Land Girls (2009–…): Season 1, Episode 4 - Trekkers - full transcript

The rats undercover of the black-out

and profiting by ruined buildings

are forming the menace of
an enemy within our gates.

If you saw this, you would soon stop it.

But, in effect,

it happens when the rat has already
shared our food in the larder.

If there are rats in your
home or business premises,

please let us know.

We can help you to rout the rat.

361, Fisher, Sir!

Thank you, Corporal.



You are aware of the
charges against you?

And of the severity of the
penalties at my disposal?

Sir.

And yet, after three months, you
still offer no defence or mitigation...

... for deserting your post,
your comrades and my command...

... with the most flagrant and
inexcusable disregard for your obligations,

both to the reputation of this service
and to your country at a time of war?

Corporal.

Well...

a full report's now been compiled
and testimony given against you,

by Home Guard officer who
effected your recapture.

Sergeant Tucker, please
read from your statement.

Seen this?

Solid!



- So when is it?
- It's tomorrow night.

Tell Lady Hoxley I haven't
got any clothes for a party.

No, I think the idea is you'll be
serving the cocktails, not drinking them.

Typical!

We're not here to be her skivvies.

I know, but what with the
Spitfire Fund and all...

She's got all the big nobs coming.

I think it'll be fun.
It'll make a nice change.

Some of us have got other things
to worry about, thanks to you.

Out. Come on, quickly, quick.

All right!

Dennis.

Mrs. Fisher.

What happened then? Is he all right?

Well, don't just stand
there! Tell me. Please.

Well, he was all set for a
Court Martial, as you know.

So?

Flagrant dereliction of
duty. I made that quite plain.

- I'm sure you did!
- Cowardice, is what I call it.

Still, I made them aware of
some extenuating circumstances.

What, that he came back to help you?

When he could've just left you there to
bleed to death in that car. If you like!

He didn't need to save
your neck, didn't he?

He could've run, if he was the
coward you're making him out to be.

I got him off though, didn't I?

He should count himself lucky,

no mistake.

I should've known a bit of
gratitude was too much to ask.

And they're just going
to leave it at that?

I should co-co. They're posting him.

- Active service.
- Where?

Lincolnshire way, I should think.

Rear gunner! Well, what do you expect?

A trip to the ruddy Bahamas?

Joyce?

So d'you think you and Joyce can get on
a bit better, now John's been released?

That would be nice.

How are you feeling? How d'you mean?

Well, all this talk about husbands.

That's all behind me, now.

Gotta make my own way in the world.

You must still miss Harry.

Miss a lot of things. Don't you?

Anyway, you never know who's
going to be at this party of hers.

Might get myself a rich one this time.

Can you imagine that...

a proper toff, setting you
up for life in a big mansion?

Seems strange Finch
taking on all these tramps?

They're trekkers, that's all.

They're just looking for
work, like anyone else.

Except they live in ditches.

Morning, Fred.

- Mr. Kirkham.
- Having a clear out, then?

What brings you to these parts?

All the way from next door?

I hear you've taken on some trekkers.

Who says?

just down the Hare and Hounds, you know.

Better watch 'em.
They're light-fingered.

Hey, you'll never believe this one. And
stop me if this is just beer talk, mind.

But they only reckon you've gone and
put yourself in for the Ministry prize,

for the best kept local farm.

- I mean to say.
- I have, yeah.

Well, the inspectors are
due in a couple of days.

I'm well aware of that
fact, thank you very much.

Then don't you think
you should withdraw?

Never!

Any more than Churchill would.

Well, there was Dunkirk...

It is a model, this place.

Get off, it's a muddle.

You don't stand a chance against us.

I will "fight you in the fields".

In fact, if you'd like
to make a small wager...

You still owe me ten bob from the Cup
Final and they haven't played that in years.

Ay, and while we're on about it, whatever
happened to that seed drill of mine?

We are supposed to share
resources in a time of war.

You've had that since the last one.

Probably here with the
rest of your rubbish.

Farming isn't always pretty, my friend.

I know.

I've just seen your septic tank.

And what about that
slurry pit down the bottom?

Stinks to high heaven.

I will get my Land Girls onto it.

Your chivalry knows no bounds!

Modern, high-yield agriculture,
that's what they're looking for.

Efficiency! Martin.

Hygiene, you...

That man is a menace.

- Kirkham's all right.
- No.

This time he's crossed the line.

From now on, he is the enemy.

Why?

A Jerry without the jackboots.

Hitler with...a bigger moustache.

Das ist good, jah?

Das ist eine coward.

Mr. Kirkham.

Now look what you've done.

It's a rat, it's a rat!

It won't hurt you. Steady on!

Hurry up, lad, we've got one.

You see it?

- Why don't you just kill it?
- What's it ever done to you?

Gotcha!

Good lad.

Now, to the barn.

Did we really have to
be put in with them?

You're more used to high society, eh?

Now then,

there will be a small charge
for your accommodation,

which I'll dock from your wages.

If anybody needs milk or eggs,

I'm sure we can come
to some arrangement.

Careful. He'll probably
charge you for them an' all.

You what?

They're for her, if you must know.

Come on, tea's up.

Yeah, but surely if you saw
a rat you'd just kill it.

He's probably charging it rent.

And he's cleared out the barn, as well.

At least he's getting rid of the things.

Even Finch wouldn't let people
stay in an infested barn.

Some of them look a
bit infested themselves.

Erm! Well, they do!

Well, it's not just
for the trekkers' sake.

- There's a competition going.
- Really?

Oh, aye, twenty quid
for the best-kept farm.

He's up against Kirkham's, next door.

- He's got no chance!
- They'll win by a mile.

Especially with that
bunch of fleabags about.

- Bea!
- Right,

- we've got these, they're going to the Manor.
- Oh, I'll go.

Stretch my legs.

I'll say!

I brought you some potato cakes.

We don't want your charity.

I didn't bring them for you.

Oh, um, for the party.

I know. Any excuse.

Yes, I think in the kitchen.

- Yes.
- Thanks.

She's worked like a dog all her life,

bringing up her family,

on nothing half the time.

Two sons in the ground
and a house blown to bits.

What's she ever done
to deserve this, eh?

From Hitler or anybody else.

So what did you do,
before you were bombed out?

A steelworker, like my father.

And has he died, too?

The furnaces did that, not the Germans.

Now I just want some collar, that's all.

Somewhere quiet, where
I can look after her.

Can't you go back to the factories?

Oh, yeah, I could do that.

If I get myself billeted.

But what'll happen to her?

They'll cart her off, won't they?

Why should they?

Listen!

Don't worry, they're ours.
They come over most nights, now.

Don't worry. Don't
fret yourself now, Mum.

No, they're Lancasters.
They won't harm us.

Have you ever heard a
thousand-pound bomb direct hit?

Trapped in a cellar under ten feet
of rubble with three dead neighbours?

It's OK, no, no.

There's a good girl.

Now, come on.

They're ours, they're Lancs.

This is why I had to get
her out of the Rest Centre.

They were talking
about putting her away.

Perhaps she'd be better
off being cared for.

"Cared for".

Have you seen the state of those places?

With half the world
slaughtering each other,

who's gonna give a damn about her?

I'd rather see her in her grave.

I just wish we could
get away from this place.

Go somewhere for a weekend.

Mr. and Mrs. Smith?

I'm sick of creeping
about, skulking in corners.

We've got to face it. Someone's
going to find out, sooner or later.

How? We hardly see each other, as it is.

Lawrence, it's only a matter of time.

- Prehaps I should just leave here.
- Don't say that, darling.

- I've caused enough trouble as it is.
- Don't you dare.

You'll be all right. They send
new Land Girls all the time.

Oh, do you think?

Please...darling.

What the hell was...?

Stop!

Stop, immediately!

Lawrence!

Lawrence!

Lawrence? Well, don't just stand there.

Well,

she'd just like you to help
her get the place ready.

Yeah. Hasn't she got servants for that?

It's better than being
cooped up in here all day.

Well, you've only got yourself
to blame. You keep out of sight.

Morning, Bea.

Just come.

Thank you.

- Hell to pay last night.
- Oh, yeah?

Some of them trekkers
only broke into the Manor.

- They didn't!
- Didn't pinch much,

but Lady Hoxley's up in arms.
Told Dad to get rid of them.

She's got no right.
They're not all to blame.

Try telling her that.

It's not bad news, is it?

No... John wants me to go and
see him tonight, before he leaves.

Well, that's what you wanted.

Might be the last time, though.

No, don't talk like that,
Joyce. He's gonna be all right.

What, a tail-gunner in a bomber?

Yeah, but it doesn't mean...
You know as well as I do.

He'll be lucky to last a month.

Right, how are you gonna get there?

Train, I suppose.

But what about the party?

Now, I'll have you know,
this wasn't my decision.

In fact, it's about the last
thing I would have wanted.

But some stinking, rotten thieves
have brought this on the lot of us.

So, I'm sorry,

but unless someone owns up,

you're all going to have to leave.

Well, it's out of my hands.

You've no-one to blame but yourselves.

Yeah, but what about our money?

You'll be paid in full for
all the work you've done.

Less, of course, the agreed expenses.

What, for a bit of straw?

- Steady on, lads.
- Calm down.

We'll have no argy-bargy, do you hear?

It's for your mum.

Excuse me, what's going on?

You! Yes, you, man, you.

Just ignore him.

You. What have you got there?

What's it got to do with you?

You clumsy oaf.

From the Manor House, no doubt.

You what?

Constable!

- Arrest this man.
- No, it was my breakfast.

- I'll say one thing, you're not fussy.
- You watch your mouth.

Come on, now, lads. No
need for any ructions.

Adam. Adam, come on.

You're nothing but vermin!

Thieves! Scum!

I know you!

Right, the rest of you,
get over there, go on!

You're nothing but vermin!

Clear off!

What's all the fuss about?

- I wouldn't know.
- There's coppers there.

Well, all the more reason for
you to keep out of the way.

- Back to stair up.
- Leave me be!

What if they come in?

Well, what if they do?
I'm not a criminal, am I?

Though I do wonder sometimes!

- Blue murder out there.
- Aye, it's not much better in here.

Hey, there's all sorts
of people outside.

Don't you start.

Well, I'm only telling you.

I don't know why they don't just
lock me up and have done with it!

Oh, Bea!

I'm sorry, Bea.

Are you?

Then get me out of here.

So, I do hope you
don't mind helping out,

but it is all in a good cause

and I must confess, I thought
you'd add a little glamour.

You are such pretty things,
when you're all scrubbed up.

Joyce, you must be feeling
better after your good news?

Tucker did tell me he'd put in a word.

Yes, thank you. And I'm sure

you'd enjoy an evening at the house?

Of course.

Make a change from that
dreary billet at any rate.

Honestly, I don't know
how you girls can stand it.

I'd have gone completely
potty at your age.

- Lady Hoxley?
- Now,

there's the Marquis and
the Willingdons, of course.

Such nice people.

And Gerald from the bank.
The thing is, Lady...

And I've managed to dig
out some cocktail glasses

and there's the silver trays, but they'll
all need a bit of a polish, I'm afraid.

Honestly, it's been such an age
since we had any sort of function.

Feels like a positive scandal.

- I'm very, very sorry...
- Where's Annie?

She's...on her way.

Right. Now...

As luck would have it I did
find some bitters and Vermouth,

but honestly, you just
can't buy an olive for miles.

Come on, keep moving.

Thank you, constable.

What's going on?

Just getting rid of the riff-raff.

Take all your clobber with you!

Are you deaf?

What are you up to?

Has he gone?

What did you run away for, anyway?

I didn't. It was more
of a...tactical retreat.

You know, like Dunkirk.

The thing is, lad,

I'm trying to make a living here

and give a hand to those
less fortunate than myself.

Help feed the world in
its hour of darkest peril.

Come on, lad, and bring that with you.

Look lively.

Where we going?

Mum, we've got to go.

She's not well enough, I
can't move her like this.

I'll get the doctor from the village.

How am I supposed to pay for him?

I'll speak to him.

And what about the
Bobbies? They'll be back.

They'll take me away and cart
her off. How will I ever find her?

I'll speak to someone, I promise.
Just wait here for me. Please.

Annie, listen...

I'll be back, as soon as I can.

Marvellous.

It'll be just like the Cafe de Paris,

before those wretched Germans
flattened it, of course.

Lady Hoxley...

Now they're bound to need
tacking here and there.

I have to go up to Loughborough
to see John, tonight.

Really?

He's leaving tomorrow.

Well, we'll be finished by eight.

You can take the Lagonda after that.

But I can't drive.

No, but Nancy can, can't you, dear?

And I'm sure she'd be happy to help.

Oh, Annie, at last!

Now, I thought you could
take care of His Grace.

He's rather partial
to a Singapore Sling.

Lady Hoxley, about the trekkers...

We've dealt with those.

You girls have nothing to fear.

Well, no, that's not the point.

In fact, I've told Tucker
to take the dogs out

tonight see off any stragglers.

Honestly, one can't be too
careful with people like that.

Beastly creatures!

Now, I had some little aprons somewhere.

Thanks, Billy.

It's been driving me barmy,

having to feel so guilty all the time.

I mean, I know I'm up the spout,
but I'm not Lord ruddy Haw-Haw!

Come on, I want to show you something.

See that?

Our family tree, that is.

Mum and Dad were having
a picnic under it when...

he asked her to marry him.

Thought I'd introduce you.

You hungry?

No, you need it more than I...

Take it, will you?

Big, strong chap like you?

You're too good to me, you are.

This all belongs to Kirkham.

Funny old tyke, he is.

He likes a jar, but he keeps a
good farm, I'll give him that.

What d'you think they put
in it anyway, meat paste?

It's probably Hitler's secret weapon!

- What is it?
- That's Dad!

What's he up to?

So, where's the doctor, then?

Stowbridge.

- Well, can't Finch take you?
- I can't find him!

She can stick her rotten party.

I'm just gonna go anyway. I'm
sick of being ordered about.

Look, I'll take you. Like she said.

Sorry?

You'll be there by nine.

Are you sure?

Yeah, of course.

It'll be fun in that old bus of
hers. Bet it goes like the clappers.

Oh, and we can get some
nibbles for the journey.

And some gin!

Thanks, Nancy.

What is he doing?

Come on, get a move on!

How much is this prize, then?

I told you. A tenner.

And what am I getting?

We have to win it first. Hurry up!

Come on, my beauties!
He's gonna do his nut!

It's the rats!

That's it. Shake it.
There we go, that's it.

There we are.

Stop that one.

It's got me leg!

It's got me leg!

- Look at him go!
- Serves him right.

It'll bite me!

Do meself a mischief!

Yes, the Spitfire fund has
been going marvellously.

Ellen has been working
quite, erm, quite tirelessly.

Two more Highballs, please, Joyce.

Of course, we owe it
all to the Spitfire.

Yes! Stroke of luck, huh?

Good old Leslie Howard!

He showed 'em!

Yes, but it does still
have to be paid for, Gerald.

- More canapes, I think?
- Oh, thank you.

Come on, Mum.

Get some sleep.

This Italian says, "Just a moment.

"How do we find reverse?!"

Isn't he priceless? That's the
spirit, hey, Larry? Safety first!

- Legenda n?o traduzida -

I'll have you know, my husband
has an impeccable service record.

A service...!

I'm glad to hear it.

Decorated in the First War.

Like my maiden aunt's parlour!

At Ypres. Er, Paschendale, actually.

Such a beautiful name, I always think,

- for such a...
- Such a living nightmare.

You can't just leave
us hanging, old chap.

I wounded my leg. That's about it.

Leading an advance
against the enemy guns.

What, over the top and all that?!

I am glad you find it amusing.

Darling...

Shrapnel, then?

Well, what else?

So brave.

Rotten luck to be missing
out now, though...I'd imagine.

What exactly is your contribution, Maidment?

About 15 guineas, so far, Lawrence.

So don't start any nonsense.

Tell me, my dear. Where
did you find an olive?

Stuffy in there.

What, the room or the people?

Listen.

Ellen is going with the Willingdons,
some christening or other.

We'll have the house to
ourselves... All night.

I'll get rid of the servants
- give them Sunday morning off.

What could be more perfect?

- Oh, darling, I can't.
- Why on earth not?

I promised Joyce I'd...

Nancy, Nancy, this is
all we've talked about.

We deserve this.

A little...

A little dignity for once.

Some time to ourselves.

We can wake up together.

Your wife.

Er...you'd better come.

What the devil's going on?

It's just the Home Guard.

We've had rather a problem
with vagrants, I'm afraid.

Of course, one doesn't
want to shoot these people.

But if they simply won't go away...

Stop! Or I'll fire!

Well, now you know.

Oh, I know it, all right.

I know you're angry with me about
John. I should've kept quiet.

Sorry. But please don't
say anything about this.

As long as I get to see him, that's all.

Well, the thing is, I...I can't.

What do you mean?

Well, I can't drive you there.
Lord Hoxley won't let me.

No, you promised. Well,

he says it's not safe, in the blackout.

Don't give me that!

You just do as I say.

- What?
- Well, boot's on the other foot now, isn't it?

One word from me and you'd be
out on your ear. Him, as well.

- Serve you both right, carrying on.
- You're blackmailing me now?

Call it what you like.
I want to see my husband.

And I guess it doesn't
matter what I want?

You gave me your word.

You've got half an hour.

No! Joyce, I'm not gonna take you.

Yes, you will.

Oh, Annie, I've got a huge favour to...

Where are you going?

< Nancy, dear? We're waiting!

Fancy nobbling Kirkham's barn!

'Ere, it were nearly him who
got nobbled. Good and proper!

Wonder what the party's like?

Well, that can't be
them already, surely?

Evening. Billy, you've
been told to knock.

I brought this. For Bea.

I made it myself, I did.

This past month or two.

Billy! That's lovely!

It really is.

Thank you, ever so much.

That's all right.

Now, I'd like a word with you, please.

In private, if you don't mind?

Adam...

Where have you been? It's been hours.

- We've got to get her out.
- Have you seen the state of her?

They're across the field.
They've guns and dogs.

Look at her!

She's not gonna last
the night, at this rate.

What am I supposed to do? I can't
just sit here and watch her die.

There's a doctor at the party.

Trust me.

Well?

Well...I've been thinking. And...

I don't want you having the baby.

It's bit late for that.

Not out of wedlock.

It's a bit late for that, too.

Billy, are you drunk?

Now, I know I haven't done all
that much in life up to now.

Not like you have at any rate, but...

No. Not like I have.

No, I didn't mean that.

Well, what did you mean, then?

Well...

That I think a lot of you.

And... I don't care
about the little 'un.

Well, no, I do care,

because it's yours.

So, I suppose...Bea...

Bea, I'm asking... I'm asking you...

I'm asking you to be my wife.

Bea?

Esther? Esther! Esther...

Well, I was hoping for
more then 15 guineas.

Don't want it all at
once. Might get shot dow...

- Drink?
- Thank you.

Thank you, Nancy.

Larry, old thing. I do hope you
haven't been dipping into the help.

Maidment, old chap.

Do you always have to be such an ass?

Where have you been? She's
been asking after you.

Excuse me. I'm sorry.
Are you Doctor Carlton?

Yes...

They've got the dogs on us now, Mum.

Hunting us down, they are, like animals.

You remember when this all started?

We used to think that some
good was gonna come of it.

"Bring a bit of justice to the
world", that's what you said.

Once and for all.

But nothing's gonna change, is it?

Any more than it did last time.

- Nice and steady.
- Are you all right?

- Where's your truck? Where's it?
- Round the back.

Bea!

Right, we need to get to hospital now.

Well, come on then!

Bea? Finch,

it's too late. She's started.

Come on, let's get her on that chair.

All right, nice and steady.

Thank you, so much.

Well?

You're just gonna have to
ask Annie when she gets back.

- You rotten...!
- Sorry. Really I'm.

But you know this might
be the last chance I get.

Me, too.

That's very sweet of you,
Humphrey. Beyond the call.

Darling, is he always this generous?

Always.

Yes, what is it, dear?

Terribly sorry, Lady Hoxley.

I take it this is about your husband?

no.

No, it's, eh, about yours.

In what regard?

In regard to Nancy Morrell.

Thank you, Joyce. I'll
attend to that later.

Your Grace, you're not leaving already?

All right, men! That'll do!

Stand back!

Right, are you coming out?!

Or are we coming in after ya?!

All right, love.

- Sit her down there, Finch.
- Yep.

There we are.

Slowly. That's it.

- What's going on out there?
- I don't know.

- Go and find Annie.
- Right.

Billy! Billy, wait.

Give me your hand.

All right, slow your breathing down.

There, good girl.

All right, lads! It's coming!

- There's a woman there dying.
- Keep back here.

- Let me through.
- I want those

thieving ditchers out
of here! Keep back!

- What are you're doing?
- Keep away!

That's my barn!

- We told you to get rid of 'em!
- That's enough!

I told you stand back!

You stand back and get these dogs away!

Off my property, the lot of you!

- I want them out now!
- You'll do as I say, Tucker!

I'll do as your wife says... sir.

Back!

Right, I'm taking you in!

Get out of here.

Get out!

Annie...

Adam.

I'm so sorry.

I'm sorry.

Oh, I can't do it, Esther.

Yes, you can. You're nearly there.

It's just one more try.

- You can do it.
- Come on, Bea, love.

I want you to push hard
for me now, all right?

Come on.

Come on, you're nearly there.

It's coming.

That's it. Come on. Come on, Bea.

Yes!

Yes!

You've got a little boy!

You've got a little boy!

Is everything all right, sir?

Everything's fine. Sorry.

I'll be right with you.

You really must do something about that

damn little swine!

Which little swine is that?

Well, Tucker, of course!

The little man's deranged!

Darling, you do know the
Willingdons are leaving?

But I thought you were going with them?

I thought... Darling, you said...

Excuse me, Lady Hoxley...

- Yes, what is it, girl?
- It's the telephone for you.

See that? It's your Auntie Annie.

Oh, look at his face!

I dunno.

One minute I was all right.
The next, he was halfway here.

You don't know how lucky you are, girl.

Doesn't feel very lucky.

Oh, just look at him!

I'm surprised you
didn't hear her wailing.

I know, you could've
waited a few minutes!

You should've tried telling him that!

If that's Billy, tell
him to get the kettle on.

She should have seen him.
Frightened to death, he was!

He was ever so good, though.

Bless his heart. Oh, Lady Hoxley...

Annie, I've brought some news.

About your husband.

Sorry?

Harold.

They've found him alive.

Not far from Tobruk.

Annie...

He's in hospital now.

They'll send the details in due course.

I just thought you'd
like to know right away.

Yes. Thank you, Lady Hoxley.

Oh, and I asked Lawrence to take Joyce.

Nancy's on her way back.

Well, thank you.

Well, good night, then.

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