Kick Buttowski: Suburban Daredevil (2010–2012): Season 1, Episode 12 - For the Love of Gunther/Father from the Truth - full transcript
In "For the Love of Gunther," Gunther falls in love with Kick's biggest fan Wacky Jackie just as Kick is preparing a jump at Widowmaker's Peak. To distract Jackie's affections from him, Kick tries to make Gunther act just like him, which proves to be more successful than he expects when Gunther vows to replace Kick at the stunt. In "Father from the Truth," Kick fears his father might embarrass when he brings him to his school's "Bring Your Dad to School Day," so he tries to bring a substitute that he thinks will meet his standards of "extreme."
♪♪ [theme]
♪ kick, kick ♪
♪ kick, kick, kick ♪
♪ kick buttowski ♪
♪ kick ♪
♪ kick ♪
♪ kick buttowski ♪
♪ kick, kick ♪
♪ kick, kick ♪
♪ kick buttowski ♪
♪ kick, kick ♪
♪ kick, kick ♪
♪ kick ♪
♪ kick ♪
♪ kick buttowski ♪
♪ kick buttowski ♪
[crash]
[screaming]
[screaming continues]
[squeak]
Yeah! Great test run, kick.
[crash] [cat yowls]
Good thing that was the test
dummy, huh, kick?
[gasps]
[clatter]
I hear pain! [screams]
Oh, yes! Yes!
Show me the scrapes.
Show... show me it.
Okay. Good. Yes!
Even better than the
famous rug burn of '08.
This one's going on the fridge.
Oh, jackie!
Your lingonberry pie is ready!
Lingonberry pie? My favorite!
Your... your favorite?
And your viking helmet of
the month just arrived.
Finally.
And i just polished your clogs.
[yodeling]
[thumping]
Aw. Ah.
So what was today's big stunt for
anyway, huh? [grunting]
I'm preparing for my eventual
descent down widowma...
Widomaker's pea-ea-ea-ea-ea-eak?
Yeah.
You must've snuck into my
house and ready my diary,
And now you know it's
been my greatest dream
To marry the first man who
conquers widowmaker's peak.
If you do eat it on
widowmaker's peak,
That would make me your widow!
Get it? Widowmaker's peak!
[squelch] ew. Roadkill.
♪♪ [humming tango music]
[shudders]
[shuddering laugh]
What's up, gunther?
You never drool this much.
Gunther? Are you listening?
Gunther! [buzzing]
Oh.
Sorry, kick, but i'm in love.
Hah! Love.
Oh. You're serious.
Well, then, who are you in...
uhh... with?
Well, it's...
[jackie] ki-i-i-i-ick!
My mother doesn't
approve of you!
Forbidden love.
[footsteps running]
She's never gonna want me.
She? Oh, right. The girl.
Wow. You've got it bad, huh?
Yes! So bad!
You know what?
I'm gonna help you
Get this dream girl. [slurping]
So who is she?
Well, she was just standing
outside that window.
Huh?
The only person that could be
Is wacky jackie, and...
[chuckling]
No! No. Come on. Not her.
Yes.
But she's wacky!
Only to you because
you don't love her.
But if jackie was
obsessed with me
The way she is with you,
Then she'd be out of
your hair and into mine,
Assuming that you have hair.
So you're saying that if we get
her to become obsessed with you,
Then she'll leave me alone,
All while making your
dreams come true.
But she doesn't even notice
me, kick.
Then getting you noticed
is step number 1.
There's nothing
jackie loves more
Than extreme daredevils,
So i'll show you how to be one.
I just rode over here on sewage.
Is that extreme enough?
Okay, gunther,
you need to master
The three rules of keeping
a daredevil attitude.
Rule 1: Speech.
Say something you'd
like to tell jackie.
"Dearest jackie,
"your face is like an
apple, ripe to the touch.
You make my heart
beat within my womb."
Enough.
If you need at least five words
To convey something,
use two instead.
Simplify, gunther. Simplify.
Rule 2: Focus.
Here. Follow the stick.
Excellent. How do you feel?
Ooh, i'm feeling really
nice and focused.
Ah-ah-ah-ah.
Feeling focused.
Third... most important...
reason.
Never, ever,
ever listen to reason.
Gunther, what are you doing?
Quiet, kick.
I'm listening to reason.
If you can master
these three rules,
You're on your way to
being an extreme daredevil.
Any questions?
"Dearest jackie, your face is
like an apple, ripe to the touch."
Come on, gunther, simplify.
Fart.
Fart, fart.
Hello? Hello? Is anyone there?
[sniffles]
She didn't even notice me.
She didn't notice you
Because you still
don't look the part.
Look the part.
Something tells me this
looks better on you.
In that outfit,
Ladies won't be able
to tell the difference.
Ki-i-i-i-ick!
Lookit!
Ugh! She's all yours.
I made it with
your old bandages.
I didn't have enough
for the last letter,
But maybe you can
make me some more
When you go down
widowmaker's peak!
Kick? Hmm? No one's there.
Even with this hot ensemble,
she didn't notice me.
What am i doing wrong?
Did you keep a steely gaze
when she looked at you?
No, kick. Don't you get it?
Jackie loves people
For the extremely cool
things that they can do,
And that's why i
need to do this.
Do what?
I'm going down widowmaker's peak.
Hah! Gunther, that's insane.
Even i'm not ready
for widowmaker's peak.
That's why i have to do it.
I have to outdo the best.
Come on, gunther.
Listen to reason.
Oh!
[kick] never listen to reason.
Listen to reason. Gotcha.
Good, gunther, 'cause this time, i...
[door closes]
Aw, biscuits.
Come one, come all!
Actually, just jackie.
'Cause gunther is about
to be the first man
To conquer widowmaker's peak!
Oh, kick,
you're such a good kisser.
I repeat, widowmaker's peak!
Widowmaker's peak?
[crow cawing]
Those girls gonna go in that box
And go down the
hill and get hurt.
Gunther, you can't do this!
Do you want to die?
No. I want to live...
Till it hurts. [grunting]
Gunther,
i won't let you do this.
You're gonna get hurt.
I have to do this.
I gotta get the girl.
No girl is gonna
come between us.
And getting rid of jackie
Isn't worth losing
my best friend.
Come on, buddy.
We'll find another way.
Leave me alone!
Get out of the car.
Go away!
You gotta let me do this!
I said get out! I said go away.
Your breath smells
like stratosphere.
That's not my breath.
That's the wind. Wind?
[straining]
Gunther,
you're perfectly balanced.
Don't move.
Don't even make a sound.
Why?
[screaming]
[screaming continues]
[yells]
[screaming continues]
[grunting]
[screaming continues]
[bear growling]
[growling continues]
[bear grunting]
[kick yelling]
[grunts]
Gunther, you're the first one
to conquer widowmaker's peak?
[cheering]
I am the first one! Hmm.
[grunts]
[gasping]
I never realized
You've been such a
daredevil all this time,
Hiding behind the
glory of your friend.
Marry me. I do.
Congratulations, gunther.
Wow. You didn't tell me how
easy this stuff was, kick.
Quiet, you big-talking man.
Ew. Roadkill.
Way to go, gunther. [cheering]
You got the girl,
and i got rid of the girl.
I just love a man who can
take a hit from a bear.
I'm gonna make a blog
And start following
you all around.
Uh...
[bell ringing] [teacher] all
right, students. Quiet down.
Monday is a very special day.
Can anyone tell me
what that might be?
Ooh, ooh!
Spaghetti and meatballs day?
Mmm. Well, there's that.
But it's also bring
your dad to school day.
[cheering]
It's my dad's weekend
to get his back shaved,
So he'll be all nice
and smooth for monday.
Eww! Eww!
[groans]
What's the matter, buttowski?
Not excited to bring
your dad to school?
Oh, i'm totally jumping
up and down on the inside.
Hah! I bet that's because
Your dad is lame.
Ooh! Ooh!
Not a chance, mouth.
My dad is the coolest.
He's the x in extreme
And the extreme
in extremely cool.
When the heavens needed
a mold for awesome,
They used my dad.
Ohh! Ohh!
And then he broke
that very mold.
Uh, kick, do you have a different
dad that i don't know about?
No way, gunther.
My dad is totally...
You boys keep it down.
I'm building card castles.
Lame.
What are you gonna do?
I've got the weekend
to make him awesome.
How hard could that be?
Whoo-hoo!
Double-decker!
Okay, so why are we doing this?
I'll, uh,
give you the details later.
As long as i get to do
groovy things with my son.
Shouldn't you start
with something smaller?
No time for small. Okay, dad.
Get on the board.
And remember,
live till it hurts.
Live till it hurts!
Aah!
[crash] [grunts]
Oh, it hurts.
It hurts.
[high-pitched voice] and hurts.
Whoa! [yelling]
Ahh! This just might work.
[crash]
Yep. Still hurts.
Or not.
[grunts]
I love doing this stuff with
you, son,
But what's all this for again?
Nothing, dad.
Never mind.
What am i gonna do?
Everyone's expecting me to bring
my cool dad to school on monday.
Aw, don't worry about it.
Your dad will be fine.
Oh, sure. You can say that.
Look at your cool dad.
What too cold?
[teeth chattering]
There! Is hot enough for you?
[screaming]
Yep. He's pretty cool.
Would it have been too much
to ask to have a cool dad like
Ninja dad,
Commando dad,
Or rock star dad?
Instead,
all i get is boring dad.
Well, what if your dad
pretended to be cool?
Nah.
Or, i could pretend
to have a cooler dad.
Oh, and i'll pretend
That i totally support this.
We've brought you
here today to audition
For a very extreme
and super-cool role.
So to begin, what would you do
If you were kick's dad?
[all screaming]
[screeching]
Coming through.
[yells]
[tires screeching]
Admittedly,
i saw that one coming.
Come on, gunther.
There's gotta be
Someone out there who
could play my dad.
Someone as smart
and awesome as me.
[bell dings]
Hoo-hoo. Classic.
Wade.
Hey, hey, it's danger
dude and his norse amigo.
Whatcha doing?
Just nuking a
microwavable burrito,
Big daddy of the
frozen snack world.
[slurping]
[grunting]
Brain burn!
Ha-ha!
Diminished.
I want a brain burn.
Dare to dream, norse amigo.
Dare to dream.
Now, how can the wade
be of assistance?
What would you do
if you were my dad?
I don't even know your
mom's favorite color.
No. It's bring your dad
to school day tomorrow,
And i'm making you my dad.
Okey-doke. I'm in.
What do i gotta do?
Just act cool.
[gunther] aghh! Brain burn!
Hey, magnus.
Just picking up a to-go order.
Hello, harry.
I'll be right with you.
Quick, finish first pass.
We have customer.
♪♪ [whistling]
[inhales deeply] mmm.
Viking chorizo.
You looking forward to monday?
Monday? Oh, of course.
I mean, who doesn't love
mondays, right?
What's monday?
It's take father to school day.
Kick no invite?
Hmm? No...
Uh, i'm sure he just forgot.
I'll just surprise
him at school.
Better get in a
little more practice.
[yells]
[bell ringing] [teacher] all
right, class.
Welcome to bring your
dad to school day.
Let's start with kendall.
This is my daddy.
He has the most interesting job.
Tell them what you do, daddy.
Well, i'm an actuary.
An actuary is a
business professional
Dealing in the financial
impact of risk and uncertainty.
Actuaries have a
deep understanding
Of financial security systems,
With a focus on
their complexity,
Their mathematics,
and their mechanisms.
Actuaries evaluate the
likelihood of events
And quantify the
contingent outcomes
In order to minimize losses,
Both emotional and financial.
[all snoring] [kendall
clears throat]
[all gasp]
Mm-hmm. Gunther magnuson.
This is my dad magnus.
He and my mom run the
battlesnax restaurant.
Hello, children.
Bookish boy in front.
Uh, why are you wearing a skirt?
It's not skirt!
It's warrior kilt!
I viking! I wear armor!
I challenge you to fight me!
Mmm. That good.
Maybe i put it on menu.
That's my pop.
[applause] mmm.
Next up, mouth...
Uh, christopher.
Listen up, slackers.
My dad is the cool second
assistant security guard
At the mellowbrook mall.
Prepare to be impressed.
Who ya gonna call
When you got trouble
in your mall?
Boo-yah!
Ooh! Ooh!
Who's the coolest dad?
Buttowski. Who? Buttowski.
[teacher] next
up, mr. Buttowski.
Ha. Just in time.
Allow me to introduce... My dad,
The coolest dad ever.
Uh, hello, dudes and dudettes.
"My name is," uh, "kick's dad,
And i'm the most awesome
dad in the universe."
That's right. And is there
anyone more awesome than you,
My real dad?
Real dad?
"The only person
more awesome than me
Is point to kick."
Uh-oh. Uh, "is my real son
Kick."
"let me tell you a little
bit about my awesome life."
There i was,
Surrounded on all sides
by ninja assassins,
So i was... [karate yells]
[yells continue] [gasping]
What?
The chopper swooped
in and picked me up,
And soon we're flying
over the jungle canopy,
But the l.Z.
Was hot, and we couldn't land,
So i had to jump.
Yaah! [kids scream]
The enemy was hot on my tail,
so i was all... [grunts]
[imitating machine gun firing]
And i made it just in time
for my rock and roll concert.
♪♪ [imitating guitar]
And that was all this morning.
Wow! Wow!
I had no idea.
Kick is embarrassed
to be my son.
♪♪ [imitating guitar]
[yells]
Did not see that coming.
[all] wade?
Wade? Total shocker.
Ha! That's not your real dad!
I knew your dad was lame.
[laughing] [bell ringing]
[laughing continues]
I screwed up, gunther.
I think you would've been better
off bringing your real dad.
I know.
He may not be awesome or extreme,
But i couldn't ask
for a better dad.
Plus, he would've
kept his moustache on.
Look on the bright side, kick.
What?
It's spaghetti
and meatballs day!
Hmm.
Time to get awesome.
Next.
[kids whooping]
Yeah, dad! Go!
[cheering]
Coolest dad ever.
Well, well, well.
Looks like my dad's the winner.
It really doesn't matter, mouth.
That's 'cause your
dad's a no-show.
Maybe he saved
the best for last.
Dad, it's okay. You don't have...
don't worry. I've been practicing.
[yells]
[yelling]
Whoa! Something cooler! Yeah!
Jeezo pizza.
Did i make a mess of everything?
No, dad.
I made a mess of everything.
You are awesome.
But the stunt failed.
Not because of the stunt.
Because you did it for me.
Thanks. Anytime, son.
And next time, just ask me.
I might surprise you.
Have i died and gone to
spaghetti and meatball heaven?
Awesome! Cool!
[kids cheering]
So, i'd love to try
that ramp again.
How about we build a
card castle instead?
Are you sure?
I kind of like that motto...
Live till it... aah!
Stepped on noodles!
[crash] ow! It hurts.
I'll have the special.
[clatter]
You want fries with that?
♪ kick, kick ♪
♪ kick, kick, kick ♪
♪ kick buttowski ♪
♪ kick ♪
♪ kick ♪
♪ kick buttowski ♪
♪ kick, kick ♪
♪ kick, kick ♪
♪ kick buttowski ♪
♪ kick, kick ♪
♪ kick, kick ♪
♪ kick ♪
♪ kick ♪
♪ kick buttowski ♪
♪ kick buttowski ♪
[crash]
[screaming]
[screaming continues]
[squeak]
Yeah! Great test run, kick.
[crash] [cat yowls]
Good thing that was the test
dummy, huh, kick?
[gasps]
[clatter]
I hear pain! [screams]
Oh, yes! Yes!
Show me the scrapes.
Show... show me it.
Okay. Good. Yes!
Even better than the
famous rug burn of '08.
This one's going on the fridge.
Oh, jackie!
Your lingonberry pie is ready!
Lingonberry pie? My favorite!
Your... your favorite?
And your viking helmet of
the month just arrived.
Finally.
And i just polished your clogs.
[yodeling]
[thumping]
Aw. Ah.
So what was today's big stunt for
anyway, huh? [grunting]
I'm preparing for my eventual
descent down widowma...
Widomaker's pea-ea-ea-ea-ea-eak?
Yeah.
You must've snuck into my
house and ready my diary,
And now you know it's
been my greatest dream
To marry the first man who
conquers widowmaker's peak.
If you do eat it on
widowmaker's peak,
That would make me your widow!
Get it? Widowmaker's peak!
[squelch] ew. Roadkill.
♪♪ [humming tango music]
[shudders]
[shuddering laugh]
What's up, gunther?
You never drool this much.
Gunther? Are you listening?
Gunther! [buzzing]
Oh.
Sorry, kick, but i'm in love.
Hah! Love.
Oh. You're serious.
Well, then, who are you in...
uhh... with?
Well, it's...
[jackie] ki-i-i-i-ick!
My mother doesn't
approve of you!
Forbidden love.
[footsteps running]
She's never gonna want me.
She? Oh, right. The girl.
Wow. You've got it bad, huh?
Yes! So bad!
You know what?
I'm gonna help you
Get this dream girl. [slurping]
So who is she?
Well, she was just standing
outside that window.
Huh?
The only person that could be
Is wacky jackie, and...
[chuckling]
No! No. Come on. Not her.
Yes.
But she's wacky!
Only to you because
you don't love her.
But if jackie was
obsessed with me
The way she is with you,
Then she'd be out of
your hair and into mine,
Assuming that you have hair.
So you're saying that if we get
her to become obsessed with you,
Then she'll leave me alone,
All while making your
dreams come true.
But she doesn't even notice
me, kick.
Then getting you noticed
is step number 1.
There's nothing
jackie loves more
Than extreme daredevils,
So i'll show you how to be one.
I just rode over here on sewage.
Is that extreme enough?
Okay, gunther,
you need to master
The three rules of keeping
a daredevil attitude.
Rule 1: Speech.
Say something you'd
like to tell jackie.
"Dearest jackie,
"your face is like an
apple, ripe to the touch.
You make my heart
beat within my womb."
Enough.
If you need at least five words
To convey something,
use two instead.
Simplify, gunther. Simplify.
Rule 2: Focus.
Here. Follow the stick.
Excellent. How do you feel?
Ooh, i'm feeling really
nice and focused.
Ah-ah-ah-ah.
Feeling focused.
Third... most important...
reason.
Never, ever,
ever listen to reason.
Gunther, what are you doing?
Quiet, kick.
I'm listening to reason.
If you can master
these three rules,
You're on your way to
being an extreme daredevil.
Any questions?
"Dearest jackie, your face is
like an apple, ripe to the touch."
Come on, gunther, simplify.
Fart.
Fart, fart.
Hello? Hello? Is anyone there?
[sniffles]
She didn't even notice me.
She didn't notice you
Because you still
don't look the part.
Look the part.
Something tells me this
looks better on you.
In that outfit,
Ladies won't be able
to tell the difference.
Ki-i-i-i-ick!
Lookit!
Ugh! She's all yours.
I made it with
your old bandages.
I didn't have enough
for the last letter,
But maybe you can
make me some more
When you go down
widowmaker's peak!
Kick? Hmm? No one's there.
Even with this hot ensemble,
she didn't notice me.
What am i doing wrong?
Did you keep a steely gaze
when she looked at you?
No, kick. Don't you get it?
Jackie loves people
For the extremely cool
things that they can do,
And that's why i
need to do this.
Do what?
I'm going down widowmaker's peak.
Hah! Gunther, that's insane.
Even i'm not ready
for widowmaker's peak.
That's why i have to do it.
I have to outdo the best.
Come on, gunther.
Listen to reason.
Oh!
[kick] never listen to reason.
Listen to reason. Gotcha.
Good, gunther, 'cause this time, i...
[door closes]
Aw, biscuits.
Come one, come all!
Actually, just jackie.
'Cause gunther is about
to be the first man
To conquer widowmaker's peak!
Oh, kick,
you're such a good kisser.
I repeat, widowmaker's peak!
Widowmaker's peak?
[crow cawing]
Those girls gonna go in that box
And go down the
hill and get hurt.
Gunther, you can't do this!
Do you want to die?
No. I want to live...
Till it hurts. [grunting]
Gunther,
i won't let you do this.
You're gonna get hurt.
I have to do this.
I gotta get the girl.
No girl is gonna
come between us.
And getting rid of jackie
Isn't worth losing
my best friend.
Come on, buddy.
We'll find another way.
Leave me alone!
Get out of the car.
Go away!
You gotta let me do this!
I said get out! I said go away.
Your breath smells
like stratosphere.
That's not my breath.
That's the wind. Wind?
[straining]
Gunther,
you're perfectly balanced.
Don't move.
Don't even make a sound.
Why?
[screaming]
[screaming continues]
[yells]
[screaming continues]
[grunting]
[screaming continues]
[bear growling]
[growling continues]
[bear grunting]
[kick yelling]
[grunts]
Gunther, you're the first one
to conquer widowmaker's peak?
[cheering]
I am the first one! Hmm.
[grunts]
[gasping]
I never realized
You've been such a
daredevil all this time,
Hiding behind the
glory of your friend.
Marry me. I do.
Congratulations, gunther.
Wow. You didn't tell me how
easy this stuff was, kick.
Quiet, you big-talking man.
Ew. Roadkill.
Way to go, gunther. [cheering]
You got the girl,
and i got rid of the girl.
I just love a man who can
take a hit from a bear.
I'm gonna make a blog
And start following
you all around.
Uh...
[bell ringing] [teacher] all
right, students. Quiet down.
Monday is a very special day.
Can anyone tell me
what that might be?
Ooh, ooh!
Spaghetti and meatballs day?
Mmm. Well, there's that.
But it's also bring
your dad to school day.
[cheering]
It's my dad's weekend
to get his back shaved,
So he'll be all nice
and smooth for monday.
Eww! Eww!
[groans]
What's the matter, buttowski?
Not excited to bring
your dad to school?
Oh, i'm totally jumping
up and down on the inside.
Hah! I bet that's because
Your dad is lame.
Ooh! Ooh!
Not a chance, mouth.
My dad is the coolest.
He's the x in extreme
And the extreme
in extremely cool.
When the heavens needed
a mold for awesome,
They used my dad.
Ohh! Ohh!
And then he broke
that very mold.
Uh, kick, do you have a different
dad that i don't know about?
No way, gunther.
My dad is totally...
You boys keep it down.
I'm building card castles.
Lame.
What are you gonna do?
I've got the weekend
to make him awesome.
How hard could that be?
Whoo-hoo!
Double-decker!
Okay, so why are we doing this?
I'll, uh,
give you the details later.
As long as i get to do
groovy things with my son.
Shouldn't you start
with something smaller?
No time for small. Okay, dad.
Get on the board.
And remember,
live till it hurts.
Live till it hurts!
Aah!
[crash] [grunts]
Oh, it hurts.
It hurts.
[high-pitched voice] and hurts.
Whoa! [yelling]
Ahh! This just might work.
[crash]
Yep. Still hurts.
Or not.
[grunts]
I love doing this stuff with
you, son,
But what's all this for again?
Nothing, dad.
Never mind.
What am i gonna do?
Everyone's expecting me to bring
my cool dad to school on monday.
Aw, don't worry about it.
Your dad will be fine.
Oh, sure. You can say that.
Look at your cool dad.
What too cold?
[teeth chattering]
There! Is hot enough for you?
[screaming]
Yep. He's pretty cool.
Would it have been too much
to ask to have a cool dad like
Ninja dad,
Commando dad,
Or rock star dad?
Instead,
all i get is boring dad.
Well, what if your dad
pretended to be cool?
Nah.
Or, i could pretend
to have a cooler dad.
Oh, and i'll pretend
That i totally support this.
We've brought you
here today to audition
For a very extreme
and super-cool role.
So to begin, what would you do
If you were kick's dad?
[all screaming]
[screeching]
Coming through.
[yells]
[tires screeching]
Admittedly,
i saw that one coming.
Come on, gunther.
There's gotta be
Someone out there who
could play my dad.
Someone as smart
and awesome as me.
[bell dings]
Hoo-hoo. Classic.
Wade.
Hey, hey, it's danger
dude and his norse amigo.
Whatcha doing?
Just nuking a
microwavable burrito,
Big daddy of the
frozen snack world.
[slurping]
[grunting]
Brain burn!
Ha-ha!
Diminished.
I want a brain burn.
Dare to dream, norse amigo.
Dare to dream.
Now, how can the wade
be of assistance?
What would you do
if you were my dad?
I don't even know your
mom's favorite color.
No. It's bring your dad
to school day tomorrow,
And i'm making you my dad.
Okey-doke. I'm in.
What do i gotta do?
Just act cool.
[gunther] aghh! Brain burn!
Hey, magnus.
Just picking up a to-go order.
Hello, harry.
I'll be right with you.
Quick, finish first pass.
We have customer.
♪♪ [whistling]
[inhales deeply] mmm.
Viking chorizo.
You looking forward to monday?
Monday? Oh, of course.
I mean, who doesn't love
mondays, right?
What's monday?
It's take father to school day.
Kick no invite?
Hmm? No...
Uh, i'm sure he just forgot.
I'll just surprise
him at school.
Better get in a
little more practice.
[yells]
[bell ringing] [teacher] all
right, class.
Welcome to bring your
dad to school day.
Let's start with kendall.
This is my daddy.
He has the most interesting job.
Tell them what you do, daddy.
Well, i'm an actuary.
An actuary is a
business professional
Dealing in the financial
impact of risk and uncertainty.
Actuaries have a
deep understanding
Of financial security systems,
With a focus on
their complexity,
Their mathematics,
and their mechanisms.
Actuaries evaluate the
likelihood of events
And quantify the
contingent outcomes
In order to minimize losses,
Both emotional and financial.
[all snoring] [kendall
clears throat]
[all gasp]
Mm-hmm. Gunther magnuson.
This is my dad magnus.
He and my mom run the
battlesnax restaurant.
Hello, children.
Bookish boy in front.
Uh, why are you wearing a skirt?
It's not skirt!
It's warrior kilt!
I viking! I wear armor!
I challenge you to fight me!
Mmm. That good.
Maybe i put it on menu.
That's my pop.
[applause] mmm.
Next up, mouth...
Uh, christopher.
Listen up, slackers.
My dad is the cool second
assistant security guard
At the mellowbrook mall.
Prepare to be impressed.
Who ya gonna call
When you got trouble
in your mall?
Boo-yah!
Ooh! Ooh!
Who's the coolest dad?
Buttowski. Who? Buttowski.
[teacher] next
up, mr. Buttowski.
Ha. Just in time.
Allow me to introduce... My dad,
The coolest dad ever.
Uh, hello, dudes and dudettes.
"My name is," uh, "kick's dad,
And i'm the most awesome
dad in the universe."
That's right. And is there
anyone more awesome than you,
My real dad?
Real dad?
"The only person
more awesome than me
Is point to kick."
Uh-oh. Uh, "is my real son
Kick."
"let me tell you a little
bit about my awesome life."
There i was,
Surrounded on all sides
by ninja assassins,
So i was... [karate yells]
[yells continue] [gasping]
What?
The chopper swooped
in and picked me up,
And soon we're flying
over the jungle canopy,
But the l.Z.
Was hot, and we couldn't land,
So i had to jump.
Yaah! [kids scream]
The enemy was hot on my tail,
so i was all... [grunts]
[imitating machine gun firing]
And i made it just in time
for my rock and roll concert.
♪♪ [imitating guitar]
And that was all this morning.
Wow! Wow!
I had no idea.
Kick is embarrassed
to be my son.
♪♪ [imitating guitar]
[yells]
Did not see that coming.
[all] wade?
Wade? Total shocker.
Ha! That's not your real dad!
I knew your dad was lame.
[laughing] [bell ringing]
[laughing continues]
I screwed up, gunther.
I think you would've been better
off bringing your real dad.
I know.
He may not be awesome or extreme,
But i couldn't ask
for a better dad.
Plus, he would've
kept his moustache on.
Look on the bright side, kick.
What?
It's spaghetti
and meatballs day!
Hmm.
Time to get awesome.
Next.
[kids whooping]
Yeah, dad! Go!
[cheering]
Coolest dad ever.
Well, well, well.
Looks like my dad's the winner.
It really doesn't matter, mouth.
That's 'cause your
dad's a no-show.
Maybe he saved
the best for last.
Dad, it's okay. You don't have...
don't worry. I've been practicing.
[yells]
[yelling]
Whoa! Something cooler! Yeah!
Jeezo pizza.
Did i make a mess of everything?
No, dad.
I made a mess of everything.
You are awesome.
But the stunt failed.
Not because of the stunt.
Because you did it for me.
Thanks. Anytime, son.
And next time, just ask me.
I might surprise you.
Have i died and gone to
spaghetti and meatball heaven?
Awesome! Cool!
[kids cheering]
So, i'd love to try
that ramp again.
How about we build a
card castle instead?
Are you sure?
I kind of like that motto...
Live till it... aah!
Stepped on noodles!
[crash] ow! It hurts.
I'll have the special.
[clatter]
You want fries with that?