King of the Road (2016-…): Season 1, Episode 1 - Let the Madness Begin - full transcript
The scavenger hunt books are handed out and the teams are on their way.
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---
Please do not attempt to perform
any of these stunts
Or activities in this show.
They are super-dangerous --
crazy, wild dangerous.
The stunts seen are either
performed by professionals
Or under the supervision
of professionals.
Serious professionals.
This show
also contains bad language.
Come on, baby, hold on!
Hold on, baby!
♪
-Dude, this is insane.
-Aah!
We gonna go in the helicopter?
Hell, yeah!
Get in, baby!
-Get in, baby!
-Yeah, man.
[ indistinct chatter ]
I love the smell of napalm
in the morning!
You got this!
-[ laughs ]
-[ laughs ]
-Yeah!
-Holy shit.
[ indistinct chatter ]
Yeah!
♪
[ black lips' "raw meat" plays ]
Whoo!
♪ raw oysters, texas pete
♪ sea urchin on the reef
2015 king of the fucking road!
Thrasher magazine's
skateboarding scavenger hunt.
♪ lick butter goes with keef
Are you guys
ready to fucking battle?
♪ into the cocoa leaf
yeah!
Three teams of top skaters
battling it out
To accomplish
amazing stunts and challenges.
Whoo!
This year, we have chocolate...
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
...Toy machine,
And the defending champs,
birdhouse.
[ grunts ]
♪ oh, baby
Fuck yeah!
♪
They go from city to city
for 13 days,
Documenting every crazy trick
To bone-crushing slams.
♪ sweet bread's
my favorite treat ♪
-Ohh.
-Ohh.
-Oh!
-Ohh!
It's just like the scavenger
hunt of all times.
Hey, do a trick barefoot.
Making some mayhem
out in the streets.
♪ fresh onions on my leaf
-aah!
-Whoo-hoo!
♪ horseradish with horse meat
♪ sea urchin,
ocean skeet to you ♪
"wet your pants
in a crowded place."
-I got that.
-[ laughs ]
You guys need
to fucking step up!
Hey, hey!
I'm getting a little
fucking sick of --
I'm sorry for hitting --
[ laughs ]
♪
♪ oh, baby
[ cheers and applause ]
when the dust settles,
The team who's done
the gnarliest stunts
Is gonna be crowned
king of the road.
[ liquid trickles ]
[ skateboard approaching ]
[ birds chirping ]
Jake!
Phelper!
♪
Let's do a practice inside.
We just gotta
figure it out.
Burnett: King of the road
starts tomorrow,
So we're here in seattle.
And we're gonna go check out
marginal way,
The famous skate park
under the bridge
Where the teams
are gonna meet up.
And we're gonna get jake phelps
and andy roy down there
'cause they're gonna help mc
this thing.
[ andy cackles ]
Jake phelps is the longtime
editor at "thrasher" magazine.
He's a walking encyclopedia
of skateboarding knowledge.
He's got a photographic memory.
He calls it like he sees it.
He's a loose cannon.
None of your god damn business,
fucker.
[ laughter ]
He loves skateboarding,
And he's kind of
like the strong man of thrasher.
I don't care.
I was fucking with you. Come on.
And then we got andy roy.
[ whistling ]
Boo! Aah!
Burnett: We've never
had andy host before.
Here we go.
He's been on "king of the road"
before with antihero.
King of the road.
Burnett:
He is just an original gnarler.
-All right!
-And he's a hype man.
There's nobody
more hype than andy.
Roy: Whoo!
Big, jordy!
It don't get no better
than that. Man!
We're gonna kick this thing off
With a few challenges
and do a dry run.
I got a little script
we can practice.
Okay.
The points you want to hit.
"welcome to king of the road.
We got 3 teams,
13 days,
We're gonna go city to city,
And you gotta bust
the best tricks.
You gotta film this shit."
50 grand?
No one told me.
Yeah, and you will be
king of the road.
And bragging rights
for next year.
Yeah.
We'll just practice.
So, I'm --
♪ hey, oh
You gotta go
where we tell you,
And then we'll see you
in san diego.
All right.
No. No.
Don't -- don't say any cities.
They don't know
where they're going.
All right.
Burnett: There's a little bit
of cat herding with these guys.
The front side, back side.
You get better moments
When it's, like,
not so planned out.
We'll see what happens.
♪
Vitetta: We are in seattle,
Skate park meeting point,
all the teams.
We're gonna start
the competition.
[ speaking indistinctly ]
♪
Burnett: This is the 11th year
we've done king of the road.
This year, the teams
are toy machine, chocolate,
And the defending champions,
birdhouse.
It's gonna be
a really good showdown.
Fisheye on, fisheye off.
It's "king of the road."
All right, let's do this.
Man:
Your turn right here, all right?
Burnett:
Chocolate, they're kind of
like a legacy team.
It really is a family,
And it's really hard
to get on the team.
Raven tershy,
He's like one of the best
bowl skaters in the world.
Powerful on the board,
kind of a showman,
But then he can also put it down
in a backyard pool.
He can street skate, too,
which makes him a triple threat.
Tershy: Just gotta stay healthy
and stay motivated
'cause you get sore real fast.
Got a good night's sleep
last night
[claps hands] ready to go.
Perez: I been here one time
when they were just building it.
Fucking gnarly.
Burnett:
And then we've got stevie perez.
Goes by the nickname "flacco."
He's like a classic l.A.
Street skater.
Always ripping...
-Oh!
-Oh!
...Unless he's sleeping.
-Yeah!
Burnett: He can be goofy,
but he's also passionate.
Aah.
I just want to be on trips
with the homies.
[ cheers ]
Everyone is getting gnarly,
you know.
Everyone's just, "go for it."
[ laughs ]
[ shouts indistinctly ]
Burnett:
And then we have elijah berle,
Who's known for being
able to shred everything.
Bowls, concrete, terrain,
a handrail chomper.
I think they're definitely
gonna be looking to him...
[ cheers ]
...To knock out a lot
of the tricks.
He's got the fucking spirit.
There's a really good chance
He'd be one of the mvps,
for sure.
Berle: You pretty much
just skate all day
And all night
for the next two weeks.
That was it.
It's not for everybody.
How you doing?
Chocolate's got a new guy
this year, johnny jones.
He's a scrappy ripper
from south central los angeles.
Jones:
I haven't traveled too much
outside of l.A.
Actually, I used to always watch
"king of the road,"
And it's a dream
come true for me.
Burnett: He's like a flow rider
for chocolate,
Which means he's not
on the team yet.
"king of the road"
is gonna be a big test for him.
Justin eldridge.
Even though he's not that old,
He's kind of the veteran
of the team.
Manuals, technical ledge stunts.
He's been on "king of the road"
a few times.
He's got tricks,
And he's gonna be
getting these guys hyped.
[ cheers and applause ]
Just try to keep it positive.
We have the sickest lineup.
Everybody has their strengths,
and [exhales forcefully]
This one's gonna be fun.
Burnett:
They're gonna be hard to beat.
-Whoo!
-Whoo!
[ froth's "lost my mind" plays ]
And then we've got toy machine.
-Right on.
-Marginal way skatepark.
I think we get the, uh,
king of the road handbook.
Guess we're about
to find out.
Billy's already pissed.
Burnett: Toy machine
is ed templeton's company.
These guys like to have fun,
And they like to get deadly
on the streets.
♪
Billy marks is the veteran
of this lineup.
The trick machine,
and he's also super funny.
Marks: Whatever I can do
to get everyone hyped,
I'm gonna do it.
I don't want to wipe shit
on my leg,
But I mean, if I have to,
I might have to just do it
to get the points.
We're in seattle.
Burnett: Daniel lutheran,
mr. Sunshine,
Has grinded
some of the biggest rails
In the history of skateboarding.
Lutheran: Being on toy machine,
it's the best.
Just a weird family.
I love it.
It means the most to me
to have a home like that.
Our crew's so solid,
it's anybody's game.
Burnett:
Collin provost, "the spider,"
He's one of the baddest dudes.
A lot of good times
and a lot of torture.
Burnett: He's a lanky master
of all terrain.
And the dude can bounce higher
than almost anybody.
Toy machine's bringing along
euro flow sensation
Axel cruysberghs.
He's from belgium.
I don't even know
if the whole team
Has met axel at this point,
So it's gonna be interesting
to see how he can hang.
I'm not sure what's in the book
and stuff,
What we have to do,
so we'll see.
I feel like,
since I'm the flow guy,
They're gonna give me
all the stupid shit to do.
Axel, I don't even
know who that is.
Like, I've seen him once.
I don't know what he can do.
We're here in the bowl.
Lastly, we got blake carpenter.
His switch game is insane.
The dude can ollie the house.
He's actually one
of the best amateurs
In skateboarding right now.
Carpenter:
Birdhouse is, like,
Really gnarly
with this competition.
They're warriors,
but we're gonna try to do
What we can
to take 'em down, I guess.
-Yeah, I know.
-Yeah, I know. This is tight.
Man: A lot of pressure, guys.
A lot of pressure.
Burnett: Last but not least,
we've got birdhouse.
They are the defending champs,
presently going for a threepeat.
-Ready, jerome?
-Let's have some fun.
Birdhouse is tony hawk's
company.
He's sending a battalion
of underdog shredders.
First,
you got aaron "jaws" homoki.
Man: Yeah!
This guy is a freak of nature.
Homoki:
I like to jump down big things.
That's my specialty
in this game. [ laughs ]
-Let's do this!
-It means a lot of pain.
-Oh!
-He's taken the biggest drops
In the history of skateboarding
and lived to tell.
Then you got clive dixon --
Everybody's good buddy.
The dude can jump
on some big rails,
And he's ready
to back his teammates up,
No matter what.
I'm down for whatever.
Last year,
I didn't shit in a toilet
Or use a toilet at all
for 12 days.
Like, I don't know,
anything that needs to be done.
Oh, this is a sick spot.
Burnett: Ben raybourn, he looks
like your paperboy from 1955.
He can do every transition trick
that has ever been invented.
He's one of the best
in the world
At that kind of skating.
Next up,
they got "silent" mike davis.
He's a technical wizard.
Davis:
All the guys are so rad.
They're all like
my best friends.
I want to do good.
I wouldn't want to be on a team
With other guys
that, like, don't really care.
Burnett: And then you got
The unofficial captain
of birdhouse, clint walker.
He's a good guy,
an awesome skater,
But he's got a hell of a temper.
He smashed people's windshield
out with a rock last year.
Nobody wants to win
"king of the road"
as bad as him.
I've always been
pretty competitive,
And, uh, I don't know.
I don't really
like to lose at anything,
Really, so I'll do whatever.
Burnett:
Toy machine and chocolate,
they've got the talent.
It's gonna be really hard
to beat birdhouse.
Walker:
Not many predictions.
Uh, definitely, it'll be crazy.
Hopefully, it's equally as crazy
as every other year
'cause that's what's fun
about it, I think.
Burnett: Marginal way,
this thing's lumpy.
It's not perfect.
It's not some x games course,
everything measured out.
This is gonna be sick.
Raybourn: We've been on two
"king of the roads" before this,
And usually, they only have
a halfway meet-up point
And then a meet-up point
at the end.
Has that ever happened?
-What?
-Beginning meet-up?
-Never.
Never happened in all of
"king of the road,"
So it's really crazy
going into this first thing
And having the, like,
"oh, fuck you," going already.
It's playful,
and we're friends in the end,
But for now, it's "fuck you."
[ train whistle blows ]
♪
Phelps: Is it on?
Can you guys hear this?
[ cheers ]
all right, guys!
Welcome to thrasher magazine's
2015 king of the fucking road!
[ cheers and applause ]
Are you ready to rock?
Yes!
-Whoo!
The three teams selected are...
The toy machine.
The chocolate mafia,
And the defending champion,
birdhouse!
These three teams
are gonna go rambo
Towards the finish line
And make the most ultimate
skateboard road trip.
[ cheers and applause ]
The first things
you're gonna do today...
Oh.
Sorry.
-What do they get?!
-Oh, what do you get?
Burnett:
What do they get?!
[ laughter ]
okay, at the end of the rainbow,
You get the trophy,
the cheddar,
50 grand,
And the cover
of thrasher magazine.
[ cheers ]
Ladies and gents,
here's andy roy.
Take it to another level,
andy.
All right, all right!
Who's got the meanest 360 flip?
I need one dude from each team.
-That's you, john.
Who's got the best
360 flip?
Step it up right now.
Phelps: One of you guys.
Who's got the money?
-Billy, toy machine!
-Billy marks!
-Elijah, chocolate!
-Elijah berle!
Birdhouse! Mike?
All right, we got this.
All right.
-Holy shit!
-Wow.
-Whoever...
-Pay attention, fuckers!
...Can put the board together
the fastest...
Everybody.
...And do a 360 flip
And snap the fucking board
in half --
I want two pieces!
And you guys
are gonna be blindfolded!
Fuck, yeah!
♪
Go, go, go!
Billy!
Get it!
Get it, get it, get it!
Phelps: Come on, mike!
Roy: Trick or treat.
Get done,
get done, get done!
Man: By your left knee,
by your left knee!
Grab that pack.
Come on, man!
You've been doing this
your whole fucking life!
-You should give up!
-[ laughs ]
Build it!
You guys better hurry!
There's two wheels
right below you.
Seriously,
too much weed, bro.
-Ah.
-He's got four right here.
-Billy's handling it right now.
-Second truck.
[ indistinct chatter ]
-Yeah, billy!
-Whoa!
And billy's the first one
to set the board up.
Here we go!
This is what
you get paid to do!
♪
Mike's almost there!
Elijah's still in last!
Yeah!
Yeah! Yeah!
Yeah!
Snap that motherfucker!
Snap it!
Sinclair:
I can't break it.
Go!
-Fuck.
-Holy shit!
-You picked the wrong board!
-Are you kidding me?
Come on, billy.
It's right there.
Head butt it!
Head butt it!
Elijah can't break
the board!
Head butt!
Head butt!
Your girlfriend cheated
on you!
Fucking get pissed!
What have you got?
What have you got?
What's in store?
Come on, mike!
Come on, mike!
Get it!
Yeah!
Yeah! Yeah!
Yeah!
Roy: Get it!
-We have a winner!
-Two pieces!
The winner!
-With 100 points, toy machine!
-That looks so god damned hard.
-That was fucking hard.
Aah!
-Yes!
-Whoo-hoo-hoo!
Billy killed it.
Phelps: All right, guys.
Rock 'em, sock 'em,
and roll 'em!
I want each team
to pick one rider
For a death-defying
skateboard race.
Toy machine.
-Provost!
-Spider!
Ray ray and raybourn.
All you guys come up here.
-Let's mad max 'em.
-Spider, come over here.
You guys, first rule of this is,
there's no fucking rules.
-[ speaks indistinctly ]
-you can elbow,
Knock a motherfucker
off his board.
♪
-On your marks.
-Oh, shit, this --
-Yeah, provost! Stack 'em up!
-Get set...
Go!
Get it!
[ all cheering ]
Roy: Take 'em out!
♪
Oh, ho, ho!
Fuck him up, provost!
Yes!
Fuck him up, provost!
Phelps:
And the winner is ben raybourn!
-Oh, bullshit!
-Yeah!
All right, guys,
ben raybourn, the winner!
That was insane!
That race was sick.
Yeah.
Oh.
That was --
he was hanging
on my shirt.
I saw that, dude!
He wouldn't let go
of my fucking god damn shirt.
Man: Should have gone shirtless.
Raybourn:
I'm not very aggressive,
And we were about to drop in,
And andy roy comes up,
and he's, like,
"elbow him, hit him, whatever!"
Right at the end,
I grabbed his shirt
And pulled myself
And slingshotted
right in front of him,
Like, just barely
before the tape.
Oh, shit,
they're announcing shit.
I'm gonna listen.
Phelps: All right.
Next challenge is one
of our favorite disciplines,
The barrel jump.
Oh, barrel jumps.
You want me to do this?
You got this.
Come on, guys, three barrels.
-Who's got it?
-Get it!
[ all groan ]
[ screams ]
♪
Phelps: The barrel jump.
Anybody can go.
The first person
that clears the most barrels,
They win 100 fucking points.
Four barrels it is now.
Get it!
♪ turning back
the tune of trust ♪
Phelps: Yo!
[ shouts indistinctly ]
Get it, ben!
♪ children jump the line
Blake carpenter.
♪ ferme
[ speaking indistinctly ]
♪ la bouche
This is thrills
and spills, everybody.
I've never barrel jumped.
Burnett: The barrel jump
is something from the '70s.
Like, get as much as speed
as you can,
Jump from board to board.
Get it! Oh!
This isn't a thing people do,
So it's like kind of
testing some skate skills
That these guys maybe
didn't know they had.
Get it!
-Oh, that's six barrels.
-Ben's nailing it.
Phelps: The slams should come
really good, now.
Get it! Put it down!
Put it down!
Oh! Oh!
Put it down!
Hit it!
♪
-Oh!
-You left one.
Oh!
[ all cheering ]
-Yeah!
-Whoo!
Grab a barrel!
A big fucking 10.
Bring 'em down,
bring 'em down!
You got it!
[ all groan ]
Get it, get it, get it!
-Oh!
-Whoo!
Oh!
[ crowd groans ]
Fuck!
-Are you gonna try it again?
-No.
Ben says he's out.
Elijah and spider.
Fucking get it!
Phelps: 10 fucking barrels.
Put it down, elijah!
Oh.
[ all cheering ]
Aw, that was it!
♪
It's fun.
Spider!
♪ kick the sky
-Yeah!
-Yeah!
-Oh!
-Who is this fucking guy?
♪ turning back
the tune of trust ♪
♪ as minds escape
and born new lust ♪
get that 100 points!
♪ as parents turn the tide
get it, elijah!
Make this!
♪ children jump in time
♪ ferme
[ all groan ]
♪ la bouche
Barrel of fun!
Spider, it's the last chance.
Let's make some fucking noise!
-Get it!
-Charge it!
[ all groan ]
[ applause ]
We're gonna give it
to both you guys,
50 points each.
That was a tie at 10 barrels.
-Yeah, straight up.
Look how big that is.
-Yeah.
-Hey.
Dude,
I thought you guys had it.
Every --
All right, billy marks
and toy machine got 100 points
For the board build-off.
And ben raybourn,
100 points for the race.
We got 100 points to collin,
And we got 100 points to elijah
For the barrel jump.
No, they get 50 each.
-50 each, excuse me.
-Split it.
And now, it's time
to go get the books!
Let the madness begin!
[ all cheering ]
♪
I think we'll do good.
I just want to see the book.
I want to see what's in there.
Fuck. I just want to skate.
Burnett: So, we're about
to hand out the books.
These books are filled
with challenges.
This is their companion
for "king of the road."
All right, all the team
managers, step up here.
The teams are then gonna go
city to city,
Trying to earn
as many points as they can.
At the end, the team
with the most points
Is crowned king of the road.
These are the booklets
that you shall live and die by.
May god be with you
on your highway to hell.
Thanks for coming, guys.
Get on there and get your shit,
get your...
[ cheers and applause ]
All right, here we go.
♪
Skin.
Man: Later, boys!
100 points.
Couldn't have done it
without dan lu.
Dan lu?
-Yo.
That's what's gonna win
this shit is fucking teamwork.
Burnett: The teams are gonna go
their separate ways,
And then halfway through,
They're gonna meet
back up again.
Everybody in?
Fucking let the games begin.
♪
I should have, like,
lifted it up so I could see.
I'm sure they did that.
-No. No. I don't think so.
Billy marks is a fucking
snake, dude.
He probably did.
Case:
He was hitting the board
Every time he was trying
to stomp it -- dead center.
I was, like, how --
how's he fucking doing that?
Let's open this bitch
and get it going.
♪
Right in my hands.
[ mumbles ]
Ooh!
[ booklet thuds ]
You fucking idiot.
-Why'd he do that?
-What the fuck?
-I don't know why he did that.
-You're fucked.
Where'd it go?
Jesus, dude.
[ indistinct chatter ]
where'd it go?
I tried to grab the book
and throw it on the wall,
And instead, I threw it
over the junkyard fence.
[ booklet thuds ]
God damn it, clint.
-You get it?
-Yeah.
Oh, my god.
♪
[ laughs ]
Somebody fucking open
this thing and take it.
Here we go, we're in there.
Man: Fucking do this.
Are you guys fired up?
We're on, like,
a big scavenger hunt.
It's like
a thrasher magazine thing.
-Open the book.
-Thrasher, king of the road.
Let's see what we got.
-Glossy.
-Phew.
That's a book, all right.
"each team has seven cities,
including seattle."
Seven?
Your second city will be
texted you by 11:00 p.M.
On Saturday the 29th.
-What are the challenges?
-We're looking.
We're looking.
-Is that what we're doing?
I thought we were supposed
to find out where we're going.
No, they text you,
you fucking dipshit.
Ledge game, front nose,
pretzel out, suciu grind.
Hang ten, front crooks.
That's fucked.
Do a trick where all four wheels
Hit the ceiling
without planting a foot.
Ooh.
That is so sick.
What is it?
Smyth:
Grind a rail with the same
stair count as your age.
-[ laughs ]
-fuck, dude.
Walker:
This is where things get weird.
Get your tit, nose, tongue,
or eyebrow pierced.
Wet your pants
in a crowded place.
[ laughter ]
Make out with a woman over 50.
Make out with a poodle.
Rip your shirt off
in a public place
And remain shirtless
for five days.
-Gnarly.
-Holy shit.
Get a thrasher tattoo
from one of your teammates.
-Whoa.
-Sick!
[ laughs ]
I'll get one.
Water out, water in.
Drink your own pee.
While in motion
And with
the entire team present,
Take a dump in the van.
-Oh!
-Nasty.
[ laughs ]
Someone's gotta take a shit
in the van, dude?
♪
Oh, fuck!
Butt chug a beer
or chocolate milk.
Oh, my fucking god, dude.
Holy shit.
That's easy.
You do that, and then you have
diarrhea in the van.
[ laughter ]
basically.
It's like 300 points.
Most ruthless king of the road
performance,
Most points by a team rider.
That's mvp.
And that's that.
Should we fire it up?
-Yeah, let's do it.
-Mm.
Hey, where we going first?
Shit. We got this, boys!
Walker:
Who's doing makeouts, dude?
I'll fucking do it
if I have to.
I'll take a shit in here.
I don't care.
Get in your fucking car.
[ black lips' "noc-a-homa"
plays ]
♪ lonely tipi
sitting in the sky ♪
♪ dancing circles
on a summer night ♪
-Yeah?
-Let's do that.
♪ children laughing
at his expense ♪
You want to bondo all the way up
to this shit, right?
First spot, here it is.
Perfect.
♪ he'll keep waving,
tomahawk in hand ♪
Sinclair:
We're fixing the spot up.
There's a pretty good
nine-stair rail,
So just trying
to make it skateable.
It's a little rough up there.
♪ I wish that other people
can see ♪
Lutheran:
I went on "king of the road"
twice prior to this.
The trip's so much different
than a normal skate trip
'cause your goals
are far from a typical,
Like, skate trick, you know?
♪ noc-a-homa
♪ ah, ah, ah
How much?
That much?
♪ just like you and me
man: Yeah.
♪ aaaaaah
Sinclair:
Water up, drink your own pee.
First trick of the fucking trip.
Dan lu -- 50 points.
-Yep.
Cheers, boys.
Get it, dan lu!
Oh, you don't got to drink
the whole thing, do you?
Oh, my god.
-Oh.
Sinclair: Uh-oh.
Dan lu drank piss already.
[ coughs ]
ohh.
Dan lu, right off the bat,
drank his own piss.
-How bad could it be?
-Just sucked it back.
[ skateboard clacks ]
Oh,
I'm gonna mark it, dan lu.
I'm marking it.
[ team spirit's "cool guy"
plays ]
I'm gonna try to get this one.
Man: Oh!
-Ohh.
Worst ground in the usa,
And we're trying
the fly ground challenges.
All right,
bill's got it right here.
♪ girl
♪ you make me feel unwell
-Whoo!
-There it is.
Yeah, bill.
-In the book, dude.
Yeah, there it is.
♪ to let you know
little mark, 20 points.
♪ I feel sad
♪ 'cause I want you so bad
That was it.
-That was a good one.
♪ I'm trying to convince you
♪ I want you to convince
fucking looks perfect.
Hey, dan,
did you get your birkenstocks?
Lutheran: Mm-hmm.
♪ I said I told you so
I'm gonna jump board in birkies.
♪ I said I know it's so
birkies!
♪ 'cause I'm trying
to convince myself ♪
♪ that you are worth
all of this hell ♪
Sinclair: Whoo!
Yeah, daniel.
[ laughing ] yeah.
-Fuck yeah, dan lu.
-Birkies.
-Yeah, bros!
Dan lu usually always
travels with birkenstocks.
Caveman -- the board slide,
first try.
Look at these fucking things.
♪ I'm waiting
for the right time ♪
This is not -- you can't --
you can't skate in those.
[ laughs ]
-I think stick to that.
-Yeah.
Billy's sticking to this,
And then blake's sticking
to this guy right here.
You got it, blake.
♪ girl
♪ I think I'm under your spell
That's fucking scary.
♪ 'cause I'm sweating
and shaking ♪
♪ oh, girl
Yeah!
♪ you make me feel so mad
holland: So far, so good, man.
Off the list right now -- that's
what you want to be doing.
♪ 'cause I want you so bad
what else we got?
We got, uh,
backside losi grind.
Mike: What's a losi grind?
180 --
It's a back lift,
but you land on the front truck.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, that's heavy.
Ohh!
I'm down.
Carpenter: Daniel lutheran
is our go-to rail man.
-Don't know how to do it.
-He's got a lot of rail game.
He's a long-haired,
hippie freak.
He's willing
to do whatever.
[ all groan ]
-[ whistles ]
-yes.
Marks:
It's the first rail we found,
So it's like,
try to get what you can.
I'm gonna wait till I find,
like, something pretty good.
Like, this is gonna --
man: Right here.
One slam, you just get
torn apart on the ground.
I mean,
this rail is pretty steep.
-Yeah!
-See?
Aah!
When you're trying something
you know you can do
And you just can't
pull it together,
You start getting pissed --
pissed at yourself
'cause you know you can do it.
-Oh!
-Fuck!
Lutheran:
Some people go hard.
Some people, like,
draw their lines.
You just have to play it by ear.
I'm not too scared
of much of it,
But it's like, you are put on
this trip to try and do stuff.
That creates an anxiety,
you know.
-Ohh!
-[ sighs ]
Phew.
[ sighs ]
[ sniffs ]
Sorry, brothers.
Billy is older brother
coach style.
Like, it came to a point
where he was, like,
This is the first spot
of the trip, too.
Like, "you might as well
just save a little juice."
It's, like, when the guy comes
to the pitcher at the mound.
He's like, "your arm's done."
[ laughter ]
your arm's done.
-Bring in the reliever.
-You got nothing left.
♪ so, here we go
for your stereo ♪
♪ and you can tell
that it's real ♪
♪ when you hear me go
hear me go skills ♪
-We're back.
-Gonna make some magic happen.
♪ skills
♪ now you feel it
when we drop those ♪
♪ hot beats stop foes,
killing it, we got those ♪
[ cheers and applause ]
♪ skills
♪ it's the music
that the street love ♪
Smyth: Where would you try
that layback, elijah?
-♪ skills
-layback smith.
Aw, shit.
♪ watch as we do it again
♪ you little suckers
know better ♪
♪ I go head up
♪ if your man
left a thing in the whip ♪
♪ then tell him go get it
yeah, eli!
♪ we hold it down
like a holy crown ♪
♪ fools acting like they
know me, throw me phony... ♪
-So, what is the next challenge?
-Miscellaneous challenges.
All four wheels on a ceiling
without planting a foot.
Just get it!
♪ but you missed the fact
♪ your chick's talking
this and that ♪
[ laughter ]
♪ I'mma make it simple, jack
♪ I doubled up
and tripled that ♪
♪ soldiers,
where your pistols at? ♪
Eldridge:
Raven's our vert dude,
And he's one of the best
in the world,
So whatever challenge
is on, like, ramps
Or half pipes or anything,
got that covered.
♪ catch a joyful rush
-Easy, dude.
-Let's go catch!
♪ homeboy, it's us, you know
the face from the club ♪
♪ blazing a dub with my peeps,
raising it up for these ♪
-♪ skills
-hey, rave!
♪ point blank, we vital,
spit flow, rip shows ♪
♪ peep the recital
I think he's got it.
♪ skills
♪ now
♪ you feel it
when we drop those ♪
♪ hot beats stop foes
all: Yeah!
♪ killing it, we got
those skills ♪
[ cheers and applause ]
♪ it's the music
that the street love ♪
♪ each thug is now reppin' this
with deep love ♪
-He got it.
-Yeah. Yeah.
Great.
-Fuck yeah.
-Check that off.
How super serious
are they about the four wheels?
'cause it was three wheels.
'cause it didn't look
like four.
It wasn't.
Smyth:
The four wheels is in question
Just 'cause I don't know
if all four were up there.
On mine, it's like
not at the same time.
Yeah.
Was it three wheels
on the ceiling?
Was there four?
I don't know.
Is -- is burnett here?
Mike?
We're going
to check with, uh, burn dog
If the trick is valid
To have confirmation
before we leave the spot.
What's up, burn dog?
I'm trying to send
the city challenges right now.
Yeah, I'm sen--
can I ask you one -- one thing?
-Yeah.
-One thing, really quick.
-Yeah.
-Can you put it down? Okay.
-No, no, no, don't.
-No, no, but I --
I don't do that.
I don't do that.
No, no, you have to understand.
Is this good enough?
Is this -- are you gonna ask me,
"is this good enough?"
yeah.
-No.
-It's not?
Or you can't tell us?
-Use your best judgment.
I can't do it.
'cause I can't do it for
everybody for every thing.
-Okay, all right.
-You know?
Yeah.
Thank you.
He won't let us know.
Burnett:
Each "king of the road" team
Has two videographers
in the van with them.
These guys are veterans
Who've made
countless skate videos.
See where that one
is not touching?
-Yeah.
-There's the shadow.
Burnett: And these guys
are crucial to each team.
The only way we can figure out
who won this thing
Is by looking
at the skate footage.
And if these guys don't
document it correctly...
-I mean, fuck.
-Let's do it.
...The team doesn't get
the points.
♪
♪ put the candles on the cake
♪ we're gonna celebrate
♪ we've got another year
-We're gonna go pick up cakes...
-Yeah.
...Just so we have ammo.
Hey, can we get one extra
for benny boy to eat?
♪ gonna celebrate
we're doing it.
♪ got another year
yes.
♪ and we're all here
Got so many.
♪ you got your
birthday get-up on ♪
[ speaks indistinctly ]
oh, the good,
dense ones.
Raspberry cake.
D way's dessert.
Hit an opponent with cake
from your vehicle.
Burnett: A lot
of these challenges are based
On memorable moments
in skateboarding history,
So a lot of the younger guys,
when they see it,
They're, like, "what is this?"
D way's dessert.
This is based on danny way
In the plan b
"questionable" video.
There's a throwaway shot
of him and colin
Riding around at night...
Shit's gonna go down.
...Throwing cake at complete
strangers from their car,
Just basically
being teenage assholes.
30 years later,
we resurrect that moment
Into this challenge.
You get 50 points.
Let's roll up and cake him.
Stevie's sitting right up there.
I can get him.
-Get him. Watch out.
-Get the camera ready.
-Camera ready.
-Camera ready.
-You got the camera ready?
Ah,
these fuckers are back.
-Dude.
-God damn it.
-Oh, god!
-Yeah.
-Oh, fuck!
-[ laughs ]
-Boom! Get in!
[ indistinct shouting ]
[ laughter ]
We got hit with a twinkie cake.
Caked his ass, got stevie.
-Check, baby!
-Check!
Hey, since we're done,
let me get a pound cake.
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
-I'll fucking cake it up.
-Have at 'em, dudes.
♪
Smyth:
Well, as soon as he gets this,
We're gonna be out.
♪ come on
♪ make a wish, make a wish
[ cheers and applause ]
♪ make a wish, make a wish
Fuck, yeah!
♪ make a wish, make a wish
The head counts
as an extra wheel.
Let's get outta here!
Hell of a first spot.
[ the barbazons'
"bad catholics" plays ]
[ vocalizing ]
Walker: Jaws, you gotta do
the butt chug again, man.
Raybourn:
That's the gnarliest drop in.
Tail drop right there.
-Is that a drop in?
-Tail drop in?
-Yeah, that's it.
-Ben's got it.
♪ I take confession
on a Saturday night ♪
All right,
let's go check this thing.
Let's go checky.
Go on this one.
That one's got, like, concrete.
Off the ledge
would be sick as fuck!
This one's fine.
There's a challenge
that is gnarliest drop in,
And we're just going for that,
But you don't know
that you win that
until it's over.
Burnett: Another way
the teams can earn points
Is through the highest,
longest, most.
Only one team
can earn the points for this,
And it's not judged
until the end.
Highest, longest, most
Is where you can really
rack up points
And push your team to the top.
Fucking first try, baby!
Bring it!
-Bang it out!
-Bring it!
-For the points!
-Bring it!
-Yoo!
Get it!
Oh!
Oh! Oh!
Oh!
-Yeah!
-Fuck, yeah, dude!
-Yes!
-Yes.
[ crossing signal dinging ]
dude,
you're a psycho.
-With the train coming.
-Oh, right on.
-Oh, with the train!
-Yes.
With the train.
You got it!
Come on, baby,
right here.
Hey.
The train.
[ grunts ]
[ train whistle blowing ]
Yeah!
[ cheers ]
-Ohh!
-Man.
You good?
You got it. Come on, baby.
Right here.
♪
-Right here.
-Sick, dude.
You got this. So easy.
Right now, baby.
Right here.
Bring it, dude!
Bring it!
Right here, ben, this is it!
[ claps hands ]
Right fucking here, baby!
-Ben, right here.
Right here.
Easy, baby!
-Yoo!
-Right here.
-Yes!
-Yeah!
[ cheers ]
Oh, my god!
Fuck yeah!
-Fuck yeah, dude!
-Yeah!
-God damn it.
-Get the fuck out of here!
[ indistinct chatter ]
That is so gnarly.
[ indistinct chatter ]
Raybourn: Yeah, that was
fucking scary, dude.
It was --
it was gnarly, for sure.
I'm still shaky.
Aw, sick.
Hell, yeah.
Mike's got a ton
of friends up here in seattle,
And, uh, he's got a friend
Who's gonna send us a pin
to a skate park.
They got,
like, quarter pipes, ledges,
Mannys, fucking stairs.
I think everything we need.
[ the mystery light's "what
happens when you turn the devil
down" plays ]
Get some shit quick.
[ engine starts ]
This dude is tight.
He's got no seat,
and he's drinking a 40.
♪ I had a drink with the devil
What's your name?
My name's louie dawgs.
Louie dawgs.
Dude, clint, good to meet you.
♪
♪ could be the one he said
♪ what happens when you turn
the devil down? ♪
-Whoo!
-Yeah, he got it.
-Yeah, baby!
-Hell, yeah.
-Unh!
-Thanks, brother. Hell, yeah.
He's a homie.
Yeah.
♪
♪
It's louie dawgs.
-Louie dawgs?
-Mm-hmm.
This, uh --
this park's the shit.
It's got, like, all the best
things in the park
Crammed into one
tiny, little morsel.
I love this park.
It's not too big.
It's not like, um,
the dude that built it
Was, like, trying to be
the gnarliest dude
That ever built
the gnarliest park.
"it's gonna kill ya" park.
It's perfect.
♪
Fuck yeah, dude.
You did it?
Yeah.
Case:
It's first day, couple hours in.
We're getting adjusted
to the process.
John!
Headstand.
Man: Get it, baby.
-Oh!
-Oh, shit! Sorry.
♪
Land that shit.
-Oh!
-Yeah.
Walker: A lot of the tricks
are, like, catered
To, like,
certain dudes on the teams.
You know, like,
there'll be, like, one trick
That one guy on the team
has done, you know,
So they'll throw it in there.
And then sometimes, you know,
there's tricks
That, like, just, nobody's done.
♪
Oh, my god.
Rooney:
He has to do a backside 5050,
And then he's got
to lay down into a coffin,
And then roll in on his back
Like a coffin
down the transition.
Do you go like this
or like this?
Probably like that.
I've never seen it done.
It's definitely a difficult,
weird trick, you know?
It's a "king of the road" trick,
for sure.
Fuck!
[ skateboard clatters ]
Man, it hurts so bad,
every time.
-Yeah.
-It's really hard.
And I thought it was just
Gonna be funny and easy,
but it's hard.
My back hurts now.
[ happy diving's "so bunted"
plays ]
[ cheers ]
Rooney: I think we're gonna mark
that one in the book,
And I think it'll work.
It's king of the road, you know?
Like, everything
can't be textbook.
He's starting
to fuck up his back,
So he's already done.
It's sort of a team contest --
a brand contest in a way.
Like you're up against them,
but every one of these guys
Is, like, competitive
with themselves.
♪ they call my name
-Oh!
-Yes.
Man: Oh! Oh!
♪
♪ and when I've lost my way
[ all groan ]
♪ just waiting
for a better day ♪
right here, mike.
♪ to come around and say
you're doing fine ♪
[ cheers ]
-Oh, my god!
-I earned it.
-Oh, my god.
-Fuck yeah.
♪
Wow.
-That was gnarly.
-Thank you.
Case: I never really felt
like people thought
We were gonna win
the first year,
And then the second year,
people kind of came around,
Like, "holy shit,
they did really good."
And then for this one now,
it's like,
I'm actually, like,
hearing people
Thinking like
we're gonna threepeat.
Shit,
I always go into it thinking
We're the underdogs every year.
We're up against chocolate.
I'm, like, "damn, they could --
They could take it.
"parking reserved
for pastor and wife only."
That's us.
[ laughs ]
Smyth: Scarfing material.
Eat a page out of the book.
Oh, let's eat that one
with no ink on the back.
Yeah, less ink.
Better, huh?
Yeah.
Man:
Are you gonna eat that?
I mean, fuck,
someone's gotta do it, right?
I might as well eat
a piece of paper.
[ laughs ]
♪
Tastes like chicken,
you know?
-Tastes like chicken?
-Yeah.
What kind of fucking chicken
you eating?
[ laughs ]
♪ neon lights can look
like rainbows ♪
Yo, ra,
let me get a big bite, dude.
♪ to a young man strong
for the dreams ♪
I'll try to swallow this
right here.
♪ but the colors soon fade
into tear drops ♪
♪ if you miss your chance
on a train bound for glory ♪
Yeah.
Whoo!
♪ I been chasing dreams
since I was 20 ♪
♪ same faded love 1,000 times
♪ I traveled all across
this country ♪
It's -- making progress.
♪ looking for my place
on a train bound for glory ♪
[ cheers ]
♪ waiting on a train
bound for glory ♪
It's so thick.
Feel this fucking paper.
Man: I mean, dude,
blend it in a smoothie.
Use it as a piece of cheese
on a burger.
Whatever I'd be doing,
I'd be doing it with food, dude.
Like, just chewing paper
is so gnarly.
♪ tryin' to catch a train
bound for glory ♪
On the next
"king of the road"...
I'mma just do it, you know,
just try to get points.
-Let's go!
-Fucking do it.
1, 2, 3, 4!
3, 4!
-Whoa!
-Oh!
-[ screams ]
-[ laughs ]
Oh, my!
♪
Oh, yeah,
she's gonna be bummed.
Yeah, daddy.
All right, well, who's up?
-Oh!
-Oh!
-Oh! [ laughs ]
-check!
Roy: [ laughs ]
Yeah.
---
Please do not attempt to perform
any of these stunts
Or activities in this show.
They are super-dangerous --
crazy, wild dangerous.
The stunts seen are either
performed by professionals
Or under the supervision
of professionals.
Serious professionals.
This show
also contains bad language.
Come on, baby, hold on!
Hold on, baby!
♪
-Dude, this is insane.
-Aah!
We gonna go in the helicopter?
Hell, yeah!
Get in, baby!
-Get in, baby!
-Yeah, man.
[ indistinct chatter ]
I love the smell of napalm
in the morning!
You got this!
-[ laughs ]
-[ laughs ]
-Yeah!
-Holy shit.
[ indistinct chatter ]
Yeah!
♪
[ black lips' "raw meat" plays ]
Whoo!
♪ raw oysters, texas pete
♪ sea urchin on the reef
2015 king of the fucking road!
Thrasher magazine's
skateboarding scavenger hunt.
♪ lick butter goes with keef
Are you guys
ready to fucking battle?
♪ into the cocoa leaf
yeah!
Three teams of top skaters
battling it out
To accomplish
amazing stunts and challenges.
Whoo!
This year, we have chocolate...
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
...Toy machine,
And the defending champs,
birdhouse.
[ grunts ]
♪ oh, baby
Fuck yeah!
♪
They go from city to city
for 13 days,
Documenting every crazy trick
To bone-crushing slams.
♪ sweet bread's
my favorite treat ♪
-Ohh.
-Ohh.
-Oh!
-Ohh!
It's just like the scavenger
hunt of all times.
Hey, do a trick barefoot.
Making some mayhem
out in the streets.
♪ fresh onions on my leaf
-aah!
-Whoo-hoo!
♪ horseradish with horse meat
♪ sea urchin,
ocean skeet to you ♪
"wet your pants
in a crowded place."
-I got that.
-[ laughs ]
You guys need
to fucking step up!
Hey, hey!
I'm getting a little
fucking sick of --
I'm sorry for hitting --
[ laughs ]
♪
♪ oh, baby
[ cheers and applause ]
when the dust settles,
The team who's done
the gnarliest stunts
Is gonna be crowned
king of the road.
[ liquid trickles ]
[ skateboard approaching ]
[ birds chirping ]
Jake!
Phelper!
♪
Let's do a practice inside.
We just gotta
figure it out.
Burnett: King of the road
starts tomorrow,
So we're here in seattle.
And we're gonna go check out
marginal way,
The famous skate park
under the bridge
Where the teams
are gonna meet up.
And we're gonna get jake phelps
and andy roy down there
'cause they're gonna help mc
this thing.
[ andy cackles ]
Jake phelps is the longtime
editor at "thrasher" magazine.
He's a walking encyclopedia
of skateboarding knowledge.
He's got a photographic memory.
He calls it like he sees it.
He's a loose cannon.
None of your god damn business,
fucker.
[ laughter ]
He loves skateboarding,
And he's kind of
like the strong man of thrasher.
I don't care.
I was fucking with you. Come on.
And then we got andy roy.
[ whistling ]
Boo! Aah!
Burnett: We've never
had andy host before.
Here we go.
He's been on "king of the road"
before with antihero.
King of the road.
Burnett:
He is just an original gnarler.
-All right!
-And he's a hype man.
There's nobody
more hype than andy.
Roy: Whoo!
Big, jordy!
It don't get no better
than that. Man!
We're gonna kick this thing off
With a few challenges
and do a dry run.
I got a little script
we can practice.
Okay.
The points you want to hit.
"welcome to king of the road.
We got 3 teams,
13 days,
We're gonna go city to city,
And you gotta bust
the best tricks.
You gotta film this shit."
50 grand?
No one told me.
Yeah, and you will be
king of the road.
And bragging rights
for next year.
Yeah.
We'll just practice.
So, I'm --
♪ hey, oh
You gotta go
where we tell you,
And then we'll see you
in san diego.
All right.
No. No.
Don't -- don't say any cities.
They don't know
where they're going.
All right.
Burnett: There's a little bit
of cat herding with these guys.
The front side, back side.
You get better moments
When it's, like,
not so planned out.
We'll see what happens.
♪
Vitetta: We are in seattle,
Skate park meeting point,
all the teams.
We're gonna start
the competition.
[ speaking indistinctly ]
♪
Burnett: This is the 11th year
we've done king of the road.
This year, the teams
are toy machine, chocolate,
And the defending champions,
birdhouse.
It's gonna be
a really good showdown.
Fisheye on, fisheye off.
It's "king of the road."
All right, let's do this.
Man:
Your turn right here, all right?
Burnett:
Chocolate, they're kind of
like a legacy team.
It really is a family,
And it's really hard
to get on the team.
Raven tershy,
He's like one of the best
bowl skaters in the world.
Powerful on the board,
kind of a showman,
But then he can also put it down
in a backyard pool.
He can street skate, too,
which makes him a triple threat.
Tershy: Just gotta stay healthy
and stay motivated
'cause you get sore real fast.
Got a good night's sleep
last night
[claps hands] ready to go.
Perez: I been here one time
when they were just building it.
Fucking gnarly.
Burnett:
And then we've got stevie perez.
Goes by the nickname "flacco."
He's like a classic l.A.
Street skater.
Always ripping...
-Oh!
-Oh!
...Unless he's sleeping.
-Yeah!
Burnett: He can be goofy,
but he's also passionate.
Aah.
I just want to be on trips
with the homies.
[ cheers ]
Everyone is getting gnarly,
you know.
Everyone's just, "go for it."
[ laughs ]
[ shouts indistinctly ]
Burnett:
And then we have elijah berle,
Who's known for being
able to shred everything.
Bowls, concrete, terrain,
a handrail chomper.
I think they're definitely
gonna be looking to him...
[ cheers ]
...To knock out a lot
of the tricks.
He's got the fucking spirit.
There's a really good chance
He'd be one of the mvps,
for sure.
Berle: You pretty much
just skate all day
And all night
for the next two weeks.
That was it.
It's not for everybody.
How you doing?
Chocolate's got a new guy
this year, johnny jones.
He's a scrappy ripper
from south central los angeles.
Jones:
I haven't traveled too much
outside of l.A.
Actually, I used to always watch
"king of the road,"
And it's a dream
come true for me.
Burnett: He's like a flow rider
for chocolate,
Which means he's not
on the team yet.
"king of the road"
is gonna be a big test for him.
Justin eldridge.
Even though he's not that old,
He's kind of the veteran
of the team.
Manuals, technical ledge stunts.
He's been on "king of the road"
a few times.
He's got tricks,
And he's gonna be
getting these guys hyped.
[ cheers and applause ]
Just try to keep it positive.
We have the sickest lineup.
Everybody has their strengths,
and [exhales forcefully]
This one's gonna be fun.
Burnett:
They're gonna be hard to beat.
-Whoo!
-Whoo!
[ froth's "lost my mind" plays ]
And then we've got toy machine.
-Right on.
-Marginal way skatepark.
I think we get the, uh,
king of the road handbook.
Guess we're about
to find out.
Billy's already pissed.
Burnett: Toy machine
is ed templeton's company.
These guys like to have fun,
And they like to get deadly
on the streets.
♪
Billy marks is the veteran
of this lineup.
The trick machine,
and he's also super funny.
Marks: Whatever I can do
to get everyone hyped,
I'm gonna do it.
I don't want to wipe shit
on my leg,
But I mean, if I have to,
I might have to just do it
to get the points.
We're in seattle.
Burnett: Daniel lutheran,
mr. Sunshine,
Has grinded
some of the biggest rails
In the history of skateboarding.
Lutheran: Being on toy machine,
it's the best.
Just a weird family.
I love it.
It means the most to me
to have a home like that.
Our crew's so solid,
it's anybody's game.
Burnett:
Collin provost, "the spider,"
He's one of the baddest dudes.
A lot of good times
and a lot of torture.
Burnett: He's a lanky master
of all terrain.
And the dude can bounce higher
than almost anybody.
Toy machine's bringing along
euro flow sensation
Axel cruysberghs.
He's from belgium.
I don't even know
if the whole team
Has met axel at this point,
So it's gonna be interesting
to see how he can hang.
I'm not sure what's in the book
and stuff,
What we have to do,
so we'll see.
I feel like,
since I'm the flow guy,
They're gonna give me
all the stupid shit to do.
Axel, I don't even
know who that is.
Like, I've seen him once.
I don't know what he can do.
We're here in the bowl.
Lastly, we got blake carpenter.
His switch game is insane.
The dude can ollie the house.
He's actually one
of the best amateurs
In skateboarding right now.
Carpenter:
Birdhouse is, like,
Really gnarly
with this competition.
They're warriors,
but we're gonna try to do
What we can
to take 'em down, I guess.
-Yeah, I know.
-Yeah, I know. This is tight.
Man: A lot of pressure, guys.
A lot of pressure.
Burnett: Last but not least,
we've got birdhouse.
They are the defending champs,
presently going for a threepeat.
-Ready, jerome?
-Let's have some fun.
Birdhouse is tony hawk's
company.
He's sending a battalion
of underdog shredders.
First,
you got aaron "jaws" homoki.
Man: Yeah!
This guy is a freak of nature.
Homoki:
I like to jump down big things.
That's my specialty
in this game. [ laughs ]
-Let's do this!
-It means a lot of pain.
-Oh!
-He's taken the biggest drops
In the history of skateboarding
and lived to tell.
Then you got clive dixon --
Everybody's good buddy.
The dude can jump
on some big rails,
And he's ready
to back his teammates up,
No matter what.
I'm down for whatever.
Last year,
I didn't shit in a toilet
Or use a toilet at all
for 12 days.
Like, I don't know,
anything that needs to be done.
Oh, this is a sick spot.
Burnett: Ben raybourn, he looks
like your paperboy from 1955.
He can do every transition trick
that has ever been invented.
He's one of the best
in the world
At that kind of skating.
Next up,
they got "silent" mike davis.
He's a technical wizard.
Davis:
All the guys are so rad.
They're all like
my best friends.
I want to do good.
I wouldn't want to be on a team
With other guys
that, like, don't really care.
Burnett: And then you got
The unofficial captain
of birdhouse, clint walker.
He's a good guy,
an awesome skater,
But he's got a hell of a temper.
He smashed people's windshield
out with a rock last year.
Nobody wants to win
"king of the road"
as bad as him.
I've always been
pretty competitive,
And, uh, I don't know.
I don't really
like to lose at anything,
Really, so I'll do whatever.
Burnett:
Toy machine and chocolate,
they've got the talent.
It's gonna be really hard
to beat birdhouse.
Walker:
Not many predictions.
Uh, definitely, it'll be crazy.
Hopefully, it's equally as crazy
as every other year
'cause that's what's fun
about it, I think.
Burnett: Marginal way,
this thing's lumpy.
It's not perfect.
It's not some x games course,
everything measured out.
This is gonna be sick.
Raybourn: We've been on two
"king of the roads" before this,
And usually, they only have
a halfway meet-up point
And then a meet-up point
at the end.
Has that ever happened?
-What?
-Beginning meet-up?
-Never.
Never happened in all of
"king of the road,"
So it's really crazy
going into this first thing
And having the, like,
"oh, fuck you," going already.
It's playful,
and we're friends in the end,
But for now, it's "fuck you."
[ train whistle blows ]
♪
Phelps: Is it on?
Can you guys hear this?
[ cheers ]
all right, guys!
Welcome to thrasher magazine's
2015 king of the fucking road!
[ cheers and applause ]
Are you ready to rock?
Yes!
-Whoo!
The three teams selected are...
The toy machine.
The chocolate mafia,
And the defending champion,
birdhouse!
These three teams
are gonna go rambo
Towards the finish line
And make the most ultimate
skateboard road trip.
[ cheers and applause ]
The first things
you're gonna do today...
Oh.
Sorry.
-What do they get?!
-Oh, what do you get?
Burnett:
What do they get?!
[ laughter ]
okay, at the end of the rainbow,
You get the trophy,
the cheddar,
50 grand,
And the cover
of thrasher magazine.
[ cheers ]
Ladies and gents,
here's andy roy.
Take it to another level,
andy.
All right, all right!
Who's got the meanest 360 flip?
I need one dude from each team.
-That's you, john.
Who's got the best
360 flip?
Step it up right now.
Phelps: One of you guys.
Who's got the money?
-Billy, toy machine!
-Billy marks!
-Elijah, chocolate!
-Elijah berle!
Birdhouse! Mike?
All right, we got this.
All right.
-Holy shit!
-Wow.
-Whoever...
-Pay attention, fuckers!
...Can put the board together
the fastest...
Everybody.
...And do a 360 flip
And snap the fucking board
in half --
I want two pieces!
And you guys
are gonna be blindfolded!
Fuck, yeah!
♪
Go, go, go!
Billy!
Get it!
Get it, get it, get it!
Phelps: Come on, mike!
Roy: Trick or treat.
Get done,
get done, get done!
Man: By your left knee,
by your left knee!
Grab that pack.
Come on, man!
You've been doing this
your whole fucking life!
-You should give up!
-[ laughs ]
Build it!
You guys better hurry!
There's two wheels
right below you.
Seriously,
too much weed, bro.
-Ah.
-He's got four right here.
-Billy's handling it right now.
-Second truck.
[ indistinct chatter ]
-Yeah, billy!
-Whoa!
And billy's the first one
to set the board up.
Here we go!
This is what
you get paid to do!
♪
Mike's almost there!
Elijah's still in last!
Yeah!
Yeah! Yeah!
Yeah!
Snap that motherfucker!
Snap it!
Sinclair:
I can't break it.
Go!
-Fuck.
-Holy shit!
-You picked the wrong board!
-Are you kidding me?
Come on, billy.
It's right there.
Head butt it!
Head butt it!
Elijah can't break
the board!
Head butt!
Head butt!
Your girlfriend cheated
on you!
Fucking get pissed!
What have you got?
What have you got?
What's in store?
Come on, mike!
Come on, mike!
Get it!
Yeah!
Yeah! Yeah!
Yeah!
Roy: Get it!
-We have a winner!
-Two pieces!
The winner!
-With 100 points, toy machine!
-That looks so god damned hard.
-That was fucking hard.
Aah!
-Yes!
-Whoo-hoo-hoo!
Billy killed it.
Phelps: All right, guys.
Rock 'em, sock 'em,
and roll 'em!
I want each team
to pick one rider
For a death-defying
skateboard race.
Toy machine.
-Provost!
-Spider!
Ray ray and raybourn.
All you guys come up here.
-Let's mad max 'em.
-Spider, come over here.
You guys, first rule of this is,
there's no fucking rules.
-[ speaks indistinctly ]
-you can elbow,
Knock a motherfucker
off his board.
♪
-On your marks.
-Oh, shit, this --
-Yeah, provost! Stack 'em up!
-Get set...
Go!
Get it!
[ all cheering ]
Roy: Take 'em out!
♪
Oh, ho, ho!
Fuck him up, provost!
Yes!
Fuck him up, provost!
Phelps:
And the winner is ben raybourn!
-Oh, bullshit!
-Yeah!
All right, guys,
ben raybourn, the winner!
That was insane!
That race was sick.
Yeah.
Oh.
That was --
he was hanging
on my shirt.
I saw that, dude!
He wouldn't let go
of my fucking god damn shirt.
Man: Should have gone shirtless.
Raybourn:
I'm not very aggressive,
And we were about to drop in,
And andy roy comes up,
and he's, like,
"elbow him, hit him, whatever!"
Right at the end,
I grabbed his shirt
And pulled myself
And slingshotted
right in front of him,
Like, just barely
before the tape.
Oh, shit,
they're announcing shit.
I'm gonna listen.
Phelps: All right.
Next challenge is one
of our favorite disciplines,
The barrel jump.
Oh, barrel jumps.
You want me to do this?
You got this.
Come on, guys, three barrels.
-Who's got it?
-Get it!
[ all groan ]
[ screams ]
♪
Phelps: The barrel jump.
Anybody can go.
The first person
that clears the most barrels,
They win 100 fucking points.
Four barrels it is now.
Get it!
♪ turning back
the tune of trust ♪
Phelps: Yo!
[ shouts indistinctly ]
Get it, ben!
♪ children jump the line
Blake carpenter.
♪ ferme
[ speaking indistinctly ]
♪ la bouche
This is thrills
and spills, everybody.
I've never barrel jumped.
Burnett: The barrel jump
is something from the '70s.
Like, get as much as speed
as you can,
Jump from board to board.
Get it! Oh!
This isn't a thing people do,
So it's like kind of
testing some skate skills
That these guys maybe
didn't know they had.
Get it!
-Oh, that's six barrels.
-Ben's nailing it.
Phelps: The slams should come
really good, now.
Get it! Put it down!
Put it down!
Oh! Oh!
Put it down!
Hit it!
♪
-Oh!
-You left one.
Oh!
[ all cheering ]
-Yeah!
-Whoo!
Grab a barrel!
A big fucking 10.
Bring 'em down,
bring 'em down!
You got it!
[ all groan ]
Get it, get it, get it!
-Oh!
-Whoo!
Oh!
[ crowd groans ]
Fuck!
-Are you gonna try it again?
-No.
Ben says he's out.
Elijah and spider.
Fucking get it!
Phelps: 10 fucking barrels.
Put it down, elijah!
Oh.
[ all cheering ]
Aw, that was it!
♪
It's fun.
Spider!
♪ kick the sky
-Yeah!
-Yeah!
-Oh!
-Who is this fucking guy?
♪ turning back
the tune of trust ♪
♪ as minds escape
and born new lust ♪
get that 100 points!
♪ as parents turn the tide
get it, elijah!
Make this!
♪ children jump in time
♪ ferme
[ all groan ]
♪ la bouche
Barrel of fun!
Spider, it's the last chance.
Let's make some fucking noise!
-Get it!
-Charge it!
[ all groan ]
[ applause ]
We're gonna give it
to both you guys,
50 points each.
That was a tie at 10 barrels.
-Yeah, straight up.
Look how big that is.
-Yeah.
-Hey.
Dude,
I thought you guys had it.
Every --
All right, billy marks
and toy machine got 100 points
For the board build-off.
And ben raybourn,
100 points for the race.
We got 100 points to collin,
And we got 100 points to elijah
For the barrel jump.
No, they get 50 each.
-50 each, excuse me.
-Split it.
And now, it's time
to go get the books!
Let the madness begin!
[ all cheering ]
♪
I think we'll do good.
I just want to see the book.
I want to see what's in there.
Fuck. I just want to skate.
Burnett: So, we're about
to hand out the books.
These books are filled
with challenges.
This is their companion
for "king of the road."
All right, all the team
managers, step up here.
The teams are then gonna go
city to city,
Trying to earn
as many points as they can.
At the end, the team
with the most points
Is crowned king of the road.
These are the booklets
that you shall live and die by.
May god be with you
on your highway to hell.
Thanks for coming, guys.
Get on there and get your shit,
get your...
[ cheers and applause ]
All right, here we go.
♪
Skin.
Man: Later, boys!
100 points.
Couldn't have done it
without dan lu.
Dan lu?
-Yo.
That's what's gonna win
this shit is fucking teamwork.
Burnett: The teams are gonna go
their separate ways,
And then halfway through,
They're gonna meet
back up again.
Everybody in?
Fucking let the games begin.
♪
I should have, like,
lifted it up so I could see.
I'm sure they did that.
-No. No. I don't think so.
Billy marks is a fucking
snake, dude.
He probably did.
Case:
He was hitting the board
Every time he was trying
to stomp it -- dead center.
I was, like, how --
how's he fucking doing that?
Let's open this bitch
and get it going.
♪
Right in my hands.
[ mumbles ]
Ooh!
[ booklet thuds ]
You fucking idiot.
-Why'd he do that?
-What the fuck?
-I don't know why he did that.
-You're fucked.
Where'd it go?
Jesus, dude.
[ indistinct chatter ]
where'd it go?
I tried to grab the book
and throw it on the wall,
And instead, I threw it
over the junkyard fence.
[ booklet thuds ]
God damn it, clint.
-You get it?
-Yeah.
Oh, my god.
♪
[ laughs ]
Somebody fucking open
this thing and take it.
Here we go, we're in there.
Man: Fucking do this.
Are you guys fired up?
We're on, like,
a big scavenger hunt.
It's like
a thrasher magazine thing.
-Open the book.
-Thrasher, king of the road.
Let's see what we got.
-Glossy.
-Phew.
That's a book, all right.
"each team has seven cities,
including seattle."
Seven?
Your second city will be
texted you by 11:00 p.M.
On Saturday the 29th.
-What are the challenges?
-We're looking.
We're looking.
-Is that what we're doing?
I thought we were supposed
to find out where we're going.
No, they text you,
you fucking dipshit.
Ledge game, front nose,
pretzel out, suciu grind.
Hang ten, front crooks.
That's fucked.
Do a trick where all four wheels
Hit the ceiling
without planting a foot.
Ooh.
That is so sick.
What is it?
Smyth:
Grind a rail with the same
stair count as your age.
-[ laughs ]
-fuck, dude.
Walker:
This is where things get weird.
Get your tit, nose, tongue,
or eyebrow pierced.
Wet your pants
in a crowded place.
[ laughter ]
Make out with a woman over 50.
Make out with a poodle.
Rip your shirt off
in a public place
And remain shirtless
for five days.
-Gnarly.
-Holy shit.
Get a thrasher tattoo
from one of your teammates.
-Whoa.
-Sick!
[ laughs ]
I'll get one.
Water out, water in.
Drink your own pee.
While in motion
And with
the entire team present,
Take a dump in the van.
-Oh!
-Nasty.
[ laughs ]
Someone's gotta take a shit
in the van, dude?
♪
Oh, fuck!
Butt chug a beer
or chocolate milk.
Oh, my fucking god, dude.
Holy shit.
That's easy.
You do that, and then you have
diarrhea in the van.
[ laughter ]
basically.
It's like 300 points.
Most ruthless king of the road
performance,
Most points by a team rider.
That's mvp.
And that's that.
Should we fire it up?
-Yeah, let's do it.
-Mm.
Hey, where we going first?
Shit. We got this, boys!
Walker:
Who's doing makeouts, dude?
I'll fucking do it
if I have to.
I'll take a shit in here.
I don't care.
Get in your fucking car.
[ black lips' "noc-a-homa"
plays ]
♪ lonely tipi
sitting in the sky ♪
♪ dancing circles
on a summer night ♪
-Yeah?
-Let's do that.
♪ children laughing
at his expense ♪
You want to bondo all the way up
to this shit, right?
First spot, here it is.
Perfect.
♪ he'll keep waving,
tomahawk in hand ♪
Sinclair:
We're fixing the spot up.
There's a pretty good
nine-stair rail,
So just trying
to make it skateable.
It's a little rough up there.
♪ I wish that other people
can see ♪
Lutheran:
I went on "king of the road"
twice prior to this.
The trip's so much different
than a normal skate trip
'cause your goals
are far from a typical,
Like, skate trick, you know?
♪ noc-a-homa
♪ ah, ah, ah
How much?
That much?
♪ just like you and me
man: Yeah.
♪ aaaaaah
Sinclair:
Water up, drink your own pee.
First trick of the fucking trip.
Dan lu -- 50 points.
-Yep.
Cheers, boys.
Get it, dan lu!
Oh, you don't got to drink
the whole thing, do you?
Oh, my god.
-Oh.
Sinclair: Uh-oh.
Dan lu drank piss already.
[ coughs ]
ohh.
Dan lu, right off the bat,
drank his own piss.
-How bad could it be?
-Just sucked it back.
[ skateboard clacks ]
Oh,
I'm gonna mark it, dan lu.
I'm marking it.
[ team spirit's "cool guy"
plays ]
I'm gonna try to get this one.
Man: Oh!
-Ohh.
Worst ground in the usa,
And we're trying
the fly ground challenges.
All right,
bill's got it right here.
♪ girl
♪ you make me feel unwell
-Whoo!
-There it is.
Yeah, bill.
-In the book, dude.
Yeah, there it is.
♪ to let you know
little mark, 20 points.
♪ I feel sad
♪ 'cause I want you so bad
That was it.
-That was a good one.
♪ I'm trying to convince you
♪ I want you to convince
fucking looks perfect.
Hey, dan,
did you get your birkenstocks?
Lutheran: Mm-hmm.
♪ I said I told you so
I'm gonna jump board in birkies.
♪ I said I know it's so
birkies!
♪ 'cause I'm trying
to convince myself ♪
♪ that you are worth
all of this hell ♪
Sinclair: Whoo!
Yeah, daniel.
[ laughing ] yeah.
-Fuck yeah, dan lu.
-Birkies.
-Yeah, bros!
Dan lu usually always
travels with birkenstocks.
Caveman -- the board slide,
first try.
Look at these fucking things.
♪ I'm waiting
for the right time ♪
This is not -- you can't --
you can't skate in those.
[ laughs ]
-I think stick to that.
-Yeah.
Billy's sticking to this,
And then blake's sticking
to this guy right here.
You got it, blake.
♪ girl
♪ I think I'm under your spell
That's fucking scary.
♪ 'cause I'm sweating
and shaking ♪
♪ oh, girl
Yeah!
♪ you make me feel so mad
holland: So far, so good, man.
Off the list right now -- that's
what you want to be doing.
♪ 'cause I want you so bad
what else we got?
We got, uh,
backside losi grind.
Mike: What's a losi grind?
180 --
It's a back lift,
but you land on the front truck.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, that's heavy.
Ohh!
I'm down.
Carpenter: Daniel lutheran
is our go-to rail man.
-Don't know how to do it.
-He's got a lot of rail game.
He's a long-haired,
hippie freak.
He's willing
to do whatever.
[ all groan ]
-[ whistles ]
-yes.
Marks:
It's the first rail we found,
So it's like,
try to get what you can.
I'm gonna wait till I find,
like, something pretty good.
Like, this is gonna --
man: Right here.
One slam, you just get
torn apart on the ground.
I mean,
this rail is pretty steep.
-Yeah!
-See?
Aah!
When you're trying something
you know you can do
And you just can't
pull it together,
You start getting pissed --
pissed at yourself
'cause you know you can do it.
-Oh!
-Fuck!
Lutheran:
Some people go hard.
Some people, like,
draw their lines.
You just have to play it by ear.
I'm not too scared
of much of it,
But it's like, you are put on
this trip to try and do stuff.
That creates an anxiety,
you know.
-Ohh!
-[ sighs ]
Phew.
[ sighs ]
[ sniffs ]
Sorry, brothers.
Billy is older brother
coach style.
Like, it came to a point
where he was, like,
This is the first spot
of the trip, too.
Like, "you might as well
just save a little juice."
It's, like, when the guy comes
to the pitcher at the mound.
He's like, "your arm's done."
[ laughter ]
your arm's done.
-Bring in the reliever.
-You got nothing left.
♪ so, here we go
for your stereo ♪
♪ and you can tell
that it's real ♪
♪ when you hear me go
hear me go skills ♪
-We're back.
-Gonna make some magic happen.
♪ skills
♪ now you feel it
when we drop those ♪
♪ hot beats stop foes,
killing it, we got those ♪
[ cheers and applause ]
♪ skills
♪ it's the music
that the street love ♪
Smyth: Where would you try
that layback, elijah?
-♪ skills
-layback smith.
Aw, shit.
♪ watch as we do it again
♪ you little suckers
know better ♪
♪ I go head up
♪ if your man
left a thing in the whip ♪
♪ then tell him go get it
yeah, eli!
♪ we hold it down
like a holy crown ♪
♪ fools acting like they
know me, throw me phony... ♪
-So, what is the next challenge?
-Miscellaneous challenges.
All four wheels on a ceiling
without planting a foot.
Just get it!
♪ but you missed the fact
♪ your chick's talking
this and that ♪
[ laughter ]
♪ I'mma make it simple, jack
♪ I doubled up
and tripled that ♪
♪ soldiers,
where your pistols at? ♪
Eldridge:
Raven's our vert dude,
And he's one of the best
in the world,
So whatever challenge
is on, like, ramps
Or half pipes or anything,
got that covered.
♪ catch a joyful rush
-Easy, dude.
-Let's go catch!
♪ homeboy, it's us, you know
the face from the club ♪
♪ blazing a dub with my peeps,
raising it up for these ♪
-♪ skills
-hey, rave!
♪ point blank, we vital,
spit flow, rip shows ♪
♪ peep the recital
I think he's got it.
♪ skills
♪ now
♪ you feel it
when we drop those ♪
♪ hot beats stop foes
all: Yeah!
♪ killing it, we got
those skills ♪
[ cheers and applause ]
♪ it's the music
that the street love ♪
♪ each thug is now reppin' this
with deep love ♪
-He got it.
-Yeah. Yeah.
Great.
-Fuck yeah.
-Check that off.
How super serious
are they about the four wheels?
'cause it was three wheels.
'cause it didn't look
like four.
It wasn't.
Smyth:
The four wheels is in question
Just 'cause I don't know
if all four were up there.
On mine, it's like
not at the same time.
Yeah.
Was it three wheels
on the ceiling?
Was there four?
I don't know.
Is -- is burnett here?
Mike?
We're going
to check with, uh, burn dog
If the trick is valid
To have confirmation
before we leave the spot.
What's up, burn dog?
I'm trying to send
the city challenges right now.
Yeah, I'm sen--
can I ask you one -- one thing?
-Yeah.
-One thing, really quick.
-Yeah.
-Can you put it down? Okay.
-No, no, no, don't.
-No, no, but I --
I don't do that.
I don't do that.
No, no, you have to understand.
Is this good enough?
Is this -- are you gonna ask me,
"is this good enough?"
yeah.
-No.
-It's not?
Or you can't tell us?
-Use your best judgment.
I can't do it.
'cause I can't do it for
everybody for every thing.
-Okay, all right.
-You know?
Yeah.
Thank you.
He won't let us know.
Burnett:
Each "king of the road" team
Has two videographers
in the van with them.
These guys are veterans
Who've made
countless skate videos.
See where that one
is not touching?
-Yeah.
-There's the shadow.
Burnett: And these guys
are crucial to each team.
The only way we can figure out
who won this thing
Is by looking
at the skate footage.
And if these guys don't
document it correctly...
-I mean, fuck.
-Let's do it.
...The team doesn't get
the points.
♪
♪ put the candles on the cake
♪ we're gonna celebrate
♪ we've got another year
-We're gonna go pick up cakes...
-Yeah.
...Just so we have ammo.
Hey, can we get one extra
for benny boy to eat?
♪ gonna celebrate
we're doing it.
♪ got another year
yes.
♪ and we're all here
Got so many.
♪ you got your
birthday get-up on ♪
[ speaks indistinctly ]
oh, the good,
dense ones.
Raspberry cake.
D way's dessert.
Hit an opponent with cake
from your vehicle.
Burnett: A lot
of these challenges are based
On memorable moments
in skateboarding history,
So a lot of the younger guys,
when they see it,
They're, like, "what is this?"
D way's dessert.
This is based on danny way
In the plan b
"questionable" video.
There's a throwaway shot
of him and colin
Riding around at night...
Shit's gonna go down.
...Throwing cake at complete
strangers from their car,
Just basically
being teenage assholes.
30 years later,
we resurrect that moment
Into this challenge.
You get 50 points.
Let's roll up and cake him.
Stevie's sitting right up there.
I can get him.
-Get him. Watch out.
-Get the camera ready.
-Camera ready.
-Camera ready.
-You got the camera ready?
Ah,
these fuckers are back.
-Dude.
-God damn it.
-Oh, god!
-Yeah.
-Oh, fuck!
-[ laughs ]
-Boom! Get in!
[ indistinct shouting ]
[ laughter ]
We got hit with a twinkie cake.
Caked his ass, got stevie.
-Check, baby!
-Check!
Hey, since we're done,
let me get a pound cake.
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
-I'll fucking cake it up.
-Have at 'em, dudes.
♪
Smyth:
Well, as soon as he gets this,
We're gonna be out.
♪ come on
♪ make a wish, make a wish
[ cheers and applause ]
♪ make a wish, make a wish
Fuck, yeah!
♪ make a wish, make a wish
The head counts
as an extra wheel.
Let's get outta here!
Hell of a first spot.
[ the barbazons'
"bad catholics" plays ]
[ vocalizing ]
Walker: Jaws, you gotta do
the butt chug again, man.
Raybourn:
That's the gnarliest drop in.
Tail drop right there.
-Is that a drop in?
-Tail drop in?
-Yeah, that's it.
-Ben's got it.
♪ I take confession
on a Saturday night ♪
All right,
let's go check this thing.
Let's go checky.
Go on this one.
That one's got, like, concrete.
Off the ledge
would be sick as fuck!
This one's fine.
There's a challenge
that is gnarliest drop in,
And we're just going for that,
But you don't know
that you win that
until it's over.
Burnett: Another way
the teams can earn points
Is through the highest,
longest, most.
Only one team
can earn the points for this,
And it's not judged
until the end.
Highest, longest, most
Is where you can really
rack up points
And push your team to the top.
Fucking first try, baby!
Bring it!
-Bang it out!
-Bring it!
-For the points!
-Bring it!
-Yoo!
Get it!
Oh!
Oh! Oh!
Oh!
-Yeah!
-Fuck, yeah, dude!
-Yes!
-Yes.
[ crossing signal dinging ]
dude,
you're a psycho.
-With the train coming.
-Oh, right on.
-Oh, with the train!
-Yes.
With the train.
You got it!
Come on, baby,
right here.
Hey.
The train.
[ grunts ]
[ train whistle blowing ]
Yeah!
[ cheers ]
-Ohh!
-Man.
You good?
You got it. Come on, baby.
Right here.
♪
-Right here.
-Sick, dude.
You got this. So easy.
Right now, baby.
Right here.
Bring it, dude!
Bring it!
Right here, ben, this is it!
[ claps hands ]
Right fucking here, baby!
-Ben, right here.
Right here.
Easy, baby!
-Yoo!
-Right here.
-Yes!
-Yeah!
[ cheers ]
Oh, my god!
Fuck yeah!
-Fuck yeah, dude!
-Yeah!
-God damn it.
-Get the fuck out of here!
[ indistinct chatter ]
That is so gnarly.
[ indistinct chatter ]
Raybourn: Yeah, that was
fucking scary, dude.
It was --
it was gnarly, for sure.
I'm still shaky.
Aw, sick.
Hell, yeah.
Mike's got a ton
of friends up here in seattle,
And, uh, he's got a friend
Who's gonna send us a pin
to a skate park.
They got,
like, quarter pipes, ledges,
Mannys, fucking stairs.
I think everything we need.
[ the mystery light's "what
happens when you turn the devil
down" plays ]
Get some shit quick.
[ engine starts ]
This dude is tight.
He's got no seat,
and he's drinking a 40.
♪ I had a drink with the devil
What's your name?
My name's louie dawgs.
Louie dawgs.
Dude, clint, good to meet you.
♪
♪ could be the one he said
♪ what happens when you turn
the devil down? ♪
-Whoo!
-Yeah, he got it.
-Yeah, baby!
-Hell, yeah.
-Unh!
-Thanks, brother. Hell, yeah.
He's a homie.
Yeah.
♪
♪
It's louie dawgs.
-Louie dawgs?
-Mm-hmm.
This, uh --
this park's the shit.
It's got, like, all the best
things in the park
Crammed into one
tiny, little morsel.
I love this park.
It's not too big.
It's not like, um,
the dude that built it
Was, like, trying to be
the gnarliest dude
That ever built
the gnarliest park.
"it's gonna kill ya" park.
It's perfect.
♪
Fuck yeah, dude.
You did it?
Yeah.
Case:
It's first day, couple hours in.
We're getting adjusted
to the process.
John!
Headstand.
Man: Get it, baby.
-Oh!
-Oh, shit! Sorry.
♪
Land that shit.
-Oh!
-Yeah.
Walker: A lot of the tricks
are, like, catered
To, like,
certain dudes on the teams.
You know, like,
there'll be, like, one trick
That one guy on the team
has done, you know,
So they'll throw it in there.
And then sometimes, you know,
there's tricks
That, like, just, nobody's done.
♪
Oh, my god.
Rooney:
He has to do a backside 5050,
And then he's got
to lay down into a coffin,
And then roll in on his back
Like a coffin
down the transition.
Do you go like this
or like this?
Probably like that.
I've never seen it done.
It's definitely a difficult,
weird trick, you know?
It's a "king of the road" trick,
for sure.
Fuck!
[ skateboard clatters ]
Man, it hurts so bad,
every time.
-Yeah.
-It's really hard.
And I thought it was just
Gonna be funny and easy,
but it's hard.
My back hurts now.
[ happy diving's "so bunted"
plays ]
[ cheers ]
Rooney: I think we're gonna mark
that one in the book,
And I think it'll work.
It's king of the road, you know?
Like, everything
can't be textbook.
He's starting
to fuck up his back,
So he's already done.
It's sort of a team contest --
a brand contest in a way.
Like you're up against them,
but every one of these guys
Is, like, competitive
with themselves.
♪ they call my name
-Oh!
-Yes.
Man: Oh! Oh!
♪
♪ and when I've lost my way
[ all groan ]
♪ just waiting
for a better day ♪
right here, mike.
♪ to come around and say
you're doing fine ♪
[ cheers ]
-Oh, my god!
-I earned it.
-Oh, my god.
-Fuck yeah.
♪
Wow.
-That was gnarly.
-Thank you.
Case: I never really felt
like people thought
We were gonna win
the first year,
And then the second year,
people kind of came around,
Like, "holy shit,
they did really good."
And then for this one now,
it's like,
I'm actually, like,
hearing people
Thinking like
we're gonna threepeat.
Shit,
I always go into it thinking
We're the underdogs every year.
We're up against chocolate.
I'm, like, "damn, they could --
They could take it.
"parking reserved
for pastor and wife only."
That's us.
[ laughs ]
Smyth: Scarfing material.
Eat a page out of the book.
Oh, let's eat that one
with no ink on the back.
Yeah, less ink.
Better, huh?
Yeah.
Man:
Are you gonna eat that?
I mean, fuck,
someone's gotta do it, right?
I might as well eat
a piece of paper.
[ laughs ]
♪
Tastes like chicken,
you know?
-Tastes like chicken?
-Yeah.
What kind of fucking chicken
you eating?
[ laughs ]
♪ neon lights can look
like rainbows ♪
Yo, ra,
let me get a big bite, dude.
♪ to a young man strong
for the dreams ♪
I'll try to swallow this
right here.
♪ but the colors soon fade
into tear drops ♪
♪ if you miss your chance
on a train bound for glory ♪
Yeah.
Whoo!
♪ I been chasing dreams
since I was 20 ♪
♪ same faded love 1,000 times
♪ I traveled all across
this country ♪
It's -- making progress.
♪ looking for my place
on a train bound for glory ♪
[ cheers ]
♪ waiting on a train
bound for glory ♪
It's so thick.
Feel this fucking paper.
Man: I mean, dude,
blend it in a smoothie.
Use it as a piece of cheese
on a burger.
Whatever I'd be doing,
I'd be doing it with food, dude.
Like, just chewing paper
is so gnarly.
♪ tryin' to catch a train
bound for glory ♪
On the next
"king of the road"...
I'mma just do it, you know,
just try to get points.
-Let's go!
-Fucking do it.
1, 2, 3, 4!
3, 4!
-Whoa!
-Oh!
-[ screams ]
-[ laughs ]
Oh, my!
♪
Oh, yeah,
she's gonna be bummed.
Yeah, daddy.
All right, well, who's up?
-Oh!
-Oh!
-Oh! [ laughs ]
-check!
Roy: [ laughs ]
Yeah.