Late Night with Seth Meyers (2014–…): Season 1, Episode 8 - Episode #1.8 - full transcript
Announcer: From
30 rockefeller Plaza in
New York, it's "late night with
Seth Meyers."
Tonight, Tracy Morgan.
Editor of the "new yorker,"
David remnick.
Live "new yorker" cartoons.
Featuring the 8g band with
Franklin Vanderbilt.
♪♪♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
Ladies and gentlemen,
Seth Meyers.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Seth: Good evening, I'm
Seth Meyers.
This is "late night."
How's everybody doing tonight?
[ Cheers and applause ]
That is fantastic to hear.
In that case, let's get to the
news.
Supreme court justice
Ruth bader ginsburg is
recovering in the hospital after
she fell in her office, and
fractured three ribs.
Wow, if you had told me a
supreme court justice fell over,
and broke some ribs, I would
have bet on the new guy.
I liked beer.
[ Laughter ]
Seth: That's right.
Ruth bader ginsburg is
recovering in the hospital after
breaking three ribs, and while
she's there, her staff is
planning to redo her entire
office in nerf.
[ Laughter ]
According to reports, acting
Attorney General
Matthew Whitaker, who will now
oversee special counsel
Robert Mueller's Russia
investigation has previously
said the probe has gone too far.
Why does every Trump loyalist
look like the security guard at
an illegal poker game in the
back of an Italian restaurant?
[ Laughter ]
There is no subtlety with these
guys.
[ Laughter ]
"We need someone to protect us
from the FBI.
Get me kingpin."
According to "vanity fair --"
[ Cheers and applause ]
Yeah.
According to "vanity fair,"
Donald Trump junior has been
telling friends that he's
worried about being indicted by
special counsel Robert Mueller.
Said Don junior's friends, "I'd
say, we're more like
acquaintances."
[ Laughter ]
Former CNN host Larry king
criticized his old network
yesterday saying they, quote,
stopped doing news a long time
ago.
Yeah, back when he was there,
things were different.
[ Laughter ]
[ Applause ]
A woman in Australia last week
gave birth to a 12 1/2 pound
baby without any pain relief
medication.
[ Audience groans ]
Said doctors, "congratulations,
it's a teenager."
Subway officials in New York are
rewriting the script that
conductors use when making
announcements to passengers.
From now on, all announcements
will begin with "you should buy
a car."
[ Laughter ]
NASA has warned that three large
asteroids will make a close
approach to earth this weekend,
and nobody is more nervous about
it than the dinosaurs.
[ Laughter and applause ]
A woman in Ohio was arrested
this week for allegedly stealing
more than $1,600 worth of girl
scouts cookies, but they let her
off with a warning because it
turned out they were the gluten
free kind.
[ Laughter ]
And finally, Coca cola has
announced plans to launch a new
energy drink.
They're calling it "original
recipe."
[ Cheers and applause ]
Ladies and gentlemen, we have a
fantastic show for you tonight.
He is one of our favorites, and
one of the funniest guests who
you can find at the New York
comedy festival on November 10th
at the beacon theater,
Tracy Morgan is back, everybody.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Another --
another one of our favorites,
the editor of "the new yorker,"
and "the new yorker encyclopedia
cartoons" is available now.
David remnick's back, everybody.
[ Cheers and applause ]
And you know -- you know if
David's back, we're going have a
brand-new edition of "live new
yorker cartoons" so you're here
on a great night.
So excited to talk to my guests.
Before we get to that, president
Trump is so freaked out about
democrats winning back the house
that he's already moving to
hamstring the Russia
investigation.
For more on this, it's time for
"a closer look."
♪♪♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
Seth: The more results we get
from Tuesday's elections, the
clearer it becomes that this was
a blue wave, and a national
repudiation of Trump's
presidency.
Democrats had their biggest net
gain in the house since
Watergate.
They won the popular vote in the
house by about seven points, and
they won statewide races in key
swing states like Michigan,
Pennsylvania, Ohio, and
Wisconsin.
Or as Trump put it --
the republican party defied
history, to expand our senate
majority while significantly
beating expectations in the
house for the midtown, and
midterm year.
Seth: Sorry.
Did you say the midtown year?
[ Laughter ]
Oh, okay.
I see what's happening.
Trump thought it was the midtown
election, not the midterm
election.
That's why he spent all his time
campaigning at the M&M store
with the Times Square spiderman.
[ Applause ]
"And tonight, tonight I am happy
to announce that dirty elmo has
been elected to the house of
representatives at bubba gump
shrimp."
[ Laughter and applause ]
So for a few hours, for a few
hours, the big story was
democrats massively
outperforming Republicans in the
house, and in swing states
across the country which, of
course, meant Trump had to do
something crazy to get the
spotlight back, and that's what
happened yesterday when Trump
lost his mind on national
television in a press
conference.
In fact, at one point, he got so
mad at a question about the
Russia investigation that he had
to walk away from the podium.
On the Russia investigation,
are you concerned that you may
have --
I'm not concerned about
anything with the Russia
investigation --
you may have indictments
coming down --
because it's a hoax.
Are you --
that's enough.
Put down the mic.
Mr. President, are you
worried about indictments coming
down in this investigation?
[ Laughter ]
Seth: Look at him.
President Ralph kramden over
there.
"One of these days!"
[ Applause ]
But aside -- aside from his
usual theatrics, Trump's
performance yesterday was deeply
revealing because it made it
clear that he sees himself as
above the law.
In fact, he can't even explain
how laws work, or how they're
made.
Listen to Trump ramble about how
he can't pass tax cuts because
he doesn't have the votes in
congress.
This will have to be now
proposed because if we did it
now, we don't have the votes in
the senate.
You don't have --
we would need ten democrat
votes.
We probably couldn't get them.
If we could, we could pass it
very easily in the house, but
there's no reason to waste time
because you don't have the votes
in the senate.
So now we go into the senate.
We don't have the ten votes, and
what happens?
It doesn't get passed.
Even if it gets out of the
house, it doesn't get passed.
Seth: It's like watching an
episode of "schoolhouse rock" if
the bill overdosed on Ambien.
[ Laughter ]
Now, one feature of our
constitutional system is that
congress gets to constrain the
power of the president, and
investigate him.
And right after their victory in
the house, democrats announced
that they would use that power
to request Trump's tax returns,
which he has hidden from the
public despite the fact that
presidents going back decades
have released theirs.
And when he was asked about that
yesterday, you could tell Trump
was freaking out from how much
he rambled through his answer.
Pointblank, democrats go
after
your tax returns.
Will you try to block that, or
will you allow them to have
them?
Look, as I've told you,
they're under audit.
They have been for a long time.
They're extremely complex.
People wouldn't understand them.
They're done by among the
biggest and best law firms in
the country.
Same thing with the accounting
firms.
The accountants are very, very
large, powerful firm from the
standpoint of respect.
How they respect it.
Big firm.
But when you're under audit, and
I'm under very continuous audit
because there's so many
companies, and it is a very big
company.
Far bigger than you would even
understand, but it's a great
company, but it's big, and it's
complex.
And it's probably feet high.
It's a very complex instrument,
and I think that people wouldn't
understand it.
Seth: In other words, yes I
have a girlfriend, but she goes
to another school, and the
school is in Canada, and also
she died.
[ Laughter ]
Also, what do you mean people
wouldn't understand it?
They're tax returns.
Trump sounds like a dad who
doesn't know how to answer a
question from his 5-year-old.
"Dad, where does wind come
from?"
"Uh, you wouldn't understand.
I definitely know the answer,
but you wouldn't understand."
[ Laughter ]
Trump cannot abide any checks on
his power because he sees
himself as above the law.
For him, laws aren't
constraints.
They're weapons to be wielded
against your opponents.
For example, he was asked what
would happen if democrats
exercised their constitutional
authority to investigate him,
and he said that if they did
that, he would consider it war.
Are you offering an my way,
or
highway scenario to the
democrats?
You're saying that --
negotiation.
Not at all.
If they start investigating
you, that you can play that
game, and investigate them?
Better than them.
Can you compartmentalize
that --
and I think I know more than
they know.
Can you compartmentalize
that, and still continue to work
with them for the benefit of the
rest of the country?
No.
Or are all bets off?
No.
If they do that, then it's just,
all it is, is a warlike posture.
Seth: A warlike posture?
I'm sorry, but I wouldn't say
posture is your strong suit.
[ Laughter and applause ]
You look like someone let the
air out of the michelin man.
[ Laughter ]
In fact, Trump is so petty and
vindictive that he actually took
time out of his press conference
to slam members of his own party
who lost their re-election bids,
implying that they lost because
they didn't support him enough.
Candidates who embraced our
message of low taxes, low
regulations, low crime, strong
borders, and great judges,
excelled.
Barbara comstock was another
one.
I mean, I think she could have
won that race, but she didn't
want to have any embrace.
Peter roskam didn't want the
embrace.
Erik paulsen didn't want the
embrace.
Seth: Why does he keep
calling it the embrace?
[ Laughter ]
Sounds like a Mike pence
euphemism for sex.
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
"Once --
once a year on my birthday, we
engage in the embrace."
[ Laughter ]
It's like a "Seinfeld" episode
where George Costanza complains
that he went in for a hug on a
date, and got rejected.
"I didn't get the embrace,
Jerry."
"no embrace?"
"She de-embraced."
"Looks like you'll have to
embrace yourself."
♪♪♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
It's so much like a "Seinfeld"
episode, Trump is even doing the
babu finger now.
You are a rude, terrible
person --
he's a very bad man --
[ Laughter ]
Seth: And it's not just his
petty score settling.
Trump's vindictiveness is very
much on display with his power
grab at the justice department,
and his decision to fire
Attorney General Jeff sessions.
In that press conference,
reporters tried to ask Trump how
he would approach the Russia
investigation now that the
midterms are over, and whether
he would try to install a new
Attorney General.
But Trump, who spent the entire
press conference rambling and
yelling at people, was
suspiciously coy.
Can you give us clarity, sir,
on your thinking currently, now
after the midterms about your
Attorney General, and your
deputy Attorney General?
Do they have long-term job
security?
I'd rather answer that at a
little bit different time.
Seth: You can say yes or no,
but saying I'd like to answer
that later is the most
suspicious answer you can give.
If you get pulled over, and your
answer to "have you been
drinking" is "let me get back to
you --"
[ Laughter ]
It's breathalyzer time.
Of course, it turned out that
Trump had already decided to
fire sessions, although he
refused to do it himself.
Jeff sessions was fired.
He wrote a letter today saying
that he was resigning at the
request of the president.
The president who became
famous for the phrase, "you're
fired," punting to his chief of
staff to give sessions the boot.
John Kelly didn't even do it
face to face, but opted to fire
sessions by phone.
Seth: These guys are such
cowards.
Trump didn't want to fire
sessions himself, so he had
Kelly do it, and Kelly didn't
want to do it either, so he just
called him.
I'm surprised they didn't just
send Stephen Miller to perch on
sessions' window sill.
[ Squawk ]
You're fired.
[ Squawk ]
Seth: With democrats
regaining power in Washington,
Trump is now seriously
threatened for the first time in
his presidency, and in response
he's becoming more lawless.
He sees the law not as a
constraint on his power, but as
a tool to protect himself.
And as Jeff sessions just
learned, he'll attack anyone in
his way, whether you're an
opponent who hates him, or a
supporter who gives him --
the embrace.
Seth: This has been "a closer
look."
♪♪♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
Seth: We'll be right back
with Tracy Morgan, everybody!
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪♪♪
Announcer: For more of Seth's
"closer looks," be sure to
subscribe to "late night" on
YouTube.
Seth: Welcome back,
everybody.
Give it up for the 8g band right
over there.
[ Cheers and applause ]
And we've been so lucky this
week to have the incredible
drummer for four-time grammy
winner, Lenny kravitz, whose
latest album "raise vibration"
is out now.
For more information on his
music and work in Chicago
communities, check him out on
Franklin Vanderbilt, everybody.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Thank you for a great, great
week.
Really appreciate it.
Thank you very much.
Seth: Our first guest tonight
is an Emmy nominated actor and
comedian you know from "Saturday
night live," "30 rock," and "the
last o.G."
He'll be performing at the
beacon theater Saturday
November 10th as part of the
New York comedy festival.
Please welcome back to the show
one of our favorites, our friend
Tracy Morgan, everybody.
♪♪♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
Seth: Tracy Morgan.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Tracy.
Tracy.
Tracy.
Always such a joy.
That was a lot of love, man.
Seth: Lot of love.
I feel like a magical black
dude.
Seth: Yeah.
[ Cheers and applause ]
I feel magical.
Seth: Lot of.
I'm feel like the black dude
from "green mile."
Seth: You feel like that?
[ Laughter ]
I could just touch a white
dude and feel his senses.
Yeah.
Seth: A healing hand?
Oh, my gosh.
My cold just left.
Cure your syphilis.
Yeah.
Seth: Oh, my god.
[ Laughter ]
There go the bugs.
There go the bugs.
You -- you're turning 50 on
Saturday.
Yeah.
I'm 50.
Yeah.
Seth: Happy birthday, man.
[ Cheers and applause ]
I'm joining the 5-0 club,
dog.
How old are you?
You young.
Seth: 44.
44.
You young.
Seth: Yeah.
You got another four more
years before you suffer from
e.D.
Seth: What?
[ Laughter ]
Got to start taking them blue
pills.
Seth: Yeah, yeah.
So, you had that happen to you
at 48?
No.
Seth: Okay, I got you.
[ Laughter ]
Oh, that's your --- that's your
analysis of me.
I'm still making babies.
Seth: Oh, yeah.
That's right.
You got a 5-year-old.
Yeah, she's 5, man.
Seth: And she --
yeah.
She's 5 going on 50.
Seth: Uh-huh.
I see her teeth -- tooth
first -- the first tooth came
out.
Seth: She lost a tooth.
Yeah.
And I put a dollar under her
pillow.
Seth: That's very nice.
And she's complaining the
next morning.
Seth: What?
[ Light laughter ]
She said, "my daddy got hit
by a Walmart truck and this all
I get?
[ Laughter ]
Where's my birkin bag?"
Seth: She wanted a birkin
bag.
She want a hermes bag.
Seth: What'd she do for
Halloween?
How was your Halloween?
Oh, man.
I don't know, man.
These kids today, they crazy,
man.
A kid knocked on my door for
candy.
Right?
And he was supposed to be a
ghost and his sheet was black.
Seth: Uh-huh.
[ Light laughter ]
I said, "what you supposed to
be?"
he said, "I'm a ghost."
I said, "why your sheet black?"
He said, "I'm keeping it real."
[ Laughter ]
Those holidays, man.
Seth: Thanksgiving is coming
up.
You got plans?
Thanksgiving -- Thanksgiving
coming up.
Yeah, we plan -- I plan on
eating.
Seth: Okay, that's good.
[ Laughter ]
That's it.
Seth: That's it.
That's all I'm gonna do, eat.
I'm not saying grace this year.
Last year my grandmother slipped
up and let my uncle say grace.
Seth: Okay.
He just did 25 years in
prison.
Seth: Okay.
So, he said grace like he was
still in prison.
Seth: Got it.
Institutionalized.
Seth: What does grace in
prison sound like?
He just said, "who's that
dude over there?"
I said, "that's my uncle.
Your brother.
You don't cut meat with a shank.
[ Laughter ]
Take the razor blade out your
mouth."
[ Light laughter ]
Seth: What --
Christmas.
Seth: What do you for
Christmas?
I don't lie to my kids.
Okay?
That's what I don't do.
Seth: You don't lie?
No.
Ain't no fat, jolly white dude
bring you nothing.
[ Laughter ]
You know what your mother had to
do for you to get that easy bake
oven?
[ Laughter ]
You better play with that toy
until you're 40.
[ Laughter ]
Seth: You -- you live in
New Jersey now.
Correct?
Yeah, why?
Seth: Nice neighborhood?
Am I asking you about it?
[ Laughter ]
Seth: What?
The government asking you
about it?
Seth: No.
Government always on my ass
around tax time.
Seth: How do you -- do you
know your neighbors?
Oh, man.
I live in a very affluent
neighborhood.
Seth: Okay.
Yeah.
I live in alpine, New Jersey.
My neighbor -- one of my
neighbors is the ceo of Pepsi.
Seth: Wow.
Ceo of Pepsi.
When we moved in, she came over
with a gift basket.
I was like, "oh, wow.
This is beautiful.
Thank you for welcoming me and
my family into your
neighborhood."
and she was warm and kind, and I
let her know it would be an
honor for me to one day get hit
by one of your trucks.
Seth: Wow, that's --
[ laughter ]
I did.
I did.
[ Applause ]
I did.
Be an honor.
It would be an honor.
[ Laughter ]
Seth: Hey, your show "the
last o.G."
Coming back for a second season.
A fantastic show.
Congratulations.
I love the work we did.
Thank you.
That's ripped right from my
life.
Seth: Yeah.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Ripped right from my life.
Seth: Season two spends a lot
of time dealing with
gentrification.
Yeah.
Seth: Is that something that
you remember happening in your
neighborhood?
Nah.
When I was coming up in the
neighborhood, that wasn't
happening.
Seth: Okay.
You know?
It's different now.
White people moving in.
We moving out.
The other day I was in Harlem
and I seen a white family going
down the street pushing a
stroller whistling.
I'm black and I was scared to
death to grow up there.
[ Laughter ]
And plus I don't even know how
to whistle.
[ Laughter ]
Black people, we just ain't
happy enough to whistle.
We've ain't never been happy
enough.
To whistle.
Seth: You -- you're married,
obviously.
You have a beautiful wife.
Uh-huh.
Seth: Your wife --
my wife is a dime.
Seth: Yeah.
You see, you go on Instagram,
you see my wife is beautiful.
She biracial.
Seth: Your wife is biracial.
Yeah.
She's a dime.
She ain't a nickel and five
pennies.
Seth: Uh-huh.
She ain't ten pennies.
She's a dime.
Seth: Gotcha.
Biracial.
Oh, man.
You know my first words when I
met her?
Seth: What was that?
You're going to get pregnant.
Seth: Oh, yeah.
[ Laughter ]
Now --
you're going it to get
pregnant.
Seth: Now --
I tell you the truth, man.
You know --- you know me, man.
I'm old school.
I don't pull out.
[ Laughter ]
Seth: I --
I'm old school, b.
I'm like prison.
When I come in, I come in.
[ Laughter ]
I don't believe it when --- no,
no.
I don't believe in when -- I
don't believe in wearing no
condoms on the first date.
[ Laughter ]
If you ain't willing to die for
it, you let them want it.
[ Laughter ]
My wife is half white and half
black.
So, before we make love, I take
a knee.
Now, just to let the white side
of them know black lives matter.
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
Black lives matter.
[ Laughter ]
Play no games.
That's my baby girl.
I love my wife.
I love you, Megan.
Seth: That's very sweet.
[ Laughter ]
You -- this is interesting.
a little bit.
Yeah -- 'cause the accident
scared me.
Seth: After your accident,
sure.
But before I leave, I want to
You know, and the results came
back.
You know, the results like the
chart says, like, 20% native
American.
Seth: Mm-hmm.
20% African-American.
10% Irish.
My whole chart just said dude
from Brooklyn.
Seth: Oh, wow.
[ Laughter ]
That's where I'm from.
I don't know about Africa.
I come from Brooklyn, man.
Very -- do or die, take the
girl, kill the guy.
[ Laughter ]
Seth: That was your readout.
That was your readout at
Seth: You're getting the key
to the borough.
You're getting the key to
Brooklyn.
I'm getting the key to
Brooklyn tomorrow, y'all.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Brooklyn is in the house.
Brooklyn is in the house.
Everybody know that Brooklyn in
the house.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Everybody know, Brooklyn.
Everybody, you can go to Russia
and they know Brooklyn.
If you say the word, Brooklyn,
in Russia, they get scared.
[ Laughter ]
Seth: What is -- are you
excited?
What is the ceremony gonna be
like?
Do you know -- do you have
expectations?
I don't know.
They're going to give me the key
of probably the projects or
something.
I don't know.
[ Laughter ]
I remember -- because I know
Brooklyn, man.
I remember when I came out the
coma, all my friends from
Brooklyn called.
Seth: Uh-huh.
So, Eddie Murphy call.
Chris Rob called.
Jay-Z called.
Mike Tyson called.
Seth: Mike Tyson called?
Yeah.
Mike called.
Mike said, "Tracy?"
[ Laughter ]
I said, "who this?"
"It's me, Mike Tyson.
When you come home from the
hospital, we're going to get
matching face tattoos and fly
pigeons."
[ Laughter ]
I said, "no we not.
I don't need your crazy rubbing
off on me.
[ Laughter ]
I'm already crazy.
My head is already messed up."
Seth: Oh.
See g, let me tell you
something, man.
Walmart think they done paying
me.
Okay?
They think they done.
Seth: Uh-huh.
I'm sure --
we'll see.
[ Laughter ]
I don't know the long time -- I
long term --
the long term?
Seth: Yeah.
The long term --
Seth: The long-term effects.
You see?
That's $500,000 right there.
Seth: Really?
[ Laughter ]
I don't know what the
long-term effects of this brain
damage was.
Seth: Yeah.
If I started acting messed up
in ten years, they're gonna hear
from my attorney.
Seth: Right.
"Tracy Morgan just tried to
make love to his French bulldog.
We want $5 million.
[ Laughter ]
And the dog want $2 million for
pain and suffering."
[ Laughter ]
You know what's so messed up?
When I settled to them, my
brother works for Walmart.
Seth: Uh-huh.
And my settlement starts coming
out of his check.
Seth: Oh, wow.
They start taking it out of
his check.
[ Light laughter ]
He called me.
He said, "yo, man.
Try work 60 hours, all I got was
67 cents and 34.5 cent."
I said, "you have to talk to the
dude that hit me."
[ Light laughter ]
You tell me, I don't know
nothing about that.
I got nothing to do with it.
Seth: You -- you're about to
do a show at the beacon for the
comedy festival.
Am I?
Seth: Yeah.
I am?
Seth: Yeah.
Well, I got to get something
to wear.
Seth: Yeah.
Do you -- do you feel like you
talk about politics, or you try
to ignore all that?
I stay out of politics.
Seth: Yeah.
Politics is a pile of tricks.
Look at kanye.
Seth: Yeah.
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
Stay away from that.
You see when he was talking to
the president?
The president looked at him
like, "you crazy, mother --"
[ Laughter ]
You going to get a -- what do
they call that?
A maga hat?
Seth: A maga hat, yeah.
A maga hat.
Seth: He wore it on "snl."
And he gonna move back to
Chicago.
Oh, he want to get shot.
[ Laughter ]
Somebody going to gladly put
that man out of his misery.
[ Laughter ]
Huh-uh.
I'll stay away from that.
I don't even mess with media --
social media.
Seth: Yeah, social media.
No man 'cause, you know,
there's always somebody going
back eight years to dig up some
stuff you said, you don't feel
like that now.
Seth: Right.
I don't need a thousand
strangers calling me on my
stuff.
That's what I got married for.
Seth: Right.
Yeah.
[ Laughter ]
Only my wife call me on my
junk.
Seth: I feel like, you know,
people don't have to go back
eight years, either, Tracy.
They can just --
they do, anyway.
Seth: They can just watch
this.
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
Seth: Tracy.
I'm so happy to have you here.
We are all so happy to have you
back with us, my man.
Thank you.
Seth: It is just the best.
You know Seth?
You know I love you.
Seth: I love you, too.
When we was at "snl," you
know, when you came on, I was
already on there.
You my dude.
Seth: Yeah.
You took care of me.
You always be my dude.
Seth: You took care of me
from the beginning.
Mess with him in his office
at 3:00 in the morning, make him
laugh.
Seth: Yeah.
Just cause I loved his
laughter.
It's infectious.
I love you.
Seth: Thank you.
I love you too, buddy.
[ Cheers and applause ]
That's Tracy Morgan, everybody.
We'll be right back with
David remnick.
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪♪♪
Seth: Our next guest is a
pulitzer prize winning author,
editor of "the new yorker" and
host of "the new yorker radio
hour."
"the new yorker encyclopedia of
cartoons," showcasing work from
nearly ten decades is on stands
now.
Please welcome back to the show
our friend, David remnick,
everybody.
♪♪♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
Seth: Welcome back.
How do I top Tracy Morgan?
Seth: It's very -- yeah.
Can't do it.
Seth: I will say this is one
of the joys of having a talk
show is when you can have an
evening of very diverse guests.
Tracy Morgan.
Seth: And for me,
Tracy Morgan and David remnick
is my dream show.
[ Laughter ]
I sat -- you know, we invited
him, "the new yorker" invited
him to the White House
correspondents' dinner years
ago.
And he was my guest.
We sat next to each other and
from 100 yards away, he waved at
Obama and Obama looked right at
him, went like this.
And they had -- they went up,
they had a conversation and
Tracy Morgan loved him.
Obama loved him back.
It was great.
Seth: That's great.
I can only imagine what a
fantastic thing that would be to
see.
[ Cheers and applause ]
So you wrote a couple weeks ago
about how this election would be
a referendum on Trump.
Yeah.
Seth: You wrote afterwards
that this wasn't quite a blue
wave, but that it will have
repercussions for Trump moving
forward.
What is -- a couple more days
have passed and more seats that
we thought have gone to
democrats in the last couple of
days.
Yeah.
Seth: I think since you first
wrote that.
Right.
Seth: Does it feel more like
a wave now?
And how do you think Trump is
feeling?
Trump, like blue crush, it's
not like one of those huge tidal
waves.
Seth: Yeah.
It's like a Hudson river
lapping.
Yeah.
[ Light laughter ]
Right up against, you know, the
79th street pier or something
like that.
But the big thing that happened
is the house of representatives
goes to the democrats.
And that causes the chairman and
the chairpeople of all the
committees to be democrats as
opposed to Republicans and when
they were Republicans, somebody
like Devin nunes was acting less
as an investigator of the
president and his committee as
the president's personal
attorney.
Seth: Yes.
Which was a problem.
Seth: It was a problem, sure.
And so now you have all this
investigated heat likely to come
down on the president which
will, let's face it, it's going
to cause a real storm.
Because even on a good day, even
on his best day --
[ Laughter ]
The president is capable of
behavior, well, like what you
were showing on the film.
Seth: Yes.
And this --
and now that he's going to be
quite possibly in a corner,
whether it's possibly his son
might get indicted thanks to
Robert Mueller, or something
might happen to him or they'll
look into his finances, he's
apoplectic about this.
So within 8 1/2 seconds,
8 1/2 -- maybe 8 3/4 seconds
after the election, what you had
was the president giving a press
conference that was unhinged.
And he fired the attorney
general, as expected, but
replaced him with a guy that is
just going to do his bidding.
So this is a recipe for
disaster.
Seth: I know you're not in
the prediction game, but what do
you think is going to happen
with Mueller going forward?
Do you think -- because there
was this theory out there that
Mueller was, you know,
established courtesies laying
off doing anything in the run-up
to the election.
Now that the election is over,
do you think we're going to see
a deluge of stuff from him?
I don't know what the deluge
is going to be, but there's
obviously going to be some
action.
One thing you can say about
Robert Mueller even though he's
kept his counsel so tightly,
he's not an idiot.
Seth: Yeah.
And so he knows that the
Attorney General is going to get
fired.
He knows the Attorney General is
not going to be replaced by, you
know, justice Brandeis or
something -- you know something
right-thinking and just.
I think he could have predicted
this outcome.
So I think you can expect some
action out of his office and I
think he was holding it pretty
tight close to his chest.
And it's going to be a big
drama.
And I think it's going to be a
drama on the level of its kind
like I experienced as, you know,
as a kid, Watergate.
Seth: Yeah.
In some form or another.
And it's -- one thing you can be
sure of, Seth, and this is a
great tragedy here.
To be very serious about it.
Is that we face enormous
problems in this country.
We face, you know, a climate
change problem that we can't
even get our heads around and
we're going to do nothing about
it.
For the next year.
And then we're going to be in
the -- if it gets this far,
we're going to be in a
presidential campaign and do
nothing for another year and
it's not just climate change, it
happens -- has to do with all
kinds of criminal justice
issues.
Has to do with all the things we
face.
Nothing's going to get done
unless the democrats at least
make an issue out of it because
nothing's going to come out of
the president's office.
Seth: I want to ask about
this.
You mentioned the democrats.
It did seem they were more
successful in this election
because they didn't make it as
much as about Trump.
They tried to stick with issues,
they tried to talk about health
care.
That's right.
Seth: Do you think now they
might fall into a trap because
they have this little bit of
power?
It's a problem.
Seth: Yeah.
I mean, it's a tough choice.
And a lot of people in congress,
leadership certainly, are very
wary, for example, of
impeachment because they
remember in 1998, of course,
Republicans impeached
Bill Clinton and Bill Clinton's
popularity shot through the
roof.
That's a problem.
So, you know, what can actually
help Donald Trump be re-elected?
Making his base more hardened in
their hatred of the press, of
the congress, Nancy pelosi as a
signal.
Seth: It seems like they
don't have a lot of road left to
hate it more than they already
do.
It's a problem.
Yeah.
Seth: But --
yeah.
[ Light laughter ]
Seth: Your magazine has done
so much great reporting in the
last few years.
Reporting that maybe you weren't
quite as known for as far as
breaking stories now.
We don't pretend to be a
newspaper.
Seth: Uh-huh.
But we do do investigative
reporting, so, you know, you've
seen, for example, today we
learned that Eric schneiderman,
the Attorney General, state of
New York, is not going to be
criminally indicted, but he
fessed up to his very serious
sins about his sexual behavior.
That story was written by
Jane Mayer and Ronan farrow.
So on the me too issue, for
example, "the new yorker" has
been very strong.
And Jane Mayer and many others
have been writing about the
presidency and all the drama
that goes with it with great
depth.
I'm very proud of that.
Look, I think it's a civic duty.
It's a civic duty for
journalists who have this thing
called the 1st amendment to use
it and not be intimidated by
name calling and it's very
serious.
To be called enemies of the
people, which is what Stalin
used to call his enemies.
It's no fun.
And you're always one indictment
away from trouble and that
behavior, you know, toward the
CNN reporter, acosta,
Jim acosta, the other day in the
press conference, was
disgusting.
That's the kind of behavior you
expect from autocrats somewhere
else.
Seth: Uh-huh.
Now that's -- that's here.
Seth: In this very turbulent
time, I do find, I take solace
in the fact that "the new
yorker" still finds space for
cartoons.
Look how much --
Seth: This is -- this is no
small amount of cartoons.
Seth.
Seth: Are you --
[ Cheers and applause ]
Try to lift it up in the air.
Seth: It's not -- it's the
heaviest holdup I've ever had on
the show.
Can you do a curl with it?
Seth: The new attorney
general can curl it.
Yeah.
Seth: So --
[ Light laughter ]
He can bench press it.
Seth: He can bench press.
Yeah.
So tell me, why do you think
it's endured as a part of "the
new yorker" and are you
surprised that over a century
it's endured, is a thing that
still lives in this magazine
that has, obviously is so
highbrow?
Well, you know, that's --
that's the weird chemistry of
what this is.
You know, you're reading a long
piece about politics or about
science or about medicine.
Though something may be serious.
And then weirdly all throughout
it are these little jokes.
These hand grenades of humor
that go off.
I think if it got invented
today, this idea, people would
be --
would take offense.
There would be, like, a
twitterstorm, oh, my god,
there's a piece about the war in
Yemen and there are gag cartoons
about two talking dogs.
Seth: Yeah.
While all the other cartoons
we're about to see in a few
minutes here.
Seth: And we are going to see
them again.
And thanks so much.
This is your seventh time on the
show and the seventh time that
we'll be doing live "new yorker"
cartoons.
We will be right back with
David remnick, everybody.
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪♪♪
Seth: Welcome back,
everybody.
I'm here once again with the
editor of "the new yorker,"
David remnick, everybody.
[ Cheers and applause ]
David, as we were saying, one of
the most popular features in
"the new yorker" are the
cartoons and you ultimately pick
which ones are in each issue,
correct?
That is correct.
Seth: And in what has become
a tradition here on "late
night," every time you appear on
the show, we present "live new
yorker cartoons."
And I, acting as your cartoon
niels bohr, break down the
mathematical properties of each
cartoon that caused one's mouth
to expand and emit a ha-like
sound.
Seth: I'm sorry, what does
that mean?
Well, I explain why it's
funny.
[ Laughter ]
Seth: Okay great.
Well then let's get to it,
everybody.
Without further ado, our theater
troupe in residence, the "late
night" players, are happy to
debut their newest piece, "live
new yorker cartoons part vii:
Raiders of the lost snark."
[ Cheers and applause ]
Let's take a look at our first
cartoon.
This one by Liam Walsh.
It keeps me from looking at
my
phone every two seconds.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Seth: Wow.
David, you care to explain that
cartoon to us?
Absolutely, Seth.
The man in this cartoon is
wearing a cone around his head
to prevent him from checking his
cell phone.
Much like a dog wears a cone
around his head to prevent him
himself from licking his
surgically removed testicles.
[ Laughter ]
Seth: I see, I see.
Yes.
This cartoon effectively
explores our addiction to
technology, but most
importantly, it allows me to do
one thing I've always wanted to
do.
Seth: And what's that, David?
Say the word, "testicles," on
national television.
Seth: Well, we're so very,
very happy for you.
Congratulations.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Thank you.
Seth: Our next cartoon is by
Liana finck.
It's not you, Adam.
It's men.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Seth: David, what did we just
see there?
Seth, are you familiar with
the common breakup expression,
it's not you, it's me?
Seth: I am.
Well, by simply adding the
letter, "n" -- n to the end of
that phrase, we now have a piece
of social commentary that
delivers a profoundly and
brilliantly nuanced message.
Seth: Which is what?
That men are absolutely the
[ Bleep ] worst.
Seth: Ah yes, understood.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Understood.
I get it now.
Our next cartoon is by
Jon Adams.
[ Laughter ]
Let me just charge it for ten
more seconds.
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
Seth: All right.
David, talk us through that one.
Yeah, Seth, I could go on and
on about how this cartoon is
rooted in our shared experience
of wanting to charge our devices
up to the very last minute.
Even if it means being burned
alive in a house fire.
But that's not why I ultimately
chose this cartoon.
No.
Seth: Why did you choose it?
There's just something very
funny about a man wearing
tighty-whities and calf-length
socks.
Seth: That's very --
[ Light laughter ]
Very true.
David, our next cartoon is by
Zachary kanin.
Memoir, chapter one.
At times I think I may have
never fully gotten over the
death of my parents.
[ Laughter ]
[ Applause ]
Seth: David?
Seth, are you a Batman guy or
a Superman guy?
Seth: Well, it's interesting,
David.
Because in terms of origin
story, the character's emotional
journey, not to mention his epic
battles with villains like
sinestro and the black hand, I
would have to go with
the green lantern.
God, what a dork.
Seth: A dork?
Me?
All right.
Is there anything you'd like to
say about our final cartoon?
No.
Seth: Okay.
Seth, I'd like to address
your teenage viewers with a
Thanksgiving day message.
Seth: Oh, our teenage
viewers.
Go.
Gobble, gobble, teens, it's
"the new yorker's" head Turkey,
Dr. D-rem.
Anyway, I know there's a lot for
you kids to be thankful for.
Being lit, for example.
[ Light laughter ]
Nicki Minaj's beef with cardi b.
[ Light laughter ]
And most important, long-form
literary journalism from "the
new yorker" magazine.
You know that nothing makes you
look cooler between puffs on
your e-cigs than reading a
10,000-word dissertation on the
extinction of the moderate
Republicans.
So, teens, teens, get a
subscription to "the new yorker"
magazine today.
It'll get you laid.
[ Laughter ]
Seth: Wow.
That's --
[ Light laughter ]
It'll get you laid.
Seth: Wonderful, wonderful.
[ Cheers and applause ]
All right.
Our final cartoon is by
Mick Stevens.
Let's take a look.
You never think it's going to
happen to you.
[ Laughter ]
[ Applause ]
Seth: The "late night"
players, everyone.
We will be right back.
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪♪♪
announcer: For more "late
Twitter @latenightseth and be
sure to check us out on YouTube
and Facebook.
Head over to iTunes to subscribe
to "the late night with
Seth Meyers" podcast.
You'll get a closer look and
more downloaded right to your
phone.
♪♪♪
Seth: My thanks to
Tracy Morgan, David remnick, the
"late night" players.
Franklin Vanderbilt.
Of course, the 8g band.
Stay tuned for Carson daly.
We will see you tomorrow,
everyone.
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪♪♪
30 rockefeller Plaza in
New York, it's "late night with
Seth Meyers."
Tonight, Tracy Morgan.
Editor of the "new yorker,"
David remnick.
Live "new yorker" cartoons.
Featuring the 8g band with
Franklin Vanderbilt.
♪♪♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
Ladies and gentlemen,
Seth Meyers.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Seth: Good evening, I'm
Seth Meyers.
This is "late night."
How's everybody doing tonight?
[ Cheers and applause ]
That is fantastic to hear.
In that case, let's get to the
news.
Supreme court justice
Ruth bader ginsburg is
recovering in the hospital after
she fell in her office, and
fractured three ribs.
Wow, if you had told me a
supreme court justice fell over,
and broke some ribs, I would
have bet on the new guy.
I liked beer.
[ Laughter ]
Seth: That's right.
Ruth bader ginsburg is
recovering in the hospital after
breaking three ribs, and while
she's there, her staff is
planning to redo her entire
office in nerf.
[ Laughter ]
According to reports, acting
Attorney General
Matthew Whitaker, who will now
oversee special counsel
Robert Mueller's Russia
investigation has previously
said the probe has gone too far.
Why does every Trump loyalist
look like the security guard at
an illegal poker game in the
back of an Italian restaurant?
[ Laughter ]
There is no subtlety with these
guys.
[ Laughter ]
"We need someone to protect us
from the FBI.
Get me kingpin."
According to "vanity fair --"
[ Cheers and applause ]
Yeah.
According to "vanity fair,"
Donald Trump junior has been
telling friends that he's
worried about being indicted by
special counsel Robert Mueller.
Said Don junior's friends, "I'd
say, we're more like
acquaintances."
[ Laughter ]
Former CNN host Larry king
criticized his old network
yesterday saying they, quote,
stopped doing news a long time
ago.
Yeah, back when he was there,
things were different.
[ Laughter ]
[ Applause ]
A woman in Australia last week
gave birth to a 12 1/2 pound
baby without any pain relief
medication.
[ Audience groans ]
Said doctors, "congratulations,
it's a teenager."
Subway officials in New York are
rewriting the script that
conductors use when making
announcements to passengers.
From now on, all announcements
will begin with "you should buy
a car."
[ Laughter ]
NASA has warned that three large
asteroids will make a close
approach to earth this weekend,
and nobody is more nervous about
it than the dinosaurs.
[ Laughter and applause ]
A woman in Ohio was arrested
this week for allegedly stealing
more than $1,600 worth of girl
scouts cookies, but they let her
off with a warning because it
turned out they were the gluten
free kind.
[ Laughter ]
And finally, Coca cola has
announced plans to launch a new
energy drink.
They're calling it "original
recipe."
[ Cheers and applause ]
Ladies and gentlemen, we have a
fantastic show for you tonight.
He is one of our favorites, and
one of the funniest guests who
you can find at the New York
comedy festival on November 10th
at the beacon theater,
Tracy Morgan is back, everybody.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Another --
another one of our favorites,
the editor of "the new yorker,"
and "the new yorker encyclopedia
cartoons" is available now.
David remnick's back, everybody.
[ Cheers and applause ]
And you know -- you know if
David's back, we're going have a
brand-new edition of "live new
yorker cartoons" so you're here
on a great night.
So excited to talk to my guests.
Before we get to that, president
Trump is so freaked out about
democrats winning back the house
that he's already moving to
hamstring the Russia
investigation.
For more on this, it's time for
"a closer look."
♪♪♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
Seth: The more results we get
from Tuesday's elections, the
clearer it becomes that this was
a blue wave, and a national
repudiation of Trump's
presidency.
Democrats had their biggest net
gain in the house since
Watergate.
They won the popular vote in the
house by about seven points, and
they won statewide races in key
swing states like Michigan,
Pennsylvania, Ohio, and
Wisconsin.
Or as Trump put it --
the republican party defied
history, to expand our senate
majority while significantly
beating expectations in the
house for the midtown, and
midterm year.
Seth: Sorry.
Did you say the midtown year?
[ Laughter ]
Oh, okay.
I see what's happening.
Trump thought it was the midtown
election, not the midterm
election.
That's why he spent all his time
campaigning at the M&M store
with the Times Square spiderman.
[ Applause ]
"And tonight, tonight I am happy
to announce that dirty elmo has
been elected to the house of
representatives at bubba gump
shrimp."
[ Laughter and applause ]
So for a few hours, for a few
hours, the big story was
democrats massively
outperforming Republicans in the
house, and in swing states
across the country which, of
course, meant Trump had to do
something crazy to get the
spotlight back, and that's what
happened yesterday when Trump
lost his mind on national
television in a press
conference.
In fact, at one point, he got so
mad at a question about the
Russia investigation that he had
to walk away from the podium.
On the Russia investigation,
are you concerned that you may
have --
I'm not concerned about
anything with the Russia
investigation --
you may have indictments
coming down --
because it's a hoax.
Are you --
that's enough.
Put down the mic.
Mr. President, are you
worried about indictments coming
down in this investigation?
[ Laughter ]
Seth: Look at him.
President Ralph kramden over
there.
"One of these days!"
[ Applause ]
But aside -- aside from his
usual theatrics, Trump's
performance yesterday was deeply
revealing because it made it
clear that he sees himself as
above the law.
In fact, he can't even explain
how laws work, or how they're
made.
Listen to Trump ramble about how
he can't pass tax cuts because
he doesn't have the votes in
congress.
This will have to be now
proposed because if we did it
now, we don't have the votes in
the senate.
You don't have --
we would need ten democrat
votes.
We probably couldn't get them.
If we could, we could pass it
very easily in the house, but
there's no reason to waste time
because you don't have the votes
in the senate.
So now we go into the senate.
We don't have the ten votes, and
what happens?
It doesn't get passed.
Even if it gets out of the
house, it doesn't get passed.
Seth: It's like watching an
episode of "schoolhouse rock" if
the bill overdosed on Ambien.
[ Laughter ]
Now, one feature of our
constitutional system is that
congress gets to constrain the
power of the president, and
investigate him.
And right after their victory in
the house, democrats announced
that they would use that power
to request Trump's tax returns,
which he has hidden from the
public despite the fact that
presidents going back decades
have released theirs.
And when he was asked about that
yesterday, you could tell Trump
was freaking out from how much
he rambled through his answer.
Pointblank, democrats go
after
your tax returns.
Will you try to block that, or
will you allow them to have
them?
Look, as I've told you,
they're under audit.
They have been for a long time.
They're extremely complex.
People wouldn't understand them.
They're done by among the
biggest and best law firms in
the country.
Same thing with the accounting
firms.
The accountants are very, very
large, powerful firm from the
standpoint of respect.
How they respect it.
Big firm.
But when you're under audit, and
I'm under very continuous audit
because there's so many
companies, and it is a very big
company.
Far bigger than you would even
understand, but it's a great
company, but it's big, and it's
complex.
And it's probably feet high.
It's a very complex instrument,
and I think that people wouldn't
understand it.
Seth: In other words, yes I
have a girlfriend, but she goes
to another school, and the
school is in Canada, and also
she died.
[ Laughter ]
Also, what do you mean people
wouldn't understand it?
They're tax returns.
Trump sounds like a dad who
doesn't know how to answer a
question from his 5-year-old.
"Dad, where does wind come
from?"
"Uh, you wouldn't understand.
I definitely know the answer,
but you wouldn't understand."
[ Laughter ]
Trump cannot abide any checks on
his power because he sees
himself as above the law.
For him, laws aren't
constraints.
They're weapons to be wielded
against your opponents.
For example, he was asked what
would happen if democrats
exercised their constitutional
authority to investigate him,
and he said that if they did
that, he would consider it war.
Are you offering an my way,
or
highway scenario to the
democrats?
You're saying that --
negotiation.
Not at all.
If they start investigating
you, that you can play that
game, and investigate them?
Better than them.
Can you compartmentalize
that --
and I think I know more than
they know.
Can you compartmentalize
that, and still continue to work
with them for the benefit of the
rest of the country?
No.
Or are all bets off?
No.
If they do that, then it's just,
all it is, is a warlike posture.
Seth: A warlike posture?
I'm sorry, but I wouldn't say
posture is your strong suit.
[ Laughter and applause ]
You look like someone let the
air out of the michelin man.
[ Laughter ]
In fact, Trump is so petty and
vindictive that he actually took
time out of his press conference
to slam members of his own party
who lost their re-election bids,
implying that they lost because
they didn't support him enough.
Candidates who embraced our
message of low taxes, low
regulations, low crime, strong
borders, and great judges,
excelled.
Barbara comstock was another
one.
I mean, I think she could have
won that race, but she didn't
want to have any embrace.
Peter roskam didn't want the
embrace.
Erik paulsen didn't want the
embrace.
Seth: Why does he keep
calling it the embrace?
[ Laughter ]
Sounds like a Mike pence
euphemism for sex.
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
"Once --
once a year on my birthday, we
engage in the embrace."
[ Laughter ]
It's like a "Seinfeld" episode
where George Costanza complains
that he went in for a hug on a
date, and got rejected.
"I didn't get the embrace,
Jerry."
"no embrace?"
"She de-embraced."
"Looks like you'll have to
embrace yourself."
♪♪♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
It's so much like a "Seinfeld"
episode, Trump is even doing the
babu finger now.
You are a rude, terrible
person --
he's a very bad man --
[ Laughter ]
Seth: And it's not just his
petty score settling.
Trump's vindictiveness is very
much on display with his power
grab at the justice department,
and his decision to fire
Attorney General Jeff sessions.
In that press conference,
reporters tried to ask Trump how
he would approach the Russia
investigation now that the
midterms are over, and whether
he would try to install a new
Attorney General.
But Trump, who spent the entire
press conference rambling and
yelling at people, was
suspiciously coy.
Can you give us clarity, sir,
on your thinking currently, now
after the midterms about your
Attorney General, and your
deputy Attorney General?
Do they have long-term job
security?
I'd rather answer that at a
little bit different time.
Seth: You can say yes or no,
but saying I'd like to answer
that later is the most
suspicious answer you can give.
If you get pulled over, and your
answer to "have you been
drinking" is "let me get back to
you --"
[ Laughter ]
It's breathalyzer time.
Of course, it turned out that
Trump had already decided to
fire sessions, although he
refused to do it himself.
Jeff sessions was fired.
He wrote a letter today saying
that he was resigning at the
request of the president.
The president who became
famous for the phrase, "you're
fired," punting to his chief of
staff to give sessions the boot.
John Kelly didn't even do it
face to face, but opted to fire
sessions by phone.
Seth: These guys are such
cowards.
Trump didn't want to fire
sessions himself, so he had
Kelly do it, and Kelly didn't
want to do it either, so he just
called him.
I'm surprised they didn't just
send Stephen Miller to perch on
sessions' window sill.
[ Squawk ]
You're fired.
[ Squawk ]
Seth: With democrats
regaining power in Washington,
Trump is now seriously
threatened for the first time in
his presidency, and in response
he's becoming more lawless.
He sees the law not as a
constraint on his power, but as
a tool to protect himself.
And as Jeff sessions just
learned, he'll attack anyone in
his way, whether you're an
opponent who hates him, or a
supporter who gives him --
the embrace.
Seth: This has been "a closer
look."
♪♪♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
Seth: We'll be right back
with Tracy Morgan, everybody!
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪♪♪
Announcer: For more of Seth's
"closer looks," be sure to
subscribe to "late night" on
YouTube.
Seth: Welcome back,
everybody.
Give it up for the 8g band right
over there.
[ Cheers and applause ]
And we've been so lucky this
week to have the incredible
drummer for four-time grammy
winner, Lenny kravitz, whose
latest album "raise vibration"
is out now.
For more information on his
music and work in Chicago
communities, check him out on
Franklin Vanderbilt, everybody.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Thank you for a great, great
week.
Really appreciate it.
Thank you very much.
Seth: Our first guest tonight
is an Emmy nominated actor and
comedian you know from "Saturday
night live," "30 rock," and "the
last o.G."
He'll be performing at the
beacon theater Saturday
November 10th as part of the
New York comedy festival.
Please welcome back to the show
one of our favorites, our friend
Tracy Morgan, everybody.
♪♪♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
Seth: Tracy Morgan.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Tracy.
Tracy.
Tracy.
Always such a joy.
That was a lot of love, man.
Seth: Lot of love.
I feel like a magical black
dude.
Seth: Yeah.
[ Cheers and applause ]
I feel magical.
Seth: Lot of.
I'm feel like the black dude
from "green mile."
Seth: You feel like that?
[ Laughter ]
I could just touch a white
dude and feel his senses.
Yeah.
Seth: A healing hand?
Oh, my gosh.
My cold just left.
Cure your syphilis.
Yeah.
Seth: Oh, my god.
[ Laughter ]
There go the bugs.
There go the bugs.
You -- you're turning 50 on
Saturday.
Yeah.
I'm 50.
Yeah.
Seth: Happy birthday, man.
[ Cheers and applause ]
I'm joining the 5-0 club,
dog.
How old are you?
You young.
Seth: 44.
44.
You young.
Seth: Yeah.
You got another four more
years before you suffer from
e.D.
Seth: What?
[ Laughter ]
Got to start taking them blue
pills.
Seth: Yeah, yeah.
So, you had that happen to you
at 48?
No.
Seth: Okay, I got you.
[ Laughter ]
Oh, that's your --- that's your
analysis of me.
I'm still making babies.
Seth: Oh, yeah.
That's right.
You got a 5-year-old.
Yeah, she's 5, man.
Seth: And she --
yeah.
She's 5 going on 50.
Seth: Uh-huh.
I see her teeth -- tooth
first -- the first tooth came
out.
Seth: She lost a tooth.
Yeah.
And I put a dollar under her
pillow.
Seth: That's very nice.
And she's complaining the
next morning.
Seth: What?
[ Light laughter ]
She said, "my daddy got hit
by a Walmart truck and this all
I get?
[ Laughter ]
Where's my birkin bag?"
Seth: She wanted a birkin
bag.
She want a hermes bag.
Seth: What'd she do for
Halloween?
How was your Halloween?
Oh, man.
I don't know, man.
These kids today, they crazy,
man.
A kid knocked on my door for
candy.
Right?
And he was supposed to be a
ghost and his sheet was black.
Seth: Uh-huh.
[ Light laughter ]
I said, "what you supposed to
be?"
he said, "I'm a ghost."
I said, "why your sheet black?"
He said, "I'm keeping it real."
[ Laughter ]
Those holidays, man.
Seth: Thanksgiving is coming
up.
You got plans?
Thanksgiving -- Thanksgiving
coming up.
Yeah, we plan -- I plan on
eating.
Seth: Okay, that's good.
[ Laughter ]
That's it.
Seth: That's it.
That's all I'm gonna do, eat.
I'm not saying grace this year.
Last year my grandmother slipped
up and let my uncle say grace.
Seth: Okay.
He just did 25 years in
prison.
Seth: Okay.
So, he said grace like he was
still in prison.
Seth: Got it.
Institutionalized.
Seth: What does grace in
prison sound like?
He just said, "who's that
dude over there?"
I said, "that's my uncle.
Your brother.
You don't cut meat with a shank.
[ Laughter ]
Take the razor blade out your
mouth."
[ Light laughter ]
Seth: What --
Christmas.
Seth: What do you for
Christmas?
I don't lie to my kids.
Okay?
That's what I don't do.
Seth: You don't lie?
No.
Ain't no fat, jolly white dude
bring you nothing.
[ Laughter ]
You know what your mother had to
do for you to get that easy bake
oven?
[ Laughter ]
You better play with that toy
until you're 40.
[ Laughter ]
Seth: You -- you live in
New Jersey now.
Correct?
Yeah, why?
Seth: Nice neighborhood?
Am I asking you about it?
[ Laughter ]
Seth: What?
The government asking you
about it?
Seth: No.
Government always on my ass
around tax time.
Seth: How do you -- do you
know your neighbors?
Oh, man.
I live in a very affluent
neighborhood.
Seth: Okay.
Yeah.
I live in alpine, New Jersey.
My neighbor -- one of my
neighbors is the ceo of Pepsi.
Seth: Wow.
Ceo of Pepsi.
When we moved in, she came over
with a gift basket.
I was like, "oh, wow.
This is beautiful.
Thank you for welcoming me and
my family into your
neighborhood."
and she was warm and kind, and I
let her know it would be an
honor for me to one day get hit
by one of your trucks.
Seth: Wow, that's --
[ laughter ]
I did.
I did.
[ Applause ]
I did.
Be an honor.
It would be an honor.
[ Laughter ]
Seth: Hey, your show "the
last o.G."
Coming back for a second season.
A fantastic show.
Congratulations.
I love the work we did.
Thank you.
That's ripped right from my
life.
Seth: Yeah.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Ripped right from my life.
Seth: Season two spends a lot
of time dealing with
gentrification.
Yeah.
Seth: Is that something that
you remember happening in your
neighborhood?
Nah.
When I was coming up in the
neighborhood, that wasn't
happening.
Seth: Okay.
You know?
It's different now.
White people moving in.
We moving out.
The other day I was in Harlem
and I seen a white family going
down the street pushing a
stroller whistling.
I'm black and I was scared to
death to grow up there.
[ Laughter ]
And plus I don't even know how
to whistle.
[ Laughter ]
Black people, we just ain't
happy enough to whistle.
We've ain't never been happy
enough.
To whistle.
Seth: You -- you're married,
obviously.
You have a beautiful wife.
Uh-huh.
Seth: Your wife --
my wife is a dime.
Seth: Yeah.
You see, you go on Instagram,
you see my wife is beautiful.
She biracial.
Seth: Your wife is biracial.
Yeah.
She's a dime.
She ain't a nickel and five
pennies.
Seth: Uh-huh.
She ain't ten pennies.
She's a dime.
Seth: Gotcha.
Biracial.
Oh, man.
You know my first words when I
met her?
Seth: What was that?
You're going to get pregnant.
Seth: Oh, yeah.
[ Laughter ]
Now --
you're going it to get
pregnant.
Seth: Now --
I tell you the truth, man.
You know --- you know me, man.
I'm old school.
I don't pull out.
[ Laughter ]
Seth: I --
I'm old school, b.
I'm like prison.
When I come in, I come in.
[ Laughter ]
I don't believe it when --- no,
no.
I don't believe in when -- I
don't believe in wearing no
condoms on the first date.
[ Laughter ]
If you ain't willing to die for
it, you let them want it.
[ Laughter ]
My wife is half white and half
black.
So, before we make love, I take
a knee.
Now, just to let the white side
of them know black lives matter.
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
Black lives matter.
[ Laughter ]
Play no games.
That's my baby girl.
I love my wife.
I love you, Megan.
Seth: That's very sweet.
[ Laughter ]
You -- this is interesting.
a little bit.
Yeah -- 'cause the accident
scared me.
Seth: After your accident,
sure.
But before I leave, I want to
You know, and the results came
back.
You know, the results like the
chart says, like, 20% native
American.
Seth: Mm-hmm.
20% African-American.
10% Irish.
My whole chart just said dude
from Brooklyn.
Seth: Oh, wow.
[ Laughter ]
That's where I'm from.
I don't know about Africa.
I come from Brooklyn, man.
Very -- do or die, take the
girl, kill the guy.
[ Laughter ]
Seth: That was your readout.
That was your readout at
Seth: You're getting the key
to the borough.
You're getting the key to
Brooklyn.
I'm getting the key to
Brooklyn tomorrow, y'all.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Brooklyn is in the house.
Brooklyn is in the house.
Everybody know that Brooklyn in
the house.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Everybody know, Brooklyn.
Everybody, you can go to Russia
and they know Brooklyn.
If you say the word, Brooklyn,
in Russia, they get scared.
[ Laughter ]
Seth: What is -- are you
excited?
What is the ceremony gonna be
like?
Do you know -- do you have
expectations?
I don't know.
They're going to give me the key
of probably the projects or
something.
I don't know.
[ Laughter ]
I remember -- because I know
Brooklyn, man.
I remember when I came out the
coma, all my friends from
Brooklyn called.
Seth: Uh-huh.
So, Eddie Murphy call.
Chris Rob called.
Jay-Z called.
Mike Tyson called.
Seth: Mike Tyson called?
Yeah.
Mike called.
Mike said, "Tracy?"
[ Laughter ]
I said, "who this?"
"It's me, Mike Tyson.
When you come home from the
hospital, we're going to get
matching face tattoos and fly
pigeons."
[ Laughter ]
I said, "no we not.
I don't need your crazy rubbing
off on me.
[ Laughter ]
I'm already crazy.
My head is already messed up."
Seth: Oh.
See g, let me tell you
something, man.
Walmart think they done paying
me.
Okay?
They think they done.
Seth: Uh-huh.
I'm sure --
we'll see.
[ Laughter ]
I don't know the long time -- I
long term --
the long term?
Seth: Yeah.
The long term --
Seth: The long-term effects.
You see?
That's $500,000 right there.
Seth: Really?
[ Laughter ]
I don't know what the
long-term effects of this brain
damage was.
Seth: Yeah.
If I started acting messed up
in ten years, they're gonna hear
from my attorney.
Seth: Right.
"Tracy Morgan just tried to
make love to his French bulldog.
We want $5 million.
[ Laughter ]
And the dog want $2 million for
pain and suffering."
[ Laughter ]
You know what's so messed up?
When I settled to them, my
brother works for Walmart.
Seth: Uh-huh.
And my settlement starts coming
out of his check.
Seth: Oh, wow.
They start taking it out of
his check.
[ Light laughter ]
He called me.
He said, "yo, man.
Try work 60 hours, all I got was
67 cents and 34.5 cent."
I said, "you have to talk to the
dude that hit me."
[ Light laughter ]
You tell me, I don't know
nothing about that.
I got nothing to do with it.
Seth: You -- you're about to
do a show at the beacon for the
comedy festival.
Am I?
Seth: Yeah.
I am?
Seth: Yeah.
Well, I got to get something
to wear.
Seth: Yeah.
Do you -- do you feel like you
talk about politics, or you try
to ignore all that?
I stay out of politics.
Seth: Yeah.
Politics is a pile of tricks.
Look at kanye.
Seth: Yeah.
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
Stay away from that.
You see when he was talking to
the president?
The president looked at him
like, "you crazy, mother --"
[ Laughter ]
You going to get a -- what do
they call that?
A maga hat?
Seth: A maga hat, yeah.
A maga hat.
Seth: He wore it on "snl."
And he gonna move back to
Chicago.
Oh, he want to get shot.
[ Laughter ]
Somebody going to gladly put
that man out of his misery.
[ Laughter ]
Huh-uh.
I'll stay away from that.
I don't even mess with media --
social media.
Seth: Yeah, social media.
No man 'cause, you know,
there's always somebody going
back eight years to dig up some
stuff you said, you don't feel
like that now.
Seth: Right.
I don't need a thousand
strangers calling me on my
stuff.
That's what I got married for.
Seth: Right.
Yeah.
[ Laughter ]
Only my wife call me on my
junk.
Seth: I feel like, you know,
people don't have to go back
eight years, either, Tracy.
They can just --
they do, anyway.
Seth: They can just watch
this.
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
Seth: Tracy.
I'm so happy to have you here.
We are all so happy to have you
back with us, my man.
Thank you.
Seth: It is just the best.
You know Seth?
You know I love you.
Seth: I love you, too.
When we was at "snl," you
know, when you came on, I was
already on there.
You my dude.
Seth: Yeah.
You took care of me.
You always be my dude.
Seth: You took care of me
from the beginning.
Mess with him in his office
at 3:00 in the morning, make him
laugh.
Seth: Yeah.
Just cause I loved his
laughter.
It's infectious.
I love you.
Seth: Thank you.
I love you too, buddy.
[ Cheers and applause ]
That's Tracy Morgan, everybody.
We'll be right back with
David remnick.
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪♪♪
Seth: Our next guest is a
pulitzer prize winning author,
editor of "the new yorker" and
host of "the new yorker radio
hour."
"the new yorker encyclopedia of
cartoons," showcasing work from
nearly ten decades is on stands
now.
Please welcome back to the show
our friend, David remnick,
everybody.
♪♪♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
Seth: Welcome back.
How do I top Tracy Morgan?
Seth: It's very -- yeah.
Can't do it.
Seth: I will say this is one
of the joys of having a talk
show is when you can have an
evening of very diverse guests.
Tracy Morgan.
Seth: And for me,
Tracy Morgan and David remnick
is my dream show.
[ Laughter ]
I sat -- you know, we invited
him, "the new yorker" invited
him to the White House
correspondents' dinner years
ago.
And he was my guest.
We sat next to each other and
from 100 yards away, he waved at
Obama and Obama looked right at
him, went like this.
And they had -- they went up,
they had a conversation and
Tracy Morgan loved him.
Obama loved him back.
It was great.
Seth: That's great.
I can only imagine what a
fantastic thing that would be to
see.
[ Cheers and applause ]
So you wrote a couple weeks ago
about how this election would be
a referendum on Trump.
Yeah.
Seth: You wrote afterwards
that this wasn't quite a blue
wave, but that it will have
repercussions for Trump moving
forward.
What is -- a couple more days
have passed and more seats that
we thought have gone to
democrats in the last couple of
days.
Yeah.
Seth: I think since you first
wrote that.
Right.
Seth: Does it feel more like
a wave now?
And how do you think Trump is
feeling?
Trump, like blue crush, it's
not like one of those huge tidal
waves.
Seth: Yeah.
It's like a Hudson river
lapping.
Yeah.
[ Light laughter ]
Right up against, you know, the
79th street pier or something
like that.
But the big thing that happened
is the house of representatives
goes to the democrats.
And that causes the chairman and
the chairpeople of all the
committees to be democrats as
opposed to Republicans and when
they were Republicans, somebody
like Devin nunes was acting less
as an investigator of the
president and his committee as
the president's personal
attorney.
Seth: Yes.
Which was a problem.
Seth: It was a problem, sure.
And so now you have all this
investigated heat likely to come
down on the president which
will, let's face it, it's going
to cause a real storm.
Because even on a good day, even
on his best day --
[ Laughter ]
The president is capable of
behavior, well, like what you
were showing on the film.
Seth: Yes.
And this --
and now that he's going to be
quite possibly in a corner,
whether it's possibly his son
might get indicted thanks to
Robert Mueller, or something
might happen to him or they'll
look into his finances, he's
apoplectic about this.
So within 8 1/2 seconds,
8 1/2 -- maybe 8 3/4 seconds
after the election, what you had
was the president giving a press
conference that was unhinged.
And he fired the attorney
general, as expected, but
replaced him with a guy that is
just going to do his bidding.
So this is a recipe for
disaster.
Seth: I know you're not in
the prediction game, but what do
you think is going to happen
with Mueller going forward?
Do you think -- because there
was this theory out there that
Mueller was, you know,
established courtesies laying
off doing anything in the run-up
to the election.
Now that the election is over,
do you think we're going to see
a deluge of stuff from him?
I don't know what the deluge
is going to be, but there's
obviously going to be some
action.
One thing you can say about
Robert Mueller even though he's
kept his counsel so tightly,
he's not an idiot.
Seth: Yeah.
And so he knows that the
Attorney General is going to get
fired.
He knows the Attorney General is
not going to be replaced by, you
know, justice Brandeis or
something -- you know something
right-thinking and just.
I think he could have predicted
this outcome.
So I think you can expect some
action out of his office and I
think he was holding it pretty
tight close to his chest.
And it's going to be a big
drama.
And I think it's going to be a
drama on the level of its kind
like I experienced as, you know,
as a kid, Watergate.
Seth: Yeah.
In some form or another.
And it's -- one thing you can be
sure of, Seth, and this is a
great tragedy here.
To be very serious about it.
Is that we face enormous
problems in this country.
We face, you know, a climate
change problem that we can't
even get our heads around and
we're going to do nothing about
it.
For the next year.
And then we're going to be in
the -- if it gets this far,
we're going to be in a
presidential campaign and do
nothing for another year and
it's not just climate change, it
happens -- has to do with all
kinds of criminal justice
issues.
Has to do with all the things we
face.
Nothing's going to get done
unless the democrats at least
make an issue out of it because
nothing's going to come out of
the president's office.
Seth: I want to ask about
this.
You mentioned the democrats.
It did seem they were more
successful in this election
because they didn't make it as
much as about Trump.
They tried to stick with issues,
they tried to talk about health
care.
That's right.
Seth: Do you think now they
might fall into a trap because
they have this little bit of
power?
It's a problem.
Seth: Yeah.
I mean, it's a tough choice.
And a lot of people in congress,
leadership certainly, are very
wary, for example, of
impeachment because they
remember in 1998, of course,
Republicans impeached
Bill Clinton and Bill Clinton's
popularity shot through the
roof.
That's a problem.
So, you know, what can actually
help Donald Trump be re-elected?
Making his base more hardened in
their hatred of the press, of
the congress, Nancy pelosi as a
signal.
Seth: It seems like they
don't have a lot of road left to
hate it more than they already
do.
It's a problem.
Yeah.
Seth: But --
yeah.
[ Light laughter ]
Seth: Your magazine has done
so much great reporting in the
last few years.
Reporting that maybe you weren't
quite as known for as far as
breaking stories now.
We don't pretend to be a
newspaper.
Seth: Uh-huh.
But we do do investigative
reporting, so, you know, you've
seen, for example, today we
learned that Eric schneiderman,
the Attorney General, state of
New York, is not going to be
criminally indicted, but he
fessed up to his very serious
sins about his sexual behavior.
That story was written by
Jane Mayer and Ronan farrow.
So on the me too issue, for
example, "the new yorker" has
been very strong.
And Jane Mayer and many others
have been writing about the
presidency and all the drama
that goes with it with great
depth.
I'm very proud of that.
Look, I think it's a civic duty.
It's a civic duty for
journalists who have this thing
called the 1st amendment to use
it and not be intimidated by
name calling and it's very
serious.
To be called enemies of the
people, which is what Stalin
used to call his enemies.
It's no fun.
And you're always one indictment
away from trouble and that
behavior, you know, toward the
CNN reporter, acosta,
Jim acosta, the other day in the
press conference, was
disgusting.
That's the kind of behavior you
expect from autocrats somewhere
else.
Seth: Uh-huh.
Now that's -- that's here.
Seth: In this very turbulent
time, I do find, I take solace
in the fact that "the new
yorker" still finds space for
cartoons.
Look how much --
Seth: This is -- this is no
small amount of cartoons.
Seth.
Seth: Are you --
[ Cheers and applause ]
Try to lift it up in the air.
Seth: It's not -- it's the
heaviest holdup I've ever had on
the show.
Can you do a curl with it?
Seth: The new attorney
general can curl it.
Yeah.
Seth: So --
[ Light laughter ]
He can bench press it.
Seth: He can bench press.
Yeah.
So tell me, why do you think
it's endured as a part of "the
new yorker" and are you
surprised that over a century
it's endured, is a thing that
still lives in this magazine
that has, obviously is so
highbrow?
Well, you know, that's --
that's the weird chemistry of
what this is.
You know, you're reading a long
piece about politics or about
science or about medicine.
Though something may be serious.
And then weirdly all throughout
it are these little jokes.
These hand grenades of humor
that go off.
I think if it got invented
today, this idea, people would
be --
would take offense.
There would be, like, a
twitterstorm, oh, my god,
there's a piece about the war in
Yemen and there are gag cartoons
about two talking dogs.
Seth: Yeah.
While all the other cartoons
we're about to see in a few
minutes here.
Seth: And we are going to see
them again.
And thanks so much.
This is your seventh time on the
show and the seventh time that
we'll be doing live "new yorker"
cartoons.
We will be right back with
David remnick, everybody.
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪♪♪
Seth: Welcome back,
everybody.
I'm here once again with the
editor of "the new yorker,"
David remnick, everybody.
[ Cheers and applause ]
David, as we were saying, one of
the most popular features in
"the new yorker" are the
cartoons and you ultimately pick
which ones are in each issue,
correct?
That is correct.
Seth: And in what has become
a tradition here on "late
night," every time you appear on
the show, we present "live new
yorker cartoons."
And I, acting as your cartoon
niels bohr, break down the
mathematical properties of each
cartoon that caused one's mouth
to expand and emit a ha-like
sound.
Seth: I'm sorry, what does
that mean?
Well, I explain why it's
funny.
[ Laughter ]
Seth: Okay great.
Well then let's get to it,
everybody.
Without further ado, our theater
troupe in residence, the "late
night" players, are happy to
debut their newest piece, "live
new yorker cartoons part vii:
Raiders of the lost snark."
[ Cheers and applause ]
Let's take a look at our first
cartoon.
This one by Liam Walsh.
It keeps me from looking at
my
phone every two seconds.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Seth: Wow.
David, you care to explain that
cartoon to us?
Absolutely, Seth.
The man in this cartoon is
wearing a cone around his head
to prevent him from checking his
cell phone.
Much like a dog wears a cone
around his head to prevent him
himself from licking his
surgically removed testicles.
[ Laughter ]
Seth: I see, I see.
Yes.
This cartoon effectively
explores our addiction to
technology, but most
importantly, it allows me to do
one thing I've always wanted to
do.
Seth: And what's that, David?
Say the word, "testicles," on
national television.
Seth: Well, we're so very,
very happy for you.
Congratulations.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Thank you.
Seth: Our next cartoon is by
Liana finck.
It's not you, Adam.
It's men.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Seth: David, what did we just
see there?
Seth, are you familiar with
the common breakup expression,
it's not you, it's me?
Seth: I am.
Well, by simply adding the
letter, "n" -- n to the end of
that phrase, we now have a piece
of social commentary that
delivers a profoundly and
brilliantly nuanced message.
Seth: Which is what?
That men are absolutely the
[ Bleep ] worst.
Seth: Ah yes, understood.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Understood.
I get it now.
Our next cartoon is by
Jon Adams.
[ Laughter ]
Let me just charge it for ten
more seconds.
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
Seth: All right.
David, talk us through that one.
Yeah, Seth, I could go on and
on about how this cartoon is
rooted in our shared experience
of wanting to charge our devices
up to the very last minute.
Even if it means being burned
alive in a house fire.
But that's not why I ultimately
chose this cartoon.
No.
Seth: Why did you choose it?
There's just something very
funny about a man wearing
tighty-whities and calf-length
socks.
Seth: That's very --
[ Light laughter ]
Very true.
David, our next cartoon is by
Zachary kanin.
Memoir, chapter one.
At times I think I may have
never fully gotten over the
death of my parents.
[ Laughter ]
[ Applause ]
Seth: David?
Seth, are you a Batman guy or
a Superman guy?
Seth: Well, it's interesting,
David.
Because in terms of origin
story, the character's emotional
journey, not to mention his epic
battles with villains like
sinestro and the black hand, I
would have to go with
the green lantern.
God, what a dork.
Seth: A dork?
Me?
All right.
Is there anything you'd like to
say about our final cartoon?
No.
Seth: Okay.
Seth, I'd like to address
your teenage viewers with a
Thanksgiving day message.
Seth: Oh, our teenage
viewers.
Go.
Gobble, gobble, teens, it's
"the new yorker's" head Turkey,
Dr. D-rem.
Anyway, I know there's a lot for
you kids to be thankful for.
Being lit, for example.
[ Light laughter ]
Nicki Minaj's beef with cardi b.
[ Light laughter ]
And most important, long-form
literary journalism from "the
new yorker" magazine.
You know that nothing makes you
look cooler between puffs on
your e-cigs than reading a
10,000-word dissertation on the
extinction of the moderate
Republicans.
So, teens, teens, get a
subscription to "the new yorker"
magazine today.
It'll get you laid.
[ Laughter ]
Seth: Wow.
That's --
[ Light laughter ]
It'll get you laid.
Seth: Wonderful, wonderful.
[ Cheers and applause ]
All right.
Our final cartoon is by
Mick Stevens.
Let's take a look.
You never think it's going to
happen to you.
[ Laughter ]
[ Applause ]
Seth: The "late night"
players, everyone.
We will be right back.
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪♪♪
announcer: For more "late
Twitter @latenightseth and be
sure to check us out on YouTube
and Facebook.
Head over to iTunes to subscribe
to "the late night with
Seth Meyers" podcast.
You'll get a closer look and
more downloaded right to your
phone.
♪♪♪
Seth: My thanks to
Tracy Morgan, David remnick, the
"late night" players.
Franklin Vanderbilt.
Of course, the 8g band.
Stay tuned for Carson daly.
We will see you tomorrow,
everyone.
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪♪♪