Josie and the Pussy Cats in Outer Space (1972-1974): Season 1, Episode 1 - Where's Josie? - full transcript

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[theme song]

♪ Josie in outer space ♪

♪ Pussycats are all in place ♪

♪ Blasting off on another chase ♪

♪ Mars, stars, the Milky Way ♪

♪ When they're groovin'
who can say ♪

♪ Buckle up your seatbelts ♪

♪ They could be in
orbit in the stars ♪

♪ On a spooky planet
maybe Mars ♪

♪ There's no way of knowing
when they're groovin' ♪

♪ Way above the atmosphere
trying to get back to here ♪



♪ They're blasting off now ♪

♪ Josie's on a rocket ride ♪

♪ Pussycats are by her side ♪

♪ Bleep Bleep is
the kooky guide ♪

♪ Come along and
dig the chase ♪

♪ With the Pussycats
in outer space ♪

♪ The Pussycats
in outer space ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

[dramatic music]

Haven't you figured
out how to steer

this dumb spaceship
yet, Valerie.

Stop moaning. If it weren't
for you, dear sister

we wouldn't be in this predicament.

What so perilous?



There's no danger of
running into anything.

That's right. There's plenty of
space out there in space.

Not as much as you think.
Look!

Yikes!

[giggles] That's pretty.

We're on a collision course with it.

- 'Valerie, Alan, do something.'
- What should we do first, Val?

This is no time to procrastinate, Alan.

Do everything, and maybe we'll get lucky.

Oh, let me do that.

[chattering]

- You're both so helpless.
- It's getting closer!

- Alan, give me a hand, hurry.
- Okay, Val.

Slow us down.
Slow us down!

(Alan) 'We're trying, Alex.
We're trying.'

(Valerie) 'Fire the retrorockets,
Alan, now.'

[intense music]

(Alan) Hang on, everybody,
we're gonna...hit.

- 'Hey.'
- 'Watch it.'

- 'Take it easy.'
- 'Oh.'

- 'Unh!'
- 'Oh.'

- 'Hang on.'
- 'See.'

(Alexandra) 'I knew I could
get us down safely.'

[intense music]

[creak]

We're safe.
We're safe.

[laughs]

It may not be Earth,
but I love it. I love it.

(Bleep)
Bleep, bleep, bleep..

Huh!

W-w-wh-what?

[bleeps]

Yeow!
Back, back, go back!

- Look out.
- Go back!

What's the matter with you, Alex?

Maybe my chicken brother
met a space chicken.

I-I-I was attacked.

A tremendous space monster
tried to bite my nose off.

Oh, Alex, chickens don't bite noses.

- Where is it, Alex?
- It's out there.

Let's blast out of here.

(Bleep)
'Bleep, bleep, bleep..'

That's him!
That's him!

[bleeps]

[yowls]

Is that the tremendous monster, Alex?

Oh, I think it's just
trying to be friendly.

[giggles] Isn't he cute?

[bleeps]

See, he didn't try to
bite your nose off, Alex.

'He just likes to kiss.'

[bleep]

Oh, I think he's just adorable.
He says his name is Bleep.

He told you his
name was Bleep?

Uh-huh.
I can understand him.

Let's keep him as a mascot, okay.

Well, I think one pet in
this outfit is enough,

and Sebastian is it.

All in favor of keeping Bleep as
a space mascot, say aye.

(all) Aye.

- Aye, aye, aye.
- Bleep, bleep.

- No.
- The ayes have it.

[hisses and growls]

You're in, Bleep. From now on
you're one of Josie's Pussycats.

Come on, gang, we better
examine the spaceship

'to see if we
suffered any damage.'

Spaceship is okay. What are
we waiting for? Let's go.

There's no telling what we
may find on this planetoid.

That's what I'm afraid of.

Josie, Josie, where are you?

[bleeps]

(Melody)
'He's pointing to something.'

(Alexandra)
'Thing is right. It's Josie.'

Oh, come on, slowpoke,
easy does it.

[splash]

Josie. Josie, are you alright?

(Melody)
'She's having a nervous breakup.'

[crackle]

- Yikes!
- That isn't Josie.

'It's a mechanical doll.
A robot.'

- 'Where's the real Josie?'
- 'I don't know.'

But someone sent
this electromechanical

look-alike back in her place.

Yes, an android, and we wouldn't
have known the difference

if it hadn't fallen into the
water and short-circuited.

W-w-what d-do we do now?

Well, there's one thing for sure.

We can't leave now until
we find the real Josie.

[whoosh]

Who are you, and where
are you taking me?

'Huh, not even a one-to-one
communication.'

Josie, where are you?

Josie, are you in there?
Answer me.

V-Val, look.
Space monsters.

(all)
Space monsters?

There is nothing to fear.

Welcome to the planetoid Zelc.
My name is Jor.

This is the leader
of my people Zorb..

...and this is the chief of the
Zelc security force, Monz.

You must be tired.
Come to Zelcor with us.

You will find my people
most hospitable.

Well, thank you, sir.
But we can't do that.

One of our group is missing.

We must stay until we find her.

Give us the details,
we will help you. Come.

(Zorb) 'Monz and
his security force'

'will conduct a thorough
search for your friend.'

(Monz) 'I will mobilize our
entire department.'

I know you are concerned,
but Monz is very diligent.

He will find her.

I demand to know
where you're taking me.

Yikes, an ocean.
And what is this place?

'You're sure a gabby one.'

Let me show
you around Zelcor.

It may take your
mind off your worries.

(Valerie) Hey, these moving
sidewalks are handy.

You mean, footie.

[giggles]

Wowie!
Who is that?

That is a statue of Karnak,
one of our former rulers.

- It looks so lifelike.
- Yeah.

It looks as lifelike as
that copy of Josie

that fell in the water.

Karnak had it erected in his
honor when he was in power.

Was in power?
Where is he now?

(Jor) 'Karnak was a mean
and ruthless ruler...'

'...and was exiled to an
island in the Zelcian Sea.'

'We've been free of his
tyranny ever since.'

[grunts] Gives me creeps
just looking at him.

What is it, Val?

I was just thinking
about that statue.

You mean that statue being as
lifelike as the fake Josie?

Right. Do you think
there's a connection?

Hmm, it's worth investigating.
Let's go.

(Jor) 'There it is,
Alan, Exile Island.'

(Valerie)
'Doesn't look very inviting.'

(Alex) 'Who says we're invited?'

(Jor) I shall hover close
by awaiting your return.

Shh! Let's go.

I don't like this.

Oh, don't scare me
like that, Josie.

(all) Josie?

[bleeps]

(Melody) 'Bleep says that's
really not Josie.'

Hmm, wait here.
I'll make a test.

If that's really you
Josie, forgive me.

[crackle]

(Melody) 'Poor Josie.
She's washed up.'

Oh, for heaven's sake, Melody.
That's not Josie.

[yowls]

[bleeps]

What's he bleeping about now?

Bleep says to follow him.

Must be something behind
that door. Stand back.

[grunting]

[bleeps]

Oh, Bleep, am I happy to see you?

Josie. Are you okay, Josie?

- Is it really you, Josie?
- Relax, Valerie.

You can be sure it's Josie.
Bleep knows.

Of course it's me.
Who did you think it was?

I'm not convinced.

[splash]

[gasps] Oh!

- 'No short-circuit.'
- 'She must be the real Josie.'

Alexandra, what was that for?

We'll explain later, Josie.

Right now, let's get out of here.

- Come on, everybody.
- 'Are we happy to find you.'

Hold it. It looks like
we're trapped.

All the doors are barred shut.

(Alex) 'Alan, that door
is closing too.'

Let's not panic.
Be calm.

[splatt splatt]

Yikes!
A population explosion.

- This I don't believe.
- It's spooky.

[bleeps]

- I'm scared.
- I'm doubly scared.

[meows]

Oh, boy. Let's split
this weird scene, gang.

Here we go, all you real Pussycats.

'Faster, faster!'

[bleeps]

Hurry, get out while
I hold the androids off.

(Josie) Okay, Alan.

[bleeps]

[grunts]

I can't hold them, unh.

[bash]

Alan! Alan, where are you?

Uh-oh! You're not
the real Alan.

♪ La la lala la la ♪

[instrumental music]

♪ Bubble bubble bubble ♪

♪ Bubble bubble bubble ♪

♪ Bubble bubble
we're in trouble ♪

♪ Yeah what's
wrong with that ♪

♪ Everywhere with all around us ♪

♪ But we know
that it won't last ♪

♪ Oh bubbles bubbles magical.. ♪

♪ Bubble bubble bubble oh ♪

♪ Sing these words and
you'll be trouble free ♪

♪ Bubble bubble bubble
no more trouble ♪

♪ Bubble bubble bubble
no more trouble ♪

♪ La la la lalala la la ♪

♪ La lala lala ooh ♪

[bash]

♪ Bubble bubble when
you're in trouble ♪

[indistinct singing]

♪ Double trouble ♪

♪ Sing these words out
from your heart.. ♪

♪ Bubble bubble oh it'll
make you feel just dandy ♪

♪ That makes the trip right dandy ♪

[indistinct singing]

♪ There's too much to life ♪

♪ Bubble bubble bubble ♪

♪ No more ♪

♪ Trouble la ♪♪

Here's the way we came in, Josie.

- This way, Bleep.
- Bleep, bleep, bleep..

Come on, Alex, through this opening.

Yeah, am I glad to
get out of here.

- Is everyone here?
- Yeah, yeah.

Let's go, let's go.

Wait, where's Melody?

Over here. Here I am.

'Hurry, Melody,
let's get out of here.'

Just a sec.

[splash]

[sighs] That's a relief.

What was that all about?

I just wanted to be sure that
I'm the real me, hee-hee.

Come on, Melody.
Jor is waiting for us.

Oh! Melody, hurry up.

(Alan) Well, Jor, we
have Josie back safely...

...but we still don't know
what's going on around here.

As long as we have Josie
back, who cares?

(Jor) 'And that's the
whole story, Monz.'

As soon as we got away,
we came straight here.

Hmm.

Tell me, did you see the
Zelc who kidnapped you?

Oh, yes, sir.

I'll never forget that wicked
face as long as I live, yuck.

Now, you Earth youngsters have meddled

in this investigation
from the very start.

- Yes, sir, but--
- 'And you, Jor..'

'You took these strangers
to Exile Island.'

'All of you have
broken our law.'

Therefore, I have no choice
but to confine you..

...for the duration
of this investigation.

Guards, take them away.

Jor, are you sure Monz and
Zorb are good guys?

Of course, Valerie, they
have ruled my people

since Karnak was overthrown.

'Everyone loves them.'

- What happened?
- Bleep?

Oh, poor Bleep. I gave
him a drink, and look.

Oh, for heaven's sake, Melody,
that's not the real Bleep.

You must have brought back
one of those look-alike things.

Then the real Bleep
must still be okay.

- Uh-oh!
- 'What is it, Alan?'

(Alan) 'They've moved our
spaceship into town.'

'It appears as
though they're gonna'

'send our dummies into space.'

(Alex) 'And k-keep us
locked up here?'

- What can we do, Alan?
- Anyone got a suggestion?

- Listen.
-' Bleep, bleep..'

Look, the real Bleep.

(MELODY) 'Super! Where there's
Bleep, there's hope.'

(Alex) You mean, like, I hope
he can get us outta here.

Look around, Bleep,
see if you can

find a way to open this door.

(Zorb) We are sad to see
our young friends leave...

...but they are anxious to
return to their own planet.

So regretfully we must say farewell.

Attaboy, Bleep.
That's it, a fantastic idea.

'I think he'll do it.'

He did it. Come on. Let's go
join that going away party.

- Nice going, Bleep.
- Jor, wait a minute.

The pieces of this puzzle are
beginning to fall into place.

I'd like you to go back
to Exile Island

and see if you can locate...

Our brief visit has
been a pleasant one

and we appreciate your
warm hospitality.

- Hi, folks.
- Mind if we join the party?

[all gasp]

They are imposters.
Guards, seize them.

[crowd chattering]

Wait, we only want to
liven up the party.

(Valerie) Watch.

(Melody) 'You're gonna love this.'

[splash]

Guards!

[all gasp]

- I think I'm gonna enjoy this.
- Me too.

This should take care
of those fakers.

[boom]

[boom]

[bleeps]

[sniggering]

- What is going on?
- It's a long story, sir, but--

Alan, Alan, look.

'That's the man who
kidnapped me.'

(Alan) 'The real Karnak.'

- 'The real Karnak.'
- 'He's escaping.'

(male #1) 'Guards, guards,
it's the evil Karnak.'

'Catch him.'

I got him.

I think this man can
explain everything, sir.

What have you done with
our leaders, Karnak?

Look, Jor is back.

Val and some friends are with him.

Hmm, perhaps they can
answer that question.

(male #2) 'Our leaders,
the real leaders.'

My people, I speak for
Monz and Krelgo

as well as myself, when I say

it is good to be
among you once more.

[crowd cheering]

Karnak forced our foremost
sculptor, Krelgo

'to fabricate the amazing
mechanical androids'

you have seen today..

...then imprisoned us
on Exile Island

'hoping to once more rule
Zelcor with an iron hand.'

'But thanks to Jor and
our young Earth friends'

his evil plan was foiled

and the diabolical
dupli-machine destroyed.

[crowd cheering]

[crowd booing]

♪ Bubble bubble bubble no more ♪

♪ Bubble bubble bubble no more ♪

♪ Bubble bubble bubble no more ♪

♪ Bubble bubble bubble no more ♪

♪ Bubble bubble bubble no more ♪

♪ Bubble bubble bubble no more ♪

♪ Bubble bubble bubble no more ♪

♪ Trouble ♪

To show our appreciation

our scientists programmed
your navigational computers

'on a course back to Earth.'

Like, wow! That's the
nicest going-away present

you could've given us.

Thank you, sir.

(all)
We all thank you.

Goodbye, Jor.

[giggles]

- All systems A-okay.
- Contact.

[rumbling]

[instrumental music]

- 'We're headed for home!'
- 'Yippee!'

Now that we are headed
back to Earth

let's try to tune in
some good music from home.

(Valarie) 'No, no, don't
touch those dials, Alexandra.'

Everything was preset
by the Zelc scientists

to get us back home.
Don't change it.

Oh, I know what I'm doing.

Let's see now.
I think it's this one.

No? Maybe it's this one.

(Josie) Alexandra, you've
thrown us off our course.

(Alexandra) 'Oh, quiet.
I've got everything under control.'

(Alex) 'My dear sister
has done it again.'

(Alan) 'Val, take over
before it's too late.'

- 'I've got it.'
- I'll hold Alexandra's hands.

- 'Alan!'
- 'Uh.'

'Just to keep them
off the controls.'

[laughter]

Ressynch: Kilo

[theme song]

♪ They're blasting off now ♪

♪ Josie's on a rocket ride ♪

♪ Pussycats all by her side ♪

♪ Bleep Bleep is the kooky guide ♪

♪ Come along and dig the chase ♪

♪ With the Pussycats in outer space ♪

♪ The Pussycats in outer space ♪

♪ Yeah ♪♪