Kingdoms (2019): Season 1, Episode 3 - Episode #1.3 - full transcript
KINGDOMS
THE WORLD OF THE HASSIDIM
Tomb of Rabbi Aaron of Belz
I look like all the others,
I mean,
it's not only because
it's how I was raised,
I choose to be like all the others
and it's a deep understanding that
the fact that I wear a hat over my wig.
even if others don't know
what it means.
it's my inner understanding
that I carry with me always,
on my head and within myself,
that this is me
and I belong to this group.
A woman who belongs
to a Hassidic community.
let's start with
a sociological definition.
This is my team.
It's my whole identity,
from the way I look
to where my children
go to school.
It's the name that appears
in every prayer-book I pray from.
I was born to side with this team
and these people
and they're etched in my experience.
Throughout my childhood
I knew that the late great Rabbi
was an angel
and I still feel it to this day.
my heart trembles
when I go there.
Do your children feel the same?
You can ask them,
but I really hope so.
I've done my part.
I hope...
it seeps into them, too.
I hope so.
Helpmate
Since the late 1990s more and more
Haredis have tried to enter the modern job market.
This is the result of increasing poverty.
The Key Center is a guidance center
for Haredis (Ultra-Orthodox Jews)
which offers workshops on how to behave
at a job interview and so on,
filling in the gaps
including courses in English,
math and computer applications.
We don't have the skills to fit in.
At a very late age
you have to learn a language,
which is very hard.
you have to learn math..
We're taking that on ourselves
and it's very difficult.
Haredis are now working.
They have no choice.
they have to go out and work
and they pay a price for it.
they live in poverty
and they work hard
while they raise their children
and they have to deal
with the system.
Percentage of working Hareeli women: 73%
Percentage of working Haredi men: 51%
I have a question for you.
What do you wish the most
for your children?
That they be happy.
-That they be happy.
Let's say your daughter
is more successful than you.
Does that bother you?
-No.
Does it bother you that
your daughter is prettier than you?
On the contrary.
-On the contrary.
Does it bother parents
if their children
are more pious than they are?
-If only.
If only.
"Career" isn't a dirty word.
I have a lecture about
what a career is
and when I bring it to seminaries
the principals faint.
"Don't mention that word."
As managers,
your employees are your pupils.
Balancing work and life.
Incidentally,
the course is very universal.
Women from every background
learn it
because from an early age
women start both careers and families
and the awareness
of starting a family
at an early age has become...
more prevalent.
But I'll speak for myself.
In our community
we start our first career
at a very early age,
which is the family.
and we want to put
all our energy into it.
Even if I work many hours a day
it's a default choice.
Why?
Because I want to spend
more time at home.
All the girls have a profession.
They all study, the question is
what they chose to do
with what they studied.
but that's the standard route.
Why don't we have
a quick shower and clean it?
How are you so clean?
You were dirty before!
We've been going out
to work for a long time
because we have to.
For a long time now
we don't stay home
and learn to cook with
our mothers, we go to school.
and that's another revolution
that took place.
Bryndie, will you make sure
everything's ready for my trip to Toronto
in Sunday?
Put everything on the computer
and pack everything.
-Who's the eldest?
She is, she's sitting over there.
These two are twins.
Wow. -Yes.
They're twins and there's,
another one. My son studies...
psychology, something like that.
How's the boss?
He's a boss.
At work he's the boss,
everything has to run smoothly.
He's a real boss.
Once we get home
he turns into Daddy.
Most of my clients are men.
They've gotten used to it.
They have meetings with them,
and I'm not talking about
Jews from other sectors.
I'm talking about Hassidim who
aren't used to sitting with women.
they've gotten used to it.
They sit with them and go over
the plans and things.
No problem at all.
-It isn't hard for you?
No.
It's technical.
-It's technical, it's my job.
Holds 12,000 worshipers
when full
Never has a religious Jew
managed projects like this
as the engineer and architect.
I don't know where
the Rebbe found him.
Rabbi Aaron Ostreicher.
He told him to move to Israel,
he didn't know what to expect,
he dropped everything
and only brought his wife and kids,
he moved to Israel only because
the Rebbe told him to,
And since then he's improved
the whole building.
he understood the needs
of the Haredi public.
Are you pleased with the results?
Not at all.
The synagogue is too small.
My sons-in-law study Torah.
Ariel...
-In yeshivas?
Yes, one is almost a headmaster...
They're mowing up.
And that makes me proud,
I enjoy every minute
knowing I'm working here
and someone else is doing
what I'd like to be doing
but I don't have the privilege.
But at least my children are,
so I enjoy every minute.
Isn't it best for a person
to both work and study?
They work, too,
but at other things.
Someone has to be
the mother at home.
someone has to
take care of the kids.
So they switched roles.
My daughter works
and supports the family
and her husband studies Torah,
comes home and takes care of the kids.
puts them to bed,
sends them to school.
One of my daughters
has seven children.
That's a lot of housework.
So the father does it all.
That's real feminism.
You said it, not me.
But it's fairly common
for parents to switch roles.
If he's happy and she's happy
then nothing's feeing forced,
he's happy and she's happy.
Sometimes I ask her:
Do you want to stop working
No, they're happy.
Lower it.
It's the greatest gift.
If you hear that someone of a certain age
is still studying Torah,
that's the most enviable thing
a woman can hear,
and I imagine, a man too.
That's the highlight of what
a Hassidic family can achieve.
Ashkenazis begin to recite repentance prayers
on the Sunday before Rosh Hashanah
Awake for repentance prayers,
rise and serve your Creator...
Awake for repentance prayers,
rise and serve your Creator...
"Happy, are those who dwell in Your house,
they will praise You."
"Happy, are those who dwell in Your house,
they will praise You."
Etrog! Want to buy an etrog (citron)?
We're going to buy
the Four Species.
Rabbi Firer, give me a nice lulav
(palm frond).
Shloimi, which one is better,
this or this?
Which is nicer?
Nicer or more strictly kosher?
Nicer is more strictly kosher.
I think this one is.
You think this one is.
Ushi, after this we'll buy you
an etrog. Okay?
Why do we need an etrog?
For the Four Species, of course.
Yes, but can we buy
another one for me?
It's not for you,
only boys get them. Okay?
Do you have nice etrogs here?
Everyone's been through them, huh?
See, Ushi?
What's this?
An etrog.
Can an etrog be yellow?
Sure, this one's yellow.
Daddy, which is nicer,
the green or the yellow?
Which do you think is nicer?
I don't know.
Yellow, I think.
What do you think, Shloimi?
This one's very nice.
But there's a black spot.
Yes, but it's very small.
Be careful.
I saw something here.
Turn it around.
Here, what's this?
Nothing is perfect. Just as no heart
is perfect, no etrog is perfect.
Can you give me a box
so I can ask the rabbi?
Can I take two?
Do we have to ask every time?
I took two.
If one is no good,
maybe the other one is.
They both seem good.
I can take another look.
He sits in his room
and lots of people come
to ask about etrogs.
Only etrogs? Not lulavs?
Anything.
But how does the rabbi know?
The rabbi has learned
a lot of Torah
and he knows if it's kosher or not.
I have two nice etrogs.
They're supposed to be beautiful.
Everything should be beautiful.
Yes.
I'd take this one.
Yes?
Is that considered beautiful?
Very nice, despite
a few minor things.
Like what?
Is it worth 300 shekels?
It's considered beautiful.
It's considered beautiful
and it has a nice growth.
Yes.
The rabbi says
we should take this one.
Take that one.
-Thank you.
You can also buy etrogs
in a sealed box.
At the market there are etrogs
in sealed boxes with a sticker
that shows they haven't
with a stamp that indicates
that the etrog is kosher.
I don't have to shop around
or go to the rabbi
or make an effort,
buy an etrog.
buy a sealed lulav,
buy all Four Species.
But we want to make an effort
for the Torah's sake.
Whatever's important to us,
we'll make an effort.
It's a matter of education.
When the child sees at home
that something's taken seriously.
he understands it's serious.
We want to show the children
that the Mitzvah is important
so we make an effort.
We don't just buy
whatever is available.
we don't buy the Four Species online.
We make an effort.
What do you want to be
when you grow up?
A Torah scholar.
-A Torah scholar?
Ushi, what do you want to be
when you grow up?
Ushi, what do you want to be
when you grow up?
Ushi.
Ushi likes to be a smart-aleck.
Estie?
A rabbi's wife.
She wants to be a rabbi's wife.
A rabbi's wife?
What do you want to be
when you grow up?
A rabbi's wife.
Tighten your helmet straps, Asher.
Modesty, Estie.
Ush, you want Mommy
to hold your hand?
Here, I'll help you skate.
When we take buses or go,
God forbid, to the doctor
or whatever,
we interact with secular people.
but very seldom.
There's no real closeness because
the interaction is very technical.
The older kids can recognize
a secular person who doesn't
observe the Torah.
They know the difference,
we explain how we're different,
but that's it.
You're assuming that being secular
is normal, neutral,
and being Haredi isn't.
When I was a little girl
and on the street
I saw a secular couple walking a dog.
the Tel Aviv stereotype,
one child and a dog.
I felt sorry for them.
I thought they envied me
because I have a big family
with lots of fun things going on.
When I grew up, I realized:
Okay, they don't envy me.
Nobody envies anybody.
Their's no prohibition against mixing
big chunks into a drink
Diligent students' class, 7 p.m.
such as oil in salad.
Shloimi is a special boy.
A diligent student.
Thank God, it's a gift from Heaven.
I can't claim credit for it.
How does it manifest?
Shloimi is naturally diligent,
he likes to study.
he likes having a framework.
he's very disciplined.
He's already got a good
reputation for Hassidism.
Shloimi has a very lofty sou
he's special, he's already completed
3 of the 6 books of Mishnah
and he's only 12.
He's always being tested,
he wakes up at 6:30,
I see him studying on the couch,
he comes home from school at 7 p.m.
and continues to study, he studies
with his father in the afternoon.
"Dad, I'm coming home for lunch
I'll study with you."
They study together at night,
he has other study partners, too.
He's exceptional.
If only all Jews had...
And what I expect from Shloimi,
God willing.
is for him to continue this way.
And become a great scholar?
-Become a great scholar.
then a yeshiva headmaster.
a master-teacher..
Continue his Torah study
and teach others.
That's my aspiration for Shloimi.
All I can do is pray.
This will be our home
for the next week.
It's a small house,
but it's written:
"Leave your permanent home
and dwell in a temporary home."
I sleep here with the boys.
Can you hold it in the middle?
-Sure.
And if you ask:
How do I know that...
I can send a messenger?
What if Shloimi comes to you
when he's in his 20s
and says:
"Dad, I want to be a doctor"?
He can't be a doctor.
He can be a doctor.
I agree, he has to matriculate first.
he can do that quickly.
True, he can't start medical school
when he's 20,
but if he decides he wants
to be a doctor when he's 30,
I don't know if it'll be
worth his while,
but he'll be able
to catch up very quickly.
Now...
Another point.
We aren't here to be doctors.
Why not?
Not that doctors are bad,
God forbid.
We're here for
a very specific purpose.
We only live once
and we want to do
certain things while we're alive.
The question is,
what are your priorities? A career
or Torah study
and self-betterment?
And you have to make a living.
Together, Tribes of Israel...
Pentateuch Banquet
Celebrating the beginning of study at age 5
The groom, Ushi Weisfeld.
"Who kept us and sustained us
and brought us to this day..."
The gentiles said:
"No, keep the Torah to Yourself."
The Jews grabbed the Torah
and said: "The Lord is one"
The Torah was given to us
as a gift
To study Torah more and more
and keep its commandments...
You're aware that the education
your son is getting.
learning Yiddish, speaking Yiddish
in school,
learning hardly any math or English,
comes at a price.
Yes.
But learning them
also comes at a price.
I don't know what I'd choose
if I could determine
his curriculum.
but there's also a price
for not getting all the values
he's getting now,
going out into the world
without all the Gemara
and Judaism he's learning.
No, there are plenty
of Orthodox Jews
who are doctors and professors
and so on
and they still study Gemara
as well as physics and math.
Yes, but it's taking a risk.
If you're religious.
and these statistics
are known to all.
there's a 40% dropout rate
from the religious sector.
And I, as a Haredi woman,
refuse to take the chance.
Regretfully, I'm not preparing him
for the employment market.
and dealing with this market
I know the cost.
but I believe that for his identity
the restrictions he has
as a boy and a teenager
are crucial...
too crucial to give up.
So I do it with a heavy heart
and an understanding of the situation.
of what his opportunities
in the job market will be.
I want to give him
the best head-start
I can now,
and later, either he'll manage
or I'll support him.
There's no comparison in terms
of difficulty between yeshiva study
and study for a diploma
and matriculation.
and I've done both.
Yeshiva study is much harder
in terms of the amount
and type of material.
Here's an example.
I'm studying law.
Okay, maybe law is easy.
But it's still a degree.
You're given books in Hebrew,
clearly written,
you have instructors.
The Mishnah says:
"There's nothing in common between one
"who swears not to benefit from his friend
and one who swears not to take his food
"except entering his territory
and vessels not used for food."
What does this mean?
That if someone benefits from
his friend...
When you study Gemara
you study the most obtuse texts.
True, nowadays it's printed legibly.
but part of it is in Rashi script.
The texts are in Aramaic.
They don't take
all the adjunctive material
and insert it into the text
to make it organized.
Not at all.
It hasn't changed in 2,000 years.
say, for anyone who studied
Gemara in yeshiva
earning an MA
is a piece of cake.
A piece of cake.
"Women's Entrance"
Hoshana Rabah
Belz Great Synagogue
The husband comes home from
services on the High Holy Days,
which are Rosh Hashanah,
Simchat Torah, Hoshana Rabah,
Every time services are long
if anywhere else services end
at 1 or 2 p.m..
which is very late
since they start at 7 a.m..
for Belz Hassids,
services can end at 5
even 6:00.
Women who join
a Hassidic community
have a hard time dealing with this.
you're with the kids all day.
You don't know when
they're "coming home,"
we talk a lot about
when they're "coming home."
You keep an eye out.
You're always checking,you heat up the food.
you don't know what it
tastes like any more.
I also try to go to synagogue
to charging my batteries
since it's an incredibly
powerful service.
and when my kids were little
I hired a babysitter. It was worth it.
But even if I can't be
in the synagogue
I stay near the synagogue
and just hearing the echoes
and the roars of prayer
is amazing, the kids feel it too.
and everyone feels charged up.
It's a very difficult day, technically.
but still, as a Hassidic woman.
on holidays it's a different life.
It isn't the life of a non-Hassidic
Haredi woman
or a woman from
different Hassidic community
where the service isn't so long.
And we deal with it fine
It's hard but good.
Do you think you have less freedom
than I do, for instance?
I think that's a very liberal question.
You're assuming
that freedom is a sacred principle
or that freedom is the point
from which we measure
happiness.
I think it begins elsewhere.
It doesn't begin with freedom.
Do you think you're less free
than I am? -Definitely.
You're free and I'm not.
In the past they called
secular Jews "free."
I'm not free.
When I wake up,
I have to pray.
Never mind if I enjoy praying.
I have to pray.
I have to pray three times a day.
I have to observe the commandments.
I can't eat whatever I want.
I can't look at whatever I want.
And a free person..
-Is that hard?
Some things are hard.
Like what?
-We know that..
You wouldn't say
"pork is disgusting."
The Gemara says:
"Say that pork is delicious,"
but the Torah doesn't permit it.
By the strict definition
I obviously have less freedom.
but in many other terms,
community life, for instance.
I derive many things
that freedom can't give me.
They fight many things
such as loneliness
which is the number one
cause of suicide.
We see the statistics,
they don't lie.
people who live in a community
are less likely to commit suicide
and experience less depression.
So we're placing happiness.
if the absence of depression
can be defined as happiness.
up against freedom.
Freedom doesn't always win.
Of course I have restrictions.
Let's take the most trivial thing,
I don't have a driver's license.
which is very restrictive,
and I take care of the kids
so my freedom is restricted
twice over.
Yes, I use public transportation
and that's not easy.
Hassidim see a woman driving
as being very demonstrative
and masculine.
Sitting there and driving
is going too far.
Although women are leaders
in many positions,
driving is still considered taboo.
it's still an issue.
Okay, not everything is easy
I don't...
-Don't you ever wonder?
Yes, sometimes I wonder, '
in moments of self-examination.
as a Hassidic woman,
if I feel happy or comfortable*
And I always say to myself
that that issue may bother me
but ultimately,
when I put it all together,
okay, I don't understand everything.
It was the Rebbe of Kotzk
who said
that you don't want to follow
If you understand
everything he does.
he can't serve as a role model.
Kiryat Belz, preparations for
the wedding of the Rebbe's grandson
This is the tone..
And below it...
One, two, three.
Most Hassidim marry
at the age of 19
Couples get engaged at the age of 18
after three dates
After the engagement they don't meet
for a year until the wedding
"Go, my beloved, to greet..."
Close your mouths:
-..."the bride,
"We will greet the Sabbath..."
Today's lecture will be
about happiness.
in general and in married life.
Why is it so important
to study before marriage?
It's just like someone driving a car...
without a license
or a doctor opening a clinic
without having studied medicine.
In order to marry
and have a successful marriage,
we have to learn
and get to know the people involved
and what our obligations are.
what lies ahead.
And we'll learn all this, bit by bit,
until the wedding.
We have to realize
we go through a process
which is very fast at first.
In the past
grooms didn't receive counseling
before marriage
so people totally forgot
the basic customs
regarding man and wife.
They forget the Sages' instructions
about respecting one's wife,
"Love and respect her as yourself,"
and how you must avoid
"distressing one's wife"
and making her cry
and many other things the Sages said
about respecting one's wife.
as you heard from your counselors.
It answers the need
you mentioned before.
since, thank God,
our community has grown
and there are more Hassidim.
Everyone sometimes has
something to talk about,
questions, doubts,
and they need guidance or help.
Naturally the Rebbe can't deal with
his tens of thousands of Hassidim
and give them personal attention.
so he appoints group leaders.
What kind of problems come up?
The same problems everyone has...
Not problems, challenges.
One person's problem
is that he's studying something
he can't relate to and wants to know
if he can move on to something else.
or a student who needs advice
on how to pray better
and be a better Jew.
One wants advice on achieving
domestic harmony.
how to fill his house
with love and joy
so that the Divine Presence
dwells in his house. And so on.
So what happens now?
Bridegroom instructors such as myself
teach how to speak at home,
how to understand your partner.
and it's all true.
You must be willing to sacrifice
and give of yourself for her sake.
You may be good friends,
but you're the spiritual one!
We know, as we said last time.
that finding a mate is from God.
We're assigned our mates
40 days before we're conceived
and we know that marriage means
taking part in the act of creation
and we return to our primal state
in which God quarried us
from the Rock of Souls
before we came into the world,
and under the wedding canopy,
toy giving the wedding ring.
the souls reunite
and become one again.
With no one to defend
against the accuser
Speak words of law and justice
to Yaakov
Speak words of law and justice
Welcome..
I met my wife three times
before we were engaged.
And...
as long as the couple
is basically compatible
they can build a life together.
After three dates or less
you get engaged.
You don't see him for a year,
you see him all the time
from the women's section,
you observe him and learn his habits.
Does he look too?
-No way.
Sometimes he doesn't remember
what you look like.
Just kidding. Actually, it's possible.
But first you go through
a preparatory process.
I suppose it's scary,
it's scary for any couple.
knowing that the moment of truth
has come.
You really don’t know him
Knowing each other...
Even before that.
Hassidim get engaged
when they're very young,
at that age they can fall in love
just by looking at a photo.
even before they date.
I was 17.
What a privilege,
when you're 17 they tell you:
We've looked into everything
and made the rational choice for you.
What's "the rational choice"
The rational choice means...
we make rational choices
but with love
there are no rational choices.
With love we say:
This is what my heart tells me.
Why don't we say that
when we buy a house?
The roof leaks, but...
but I attach to it...
This is much more important
than buying a house.
My parents made
a perfectly rational choice.
They met the family.
They asked about the young man.
It's like buying a house,
but in this case
it's my partner for life.
And I'm a 17-year-old
who's prayed all her life
for a pious husband, a Torah scholar,
and I know that my mate
was assigned to me 40 days
before I was conceived.
And you ask the Rebbe.
A spiritual authority
gives his approval.
And I meet him to make sure
we're on the same page
and we can communicate.
This is a model
that makes no sense
in the liberal world.
but you have to realize that...
it's a winner.
He will bless the groom
and bride...
My son-in-law was about
the 100th young man
who came courting.
We checked them all out
and he was the most worthy.
Did you feel it on the first date?
Yes.
-Yes it was a lot of fun.
I don't know how it is
for other people.
maybe everyone feels a click
the first time they meet,
but on our first date
I felt something
You knew after the first date..
-No,
all I wanted was for him to want me.
I told my father: Chase down
his father... -Afterwards?
And tell him I want to
get married today.
I remember he came in
in the middle of the date and said:
That's enough, time's up.
Do boys feel the same?
They want to tie the knot
at such an early age? -Yes.
Really? -Yes.
Because men are more..
There's a powerful social influence.
That's how it goes,
in your first or second year
of yeshiva
the guys start getting married
one after another
and you want to get married, too.
You see friends
who are a year or two older
and they already have
a kid or two
and you can see yourself...
in the same position.
With this ring I do thee wed.
Mazel Tov!
May this be a good sign for us
and all Jews...
When you have your first misunderstanding,
your first quarrel.
your first tiff.
know that you've landed
in real life.
Because at first you think
love will conquer all
he's amazing.
You can't see any of his shortcomings.
You focus on the good,
which is good,
but suddenly all the bubbles burst
and Io and behold,
he has shortcomings.
And you have to understand him,
put yourself in his shoes.
It's a big change.
He's a yeshiva student.
who's only used to being
among boys.
he never saw women besides
his sisters and mother.
and suddenly he's living
with a woman, okay?
It's new to him.
She's his wife
and it's all pure and holy,
he's received guidance from his instructor.
but it's a big change for him
and you have to understand
that it's okay.
Sometimes he may feel
it's too much for him.
the home, the marriage.
He may run off to the synagogue
to study some Gemara,
that happens.
The wife usually finds
her refuge in her work.
Just realize that it's all normal
and all is well.
What can warm up the knife?
Hey, I know!
Maybe...
No matter how old you are,
when you get married
you realize what it involves.
you can't know what it's like
until you do it.
True. I told my instructor
after the wedding
that all the instruction before
the weeding is good and well.
but I think
there should be much less
pre-marriage instruction
and much more
post-marriage instruction
because before you're married
you don't understand.
you don't understand
what it's like to live with someone
in constant partnership.
It's not that you know
that it'll be complicated
and you don't know
how to approach it
so you have to learn.
You just don't know.
As she said,
they throw you in the deep end
and you start to swim
because you have to.
What about love?
What?
-Love.
it's there.
-I wish for all couples.
a love like we have.
There are a lot of positive things
about segregation.
I don't want to speak
in liberal terms and say: Yes,
segregation is all good,
because the segregation isn't done
for liberal reasons
or so that girls can excel.
It's done for religious reasons.
regardless of what the actual
religious law says.
There are demands made
of secular women
that are much more restrictive
and I don't want them. -Such as?
Such as,
when we go to a wedding
I dance with women.
I don't have to impress
any man in any way.
I feel incredibly free.
I don't even have to think about it.
As a Hassidic woman I see it
as a very impressive event.
The bride gets to dance with
all sorts of important people
and guests who made an effort to come.
to touching songs.
They won't touch her hand
because only her husband
will ever touch her.
So how do they dance before her
and create that bond?
The belt, the connecting cord.
is very meaningful
and it becomes
more and more impressive.
it's an impressive,
moving ceremony
and there are eulogies..
bringing up memories,
and everyone goes home happy.
We'll never forgo the ceremony.
It's not as if other women
have absolute freedom
and equality.
And of course with us
there is no absolute equality.
If we're talking about
a desire for equality.
it doesn’t exist.
I don't find equality and freedom
on the other side, on the contrary.
find it oppressive.
it tells women
how they should appear
at ceremonies
as opposed to how men
should appear
and she always has to be
a beautiful ornament
and I find that very oppressive.
It's objectifying in the same way that...
when people size up my skirt
to the last inch, it's just as objectifying
when I have to be pretty
for an event.
There are two sides to the coin.
I believe in equality
and I don't believe in essentialism.
I do believe that society tells you:
You should act this way
because you're male
and you should act this way
because you’re female.
And as a Haredi feminist
it's important to me that women have
a meaningful place,
they should know
more ritual law and Torah
and have a significant role
in serving God
and also to look at the things
that aren't laws but customs
that belong to a conservative society
and see where women
can be given more of a place
and how equality can be advanced
in those places.
The most amazing example of this
is the rabbi's wife who takes requests.
she's a real rebbe
and a pious role model
who's amazing by any standard
and you can learn about her.
But in many senses
we aren't there yet.
we're still only observers.
There are over 80,000 lawyers
in Israel. Aren't you concerned?
There's something unique about me,
I combine Jewish law
with Israeli law
and that's a rare combination
and I think I can make it work.
Don't stand in our way
and we'll do it big-time.
You asked if I'm proud.
I'm not proud, no.
Why not? You worked hard.
Yes and, thank God, I succeeded.
but I'd rather be proud of...
other things.
After all, law is just a profession.
And like someone who took a course
and earned an electrician's certificate
I don't know if he's proud,
it's just a profession
and a chance to make a living,
that's all, it doesn't make me
a different person.
It's my job, there's my job
and then there's me
and they're two different things.
THE WORLD OF THE HASSIDIM
Tomb of Rabbi Aaron of Belz
I look like all the others,
I mean,
it's not only because
it's how I was raised,
I choose to be like all the others
and it's a deep understanding that
the fact that I wear a hat over my wig.
even if others don't know
what it means.
it's my inner understanding
that I carry with me always,
on my head and within myself,
that this is me
and I belong to this group.
A woman who belongs
to a Hassidic community.
let's start with
a sociological definition.
This is my team.
It's my whole identity,
from the way I look
to where my children
go to school.
It's the name that appears
in every prayer-book I pray from.
I was born to side with this team
and these people
and they're etched in my experience.
Throughout my childhood
I knew that the late great Rabbi
was an angel
and I still feel it to this day.
my heart trembles
when I go there.
Do your children feel the same?
You can ask them,
but I really hope so.
I've done my part.
I hope...
it seeps into them, too.
I hope so.
Helpmate
Since the late 1990s more and more
Haredis have tried to enter the modern job market.
This is the result of increasing poverty.
The Key Center is a guidance center
for Haredis (Ultra-Orthodox Jews)
which offers workshops on how to behave
at a job interview and so on,
filling in the gaps
including courses in English,
math and computer applications.
We don't have the skills to fit in.
At a very late age
you have to learn a language,
which is very hard.
you have to learn math..
We're taking that on ourselves
and it's very difficult.
Haredis are now working.
They have no choice.
they have to go out and work
and they pay a price for it.
they live in poverty
and they work hard
while they raise their children
and they have to deal
with the system.
Percentage of working Hareeli women: 73%
Percentage of working Haredi men: 51%
I have a question for you.
What do you wish the most
for your children?
That they be happy.
-That they be happy.
Let's say your daughter
is more successful than you.
Does that bother you?
-No.
Does it bother you that
your daughter is prettier than you?
On the contrary.
-On the contrary.
Does it bother parents
if their children
are more pious than they are?
-If only.
If only.
"Career" isn't a dirty word.
I have a lecture about
what a career is
and when I bring it to seminaries
the principals faint.
"Don't mention that word."
As managers,
your employees are your pupils.
Balancing work and life.
Incidentally,
the course is very universal.
Women from every background
learn it
because from an early age
women start both careers and families
and the awareness
of starting a family
at an early age has become...
more prevalent.
But I'll speak for myself.
In our community
we start our first career
at a very early age,
which is the family.
and we want to put
all our energy into it.
Even if I work many hours a day
it's a default choice.
Why?
Because I want to spend
more time at home.
All the girls have a profession.
They all study, the question is
what they chose to do
with what they studied.
but that's the standard route.
Why don't we have
a quick shower and clean it?
How are you so clean?
You were dirty before!
We've been going out
to work for a long time
because we have to.
For a long time now
we don't stay home
and learn to cook with
our mothers, we go to school.
and that's another revolution
that took place.
Bryndie, will you make sure
everything's ready for my trip to Toronto
in Sunday?
Put everything on the computer
and pack everything.
-Who's the eldest?
She is, she's sitting over there.
These two are twins.
Wow. -Yes.
They're twins and there's,
another one. My son studies...
psychology, something like that.
How's the boss?
He's a boss.
At work he's the boss,
everything has to run smoothly.
He's a real boss.
Once we get home
he turns into Daddy.
Most of my clients are men.
They've gotten used to it.
They have meetings with them,
and I'm not talking about
Jews from other sectors.
I'm talking about Hassidim who
aren't used to sitting with women.
they've gotten used to it.
They sit with them and go over
the plans and things.
No problem at all.
-It isn't hard for you?
No.
It's technical.
-It's technical, it's my job.
Holds 12,000 worshipers
when full
Never has a religious Jew
managed projects like this
as the engineer and architect.
I don't know where
the Rebbe found him.
Rabbi Aaron Ostreicher.
He told him to move to Israel,
he didn't know what to expect,
he dropped everything
and only brought his wife and kids,
he moved to Israel only because
the Rebbe told him to,
And since then he's improved
the whole building.
he understood the needs
of the Haredi public.
Are you pleased with the results?
Not at all.
The synagogue is too small.
My sons-in-law study Torah.
Ariel...
-In yeshivas?
Yes, one is almost a headmaster...
They're mowing up.
And that makes me proud,
I enjoy every minute
knowing I'm working here
and someone else is doing
what I'd like to be doing
but I don't have the privilege.
But at least my children are,
so I enjoy every minute.
Isn't it best for a person
to both work and study?
They work, too,
but at other things.
Someone has to be
the mother at home.
someone has to
take care of the kids.
So they switched roles.
My daughter works
and supports the family
and her husband studies Torah,
comes home and takes care of the kids.
puts them to bed,
sends them to school.
One of my daughters
has seven children.
That's a lot of housework.
So the father does it all.
That's real feminism.
You said it, not me.
But it's fairly common
for parents to switch roles.
If he's happy and she's happy
then nothing's feeing forced,
he's happy and she's happy.
Sometimes I ask her:
Do you want to stop working
No, they're happy.
Lower it.
It's the greatest gift.
If you hear that someone of a certain age
is still studying Torah,
that's the most enviable thing
a woman can hear,
and I imagine, a man too.
That's the highlight of what
a Hassidic family can achieve.
Ashkenazis begin to recite repentance prayers
on the Sunday before Rosh Hashanah
Awake for repentance prayers,
rise and serve your Creator...
Awake for repentance prayers,
rise and serve your Creator...
"Happy, are those who dwell in Your house,
they will praise You."
"Happy, are those who dwell in Your house,
they will praise You."
Etrog! Want to buy an etrog (citron)?
We're going to buy
the Four Species.
Rabbi Firer, give me a nice lulav
(palm frond).
Shloimi, which one is better,
this or this?
Which is nicer?
Nicer or more strictly kosher?
Nicer is more strictly kosher.
I think this one is.
You think this one is.
Ushi, after this we'll buy you
an etrog. Okay?
Why do we need an etrog?
For the Four Species, of course.
Yes, but can we buy
another one for me?
It's not for you,
only boys get them. Okay?
Do you have nice etrogs here?
Everyone's been through them, huh?
See, Ushi?
What's this?
An etrog.
Can an etrog be yellow?
Sure, this one's yellow.
Daddy, which is nicer,
the green or the yellow?
Which do you think is nicer?
I don't know.
Yellow, I think.
What do you think, Shloimi?
This one's very nice.
But there's a black spot.
Yes, but it's very small.
Be careful.
I saw something here.
Turn it around.
Here, what's this?
Nothing is perfect. Just as no heart
is perfect, no etrog is perfect.
Can you give me a box
so I can ask the rabbi?
Can I take two?
Do we have to ask every time?
I took two.
If one is no good,
maybe the other one is.
They both seem good.
I can take another look.
He sits in his room
and lots of people come
to ask about etrogs.
Only etrogs? Not lulavs?
Anything.
But how does the rabbi know?
The rabbi has learned
a lot of Torah
and he knows if it's kosher or not.
I have two nice etrogs.
They're supposed to be beautiful.
Everything should be beautiful.
Yes.
I'd take this one.
Yes?
Is that considered beautiful?
Very nice, despite
a few minor things.
Like what?
Is it worth 300 shekels?
It's considered beautiful.
It's considered beautiful
and it has a nice growth.
Yes.
The rabbi says
we should take this one.
Take that one.
-Thank you.
You can also buy etrogs
in a sealed box.
At the market there are etrogs
in sealed boxes with a sticker
that shows they haven't
with a stamp that indicates
that the etrog is kosher.
I don't have to shop around
or go to the rabbi
or make an effort,
buy an etrog.
buy a sealed lulav,
buy all Four Species.
But we want to make an effort
for the Torah's sake.
Whatever's important to us,
we'll make an effort.
It's a matter of education.
When the child sees at home
that something's taken seriously.
he understands it's serious.
We want to show the children
that the Mitzvah is important
so we make an effort.
We don't just buy
whatever is available.
we don't buy the Four Species online.
We make an effort.
What do you want to be
when you grow up?
A Torah scholar.
-A Torah scholar?
Ushi, what do you want to be
when you grow up?
Ushi, what do you want to be
when you grow up?
Ushi.
Ushi likes to be a smart-aleck.
Estie?
A rabbi's wife.
She wants to be a rabbi's wife.
A rabbi's wife?
What do you want to be
when you grow up?
A rabbi's wife.
Tighten your helmet straps, Asher.
Modesty, Estie.
Ush, you want Mommy
to hold your hand?
Here, I'll help you skate.
When we take buses or go,
God forbid, to the doctor
or whatever,
we interact with secular people.
but very seldom.
There's no real closeness because
the interaction is very technical.
The older kids can recognize
a secular person who doesn't
observe the Torah.
They know the difference,
we explain how we're different,
but that's it.
You're assuming that being secular
is normal, neutral,
and being Haredi isn't.
When I was a little girl
and on the street
I saw a secular couple walking a dog.
the Tel Aviv stereotype,
one child and a dog.
I felt sorry for them.
I thought they envied me
because I have a big family
with lots of fun things going on.
When I grew up, I realized:
Okay, they don't envy me.
Nobody envies anybody.
Their's no prohibition against mixing
big chunks into a drink
Diligent students' class, 7 p.m.
such as oil in salad.
Shloimi is a special boy.
A diligent student.
Thank God, it's a gift from Heaven.
I can't claim credit for it.
How does it manifest?
Shloimi is naturally diligent,
he likes to study.
he likes having a framework.
he's very disciplined.
He's already got a good
reputation for Hassidism.
Shloimi has a very lofty sou
he's special, he's already completed
3 of the 6 books of Mishnah
and he's only 12.
He's always being tested,
he wakes up at 6:30,
I see him studying on the couch,
he comes home from school at 7 p.m.
and continues to study, he studies
with his father in the afternoon.
"Dad, I'm coming home for lunch
I'll study with you."
They study together at night,
he has other study partners, too.
He's exceptional.
If only all Jews had...
And what I expect from Shloimi,
God willing.
is for him to continue this way.
And become a great scholar?
-Become a great scholar.
then a yeshiva headmaster.
a master-teacher..
Continue his Torah study
and teach others.
That's my aspiration for Shloimi.
All I can do is pray.
This will be our home
for the next week.
It's a small house,
but it's written:
"Leave your permanent home
and dwell in a temporary home."
I sleep here with the boys.
Can you hold it in the middle?
-Sure.
And if you ask:
How do I know that...
I can send a messenger?
What if Shloimi comes to you
when he's in his 20s
and says:
"Dad, I want to be a doctor"?
He can't be a doctor.
He can be a doctor.
I agree, he has to matriculate first.
he can do that quickly.
True, he can't start medical school
when he's 20,
but if he decides he wants
to be a doctor when he's 30,
I don't know if it'll be
worth his while,
but he'll be able
to catch up very quickly.
Now...
Another point.
We aren't here to be doctors.
Why not?
Not that doctors are bad,
God forbid.
We're here for
a very specific purpose.
We only live once
and we want to do
certain things while we're alive.
The question is,
what are your priorities? A career
or Torah study
and self-betterment?
And you have to make a living.
Together, Tribes of Israel...
Pentateuch Banquet
Celebrating the beginning of study at age 5
The groom, Ushi Weisfeld.
"Who kept us and sustained us
and brought us to this day..."
The gentiles said:
"No, keep the Torah to Yourself."
The Jews grabbed the Torah
and said: "The Lord is one"
The Torah was given to us
as a gift
To study Torah more and more
and keep its commandments...
You're aware that the education
your son is getting.
learning Yiddish, speaking Yiddish
in school,
learning hardly any math or English,
comes at a price.
Yes.
But learning them
also comes at a price.
I don't know what I'd choose
if I could determine
his curriculum.
but there's also a price
for not getting all the values
he's getting now,
going out into the world
without all the Gemara
and Judaism he's learning.
No, there are plenty
of Orthodox Jews
who are doctors and professors
and so on
and they still study Gemara
as well as physics and math.
Yes, but it's taking a risk.
If you're religious.
and these statistics
are known to all.
there's a 40% dropout rate
from the religious sector.
And I, as a Haredi woman,
refuse to take the chance.
Regretfully, I'm not preparing him
for the employment market.
and dealing with this market
I know the cost.
but I believe that for his identity
the restrictions he has
as a boy and a teenager
are crucial...
too crucial to give up.
So I do it with a heavy heart
and an understanding of the situation.
of what his opportunities
in the job market will be.
I want to give him
the best head-start
I can now,
and later, either he'll manage
or I'll support him.
There's no comparison in terms
of difficulty between yeshiva study
and study for a diploma
and matriculation.
and I've done both.
Yeshiva study is much harder
in terms of the amount
and type of material.
Here's an example.
I'm studying law.
Okay, maybe law is easy.
But it's still a degree.
You're given books in Hebrew,
clearly written,
you have instructors.
The Mishnah says:
"There's nothing in common between one
"who swears not to benefit from his friend
and one who swears not to take his food
"except entering his territory
and vessels not used for food."
What does this mean?
That if someone benefits from
his friend...
When you study Gemara
you study the most obtuse texts.
True, nowadays it's printed legibly.
but part of it is in Rashi script.
The texts are in Aramaic.
They don't take
all the adjunctive material
and insert it into the text
to make it organized.
Not at all.
It hasn't changed in 2,000 years.
say, for anyone who studied
Gemara in yeshiva
earning an MA
is a piece of cake.
A piece of cake.
"Women's Entrance"
Hoshana Rabah
Belz Great Synagogue
The husband comes home from
services on the High Holy Days,
which are Rosh Hashanah,
Simchat Torah, Hoshana Rabah,
Every time services are long
if anywhere else services end
at 1 or 2 p.m..
which is very late
since they start at 7 a.m..
for Belz Hassids,
services can end at 5
even 6:00.
Women who join
a Hassidic community
have a hard time dealing with this.
you're with the kids all day.
You don't know when
they're "coming home,"
we talk a lot about
when they're "coming home."
You keep an eye out.
You're always checking,you heat up the food.
you don't know what it
tastes like any more.
I also try to go to synagogue
to charging my batteries
since it's an incredibly
powerful service.
and when my kids were little
I hired a babysitter. It was worth it.
But even if I can't be
in the synagogue
I stay near the synagogue
and just hearing the echoes
and the roars of prayer
is amazing, the kids feel it too.
and everyone feels charged up.
It's a very difficult day, technically.
but still, as a Hassidic woman.
on holidays it's a different life.
It isn't the life of a non-Hassidic
Haredi woman
or a woman from
different Hassidic community
where the service isn't so long.
And we deal with it fine
It's hard but good.
Do you think you have less freedom
than I do, for instance?
I think that's a very liberal question.
You're assuming
that freedom is a sacred principle
or that freedom is the point
from which we measure
happiness.
I think it begins elsewhere.
It doesn't begin with freedom.
Do you think you're less free
than I am? -Definitely.
You're free and I'm not.
In the past they called
secular Jews "free."
I'm not free.
When I wake up,
I have to pray.
Never mind if I enjoy praying.
I have to pray.
I have to pray three times a day.
I have to observe the commandments.
I can't eat whatever I want.
I can't look at whatever I want.
And a free person..
-Is that hard?
Some things are hard.
Like what?
-We know that..
You wouldn't say
"pork is disgusting."
The Gemara says:
"Say that pork is delicious,"
but the Torah doesn't permit it.
By the strict definition
I obviously have less freedom.
but in many other terms,
community life, for instance.
I derive many things
that freedom can't give me.
They fight many things
such as loneliness
which is the number one
cause of suicide.
We see the statistics,
they don't lie.
people who live in a community
are less likely to commit suicide
and experience less depression.
So we're placing happiness.
if the absence of depression
can be defined as happiness.
up against freedom.
Freedom doesn't always win.
Of course I have restrictions.
Let's take the most trivial thing,
I don't have a driver's license.
which is very restrictive,
and I take care of the kids
so my freedom is restricted
twice over.
Yes, I use public transportation
and that's not easy.
Hassidim see a woman driving
as being very demonstrative
and masculine.
Sitting there and driving
is going too far.
Although women are leaders
in many positions,
driving is still considered taboo.
it's still an issue.
Okay, not everything is easy
I don't...
-Don't you ever wonder?
Yes, sometimes I wonder, '
in moments of self-examination.
as a Hassidic woman,
if I feel happy or comfortable*
And I always say to myself
that that issue may bother me
but ultimately,
when I put it all together,
okay, I don't understand everything.
It was the Rebbe of Kotzk
who said
that you don't want to follow
If you understand
everything he does.
he can't serve as a role model.
Kiryat Belz, preparations for
the wedding of the Rebbe's grandson
This is the tone..
And below it...
One, two, three.
Most Hassidim marry
at the age of 19
Couples get engaged at the age of 18
after three dates
After the engagement they don't meet
for a year until the wedding
"Go, my beloved, to greet..."
Close your mouths:
-..."the bride,
"We will greet the Sabbath..."
Today's lecture will be
about happiness.
in general and in married life.
Why is it so important
to study before marriage?
It's just like someone driving a car...
without a license
or a doctor opening a clinic
without having studied medicine.
In order to marry
and have a successful marriage,
we have to learn
and get to know the people involved
and what our obligations are.
what lies ahead.
And we'll learn all this, bit by bit,
until the wedding.
We have to realize
we go through a process
which is very fast at first.
In the past
grooms didn't receive counseling
before marriage
so people totally forgot
the basic customs
regarding man and wife.
They forget the Sages' instructions
about respecting one's wife,
"Love and respect her as yourself,"
and how you must avoid
"distressing one's wife"
and making her cry
and many other things the Sages said
about respecting one's wife.
as you heard from your counselors.
It answers the need
you mentioned before.
since, thank God,
our community has grown
and there are more Hassidim.
Everyone sometimes has
something to talk about,
questions, doubts,
and they need guidance or help.
Naturally the Rebbe can't deal with
his tens of thousands of Hassidim
and give them personal attention.
so he appoints group leaders.
What kind of problems come up?
The same problems everyone has...
Not problems, challenges.
One person's problem
is that he's studying something
he can't relate to and wants to know
if he can move on to something else.
or a student who needs advice
on how to pray better
and be a better Jew.
One wants advice on achieving
domestic harmony.
how to fill his house
with love and joy
so that the Divine Presence
dwells in his house. And so on.
So what happens now?
Bridegroom instructors such as myself
teach how to speak at home,
how to understand your partner.
and it's all true.
You must be willing to sacrifice
and give of yourself for her sake.
You may be good friends,
but you're the spiritual one!
We know, as we said last time.
that finding a mate is from God.
We're assigned our mates
40 days before we're conceived
and we know that marriage means
taking part in the act of creation
and we return to our primal state
in which God quarried us
from the Rock of Souls
before we came into the world,
and under the wedding canopy,
toy giving the wedding ring.
the souls reunite
and become one again.
With no one to defend
against the accuser
Speak words of law and justice
to Yaakov
Speak words of law and justice
Welcome..
I met my wife three times
before we were engaged.
And...
as long as the couple
is basically compatible
they can build a life together.
After three dates or less
you get engaged.
You don't see him for a year,
you see him all the time
from the women's section,
you observe him and learn his habits.
Does he look too?
-No way.
Sometimes he doesn't remember
what you look like.
Just kidding. Actually, it's possible.
But first you go through
a preparatory process.
I suppose it's scary,
it's scary for any couple.
knowing that the moment of truth
has come.
You really don’t know him
Knowing each other...
Even before that.
Hassidim get engaged
when they're very young,
at that age they can fall in love
just by looking at a photo.
even before they date.
I was 17.
What a privilege,
when you're 17 they tell you:
We've looked into everything
and made the rational choice for you.
What's "the rational choice"
The rational choice means...
we make rational choices
but with love
there are no rational choices.
With love we say:
This is what my heart tells me.
Why don't we say that
when we buy a house?
The roof leaks, but...
but I attach to it...
This is much more important
than buying a house.
My parents made
a perfectly rational choice.
They met the family.
They asked about the young man.
It's like buying a house,
but in this case
it's my partner for life.
And I'm a 17-year-old
who's prayed all her life
for a pious husband, a Torah scholar,
and I know that my mate
was assigned to me 40 days
before I was conceived.
And you ask the Rebbe.
A spiritual authority
gives his approval.
And I meet him to make sure
we're on the same page
and we can communicate.
This is a model
that makes no sense
in the liberal world.
but you have to realize that...
it's a winner.
He will bless the groom
and bride...
My son-in-law was about
the 100th young man
who came courting.
We checked them all out
and he was the most worthy.
Did you feel it on the first date?
Yes.
-Yes it was a lot of fun.
I don't know how it is
for other people.
maybe everyone feels a click
the first time they meet,
but on our first date
I felt something
You knew after the first date..
-No,
all I wanted was for him to want me.
I told my father: Chase down
his father... -Afterwards?
And tell him I want to
get married today.
I remember he came in
in the middle of the date and said:
That's enough, time's up.
Do boys feel the same?
They want to tie the knot
at such an early age? -Yes.
Really? -Yes.
Because men are more..
There's a powerful social influence.
That's how it goes,
in your first or second year
of yeshiva
the guys start getting married
one after another
and you want to get married, too.
You see friends
who are a year or two older
and they already have
a kid or two
and you can see yourself...
in the same position.
With this ring I do thee wed.
Mazel Tov!
May this be a good sign for us
and all Jews...
When you have your first misunderstanding,
your first quarrel.
your first tiff.
know that you've landed
in real life.
Because at first you think
love will conquer all
he's amazing.
You can't see any of his shortcomings.
You focus on the good,
which is good,
but suddenly all the bubbles burst
and Io and behold,
he has shortcomings.
And you have to understand him,
put yourself in his shoes.
It's a big change.
He's a yeshiva student.
who's only used to being
among boys.
he never saw women besides
his sisters and mother.
and suddenly he's living
with a woman, okay?
It's new to him.
She's his wife
and it's all pure and holy,
he's received guidance from his instructor.
but it's a big change for him
and you have to understand
that it's okay.
Sometimes he may feel
it's too much for him.
the home, the marriage.
He may run off to the synagogue
to study some Gemara,
that happens.
The wife usually finds
her refuge in her work.
Just realize that it's all normal
and all is well.
What can warm up the knife?
Hey, I know!
Maybe...
No matter how old you are,
when you get married
you realize what it involves.
you can't know what it's like
until you do it.
True. I told my instructor
after the wedding
that all the instruction before
the weeding is good and well.
but I think
there should be much less
pre-marriage instruction
and much more
post-marriage instruction
because before you're married
you don't understand.
you don't understand
what it's like to live with someone
in constant partnership.
It's not that you know
that it'll be complicated
and you don't know
how to approach it
so you have to learn.
You just don't know.
As she said,
they throw you in the deep end
and you start to swim
because you have to.
What about love?
What?
-Love.
it's there.
-I wish for all couples.
a love like we have.
There are a lot of positive things
about segregation.
I don't want to speak
in liberal terms and say: Yes,
segregation is all good,
because the segregation isn't done
for liberal reasons
or so that girls can excel.
It's done for religious reasons.
regardless of what the actual
religious law says.
There are demands made
of secular women
that are much more restrictive
and I don't want them. -Such as?
Such as,
when we go to a wedding
I dance with women.
I don't have to impress
any man in any way.
I feel incredibly free.
I don't even have to think about it.
As a Hassidic woman I see it
as a very impressive event.
The bride gets to dance with
all sorts of important people
and guests who made an effort to come.
to touching songs.
They won't touch her hand
because only her husband
will ever touch her.
So how do they dance before her
and create that bond?
The belt, the connecting cord.
is very meaningful
and it becomes
more and more impressive.
it's an impressive,
moving ceremony
and there are eulogies..
bringing up memories,
and everyone goes home happy.
We'll never forgo the ceremony.
It's not as if other women
have absolute freedom
and equality.
And of course with us
there is no absolute equality.
If we're talking about
a desire for equality.
it doesn’t exist.
I don't find equality and freedom
on the other side, on the contrary.
find it oppressive.
it tells women
how they should appear
at ceremonies
as opposed to how men
should appear
and she always has to be
a beautiful ornament
and I find that very oppressive.
It's objectifying in the same way that...
when people size up my skirt
to the last inch, it's just as objectifying
when I have to be pretty
for an event.
There are two sides to the coin.
I believe in equality
and I don't believe in essentialism.
I do believe that society tells you:
You should act this way
because you're male
and you should act this way
because you’re female.
And as a Haredi feminist
it's important to me that women have
a meaningful place,
they should know
more ritual law and Torah
and have a significant role
in serving God
and also to look at the things
that aren't laws but customs
that belong to a conservative society
and see where women
can be given more of a place
and how equality can be advanced
in those places.
The most amazing example of this
is the rabbi's wife who takes requests.
she's a real rebbe
and a pious role model
who's amazing by any standard
and you can learn about her.
But in many senses
we aren't there yet.
we're still only observers.
There are over 80,000 lawyers
in Israel. Aren't you concerned?
There's something unique about me,
I combine Jewish law
with Israeli law
and that's a rare combination
and I think I can make it work.
Don't stand in our way
and we'll do it big-time.
You asked if I'm proud.
I'm not proud, no.
Why not? You worked hard.
Yes and, thank God, I succeeded.
but I'd rather be proud of...
other things.
After all, law is just a profession.
And like someone who took a course
and earned an electrician's certificate
I don't know if he's proud,
it's just a profession
and a chance to make a living,
that's all, it doesn't make me
a different person.
It's my job, there's my job
and then there's me
and they're two different things.