Kojak (1973–1978): Season 1, Episode 11 - Marker to a Dead Bookie - full transcript

Lt. Kojak fails to bring down a wily heroin kingpin, so he ups the ante by putting himself up for sale, pretending he's got no shot at Captain's bars, so he's going for dirty money instead. Theo Kojak's top undercover operative Gil sets up an elaborate scam with the dealers, where the heroin Gil seized from Janis will be traded back to the smugglers, and bags of sugar will be put in their place in the Manhattan South property locker. But Janis connives to switch the deal around, so he has his own personal Theo on the inside, on the take.

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What's happening?
The sailor just threw
the packages in the water.

Now it's gonna take the frogmen
three minutes to get in.

Everybody, uh, get set to follow?
Yeah, everybody's in position.

You see 'em in the water?
Yeah, they're out there.

No!

Where's your eyes, stupid?
Where's your brain?

Look what you did.
You blew the whole radiator!
What happened?

Get this truck out ofhere.
Some truck just backed into Gil's car.

This thing ain't gonna run.

You take care of things here.
I'll call the men.
Right.

What's going on?
The name is Weaver...
Gil Weaver.



Detective, undercover,
Manhattan South.

We're right in the middle
of a drug-surveillance operation.

Now get this truck driver
out of here for me.
Let's move this truck.

There's a tap on
that phone booth, right?
Yeah, we got it.

Yeah?
It's Art, at the pickup.

Who's this? Miami?
I don't know no Miami.

Give me Mr.J.
Mr. J for "Janis."
That's our baby.

Yeah, but who's Miami?
Gil never said anything
about a guy named Miami.

Yeah.

Hmm?

No, don't take a cab.

I'll send a guy over in my car.
Mm-hmm.

Black guy.

He's up from Miami
for the pickup.



Yeah.

You know where they are.
Get over there.

Crocker?
Yeah?

You missed the chance, baby.
Look.

Artie just picked up the horse
from the scuba divers,
whatever you call 'em.

Beautiful.

Kojak here.
Ready to follow.

You Miami?
Yeah.

You're Gigi?
Yeah.

That's a lot of bull.
'Cause I know you.

Gil Weaver, Brooklyn High.
Not me, man.

That's a lot of bull.
You're the heat.

All units! We got a man
in trouble! Move!

Nice going, Alan.

Halt!

You are covered! Swim towards the boat!
Swim towards the boat!

Lieutenant, Art Goodin's dead.

Here, take it.
You're the officer of record.

Eighteen, 20 pounds
pure, uncut heroin.

That's how much Janis
wholesales in a week.

We were supposed to
get it all on tape...
arrival, pickup, delivery to him.

I didn't want just heroin.
I wanted the man.

- Who was that dude
who spotted you from Miami?
- Omar Blake, a guy I went to high school with.

He knew I was gonna be a cop.

One hell of a time
for a class reunion.

Four months.

Four months it takes
for me to work my way in
with Janis, for nothin'.

Lieutenant, Sullivan's sister
speaks Burmese, or whatever it is.

She went to Vassar.
She's gonna interpret
when we question...

the seaman that dumped
the heroin overboard.

What's he gonna tell us
we don't know...
how to make chop suey?

Theo, this is Mr. Waters,
the assistant D.A.
On the prosecution.

Congratulations, Lieutenant.
That heroin's worth
20 million in the street.

- Probably a million wholesale.
- Heroin comes in every day, Waters.

When we getJanis,
that's the time to congratulate us.

What do we got...
two frogmen, a Siamese deckhand...

and a deliveryman from Miami...
what's his name?

Drake?
Blake. Omar Blake.

Would you believe he talked to me
once about joining the force?

He thought it'd be a boss way
to steal a few bucks.

- Where is he now?
- Out on bail.

Out on bail.

He had a lawyer down in two hours.
They posted a 100,000 cash.

- And who's his lawyer?
- Janis's.

Sure. Tell me about it.

I, uh, think...

Get some sleep.

Yeah?

So how is my man this a. M?

Who is this?
Miami, baby.

Just letting you know
that there's no hard feelings.

You know, different strokes
for different folks.

I knew I had something
to do this morning.
Get this number changed.

Hey, hold it, brother.
I mean, don't cut me off like that.

This is the heart line
coming in with some good news.

Yeah. You gonna cop a plea?

Stick it toJanis?
Better news than that, brother.

You want to hear more?

Meet me on our old rooftop,
near the high school.

Bingo.

I don't buy it. He's not gonna
give anything back to us.

He's a cop.
He gets off on it.

He's black, I'm black.

I know everything he don't
get off on, and it's not his salary.

You guys, you fool me.

I don't like that.
He suckered me.

I didn't sucker you.
I saved you.

But I got a rap facing me,
and not you.

A few years.
You'll be compensated.

No way I'm going up,
not without trying this.

I mean, you get your dope back
this way and I beat the rap.

And a lot of dope.
It's a business loss.

You're a business loss.

You want to feel him out?
What can I say?

Get our own dope back from the cops.
Pretty funny, huh?

So where does all
this detectivejive get you?

Huh?

It's not threads.

Smoke?
Yeah.

Of course, you might have
one of them fantastic pads, huh?

Blue lights, quad sound,

deep pile,
squishy fur rugs.

Foxes love that fur.
You got that?

So cool it, baby.
You can have it all.

All you gotta do is
to get that dope back for us.

15,000.

Make it 20.

20,000.
How we gonna pull this off?

The same Gil. You don't listen, man.
You never listen to me.

It's easy.
Okay, okay.

Your lawyer asked
for an evidence hearing
downtown at the court.

Right. And you're the officer
of record, right?

Right, right.
So, you just check the dope out
of the property clerk's office,

bring it down to the courthouse,
show it at the hearing,

take it all back.

Only you switch it
after the hearing.

- Switch it for what?
- Don't play dumb with me, man.

Milk sugar. See?

This is what the property clerk
ends up with...

$20,000.

Nah, this is just yak, man.

Anybody finds out I switched
20 pounds of pure "H" for that sugar,
I go to jail for longer than you.

Nobody handles this besides you.

No way nobody else
can sign for that evidence.

Unless... Unless I was sick...

and the lieutenant
was to okay it.

That's beautiful, right?
Beautiful for him.

He gets $20 million worth
of heroin on the streets
for $20,000, right?

Here. They're gonna think
we're hitting a joint out there.

And what happens?
His lawyer gets ready for trial, right?

He looks for an evidence hearing.
Where the hell are we gonna
send him with the milk sugar?

Why get involved in it at all?
This Miami's facing a stiff rap as it is.

Now look, this is a thin thread
that leads right toJanis.

And if we play our cards right,
that thin thread gets stronger.

We can wrap it around his neck
and strangle him!

We gotta be very careful
about entrapment.
He came to us, didn't he?

It doesn't matter!
We gotta draw
another officer into it...

for your own safety,
for corroboration
in any future trial.

Beautiful! Yeah.

You gotta buy a lieutenant?
Buy him.

You buy a lieutenant,
you get 30 men after him.

We'd all love to get a lieutenant.

Fat city.
Now, you look.

You tell him, lieutenants,
they don't deal with soldiers.

You tell him, lieutenants,
they deal only with the, uh...

with the number-one man...
Mr. Big.

You tell him, lieutenants,
they don't come cheap.

But you tell him,
Lieutenant Kojak, he's up for grabs.

You, Theo?
Janis will never buy it.

I'm gonna make him buy it!

So Maggie told me...
She told me that Lieutenant Kojak
is on the phone.

Maggie's our head nurse.
And I told Maggie,

"I guess I'm some sort of hot suspect
in a case he's working on
or something."

Come on.

Theo, tell me something.

That little black book of yours,
am I in ink or in pencil?

I got you written in ink
and underlined in blood.

Oh, you.
Come on, baby.

I feel like a commercial
coming out of that thing.

Fidelio, how's the action?

It's a sports-crazy nation, Davey.
It's a bookie's golden age.

Meet Mrs. Ortez, my wife.

Celia, Davey.
He works for GeorgeJanis.

Encantada.
She don't speak English.

Oh, no, no.
I just think "encantada"
is prettier than "nice to meet you".

They playing tonight?
They haven't missed
a Friday yet.

Hey, feature that.

It's Kojak, a lieutenant.
He's a real hardnose.

Would you believe this?

He makes a $500 bet
at Yonkers today.

Comes in ninth. He's itching.
He's itching for action.

Bet I could talk him into playing.
You think they'd let him in?

I don't see why not.
Let me go back and check,
all right?

Celia, I gotta go to work.

Talk to the lieutenant's old lady,
if she comes over.

If she feels nervous,
make her feel at ease, okay?
Okay.

Excuse me.

Uh-huh. Why don't you go
over there and have a drink
with Fidelio's wife, huh?

Go ahead.
Be a good girl.

We'll get naughty later.

You ain't hardly ever open.

It's his restaurant, man.

He likes it that way.

He'd rather slit my stomach
than make a deal.

Well, you double-crossed him, man.

Now you're double-crossing the cops.

It comes out even.
He can understand that.

- So, what's happening now?
- Kojak won't deal with a soldier.

I know him better than that.

He'll want assurances
from the man himself.

- But he will deal?
- Maybe.

He's in a funny bag.

Look, promotions to captain.

He figured to be at the top of the list.
Well, he ain't even on the list.

So he mouths off about it.
He says the commissioner's
got something in for him.

He's not getting enough bread.
Well, we're all not getting
enough bread.

But he got Fifth Avenue tastes.

He bought a car yesterday.
Ten grand.

Maybe he's on the take already.
I'll feel him out.
You sound outJanis.

He knows Kojak.
Maybe he'll say, "Call it off."

He's gotta go
to his lieutenant first... Kojak.

Kojak?

No way.

Don't be so sure, Mr. Janis.
I mean, there are considerations.

Like what?

I'm in.

And five.

Call.

You wouldn't hold a race
against me, would you, Kojak?

Um, make your move, baby.

You got a skinny wallet.
I'll raise you 2,000.

Three.

I see.

All right. Hey, listen.
I'm gonna bury you
with this hand, bookie.

- But I'm, uh, gonna need a little help.
- ? Ycuánto?

5,000 balloons.

All right,
I just call your 2,000.

I'll fold. Cards?

Momentito.

What's the matter,
don't you trust me with your pen?

22,000, huh?

Six, five, seven, nine.

No, no, no.
Six, five, seven, five.

Seven, five.
I'm not too bright.

Okay, listen.

I'm really gonna call you.

I want to find out why
Kojak is supposed to be
such a terrific guy.

I tell you...
we've got orderlies
at the hospital...

with better manners
than this guy has got.

You tell Kojak he can
keep his fancy cars,

keep his fancy champagne suppers
because I'm going home.

I'll bet 3,000.

What are you doing,
counting my money? I call.

Ace high, all black.

Time!

What are you doing to me?

Uh, car fare, okay?

You're beautiful.

Nice talking to you.

Hey, Kojak!
Hey, about this marker!
When do you think we do business?

- You did great. Thanks.
- I owed you a favor, for Celia.

Is everything okay?
Uh-huh.

I blew a nice lady for appearances,
folded a full house.

Other than that...

Don't hassle me, Fidelio!

Sorry, sweetheart!

Come on, babe.
Let's go to the Palm Gardens.

$22,000.

- How much does a lieutenant make?
- Twenty grand.

So how smart can you be
at 20 grand a year?

I'll give you five, cash.
Are you kidding?

That marker's signed
from a lieutenant to a bookie!

- Pay me face value. It's yours.
- Give him five grand.

Come on, Janis.
You know it's worth more than that!

Come on.

Miami?
Yeah?

Tell that cop friend of yours
you wanna meet with Kojak.

Tell him we got the marker,
all right?

Meet him at the restaurant
at midnight.

Search him.
Make sure he's not wired.

- Okay.
- If you think I'm in this
for 20 pounds of dope, forget it.

I'm in this because that
lieutenant spooked my operation,
got one of my best men killed.

Sure, we're gonna
get our dope back, for free.

And we're gonna get Kojak too,
in our pocket for as long
as we can use him.

Davey?
Yeah.

Midnight, Kojak will be
at the restaurant.

Now this ain't no alibi,
all right?

Oh, cash in that bookie,
permanently.

Open up.

Check him. We don't
want any radio stations.

Is he clean?
Yeah.

Turn on the lights.

We're closed.

You don't want no radios.
We don't want nobody listening.

Besides, you cost me
a bust, junior.

But we're making it all up
to each other now, right?

I mean, you get your marker back,
plus you get 20,000 G's
to split with him.

This is nice, huh?
Mm-hmm.

Now, you tellJanis
it'll cost him 100,000,
plus the marker.

And as for you, sonny,

you go back to the Okefenokees
and the alligators.

You're not ready for the big time.
I deal with Janis or I don't deal.

My hero.

Solly, pull out a chair
for the lieutenant.

Ah, sorehead.

Thank you.

Did you hear
what I told this yo-yo?
What you say doesn't count.

What I say counts.

I'm not even gonna do business
with you, Kojak.

Miami here is my representative.
He'll handle the details.

Oh, sure, tell me about it.

So he gets the gun,
then he comes after us
and picks up the juice,

and then come back to you
and say we never delivered.

Come on. Oh, no.
Do you picture me doing business
with a cootchie-coo like that?

You are one of 800 lieutenants
on New York's finest.
What's that make you?

Maybe you'll break
out the armor and go south
with the 100 grand.

Or maybe you'll show up with
a bag full ofbaby talcum. Or maybe
you can't even deliver the stuff.

You know what
you're gonna do for me, Kojak?

You're gonna get me a pound
of the stuff so we can test it,

so we'll know
you're not a big bag of wind.

That's five grand for a pound
in good faith.

Hmm?

Well, we got a deal?

It's either now or get off the pot.

Miami's lawyer will call you
about the evidence hearing.

Call these gentlemen
in the morning.
They'll work out the details.

How long on the force, Kojak?

Eighteen years,

without even
a padded expense account.

All my life I dreamed
about nailing fat cats like you.

Instead, I wind up nailing people
who can't help themselves...

prostitutes with veins like rope,

husbands... jealous husbands...
with switchblades for brains.

You know, I got more scars on me
than I can remember.

And stitches? Forget about it.

I wake up at nights
with headaches.

I know all about guys like you,

and those cops with their motels and hotels
down in Florida and California,
leading the good life.

Well, I've served this city for 18 years
like a waiter, and I'm sick of it!

Only this time, baby,
I want a big tip.

I'd go through the hell and pain
of the last 18 years twice a day
to nail a crud likeJanis.

Fidelio.
Davey! Hey!

Have a margarita.
No, no, not now.
I got problems, Fidelio.

I got this broad in the car
around the corner.
She's a Puerto Rican girl.

Now, I stepped out
on my old lady tonight. I figured
I'd spend some time with Maria.

That's her name.

She won't even come in here.
She's crying.

She's trying to tell me
something in Spanish.

Now, we don't talk
too much normally,
but I think this is important.

This word, uh, embarazado,
did she say that?

She could of.
That means, uh...

Come on.
I'll tell you what she wants.
Thank you.

Fidelio, it's right around the corner.
I can't tell you how much
I appreciate this.

Hey, listen. It's okay.

Why are you so nervous?

All right, now which is this?
This is the real thing.
I just signed out for it.

This afternoon I take it
down to the courthouse
for the evidence hearing.

About an hour later probably,
I get out, head back here.

Now Janis could have
somebody watching or tailing,
so we gotta play out the charade.

And then I meet Gil on the way
back from the courthouse.

Now this is the milk sugar Miami
laid on Gil when they first met.

Lieutenant Kojak
will have it in his car.
All right. All right.

So what you're gonna do
is make it look like you put
the milk sugar in Gil's bag...

to return it to the property
department, but in fact,
you keep the milk sugar.

Right. And Gil brings
the real stuff back here
safe and sound.

Now here... This is a pound
of pure heroin left over
from a case that was settled.

It was supposed to go
to Destruction next week.

I give this to Miami...
the pure stuff.

And I give him a peek
at the other 19 pounds
which he thinks is pure.

Well, you can't get a case
against anybody for buying
19 pounds of milk sugar,

so we'll add enough heroin to it later
to bring it up to street grade.

Now that ought to satisfy
all your legal requirements.

But you're still dealing with Miami!

We have to sell
19 pounds toJanis!

We have to videotapeJanis
arriving at the pickup...

to getJanis's voice on tape
discussing the transaction.

And we have to arrestJanis
with the 19 pounds
once you've got the money.

Now, you're still stuck
with Miami.

You're not even close
to dealing with Janis!

Uh, look, uh, Mr. Waters.

I mean, you never hustled
anybody at pool, have you?

It took me 19 racks once
to set up a guy from Detroit.

And you know what happens?
They lose track of the game.

They get involved in personalities.
So we bait the hook with this.

Then we take Miami
out of the picture.

Janis will make the final deal
himself! You'll see!

And you know why?
Because he wants to see my face
when he keeps that marker.

'Cause that's what he wants.
That's what he's gonna do.

He's gonna try to shaft me
all the way!

What marker?

Now I know about the stolen car
you borrowed from the police garage,

and then a phony promotion list,
but what marker?

Uh, a bookie... Fidelio Ortez.

He owed me one. It was a scam.
How can I lose 22,000
playing poker?

You mean to tell me that
there's an I.O.U. Floating around...

from Lieutenant Kojak
to some... some bookie
for 22,000 bucks?

If that shows up in
the wrong places, they can
crucify this department!

Well, Fidelio, he can explain it.
He can be trusted.

- Lieutenant, you asked me to put
a tail on Fidelio this morning?
- Right.

Too late. They just found
his body in Central Park.

Medical says he bought it
around midnight.

I feel sick.

My marker to a bookie
wasn't good enough forJanis.

Had to be a marker
to a dead bookie.

I gotta go see Gil.

One for you and one for me.

And one for you and one for me.

One for you.
One for me. You.

Didn't I see the Marx Brothers
do this once?

What? With heroin?

These are terrific.

This is all right.
Look at this one.

You sure you never did this
professionally, Davey?

Well, my sister's wedding,
I took the pictures.

Her husband,
he let me use his darkroom.

First we get these pictures
and we got his marker
from his former bookie.

We got number-one prime heroin.
First-class shipment.

Miami?
Yeah?

Get in touch with Kojak.
Tell him we got a deal.

Tell him to bring the dope.

You meet him at the restaurant
at 10:30 in the morning.

You guys go with him.

Saperstein, Murphy and Green
will be working as utility men...

by this manhole
halfway down the street.

Tracey and Joe
will be at a window halfway
down the street with sniper rifles.

Now, look.
If anything goes wrong,
we're coming out as hostages,

you just have to use
your own judgment.

Crocker and the technicians will be
in a van right by the restaurant.

Make sure you get a parking space.
I had Cleary get a tow truck
in case we need it.

Beautiful.
And Gil and I will go in together.

He'll be wearing his KEL
transmitter on his thigh.
I'll have this tape recorder.

If anything goes wrong
with the radio, we'll still have
a recording of the whole deal.

You gotta be specific.
You gotta talk about dope,
and you gotta talk about money.

Yes, and if we're
not out in 15 minutes,
just break the door down.

Fifteen minutes?
No way.

If that transmitter craps out
or if it sounds like they found it,

you go in, guns out.
No.

I don't wanna loseJanis
because of a lousy technical problem.

You give us 15 minutes,
even if the radio goes dead.

All right, but be careful.

Everybody understands we're
going after GeorgeJanis himself.

So far he hasn't shown
the least intention of getting
into this transaction personally.

When we take Miami off the scene,
we think it's gonna change.

Sojust go ahead
with all your preparations.
Check in at 7.00 in the morning.

The deal takes place at 10:30.

Let's do it perfect this time.

Thanks, Frank.

Lieutenant?
Yeah?

The desk sergeant tells me
there's a Mrs. Ortez
downstairs waitin' to see ya.

- Fidelio's widow.
- She's not alone.
There's a Miss Gardner.

Ruth Gardner...
a nurse you know.
Are they together?

Yeah.

- All right, give me about five
minutes. Then send them up.
- Okay.

Dumas and Sullivan
ought to be picking up
Mr. Miami right now.

Police. Let me see
your driver's license.
Sure.

Mrs. Ortez, I'm sorry
to hear about your husband.
I'm sure you know that.

Please sit down.

I've, uh, tried calling you
several times.

I've tried not answering.

Here I am.

Would you like coffee
or something?
No, thank you.

Celia and I became friends
the night you and her husband
played poker.

I read about his death
in the paper. I called her.
She wanted to talk to you.

Lieutenant, Fidelio
always told me everything.

He asked me
if he could play that game
that you wanted him to.

I said, "Yes."

That we owed you something.

You could have sent me
to jail once, and you didn't.

I came here to tell you that
I don't hold anything against you
for Fidelio's death.

Fidelio hated pushers.
He hated Janis.

Kojak. What do you mean,
you lost him?

No, don't go over toJanis's.
You'll blow it all up. Get back here!

Bob, Gil!

Miami got away.
Ten-to-one he heads forJanis's.

He doesn't want to blow
this deal tomorrow.

And Janis is gonna sit in
that apartment and let Miami
do it all for him after all.

What do I tell the guys?
If we cancel,
we'll cancel tomorrow.

Don't say a thing.
Now excuse me.

I'm sorry, ladies.
You'll have to excuse me.

Lieutenant, Janis killed
my husband, didn't he?

Well, Mrs. Ortez, it's hard to tell
with people likeJanis.

They have other people doing
their dirty work for 'em.
This Miami person, he did it?

I really can't talk about that now.

Please. Maybe another day.

Yes, maybe another day.

You could have busted Celia
for possession. You didn't.

Well, she wasn't using.
She was just holding it.

You know, like Alcoholics Anonymous,
they hide a bottle?

The other night,
you weren't just being rude
and inconsiderate, were you?

All of that. But look.

When I was being
a hotshot around town,
who'd I have on my arm?

Well, maybe we can try again.

Mm-hmm.

I'd like that.

That's great.
I can see the headlines now.

"Big massive cop stakeout nabs
the Miami connection
for the second time in five days."

Yeah, what is it?

You busted my man, Kojak.
What are you thinking?

I just heard.
It wasn't even my precinct.
Hey, look. He's a new face in town.

They roust new faces down there.
You make sure nobody
picks him up before tomorrow.

Now you listen, Janis.

I got almost 20 pounds
of heroin stashed away
on the outside,

and maybe I've had
enough of you, maybe
I've had enough of New York,

maybe I'll just get on a plane
and go to Puerto Rico or Bermuda
or Bahamas some place.

Don't you think I'll get
more than 100,000 down there?

Hey, hey, you don't
talk to me that way.

You're a lousy crooked cop.

Now you show up tomorrow
just like we planned.

Did you hear his tone of voice,
shouting in my ear?

You could hear it back here,
couldn't ya?

We make sure he doesn't chicken
out on us, take off on us.

Shouting at me on the phone.

You're lucky.
You're gonna see his face
when Davey snaps that flash.

No good.
If Janis isn't gonna be there,
I say we drop the bust.

I'd agree, except for
a couple of reasons.

Mainly because one of
those punks killed Fidelio,

and if we play one against the other,
we might find out which one.

Okay.

Theo.

I know how much
this meant to you and Gil.
We'll getJanis some day.

Oh, sure.
One million fixes later.

I got no hair left,
I've had this tape on and off
so many times this year.

Testing. Testing.
Eighteen, 19, 20 pounds.

It's 9:30.

All right, that's it...
a hundred grand.

It's now a quarter to 10:00.
You're supposed to meet him
at 10:30.

Now you should be back here
with the money by 11:00.

Solly, you know where
to deliver the heroin?
Right.

Okay.
All right, let's go.

All right, enjoy.

Any of you guys Miami?
Yeah, I am.

I'll see you later, all right?

Get her inside!
Get him there.

Davey, get my hat and coat
and meet me downstairs!

Call a doctor, call the cops.
We're in the clear on this one.

It's 10:30.

If you hear us okay, honk once.

It's 10:30.
Are we in business or not?

Just waiting for you, Kojak.
I'll give him the sign.

Oh, that damn neon.

It's Janis!

10:32.

I think we'll bring
the curtain down on this, huh?

Mr. Boss Man himself.

Let's get on with it, Kojak.
Fine with me.

Here, what's this look like?

It looks like the dope
I should have had a week ago.

Here. Feast your eyes on this.

Oh. Oh, wait a minute.
Just a souvenir, Kojak.

Like your marker. Solly.

See? You get nothing, Kojak.
I get everything.

From now on, you're on my payroll.
You're my man on the inside.

You do everything
I tell you to or I bust you
all the way to Sing Sing.

Now why don't you two do
a Laurel and Hardy out ofhere?

And I'll get in touch with you
next time I get a parking ticket.

You villain, you.

Ten more minutes of this? No way.
You hit the horn when I tell you. Go!

I owe you one.

- Hey, that guy's wired!
- All right, hit the horn!

Let's go!

Get that tape out of there.

Now let's get out of here.

All right, hold it!

Or make a wish!
Come on!

All right, get out there.

Halt!

What?

Oh, you need me
to fix a parking ticket.

You try to buy me?

You know something?
For the next 100 years,

the biggest thing you'll ever buy
is a pack of cigarettes.

When I was a kid on
the East Side, we used to
go fishing in the East River...

to see who could catch
the ugliest thing.

Look at me. I got first prize.
I got me a dead East Side gorilla.

Come on.
Hey, don't forget to smile
for the camera, huh?