Kim Possible (2002–2007): Season 1, Episode 17 - The Twin Factor - full transcript

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(wind whistling )

(coyotes howling )

(beeping )

Hey, Frankie, you got
my iced mocha?

Maybe you ought
lay off the caffeine.

(yells )

It keeps you awake.

Well, done, Shego.

Dr. Drakken, stop!

I give the orders.

You do not tell me to stop.



(alarm blaring )

I do when I haven't shut down
the alarm system yet.

Can we pick up the pace?

You're the one
who set off the alarm.

Let's just steal your
stupid whatever-it-is
and get out of here.

That back talk is what slows
down our entire operation.

I demand obedience!

(chuckling ):
From me?

Please.

If my latest scheme works,
obedience is what I shall have.

(evil laughter )

Oh.

♪ Oh, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ I'm your basic average girl ♪



♪ And I'm here
to save the world ♪

♪ You can't stop me
'cause I'm... ♪

♪ Kim Possible ♪

♪ There is nothing I can't do ♪

♪ When danger calls,
just know that I am on my way ♪

♪ Know that I am on my way ♪

♪ It doesn't matter where
or when there's trouble ♪

♪ If you just call my name ♪

♪ Kim Possible ♪

♪ Call me, beep me
if you want to reach me ♪

♪ When you want to page me,
it's okay ♪

♪ Whenever you need me, baby ♪

♪ Call me, beep me
if you want to reach me ♪

♪ Call me, beep me
if you want to reach me ♪

♪ Doesn't matter where,
doesn't matter when ♪

♪ Doesn't matter when ♪

♪ I will be there for you
till the very end ♪

♪ Danger or trouble,
I'm there on the double ♪

♪ You know that you always
can call Kim Possible. ♪

Kim...

(horn blaring )
(gasps )

Give me that!

Sure.

What are you doing?

So what?

I'm your new screen saver?

You're everybody's
new screen saver.

We wrote an e-mail program

that beamed it to everyone
in Middleton.

Oh, right, like you
jokers have the brains

to write a program like...

(phone ringing )

Hello.

Hi, Kim. It's Bonnie.

Um... hi.

Is that zit cream

or should I, like,
call a paramedic?

It's moisturizer, Bonnie.

Don't think

you're off the hook.

(beeping )

Hey, Wade. What's the sitch?

Drakken and Shego just raided

a top-secret research facility
in the Southwest.

Can you set up a ride
for tomorrow?

Already set.

The lab is sending their plane.

Cool. Anything else?

Yeah...

Next time, rinse and spit

before they take the picture.

(growls )

(yawns )

(groans )

Morning, Kimmy.

I made you a big breakfast.

Got to carb up
for the adventure
that lies ahead.

Just a break-in
at a top-secret lab.

So not the drama.

Break-in?
Top-secret lab?

We were talking about
baby-sitting the twins.

Baby-sitting?

We've got our spousal encounter
today, remember?

Oh, the thing at Lake Middleton?
That's today?

You betcha.

Your mother and I get
to reconnect emotionally

and do some serious fly fishing.

I'm not sure who
picked the venue

but it should be fun.

Hon, don't forget your hat.

Um, speaking of forgetting...

I totally spaced
on the baby-sitting.

Kimmy, you made a commitment.

Two commitments, actually.

I'm supposed to go
on a mission today.

You'll just have
to take the boys.

Mom, can you please
tell Dad that's a bad idea?

Oh, Kimmy, I'm sure Jim
and Tim would love to visit

a top-secret lab with you.

Fine.

Like I can really take
those two with me on a mission.

Ha, they're such...

Little freaks!

I'm about to become
an only child.

Jim, Tim... (gasps )

Bye, Mom, bye, Dad.

See you tonight, Kimmy.

And thanks for
watching the boys.

Have fun on your mission now.

But easy on the snacks.

Remember, candy is dandy

but fruit helps you poop.

Fruit... check.

You trashed my room.

You trashed my room!

We needed your
trilithium power cell.

Here, you can have
the rest back.

You destroyed my communicator

to make some stupid toy?

It's not a toy.

It's a silicon phase disrupter.

Handheld.

Give me my batteries,
you tweebs.

I'm not a dweeb.

Tweeb... twin dweebs.
Dweeb squared.

We may never be able to talk
to Wade again.

Gimme.

Ron, why can't
my brothers be normal?

They're relatively normal,
for twins, I mean.

At least they don't speak
their own weirdo language.

Hick-a-bick-a-boo?

Hoo-sha.

They're just so... ugh.

Like a ten-year-old could
really build a phase disrupter

or whatever it is?

Wade's ten and he builds
all sorts of stuff.

Wade's a super genius.

He aced high school and college
in like eight months.

Maybe they're just pacing
themselves... like me.

Ta-da.

Thank you, Rufus.

(horn honking "La Cucaracha" )

That must be our ride.

Okay, does anybody
need to take care
of any business?

No.
No.

Business?

Like what? Banking?

Ron...

Business.

As in, there won't be
any rest stops.

Kim, the boys are ten.

They don't need to take nap.

I don't think rest
is going to be an issue.

(whispering )

Oh, right.

Uh, excuse me.

Thanks for letting me
bring along

the terrible two,
Mr. Gemanini.

How bad could they be?

Where does this hose go?

To the back of the plane.

What's it do?
Airplane stuff.

Is it pneumatic or hydraulic?

Its I-don't-know-ic.

Check it out?
Got to.

What are you guys doing?

I had a twin brother.

We were quite a handful,
let me tell you.

But I turned out okay.

What about your brother?

(chuckles )

He'll get out in five years
with good behavior.

(bell ringing )

RON:
Hey, don't touch that.

Kim, they touched.

Pressure gauges reading zero.

We've got a major malfunction.

TWINS:
Sorry, Kim.

Two major malfunctions.

(groaning )

Tweebs!

(oxygen hissing )

Jim, Tim?

We just wanted to know
what was in that hose.

Why?
Because it
was there.

It was hydraulic fluid.

And what better way to find out?

(grunting )

(panting )

(grunts )

Oh!

Ooh!

(grunts )

(creaking )

Come on.

(grunts ):
Gotcha!

(monitors beeping )

(gasping )

(gasps )

We're alive!

Hmm?

You have some reallynasty
breath there, Rufus.

Yeah, lay off the blue cheese,
will you, buddy?

(groaning )

DR. BORTAL:
Kim Possible!

Thank you for coming.

I'm Dr. Syrus Bortal.

What happened to the pilot?

Overexposure.
To what?

Them.

JIM:
A secret lab!

Check it out.

Those two

in a top-secret lab?

This could be a bigger threat

to the free world than Drakken.

Not "could be."
Definitely.

(laughing )

(muttering )

BOTH:
Shego?

Mm-hmm, Shego.

Dr. Bortal?

Boys, please.

Here we go.

That's a very delicate
piece of equipment
called a...

A silicon phase disrupter.

How did you know that?

We're making one, too.

Except mine is real.

BOTH:
So is ours!

A hand-held unit?

It simply is not possible.

Anything's possible.

For a Possible.

(chuckling ):
Boys, boys, boys.

You know, when I was a boy

I liked to make believe
I was making

rocket ships and blaster rays.

Wedo make rockets...

...and blaster rays.

Hmph! Such cute lads.

(raspberry )

Doctor, what exactly

was in the safe?

My latest project...

The neuro-compliance chip!

Mm-hmm... let's pretend
I don't know what that is.

It's a microcomputer

that overrides the brain
and the nervous system.

Total mind control.

Um, I don't think so.

That would be, like,
ferociously unethical.

Dr. Bortal would not invent

something like that.

Right?

(chuckles )

Well...

"ferociously unethical"
is a little harsh.

Drakken has total
mind control power?

(groans )

Oh, man!

Yet another "take over
the world" thing.

That, or he's going
to force people

to listen to those stories

about his twisted childhood.

Then, in fourth grade,
I developed a ray

that allowed me to control
rubber products.

They said I was mad,
but after that

no one could best me

in foursquare,
tetherball, dodgeball.

Isn't that fascinating?

Fascinating,
Dr. Drakken.

Want to hear more
scintillating stories

from my formative years, hmm?

Yes, Dr. Drakken.

No time.

I have to make more chips

if I want the whole world
to be blindly obedient to me...

And you know I do, Shego.

Yes, Dr. Drakken.

DR. BORTAL:
Ms. Possible

Ms. Possible,
Ms. Possible, please.

Our security officer
searched the lab already.

They don't have
spectrometer sunglasses.

(whirring )

Fascinating.
Where did you get those?

Ten-year-old supergenius.

Your brothers?

(scoffs ):
So not.

(whirring )

Got something?

Maybe.

Hmm. Wade, are you getting this?

It-It's a leaf...
or a piece of one.

Oh, from the Quoalatuk fir.

And I'm betting they don't grow
in the desert.

They don't growanywhere...

except at the foot
of Tishu Falls

in the Peruvian rain forest.

Okay. So, we go to Peru,
find Drakken

grab the compliance chip

and get the tweebs back
home before dinner.

Where are the tweebs?

(explosion )

(Rufus groans )

(moaning )

You guys totally
embarrassed me
back there.

What was up with that?

We were trying to fix
the doctor's phase disrupter.

Was it even broken?

No, it was lame.

Isn't time to pull our chutes?

No way, free falling is cool.

Kim!

Whoa!

I see... water?

Text-scan it, Wade.

Getting anything?

Huge energy readings...
halfway up.

There's probably an entrance
behind the falls.

Thanks, Wade.

Why are the entrances never
just, you know, like, a door?

Okay, Ron.

I'll infiltrate Drakken's
lair and get the chip.

You keep an eye on the tweebs.

Oh, sure

giveme the dangerous assignment.

We want to go, too.

Yeah.

We could be backup.

Okay...

back up.

Don't touch anything.

Mitrometer.

(robotic ):
Yes, Dr. Drakken.

Nano-weld resister.

Yes, Dr. Drakken.

I love this.

Hand me a fork.

Yes, Dr. Drakken.

(clamoring )

(laughs ):
Get me a dodo bird.

Yes, Dr. Drakken.

(laughs )
(clamoring )

Sike! Dodo birds are extinct.

Ah, I'm being silly.

There, I'm already done.

A new compliance chip.

Isn't it lovely?

Yes, it is lovely.

Can't you show
a little more enthusiasm?

Hoorah.

Kim Possible?

How did she get so close?

Why didn't you tell me?

I was looking for a dodo bird.

Wait.

This is delicious.

(gasps )

Hello.

(beeping )

(bird caws )

I'm bored.

Bored is good.

Bored is safe.

No, it's not.
It's boring.

Kim's taking forever.

We should go up there
and see what's going on.

Huh! Hyah! Unh! Unh! Hyah!

Huh?

(stammering )

Kim said to stay put.

Well, Kim's not here.

Yes, I am.

Kim, why are you
dressed like Shego?

(robotic ):
That is not important.

Okay...

so where's the chip?

On her forehead.

(yells )

Dr. Drakken will see you now.

Hoo-sha.

Hold my naked mole rat, boys.

I'm going in.

Give me the chip.
Where's this hand go?

Where's this hand go?

You watching this hand?

(yells )

Ooh.
Ow.

Did you really think
it would be that easy?

Well, I hoped.

Dr. Drakken has ordered the
capture of Ron Stoppable.

He remembered my name.

Initiate big sister
capture sequence.

And we can't even
get in trouble.

Sweet.

Get ready.

Alley-oop!

Gotcha!

You captured Kim Possible.

No big.
No big.

Hick-a-bick-a-boo.

Hoo-sha.

RON:
You know, guys...

(grunts )

(grunting )

If Kim were here...

(groans )
Huh?

Must capture Ron Stoppable.

Must capture Ron Stoppable.

Must capture Ron Stoppable.

If Kim were here and
not under Drakken's control

she'd cook up a plan.

A plan, mm-hmm.

Let yourself get captured.

A plan that doesn't
involve that.

Drakken doesn't know about us.
He ordered Kim to get you.

So that's all she cares about.

Let her take you
into his lair.
We'll follow.

Oh, and get the communicator.

To call for help.

Good plan, mm-mm, yeah.

No.

We take the power cell
out of the communicator...

and put it in...

our silicon phase disrupter...

which will jam the control
frequency of that chip.

That's why Bortal had
a disrupter in his lab.

To override the chip.

This finishing each other's
sentences thing

is really freaking me out.

Here she comes.
Go!

(yells )

What up, Kim?

So, how's the whole mind
control thing working out?

You must be taken
to Dr. Drakken.

(monkey screeches )

SHEGO:
You are very smart.

And look good in this light.

Fine, Shego, don't wear it out.

Dr. Drakken

you are very smart.

And look good in this light.

Now, see, she sells it.

So, Kim Possible

you climbed down the waterfall

and captured your
very best friend.

I like this mind control
thing very much.

KIM:
Yes, Dr. Drakken.

Good.

Now go secure the
perimeter or something.

What about the hairless rodent?

Stop!

(shrieks )

Give me that.

Good.

Now, Shego, Kim

destroy that little bald thing.

Uh-oh. Huh?

Who are you?

The kid who's going
to bring you down.

Oh, really?

You and what arm...

Hoo-sha!

A clone!

Yeah, that's right, loser.

Shego! Kim!

Forget about the rodent.

Get those little clones.

(sighs )

Stall them.
Right. Okay.

Which door? Which door?

(screams )

Wrong door!

(pounding )

Don't look down.

Don't look down.

Don't look... (yells )

(echo, rumbling )

(yelling )

Ha! Ha!

(crash, yelling )

Oh, no, oh, no, pain.

Ooh, please, no.

Everybody stop!

I'm on to you.
You're not clones.

You're just
garden-variety twins.

You don't give the orders here.

I do if I've got
a silicon phase disrupter.

A silicon phase disrupter?
Really?

Hoo-sha.
Wait.

How could two little boys

carry a silicon phase disrupter
up the cliff?

It's portable.

(laughs ):
Portable.

(laughs )

Oh, you really had me
going there a moment.

Hick-a-bick-a-boo?

Hick-a-bick-a-boo.

(clicks )

Uh...

Hmm.

Uh-oh.

(laughs )

Portable silicon
phase disrupter.

I knew it couldn't be done.

Are you sure
the battery's in right?

The plus goes
with the plus thing

and the little slash
goes with the other...

not plus.

Nice outfit.

Nice apron.

Okay, doc.

For future reference, the chip

made me obey every command

but I was aware of
exactly what was happening.

The whole time?

Dodge ball and dodos?!

Ooh.

Do you have any idea

what listening to you is like?!

It is so boring!

Shouldn't we go after them?

Nah, whatever Shego's
going to do to Drakken

is ten times worse than anything
I could come up with.

I'm sure Jim and Tim could think
of something cruel and unusual.

I think Jim and Tim
have come up with enough ideas

for one day.

And every one of them rocked.

For tweebs, you guys
are pretty amazing.

Oh...

Ew, gross.

Are you feeling okay?

Come on. Let's get out here.

(snoring )

Hey, everybody, good news.

Our marriage
is stronger than ever.

And we caught a mess of trout.

It looks like somebody
took very good care

of her little brothers.

Aw... when they're
asleep like this

they hardly seem evil at all.

You were ten once, too, Kimmie.

Yeah, but I wasn't
as bad as them.

Uh...
Well...

Was I?

You were... spirited.

No baby-sitter alive
could handle you.

Not that we could find
anyone willing to try

after a certain point.

Honey, what have the boys
got on their foreheads?

(gasps )

Huh?

Wha...?

Can't catch me!

Oh, yes, I can.

Don't hit me
with that.
That hurts.

(shouting )

I finally understand
how special my brothers are.

And I love them to bits,
but sometimes...

nothing says bedtime
like a little mind control.