King of the Road (2016-…): Season 1, Episode 8 - Serious Rock Vibes - full transcript

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---
Please do not attempt to perform
any of these stunts

Or activities in this show,

'cause they are super
dangerous --

Crazy, wild, dangerous.

The stunts seen are either
performed by professionals

Or under the supervision
of professionals.

Serious professionals.

This show
also contains bad language.

Man: Fuck, dude.

Man #2: What just happened?

He just fuckin', like,
cut his shit open really bad.



Oh, shit.

Somebody, like,
grab the van, we got to go!

Fuck, dude!

What the fuck!

Man #2: Mike, we're gonna
have to lift him.

Let me get the van over here.

Man, this is so fucked.

Fuck, dude.

Dude!

Hey, should we get an ambulance
over here or what?

God, how the fuck
does that happen, dude?

What the fuck?

Oh, dude!

I think there's --



-Where's the hospital?
-There's something --

Clint, you want
to get an ambulance?

Dude, there's something,
like, fucking in...

I didn't fucking wreck
that little-ass rail!

God damn it, dude!

-You're a piece of shit.
-Fuck you.

Dude, I was scared.

Woman: Oh!
Holy shit!

Dude, I saw the blood
and I felt sick, dude.

I thought I was gonna
fucking throw up.

-I fucking hate you.
-Fuck, dude!

So I'm just walking around
with this baggie of fake blood

In my fucking pants
around my dick.

Dude!

I thought you, like,
split your ball sack open, man.

Sorry, mike.

I knew you were gonna
be the most, like, distraught.

Sorry!
I fucking knew it.

Dude, that was so good.

God fucking damn it.
I fucking hate you.

♪ raw oysters, texas pete

♪ sea urchin on the reef

♪ sour cheeseburger bit to eat

♪ lick butter goes with keef

♪ into the cocoa leaf

♪ fresh maggots on my teeth,
they're cheap ♪

♪ oh, baby!

Berle: Took a minute
to figure out, like,

Even a trick
to even try,

But, yeah, it's a cool spot.

You just skate a rock, so...

I figured we come on over here
and give it a try.

Man: Oh.

-Wow!
-Oh, my god!

You got this, elijah.

-Oh.
-Yes!

This is going down right here.

Oh, my god.

Man: Wow.

-Dude.
-Fuck it.

That's the end
of the trip.

You know, we're all sick
of the bus, so...

I was thrilled

That I got to come here
and roll around in this ditch

For a few hours.

Those are some serious
rock vibes.

Something that wasn't
a fucking nine-stair

Or god damn, you know,
manual pad or something.

Oh, that's fucking -- later.

-Dude, that was so sick!
-Insane!

It's good to be home.

Burnett:
All right, so we're getting
into the home stretch.

They're getting back
to southern california,

Where most
of these guys are from.

They know where all
the spots are.

This is where a lot
of guys

Will have saved certain tricks
for southern california spots.

I have a feeling, like,
billy and blake for sure, like,

"I got a much better rail!

Why the fuck
would I do it here

On fucking blah,
blah," you know?

Fucking clueless.

At the same time, though,

They've been killing themselves
for 10 days.

It is the final jam,

But it's so tough
at the same time.

They're limping in.

-Ow!

Fuck, dude!

And this is when they need
to be doing the craziest stuff.

You've got to do it.
We need this.

Please.

You, show us your man tits!

Need help!

A jawbone.

A jawbone ham bone.

Yeah.
Does it look good?

Look close.

Davis: We are quite a ways
from fresno,

So we can take
our cowboy gear off.

Oh, yeah.

I think we might run the shirts
and the hat for a minute.

I'm keeping the pants
on for sure.

Yeah.

Good night, clint.

Kirchart:
I always wanted to do a
king of the road,

But the birdhouse team
was just hungry.

They just want
to win very badly.

I felt like a little distant

Because I didn't
have that hunger.

'cause I'm kind of like,
pretty quiet and to myself.

And I think, at first,
they thought

I would be all involved and,

Like, they gave me
the book right away.

Like, I think that was the first
thing they did in the van.

Like, they were very excited
for me to look at the book

And just like be like,
"oh, yeah, I can do all these."

And I was just like,

"I hate to be the one
to break it to these guys,

I'm not gonna do any of these."

Towards the end,
it was just like,

"just along for the ride."

So then it became,

"okay, jaws has to do them all
to get the mvp,

Then he's all the more willing."

Ha.

Very gnar.

Homoki: One of the challenges
is get a trick off the rock.

And you get an extra 50 points

If you do, like,
the best trick off the rock.

So I'm gonna try to see if
I can tail drop off this rock,

Down to that.

Kirchart:
I guess I've never seen
someone skate like jaws.

It's pretty incredible
watching someone like that.

They were things
you could tell

He didn't want to do
that were kind of, like,

I'm not gonna
say life-threatening,

But, like, you know,
something bad can happen.

But he can break that barrier

And just do it out of will,

I guess.

Homoki:
All right, ready.

-Oh!
-Damn!

Homoki:
I just ripped my shirt
and I hurt my elbow.

All right.

Fuck!

Sorry.

Oh, shit!

Oh.

Trying again.

All right, right here,
right here!

Whoo!

-Fuck yeah.
-Give me that jamba, baby!

Hell yes.

My dog.
Yeah.

-Always winning.
-Hell yeah, baby.

- You're so tasty.

Fuck, dude.

Man: All the meat.

All the meat, right.

Oh, my god.

Oh, yep.

Oh, there we go.

It's like a turtle.

Oh, fuck me.

Yesterday, we did all
of our city challenges

At woodward.

Yeah, steve.
Yeah!

And demo-ed some heavy ones.

Oh, dude,
I just puked.

But we got some empty pages
in the book.

As good as you feel
about the ones

That are almost full,

Those empty ones are daunting,

And these should be
our biggest days.

All right,
back to me, big dog.

-Yeah, floppy!
-Smooth like butter, player.

My man.

Yep. Easy.

All right, first try,
we got fucking rope.

Rogers:
Eli is a beast.

A decade ago,
he was 11 or 12 at the time.

He was a little kid

That I kind of had
some type of endearment towards

'cause
I thought he was cool.

One time, we were
at the santa monica courthouse,

And he broke his board,

And I drove him back to the shop

And gave him a new board.

It was a girl board, actually,
and he rides for chocolate now.

It's kind of funny
that that turned out

To be what it was.

And he's grown
into a different --

He's a different type of skater
than he was then.

Yeah, dude.

-Fuckin' boss, dude.
-Wow, dude.

Rogers: He's grown into,
like, a beast.

He's one of these guys

Who'll just
fucking attack something

Without a lot of thought.

Elijah is fuckin'
putting it down right now.

Checking checks, player.

Checking checks.

At the other stair-rail
in l.A...

When my body is cooperative.

My body will be better then.

Talk to me when you're 30, eli.

Today is Saturday.

That means I can put a shirt on.

Feels weird.

Wasn't someone
saying there was a seven-stair?

-Yeah.
-Does someone have that pinned?

Yep.

Can you direct me
or give it to me?

I'll send it
to you right now.

Can you stop
being an asshole?

I'm not being an asshole.

You're being an asshole.

Me and billy, we've traveled
across the world together

For the past 15 years.

Man:
You just said --

There's a red rail that

Who knows
if anybody will like it.

So there's nobody
that I've been in the van

With longer than billy marks.

Understand.
Perfect.

What are you even
talking about right now?

What are you talking about
right now?

I'm just talking
to myself, dude.

We bicker, fight,
insult each other.

All right, well,
you better shut the fuck up...

If you think
you're talking about me.

Billy motherfucking marks,
50 points, roast beef.

Is that
what you're bragging about?

Don't look at me
like I was doing shit,

You fat piece of shit.

Congratulations,
you got two things.

It's always something
with bill or me.

Sad piece of shit.

Ready?

What's going on right now?

I'm taking a shit.

We had the best
mystery guest.

He went so hard.
He did everything that he could.

No shame.

Well, now
I got to throw it out.

Just ass out,
shit in the van.

Killed it.

He did some good tricks.

Throw it out.

Hold on, I got to film it.
I just threw it out, dude!

Hey, now let me out
and just let me wipe my ass.

Sinclair:
Forrest, there's a child.

There's a child,
forrest.

There's a child.

What?

I didn't do anything.

Oh.
Oh, my god!

-That smelled --
-and all of a sudden, I just...

That smelled so bad,
dude.

That was awful.

And then we had to pull over,

And forrest's ass
was hanging out

And there was a child
walking by.

Man:
No fucking way.

It was terrible
in every level possible.

150 points, though.

Go left.
Go left.

No, park in here!

Sinclair:
We finally made it.

These guys think that this one's
the best nine-stair

That they can think of
currently.

We got four days left

And we only got two
out of the 12 tricks

On the nine-stair challenge.

I think
they're gonna knock out a --

Quite a few in there right now.

And dan lu
attempted the losi grind,

Which is that one,

But he battled it straight
on the van in seattle...

Fuck!

...And didn't get it, so maybe
he can get a redemption here.

Points, points, points,
points, points.

More points!

Man:
Whoo-hoo!

Whoo!

That is how it's done.

Bla-cation.

Yeah!

Sinclair:
Frontside nosegrind landing
on top of another board,

That's not a trick people
really set out to do.

That's terrible to try.

Oh, that was --

It's just a challenge,
so you can get really fucked up.

So might as well save it
for one of the last days,

In case you
twist an ankle or --

Hopefully you don't,

And just get lucky and ride
away.

Yeah!

It's got to be, like,
right here, right?

Yeah, maybe a little more
over this way

So that he lands
grind on it.

And just a little bit
past the line.

So stoked once more, bro.

Man: The board wiggled
in between his wheels.

Yeah!

Axel is top-notch.

I give him a 10 out of 10
on this trip.

He's trying his ass
off, he's killing it.

He's making tricks, he's getting
along with everybody.

I haven't seen
him get upset once.

No one's,
like, turned off by axel.

I think everybody's in awe,
like, "wow, he's fucking good."

I'm gonna let you
mark this one.

Right there, it's the uh,
"frontside nosegrind landing

With your board
on top of another board."

One.

What is this here?

That's a five.

Is this euros?

Dude, I can't
write right now.

You drew
an upside down "v."

1-5-0 is how you do it.

Boom.

It's a good day.
It's a good fucking day.

Virgin moves.

This is a pretty steep
hill right here.

Gonna be great.

Are we on top
of the hill?

We're on top, baby.

Middle of nowhere,
huge dirt bomb.

God.
Hard shredding now!

Man: Oh, my god.

Wow.

that's insane.

That was fucking insane.

♪ don't tell me to smile

♪ because it might
never happen ♪

♪ I just wait a little while

Burnett:
Southern california has
the best sets of stairs,

The best handrails.

I think there's gonna be a lot
of finishing moves

These last few days,

A lot of the highest,
longest, most.

This is where it's gonna
get kind of crazy.

♪ I got a bad,
bad feeling ♪

♪ every day,
I almost die ♪

Yeah!

Yes, dude!

This is it.
This is the crunch.

This is the final
of the nba.

This is the super bowl,
the last three days.

Ricardo.

Brother.

Man: Ahh.

Johnny, my man.

Hell yeah!

Dude, jereme better
fucking skate today.

Yeah, he better, dude.
Fuck.

Berle: When jereme
came down the stairs

At the meet-up point,
it was a lot of --

A lot of mixed emotions.

Oh, my god!

But it ended up being cool,
dude.

Like, he was not the fucking
big cocky rapper dude

I thought he was gonna be.

And then he turned out
to be...

A pretty down-to-earth dude.

No.

Dude, you can just
hit a stair.

I think you can do slow
and just go

Jereme,
you got this one.

That was it right there,
baby!

Collect that 50 right there.

Fuck yeah, sherm!

Sherm!
Bang bang!

We were kind
of a little nervous,

You know,
like what --

How much effort he was gonna
be putting into it.

But he came in swinging, dude.

♪ got me pacing the floor
at night ♪

Fuck!

♪ about to walk an extra mile

♪ keeping me here
for all the wrong reasons ♪

Big dog.

♪ I can see it
in your smile ♪

Still got it.

♪ emotions
taking over now ♪

♪ asking you to come home

That's it.

♪ remind you of our happiness

♪ no one wants to be alone

♪ no, no

♪ don't leave me hanging on
-hanging on ♪

♪ in and out of love

I'm stoked we had jereme
as our guest, dude.

Wouldn't have picked
any other ex-girl employee.

It's insane, dude.

♪ don't leave me hanging on

Man: Gnarly.

Whoa.

♪ in and out of love

♪ in and out of love

♪ yeah, don't leave me, baby

That's incredible!

♪ in and out of love

Vitetta:
Microphone check.

Testicle left,
testicle right.

Man: Oh.

Next one,
he'll have it.

Dude, that is
so fucking gnarly.

It is gnarly.

In the girl-chocolate video,
"pretty sweet,"

Elijah did the wallie
up the back of this rail

To nose bluntslide down it.

I think when he saw
pole jam over a rail,

This obviously
popped into his mind right away.

-Hello, glow.
-Johnny blowing up.

Hit it sideways.

Fuck.
That was it!

Whoo!

-Damn.
-That was so fucking g.

Man:
He's gnarly, dude.

That fool deserves the fucking
gnarly award.

He's the gnarliest.

♪ there's no surviving on this
island if you're trying ♪

♪ so go mining for a diamond --
don't deny it, I don't mind ♪

♪ but the moment that you even
think of lying to a lion ♪

♪ is the same exact moment
you'll be dying -- show time. ♪

♪ show time

♪ yeah --
show time ♪

Rogers:
That is so hard to do.

I would not want to go
at that that fast.

Vitetta: Yeah, buddy.

Fucking mvp, dude.

Making the squad
look good.

One, two, three, four,
five, six, seven.

25.

Yeah, baby.

Man:
How old are you?

I'm 25.

So we found a rail
with the same age.

Man: Yeah, aaron.

-Ow -- ouch.
-You all right?

Yeah.

This is the first rail
that we've been at

That's matched one
of our ages.

And johnny's manning
up and handling it.

He's 19,
the stairs are 19,

So -- meant to be.

It's pretty scary.

I'm picturing myself do it.

And I don't want to do it.

Vitetta: That's team effort.
That's good teammates.

Nice.

Sorry.

Don't worry, dude.

Like...

Take your time.

Oh, johnny,
you got it.

Man:
Fuck, yeah.

♪ hey, man what's the use?

♪ cracking up

♪ how 'bout you

-Ow.
-You okay?

Yeah, just penetrated
my butt cheek.

♪ rolling on

Yeah.

Vitetta:
K-o-t-r, motherfuckers!

Johnny motherfucking jones.

♪ is it all in my head

Ooh!

Man: You okay?

-Whoo, yeah, johnny!
-Yeah, johnny!

Johnny, that was
a good one, dude.

♪ turn it off

Dude,
this is so tight.

♪ turn it on

♪ are you right?

-You all right?
-That was crazy.

Damn, dude.

♪ got it all in my head

Man:
That's fucking right, baby!

-Fuck yeah!
-Whoo!

-Fuck yeah, aaron!
-Yes!

I can't even believe it.

That's the biggest rail
I've ever grinded.

Man: So sick,
and it's tall as fuck, too!

No wood, no nothing,
y'all got up on that ass!

Check.

Whoo!

-Yeah, johnny.
-Yeah, johnny.

Fuck!

You all right?

Oh, damn.

Oh, god.

-Oof.
-Oh, fuck you!

Fuck!

You all right?

Fuck, man.

Oh, god.

Jesus fucking christ.

You got away from that one
better than you should have.

-Yeah, johnny.
-Fuck yeah, dog.

Johnny, johnny!

Man: Chested the thing.

Jones: That was like
the worst slam I had so far.

Dude, you're the fucking --
you're a trooper, dude.

Unless someone breaks something,

I don't know
how there could be another slam.

Dude, that was so fucked.

It's like a nine-year-old
birthday party's

Fucking jumping off
right now.

There's,
like, every parent

Got their kid scooters
for christmas, and they --

They're just trying them out
for the first time right now.

Ha ha.
Hi.

Hi, hi, hi, hi.

This sucks.

This is bad.

I tried to bail, but...

Marks:
Everyone wants to win,

But if we win, I don't think
chocolate will be bummed,

And if chocolate wins,
we won't be bummed.

If birdhouse wins,
everyone's gonna be bummed.

So it's pretty much toy machine
and chocolate versus birdhouse.

♪ oh, anita had a car

♪ and she liked the way
I played guitar ♪

♪ she gave me a little wine,
too ♪

♪ and she loved too hard

Yeah!

♪ oh, I said some things
that I can't take back ♪

♪ 30 days on the road
is 30 days of living hard ♪

Man: Oh!

Man: Oh!

No!

Pretty long.

You want to see how many vans
it is to the top?

Yeah, sure.

All right,
count them off.

-Good?
-Two, three, four...

27, 28, 29...

66, 67 --

67 and a quarter.

We're gonna do the math.
We're gonna measure the shoe.

Hey, what size
shoe are you wearing?

Lutheran:
I wear a nine.

I'm gonna google
"how long is a size nine shoe?"

10.5 long
for a size nine foot.

So 10.5 times...

Times what,
67 and a quarter?

Yeah, 67 and a quarter.

Divide by 12.

It's 58.84, so we're
going with 59 feet long.

Longest board slide.

I'm calling.

Fuck!

All right,
let's see what we got here.

Large rail, no.

Small rail.

Man: Get it, mike.

Oh!
Oh.

So we're at this rail --

This really a low
six-stair rail.

The back's angled up
so it's good for clive

To do the wallie
the rail over the stairs.

♪ when we come out there
we'll be wrapped in a blanket ♪

♪ when we come out there
we'll be wrapped up in sheets ♪

I kind of feel like
I was the one

Kind of like
disappointing everyone.

But then I saw the impossible
lip slide,

And I was just like, "I think
I might be able to do this one."

Case: Heath kirchart,
he's got class.

He's respected by every single
person in skateboarding.

Like, everybody says he's
your favorite skater's skater.

Just having heath
at a spot with us is, like...

Is sick.

Pole jam over the back by clive.

Impossible lip slide,
heath -- 50.

Yo, we got grease.

Grease it up.

Oh, no!

That shit's fucking --
let's see it.

Man, why do I have to be the one
to do it?

You're the fucking captain.

I know,
that's the thing.

I'm just the one
that does all the asshole shit!

-Fuck yeah.
-All right.

You just pranked
the whole team, fucker.

I guess I'm always the one

That's trying to do
some shit that are people

Are either gonna
be really psyched on

Or really bummed on,
it seems like.

Gonna hook them up
with some grease.

You know it's a competition.
I know we want to win,

So we got the ideal crew
of people, you know,

That want to win
and aren't lazy,

And, you know,
we don't really give a fuck.

Those bottom
spots are actually perfect.

They're, like, right
where you would land.

We might be fucking
with them, or whatever,

And they probably don't like me,
but that's fine.

I don't really care
if they like me or not.

Fuck them.

Man: All right.

Jerky came through, dude.

Yeah, yeah, it's great.

This is taylor.

Hi.
I'm taylor.

Uh, how does anyone
know anyone?

I was like hyped up to twerk.

I was like,
"five minutes,

Just give me five minutes,
I'll be there,"

And I was ready to go.

The twerk life chose me.

It really did.

I didn't choose it.

-Okay.
-This is our goal right here.

-Hell yeah.
-What's your name?

-Jackie.
-Jackie?

-Thank you, jackie.
-This is aaron.

-Aaron.
-He goes by jaws, though.

Yeah, that's jaws.

The idea is that he's gonna
off the roof of the van,

And you're gonna be
in front of it.

Up here maybe?

-It'll be like this.
-Like this.

He'll be right here.
How about right here.

Scoot as much
over that way.

Yeah, yeah,
you're good like that.

Yes.
Like, that's perfect!

That's perfect.

Thrasher is cutting edge.

We keep our finger
on the pulse of youth culture.

So if twerking is in,

We're gonna put it in
king of the road, all right?

That's what you young
people want, right?

Twerking?

Get it, aaron.

Come on, baby!

Oh, my god, dude!

Dude, yeah, she is killing it.

Do it, baby!

It's just a little just --
just a little like when it --

Just a little something.

Let -- let -- let me
back up a second.

I'm sorry that every encounter

With a woman
on king of the road

Seems to be so god damn creepy.

For those of you
who think

That king of the road
is moronic,

You're not wrong.

Somehow, when you get a bunch
of dudes together in the van,

This is the kind
of stuff that happens.

You're a good kisser.

We didn't set out to do this.

There are many,
many talented women skaters.

We've had them participate
on king of the road.

And they haven't had to twerk
or skate naked or pole dance

Or anything especially weird.

I'd like to think
that somehow

King of the road
is just a mirror to society --

A stupid, filthy mirror.

Whoo!
Get it, baby!

Get it, aaron.

It couldn't be better than this.

You're the man,
johnny.

Whoa.

Yeah, johnny!

I think we need
another one.

Woman: Come on, jaws!
Come on, jaws!

-Oh, dude, that was it.
-Fuck!

Rogers: Just don't look
at what you see on the way down.

Yeah, jon-jon!

Yeah, johnny!

Fuck yeah, johnny!
Whoo-hoo!

-Oh, fuck!

-Oh, dude!

One more try, little buddy!

Jackie,
can you feel that connection?

No, we're good, don't worry!

Yeah, right here.

Ready, baby!

Send it in!

Oh, my god!

-Yes!
-Fuck yes!

-Fuck yeah, aaron!
-Damn!

Aaron, that is fucking
crazy, dude!

Oh, my god!

He put the team on his back.

Put the team on my ass.

So happy.

We're done.
It's done.

Now I got to
give her a hug.

Whoo!

Thank you so much.

That's a wrap, baby!

America's twerkers...

We salute you.

Tucker...

Fuck, yeah, eli.

Rogers:
We are at a famous skate spot.

We're at a nine-stair rail,

And elijah's gonna
try a nosegrind

And land on another board
and ride away.

That's it!

Burnett:
Okay, so last year,

It was kick flip down
a set of stairs and land

On top of another board
and ride away.

We'd never seen this happen.

I didn't even know
if it would work.

And nyjah did it,

And it was like a holy cow!

It was another king
of the road miracle,

You know, like, we put
this dumb stuff in the book,

And you're like, "I don't know
if that's gonna work.

I don't know if anyone's
gonna try it."

So after that, we're like,

"okay, what can we do this year

Where you land
with one board

On top of another board
and ride away?"

And we're like,
"got to take it to a hand rail."

This is the board
I'm setting up for eli to...

Conquer this feat.

Dude, it's crazy, brother.

-He's got to have --
-a thousand points?

I was gonna say
"a thousand," dude.

First fucking try.
Right here, eli.

Man:
Fuck yeah, elijah.

He's a fucking
machine, dude.

It's a little scary.

Rogers:
So right on it.

Burnett:
This year, we also added
a pop shove-it down stairs

Landing on top of another board.

I don't really know
if it's possible.

Any time
you want to test the limits

Of what people are willing to do

And what is physically capable,
it's king of the road.

I'm excited to see
if they can do it.

Right here, eli.

Want some, get some!

Man:
You fucking animal, dude.

Yeah!
That's a make, baby!

I rolled away.
I landed on the board,

And I fucking rolled away.

Fuck!

-Fuck yeah.
-You're gonna get it.

This is gonna be the right one.

Right here, bud.

Fuck yeah, eli.

Oh, that's it!

Oh, yeah!

-Elijah.
-Fuck that, dude.

That was fucked.

Fuck yeah, berle.

Dude, eli.

-Crazy!
-Crazy, man.

One, two, three, four.

Oh, look!
You're out, dude!

-My spot.
-What's that?

-Who did?
-I'm assuming birdhouse.

-Oh, they greased us.
-Yeah.

We got oil tracks?

-They greased us.
-Are you kidding me?!

They greased us good.

You're just gonna track
it all over the place, man?

Only the jockiest
of the jocks would do this.

Birdhouse.

Hey, good thing you fucking
pole-jammed that rail,

'cause the birdhouse dudes went
and fucked it up for everyone.

How whack is that?

That's a fucking spot,
man.

Like, why you got to do that?
Weak.

Fuck you, birdhouse.

Especially you,
clint walker, you little fuck.

Fucking man-bunned
piece of shit.

Let's get the wood.
Fuck that.

♪ well, I'm saving up my money

♪ trying to buy
transcendental meditation ♪

♪ 'cause lately all my...

I mean, you got to
give it to them, though,

It's a good fucking move.

But we're not gonna lose
to a bunch of fucking jocks.

Come on.

I wonder who touched this
with their fingers.

♪ I can't find my mantra, babe

♪ I know that everything
will be all right ♪

Yeah, they do, 'cause
they're sore fucking losers,

And when we kick the shit
out of them,

It's all fucking good.

Yep.
Didn't work, guys.

Collin came here,

Pole-jammed
down the six-stair faster

Than I could book
a hotel for the evening.

And it probably took the clowns

Longer than that
to great the shit up.

You're not gonna stop us.

You're not gonna
fucking stop us.

Give me my beer.

On the next
"king of the road"...

Should I just fucking wing one?

Trying to die.

Look out!

-Come on!
-Fuck yeah.

Whoo!

Check!

-Sell the land!
-Save it!