Killing It (2022–…): Season 2, Episode 3 - It Follows - full transcript
Isaiah has a new life, a new job and a new relationship in his quest to reinvent himself, but one mistake awakens an evil force that threatens to destroy everything he's built.
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- Things are good,
they really are.
We have a lot of fun together.
I mean, he's thoughtful
and romantic,
and he surprises me.
- I'm sensing a "but" coming.
- But he puts up walls.
Any time I try to ask him
about his day or his childhood,
he finds a way to
steer it back to me.
- And do you not enjoy that?
Some people like getting
to talk about themselves.
- I do.
I think it's really
sweet that he listens.
But I want to be closer.
His job is hard.
He treats kids with cancer.
- Oh, my goodness.
- And I get not wanting to
bring that home with him,
but I want him to know he can
talk to me about everything.
- And how do you feel
about this, Todd?
Do you feel like
there are things
you don't talk to Maya about?
- No, that's not me at all.
Ask anybody I've worked
with at the hospital
for the last 15 years.
Dr. Todd's an open book!
- You hated that.
- I didn't hate it, okay?
All right, I did
hate it a little bit,
but me being open
is me telling you that
I hate it, so I'm cured.
That Dr. Kristen is good.
Look, I know we haven't
been together that long,
but it's just, I
really like you.
I'm too old to be playing games.
- Girl, I'm not playing games.
You wanna know more about me?
- Yes.
- Okay, all right,
all right, here we go.
Um...
- Okay.
- Three.
- Three what?
- Number of times
I peed in the bed
after watching "Predator 2."
- Oh, my God, stop!
I don't wanna hear about
some movie you saw.
Get deep with me, Todd.
Okay, all right. I'm
building up to it.
Um... 11.
- 11 what?
- I was 11 years
old when I found out
Santa Claus wasn't real.
- Aww, so you're that
kinda cute, okay.
- See, I don't wanna
even tell you nine,
'cause I ain't want you
to think of me like this.
I want you to know
your man is tough.
- I don't need all your traumas.
I just wanna, like, meet
some of your work friends
and maybe see a picture
of you from childhood.
- I wanna see a
picture you, too,
and not some cheerleading
glamour shot.
I want those awkward years.
Talkin' 'bout one
big front tooth
and one little front tooth.
- Okay? I want
that chaos mouth.
- You're so stupid.
You're so stupid.
- Hi, Dr. Todd.
- Hey, how you doin', Duncan?
Yo, Dame!
Dame!
Oh, shit. Oh, shit!
- This motherfucker.
Oh, God. Oh, God.
Yeah!
- The fuck are you doing?
- I got a hover drone.
I'm on my Green Goblin shit.
- But why?
- Well, you know how I
been afraid of the road
ever since I got
hit by that truck?
Ain't no trucks in the sky.
Before you pass
judgment, man, peep it.
Gravity ain't got shit on me!
Oh, oh!
And it says that if I lose
a couple hundred pounds,
it get even higher.
- How much that shit cost?
- Like 10 grand.
- 10 grand?
- But my dude Bugs says
it's a good investment.
- You're getting
financial advice
from some dude named Bugs?
- Yeah. Bugs is smart.
He got in on Uber early.
He was the second driver.
- You can't keep
wasting money, Dame!
We're on the run
from Rodney Lamonca, remember?
- What?
All I heard was
"on the run," bro.
- Get your ass in the house!
Get your ass in the house!
This bag of cash is all we have
left, and we're running low.
So please, no more $10,000
Green Goblin drones.
Actually, I'ma be an asshole
and go ahead and say,
no more Green Goblin
drones at any price.
- I mean, if it's money we need,
we could always rob a bank.
Bugs says Phoenix a soft town.
- No, no, no, we
don't want to attract
any attention to ourselves.
No crimes, no scams.
No scams?
What about that scam that you
running on that Maya chick?
- That's real.
Maya's my girlfriend.
I went to therapy
with her today.
Ain't no scam worth that.
- But you didn't go to therapy.
Dr. Todd did.
- Okay, fine, yes, she
thinks I'm a doctor.
It's a stupid-ass lie that
I told when we first met
'cause I had three Jack and
Cokes on an empty stomach,
and I ain't think we'd
be falling in love.
Haven't you lied about
something before?
- Remember I told you
about that hover drone
costing 10 grand?
It was really 15.
- We takin' that
shit back right now.
Where Bugs live?
- Yo, Dame Train! What
can I do for you today?
Ooh, I just got some new 3D TVs.
You want a T-shirt cannon?
Bet you guys came here
in a boring-ass car.
How'd you like to go home
on a mini motorcycle?
- Oh, damn.
- Everybody's all
looking at you like,
"Hey, who's that?
What's their story?"
- No, no, we just wanna
keep a low profile.
- Oh, no, mini motorcycle
is low as shit.
It's like an inch
off the ground.
- I said no. Thanks.
- Wait, I know who this is.
Mr. Isaiah Clifton Foster.
Hey, nice to meet you, bro.
- What?
The fuck, Dame?
How this fool know my real name?
- I mean, he told me
about his divorce,
so I figured I had to open
up to him about something.
But don't worry, I ain't
give him no other details.
- Hey, how's stuff
with Craig, by the way?
I know there's a
lot of anger there,
but you only get
one brother, right?
- I'm sorry, Bugs, was it?
Could you please forget
everything you know about me?
- I see how it is.
You got trust issues.
Hey, that's why
I think it's good
that Maya is bringing
you to therapy.
- Oh, I swear to fuckin' God!
- Hey, I'm sorry. Now
look, now we're fighting.
Hey, what you say we
just start all over?
Would you like to do
a little bit of coke?
- No!
I just wanna return
this Green Goblin drone
you sold my boy.
- Seems like it'd
be pretty funny
to be on a drone all
coked up, but okay.
Anyway, I don't
have the 20 grand.
- 20 grand, Dame?
What happened to 15?
- But here's what
I can do for you.
I could take it back
for store credit.
Bugs Money.
- I want cash, not
fuckin' Bugs Money.
- Oh, well, if
it's cash you need,
I mean, Phoenix is a soft town.
- We're not
committing any crimes.
- Gonna have to do
something eventually.
That one little bag of
cash not gon' last forever.
- There's better ways
to get paid, Dame.
- Like what?
- I don't know, we...
We can get legit jobs.
- Oh, you're sick, man.
- This motherfucker.
- How you gonna get a job?
Dr. Todd can't pass
a background check,
and you don't want to be
paying taxes as Isaiah Foster,
'cause then your boy
Rodney Lamonca's gonna find you,
and since you're the only person
that knows that
he killed Noah...
- Stop knowing
shit about my life!
- Wait.
If you're willing to
use up your Bugs Money,
I might have a
solution for y'all.
So my boy works at the
Department of Records.
He issues the
death certificates.
But sometimes he, um...
"forgets" to issue the
death certificates.
- You talking for real forgets
or crime guy forgets?
- You know I'm
talking crime guy.
- Nice.
- Yeah, so if someone dies,
and they ain't got no family,
my guy sells their info
to the highest bidder.
- So this is a new identity.
- Social Security
number, birth date,
list of previous residences,
everything you need to
become a upstanding citizen.
♪ Won't nobody know it's you ♪
♪ It's just so fresh and clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and
so clean, clean ♪
- ♪ You're becoming
someone new ♪
both: ♪ It's just
so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and
so clean, clean ♪
- So I'm...
- I'm like, I'm like,
what's even going on right now?
I am now...
Marty Simkowitz?
- Damn.
Hey, that feels like it's
always been your name.
- You think people really
gon' buy this shit?
- They buy me as a doctor.
You've seen the neighbors.
I get, like, 20 "Hi,
Dr. Todds" a day.
- Yeah, but we in Phoenix.
Those "Hi, Dr. Todds," that's
not them being friendly.
That's, "Hi, I'm watching
your Black ass, Dr. Todd."
- I don't know what
he's going on about.
I mean, like, there's
hella Black people
in Arizona, right?
There's you guys. Um...
Damn. Oh, there's, like, a
bunch of the Phoenix Suns.
Y'all are thriving up in here!
- Okay, you guarantee
this is gonna work?
You'll pay me back if I
can't get a job with this,
and not fuckin' Bugs Money.
- Hey, okay, let's calm down.
There is no need to
besmirch Bugs Money.
- Mm-hmm.
- But yes, I guarantee.
It's all gonna turn out
fine, Mr. Simkowitz.
- Mr. Simkowitz is my dad.
Call me Marty.
- Marty.
Look, I'm in love with you.
I was blown away
by your interview.
I mean, the passion that you
have for energy brokering.
- What can I say?
It's what I live for.
The thrill of...
brokering energy.
- I would have hired you on
the spot, but we have HR,
and they make us do these full
criminal background checks.
And yours came back,
and I do have one question.
When can you start?
You aced it, bro!
Fuckin' Simkowitz!
- Hey, Marty.
- Marty.
Fuckin' Marty!
- Looks like that
forehead hit puberty...
Oh, really?
- Before the rest
of your body did.
You look like a little
mini Tommy from "Martin."
- That's 'cause my brother
was a bad photographer.
He didn't know how
to work them angles.
- Wait, you have a brother?
- Yep.
- Okay, anything else
you wanna share about him
besides he took a bad
photo of you 30 years ago?
- Sorry I didn't
mention it earlier,
but we kinda had a little
bit of a rough patch.
But I'm open now, so go ahead.
What you wanna know about Craig?
- Craig. Okay.
So where does Craig live?
- Florida.
- Older or younger?
- Older.
- And what does he do?
- He's a farmer,
which sounds weird.
He grows saw palmetto berries.
They put 'em in a lot of
men's health supplements.
It's a billion-dollar industry.
It's actually pretty smart.
- So what happened?
Why the rough patch?
- Guess I always expect
him to have my back,
and one day he didn't.
But I'm sure he's feeling
really bad about it.
He calls me every day,
leaving voice mails
like a psycho.
- Why don't you pick up?
What, you're afraid
he's gonna say something
you don't want to hear?
- All right.
That's enough, Dr. Kristen.
- Okay, I'ma talk to
him when I'm ready.
- Aww, well, I'm glad
you shared that with me.
Okay, you ready?
- Mm-hmm.
- This is my picture.
It's from fourth grade.
And don't ask me why I
look like a yacht captain.
Cute.
Todd.
Todd.
- Huh?
Yeah, yeah. I'm
sorry, I was just...
Let's see Captain Maya, okay?
- Mm-hmm.
- Ears built like
a African drum.
I know you not talking.
- That forehead was
like, "Damn, Gina!"
Like, it's out
there.
Whatever.
So you coming over tonight?
- Huh?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, yeah.
You know, I would, but I got
a surgery in the morning,
and I kinda wanna
be fresh for it.
- Well, give me a kiss.
- Whatever Rodney
Lamonca's paying you,
I could pay you more!
- Who the fuck is
Rodney Lamonca?
- The guy you're working for.
- No, I work for American
West Receivables.
I'm a debt collector.
And you owe us
$73,000, Mr. Simkowitz.
- Okay, I'm sorry, man,
but you got the wrong guy.
- I've got the right guy, Marty.
348 South Cactus Shadow Lane.
Oh, congrats on the
new job, by the way.
- Look, I'm telling you, man...
- You know what?
Did you really think
that we were gonna
stop looking for you?
Did you really think that
RadioShack would forget?
- RadioShack?
Oh, come on, man, RadioShack
went out of business.
- But debts never die, Marty.
American West bought
up your account,
which means you owe us now.
73,000 large.
- Do I look like a
Marty Simkowitz to you?
My name's Todd.
- No, no, you don't
get to do that, Marty.
You don't just snap your fingers
and become someone else.
You made a mistake.
There have to be consequences.
That's how the past works.
It sticks with you.
Hmm. 9:00.
Saved by the bell.
See you soon, Marty.
- Hi, Dr. Todd.
- Hey, yo, Dame!
Oh. Yeah.
- Aw, what the fuck?
Dame, the hell are you doing?
Zay?
It's a light therapy
mask. Bugs sold it to me.
He says it harnesses the
awesome powers of lasers
to refresh your complexion.
This desert been
drying my ass out, man.
- Why you banging
around the bathroom?
- Oh, that's because I
couldn't find the door handle,
you know, 'cause all
I see is red shit.
- Then take off
the mask, dumbass!
- Uh-uh. No.
They say you have to leave
this thing on for 60 minutes.
It'll beep when it's done.
Oh, there it is.
How do I look?
I look younger?
- You look naked.
- That's 'cause I also bought
a robot that sucks your dick.
- Stop buying shit from Bugs,
and lock the front
door next time.
What the fuck?
Huh?
Coming!
Who the fuck are you?
- Hello, Mr. Simkowitz.
I'm with New Horizon
Collection Services,
and you owe $18,000
to Federal Health Conglomerated.
- Wait, this isn't
about RadioShack?
- Hey there, Marty.
So glad to finally
put a face to a name.
I'm from Baseline
Recovery Associates.
Can I come in?
- No.
- Can I come in?
- What y'all can both do is
get the fuck off my porch.
I'm not having
strangers in my house.
I'm not a
stranger. We're old friends.
- We are not fuckin' friends!
- Marty.
- Marty.
- Marty.
- Mr. Simkowitz.
- Marty.
- Marty!
- Marty, Marty, you
can't run from this.
- Marty!
- Mr. Simkowitz.
Open up the door!
- Marty...
- Yo, Zay, man, what
the fuck is going on?
- We gotta go find Bugs, man.
There's something wrong
with identity he sold me.
Marty, hey.
- Oh, shit, they everywhere.
- Marty!
- I mean, if somebody
ain't get rid
of that Green
Goblin drone we had,
we could just fly up out this...
- Man, get dressed!
We'll go out the back, fool.
- Hi, Dr. Todd.
- Duncan!
What's up, my man?
- I don't know if you saw,
but you have quite
a few visitors.
- Yes, Duncan.
Thank you, Duncan.
What kinda fuckin'
name is Bugs, anyway?
Fuckin' cartoon
rabbit motherfucker!
Yo, Bugs!
- Oh, shit.
So that's why I got such a
good deal on the SuckBot.
Going out of business sale.
- What the hell?
"Dear Marty, sorry
about all this.
"I wish I could explain
this to you in person.
"By the time you
get this letter,
I'll be hundreds
of miles away."
- Shit.
I timed this out
wrong. Damn it.
- What's up, Bugs?
It's all in the letter.
I spent a lot of
time on it, too.
Actually some rather beautiful
turns of phrase in there.
But you know what? I'm
just gonna step outside.
That way, you don't have
to read in front of me,
make us both feel
self-conscious.
- Not another fucking step.
Look, I understand how
you're feeling right now.
If you read the
letter, you'd know
that I bought Marty Simkowitz's
identity a year ago,
and I assumed it was
clean, just like you did.
- You told me it was clean.
I didn't assume anything.
- I mean, you assumed I
was telling you the truth.
He got
you with that, Z.
- It turns out this identity's
changed hands dozens of times.
But the debt collectors
just keep on comin'.
- I don't look like you,
and I definitely don't
look like a Simkowitz.
- They don't care.
The debt gets sold and
sold and sold again.
Corporations don't stop
to ask what we look like.
We're not even people to them.
We're just profits and losses.
Red ink and black.
To them, we're just
numbers on a page.
- That's some good shit, bro.
- It's from the letter.
- So what am I supposed to do?
- Find some other
sucker to pass it on to.
Until then, you gotta hide.
The debt collectors
can come to your house,
but they can't come inside
unless you let them in.
That's why I work from home.
And they can't contact
you before 8:00 a.m.
or after 9:00 p.m.
- I don't wanna know your
dumbass vampire rules.
You're gonna take
this identity back
like you promised me.
I'm done being...
- Marty Simkowitz.
I'm from Castle
Southwest Financial.
You owe $8,000 to
Bally Total Fitness.
- Don't look at me.
Guy you wanna talk
to is right over...
Motherfucker, where'd he go?
You didn't even
get his real name?
You're just out here
calling a grown man Bugs?
Shit,
stop calling me.
- You getting way too
worked up about this, bro.
They can't make you
pay. You ain't Marty.
What you think, they
gonna chase you around
and ruin your
relationship with Maya?
- Yes! That's what
I'm scared of.
Shit.
I see that now.
This is a big deal, man.
- Ah, fuck! Maya.
I'm supposed to
meet her for lunch.
Shit.
Where are my scrubs?
- Hi, Dr. Todd.
- Yes, Duncan. Hello,
Duncan, once again!
- So my sister's gonna ask
me, what do I think of her ex.
- Mm-hmm.
- And I'm like,
"He's an immature teenage boy
trapped in a
40-year-old man's body."
- Word?
- And then she says,
"Oh, we're getting
back together."
And I'm like, "Wow, you gonna
go back to that fuckboy?"
Like, I knew it was a setup.
She was just asking me
that, knowing she knows
that I don't even like him.
Stupid.
- Yeah, fuck her.
- My sister?
- Uh, I wasn't even listening.
How about we... How
about we get out of here?
- What is that supposed to mean?
I don't wanna make
out in your car.
Your seats don't
go back far enough.
- No, babe, like, we
should take a trip.
Maybe go out to the desert,
get a hotel, just the two of us.
- Okay, look at you
being all impulsive.
Okay, so when were you thinking?
'Cause next weekend
I have that...
- I think we should
go right now.
- Right now? Right now?
Babe, it's Tuesday.
- Well, I don't have any
more surgeries for the rest
of the week, and you can get
Caleb to do your showings.
Let him be useful for once.
- You just don't like
Caleb 'cause he's tall.
- No, I don't like Caleb
'cause you think he's tall.
6'1" is unremarkable.
- All right, let's go.
But I gotta go by the office
and talk to Tall Caleb
and then pack.
I'll get you at 6:00.
- Okay.
Or 5:00.
Wanna do 5:00? Let's do 5:00.
5:00's good.
This is about to be so much fun.
Ugh, my phone is about to die,
and I forgot to bring a charger.
Do you have one?
- What?
Nah, nah, nah.
Left at the crib.
- Oh, we're gonna
have to use your phone
for directions then.
- My phone?
- Yeah.
- It's off right now.
- And you can't turn it back on?
- Well, I'm trying
to be in the moment,
stay present with you, but...
Somebody's popular.
- Yeah, hospital's on my nuts.
You're so stupid.
What do we got?
Beet chips. Prickly
pear hard candies.
Okay, this isn't normal
bougie. This is stupid bougie.
Mm-hmm.
- Who could that be?
- Hello?
- I wish you told me you were
planning a trip,
Mr. Simkowitz.
- Nah, we're good.
- How's the room?
Are you enjoying the
prickly pear hard candy?
- Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
Thank you so much.
Just the front desk
checking to see
if we got everything we need.
- Okay, cool.
So you wanna go downstairs,
grab some drinks,
check out the hot tub?
- Or we just go to the bedroom.
Go to sleep. Call it a night.
It's 7:40.
- They say the first
day of the vacation,
you're supposed to just stay in.
- But aren't we
leaving tomorrow?
- You know what? You
right. You right.
I'm sorry, baby,
for being weird.
- Mm-hmm.
- My penis smells from
driving, so I think
I should just go
take a quick shower.
Just give me a quick
second, all right?
I'll be right back.
- Lands himself
locked up in jail.
- Baby, that was invigorating.
I needed that. What you up to?
- Sitting here,
watching Mario Lopez
describe the plot
of "Despicable Me 3"
on loop for an hour and a half.
- Gru is back!
- Wow, have I been in the shower
for an hour and a half?
I'm gonna make it up to you
with a glass of champagne.
- No, champagne's
not gonna do it.
- Wine?
- No!
- Henny?
- Don't play with me.
- Tequila?
- I want a margarita so big,
they're gonna have to
mix it in a trash can.
- Okay, you know what? One
trasharita for my girl.
- Lands himself locked up...
- Oh, my God.
- Now, when you say "trash can,"
are you thinking one of those
little guys under a desk,
or, like, one of those...
Those big dented metal ones?
- Yeah, there you go.
Oscar the Grouch style.
- Hello, Marty.
- Why is this man
calling you Marty?
- I don't know,
babe. I have no idea
why this guy would even be
speaking to us after 9:00 p.m.
- Oh, no. Jeez, you're
right. It is after 9:00.
I'm just gonna, uh, face
zero fucking consequences.
- Todd!
- There are rules against this.
- Todd.
- It's the law.
- Then file a complaint
with the government.
I look forward to seeing
you at my online hearing
in 18 months.
- Todd, what is going on?
- Your boyfriend is
a liar and a crook.
- What?
- No, no, I'm not.
- His name is not even Todd.
It's Marty Simkowitz,
and he owes $73,000
to RadioShack!
- Hey. Are you Troy Chubner?
- I don't know, Todd, are you?
- What? No.
- I'm Troy Chubner.
- I'm a debt collector
with Keystone Associates.
You owe $12,000 to Home
Depot, Mr. Chubner.
- No, no.
- Yes!
- No.
- Yes!
- No, I already spoke to someone
at Keystone about this.
Rachel, she said she
was gonna send me
a payment plan in the mail.
- Rachel quit.
- What the fuck is going on?
- Uh, listen, I'm a
debt collector too,
so I know that everybody
always tells you
that they're about to get
you your money, but I am.
I'm about to get you your money.
This guy is really
close to paying.
Tell him.
- No, I'm not.
- Yes, he is.
- What the fuck is going on?
Wow, I'm leaving, Todd.
- Baby. Baby. Maya.
- This is ridiculous.
- You think I know this dude?
Look at the motherfucker.
- Marty, give me a hand.
- Get off me, man!
- Come on, we're talking...
- Get off of me, man!
- Come on, he's...
Look, he's totally freaked out.
All right, here's the thing.
Home Depot, they
totally messed up.
They sold me a wicker
trash can hideaway,
but raccoons kept
getting into it.
The company even admitted that
the product was defective.
Let me pull up the email.
It's right here. I got
it right here somewhere.
- I know where
you live, Chubner!
- Just wait for me.
I'll be right back.
I swear to God, right back.
- Maya!
- I knew it was too
good to be fuckin' true.
- Maya, wait! Maya!
- Oh, every fuckin' time.
- Girl...
- Every time...
- Maya!
- I open myself up.
- Maya, I'm sorry.
This lunatic thinks
I'm somebody named
Marty Simkowitz.
He came to the hospital.
He's been following me for days.
- Is that why you wanted
to get out of town?
Why didn't you just say that?
- 'Cause I didn't want
you to be scared, babe.
Because I care about you, girl.
- Bullshit. Bullshit.
You lying straight to my face.
- No, no, I'm not.
I love you, Maya.
- This is everything
that I was afraid of.
- Maya, my name's
not really Todd.
Oh, fuck. I guess
we doin' this.
- So you are Marty Simkowitz?
- No.
My real name is Isaiah
Foster. I'm not a doctor.
- Jesus, Todd!
- Isaiah.
- So has anything you
told me been true?
- Yes! Everything
about my brother.
All right, everything
about my dad dying.
I do like Skittles.
I think that Skittles thing
is, like, my core truth.
Not the moment for
jokes. I feel you.
Look, I came from nothing.
Hustling, scamming,
that's how I survived.
So when I saw you
in that club...
I told you I was a doctor.
- A children's
cancer doctor, Todd.
Isaiah.
- Isaiah.
- Oh, my God.
- Just another lie
in a lifetime of lies.
But the more time
we spent together,
the closer we got, all
I could think about
was how I could... how...
Look, I don't know...
- Tell me the truth?
- No.
No, that never really
crossed my mind.
How I could...
God, this is so humiliating...
Become Dr. Todd.
Not literally... I'm
too broke and too dumb
to be going to med school.
But I liked the way that
people looked at me.
I liked the way that
you looked at me.
And I was proud of myself for
the first time in my life.
And I know that's so fucked up,
'cause I'm just out here
playing make-believe.
Baby, I got a job.
I know you don't know me,
but that is wildly
out of character.
I'm a energy broker now.
And I don't know
what that is either,
but I make 48,000 a
year, plus benefits.
And I get
end-of-the-year bonuses,
and we got a company
retreat in March.
I get a polo with a logo on it.
It is so fuckin' boring,
but I'm so excited,
because being boring...
means I might get
to be with you.
I know you'll never
forgive Dr. Todd.
And you shouldn't. He's shady.
But I was really hoping...
girl, I'm praying you
give Isaiah a chance.
- Man, fuck her.
Boring-ass realtor motherfucker.
Marty!
And fuck that job, too.
Firing you just 'cause you
not who you said you was.
Who does that?
Marty!
- Marty, you don't understand!
- Marty!
- Go away, Troy!
- Home Depot is not gonna stop.
- Can we please just go
rob another bank, man?
Come on!
Come on, Marty!
- Rodney Lamonca
not gonna find us.
- Marty!
- Yeah, he is.
- Come on, man!
- Boy, you got some
big brass balls
calling me out of
the blue like this!
You know how much
trouble you caused me?
- With the cops?
- No, with my wife.
Ever since Katrina found out
that her son was murdered,
she's been a total buzzkill.
She stopped whitening her teeth.
She let her fillers go to shit.
It's like being married to
a fuckin' jack-o'-lantern.
I don't even enjoy
cheating on her anymore
because she deserves it!
So here's what I'm gonna do.
I'm gonna shoot you
in the fuckin' head.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa,
before you do that,
you might wanna hear me out.
- Oh, yeah? Why is that?
- 'Cause I'm about to
make you $20 million.
Go on.
- Three words:
Saw palmetto berries.
- What the fuck?
You gave him my idea?
- Oh, it's perfect!
I love my Domininers.
They're driven. They're hungry.
They're gonna change
the fuckin' world.
But these are some pencil
dick cum-dribblers.
If they weren't, they wouldn't
be spending 4,000 bucks
to watch Tyrese tell
'em that God has a plan.
- And most of these dudes
have prostate problems, bro.
We about to make bank.
- Okay, but it's not
gonna be easy for you.
It took us a year to
get to this point.
And there's hardly
any swampland left.
- So, yeah, about that.
Remember when I
called you last week?
Shit, what'd you do?
Your hands are clean.
- Not that clean. I
burned down the putt-putt.
- They never proved that.
- Lied to cops.
- Good. Cops suck.
- Dragged that kid's
body to the swamp.
- White boy with cornrows.
He had it coming.
- Fed it to a snake.
- That was awesome.
- Brock got shot 'cause of me.
- I don't even
know who Brock is.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
You were recording me?
- Yep.
And we got you on tape
confessing to the
murder of my wife's son.
- Could just say your son.
- He had none of
my blood! Shut up!
- So here's what's gonna happen.
You're gonna sign the farm over
to the Dominine Corporation.
And if you don't,
we're gonna play that
tape for the police.
Come on, bruh.
You don't want Vanessa to have
to visit her daddy in prison.
- Marty Simkowitz?
I'm from KB Debt
Consolidation Network.
You owe $8,000 to
Ashley Furniture.
- Fuckin' Ashley
Furniture, Marty?
- ♪ Ain't nobody dope as me ♪
♪ I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and
so clean, clean ♪
- ♪ Don't you think
I'm so sexy? ♪
♪ I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and
so clean, clean ♪
- ♪ Ain't nobody dope as me,
I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and
so clean, clean ♪
- ♪ I love when
you stare at me ♪
♪ I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and
so clean, clean ♪
♪ And we are the coolest
motherfunkers on the planet ♪
♪ And my, my, the
sky is falling ♪
♪ Ain't no need to
panic, but, ooh, ooh ♪
♪ I got a stick and
want yo' automatic ♪
♪ Ooh, ooh, compatible,
created in the attic ♪
♪ And we are the coolest
motherfunkers on the planet ♪
♪ And my, my, the
sky is falling ♪
♪ Ain't no need to
panic, but ooh, ooh ♪
♪ I got a stick and
want yo' automatic ♪
♪ Ooh, ooh, compatible,
created in the attic ♪
- ♪ Ain't nobody dope as me,
I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and
so clean, clean ♪
- ♪ Don't you think
I'm so sexy? ♪
♪ I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and
so clean, clean ♪
- ♪ Ain't nobody dope as me,
I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and
so clean, clean ♪
- ♪ I love when
you stare at me ♪
♪ I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and so
clean, clean, clean ♪
- ♪ Ain't nobody dope as me,
I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and so
clean, clean, clean ♪
- ♪ Don't you think
I'm so sexy? ♪
♪ I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and so
clean, clean, clean ♪
- ♪ Ain't nobody dope as me ♪
- Not a doctor.
- Shh.
---
- Things are good,
they really are.
We have a lot of fun together.
I mean, he's thoughtful
and romantic,
and he surprises me.
- I'm sensing a "but" coming.
- But he puts up walls.
Any time I try to ask him
about his day or his childhood,
he finds a way to
steer it back to me.
- And do you not enjoy that?
Some people like getting
to talk about themselves.
- I do.
I think it's really
sweet that he listens.
But I want to be closer.
His job is hard.
He treats kids with cancer.
- Oh, my goodness.
- And I get not wanting to
bring that home with him,
but I want him to know he can
talk to me about everything.
- And how do you feel
about this, Todd?
Do you feel like
there are things
you don't talk to Maya about?
- No, that's not me at all.
Ask anybody I've worked
with at the hospital
for the last 15 years.
Dr. Todd's an open book!
- You hated that.
- I didn't hate it, okay?
All right, I did
hate it a little bit,
but me being open
is me telling you that
I hate it, so I'm cured.
That Dr. Kristen is good.
Look, I know we haven't
been together that long,
but it's just, I
really like you.
I'm too old to be playing games.
- Girl, I'm not playing games.
You wanna know more about me?
- Yes.
- Okay, all right,
all right, here we go.
Um...
- Okay.
- Three.
- Three what?
- Number of times
I peed in the bed
after watching "Predator 2."
- Oh, my God, stop!
I don't wanna hear about
some movie you saw.
Get deep with me, Todd.
Okay, all right. I'm
building up to it.
Um... 11.
- 11 what?
- I was 11 years
old when I found out
Santa Claus wasn't real.
- Aww, so you're that
kinda cute, okay.
- See, I don't wanna
even tell you nine,
'cause I ain't want you
to think of me like this.
I want you to know
your man is tough.
- I don't need all your traumas.
I just wanna, like, meet
some of your work friends
and maybe see a picture
of you from childhood.
- I wanna see a
picture you, too,
and not some cheerleading
glamour shot.
I want those awkward years.
Talkin' 'bout one
big front tooth
and one little front tooth.
- Okay? I want
that chaos mouth.
- You're so stupid.
You're so stupid.
- Hi, Dr. Todd.
- Hey, how you doin', Duncan?
Yo, Dame!
Dame!
Oh, shit. Oh, shit!
- This motherfucker.
Oh, God. Oh, God.
Yeah!
- The fuck are you doing?
- I got a hover drone.
I'm on my Green Goblin shit.
- But why?
- Well, you know how I
been afraid of the road
ever since I got
hit by that truck?
Ain't no trucks in the sky.
Before you pass
judgment, man, peep it.
Gravity ain't got shit on me!
Oh, oh!
And it says that if I lose
a couple hundred pounds,
it get even higher.
- How much that shit cost?
- Like 10 grand.
- 10 grand?
- But my dude Bugs says
it's a good investment.
- You're getting
financial advice
from some dude named Bugs?
- Yeah. Bugs is smart.
He got in on Uber early.
He was the second driver.
- You can't keep
wasting money, Dame!
We're on the run
from Rodney Lamonca, remember?
- What?
All I heard was
"on the run," bro.
- Get your ass in the house!
Get your ass in the house!
This bag of cash is all we have
left, and we're running low.
So please, no more $10,000
Green Goblin drones.
Actually, I'ma be an asshole
and go ahead and say,
no more Green Goblin
drones at any price.
- I mean, if it's money we need,
we could always rob a bank.
Bugs says Phoenix a soft town.
- No, no, no, we
don't want to attract
any attention to ourselves.
No crimes, no scams.
No scams?
What about that scam that you
running on that Maya chick?
- That's real.
Maya's my girlfriend.
I went to therapy
with her today.
Ain't no scam worth that.
- But you didn't go to therapy.
Dr. Todd did.
- Okay, fine, yes, she
thinks I'm a doctor.
It's a stupid-ass lie that
I told when we first met
'cause I had three Jack and
Cokes on an empty stomach,
and I ain't think we'd
be falling in love.
Haven't you lied about
something before?
- Remember I told you
about that hover drone
costing 10 grand?
It was really 15.
- We takin' that
shit back right now.
Where Bugs live?
- Yo, Dame Train! What
can I do for you today?
Ooh, I just got some new 3D TVs.
You want a T-shirt cannon?
Bet you guys came here
in a boring-ass car.
How'd you like to go home
on a mini motorcycle?
- Oh, damn.
- Everybody's all
looking at you like,
"Hey, who's that?
What's their story?"
- No, no, we just wanna
keep a low profile.
- Oh, no, mini motorcycle
is low as shit.
It's like an inch
off the ground.
- I said no. Thanks.
- Wait, I know who this is.
Mr. Isaiah Clifton Foster.
Hey, nice to meet you, bro.
- What?
The fuck, Dame?
How this fool know my real name?
- I mean, he told me
about his divorce,
so I figured I had to open
up to him about something.
But don't worry, I ain't
give him no other details.
- Hey, how's stuff
with Craig, by the way?
I know there's a
lot of anger there,
but you only get
one brother, right?
- I'm sorry, Bugs, was it?
Could you please forget
everything you know about me?
- I see how it is.
You got trust issues.
Hey, that's why
I think it's good
that Maya is bringing
you to therapy.
- Oh, I swear to fuckin' God!
- Hey, I'm sorry. Now
look, now we're fighting.
Hey, what you say we
just start all over?
Would you like to do
a little bit of coke?
- No!
I just wanna return
this Green Goblin drone
you sold my boy.
- Seems like it'd
be pretty funny
to be on a drone all
coked up, but okay.
Anyway, I don't
have the 20 grand.
- 20 grand, Dame?
What happened to 15?
- But here's what
I can do for you.
I could take it back
for store credit.
Bugs Money.
- I want cash, not
fuckin' Bugs Money.
- Oh, well, if
it's cash you need,
I mean, Phoenix is a soft town.
- We're not
committing any crimes.
- Gonna have to do
something eventually.
That one little bag of
cash not gon' last forever.
- There's better ways
to get paid, Dame.
- Like what?
- I don't know, we...
We can get legit jobs.
- Oh, you're sick, man.
- This motherfucker.
- How you gonna get a job?
Dr. Todd can't pass
a background check,
and you don't want to be
paying taxes as Isaiah Foster,
'cause then your boy
Rodney Lamonca's gonna find you,
and since you're the only person
that knows that
he killed Noah...
- Stop knowing
shit about my life!
- Wait.
If you're willing to
use up your Bugs Money,
I might have a
solution for y'all.
So my boy works at the
Department of Records.
He issues the
death certificates.
But sometimes he, um...
"forgets" to issue the
death certificates.
- You talking for real forgets
or crime guy forgets?
- You know I'm
talking crime guy.
- Nice.
- Yeah, so if someone dies,
and they ain't got no family,
my guy sells their info
to the highest bidder.
- So this is a new identity.
- Social Security
number, birth date,
list of previous residences,
everything you need to
become a upstanding citizen.
♪ Won't nobody know it's you ♪
♪ It's just so fresh and clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and
so clean, clean ♪
- ♪ You're becoming
someone new ♪
both: ♪ It's just
so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and
so clean, clean ♪
- So I'm...
- I'm like, I'm like,
what's even going on right now?
I am now...
Marty Simkowitz?
- Damn.
Hey, that feels like it's
always been your name.
- You think people really
gon' buy this shit?
- They buy me as a doctor.
You've seen the neighbors.
I get, like, 20 "Hi,
Dr. Todds" a day.
- Yeah, but we in Phoenix.
Those "Hi, Dr. Todds," that's
not them being friendly.
That's, "Hi, I'm watching
your Black ass, Dr. Todd."
- I don't know what
he's going on about.
I mean, like, there's
hella Black people
in Arizona, right?
There's you guys. Um...
Damn. Oh, there's, like, a
bunch of the Phoenix Suns.
Y'all are thriving up in here!
- Okay, you guarantee
this is gonna work?
You'll pay me back if I
can't get a job with this,
and not fuckin' Bugs Money.
- Hey, okay, let's calm down.
There is no need to
besmirch Bugs Money.
- Mm-hmm.
- But yes, I guarantee.
It's all gonna turn out
fine, Mr. Simkowitz.
- Mr. Simkowitz is my dad.
Call me Marty.
- Marty.
Look, I'm in love with you.
I was blown away
by your interview.
I mean, the passion that you
have for energy brokering.
- What can I say?
It's what I live for.
The thrill of...
brokering energy.
- I would have hired you on
the spot, but we have HR,
and they make us do these full
criminal background checks.
And yours came back,
and I do have one question.
When can you start?
You aced it, bro!
Fuckin' Simkowitz!
- Hey, Marty.
- Marty.
Fuckin' Marty!
- Looks like that
forehead hit puberty...
Oh, really?
- Before the rest
of your body did.
You look like a little
mini Tommy from "Martin."
- That's 'cause my brother
was a bad photographer.
He didn't know how
to work them angles.
- Wait, you have a brother?
- Yep.
- Okay, anything else
you wanna share about him
besides he took a bad
photo of you 30 years ago?
- Sorry I didn't
mention it earlier,
but we kinda had a little
bit of a rough patch.
But I'm open now, so go ahead.
What you wanna know about Craig?
- Craig. Okay.
So where does Craig live?
- Florida.
- Older or younger?
- Older.
- And what does he do?
- He's a farmer,
which sounds weird.
He grows saw palmetto berries.
They put 'em in a lot of
men's health supplements.
It's a billion-dollar industry.
It's actually pretty smart.
- So what happened?
Why the rough patch?
- Guess I always expect
him to have my back,
and one day he didn't.
But I'm sure he's feeling
really bad about it.
He calls me every day,
leaving voice mails
like a psycho.
- Why don't you pick up?
What, you're afraid
he's gonna say something
you don't want to hear?
- All right.
That's enough, Dr. Kristen.
- Okay, I'ma talk to
him when I'm ready.
- Aww, well, I'm glad
you shared that with me.
Okay, you ready?
- Mm-hmm.
- This is my picture.
It's from fourth grade.
And don't ask me why I
look like a yacht captain.
Cute.
Todd.
Todd.
- Huh?
Yeah, yeah. I'm
sorry, I was just...
Let's see Captain Maya, okay?
- Mm-hmm.
- Ears built like
a African drum.
I know you not talking.
- That forehead was
like, "Damn, Gina!"
Like, it's out
there.
Whatever.
So you coming over tonight?
- Huh?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, yeah.
You know, I would, but I got
a surgery in the morning,
and I kinda wanna
be fresh for it.
- Well, give me a kiss.
- Whatever Rodney
Lamonca's paying you,
I could pay you more!
- Who the fuck is
Rodney Lamonca?
- The guy you're working for.
- No, I work for American
West Receivables.
I'm a debt collector.
And you owe us
$73,000, Mr. Simkowitz.
- Okay, I'm sorry, man,
but you got the wrong guy.
- I've got the right guy, Marty.
348 South Cactus Shadow Lane.
Oh, congrats on the
new job, by the way.
- Look, I'm telling you, man...
- You know what?
Did you really think
that we were gonna
stop looking for you?
Did you really think that
RadioShack would forget?
- RadioShack?
Oh, come on, man, RadioShack
went out of business.
- But debts never die, Marty.
American West bought
up your account,
which means you owe us now.
73,000 large.
- Do I look like a
Marty Simkowitz to you?
My name's Todd.
- No, no, you don't
get to do that, Marty.
You don't just snap your fingers
and become someone else.
You made a mistake.
There have to be consequences.
That's how the past works.
It sticks with you.
Hmm. 9:00.
Saved by the bell.
See you soon, Marty.
- Hi, Dr. Todd.
- Hey, yo, Dame!
Oh. Yeah.
- Aw, what the fuck?
Dame, the hell are you doing?
Zay?
It's a light therapy
mask. Bugs sold it to me.
He says it harnesses the
awesome powers of lasers
to refresh your complexion.
This desert been
drying my ass out, man.
- Why you banging
around the bathroom?
- Oh, that's because I
couldn't find the door handle,
you know, 'cause all
I see is red shit.
- Then take off
the mask, dumbass!
- Uh-uh. No.
They say you have to leave
this thing on for 60 minutes.
It'll beep when it's done.
Oh, there it is.
How do I look?
I look younger?
- You look naked.
- That's 'cause I also bought
a robot that sucks your dick.
- Stop buying shit from Bugs,
and lock the front
door next time.
What the fuck?
Huh?
Coming!
Who the fuck are you?
- Hello, Mr. Simkowitz.
I'm with New Horizon
Collection Services,
and you owe $18,000
to Federal Health Conglomerated.
- Wait, this isn't
about RadioShack?
- Hey there, Marty.
So glad to finally
put a face to a name.
I'm from Baseline
Recovery Associates.
Can I come in?
- No.
- Can I come in?
- What y'all can both do is
get the fuck off my porch.
I'm not having
strangers in my house.
I'm not a
stranger. We're old friends.
- We are not fuckin' friends!
- Marty.
- Marty.
- Marty.
- Mr. Simkowitz.
- Marty.
- Marty!
- Marty, Marty, you
can't run from this.
- Marty!
- Mr. Simkowitz.
Open up the door!
- Marty...
- Yo, Zay, man, what
the fuck is going on?
- We gotta go find Bugs, man.
There's something wrong
with identity he sold me.
Marty, hey.
- Oh, shit, they everywhere.
- Marty!
- I mean, if somebody
ain't get rid
of that Green
Goblin drone we had,
we could just fly up out this...
- Man, get dressed!
We'll go out the back, fool.
- Hi, Dr. Todd.
- Duncan!
What's up, my man?
- I don't know if you saw,
but you have quite
a few visitors.
- Yes, Duncan.
Thank you, Duncan.
What kinda fuckin'
name is Bugs, anyway?
Fuckin' cartoon
rabbit motherfucker!
Yo, Bugs!
- Oh, shit.
So that's why I got such a
good deal on the SuckBot.
Going out of business sale.
- What the hell?
"Dear Marty, sorry
about all this.
"I wish I could explain
this to you in person.
"By the time you
get this letter,
I'll be hundreds
of miles away."
- Shit.
I timed this out
wrong. Damn it.
- What's up, Bugs?
It's all in the letter.
I spent a lot of
time on it, too.
Actually some rather beautiful
turns of phrase in there.
But you know what? I'm
just gonna step outside.
That way, you don't have
to read in front of me,
make us both feel
self-conscious.
- Not another fucking step.
Look, I understand how
you're feeling right now.
If you read the
letter, you'd know
that I bought Marty Simkowitz's
identity a year ago,
and I assumed it was
clean, just like you did.
- You told me it was clean.
I didn't assume anything.
- I mean, you assumed I
was telling you the truth.
He got
you with that, Z.
- It turns out this identity's
changed hands dozens of times.
But the debt collectors
just keep on comin'.
- I don't look like you,
and I definitely don't
look like a Simkowitz.
- They don't care.
The debt gets sold and
sold and sold again.
Corporations don't stop
to ask what we look like.
We're not even people to them.
We're just profits and losses.
Red ink and black.
To them, we're just
numbers on a page.
- That's some good shit, bro.
- It's from the letter.
- So what am I supposed to do?
- Find some other
sucker to pass it on to.
Until then, you gotta hide.
The debt collectors
can come to your house,
but they can't come inside
unless you let them in.
That's why I work from home.
And they can't contact
you before 8:00 a.m.
or after 9:00 p.m.
- I don't wanna know your
dumbass vampire rules.
You're gonna take
this identity back
like you promised me.
I'm done being...
- Marty Simkowitz.
I'm from Castle
Southwest Financial.
You owe $8,000 to
Bally Total Fitness.
- Don't look at me.
Guy you wanna talk
to is right over...
Motherfucker, where'd he go?
You didn't even
get his real name?
You're just out here
calling a grown man Bugs?
Shit,
stop calling me.
- You getting way too
worked up about this, bro.
They can't make you
pay. You ain't Marty.
What you think, they
gonna chase you around
and ruin your
relationship with Maya?
- Yes! That's what
I'm scared of.
Shit.
I see that now.
This is a big deal, man.
- Ah, fuck! Maya.
I'm supposed to
meet her for lunch.
Shit.
Where are my scrubs?
- Hi, Dr. Todd.
- Yes, Duncan. Hello,
Duncan, once again!
- So my sister's gonna ask
me, what do I think of her ex.
- Mm-hmm.
- And I'm like,
"He's an immature teenage boy
trapped in a
40-year-old man's body."
- Word?
- And then she says,
"Oh, we're getting
back together."
And I'm like, "Wow, you gonna
go back to that fuckboy?"
Like, I knew it was a setup.
She was just asking me
that, knowing she knows
that I don't even like him.
Stupid.
- Yeah, fuck her.
- My sister?
- Uh, I wasn't even listening.
How about we... How
about we get out of here?
- What is that supposed to mean?
I don't wanna make
out in your car.
Your seats don't
go back far enough.
- No, babe, like, we
should take a trip.
Maybe go out to the desert,
get a hotel, just the two of us.
- Okay, look at you
being all impulsive.
Okay, so when were you thinking?
'Cause next weekend
I have that...
- I think we should
go right now.
- Right now? Right now?
Babe, it's Tuesday.
- Well, I don't have any
more surgeries for the rest
of the week, and you can get
Caleb to do your showings.
Let him be useful for once.
- You just don't like
Caleb 'cause he's tall.
- No, I don't like Caleb
'cause you think he's tall.
6'1" is unremarkable.
- All right, let's go.
But I gotta go by the office
and talk to Tall Caleb
and then pack.
I'll get you at 6:00.
- Okay.
Or 5:00.
Wanna do 5:00? Let's do 5:00.
5:00's good.
This is about to be so much fun.
Ugh, my phone is about to die,
and I forgot to bring a charger.
Do you have one?
- What?
Nah, nah, nah.
Left at the crib.
- Oh, we're gonna
have to use your phone
for directions then.
- My phone?
- Yeah.
- It's off right now.
- And you can't turn it back on?
- Well, I'm trying
to be in the moment,
stay present with you, but...
Somebody's popular.
- Yeah, hospital's on my nuts.
You're so stupid.
What do we got?
Beet chips. Prickly
pear hard candies.
Okay, this isn't normal
bougie. This is stupid bougie.
Mm-hmm.
- Who could that be?
- Hello?
- I wish you told me you were
planning a trip,
Mr. Simkowitz.
- Nah, we're good.
- How's the room?
Are you enjoying the
prickly pear hard candy?
- Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
Thank you so much.
Just the front desk
checking to see
if we got everything we need.
- Okay, cool.
So you wanna go downstairs,
grab some drinks,
check out the hot tub?
- Or we just go to the bedroom.
Go to sleep. Call it a night.
It's 7:40.
- They say the first
day of the vacation,
you're supposed to just stay in.
- But aren't we
leaving tomorrow?
- You know what? You
right. You right.
I'm sorry, baby,
for being weird.
- Mm-hmm.
- My penis smells from
driving, so I think
I should just go
take a quick shower.
Just give me a quick
second, all right?
I'll be right back.
- Lands himself
locked up in jail.
- Baby, that was invigorating.
I needed that. What you up to?
- Sitting here,
watching Mario Lopez
describe the plot
of "Despicable Me 3"
on loop for an hour and a half.
- Gru is back!
- Wow, have I been in the shower
for an hour and a half?
I'm gonna make it up to you
with a glass of champagne.
- No, champagne's
not gonna do it.
- Wine?
- No!
- Henny?
- Don't play with me.
- Tequila?
- I want a margarita so big,
they're gonna have to
mix it in a trash can.
- Okay, you know what? One
trasharita for my girl.
- Lands himself locked up...
- Oh, my God.
- Now, when you say "trash can,"
are you thinking one of those
little guys under a desk,
or, like, one of those...
Those big dented metal ones?
- Yeah, there you go.
Oscar the Grouch style.
- Hello, Marty.
- Why is this man
calling you Marty?
- I don't know,
babe. I have no idea
why this guy would even be
speaking to us after 9:00 p.m.
- Oh, no. Jeez, you're
right. It is after 9:00.
I'm just gonna, uh, face
zero fucking consequences.
- Todd!
- There are rules against this.
- Todd.
- It's the law.
- Then file a complaint
with the government.
I look forward to seeing
you at my online hearing
in 18 months.
- Todd, what is going on?
- Your boyfriend is
a liar and a crook.
- What?
- No, no, I'm not.
- His name is not even Todd.
It's Marty Simkowitz,
and he owes $73,000
to RadioShack!
- Hey. Are you Troy Chubner?
- I don't know, Todd, are you?
- What? No.
- I'm Troy Chubner.
- I'm a debt collector
with Keystone Associates.
You owe $12,000 to Home
Depot, Mr. Chubner.
- No, no.
- Yes!
- No.
- Yes!
- No, I already spoke to someone
at Keystone about this.
Rachel, she said she
was gonna send me
a payment plan in the mail.
- Rachel quit.
- What the fuck is going on?
- Uh, listen, I'm a
debt collector too,
so I know that everybody
always tells you
that they're about to get
you your money, but I am.
I'm about to get you your money.
This guy is really
close to paying.
Tell him.
- No, I'm not.
- Yes, he is.
- What the fuck is going on?
Wow, I'm leaving, Todd.
- Baby. Baby. Maya.
- This is ridiculous.
- You think I know this dude?
Look at the motherfucker.
- Marty, give me a hand.
- Get off me, man!
- Come on, we're talking...
- Get off of me, man!
- Come on, he's...
Look, he's totally freaked out.
All right, here's the thing.
Home Depot, they
totally messed up.
They sold me a wicker
trash can hideaway,
but raccoons kept
getting into it.
The company even admitted that
the product was defective.
Let me pull up the email.
It's right here. I got
it right here somewhere.
- I know where
you live, Chubner!
- Just wait for me.
I'll be right back.
I swear to God, right back.
- Maya!
- I knew it was too
good to be fuckin' true.
- Maya, wait! Maya!
- Oh, every fuckin' time.
- Girl...
- Every time...
- Maya!
- I open myself up.
- Maya, I'm sorry.
This lunatic thinks
I'm somebody named
Marty Simkowitz.
He came to the hospital.
He's been following me for days.
- Is that why you wanted
to get out of town?
Why didn't you just say that?
- 'Cause I didn't want
you to be scared, babe.
Because I care about you, girl.
- Bullshit. Bullshit.
You lying straight to my face.
- No, no, I'm not.
I love you, Maya.
- This is everything
that I was afraid of.
- Maya, my name's
not really Todd.
Oh, fuck. I guess
we doin' this.
- So you are Marty Simkowitz?
- No.
My real name is Isaiah
Foster. I'm not a doctor.
- Jesus, Todd!
- Isaiah.
- So has anything you
told me been true?
- Yes! Everything
about my brother.
All right, everything
about my dad dying.
I do like Skittles.
I think that Skittles thing
is, like, my core truth.
Not the moment for
jokes. I feel you.
Look, I came from nothing.
Hustling, scamming,
that's how I survived.
So when I saw you
in that club...
I told you I was a doctor.
- A children's
cancer doctor, Todd.
Isaiah.
- Isaiah.
- Oh, my God.
- Just another lie
in a lifetime of lies.
But the more time
we spent together,
the closer we got, all
I could think about
was how I could... how...
Look, I don't know...
- Tell me the truth?
- No.
No, that never really
crossed my mind.
How I could...
God, this is so humiliating...
Become Dr. Todd.
Not literally... I'm
too broke and too dumb
to be going to med school.
But I liked the way that
people looked at me.
I liked the way that
you looked at me.
And I was proud of myself for
the first time in my life.
And I know that's so fucked up,
'cause I'm just out here
playing make-believe.
Baby, I got a job.
I know you don't know me,
but that is wildly
out of character.
I'm a energy broker now.
And I don't know
what that is either,
but I make 48,000 a
year, plus benefits.
And I get
end-of-the-year bonuses,
and we got a company
retreat in March.
I get a polo with a logo on it.
It is so fuckin' boring,
but I'm so excited,
because being boring...
means I might get
to be with you.
I know you'll never
forgive Dr. Todd.
And you shouldn't. He's shady.
But I was really hoping...
girl, I'm praying you
give Isaiah a chance.
- Man, fuck her.
Boring-ass realtor motherfucker.
Marty!
And fuck that job, too.
Firing you just 'cause you
not who you said you was.
Who does that?
Marty!
- Marty, you don't understand!
- Marty!
- Go away, Troy!
- Home Depot is not gonna stop.
- Can we please just go
rob another bank, man?
Come on!
Come on, Marty!
- Rodney Lamonca
not gonna find us.
- Marty!
- Yeah, he is.
- Come on, man!
- Boy, you got some
big brass balls
calling me out of
the blue like this!
You know how much
trouble you caused me?
- With the cops?
- No, with my wife.
Ever since Katrina found out
that her son was murdered,
she's been a total buzzkill.
She stopped whitening her teeth.
She let her fillers go to shit.
It's like being married to
a fuckin' jack-o'-lantern.
I don't even enjoy
cheating on her anymore
because she deserves it!
So here's what I'm gonna do.
I'm gonna shoot you
in the fuckin' head.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa,
before you do that,
you might wanna hear me out.
- Oh, yeah? Why is that?
- 'Cause I'm about to
make you $20 million.
Go on.
- Three words:
Saw palmetto berries.
- What the fuck?
You gave him my idea?
- Oh, it's perfect!
I love my Domininers.
They're driven. They're hungry.
They're gonna change
the fuckin' world.
But these are some pencil
dick cum-dribblers.
If they weren't, they wouldn't
be spending 4,000 bucks
to watch Tyrese tell
'em that God has a plan.
- And most of these dudes
have prostate problems, bro.
We about to make bank.
- Okay, but it's not
gonna be easy for you.
It took us a year to
get to this point.
And there's hardly
any swampland left.
- So, yeah, about that.
Remember when I
called you last week?
Shit, what'd you do?
Your hands are clean.
- Not that clean. I
burned down the putt-putt.
- They never proved that.
- Lied to cops.
- Good. Cops suck.
- Dragged that kid's
body to the swamp.
- White boy with cornrows.
He had it coming.
- Fed it to a snake.
- That was awesome.
- Brock got shot 'cause of me.
- I don't even
know who Brock is.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
You were recording me?
- Yep.
And we got you on tape
confessing to the
murder of my wife's son.
- Could just say your son.
- He had none of
my blood! Shut up!
- So here's what's gonna happen.
You're gonna sign the farm over
to the Dominine Corporation.
And if you don't,
we're gonna play that
tape for the police.
Come on, bruh.
You don't want Vanessa to have
to visit her daddy in prison.
- Marty Simkowitz?
I'm from KB Debt
Consolidation Network.
You owe $8,000 to
Ashley Furniture.
- Fuckin' Ashley
Furniture, Marty?
- ♪ Ain't nobody dope as me ♪
♪ I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and
so clean, clean ♪
- ♪ Don't you think
I'm so sexy? ♪
♪ I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and
so clean, clean ♪
- ♪ Ain't nobody dope as me,
I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and
so clean, clean ♪
- ♪ I love when
you stare at me ♪
♪ I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and
so clean, clean ♪
♪ And we are the coolest
motherfunkers on the planet ♪
♪ And my, my, the
sky is falling ♪
♪ Ain't no need to
panic, but, ooh, ooh ♪
♪ I got a stick and
want yo' automatic ♪
♪ Ooh, ooh, compatible,
created in the attic ♪
♪ And we are the coolest
motherfunkers on the planet ♪
♪ And my, my, the
sky is falling ♪
♪ Ain't no need to
panic, but ooh, ooh ♪
♪ I got a stick and
want yo' automatic ♪
♪ Ooh, ooh, compatible,
created in the attic ♪
- ♪ Ain't nobody dope as me,
I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and
so clean, clean ♪
- ♪ Don't you think
I'm so sexy? ♪
♪ I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and
so clean, clean ♪
- ♪ Ain't nobody dope as me,
I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and
so clean, clean ♪
- ♪ I love when
you stare at me ♪
♪ I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and so
clean, clean, clean ♪
- ♪ Ain't nobody dope as me,
I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and so
clean, clean, clean ♪
- ♪ Don't you think
I'm so sexy? ♪
♪ I'm just so fresh, so clean ♪
- ♪ So fresh and so
clean, clean, clean ♪
- ♪ Ain't nobody dope as me ♪
- Not a doctor.
- Shh.