Leave It to Beaver (1957–1963): Season 2, Episode 32 - Friendship - full transcript

[Announcer] Leave It To Beaver.

Starring Barbara Billingsley,

Hugh Beaumont,

Tony Dow...

and Jerry Mathers...

as the Beaver.

Well, isn't that sweet? I'm sure Beaver
thinks of Larry as his best friend too.

Well, thank you again.

Bye.

Beaver's going over to
Larry's for dinner, huh?

Wasn't that nice of Larry
to ask him? It's about time.



Larry's always over
here stuffing himself.

Now, Wally, that's not the right attitude.
We don't try to match dinner invitations.

Well, gee, Mom. Then how
come you're always telling Dad...

that the Rutherfords owe us an
invitation or we owe the Mitchells one?

Wally, would you go up and
tell your brother to get dressed?

Okay, Mom.

[Shouting] Hey, Beaver,
you're getting a free meal tonight!

June! Beaver!

I have the car out. Let's go.

We couldn't find his
other good shoe. Yeah.

It was in the pants' leg
of his blue suit. Yeah. I

guess it stuck there last
time I yanked the pants off.

We better go, Beaver. I told Mrs.
Mondello I'd have you there by 5:00.

Now, Beaver, I want
you to be very polite.



I want you to thank the
Mondellos for having you over.

Don't eat with your elbows on the
table. Don't talk with your mouth full.

And if they give you
something you don't

like, you eat it anyway.
And have a good time.

Gee, Mom. If I do all that stuff,
how can I have a good time?

You'll just have to do the best you
can under the circumstances, Son.

Hey, Beave, don't slop
any stuff on my good tie.

Okay. I'll stick it in
my shirt when I eat.

Bye.

Hey, Mom, how come every
time we go out any place,

you always give us a
bunch of rules and stuff?

Well, Wally, if you boys do the
right thing when you're young,

later on being a
gentleman will come easy.

Yeah.

But what if a guy
grew up to be a tramp?

Then he'd be stuck
with all those manners.

Well, at least he'd
be a charming tramp.

Yeah, that's a point.

June, didn't these used
to be our best dishes?

When we were first
married, they were.

Now they're our third best. Huh.

I never realized marriage
was so tough on dishes.

What time do we pick Beaver
up? Oh, not for a couple of hours.

Did you thank the Mondellos when
you left him off? I didn't have a chance.

When I drove up, Larry
was waiting for Beaver

out on the front yard
with a bucket of mud.

Mud?

What would he be doing
with a bucket of mud?

Oh, I don't know. I
guess when you're nine...

and have a bucket of mud, you
want to share it with your best friend.

I suppose so.

They certainly have been good friends
for a long time. Since kindergarten.

Oh. Here's a chip
on our best dishes.

- Third best. Remember?
- Oh, yeah.

I think, all in all, we've held
up better than the dishes.

Boy, Larry, that was the
best dinner I ever had.

At our house we don't
usually have three desserts.

We don't usually have
three desserts either.

No. How many do you
usually have? Only two.

Hey, Larry, what do
you wanna do now?

Well, we could watch television,
or we could play checkers.

What do you wanna do, Beave?

I don't care. What do
you wanna do, Larry?

I don't care. But we should do
whatever you wanna do. You're the guest.

Okay. Let's play checkers.

Checkers? I don't wanna play
checkers. I wanna watch television.

Gee, Larry, you
said I was the guest.

Sure you're the guest,

but you're not gonna make me play
checkers if I don't wanna play checkers.

You're not gonna make me watch television
if I don't wanna watch television.

Boy, Beaver, you're the
meanest guest I ever had.

Tellin' a guy what to do in his own
house. You know something, Larry?

I bet if I said I wanted
to watch television,

you would've said you
wanted to play checkers.

I got a right to play
checkers if I want to.

I wouldn't play checkers
with a big ape like you.

Who's an ape? You are.

Then why'd you come over
here than? 'Cause you asked me.

What did I do a dumb thing like that
for? 'Cause you're a dumb ape, that's why.

I am not! You are too!

Well, I guess that
about does it. Uh-huh.

[Phone Ringing]
[Wally] I got it! I got it!

[Footsteps Pounding On Stairs]

Ward, do you think we ought to
put a phone upstairs for Wally?

Where would he get
his exercise? [Chuckles]

Hey, you suppose it's a girl?

Well, if it is, let's
stay in here a while. If

we go in there, he's
gonna think we're listening.

Maybe we could listen and pretend
like we're not listening. Uh-uh.

Hey, Dad, that was the Beaver.

He wants you to come right
over and pick him up at Mondellos'.

Pick him up? Why, they've
hardly finished supper.

I know, but he says for you to
come and get him right away.

Did he sound sick?

No. He sounded mad. He
was hollerin' on the phone.

I better go over and pick him up.
What do you suppose happened?

Oh, he probably goofed
up somethin' at supper

and the Mondellos
told him to get lost.

I'm sure nothing like that happened.
Well, somethin' blew up over there.

When I was on the phone, boy, did I
hear a lot of yellin' in the background.

Hey, Mom, here comes Dad
and the Beaver. I hear them, Wally!

Hello, Beaver. Hi, Mom.

You can go on
upstairs, Son. Okay, Dad.

What happened?

He and Larry had a fight.

What about? I don't know.
Beaver didn't go into details.

He just said, uh, Larry was an ape
and he never wanted to see him again.

Well, did you speak
to Larry's parents?

Oh, yeah. They were very apologetic,
but they don't know what happened either.

They just know
the boys had a fight.

Well, shouldn't we go upstairs
and try to get to the bottom of this?

After all, Larry's
Beaver's best friend.

Uh, yeah, but, uh, I think we should
let Beaver cool off a little bit first.

Boy, if I ever see that Larry
again, I'm gonna tie him to a tree,

and then I'll get an Indian
hatchet and scalp all his hair off,

and then I'll shoot arrows
into his great big stomach.

Aw, cut it out, Beaver. People
don't do stuff like that anymore.

Well, then I'll freeze him in a block of
ice and push him over Niagara Falls.

Well, uh, wouldn't it be easier
just to punch him in the nose?

You know Dad says
we're not allowed to fight.

Oh, yeah. Hey, what did Larry's father
say? I heard him hollerin' over the phone.

That wasn't him
hollerin'. That was Larry.

His father was
hittin' him. No foolin'?

Yeah, that was the best
part of the whole fight.

[Knocking]

Hi, Dad. Hello, Beaver.

Well, I guess you had quite
an evening, huh? Yes, sir.

And I had to eat coleslaw too.

Well, uh, what I
really meant, Beaver,

was it seems a shame
you had to have a fight

with Larry after being
friends all these years.

Dad's right, Beave.
So he is an ape.

There's lot of "apier" kids
in your class than Larry.

Dad, did you come
up here to punish me?

No. I came up
to tell you a story.

Is it one of those stories that
has a punishment on the end of it?

No. It's just a story about friendship
and what it meant to two people.

Oh, well, uh, is it okay if I
go down and watch TV, Dad?

Well, Wally, I think you might
find this story interesting too.

Oh. Sure, Dad.

Did you, uh— Did you ever
hear of Damon and Pythias?

Nah. We're still messin'
around with Alexander the Great.

Well, uh, anyway, Damon and
Pythias were two very great friends...

who lived a long time
ago in ancient Greece.

And this wicked king had Pythias
arrested and sentenced to death.

Were they gonna shoot arrows
into his great big stomach?

Well, I don't know
about that, Beaver.

But anyway, Pythias
made one last request.

[Clears Throat]

He asked the king to let him go home
and say good-bye to his wife and children.

But the king said, "How
do I know you'll come back?"

Yeah. Boy, that
king wasn't so dumb.

Well, anyway,

Damon, Pythias's best
friend, stepped forward...

and offered to take
Pythias's place in prison.

And he said if Pythias didn't come back,
the king could put him to death instead.

Well, do you know what happened?

Sure. Pythias never came back.

No, you're wrong. He did come
back, right on the appointed day.

And the king was so
impressed with this friendship,

that two men could
trust each other that much

and even be willing
to die for each other,

that he granted
them both a pardon.

Boy, Dad, that's
a real neat story.

People sure were nicer
people in the olden days.

Well, gee, Dad.

A guy doesn't get a chance to do
stuff like that around here in Mayfield.

Well, maybe not,

but I don't think friendship's
ever going out-of-date.

You mean me and Larry
should be friends like that?

Well, Beaver, it's a very
wonderful thing to have a real friend.

You mean we should trust
each other and die for each other?

Well, something like that, yeah.

I bet I could die for Larry,
well, if I absolutely had to.

Like if a car was
gonna run over him,

I could push him out of the way
and let it knock me down instead.

And if Larry fell out of a window, I
could catch him as he come down.

And if Larry fell on top
of me, I'd be dead all right.

Well—Well, let's hope
you can find something

less dramatic to
do for him, Beaver.

Sure, Dad. Hey,
Dad, thanks a lot.

You know, for the story. Oh.

Boy, that sure was a neat story
Dad told, huh, Beave? Yeah.

You know, I'm almost glad I
had a fight with that big ape Larry.

Is everything
straightened out? Oh, sure.

The next time Larry
falls out of a window,

Beaver's going to be
right there to catch him.

Then when Pythias came
back, the mean king was so

surprised that two guys
could be such good friends,

that he let them both go.

So we could be
friends like that.

- All right.
- Which one do you want to be?

Which one went to jail?

- Oh, Damon.
- I'll be Pythias.

Wait a minute, Larry. We just
can't say we're gonna be friends.

We gotta have an
agreement or something.

Okay.

I, Beaver Cleaver, swear
to die for Larry Mondello...

and always stick up for him
and never snitch on him...

and be his friend forever.

Now you go.

I, Larry Mondello, swear
to die for Beaver Cleaver...

and always stick up for him
and never snitch on him...

and be his friend forever even.

- Now we got an agreement.
- Yeah.

Uh, let's use it.

Okay. How will we do that?

You give me your
arithmetic homework.

My homework? Gee,
Larry, didn't you do yours?

Uh-uh. I fell asleep last night.

But gee, Larry. I can't give another guy
my homework. Miss Landers will kill me.

Not you, Beaver, 'cause
you get 90 in arithmetic...

and always do your homework.

I missed mine three days
last week. I'll be in big trouble.

Come on. Give me it. I'll stick my
name on it and nobody will ever know.

Nothin' doin', Larry.

All right. But some
Damon and Pythias you are.

Just a minute ago you made
an agreement to die for me even,

and now you won't give me a
little thing like your homework.

Boy.

Now, are we all finished
copying the assignment?

[All] Yes, Miss Landers.

It's about time for the bell to ring,
so I think we can be dismissed.

- Miss Landers?
- Yes, Judy.

- This morning you forgot to collect
our arithmetic homework.
- So I did.

If you get out your
papers, I'll do it now.

Thank you, Judy.

[Whitey] I didn't get it dirty.

My dog walked on
it while I was doin' it.

Thank you, Whitey.

Oh. Well, that's fine,
Larry. Thank you very much.

You're very welcome,
Miss Landers.

- Theodore, I'm waiting for your paper.
- I know, Miss Landers.

Did you do your homework?

Yes, I did my homework.

Then where is it?

Did you leave it at home?

- No, Miss Landers.
- Then what happened to it?

I can't tell you.

- You can't tell me?
- I can't tell you, even if you kill me.

- [Class Muttering]
- I'll bet he never even did it,
Miss Landers.

- Never mind, Judy.
- [Bell Ringing]

The rest of the class, put your papers on
my desk. Theodore, you stay after school.

Hi, Mom. Hello, Wally.

How was school? Oh, you know.

What do you want,
Wally? Nothing.

Well, you must be
looking for something.

No, I'm not. It's
not in here anyway.

Did you see Beaver on your way home? No,
but I saw Whitey Whitney from his class.

I don't think Beaver will
be home for a little while.

Why do you say that?

Well, uh, Whitey kinda said Beaver
sort of had to stay after school.

Wally, last night he was fighting with
Larry, and now he has to stay after school.

- What's gotten into him?
- Ah, don't worry, Mom.

Beaver's too chicken to
get in to any real trouble.

Theodore, it's 4:00.

Thank you, Miss Landers.

Have you decided to tell me yet why you
didn't turn in your arithmetic homework?

Well, I can't tell ya.

Beaver, I thought
you were my friend.

Oh, I'm your friend all right. Well,
then how can I be your friend?

Don't ask me any more
about the homework.

But I have to ask you.

And I have to not tell you.

Well, then, Theodore, I'm afraid I'm
gonna have to write a note to your father.

Yes, ma'am.

You know, Theodore, you've
always done your homework before,

and I've always thought you were
one of the nicest boys in this class and...

- Miss Landers?
- Yes, Theodore?

Would you just write the note and not
tell me what a nice boy I used to be...

'cause I don't want
to cry in school.

All right, Theodore.

Hi, Mom. I'm doing my homework.

I know.

Your father's talking to the
Beaver down in the living room.

About that note he
brought home? Yes.

Boy, that sure is rough
on the poor Beaver.

Well, I think it's
rough on your father.

He comes home from work tired
and then has to do something like this.

Well, you mean he
doesn't enjoy yellin' at us?

Oh, Wally, now you
know better than that.

If you boys never did anything wrong, you
wouldn't have to be scolded and lectured.

Well, gee, Mom,
that's impossible.

Just about everything a kid
does is liable to be wrong.

Oh, you're exaggerating.

Wally, look what you’ve
done. You've smudged

up your paper there
trying to correct it.

You see what I mean, Mom?

All right now, Beaver, I don't
want any more stalling around.

I want to know why you
didn't turn in your homework.

- On account of I'm Damon.
- What?

Yeah, Dad. Remember last
night you told me the story...

about Damon and Pythias
dyin' for each other?

Well, I made myself Damon...

and Larry made himself
Pythias and that's why.

Well, but what does that have
to do with your homework?

Well, I couldn't really die for Larry,
so I gave him my homework instead.

Beaver, you took all this blame and
punishment rather than tell on Larry?

What else could I do?

You said yesterday I should
be like Damon and Pythias.

Well, yes, but I...

I'm afraid in this case, being like
Damon and Pythias just doesn't work.

You mean it works for dyin'
and it doesn't work for homework?

No. I mean that I think
it was unfair of Larry...

to ask you to prove your
friendship for him in that way.

And anyhow, if you remember,

Pythias came back
on the appointed day.

He didn't let Damon
die for him, did he?

No, he sure didn't.

You know somethin', Dad? I
think that Larry is a crummy Pythias.

Well, of course, maybe he
didn't really understand the story.

Sure he did.

He sat there grinnin' all the time
I was gettin' it from Miss Landers.

Boy, when I get to school tomorrow,
I'm gonna tell her what happened.

Well, now, wait a minute, Beaver.
Just a minute. Let's think this over.

It seems to me that even though
Larry did leave you holding the bag,

that you should stick to
your end of the agreement.

But if I don't tell her what
happened to my homework,

she says I'll lose my
recesses for a whole week.

Dad, what'll I do?

Well, I—I think the next
move here is up to Pythias.

But gee, Dad. I don't think
he's gonna do anything about it.

He's in too much trouble.

Well, I guess that's just a
chance you'll have to take, huh?

Uh-huh.

You better get on upstairs
now and do your homework or

you're liable to lose your
recesses for another week.

Okay, Dad.

You know, Dad, I liked Larry a
lot better when we were fightin'.

Beaver, is everything
all straightened out?

I don't know if this is ever
gonna get straightened out, Mom.

Ward, what happened? Mm-hmm.

Well, last night I told Beaver
about Damon and Pythias.

So, to prove his friendship for
Larry, he gave him his homework.

I certainly hope he's going to
tell Miss Landers what happened.

Well, um, dear, I
suggested that he didn't.

Why, Ward?

Well, because I'm trying to
help him grow up a little bit.

Can't we call Miss Landers
and tell her? Oh, no. No.

I think we should give Larry a
chance to grow up a little bit too.

[Bell Ringing] That's all
for now, children. Recess.

Uh, everyone except Theodore.

Yes, Larry?

- Could I say something?
- Can't it wait till after recess?

It could wait, but I'm
afraid if I don't say it now,

I might not say it at all.

Well, what is it that's so important
that we should hold up recess?

On account of yesterday I
should have died instead of Beaver.

Larry, what are
you trying to say?

Well, me and
Beaver made a pact...

about he was Damon
and I was Pythias,

and to prove it, I made him
give me his arithmetic homework.

Larry, you handed Beaver's
paper in as your own?

Yes, Miss Landers.

Well, we'll talk
about this later.

But I'm happy and very proud,
Larry, that you told me the truth.

Now, we'll all go out to recess.

Miss Landers, all of us?

All of us, Theodore.

Yeah, Wally. Larry stood up right in front
of the whole class and took the blame.

No foolin'? What
did Miss Landers do?

She took his recesses away.

Boy. That Larry doesn't look like the
kinda guy who'd do somethin' like that,

but I guess he must
be the kind of guy who'd

do something like
that 'cause he did it.

Yeah.

Hey, Wally, that story about Damon
and Pythias, is that a true story?

Well, uh, I don't think so, Beaver.
It's like a lot of those stories.

You know, about the wicked kings and
castles and dragons and witches and stuff.

But if it's not true, then how come
people made up stories like that?

Well, uh, I guess
in the olden days,

people didn't have any stuff like
television, or movies, or stuff like radio,

so, I guess people just used to sit around
and tell each other stories like that.

Yeah.

I guess if you don't have anything
to hear 'em on or watch 'em on,

you gotta get stories
from somewhere.

Yeah.