaver.

That's right, Beaver.

When you think it over,

that's really the guy
you know how to be best.

Yeah. I guess you're right, Dad,

'cause I sure got
in a lot of trouble

trying to be somebody else.

Hey, Wally, do you think
down at the malt shop

they'll take my name
off The Beaver Special?

Well, how do I know.

Look, just drink your
soup, huh, Crazylegs?

Hi, Wally.

Boy, Beav, you sure
been getting home late

this last week.

I know, but those
extra practices

I've been putting
in is really helping.

The coach is going to
start me in the next game.

Oh, good.

Hey, there's...

There's just one thing
that bothers me though.

What's that, Wally?

Well, if you catch
another touchdown pass,

you think you're head will
fit between the goal posts?

Aw, cut it out, Wally.

I'm all through with
that stuff for sure.

Yeah, I think you are, at that.

I just wasn't thinking.

What do you mean?

Well, you know when I
should've first found out

I was going haywire?

When?

When Eddie Haskell
was on my side.

Closed-Captioned By J.R.
Media Services, Inc. Burbank, CA