Klovn (2005–2021): Season 8, Episode 8 - Dr. Strangelove - full transcript
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It's quite a garden.
There's a lot of work to keep up.
- We don't do it.
- I can imagine that.
We sleep out here sometimes. It's nice to
see the stars. Very romantic.
- Do you sleep right on the ground?
- No. We have sleeping pads.
You can feel that after such a night
you're completely charged.
- Do you lie here and sleep without a tent?
- Yes.
- What about the dew?
- Dew is very short-lived.
- You still get wet.
- It's not like raining.
Dew is like that ...
- Amazing what you've made of him.
I can tell you one thing. What Fnug
has shown me about grounding ...
"Stars, what do you say?"
It's the best thing that's happened to me.
- You're not a nature person.
- Look at me.
I'm kind of like Mowgli.
A child of nature.
- A cartoon character at least.
It's good.
I got a call from Bornedal. You recommended
me to the movie club.
- There are many nice members.
- Ole Bornedal started it.
Friends of the Film. Ann Lind who has
reviewed some stuff we've done.
- Anne Linnet? - Ann Lind.
- Who is it?
- Have you never seen morning TV?
There's a ... movie reviewer.
- Just say it. She's Asian.
- Frank ...
- Otherwise we wouldn't watch her.
- Can you say that?
- No. I invited Frank.
- I'll win this year's film.
It's a pretty big honour.
I'll win it. I know a lot about film.
We've got something to tell you.
It's better than hearing it around the town.
- Are you pregnant?
- It's quite serious.
Well...
We've received a request from a girl who is very ill.
Sclerosis. It is an extremely aggressive form.
What she's asked about is ...
She's a big fan of "The Mandrill".
That's nice.
So, before she leaves here,
she wants to be with Casper.
- What?
- She wants a sexual experience.
She's a virgin.
- But, you're married.
- She asked the both of us.
- Did you say yes?
- Obviously.
- Are you going to sleep with her?
- I'll do my bit to help.
And she's a "Mandril" fan?
- Yes.
- That was what triggered her.
It's wild. I'm over 50 and now I
have to take virginity again.
He's so damn lucky.
It's so typical of him.
He always gets these kinds of deals.
- What do you mean?
- He gets to be unfaithful without being scolded.
- Are you jealous?
No, no, no... Well, she didn't call me.
I was also in "Mandrillen".
It could very well have happened.
- It's good that she follows her dream.
It is nice. I don't know
how nice it is of him.
- Would you give your permission?
- I don't think. Or...
It's difficult.
- That's what I mean.
It is difficult.
What's this?
A diaper. Has your mother forgotten that?
- What is it?
- Has she been changing diapers?
Hell, Pykker. There's a whole packet!
- I'm going to text her.
- No, don't do that.
Yes. Otherwise she'll do it again.
Next time she goes ...
Frank, it's mine!
- Is it yours?
- Yes.
Well...
Have you started peeing in your pants?
Sometimes I can't hold on.
So I pee a little.
Well, honey.
Have you gotten that old?
Do you drink too much soda?
No. And you mustn't tell anyone.
No. I wouldn't dream of it.
I promise.
Have you got one on now?
- Hey, Frank.
- Hi, hi. Hi, Ole.
- Asger, Pilou and ... - Martin.
- Ann Lind?
- Yes.
- Shall we start?
- Yes.
Cheers.
- Do I also ...
- Cheers to everyone.
- Now then, Pilou. Over to you.
Thanks so much. I'm very proud of ...
Welcome, Frank. It's fantastic.
It's a Belgian, Flemish, French film from '92.
It's a mockumentary.
- "It Happened Near You."
- It's brilliant.
- It's a candidate for this year's best film.
- Which one is the favorite?
- Mine.
We haven't seen it yet.
And afterwards there'll be a surprise from Holberg no. 19.
My favorite cafe.
Are they the ones who bring olives from Monte Amiata?
Tom drives there himself down through Europe.
I've wanted to taste them for
years, but haven't got round to it.
- Then, here we go.
- Well, how good!
No, man!
Please, just be quiet. Frank.
What the hell are you doing?
- What?
- Stay seated. Light.
- What happened?
Frank has no glasses. He can't see
anything without them.
- I was cleaning them.
- You can't see without glasses.
For your information, we have a rule.
If someone falls out, you have to start over.
When we saw "Apocalypse Now" and you
sniffed, we didn't start again.
It was an at-chu. I stopped the sneeze.
- I would also agree that.
- I can see.
You have to take a test? Take off your glasses.
- Concentrate.
- How many fingers am I holding up?
How many?
- One finger.
- No! There are two!
- They were too close to each other.
- Sit down, Martin.
- Is it back to the beginning?
- Yes.
- Is it with the intro?
- Yes, obviously.
92. It's Flemish. It's Belgian. It's French.
It's a masterpiece.
Do we not agree that it got better?
- Yes.
- If we look into ourselves.
I wasn't ready the first time.
- It was insanely good the second time.
- Where's Martin?
- He's a double creditor.
- Is he still watching?
- He watches the captions twice.
- We have a guest to choose food.
- Should I choose?
- Yes.
I look forward to it.
Choosing what we'll eat.
I have an Indian friend.
He does some super cool things.
- I know him well.
- Special treatment.
- Then you we're ready.
- Olives! Where are they?
- They're right in front of you.
- It's different.
- Pilou.
- There's none here.
- In the bowl.
It's empty. There were two for each.
Mine should have been here.
- I had two.
- Two there.
- Two there. Thor.
- I had one.
You only had one, Ole. You've held back.
Two to Asger. Thor.
No.
There was an extra one. Maybe two extras.
I thought you were gone.
- You thought I was gone?
I didn't realise that you were a
double creditor.
See you.
Martin! You can't leave in the
middle of my masterpiece!
It's not just about you.
Martin hasn't gotten his olives.
I know the movie I want to choose.
- "Dr. Strangelove". Do you know it?
- Yes.
"How I Love to Stop Worrying". No, wait a minute.
"Dr. Strangelove". It has the
subtitle: "How Do I Stop ..."
- "How I Learned to Stop Worrying".
- Take it again.
- Is she 25 and a virgin?
- Yes. I'm not filling you with lies.
Insane. I'd like that too. I was also in "Mandrillen".
Women are turned on by power than by him
who's punched himself in the face.
Many ladies fall for you, but some
prefer a guy like me.
Mia. She absolutely loves you.
It's not completely crazy. You are together.
She has started wearing diapers.
- Diapers.
- For fuck sake. It's disgusting.
- Do you have a picture of her?
- I'm going to see her now.
- Where ...
- Nelly. Do you want to come?
- There she is. She's sitting there.
- Is that her there?
Yes. In the wheelchair.
- Hello.
- Hi there. Nice to meet you.
- You too.
- Hi. My name is Nelly.
- Hi.
- Bolette.
She's my helper.
- Okay. - Excited?
- Yes! You might say.
- Should we have some wine?
- May I choose something for us?
- Yes.
Let's go. See you, Frank.
Yes, hey.
- I didn't know if you knew me.
- Yes, I do.
I was part of that ensemble.
You were also mega-skilled in
the "Mandrill Agreement".
- You noticed.
- Yes. It's hard not to notice.
- I'm not sure if it will go well with Casper.
- That's the deal.
Should something go wrong, feel
free to contact me.
- Okay.
- My wife will need to be there too.
Like Fnug. That's a good way to do it.
I'm very impressed.
My wife is also very positive about it.
- Well, it's Casper I've contacted.
- So that's...
No.
- Here we are.
- It's damn cute in there.
- See you, Frank.
- Yes. I have to go now.
- Hi, Harinder.
- How are you?
- It's good.
- Like that. Nice to see you.
I ordered some takeaway.
And also have a special order to make.
Thursday next week at 12 I would like
to have seven luxury menus.
- Special treat.
- Yes. Special treat. I'll make a note.
Fantastic. How is the boy otherwise? Ankha?
Yes. You remember well.
- Yes. How is he?
- He's very good.
- Did you go to Punjab?
- Two months ago.
- To see the old ones?
- Yes.
- They're fine. Your food is ready.
- Fantastic. You must thank your wife.
- I'll let her know.
- Thanks.
Bye, Henrik.
- No. What did you say?
- Henrik.
No. Frank, right?
It's yours, Henrik. It says on here.
My name is Frank. I've been coming
here for ten years.
- Sorry.
- Do you remember me at all?
- No.
- My name is Frank.
Frank. Good.
See you, Frank.
- What's your name?
- Snøvsen. I'm a snob.
- My name is Alf.
- It's funny.
- What are you watching?
- "Snøvsen".
I love that movie.
- Isn't it a children's film?
- Yes.
- Do you like chewing gum?
- It's so funny.
- Chewing gum!
Now it's coming.
Take this now.
Damn, I have to pee.
- Have you peed?
- Yes.
- Isn't the diaper on?
- No.
Hi.
- Hey?
- What now?
Is there anyone home?
There you are, sit and hide.
It looks cozy.
Hi.
- It looks good.
- We just sat and watched a movie.
- What did you see?
- It doesn't matter.
- Do you sit and watch porn?
- Are you in the middle of something naughty?
- No. We just ate.
- Just some food and a movie.
We have some news.
The film club. Because of the atmosphere last
time, it's with ladies next time.
- We're coming, Mia!
- Are you coming with us?
- And get some drinks?
- So we can create a good atmosphere.
We'd like that.
Mia, I've talked to my mom's
friend about you -
- because she has a clinic down in Switzerland.
- She thinks she can help you.
- Help me?
Yes. She specialises in squat exercises.
If you pee a little now and then,
she is the expert in Europe.
She has videos she can upload.
She also wants to call.
Fnug, I'm in control of it.
- So you no longer pee.
- No, no.
- Then it was a false alarm.
- Did you find out from Casper?
- Yes.
- I said it was a secret!
I wasn't aware of that. We've come to help you.
Yes. You shouldn't be ashamed.
Many older ladies do.
She's ashamed of fucking peeing.
She's just peed in her pants.
- Now?
- Yes. A little bit.
- You can smell it.
- I told you not to say that!
- Don't be sad.
- Don't tell me not... go!
- Where are you going?
- I have to be with Nelly now.
So I have to pull myself together a
little bit. Bye, bye, Mia. Sorry.
It had come out sooner or later, honey.
- Hi, Harinder.
- Hi.
My order must be made for
14 Harinder special offers.
Exactly.
Frank.
- That's right, Harinder.
- Take care.
Hey there. Are you ready to see "Dr. Strangelove"?
"How I Learned to Worry and Love..."
No. "How I Learned..."
- We're staying at home.
- This is my chance to win.
- You'll just have to do it by yourself.
- Why, what's going on?
Casper hasn't been with Nelly as she promised.
- Weren't you up at d'Angleterre?
- She showed up in a hat and glasses.
I lost focus.
- I did the carer instead.
- No.
- Did you do the caregiver?
- Yes.
- There was a big lack of focus.
- And then there's those legs.
- What about Nelly?
- That's it. I nearly fell over.
I take off Nelly's pants and get
confused by the thin legs.
You see her legs, and what happened then?
- I decided to hit the other one.
- Then she's still a virgin.
It's sad. I don't know what's
the right thing to do.
We now have to cleasne you completely.
I can only think, "Out lying on that grass!"
- Yes. At least for a week.
- Minimum!
- I think we should get started.
- Yes. Have you peed?
I was here a lot in the 90's.
I hope you like it.
The last man has arrived. We are gathered
again in Les amis du cinéma -
- which has been extended. These young women
are all characterised by one thing.
They are all 23 years old and they are
writing a doctoral degree in media studies.
Impressive. Good to get some women into
a male-dominated film world.
It's time for them to come in with their
spiritual estrogen.
I thought it was with wives.
It can be, it will be sometime.
You never know.
Mia, you also work with film or what?
- No. - What do you do?
- I have a tea shop.
- And trade?
- She sells olives.
- You can eat them all.
- Shall we move on?
- If I'm not mistaken ...
What did you bring with you?
- Film of the year.
- Arh.
- Yes, I have.
I have to stop you. There's an
Indian down in the basement.
He has food with him and asks for Frans.
- Did he call me Frans?
- Yes.
- Are you sure?
- You can believe it. 110%.
I need to talk to him. I'll be back in a second.
Harinder. You humiliated me!
You call me Frans! Everyone's laughing at me!
I considered ourselves a kind of friends.
A man I could have a nice chat with.
Hey, Frank!
Yeah...
- In other words...
- Now I'm ready.
- Get comfortable.
- It's time to see Frank's film.
But you weren't here, so we had to
ask your wife.
Mia would have chosen the one you
should have shown us.
- But, she couldn't remember Frans's film.
- There was something about "How"...
Yes. We just have "How".
If you don't remember the movie you
want to present to the others -
- we shall be asking for the last
movie you saw at home.
- What was it.
- "Snøvsen".
- Then we will see "Snøvsen".
- My movie is "Dr. Strangelove".
- Which would have been a good offer.
- I have prepared a...
We have chosen for you.
Or, rather, Mia has chosen, "Snøvsen".
- Yes!
- Come on.
- What's your name? - Snøvsen. I'm a snob.
Oops. Every time they try to score,
someone comes and kicks the ball out.
- He destroys everything!
- No.
Oh no. I've had a little mishap.
No, no, honey. You can't go in the
middle of the movie.
- Get out of the way!
- We stay here.
- No.
- Someone has left the hall.
If someone walks, it's the rule of thumb.
It's back from the ground up then.
Why has Mia left? Why the fuck did Mia go?!
What happened?! Come on!
- She's peed in her pants.
- Right now?
There is a small stain.
Number five in... one, two, three, four.
Fifth row number five.
- Kieslowski's seat.
- For God's sake. It's piss.
- She doesn't do it on purpose.
- What a disgusting thing!
Now you stop!!
- How old are you? 60?
- Stop! Stop!
What the hell are you doing?
Then I peed in my pants too.
Throw yourselves at me.
I didn't pee. I didn't.
I just spilled some white wine.
Did you just spill white wine?
- Did you pee?
- Yes. I've peed in my pants.
- It's sad.
- Yes. It's a shame for her.
Hey, Fnug. Good morning.
Well, I'm slipping away now.
But, you must feel good.
Good luck. It'll probably be fine.
- You need to sit down?
- Yes.
We've talked a little, me and Fnug.
There's a little issue with the sclerosis girl.
That's what I have to ask you.
I wonder if you can remedy that and go with her.
- Should I be with her?
- Yes. You were also in the "Mandrill".
If that's what you think needs to be done.
- Max. One hour.
- Yes.
- No oral sex. - No.
- Give her a good ride.
- Yes.
Thanks, honey. It's sweet of you.
Yeah.
- I think we are doing the right thing.
- I think so too.
- Hi there.
- Does Nelly live here?
- Yes.
- Who are you?
- I'm Nelly's carer.
- Have you been with Casper?
No. She's been fired.
Okay. I'd like to talk to Nelly.
- Yes. Nelly.
- I'm coming.
- My name is Mia. I'm Frank's wife.
I've heard it went wrong the
other day with Casper.
We come because we have a
band-aid fix for you.
Yeah... Hi.
We would offer that you could be
with Frank instead.
With Frank?
I'm not interested in that.
Okay.
- Have you arranged anything else?
- No. I already told you that.
Don't you remember it?
- What are you saying?
When we met at the wine bar,
you invited yourself then, too.
I said then I didn't want to.
- No.
- Yes. - No.
We talked about what could happen if
you were not with Casper.
- Nice, but, no thanks.
- Yes. And sorry.
Bye, bye.
You fucking tried to be unfaithful to me!
I have permission. There's just something
wrong with the timing.
- Hello Darling. Can I come in?
- No. I just need the sleeping pad.
What's happening?
You won't get grounded if you lie on top of it.
Sleep tight.
- It's Frank.
- Hi, Frank, it's Ole.
- Hi Ole.
- Congratulations. "Snøvsen" won.
- Has "Snøvsen" won this year's film?
- What ?!
All the girls voted for it.
You won. Congratulations.
It's the end of it now.
The club is closed.
---
It's quite a garden.
There's a lot of work to keep up.
- We don't do it.
- I can imagine that.
We sleep out here sometimes. It's nice to
see the stars. Very romantic.
- Do you sleep right on the ground?
- No. We have sleeping pads.
You can feel that after such a night
you're completely charged.
- Do you lie here and sleep without a tent?
- Yes.
- What about the dew?
- Dew is very short-lived.
- You still get wet.
- It's not like raining.
Dew is like that ...
- Amazing what you've made of him.
I can tell you one thing. What Fnug
has shown me about grounding ...
"Stars, what do you say?"
It's the best thing that's happened to me.
- You're not a nature person.
- Look at me.
I'm kind of like Mowgli.
A child of nature.
- A cartoon character at least.
It's good.
I got a call from Bornedal. You recommended
me to the movie club.
- There are many nice members.
- Ole Bornedal started it.
Friends of the Film. Ann Lind who has
reviewed some stuff we've done.
- Anne Linnet? - Ann Lind.
- Who is it?
- Have you never seen morning TV?
There's a ... movie reviewer.
- Just say it. She's Asian.
- Frank ...
- Otherwise we wouldn't watch her.
- Can you say that?
- No. I invited Frank.
- I'll win this year's film.
It's a pretty big honour.
I'll win it. I know a lot about film.
We've got something to tell you.
It's better than hearing it around the town.
- Are you pregnant?
- It's quite serious.
Well...
We've received a request from a girl who is very ill.
Sclerosis. It is an extremely aggressive form.
What she's asked about is ...
She's a big fan of "The Mandrill".
That's nice.
So, before she leaves here,
she wants to be with Casper.
- What?
- She wants a sexual experience.
She's a virgin.
- But, you're married.
- She asked the both of us.
- Did you say yes?
- Obviously.
- Are you going to sleep with her?
- I'll do my bit to help.
And she's a "Mandril" fan?
- Yes.
- That was what triggered her.
It's wild. I'm over 50 and now I
have to take virginity again.
He's so damn lucky.
It's so typical of him.
He always gets these kinds of deals.
- What do you mean?
- He gets to be unfaithful without being scolded.
- Are you jealous?
No, no, no... Well, she didn't call me.
I was also in "Mandrillen".
It could very well have happened.
- It's good that she follows her dream.
It is nice. I don't know
how nice it is of him.
- Would you give your permission?
- I don't think. Or...
It's difficult.
- That's what I mean.
It is difficult.
What's this?
A diaper. Has your mother forgotten that?
- What is it?
- Has she been changing diapers?
Hell, Pykker. There's a whole packet!
- I'm going to text her.
- No, don't do that.
Yes. Otherwise she'll do it again.
Next time she goes ...
Frank, it's mine!
- Is it yours?
- Yes.
Well...
Have you started peeing in your pants?
Sometimes I can't hold on.
So I pee a little.
Well, honey.
Have you gotten that old?
Do you drink too much soda?
No. And you mustn't tell anyone.
No. I wouldn't dream of it.
I promise.
Have you got one on now?
- Hey, Frank.
- Hi, hi. Hi, Ole.
- Asger, Pilou and ... - Martin.
- Ann Lind?
- Yes.
- Shall we start?
- Yes.
Cheers.
- Do I also ...
- Cheers to everyone.
- Now then, Pilou. Over to you.
Thanks so much. I'm very proud of ...
Welcome, Frank. It's fantastic.
It's a Belgian, Flemish, French film from '92.
It's a mockumentary.
- "It Happened Near You."
- It's brilliant.
- It's a candidate for this year's best film.
- Which one is the favorite?
- Mine.
We haven't seen it yet.
And afterwards there'll be a surprise from Holberg no. 19.
My favorite cafe.
Are they the ones who bring olives from Monte Amiata?
Tom drives there himself down through Europe.
I've wanted to taste them for
years, but haven't got round to it.
- Then, here we go.
- Well, how good!
No, man!
Please, just be quiet. Frank.
What the hell are you doing?
- What?
- Stay seated. Light.
- What happened?
Frank has no glasses. He can't see
anything without them.
- I was cleaning them.
- You can't see without glasses.
For your information, we have a rule.
If someone falls out, you have to start over.
When we saw "Apocalypse Now" and you
sniffed, we didn't start again.
It was an at-chu. I stopped the sneeze.
- I would also agree that.
- I can see.
You have to take a test? Take off your glasses.
- Concentrate.
- How many fingers am I holding up?
How many?
- One finger.
- No! There are two!
- They were too close to each other.
- Sit down, Martin.
- Is it back to the beginning?
- Yes.
- Is it with the intro?
- Yes, obviously.
92. It's Flemish. It's Belgian. It's French.
It's a masterpiece.
Do we not agree that it got better?
- Yes.
- If we look into ourselves.
I wasn't ready the first time.
- It was insanely good the second time.
- Where's Martin?
- He's a double creditor.
- Is he still watching?
- He watches the captions twice.
- We have a guest to choose food.
- Should I choose?
- Yes.
I look forward to it.
Choosing what we'll eat.
I have an Indian friend.
He does some super cool things.
- I know him well.
- Special treatment.
- Then you we're ready.
- Olives! Where are they?
- They're right in front of you.
- It's different.
- Pilou.
- There's none here.
- In the bowl.
It's empty. There were two for each.
Mine should have been here.
- I had two.
- Two there.
- Two there. Thor.
- I had one.
You only had one, Ole. You've held back.
Two to Asger. Thor.
No.
There was an extra one. Maybe two extras.
I thought you were gone.
- You thought I was gone?
I didn't realise that you were a
double creditor.
See you.
Martin! You can't leave in the
middle of my masterpiece!
It's not just about you.
Martin hasn't gotten his olives.
I know the movie I want to choose.
- "Dr. Strangelove". Do you know it?
- Yes.
"How I Love to Stop Worrying". No, wait a minute.
"Dr. Strangelove". It has the
subtitle: "How Do I Stop ..."
- "How I Learned to Stop Worrying".
- Take it again.
- Is she 25 and a virgin?
- Yes. I'm not filling you with lies.
Insane. I'd like that too. I was also in "Mandrillen".
Women are turned on by power than by him
who's punched himself in the face.
Many ladies fall for you, but some
prefer a guy like me.
Mia. She absolutely loves you.
It's not completely crazy. You are together.
She has started wearing diapers.
- Diapers.
- For fuck sake. It's disgusting.
- Do you have a picture of her?
- I'm going to see her now.
- Where ...
- Nelly. Do you want to come?
- There she is. She's sitting there.
- Is that her there?
Yes. In the wheelchair.
- Hello.
- Hi there. Nice to meet you.
- You too.
- Hi. My name is Nelly.
- Hi.
- Bolette.
She's my helper.
- Okay. - Excited?
- Yes! You might say.
- Should we have some wine?
- May I choose something for us?
- Yes.
Let's go. See you, Frank.
Yes, hey.
- I didn't know if you knew me.
- Yes, I do.
I was part of that ensemble.
You were also mega-skilled in
the "Mandrill Agreement".
- You noticed.
- Yes. It's hard not to notice.
- I'm not sure if it will go well with Casper.
- That's the deal.
Should something go wrong, feel
free to contact me.
- Okay.
- My wife will need to be there too.
Like Fnug. That's a good way to do it.
I'm very impressed.
My wife is also very positive about it.
- Well, it's Casper I've contacted.
- So that's...
No.
- Here we are.
- It's damn cute in there.
- See you, Frank.
- Yes. I have to go now.
- Hi, Harinder.
- How are you?
- It's good.
- Like that. Nice to see you.
I ordered some takeaway.
And also have a special order to make.
Thursday next week at 12 I would like
to have seven luxury menus.
- Special treat.
- Yes. Special treat. I'll make a note.
Fantastic. How is the boy otherwise? Ankha?
Yes. You remember well.
- Yes. How is he?
- He's very good.
- Did you go to Punjab?
- Two months ago.
- To see the old ones?
- Yes.
- They're fine. Your food is ready.
- Fantastic. You must thank your wife.
- I'll let her know.
- Thanks.
Bye, Henrik.
- No. What did you say?
- Henrik.
No. Frank, right?
It's yours, Henrik. It says on here.
My name is Frank. I've been coming
here for ten years.
- Sorry.
- Do you remember me at all?
- No.
- My name is Frank.
Frank. Good.
See you, Frank.
- What's your name?
- Snøvsen. I'm a snob.
- My name is Alf.
- It's funny.
- What are you watching?
- "Snøvsen".
I love that movie.
- Isn't it a children's film?
- Yes.
- Do you like chewing gum?
- It's so funny.
- Chewing gum!
Now it's coming.
Take this now.
Damn, I have to pee.
- Have you peed?
- Yes.
- Isn't the diaper on?
- No.
Hi.
- Hey?
- What now?
Is there anyone home?
There you are, sit and hide.
It looks cozy.
Hi.
- It looks good.
- We just sat and watched a movie.
- What did you see?
- It doesn't matter.
- Do you sit and watch porn?
- Are you in the middle of something naughty?
- No. We just ate.
- Just some food and a movie.
We have some news.
The film club. Because of the atmosphere last
time, it's with ladies next time.
- We're coming, Mia!
- Are you coming with us?
- And get some drinks?
- So we can create a good atmosphere.
We'd like that.
Mia, I've talked to my mom's
friend about you -
- because she has a clinic down in Switzerland.
- She thinks she can help you.
- Help me?
Yes. She specialises in squat exercises.
If you pee a little now and then,
she is the expert in Europe.
She has videos she can upload.
She also wants to call.
Fnug, I'm in control of it.
- So you no longer pee.
- No, no.
- Then it was a false alarm.
- Did you find out from Casper?
- Yes.
- I said it was a secret!
I wasn't aware of that. We've come to help you.
Yes. You shouldn't be ashamed.
Many older ladies do.
She's ashamed of fucking peeing.
She's just peed in her pants.
- Now?
- Yes. A little bit.
- You can smell it.
- I told you not to say that!
- Don't be sad.
- Don't tell me not... go!
- Where are you going?
- I have to be with Nelly now.
So I have to pull myself together a
little bit. Bye, bye, Mia. Sorry.
It had come out sooner or later, honey.
- Hi, Harinder.
- Hi.
My order must be made for
14 Harinder special offers.
Exactly.
Frank.
- That's right, Harinder.
- Take care.
Hey there. Are you ready to see "Dr. Strangelove"?
"How I Learned to Worry and Love..."
No. "How I Learned..."
- We're staying at home.
- This is my chance to win.
- You'll just have to do it by yourself.
- Why, what's going on?
Casper hasn't been with Nelly as she promised.
- Weren't you up at d'Angleterre?
- She showed up in a hat and glasses.
I lost focus.
- I did the carer instead.
- No.
- Did you do the caregiver?
- Yes.
- There was a big lack of focus.
- And then there's those legs.
- What about Nelly?
- That's it. I nearly fell over.
I take off Nelly's pants and get
confused by the thin legs.
You see her legs, and what happened then?
- I decided to hit the other one.
- Then she's still a virgin.
It's sad. I don't know what's
the right thing to do.
We now have to cleasne you completely.
I can only think, "Out lying on that grass!"
- Yes. At least for a week.
- Minimum!
- I think we should get started.
- Yes. Have you peed?
I was here a lot in the 90's.
I hope you like it.
The last man has arrived. We are gathered
again in Les amis du cinéma -
- which has been extended. These young women
are all characterised by one thing.
They are all 23 years old and they are
writing a doctoral degree in media studies.
Impressive. Good to get some women into
a male-dominated film world.
It's time for them to come in with their
spiritual estrogen.
I thought it was with wives.
It can be, it will be sometime.
You never know.
Mia, you also work with film or what?
- No. - What do you do?
- I have a tea shop.
- And trade?
- She sells olives.
- You can eat them all.
- Shall we move on?
- If I'm not mistaken ...
What did you bring with you?
- Film of the year.
- Arh.
- Yes, I have.
I have to stop you. There's an
Indian down in the basement.
He has food with him and asks for Frans.
- Did he call me Frans?
- Yes.
- Are you sure?
- You can believe it. 110%.
I need to talk to him. I'll be back in a second.
Harinder. You humiliated me!
You call me Frans! Everyone's laughing at me!
I considered ourselves a kind of friends.
A man I could have a nice chat with.
Hey, Frank!
Yeah...
- In other words...
- Now I'm ready.
- Get comfortable.
- It's time to see Frank's film.
But you weren't here, so we had to
ask your wife.
Mia would have chosen the one you
should have shown us.
- But, she couldn't remember Frans's film.
- There was something about "How"...
Yes. We just have "How".
If you don't remember the movie you
want to present to the others -
- we shall be asking for the last
movie you saw at home.
- What was it.
- "Snøvsen".
- Then we will see "Snøvsen".
- My movie is "Dr. Strangelove".
- Which would have been a good offer.
- I have prepared a...
We have chosen for you.
Or, rather, Mia has chosen, "Snøvsen".
- Yes!
- Come on.
- What's your name? - Snøvsen. I'm a snob.
Oops. Every time they try to score,
someone comes and kicks the ball out.
- He destroys everything!
- No.
Oh no. I've had a little mishap.
No, no, honey. You can't go in the
middle of the movie.
- Get out of the way!
- We stay here.
- No.
- Someone has left the hall.
If someone walks, it's the rule of thumb.
It's back from the ground up then.
Why has Mia left? Why the fuck did Mia go?!
What happened?! Come on!
- She's peed in her pants.
- Right now?
There is a small stain.
Number five in... one, two, three, four.
Fifth row number five.
- Kieslowski's seat.
- For God's sake. It's piss.
- She doesn't do it on purpose.
- What a disgusting thing!
Now you stop!!
- How old are you? 60?
- Stop! Stop!
What the hell are you doing?
Then I peed in my pants too.
Throw yourselves at me.
I didn't pee. I didn't.
I just spilled some white wine.
Did you just spill white wine?
- Did you pee?
- Yes. I've peed in my pants.
- It's sad.
- Yes. It's a shame for her.
Hey, Fnug. Good morning.
Well, I'm slipping away now.
But, you must feel good.
Good luck. It'll probably be fine.
- You need to sit down?
- Yes.
We've talked a little, me and Fnug.
There's a little issue with the sclerosis girl.
That's what I have to ask you.
I wonder if you can remedy that and go with her.
- Should I be with her?
- Yes. You were also in the "Mandrill".
If that's what you think needs to be done.
- Max. One hour.
- Yes.
- No oral sex. - No.
- Give her a good ride.
- Yes.
Thanks, honey. It's sweet of you.
Yeah.
- I think we are doing the right thing.
- I think so too.
- Hi there.
- Does Nelly live here?
- Yes.
- Who are you?
- I'm Nelly's carer.
- Have you been with Casper?
No. She's been fired.
Okay. I'd like to talk to Nelly.
- Yes. Nelly.
- I'm coming.
- My name is Mia. I'm Frank's wife.
I've heard it went wrong the
other day with Casper.
We come because we have a
band-aid fix for you.
Yeah... Hi.
We would offer that you could be
with Frank instead.
With Frank?
I'm not interested in that.
Okay.
- Have you arranged anything else?
- No. I already told you that.
Don't you remember it?
- What are you saying?
When we met at the wine bar,
you invited yourself then, too.
I said then I didn't want to.
- No.
- Yes. - No.
We talked about what could happen if
you were not with Casper.
- Nice, but, no thanks.
- Yes. And sorry.
Bye, bye.
You fucking tried to be unfaithful to me!
I have permission. There's just something
wrong with the timing.
- Hello Darling. Can I come in?
- No. I just need the sleeping pad.
What's happening?
You won't get grounded if you lie on top of it.
Sleep tight.
- It's Frank.
- Hi, Frank, it's Ole.
- Hi Ole.
- Congratulations. "Snøvsen" won.
- Has "Snøvsen" won this year's film?
- What ?!
All the girls voted for it.
You won. Congratulations.
It's the end of it now.
The club is closed.