Leave It to Beaver (1957–1963): Season 2, Episode 15 - The Grass Is Always Greener - full transcript
After overhearing a woman try to get out of a parking ticket and after talking to Larry about his own home life, Beaver comes to the conclusion that he should really listen to the chit-chat that happens around his own house. One piece of information that Beaver gleans from this chit-chat by his father is that they will end up in "the poor house" if things keep on the way that they are. This news makes Beaver curious about poor people, what they're like and where they hang out. When Mr. Fletcher, their neighborhood garbage man, looks like what Ward tells him some poor people look like, Beaver wants to get to know Mr. Fletcher better. Having kids Beaver's age, Mr. Fletcher is more than happy to show Beaver his home life, living in a house the other side of town near the dump. Ward is more than willing to let Beaver do this exploration, but June is concerned. When Beaver comes home excited about the great time he had at the Fletchers, Ward and June, coming from two different perspectives, believe that having the two Fletcher boys come for a visit may be the next best step, despite Wally and Beaver's assertions that there's nothing to do in their own neighborhood compared to playing in the dump. Pete and Chris Fletcher's visit shows all the Cleavers and the Fletchers what life on the other side is really like.
Leave It To Beaver.
Starring Barbara Billingsley,
Hugh Beaumont,
Tony Dow...
and Jerry Mathers...
as the Beaver.
I just went in the store for five
minutes to pick up a package.
I know the sign says "no
parking," but why would they have...
no parking in front of a store if
people have to go in the store?
If the city wants "no
parking" signs around,
why don't they put them
where people don't park?
When I was little, I
wanted to be a policeman.
But I don't wanna be one
anymore. How come, Beaver?
Well, I don't think I'd like ladies
yellin' at me all the time. Uh-huh.
You know, it's fun
listenin' to people.
Do you ever do any
listenin' at home?
What do you mean listenin'?
Like when your mom
and dad are talkin'.
No, I never listen. You're
not supposed to listen.
You hear a lot of
good stuff listenin'.
It doesn't sound like much fun.
I heard some real neat stuff
last week about my Uncle Alfred.
Two men came at night
and took his car away...
because he was
behind in somethin'.
Gee, I never hear any neat
stuff like that around my house.
That's 'cause you
don't ever listen.
I think I'll try that when I get home.
There's never anything to do anyway.
What was your
uncle behind in, Larry?
I don't know. I'm gonna listen
some more and see if I can find out.
Dear, for supper, do you want
tomatoes or corn with your lamb chops?
Twelve— Dear, tomatoes or corn?
Uh, uh, June, I'm making
out the months' checks, dear.
Oh. I'll give you corn. Yeah.
Oh, say, June, as long as you're
here, would you sign this check, please?
Well, you're signing all the
others. Why should I sign this one?
This is your dues for the
Mother's Club at Wally's school.
Well, if I sign it, the dear ladies might
be confused, seeing a man's signature.
The boys home
yet? Wally's upstairs.
Beaver's not home.
He is now.
Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad.
Hiya, Beaver. Hi, Beaver.
Who in the world's
Thomas J. Hogan?
That's the bug man. The bug man?
The exterminator who
sprays for ants every month.
Thomas J. Hogan?
Well, every time he comes
here, I always call him Charlie.
Well, that is Charlie. Hogan's the
owner. He doesn't actually spray.
He just sits in his office
and lives off our bugs.
Lots of checks. Yeah,
there's too many.
A couple of more months like this,
and we'll all wind up in the poorhouse.
Dear, did you notice
the telephone bill?
Beaver, what are you
doing, standing there?
Nothing, Dad. Just standin'.
You better go on up to your room.
You must have a lot of things to do.
Gee, there's nothin' to do
around here. I've done everything.
Well, you go up to your
room anyway. Sure, Dad.
Tell your brother to put
on a decent shirt for supper.
Okay, Mom.
Hi, Wally. I'm home.
Put on a decent
shirt for supper.
Well, who do you think you
are? I'm me. It's Mom who said it.
Oh.
Hey, Wally, you know
we might be gonna move?
Oh, yeah? Where'd
you get that from?
From listenin' to Dad.
He said in a couple
of months, we're gonna
move to the poorhouse.
Oh, Beave, that's
just an expression.
- What's an expression?
- Well, it's somethin' a person says,
but they don't really mean it.
- Oh, it's a lie.
- No, it's not a lie. Like...
Well, when a person tells
you to go jump in the lake.
Well, they don't want
you to drown or anythin'.
They just want you to beat it.
But, gee, Wally. There is such a
thing as a poorhouse, isn't there?
Well, sure. They made us
read about it in English class.
There was this kid, Oliver
Twist, who lived in a poorhouse.
Then he ran away
and lived in a cellar and
wore old clothes with
holes in 'em and stuff.
He never had to go
to school or anything.
Gee, if you're poor, there's
a lot of good stuff to do.
Yeah, and good thing about it, there's
nobody around yellin' at ya for doin' it.
Yeah.
Hey, Dad, you get the
washer fixed yet, Dad?
Yeah, j-just about. Will
that keep it from dripping?
Mm-hmm. You know, June, uh,
if you wouldn't turn it off so tight,
you wouldn't wear the washers out.
But if I don't turn
it off tight, it drips.
But if you wear the washers
out, June, it drips anyway.
Gee, Dad, I guess the only guys who
win are the guys that make washers, huh?
Come on, Wally.
Where are you going?
Well, I thought I'd get
the groceries, and then
I'd take the car by the
five-minute washrack.
Wally's coming along. Oh.
Hey, Mom, can I sit in the car
while it goes through the washrack?
Why would you wanna
do that? Gee, it's real neat.
All soap and water all around
ya, and none of it can get in at ya.
Can I? I can't, huh?
Well, I'll see ya, Dad.
Isn't that a silly thing
for a boy to want to do?
I don't know. I wouldn't mind trying
it myself if I were a little younger.
Next week I'll take you along.
Hi, Beave. Hi, Dad.
Why didn't you go shopping too?
Well, I would've had
to change my shirt.
Besides, I been
shoppin' lots of times. Oh.
There. There, that oughta
hold your mother for a while.
Well, what are you gonna do?
There's nothin' to do around here.
Dad, where's the
closest poorhouse?
- What?
- Yeah.
I wanna meet some poor
people. I never met any.
Well, they don't have
poorhouses anymore, Beaver.
Then where do the
poor people live?
Well, wherever
they can afford to.
Do they wear rags and
have holes in their clothes?
Yes, Beaver, unfortunately,
there are some people like that.
But how come we don't know any?
Well, I don't think any of
them would live around here.
Anyway, being poor
is relative, Beaver.
There's some people who are poor
in some things and very rich in others.
And then there...
Oh, there's Henry, the
trashman. Come here, Beaver.
Get out there with this trash basket
before he gets away. Sure, Dad.
Mr. Fletcher! Oh.
Oh, hi, there, Beaver. Hi.
I got some extra
trash for you. Okay.
Mr. Fletcher, you got
a hole in your sweater.
Yeah.
I'll have to get Mom to
put a patch on that, won't I?
Mr. Fletcher, are you poor?
Well, I'm a long ways from
bein' the richest man in town.
Oh. Then you live
in a poorhouse?
No, uh, I live in a house
on the other side of town.
It's no mansion, but
it's no poorhouse either.
- It's right alongside of my junkyard.
- Do you got kids and everything?
Sure. Four of 'em.
Two boys and two girls.
And a wife? Yep.
If that's bein'
poor, it's real neat.
Well, it's not bad, Beaver.
Say, I got a boy about your age.
- Why don't you come over
and visit us sometime?
- Today? Could I come today?
Well, I guess you could
come along with me in
the truck, if it's all
right with your mom.
She's not here, but I can ask
my dad. You wait right here.
Dad, can I go with
Mr. Fletcher on his truck?
He said it's okay.
Can I, Dad? Can I?
Well, wait a minute, Beaver.
Go where with Henry?
Over to his house. He's got kids
in his junkyard and everything.
Oh, I don't know, Beaver.
Maybe some other time.
Gee, Dad, he's not
askin' me some other time.
He's askin' me now. Gee, Dad,
I never rode on a truck before.
And I'll have fun!
Gee, please, Dad? I'll be good,
and there's nothin' to do around here.
Well—Well, I guess
it'll be all right, Beaver.
- But you be careful, and be home early
so your mother doesn't worry.
- Okay.
Gee, thanks, Dad.
Is it okay, Beaver? Yeah,
my dad said it was okay.
Okay, Beaver.
Hop in. Mr. Fletcher,
could I ride in back
where the trash is?
Well, I think you better
ride up in front with me.
Well, okay. That's almost as
good as ridin' with the trash.
Ward, it's 10 minutes past 4:00.
Oh.
I wish you hadn't let the
Beaver go off with Mr. Fletcher.
Oh, he's all right, dear.
But we don't even know
where the Fletchers live.
Sure we do. They're over the other
side of Euclid Avenue by the dump.
Oh, Ward, the Beaver's
isn't playing in a dump.
Probably.
Probably having the
time of his life too.
I remember when I was a
kid, Pee Wee Larson and I...
used to take our.22's over
to the dump and shoot rats.
Rats?
Yeah. They build
their nests in the trash.
Gosh, I remember one. He must
have been as big as a terrier. He...
Ward...
Ward, you let the Beaver
go off and-and play with rats?
Now, June, I'm sure he's
doing nothing of the sort.
And anyway, the Fletchers don't live in
the dump, they just live near the dump.
If I was here, I wouldn't have let him
go off and leave his nice, clean house...
and go off in some
garbage truck.
June, it isn't a garbage truck.
Hey, Mom, Dad,
look out the window.
Beaver just drove
up in a Rolls-Royce.
A Rolls-Royce?
Yeah, it's real neat.
They got a derrick
where the backseat was.
They sure have.
Why, that must be 20 years old.
Bye, Mr. Fletcher!
Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad. Hi, Wally. Hi.
Boy, did I have a good time.
Mr. Fletcher's got two real neat kids.
Chris is my age,
and Pete's older.
They got a couple of sisters, but
they beat it after we threw water at 'em.
Oh, Beaver, look
at your clothes.
Nothing bit you, did
it? Gee, no, Mom.
You should've been there. They got a
whole big dump right in their own backyard.
We found some old bedsprings, and
we were jumpin' up and down on them.
And look, Wally. I found
a real neat hairbrush.
Hey, that's all right, Beave.
Beaver, you throw that right away.
But gee, Mom. It's still real
good. It's got all its "brist-les."
Uh, you better let
me have that, Beaver.
Beaver, I'll bet you
had no lunch at all.
Sure, I did. Their mother made a
whole pile of "swift" cheese sandwiches,
and she let us eat
'em out in the junkyard.
She's real neat. She lets
kids do what they wanna do.
Oh, that's fine.
You know what else, Mom?
They said I could come over
tomorrow, and they even
said I could bring Wally.
Well, Beaver, I don't want
you to go over there tomorrow.
Gee, why not, Mom?
Well, I just don't want you to.
Gee, that's not a
good reason at all.
Uh, Beaver, why don't you have the
Fletcher boys come over here tomorrow?
Heck, there's nothing to do
around here. Is there, Wally?
- No, there's really not nothing.
- "Anything."
Yeah. You don't wanna
wear out your welcome.
You were over there today. Tomorrow,
you have them come over here.
Well, okay, Dad. That's fine.
You fellas better go on
upstairs and get washed up.
Yes, Dad. Okay, Dad.
You should have seen it,
Wally. Right in the front yard,
they had an old boiler sawed in
half and flowers growing out of it.
Ward, about those Fletcher
boys coming over here tomorrow...
Well, I'm sure there's nothing
wrong with Henry's kids.
Oh, I'm sure there isn't.
I just hope they don't
bring a rat with them.
Well, I, uh—I guess I
better throw this away.
I'll get rid of it.
Garbage trucks. Junkyard.
Beaver, you better take a bath!
Oh, dear, I thought
when the boys get here,
I'd take them all over
to the amusement park.
Get 'em a hot dog or something
over there. Oh, no. I'm fixing lunch.
"Swift" cheese? Tuna fish.
Oh. Please close that, dear.
Dear. Mm-hmm?
I hope those Fletcher boys
aren't— Well, you know, rough.
Oh, I don't think so.
Henry's a pretty solid guy.
Ward, this is Sunday. You don't
suppose he'll bring them over here...
in that Rolls-Royce
tow truck, do you?
Why not? It might add a
little class to the neighborhood.
Hey, how come you invited
both the Fletcher guys?
Well, I figured, I
could play with Chris,
and you could play with Pete.
He's almost caught
up to your age.
But, gee, Beave. I don't
even know these guys.
Anyway, I promised Chester and
Tooey I'd go to the movies with them.
Yeah, but, gee, they're both comin'.
Couldn't you just kinda hang around?
I told you, I promised
Chester and Tooey.
Anyway, there's nothing
to do around here.
Yeah, there used to be a lot of
stuff to do when we first moved in.
Well, I guess it just seemed
that way 'cause we just moved in.
Yeah.
Hey, Wally, here comes a car.
Nah, that can't be them.
That's just a regular car.
Hey, it is them. I thought they'd at
least come in the wrecker or the truck.
You know how it is, Beave. When you got
three cars, you want to show 'em all off.
Well, I better get down
there before Mom and Dad...
start askin' 'em a lot of questions
and makin' 'em feel funny.
You comin', Wally? Well, I guess it
won't hurt just to come downstairs.
Well, let's see. Uh,
this must be Pete, huh?
Yes, sir. Oh.
And, uh, then this
is Chris? Yes, sir.
Well, fine. Did you have
any trouble finding our house?
Oh, no. It's right on
Dad's trash route.
Oh, yes, that's right, isn't it?
Hi, Pete. Hi, Chris.
Hello, Beaver. Hi, Beave.
I suppose you've met
my mother and father.
And this big guy here,
he's my brother, Wally. Hi.
- He's older than I am.
- Well, what are you fellows
doing today?
I'm gonna go to the movies
with Chester and Tooey.
I figured we could go over to
Metzger's Field and mess around.
Well, lunch will be ready soon. So
you better stay around here for a while.
Well, okay. But heck, Mom,
there's nothing to do around here.
Come on, guys. Let's go out in
the backyard. Come on, Wally.
Okay.
Nice to have met
you, sir. Oh, thank you.
Well, what did you think of Chris
and Pete? Well, they're very nice.
But why all of a sudden is
there nothing to do around here?
Well, when a boy starts growing
up, he begins to get dissatisfied.
And what's handier to get
dissatisfied with than your own home?
Oh, don't be silly.
Next, you'll be saying that
they're dissatisfied with us.
Well, if I were you,
I'd be prepared.
Say, this is a nice
front yard you got.
Yeah, Pete, look
at the tree. Yeah!
Well, what's so neat
about it? It's just a tree.
Alls it's got is
leaves and stuff.
I know, but it's right
here in your own yard.
Any time you feel like climbin' it,
you can just come out and climb it.
We used to have a swing on it, but
we got tired of it after the rope broke.
If we had our own tree, I'd
build a tree house up there.
Then we could climb up there and pull up
the ladder. No wise guys could get at you.
What are you doin',
Pete? Just lyin' here.
It feels neat.
Yeah? Let me try it.
Hey, it does feel neat.
Hey, you guys ever lie around
here just thinkin' about stuff?
Thinkin' about what?
Oh, I don't know. Like
what's up in the sky.
Clouds and God and stuff.
Me and Wally don't
do much thinkin'.
Sometimes I think
about stuff like that,
but it's mostly at night.
What are the boys doing?
Lying around on the grass.
So they are.
Dear, when you were their age,
were you dissatisfied with
your home and your parents?
Oh, I guess every
kid is on occasion.
Every once in a while, I used
to get real sore at my father.
What'd you do about it? Oh, I
pretended I didn't belong to him.
I'd, uh, make believe that, uh, my
real father was the Prince of Wales,
and that any day, he'd come
driving up Shannon Avenue...
and take me back to the
castle where I belonged.
Of course, the coach
never got there, but just
thinking about it helped
me over some rough spots.
Dear, I hope our boys aren't
thinking about royal coaches.
I think they're more likely to be
thinking about Rolls-Royce tow trucks.
Our garage is back
here in the garage.
Those kids, huh?
Hey, now they're
going in the garage.
This is our garage.
We only got one car.
Hey, look at the
neat power tools.
You guys get to use this vice?
Yeah. Once we tried to squeeze
an apple in there to make apple cider,
but all we got was a mess.
We got a box of our own tools.
Wow. Boy, look at 'em. I'll bet you
could make a lot of stuff with 'em.
Hey, Wally, show 'em the
shoeshine box you almost made.
Heck, I never finished it.
I couldn't get it to
go together right.
You're supposed to
make a mortise joints.
- Well, how do you know?
- My pop showed me.
He's always showin' me stuff
like that. Mortise joints, huh?
Wally, telephone!
Um, okay, Dad.
Uh, well, I gotta get
goin'. I'll see you guys.
Mortise joints, huh?
Hey, your brother's a good
guy, isn't he? Yeah, I guess so.
'Cept when he socks me. Yeah.
Hey, Pete, go ahead. Mortise it.
It's, uh, Tooey, Wally.
Something about the movies.
Um, well,
could you kinda tell
him I can't make it?
Can't make it? Why not?
Well, I kinda thought I'd mess around
here with Beaver and the other guys.
Well, and, you know,
as long as Pete's here...
Oh, all right. You can
get on back to your friends.
Lunch will be ready
in a few minutes.
Uh, Tooey, Wally's changed
his mind about the movies.
He has company. Yeah.
Yeah, he'll see you later.
I wonder what they're
doing out there?
Oh, maybe Pete and Chris
are extolling the virtues...
of jumping on bedsprings...
and having a mother who
lets kids do what they like.
Don't worry, dear.
You still have me.
I started to make the mortise
joint. Okay? Yeah, sure.
Who was it, Wally? Um, nobody.
Uh, I was just
talkin' to... Dad.
Do you guys wanna eat
your sandwiches out here?
Can't we eat inside with your
folks? Well, yeah, if you want to.
Yeah, your dad's all right. My
pop says he's an all right guy.
He's one of the only guys on the route that
always separates the paper from the cans.
And your mom's real pretty.
She looks almost like a movie star.
Don't you think so?
Heck, to me she
just looks like a mom.
Uh, well, if you guys want
to, uh, let's go in and eat.
Okay. Then we'll come
back and finish the shoe box.
We're havin' tuna sandwiches. It's a
fish, but I never saw one all together.
I'm gonna sand it off tomorrow
after school and varnish it.
Hey, Wally, I thought you
were goin' to the movies today...
'cause there wasn't
anything to do around here.
Yeah, well, there wasn't
till those guys came over.
Yeah.
Oh, we just came
up to say good night.
Good night, Mom. Good night, Dad.
Good night, Dad. Good night, Mom.
Good night. Beaver, I asked you
not to put your shoes on the bed.
Say, those are
pretty fancy corners.
Yeah, Pete showed
me how to make 'em.
Oh. You know, uh,
I was going to suggest
that when you started it,
but I didn't know if you
wanted me butting in.
Well, gee, sure.
Um, say, Dad, uh...
Maybe we could build
some stuff together, huh? You
know, like we did when
we first got the tool chest.
Well, sure, Wally.
Anytime you say.
Hey, Mom? Yes, Beaver.
You really are
pretty, for a mother.
Hmm? Yeah.
There's a lot of movie stars that
don't look half as good as you do.
Well, thank you, Beaver.
Good night. Good night, Mom.
Well, Wally wants to
build things with me.
And all of a sudden, I
look like a movie star.
What's happened?
Well, I'm not sure,
but I think our boys are looking at us
through the eyes of the trashman's kids.
Is that good? It must be.
I've got the nicest feeling
I've had in a long time.
So do I, Ward.
Hey, Wally, if you want to get washed,
I left some soapy water in the basin.
No, thanks, Beave. I already
got washed with my own water.
Hey, Wally, what you readin'?
A guy gave it to me at school.
It's The Explorer's Handbook.
It's a thing the Boy Scouts
have for high school guys.
Do they go out in the woods and
cook without fires and stuff like that?
Oh, they go on hikes, but you
oughta see the other neat stuff they do.
The Explorers have skin diving.
They teach you how to sail and fix cars.
They show you how to
get jobs and put on plays.
They even have dances. Dances?
With girls? Well, sure, Beave.
That's all there is to dance with.
I'd rather take a million
hikes than dance with a girl.
Boy, whatever a guy
likes, they've got it.
And take a look at this emblem.
Boy, they're really up-to-date.
Yeah, it kinda looks like
a rocket ship takin' off.
I'm gonna find out more
about these Explorers.
Some of the guys are joinin' it.
Well, I guess I'm
too young to join,
but when I'm older, I
don't think I'll be too young.
We better get to school. Yeah.
Hey, Beave, aren't you gonna let
the soapy water out of the basin?
No. I figured I could save it to
wash up with when I get home.
You know, Beaver, you're goofy.
Starring Barbara Billingsley,
Hugh Beaumont,
Tony Dow...
and Jerry Mathers...
as the Beaver.
I just went in the store for five
minutes to pick up a package.
I know the sign says "no
parking," but why would they have...
no parking in front of a store if
people have to go in the store?
If the city wants "no
parking" signs around,
why don't they put them
where people don't park?
When I was little, I
wanted to be a policeman.
But I don't wanna be one
anymore. How come, Beaver?
Well, I don't think I'd like ladies
yellin' at me all the time. Uh-huh.
You know, it's fun
listenin' to people.
Do you ever do any
listenin' at home?
What do you mean listenin'?
Like when your mom
and dad are talkin'.
No, I never listen. You're
not supposed to listen.
You hear a lot of
good stuff listenin'.
It doesn't sound like much fun.
I heard some real neat stuff
last week about my Uncle Alfred.
Two men came at night
and took his car away...
because he was
behind in somethin'.
Gee, I never hear any neat
stuff like that around my house.
That's 'cause you
don't ever listen.
I think I'll try that when I get home.
There's never anything to do anyway.
What was your
uncle behind in, Larry?
I don't know. I'm gonna listen
some more and see if I can find out.
Dear, for supper, do you want
tomatoes or corn with your lamb chops?
Twelve— Dear, tomatoes or corn?
Uh, uh, June, I'm making
out the months' checks, dear.
Oh. I'll give you corn. Yeah.
Oh, say, June, as long as you're
here, would you sign this check, please?
Well, you're signing all the
others. Why should I sign this one?
This is your dues for the
Mother's Club at Wally's school.
Well, if I sign it, the dear ladies might
be confused, seeing a man's signature.
The boys home
yet? Wally's upstairs.
Beaver's not home.
He is now.
Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad.
Hiya, Beaver. Hi, Beaver.
Who in the world's
Thomas J. Hogan?
That's the bug man. The bug man?
The exterminator who
sprays for ants every month.
Thomas J. Hogan?
Well, every time he comes
here, I always call him Charlie.
Well, that is Charlie. Hogan's the
owner. He doesn't actually spray.
He just sits in his office
and lives off our bugs.
Lots of checks. Yeah,
there's too many.
A couple of more months like this,
and we'll all wind up in the poorhouse.
Dear, did you notice
the telephone bill?
Beaver, what are you
doing, standing there?
Nothing, Dad. Just standin'.
You better go on up to your room.
You must have a lot of things to do.
Gee, there's nothin' to do
around here. I've done everything.
Well, you go up to your
room anyway. Sure, Dad.
Tell your brother to put
on a decent shirt for supper.
Okay, Mom.
Hi, Wally. I'm home.
Put on a decent
shirt for supper.
Well, who do you think you
are? I'm me. It's Mom who said it.
Oh.
Hey, Wally, you know
we might be gonna move?
Oh, yeah? Where'd
you get that from?
From listenin' to Dad.
He said in a couple
of months, we're gonna
move to the poorhouse.
Oh, Beave, that's
just an expression.
- What's an expression?
- Well, it's somethin' a person says,
but they don't really mean it.
- Oh, it's a lie.
- No, it's not a lie. Like...
Well, when a person tells
you to go jump in the lake.
Well, they don't want
you to drown or anythin'.
They just want you to beat it.
But, gee, Wally. There is such a
thing as a poorhouse, isn't there?
Well, sure. They made us
read about it in English class.
There was this kid, Oliver
Twist, who lived in a poorhouse.
Then he ran away
and lived in a cellar and
wore old clothes with
holes in 'em and stuff.
He never had to go
to school or anything.
Gee, if you're poor, there's
a lot of good stuff to do.
Yeah, and good thing about it, there's
nobody around yellin' at ya for doin' it.
Yeah.
Hey, Dad, you get the
washer fixed yet, Dad?
Yeah, j-just about. Will
that keep it from dripping?
Mm-hmm. You know, June, uh,
if you wouldn't turn it off so tight,
you wouldn't wear the washers out.
But if I don't turn
it off tight, it drips.
But if you wear the washers
out, June, it drips anyway.
Gee, Dad, I guess the only guys who
win are the guys that make washers, huh?
Come on, Wally.
Where are you going?
Well, I thought I'd get
the groceries, and then
I'd take the car by the
five-minute washrack.
Wally's coming along. Oh.
Hey, Mom, can I sit in the car
while it goes through the washrack?
Why would you wanna
do that? Gee, it's real neat.
All soap and water all around
ya, and none of it can get in at ya.
Can I? I can't, huh?
Well, I'll see ya, Dad.
Isn't that a silly thing
for a boy to want to do?
I don't know. I wouldn't mind trying
it myself if I were a little younger.
Next week I'll take you along.
Hi, Beave. Hi, Dad.
Why didn't you go shopping too?
Well, I would've had
to change my shirt.
Besides, I been
shoppin' lots of times. Oh.
There. There, that oughta
hold your mother for a while.
Well, what are you gonna do?
There's nothin' to do around here.
Dad, where's the
closest poorhouse?
- What?
- Yeah.
I wanna meet some poor
people. I never met any.
Well, they don't have
poorhouses anymore, Beaver.
Then where do the
poor people live?
Well, wherever
they can afford to.
Do they wear rags and
have holes in their clothes?
Yes, Beaver, unfortunately,
there are some people like that.
But how come we don't know any?
Well, I don't think any of
them would live around here.
Anyway, being poor
is relative, Beaver.
There's some people who are poor
in some things and very rich in others.
And then there...
Oh, there's Henry, the
trashman. Come here, Beaver.
Get out there with this trash basket
before he gets away. Sure, Dad.
Mr. Fletcher! Oh.
Oh, hi, there, Beaver. Hi.
I got some extra
trash for you. Okay.
Mr. Fletcher, you got
a hole in your sweater.
Yeah.
I'll have to get Mom to
put a patch on that, won't I?
Mr. Fletcher, are you poor?
Well, I'm a long ways from
bein' the richest man in town.
Oh. Then you live
in a poorhouse?
No, uh, I live in a house
on the other side of town.
It's no mansion, but
it's no poorhouse either.
- It's right alongside of my junkyard.
- Do you got kids and everything?
Sure. Four of 'em.
Two boys and two girls.
And a wife? Yep.
If that's bein'
poor, it's real neat.
Well, it's not bad, Beaver.
Say, I got a boy about your age.
- Why don't you come over
and visit us sometime?
- Today? Could I come today?
Well, I guess you could
come along with me in
the truck, if it's all
right with your mom.
She's not here, but I can ask
my dad. You wait right here.
Dad, can I go with
Mr. Fletcher on his truck?
He said it's okay.
Can I, Dad? Can I?
Well, wait a minute, Beaver.
Go where with Henry?
Over to his house. He's got kids
in his junkyard and everything.
Oh, I don't know, Beaver.
Maybe some other time.
Gee, Dad, he's not
askin' me some other time.
He's askin' me now. Gee, Dad,
I never rode on a truck before.
And I'll have fun!
Gee, please, Dad? I'll be good,
and there's nothin' to do around here.
Well—Well, I guess
it'll be all right, Beaver.
- But you be careful, and be home early
so your mother doesn't worry.
- Okay.
Gee, thanks, Dad.
Is it okay, Beaver? Yeah,
my dad said it was okay.
Okay, Beaver.
Hop in. Mr. Fletcher,
could I ride in back
where the trash is?
Well, I think you better
ride up in front with me.
Well, okay. That's almost as
good as ridin' with the trash.
Ward, it's 10 minutes past 4:00.
Oh.
I wish you hadn't let the
Beaver go off with Mr. Fletcher.
Oh, he's all right, dear.
But we don't even know
where the Fletchers live.
Sure we do. They're over the other
side of Euclid Avenue by the dump.
Oh, Ward, the Beaver's
isn't playing in a dump.
Probably.
Probably having the
time of his life too.
I remember when I was a
kid, Pee Wee Larson and I...
used to take our.22's over
to the dump and shoot rats.
Rats?
Yeah. They build
their nests in the trash.
Gosh, I remember one. He must
have been as big as a terrier. He...
Ward...
Ward, you let the Beaver
go off and-and play with rats?
Now, June, I'm sure he's
doing nothing of the sort.
And anyway, the Fletchers don't live in
the dump, they just live near the dump.
If I was here, I wouldn't have let him
go off and leave his nice, clean house...
and go off in some
garbage truck.
June, it isn't a garbage truck.
Hey, Mom, Dad,
look out the window.
Beaver just drove
up in a Rolls-Royce.
A Rolls-Royce?
Yeah, it's real neat.
They got a derrick
where the backseat was.
They sure have.
Why, that must be 20 years old.
Bye, Mr. Fletcher!
Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad. Hi, Wally. Hi.
Boy, did I have a good time.
Mr. Fletcher's got two real neat kids.
Chris is my age,
and Pete's older.
They got a couple of sisters, but
they beat it after we threw water at 'em.
Oh, Beaver, look
at your clothes.
Nothing bit you, did
it? Gee, no, Mom.
You should've been there. They got a
whole big dump right in their own backyard.
We found some old bedsprings, and
we were jumpin' up and down on them.
And look, Wally. I found
a real neat hairbrush.
Hey, that's all right, Beave.
Beaver, you throw that right away.
But gee, Mom. It's still real
good. It's got all its "brist-les."
Uh, you better let
me have that, Beaver.
Beaver, I'll bet you
had no lunch at all.
Sure, I did. Their mother made a
whole pile of "swift" cheese sandwiches,
and she let us eat
'em out in the junkyard.
She's real neat. She lets
kids do what they wanna do.
Oh, that's fine.
You know what else, Mom?
They said I could come over
tomorrow, and they even
said I could bring Wally.
Well, Beaver, I don't want
you to go over there tomorrow.
Gee, why not, Mom?
Well, I just don't want you to.
Gee, that's not a
good reason at all.
Uh, Beaver, why don't you have the
Fletcher boys come over here tomorrow?
Heck, there's nothing to do
around here. Is there, Wally?
- No, there's really not nothing.
- "Anything."
Yeah. You don't wanna
wear out your welcome.
You were over there today. Tomorrow,
you have them come over here.
Well, okay, Dad. That's fine.
You fellas better go on
upstairs and get washed up.
Yes, Dad. Okay, Dad.
You should have seen it,
Wally. Right in the front yard,
they had an old boiler sawed in
half and flowers growing out of it.
Ward, about those Fletcher
boys coming over here tomorrow...
Well, I'm sure there's nothing
wrong with Henry's kids.
Oh, I'm sure there isn't.
I just hope they don't
bring a rat with them.
Well, I, uh—I guess I
better throw this away.
I'll get rid of it.
Garbage trucks. Junkyard.
Beaver, you better take a bath!
Oh, dear, I thought
when the boys get here,
I'd take them all over
to the amusement park.
Get 'em a hot dog or something
over there. Oh, no. I'm fixing lunch.
"Swift" cheese? Tuna fish.
Oh. Please close that, dear.
Dear. Mm-hmm?
I hope those Fletcher boys
aren't— Well, you know, rough.
Oh, I don't think so.
Henry's a pretty solid guy.
Ward, this is Sunday. You don't
suppose he'll bring them over here...
in that Rolls-Royce
tow truck, do you?
Why not? It might add a
little class to the neighborhood.
Hey, how come you invited
both the Fletcher guys?
Well, I figured, I
could play with Chris,
and you could play with Pete.
He's almost caught
up to your age.
But, gee, Beave. I don't
even know these guys.
Anyway, I promised Chester and
Tooey I'd go to the movies with them.
Yeah, but, gee, they're both comin'.
Couldn't you just kinda hang around?
I told you, I promised
Chester and Tooey.
Anyway, there's nothing
to do around here.
Yeah, there used to be a lot of
stuff to do when we first moved in.
Well, I guess it just seemed
that way 'cause we just moved in.
Yeah.
Hey, Wally, here comes a car.
Nah, that can't be them.
That's just a regular car.
Hey, it is them. I thought they'd at
least come in the wrecker or the truck.
You know how it is, Beave. When you got
three cars, you want to show 'em all off.
Well, I better get down
there before Mom and Dad...
start askin' 'em a lot of questions
and makin' 'em feel funny.
You comin', Wally? Well, I guess it
won't hurt just to come downstairs.
Well, let's see. Uh,
this must be Pete, huh?
Yes, sir. Oh.
And, uh, then this
is Chris? Yes, sir.
Well, fine. Did you have
any trouble finding our house?
Oh, no. It's right on
Dad's trash route.
Oh, yes, that's right, isn't it?
Hi, Pete. Hi, Chris.
Hello, Beaver. Hi, Beave.
I suppose you've met
my mother and father.
And this big guy here,
he's my brother, Wally. Hi.
- He's older than I am.
- Well, what are you fellows
doing today?
I'm gonna go to the movies
with Chester and Tooey.
I figured we could go over to
Metzger's Field and mess around.
Well, lunch will be ready soon. So
you better stay around here for a while.
Well, okay. But heck, Mom,
there's nothing to do around here.
Come on, guys. Let's go out in
the backyard. Come on, Wally.
Okay.
Nice to have met
you, sir. Oh, thank you.
Well, what did you think of Chris
and Pete? Well, they're very nice.
But why all of a sudden is
there nothing to do around here?
Well, when a boy starts growing
up, he begins to get dissatisfied.
And what's handier to get
dissatisfied with than your own home?
Oh, don't be silly.
Next, you'll be saying that
they're dissatisfied with us.
Well, if I were you,
I'd be prepared.
Say, this is a nice
front yard you got.
Yeah, Pete, look
at the tree. Yeah!
Well, what's so neat
about it? It's just a tree.
Alls it's got is
leaves and stuff.
I know, but it's right
here in your own yard.
Any time you feel like climbin' it,
you can just come out and climb it.
We used to have a swing on it, but
we got tired of it after the rope broke.
If we had our own tree, I'd
build a tree house up there.
Then we could climb up there and pull up
the ladder. No wise guys could get at you.
What are you doin',
Pete? Just lyin' here.
It feels neat.
Yeah? Let me try it.
Hey, it does feel neat.
Hey, you guys ever lie around
here just thinkin' about stuff?
Thinkin' about what?
Oh, I don't know. Like
what's up in the sky.
Clouds and God and stuff.
Me and Wally don't
do much thinkin'.
Sometimes I think
about stuff like that,
but it's mostly at night.
What are the boys doing?
Lying around on the grass.
So they are.
Dear, when you were their age,
were you dissatisfied with
your home and your parents?
Oh, I guess every
kid is on occasion.
Every once in a while, I used
to get real sore at my father.
What'd you do about it? Oh, I
pretended I didn't belong to him.
I'd, uh, make believe that, uh, my
real father was the Prince of Wales,
and that any day, he'd come
driving up Shannon Avenue...
and take me back to the
castle where I belonged.
Of course, the coach
never got there, but just
thinking about it helped
me over some rough spots.
Dear, I hope our boys aren't
thinking about royal coaches.
I think they're more likely to be
thinking about Rolls-Royce tow trucks.
Our garage is back
here in the garage.
Those kids, huh?
Hey, now they're
going in the garage.
This is our garage.
We only got one car.
Hey, look at the
neat power tools.
You guys get to use this vice?
Yeah. Once we tried to squeeze
an apple in there to make apple cider,
but all we got was a mess.
We got a box of our own tools.
Wow. Boy, look at 'em. I'll bet you
could make a lot of stuff with 'em.
Hey, Wally, show 'em the
shoeshine box you almost made.
Heck, I never finished it.
I couldn't get it to
go together right.
You're supposed to
make a mortise joints.
- Well, how do you know?
- My pop showed me.
He's always showin' me stuff
like that. Mortise joints, huh?
Wally, telephone!
Um, okay, Dad.
Uh, well, I gotta get
goin'. I'll see you guys.
Mortise joints, huh?
Hey, your brother's a good
guy, isn't he? Yeah, I guess so.
'Cept when he socks me. Yeah.
Hey, Pete, go ahead. Mortise it.
It's, uh, Tooey, Wally.
Something about the movies.
Um, well,
could you kinda tell
him I can't make it?
Can't make it? Why not?
Well, I kinda thought I'd mess around
here with Beaver and the other guys.
Well, and, you know,
as long as Pete's here...
Oh, all right. You can
get on back to your friends.
Lunch will be ready
in a few minutes.
Uh, Tooey, Wally's changed
his mind about the movies.
He has company. Yeah.
Yeah, he'll see you later.
I wonder what they're
doing out there?
Oh, maybe Pete and Chris
are extolling the virtues...
of jumping on bedsprings...
and having a mother who
lets kids do what they like.
Don't worry, dear.
You still have me.
I started to make the mortise
joint. Okay? Yeah, sure.
Who was it, Wally? Um, nobody.
Uh, I was just
talkin' to... Dad.
Do you guys wanna eat
your sandwiches out here?
Can't we eat inside with your
folks? Well, yeah, if you want to.
Yeah, your dad's all right. My
pop says he's an all right guy.
He's one of the only guys on the route that
always separates the paper from the cans.
And your mom's real pretty.
She looks almost like a movie star.
Don't you think so?
Heck, to me she
just looks like a mom.
Uh, well, if you guys want
to, uh, let's go in and eat.
Okay. Then we'll come
back and finish the shoe box.
We're havin' tuna sandwiches. It's a
fish, but I never saw one all together.
I'm gonna sand it off tomorrow
after school and varnish it.
Hey, Wally, I thought you
were goin' to the movies today...
'cause there wasn't
anything to do around here.
Yeah, well, there wasn't
till those guys came over.
Yeah.
Oh, we just came
up to say good night.
Good night, Mom. Good night, Dad.
Good night, Dad. Good night, Mom.
Good night. Beaver, I asked you
not to put your shoes on the bed.
Say, those are
pretty fancy corners.
Yeah, Pete showed
me how to make 'em.
Oh. You know, uh,
I was going to suggest
that when you started it,
but I didn't know if you
wanted me butting in.
Well, gee, sure.
Um, say, Dad, uh...
Maybe we could build
some stuff together, huh? You
know, like we did when
we first got the tool chest.
Well, sure, Wally.
Anytime you say.
Hey, Mom? Yes, Beaver.
You really are
pretty, for a mother.
Hmm? Yeah.
There's a lot of movie stars that
don't look half as good as you do.
Well, thank you, Beaver.
Good night. Good night, Mom.
Well, Wally wants to
build things with me.
And all of a sudden, I
look like a movie star.
What's happened?
Well, I'm not sure,
but I think our boys are looking at us
through the eyes of the trashman's kids.
Is that good? It must be.
I've got the nicest feeling
I've had in a long time.
So do I, Ward.
Hey, Wally, if you want to get washed,
I left some soapy water in the basin.
No, thanks, Beave. I already
got washed with my own water.
Hey, Wally, what you readin'?
A guy gave it to me at school.
It's The Explorer's Handbook.
It's a thing the Boy Scouts
have for high school guys.
Do they go out in the woods and
cook without fires and stuff like that?
Oh, they go on hikes, but you
oughta see the other neat stuff they do.
The Explorers have skin diving.
They teach you how to sail and fix cars.
They show you how to
get jobs and put on plays.
They even have dances. Dances?
With girls? Well, sure, Beave.
That's all there is to dance with.
I'd rather take a million
hikes than dance with a girl.
Boy, whatever a guy
likes, they've got it.
And take a look at this emblem.
Boy, they're really up-to-date.
Yeah, it kinda looks like
a rocket ship takin' off.
I'm gonna find out more
about these Explorers.
Some of the guys are joinin' it.
Well, I guess I'm
too young to join,
but when I'm older, I
don't think I'll be too young.
We better get to school. Yeah.
Hey, Beave, aren't you gonna let
the soapy water out of the basin?
No. I figured I could save it to
wash up with when I get home.
You know, Beaver, you're goofy.