LOL - Last One Laughing Spain (2021–…): Season 2, Episode 5 - Un control de aeropuerto, la bella Molly y el regreso de una eliminada - full transcript

LOL
LAST ONE LAUGHING

You!

-I will take this... and...
-Daddy's boy!

Daddy's boy!

Daddy's boy!

-Laughter!
-Laughter!

Going.

Well, all that effort.

All that effort.

And we'll say goodbye to someone.

Who laughed?



I'm here to give you a card.

Red, right?

Let's see.

Daddy's boy!

Two kisses!

-Two kisses.
-Daddy's boy.

Capatonda!

Maccio,

you are officially warned,
and at this time,

you all have a warning.

-Yay!
-We all start from scratch!

Did you know that at LOL

even the slightest grimace

can be worth a warning?



Even the tiniest little half-smile

can earn you a warning.

But...

-But?
-Shall we rewind?

No, that's bad.

Daddy's boy.

Ah! He liked that.

-Max, you are eliminated from LOL.
-No!

No!

-See you in the Control Room.
-It's an honor to be eliminated

-with a kiss from Maccio. It's an honor.
-That's nice.

There was a playful glance.
There was a... a chemistry.

Well, whatever. This is something I have
with everyone. What can I do?

I love you, guys.

Bye, Max, bravo!

Say hi to Fedez and Matano!

Don't leave me!

Oh, he's gone, guys! Finally.

I smiled for joy.
That was a dream, so I'm...

I made it come true, I'm good.

Double card. Yellow for Maccio

and red for Max.

All the other contestants
are at risk of elimination.

-Max!
-My gosh!

Well done!

-Well done. You've been amazing.
-Look, it was...

May I? It's his.
Better ask. Maybe it's up in...

Wow! Way to go!

Thanks!

-Shall we begin? Go, Fede.
-Let's begin.

LOL - Last One Laughing.

-I'd say hi to your grandmother.
-Let's see.

You’ll like this one, look.

-I ate a sandwich.
-Yes?

But something stuck in my teeth. Sorry...

How long was that in there?

How long?

How long?

Oh, my God.
This thing would have killed me.

Very nice.

You amazed us.

I'll give this one to...

Grandma.

Guys!

I’m doing it.

-Wow!
-Oh, God, my back, wait.

No.

Are you dumb or what?

What kind of show is this?

Contestants, only two hours
left in the game.

Watch out.

What is it?

It's the little mermaid!

I don't even know if she can breathe
out of the water.

My fins flipped out, guys, really.

I just broke up

with my ex,

a surfer. He ran over me
with his board, but whatever...

So we broke up.

That's it, I could hardly breathe. Well,
I'm underwater, there's no air there.

And nothing,
I couldn’t sink any lower, guys.

I don't know if I should call him back.

Why not?
Sometimes swimming against the tide...

-I need to get some water.
-Let's bring her there.

Should we throw her overboard?

I figured I'm a little bit
of a mermaid too, but in reverse,

with lady legs and the face of a trout.

Wait.

A little water on her.

Here, because this is the...

-Then you overdo it.
-scaly part.

No, I'm not overdoing it.

Don't overdo it,
we need this for cocktails.

Like this, see? A little bit.

Thanks.

-What do you eat?
-Seaweed?

Every now and then a bit of shrimp too.

-Oh, that's fine.
-I once ate one I knew as well.

No, there's actually a guy I like.

He took me to the restaurant,
an awesome three-star seafood place.

But I'm not one of those
who gets influenced by that.

He seems nice, he's a pacifist,
meaning he lives in the Pacific Ocean.

Yes, I know.

Puns make me...

It hurt him!

No pun intended because she really is
a mermaid and he is in the Pacific.

How do you guys have sex?

-My gosh!
-You have a fixation!

Where is your... lady garden?

Oh, come on!

We don't have a garden.

-You don't?
-We don't.

You add the greens later in cooking.

That's a nice one, Corrado.

I broke my molars holding it in.

I still didn't get it.

-I didn't get it.
-Where is your... lady garden?

You add the greens later in cooking.

-Will you spice it up, Fede? Go.
-Yes.

A song for you.

Sing a song made up by you.

Please, Diana, Forest and Corrado,
get ready, thank you.

Now the duel begins.
We're in for a wild ride.

Hi! Hi, guy.

Few people know that I started my career

as an official Elvis Presley look-alike,
in Nicosia.

I also know that in America,
they call Elvis

the Forest of Memphis.

By popular demand,
I will sing "Love Me Tender",

which in Italian means "wash my curtains."

-It's self...
-In fact, here the spleen...

It's self-harm.

Love me tender
Love me sweet

Never let me go...

-You look better this way.
-He's even dressed like Elvis.

You have made my life complete

Why the finger on the nose? The finger
on the nose makes his voice electronic.

Love me tender
Love me true

All my dreams fulfill

For my darling

It seems like Crime Watch.

That's nice, huh?

And I always will

-She laughed!
-She laughed!

-She laughed.
-No! Tess laughed!

Really? Someone laughed?

Duh.

-But now the game has stopped.
-Stopped.

Poetry from Nicosia.

-I'm going.
-First red card?

-No.
-What the fuck are you saying?

Yes, that's right.

You really have...

No, it's because I never turn around.

Someone got lost in a glass of water?

Well...

Let's watch the replay.

It seems like Crime Watch.

Beautiful.

We could not see anything.

Tess, unfortunately
you are eliminated from LOL.

But she can't leave.

Frank!

Yeah!

Come give me a hand!

Coming!

Fedez, are you also here to propose
a duet to me?

Gladly.

You are Orietta's age, you could.

That's right, we could do a...

Are you taking me this way?

Then if you have a slice left over,
we are here, okay?

-Forest!
-For 12.

Guys, focus, because this is
the hardest part, mind you.

This experience is surreal, really.
I still have to process.

-We can go. Yes.
-Shall we?

Even the siren couldn't resist.
It's a red card for Tess Masazza.

My gosh.

Hi.

-Welcome.
-Good evening.

-Shall we restart? It's all yours.
-Green button! Can I press it?

-Want some more smoke, Max?
-Careful, you could get arrested.

"Want some more smoke, Max?"

Let's restart
with LOL - Last One Laughing.

-What a beautiful sound.
-Do my impression.

-Do my impression.
-Do my impression.

-Is that a Maccio impression?
-Et voilà.

-Is it Diana's turn?
-She has to sing.

Hello, my name is Camilla

I love flowers, unicorns...

-It's funny.
-It's very funny.

It's very funny.

Hi, my name is Francesca

I love Metallica, death
And I'm a little depressed

Hi, my name is Samantha

I love clubs, heels, and...
The seagulls

My multiple personalities

They are cool, cool, cool

Do you have a soda?

I can be anything
In one day

In one day

I can be a bit daring

Or I'll take you and break you in three

I can play in a rock band...

-Gentlemen, give something for the girl.
-I'll give you the shoe.

A little something.

Alice's shoe.

That young lady who is so good.

-Laughter.
-Laughter, red!

-She is so good, come on.
-Guys...

-Going.
-Go, Fede!

-Somebody laughed.
-Did I make you laugh?

But did you get it was a song
about multiple personalities?

-Sure. What the...
-Everything was there.

-There was the gap between...
-Except for comedy.

Who is it?

-I wanted to experience the thrill of it.
-Fuck!

-Well, nice.
-Yikes.

Well, you got it,
from now on it's gonna be...

Fucking hard.

Right.

Eliminations.

You're a bad person, in any case.

Let's watch.

Or be like me
Me, me, me, me...

Gentlemen, give something for the girl.

Yikes.

Whatever, okay.

Diana, I'm sorry.
You are eliminated from LOL.

It's okay.

Thank you so much!

Thank you for the emotions you gave us.

-Put Fedez back.
-See you at the next one.

-Come back, Fedez!
-Come back!

Or not.

-Bye!
-Bye, Diana.

Bye. Say hello to Angioni!

Tell him we're great here without him.

-My wife too!
-Say hi to his wife, too!

Finally, now I can relax,
I can laugh. Oh, my!

How wonderful to be able to laugh.

Diana couldn't resist
during her performance.

With this elimination,
six people remain in the competition.

Olé!

-This is a welcome.
-Bravo, Diana.

-Did you have a good time?
-A lot.

-It's exhausting, though.
-It's tough.

-I mean, after a while...
-You don't know what...

Yeah, sure.

-How wonderful, Diana.
-Hi, guys.

It was a beautiful experience, Diana.

What...

-Did you want me to hug you?
-Yes.

Sorry, I'm a little cold.

Oh.

-The game restarts.
-Let's go.

There.

Oh, guys.

Nice smell, this salmon.

-It's Tess.
-Don't insult me.

Yesterday the magician and I made love.
Did you know that?

-Did we make love?
-We made love.

-Don't you remember?
-I don't.

It was me, you and Gino Paoli.

-No, oh, my!
-Ms. Vanoni.

-It's true.
-Gino was there?

There was also Gino
on the Caterpillar ride, remember?

-On the Caterpillar ride?
-"On the Caterpillar ride?"

We entered the apple,
then I saw the caterpillar.

Do you do drugs?

Me?

There are only two options,
either you don't laugh anymore

or you explode.

But they are so hap...

These buttons!

Nice, Fede.

It was very nice.

-There!
-Oh, my goodness, help.

Well, see you!

-See you!
-I knew it.

When the curtain opened
and I saw Corrado Guzzanti at the piano

doing Venditti, I said,
"This will be the death of me."

Xa, Xa, night before exa'

"Night before exa'."

Someone protect Virginia Raffaele.

Yeah, Virginia is going to give in.

Look at Maccio!

It's the best of Venditti.

What a moment!

-Bravo, Antonello!
-Beautiful!

Bravo, Antonello.

Great, Antonello!

-Maccio was this close
-Maccio was in difficulty.

These technicians are very good,
those who do the movements, uh?

I am director.

Very good.

-Is he at it again?
-He's at it again.

A little lack of affection and so...

What happened?

You missed Antonello Venditti.

But not the real one.

Yes, Antonello Venditti was here.

"You missed Antonello Venditti."

Have you thought about...
I know that's a bad thing to say.

Do I have to cut my leg off? Come on.

Look, I also have the microphone of...

This one is awesome.

Guys! Guys, we have an interview to do.

-Yes. go.
-I have Virginia Daniele here.

Good evening, everyone.

I had a great time.

-There it is! Red!
-There it is!

No, who laughed?

Let's see, let's repeat what we did.

Oh, he's making his own slow motion.

-Let's go.
-It has to be done.

Here he is.

The next eliminated has been
his own enemy for the entire race.

Hara-kiri-style elimination.

Hara-kiri?

You even looked into the camera.

No, I'm not leaving. I'm sorry.

Forest, it's a hard elimination,
but it's your elimination from LOL, sorry.

I’ll chain myself here
and I'm not leaving, guys.

-No, I'll tie you up here.
-It wasn't me.

It wasn't me. Sorry.

It wasn't me,

it was a doppelganger.

-Later.
-Bye.

Well, I'm going. Bye, guys!

-Bye, Mago.
-I miss you already.

If I give you 50 euros,
will you give me a bit?

All right. I'll give you these.

You put these in your mouth,

-and pull that. This is nice.
-Thanks.

I'll do this one with you in mind. Thanks.

You can't fool me.

-You didn't put them in your mouth?
-No.

No, Forest took it badly.

With his stool!

He sold his latest bit.

Now you have to call
a locksmith to try to...

get me unchained.

Well, I'm going to go cry for a minute...

in the bathroom,
since I haven't gone in four hours.

It's self-elimination.
Forest must reach the Control Room

while only half of the contestants remain.

Darn it, guys.

-Forest!
-So sad.

-I've self-eliminated.
-You've self-eliminated.

You still have the stool?

-I chained myself.
-Do you have the keys?

No, unfortunately.

These are the winter ones,
because they have the plush.

Don't you ever stop?

If you catch a cold on your wrists,
it's awful.

Whatever. Hi, honey.

LOL - Last One Laughing restarts.

In Forest's honor.

Nice.

She can't do it.

Looks like you have dentures.

I sold her a bit, but she couldn't do it.

-I would use...
-The secret weapon.

-Lillo.
-Not secret anymore.

-Here I am.
-Look, Lillo.

I've got a big craving for mambo.

-I'm going, I'll try, bye.
-Go, Lillo.

Maccio is putting hair on.

Moppo Capatonda.

-Moppo Capatonda.
-Moppo Capatonda.

-Guys.
-There is a change in vibe.

Virginia.

-Here we are.
-Virginia.

-Here's Lillo.
-Lillo has arrived.

Virginia.

"Virginia."

I said, "Who the fuck is it now?"

Damn you, why do you call me
in secret like that?

Come.

-Virginia is already in pain.
-She looked at him.

Can you give me a drum roll?

Ladies and gentleman,

it is a great honor for me

to present
tonight's world premiere at LOL...

The greatest mambo screamer!
A round of applause, thank you!

No, come on.

All right...

Oh, my God.

I could die.

I could die.

Gentlemen, here he is, applause!

Here he is.

For a moment, I said

the mambo king and Posaman
are the same person.

Then I said, "No, that's impossible."

Very good.

Thank you!

Relax. Corrado.

-How is it?
-Oh, that's nice.

-Do you feel I'm a bit strung out?
-A bit.

It's not from this year.

-No, this is from 1992.
-At least 20 years ago.

My comedy is fundamentally
about deconstructing

media languages,

everything I've absorbed over the years,

about issues.

I wanted to recommend some readings
since no one reads anymore.

This one is very nice,
Learn to Walk in a Few Simple Steps.

"Nowadays, moving around
by using your legs is very useful.

Crawling is not always possible.
The author will lead you to be bipedal

and then to show off an enviable pace
as well. You can go places, in short."

This one is very good.

How to Gain Weight in a Few Simple Meals.

This is in full Maccio style.

-This one too...
-I wrote this one.

-Is it yours?
-Yes.

Under a pseudonym.

This one is very popular in America.

He changes the font
to match the style of the book.

That's nice.

But one of the best is
Why We Shit by Edward Stool.

Well, Stool is super famous.

"Considered by many to be a vile,
disgusting, repulsive activity

to be kept hidden from view,

evacuation is actually vital to our bodies
and saves our lives every day."

The poop.

Yes.

"You will go on an immersive journey

into the world of defecation

that will lead you to reevaluate it
and even want to flaunt it in public."

Why We Shit.

Enough! "Why we shit?"

Last but not least, The Basin.

Nice, it's a classic.

Nice, it's a novel.

"How to fill it, to empty it,
where to keep it."

Oh, it's a manual.

This is my favorite.

"With The Basin, Renato Rana Marziana

takes the topic head-on
without discounting anyone

and lists all the fabulous uses
of this renowned bowl."

"Renowned bowl!"

In short, reading this book could change
your home life.

-It's 180 pages.
-The Basin. Mimmo Publishing.

It's the same of Why We Shit, right?

These are all Mimmo Publishing.

This is the best one.

Unbelievable.

I wanted to ask you one thing.
How did you prepare to come here?

If you've been working out...

Working out?

No, I don't know.
I actually prepared on a lot of things.

The only thing I couldn't prepare for

was actually the beautician.

I couldn't find a free slot
the whole week.

-Oh, my.
-Bastard.

Wow.

That's beautiful.
I like the fur. I really have it.

Here, I have hair, I like it, really.

Look how wonderful this is.
Is it wonderful or not?

Do you realize?

-Hairy Belén!
-Hairy Belén!

Can you believe it? This is terrible.

It's horrible. Look.

-Look how nicely we match.
-You have more hair than me.

It's a drama for Maria.

Oh, fuck off!

-You didn't know about that either?
-No.

Damn you.

Whatever.

Can you get a wax now?

I also have a tool here.

-Wow, but this is great!
-Yes.

I'm about to shave her,

but instead then I say, "No..."

-No, wait. I wanted to try...
-It's a terrible moment.

No!

No!

No!

No!

Oh, my God!

I had a similar bit. I wanted to cut off
my mustache and come out and say,

"Guys, where's my mustache?
It was right under my nose."

Boy, it shaves well. Check it out.

So gross!

It's gonna be a lot harder for him
to find a woman now.

I don't think I look bad
with the middle parting.

It's still me.

You ruined a sex dream I had.

-Red, sensational!
-Laughter!

Who?

Who laughed? Did I?

-Who laughed?
-I don't know. I'm afraid I smirked.

Going.

-Go, Fede!
-Go.

Ouch.

From the director of The Killer.

But why do you always treat us Neapolitans
like this? I don't understand.

It's an amazing moment.

Do like this.

-The elegance is there.
-I am Roberto!

I am Geppina.

There is suffering in the air.

Have you done dance?

I did dance in remote learning.

It seemed impossible to proclaim a winner,

but in the end, one of you succumbed.