Las Vegas (2003–2008): Season 2, Episode 4 - Catch of the Day - full transcript

An old boyfriend of Delinda's comes to town to fulfill some fantasies which includes having sex with someone cause he's dying. Delinda at first doesn't believe him but Ed learns it's true. And one of Sam's whales who has a big party and what he wants to serve is lobsters but someone steals them. So Danny has to try and find them. And Michael Buble, who's scheduled to perform announces he's giving up singing and wants to do other things. Which makes Mary worried.

Hit me! Big ten!

Double down!

Little one. Yes!

$50,000 a hand on two tables
for the last 12 hours.

You gotta love Big Willie.
How are the plans going
for his daughter's wedding?

Great. The east ballroom,
decked out with...

Show me some good love!

Sam's wrangled up 1,000 live
Maine lobsters,
arriving within the hour.

Lobster!

Okay.
The man loves his shellfish.

I've booked Michael Bubl?
to sing at the reception.



Who?
Trust me, he's great.

Big Willie's daughter is
a huge fan.

She's going to have
one hell of a wedding.

Yeah, nothing but the best
for Sam's number one client.

Blackjack!

No change the dealer.

Mary, hi.
Hi.

We were just wondering about
the soap in our rooms.

Yes. Certified organic.
No tallow or animal testing.

I promise you, your convention
will not only be enjoyable,
it'll be cruelty-free.

Michael, hi.
Thanks. Hi.

Hi. I'm Mary Connell.
I am so happy that
you're able to make it.

I didn't have much of
a choice. I was all set
to play London...

and the next thing I know
my agent and manager arrive...



on a Montecito jet
and drag me down here.
So, you're not upset?

No, I just haven't played
a private party in years.

I was thinking maybe I could
try something new for
Big Willie and his daughter.

You know, keep things fresh.
Fresh is good.

Good. I got some ideas.
I'll run them by you later?

That sounds great.
Okay. Bye.

I'm sorry, I'm not in
the business of looking after
out-of-town guests.

That's Sam's job.

You don't have to
entertain him, just keep him
company for a few hours.

I'm buried at work.
Believe me,
you won't regret it.

Still trying to pawn off
your ninth grade boyfriend?

He wasn't just my boyfriend.

When I met Jay,
we had just moved
for the third time in a year.

My 14th school in all.
No one would talk to me.

God, girls can be so mean.
I just needed someone
to talk to.

I needed a friend.
And that's when I met Jay.

He was always there for me,
no matter what.

Didn't you break his nose?
Only after
he tried to kiss me.

That doesn't sound like
you at all.
I used to be a tomboy.

That's quite a change.
Promise me...

both of you, you'll be nice.

Dee?

Please.

I promise I'll be nice.
Me, too.

Mike?
Hey.

What's new?
Three drunks,
two card counters...

and a guy who insisted
he was Elvis demanded
a free room.

Really? I mean, was it him?
Was it the King?

More like the queen,
he was wearing a dress.

Surveillance. What?
When? Thanks.

Someone just stole
a lobster delivery truck.

Where's Danny?

Yeah?
Yeah, I'm way ahead of you
on this one, Ed.

Nothing to worry.

I'll get back to you.

So, why Vegas?
The last items on
my to-do list.

To-do list?
I have four more to go.

Witness a desert sunrise,
sing over the canals of
Venice...

and skydive over Sin City.
That's only three.

You always save
the best for last.

Make love to the first girl
I ever kissed.

That's so sweet.

Delinda, you were
the first girl I ever kissed.

That last one might take you
some time.
I hope not.

I only have a month to live.
I'm dying of cancer.

So, you guys let us know
if you find anything, okay?

Traffic control followed
the truck over the 15...

but by the time Metro had
any cars in the area,
it was long gone.

I need you to find
the son of a bitch who
stole the truck, all right?

Ed, with all due respect,
they stole lobsters.

Yeah, lobsters
for Big Willie Chen.

On his last visit,
he dropped $10 million.

Stay! Double down!

Inoperable and untreatable.

Doctors gave me
six months to live
five months ago.

What kind of cancer?
I don't want to
talk about it.

It just bums me out.

If you were really sick,
wouldn't you be in a hospital?

If there's nothing
they can do for you,

lying around in
a cancer ward...

is depressing,
not to mention
a total waste of time.

Yeah, and trying to
sleep with me isn't?

Not if there's a chance
you'll say yes.

You forget I've known you
since the ninth grade...

and still remember
all those pranks
you used to pull.

Pranks? Me?

Like at graduation, you had
all the diplomas printed
in invisible ink.

Saying you have cancer
just to get me into bed
would be right up your alley.

Except this time
it's not funny.
That's because
it's not a joke.

This is all we have.
It looks like a foot.

I was thinking foot, too.

Well, then...

I guess our work is
done here today, boys.

We were robbed by a foot.

I can't believe you lost
my lobsters.

Nobody lost your lobsters.
They were stolen.

Ed, Big Willie invited his
closest, dearest...

Okay, richest friends
to his daughter's wedding.
I planned on harpooning...

a few stray whales before
they migrated out of town.
I need my lobsters.

Well, then, Captain Ahab,
I suggest you
hunt some more down.

Yes, sir.

Hit me again! Yes! Hit!

Desert sunrise,
sing in front of thousands,
or skydive over the city?

I'm definitely not jumping
out of a plane.

So then it's decided.
We're skydiving.

I don't think you heard me.
I said no.
Okay.

Then sleep with me.
I'm not doing that either.

Nessa, some of the
best memories I have...

are because I did things
that I swore I never would do.

Like running with the bulls
in Pamplona.
Let's stick with skydiving.

Okay.
Okay.

What if my chute doesn't open
and I crater at
200 miles an hour?

That's not going to be fun.
Come on. Don't be silly.

That could never happen.
Really?

And you wouldn't crater,
you'd bounce.
Bounce?

So, you want to fool around
before or after we skydive?

I don't want to sound
like a star-struck teenager
or anything...

but, God, I just love
hearing you sing.

You are like Frank Sinatra...

and Bobby Darin
all rolled into one.
Mime.

Yeah, I don't know him.
Does he sing, too?
No, I want to do mime.

You're kidding.
Mime has always been
my first love.

But Big Willie hired you
to sing.
No, Big Willie hired me
to perform.

It says so in the contract.
What I do is up to me.

Come on, you can't give up
singing now.

Your career is
just taking off.

Just watch.
I call this one
"Bubl? in the Bubble."

Okay, then, Michael?

Michael.

Mary, you don't have to yell.
Mimes can hear,
they just can't talk.

Yeah.

So, let me get this straight.

You want 1,000 of my lobster?
Yes.

You stole my boyfriend.
Yeah, but he had a little...

At our engagement party.
He didn't tell me who he was.

Sweetie, that guy was a jerk.

So if you think about it,
I actually saved you
years of pain and suffering.

I mean, I think that you and I
could possibly be
best girlfriends.

Why would you even
come to me?
Because of your
incredible reputation.

Everybody knows about you:
Wendy, freshest seafood
in Vegas.

And everyone in town
already said no.
What are you talking about?

You're my first choice.

What's it worth to you?
How much do you charge...

for a lobster dinner?
$85.

I'll take 1,000
lobster dinners to go.
I'll even round it out...

to a cool $100,000.
Cash or check?
Make it $200,000
and you got a deal.

What's with
the additional $100,000?

Pain and suffering.
Deal. Let me see one of
those bad boys.

Wait. Where are his...
Claws?

Yeah.
They're Pacific lobster.
No claws.

Enjoy the pain and suffering.

Okay, sure. Hey.
Hey.

I need a favor.
Favor? That's great.

Last time you asked me
for a favor, it cost me
$1,900 in parking tickets.

You didn't want the police
to boot my beemer, did you?

Your beemer.

No, sweetheart,
of course I didn't.

Did you get
some more tickets?
Yes, but we'll deal
with that later.

I need you to pull someone's
medical records.

That's against the law.
Only technically.

No, there's also a privacy issue.
Details. I need Jay Ross' medical files.

The pimply-faced boyfriend
you had in the ninth grade?
That Jay Ross?

He lost the pimples.
Yeah.

What's the matter
with the kid?
Cancer.

So he says.
Jeez, honey,
I'm sorry to hear that.

Yeah, I was sorry, too,
until I realized
he was probably lying.

Why would somebody lie
about something like that?

If I told you,
you'd kill him quicker
than his cancer ever could.

Delinda said you're the
cheery one.
That was before
my musical act...

decided to become a mime.
Mimes are funny.

Sort of.
My life is over.

Yeah, there's a lot of that
going on.

You know what you need?
A gun, to shoot myself?

You need to karaoke.

No, I don't need to sing.
I need my musical act to sing.

No, you need to
karaoke with me.

Come on, I'm only asking
because I'm dying of cancer.

Yeah, nice try, Jay.
But Delinda told me
you'd say that.

That's because Delinda
didn't believe me.

It's true?
Cross my heart, hope to die.

Double down!

So, Big Willie,
how's everything?
Up $700,000.

Nice.

Sam, I do not like to be
bothered when I'm playing,
especially when I'm winning.

Of course not. I just wanted
to let you know that your
daughter's wedding is set.

The decorations, the flowers,
the pyrotechnics are amazing.

Is Bubl? here?
He's here!

I want Bubl?!
Yeah! So you got him!

However, I am concerned
a little about your
choice in food.

Lobster...

is fine, sir, but...

I may have something that
could make your evening
even more special.

I just got the word
that I can get my hands on...

800 pounds of Kobe beef.

Kobe beef?

The $300-a-pound,
Japanese-raised Kobe beef.

The kind that's massaged
daily by hand,
perfectly marbled...

served with just
a touch of soy.

Sir.

I have to think about it.
Okay, well, you think
about it. No pressure.

I'll be waiting over here.

Hey.

Think he's gonna go for it?
2-to-1 against.

I want... lobster!

Okay.

I want the jet.

Hit me! Yeah!

I'm gonna let you in
on a little secret.

Just when you think you got
everything under control...

something will come along
and throw your plans
for a loop.

Don't I know it.

Hey. I'm so sorry.

I've got no right to complain,
you know,
considering everything.

You know, everyone told me
that once you know
you're dying...

you'll stop sweating
the small stuff.
But they're wrong.

No, it's the small stuff
that makes life worth living.

So you're saying
I should enjoy my failure?

No.

But you shouldn't let it
stop you from singing.

You're kidding.

Karaoke in Vegas
with Venice as a backdrop.

It's pretty cool, huh?
How many people get to
say they did this?

I think we'd be the first.
How did you do all this?

I gave them a note
from my doctor.
Jay, I don't sing.

Karaoke is not about how good
you are, it's about how much
fun you have.

No, you don't understand,
I can't sing in front of
all these people.

It's easy. Just pretend we're
5,000 miles away,
staring at the piazza.

The one without the
5,000-room hotel.

Okay, not a problem.
How is this going to help?

You're never gonna see
these people again.

Do you take requests?
Of course.

Make love to me.

I'm sorry,
but I'm wearing this.

It's not a problem,
as long as you're not wearing
anything else.

Yup. That's right,
1,000 Maine lobster.

I'll be there within the hour.

Craig, you just told me
an hour ago
that you had the lobster.

I know, I'm sorry, Sam.
My shipment didn't come in,
on account of Hurricane Ruth.

It kicked up a wicked swell
as far north as Halifax.

None of the lobstermen
will leave dock.
I don't think
you understand...

the desperate nature of
my situation.
I understand the situation.

I just don't have
any lobster.
We're old friends, right?

If you knew where to get
the lobster, you'd tell me.

Sam.
Yes.

You dumped me.
I was ready to propose.
No, I didn't think
you were serious.

I showed you the ring.
I'll marry you if you give me
1,000 lobsters.

Very funny.
No, I'm serious.
I'm madly in love with you.

I can't live without you,
let's spend the rest of
our lives together.

This is a proposal?
Abso-frigging-lutely.

As long as I get you
the lobster?
Yes.

Sam.
Yes.

Even if I thought you
were serious,
I don't have any lobster.

All right.
No one does.

You blew it again.

How about dinner
and a movie for
500 pounds of Pacific salmon?

Figures.

If you want to go skydiving,
why don't you ask Danny?

He's a Marine. They do that
Superman stuff in their sleep,
right?

Tell Nessa skydiving is
not that dangerous.
It's not.

Unless someone's
shooting at you.
There you go.

It's not the jumping
I'm afraid of.
It's the landing.

That's not a real
healthy way to live.
It is if you want
to live a long time.

I pride myself on
almost rarely, if ever,
trying to kill myself.

You like to go swimming
in the ocean?
Yeah.

Did you know that the ocean
is home to the
great white shark...

one of the most violent,
bloodthirsty predators
on the planet.

And if you get bit by one,
besides the
mind-blowing pain...

your blood actually chums
the water which leads to
a feeding frenzy...

with a whole bunch of
other sharks.

Yeah, it's a long...
Slow...

Painful, painful death.
That's great.

I'm never going in
the ocean again.
Anything else?

No!
All right.

What's your point?
My point is life is
all about risk.

We could die at any moment.
If it's your time to go,
you might as well go quick.

And if you eat it skydiving,
you won't feel a thing.

Mary?
Yeah?

Mary, hi. Excuse me.
Hi.

I hate to bother you
and I don't mean to
seem ungrateful...

but we have these passes,
to the buffet...

Yes, our cooking staff
has marked all vegan dishes
with gold stars...

and two soy entr?es have been
prepared by Gunther,
just for you.

It's amazing.
Larry, don't you
worry about a thing.

The next couple of days,
I will take care of
everything.

We gotta make this quick,
Luis wants us out
in 20 minutes.

Not that I'm being picky,
but isn't this considered
tampering with evidence?

CSI didn't find anything,
so how can it hurt?

I just don't want
a felony seafood conviction
on my record.

Come on.

Why do we got close it?

You gotta keep
this thing a secret.

I promised Ed
we wouldn't show anybody.

A Radiant Spectrometer!
I just read an article about
this in Theoretical Science.

Yes. By lacing radioactive
isotopes into
a laser matrix...

it can retrieve
material residue...

from surface strata
for up to three days
after contact...

even if cleaned by
phosphate-based cleaners.

So, we can dust for prints
that aren't there?
Right.

Why don't you just say that?

The only downside is
if you're exposed to
the radiation...

your nads will glow green
for two months.

Check this out.

Now, I agree with you
that mime...

is poised to come back
in a big way.

I'm just not sure that
you're the guy to
bring it back.

Mary, lighten up.
Yeah, but it's
a wedding reception.

And people,
they want to hear you sing.

My voice is my instrument.
Exactly.

Maybe I should show how
versatile my instrument is.

Now you're talking.

You think I'm funny, right?
For a musician,
you're pretty funny.

Good.
Then that's what I'll do.
Stand-up.

Just stand-up.
Stand-up.

Big Willie wants
to hear you sing.

I want to hear you sing.
Then buy one of my CDs.

Okay, the lights dim,
I take the stage.

How many of you hate to fly?
I know I do.

Mr. Nelson?
Yeah. James L. Nelson,
at your service.

You must be
Samantha Jane Marquez.
Yes, I am.

Talking to you on the phone,
I thought you'd be bigger.

Sort of burly, you know?

More facial hair.
Right.

I need some lobster.
Yeah. I know what you need.

The only problem is
I can't deliver
on account of Hurricane Ruth...

And the wicked swell.
Yeah, I heard.
Listen, money's no object.

Okay.

For $1 million...

me and my buddies will go on
out there.

We'll pick you up
some lobster.

So $1,000 a lobster?
And worth every penny.

Money's now an object.
That's too bad.

It was nice meeting you,
Ms. Marquez.
Mr. Nelson?

What if I were to
give you something?

Something that
money can't buy.

Something very valuable.

Yeah!

Pisser!

I'm busy, and you're still
full of crap.

Look, I'm sorry you
don't believe me, but...

I see a white light.

Jackass!

Come on!

How's it going?
Pretty good.

Can't complain. Thanks.

I gotta ask you, does that
whole "I'm dying of cancer"
line really work?

Like a charm.

You okay?
Absolutely wonderful.

Michael Bubl? now wants to be
a stand-up comic.

And?
And he's horrible.

And you're happy because...
I have nothing to feed
my wedding guests...

and my musical act is
no longer musical...

but I'm not sweating
the small stuff.

You were with Jay,
weren't you?
Yeah. How'd you know?

Daddy, I need you to kick Jay
out of the hotel.

Right.

Why don't you sit down
for a second?
I don't want to sit down.

Look, I just got a copy of
Jay's medical records
from his doctor...

so sit down for one second.
Daddy,
I don't want to sit down.

Stop with the "daddy" stuff
and sit down.

I'm sorry.

But Jay is telling the truth.

Sure he is. Remember when he
reassembled the principal's
car on top of the gym?

Are you sure you talked
to his doctor? I mean...

Jay's dying, honey.

Man, you look beat.
Thank you. I've just
crossed the country...

twice, and in 12 hours
I'm throwing a wedding.

So, I figure I have about
three hours to eat, sleep,
and shower...

before I have to be
back to work.

I know what you need.
What's that?

You need to get laid.

You must be
Delinda's friend.
Yes.

Here's the thing, Jocko.
Jay.

Whatever. "Getting laid"
can only lead to
"will you marry me?"

Then I'm going to
have to dump you...
Actually, I'm dying of cancer.

Which means
no long-term commitment,
no emotional aftermath...

and no one's ever going
to know because
"Dead men tell no tales."

So, you're the perfect
one-night stand.
Exactly.

Almost done. Nothing.

I'll run it again, but...

I compared our footprint
with every major shoe
manufacturer in the world.

Not a single match.

Either this guy's
a real pro...

Or the luckiest
son of a bitch in history.

You were right.
That was exactly
what I needed.

Is there any chance
we could cuddle?

Don't ruin the moment.

I don't know about you,
but my brain is fried.

Yeah. After two days
in the surveillance room,

it's nice to...

be outside.
Getting in touch
with the real world.

Nothing more real than

a chlorinated ocean with
a concrete bottom.

No natural predators.
Completely safe.

No natural predators,
completely safe.

I've been talking to
some doctors at UNLV

about experimental
treatments...

gene therapy.
They want to set up

an appointment
for tomorrow afternoon...

for some additional tests.
Don't you think
Jay's been through all this?

Jay will be fine.

I'll make sure of it.

Maybe I should call his doctor
in Houston again?

You know, there were
lots of times when...

we just didn't think
we'd ever make it home.

And no matter what we did,
we were not going to make it.

This is different.
No.

No, it's not. Not really,
because when you reach
that point...

you know, you can fight...

you can cry, you can pray.

But ultimately,
you have to accept
what happens.

Yeah, but he's not fighting.
He's on vacation.

We all fight
in different ways, you know?

So you're telling me
just to give up?
No, I didn't say that.

I didn't say that at all.
I'm saying...

you...

say your goodbyes,
and you make your peace.

How about you?
Did you ever have to
make your peace?

I just, you know...
I didn't have to.

I had something
a lot stronger.

I had this little girl
back home who needed me.

Just made me feel like
I was bulletproof.

I love you.

You want to sit with me
for a little while?
We can talk about it?

No?

You're a mess.

I know.

Ed?
Yo.

We checked the shoe tread
with every shoe manufacturer
in the database.

But we never checked the print
against specialty lines.

Specialty? Vegan shoes?

I'll order you a pair
if you're interested.

No. I don't believe in
walking on vegetables.

Got a match.
Where are these
veg-heads now?

They're meeting in Bella Sera.

Yo, Larry?

Where are my lobsters?

What are those for?

Pain pills. I'd offer you one,
but in two minutes...

you'd be passed out
and your head would be
in a puddle of your own drool.

Look, I want to apologize.
For what?

For not listening,
not believing.
Happens all the time.

I have to admit, it's the most
original come-on line
I've ever heard.

You'd be surprised
how well it works.

Come on.

Why didn't you stay
in the hospital?

My body "failed to respond to
any accepted
therapeutic modalities."

And they could only promise me
a few extra weeks than
I already had.

So where are you going to go
after Vegas?
I don't know.

Vegas was the end of
my to-do list.

The last time
the doctors checked,

the cancer was
pretty much everywhere.

I guess that's kind of weird,
actually.

I mean, outside I look okay,
but on the inside,
I'm pretty much a mess.

You're going to go back
into the hospital?
No.

I don't want to spend
my last few days
on a hospital bed...

with a tube down my throat,
all pumped up on morphine.

Part of how you live
is how you die,

and that's definitely
not for me.

Besides, I still have
two unfinished items
on my list...

and one of them
is skydiving.

I have compared every woman
I've ever met to you.

Jay, we were
in the ninth grade.
You were my first love.

I'll think about it.

You better think quick.
It's a limited-time offer.

Jay...
Dee...

you're my dying wish.

You're in a lot of trouble,
Larry. Felony robbery.
Grand theft, auto...

well, technically
grand theft truck.

I can't tell you
where they are.

Even if you put them on ice,
they're not going
to last much longer.

They'll be fine.
Why'd you do it?

Why?
Yeah.

Las Vegas is like
the Killing Fields.

200,000 new people a day...

satisfying their bloodlust...

by gnawing on the flesh
of fried, and baked,
and broiled...

and grilled animals.
And does anyone
even blink an eye? No.

Instead, they pay homage to...

Vegas' Murderer's Row:
Emeril, Wolfgang Puck,
Gunther...

and Bobby Flay.

When I got word that
the Montecito was going
to put to death...

1,000 lobster
right under my nose, I knew...

that it was a call to action.

Have you ever heard
a lobster scream?
Personally, no.

But I have dipped their tails
in warm butter.
And it's quite tasty.

Murderer.

Where are
my lobsters, Larry?
I can't tell you.

You know, Larry,
where you're going,
I have a feeling...

that they're gonna make
a meat-eater out of you.

I'll see you later guys.

They're safe.
That's all that matters.

Yeah, I know his list:
Singing, skydiving, sunrise.

Jay thought I might be able to
help him with another one.

That's good. Tying up
loose ends is
an important part of dying.

Yeah.

It's this particular loose end
that has me
a little concerned.

He's didn't ask you
to do anything illegal,
did he?

No, of course not.
Good.

Because that's where
I would draw the line.
Any other lines?

He asked you
to sleep with him, didn't he?

He's been in love with me
since the ninth grade.
I'm his dying wish.

How'd you know?

Apparently, he's got
a lot of dying wishes...

because he also asked me...

and Sam...

and Nessa
to sleep with him, too.

You're leaving?
I'm going skydiving.

So, have you
made your decision?

I've given it
a lot of thought.
And the answer is no.

But don't you want
to know why?
Not particularly.

You keep telling me
how much you love me,

how much you want to
sleep with me.

I do.
But you never
once asked me...

how I felt about you.

You were my best friend.
Friends do anything
for each other, right?

Yeah, but don't you think
a going-away lay
would change what we had?

And cheapen it?

I don't want to get laid.

I want to make love
to the most beautiful woman
in the world.

Is that what you said
to Sam, Mary, and Nessa?

I don't know,
these painkillers really do
a number on my head.

Oh, God.
Oh, God!

All right.

Come on. Just hear me out.

I'm dying, and I'm desperate.

Want to do everything
while I'm still alive.

I just don't want to
die with any regrets.

I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, too.

Delinda, I...

We could always talk.

And I think that's really why
I came here.

I just wanted someone
to talk to...

like we did when we were kids.

If this is just
another line of...
Delinda, I'm scared.

You're not going to break
my nose again, are you?

My first kiss, and my last.

Sam! Come quick.
The wedding was perfect.

And the lobster?
Delicious. So fresh.

Oh, good. You have no idea.

Hit me!

What's Big Willie's
chip count?
Down $600,000
and not a care in the world.

Really?
How do you do it?

We have some new VIPs.

And here they are:
Eight of my most favorite
lobster fishermen

from Harpswell, Maine.

And all you had to do
is comp their stay?

That's not all I had to do.
You didn't.

We're gonna hear
Michael Bubl? sing.

Bubl?!
Bubl?!

They're fans. Go figure.

Whatever happened to the...
I have no idea.

Larry...

this is
Mr. Glenn Schaeffer.

He's CEO of
the Mandalay Group.

He owns this hotel.
And these are my sharks.

It seems that
somebody dumped...

1,000 lobsters
into his million-gallon
aquarium.

Are they okay?
It's not a matter of
the lobsters being okay.

I can't afford to have
my sharks die.

You see, Larry,
everything that goes
into this tank...

including the food,
is screened for bacteria
and disease.

So, what you did here
was endanger Mr. Schaeffer's
sharks.

I didn't know that they were...
It's okay.

We came up with a pretty
great idea, I think.
More my idea.

Okay, Glenn, it was your idea.

"The Mandalay Bay
and the Montecito Resort
bring you...

"Lobsterfest, all you can eat."

Mikey!
Hey, Ed,
you ready for the show?

I'm ready. Sure, I'm ready.
How about you? You ready?

I'm ready. Of course, yeah.

Listen,
how did it go with her?
Did it work out or what?

Oh, man. You were right.
She is the nicest person
on the planet.

She didn't say no
to anything.
The plate. Did you...
The plate?

Eight of them.
I did the mime.
The "Bubl? in a Bubble."

She just laughed at me
from the audience.
Pay up, sucker.

There you go.
This was all a bet?

Yeah, but no.

Listen, we talk a lot,
you know, we talk a lot.

And this one time
I was telling him I know
the coolest, coolest girl.

And he doubted that, because
that's the way he is.
And so we made a bet.

I said, "I'll bet
there's nothing you could do
that would make this girl...

"lose her temper."
And there you go.
I hope it's okay.
I signed it to Jillian.

Sure. She listens
to this thing every day
for three months.

I know the whole act.

How're you?
Good.

Can't wait to see you
after the show.
Good luck.

I believe that is my cue.

He's a great kid.
All this for a CD?

No, he also promised
to come back next summer
during his national tour.

This kid's gonna be huge.
What if you'd lost?

Would have given him
one of my CDs.

Nessa! If your chute
doesn't open...

hold up your left hand!
Why?

In case anybody on the ground
wants your watch.

Oh, ha-ha.

Time to go.
Ready.

Hey!

Thanks for everything.

It's been one hell of a trip.

No!

Jay!

Look, sweetie,
he did everything
he wanted to do.

Apparently everyone
he wanted to do.

You didn't?
Me? No.

You?
No. Of course not. Mary?

He's hot and he's dying.
Of course I did him.

I guess he went out
in style.

How was it?
Fine.

I can't believe he jumped.

I bet he smiled
the whole way down.

I'm guessing there was a point
where he had to quit smiling.

Dad!
I'm sorry. I couldn't...

It's not funny.
I'm sorry.