Jackie Chan Adventures (2000–2005): Season 2, Episode 39 - The Amazing T-Girl - full transcript
Captain Black is ordered to remove the Talismans from Section 13. So they're force to a new place for them. Dai Long Wong tries for the Talismans, unaware that all the powers of the Talismans have been transferred into the Amazing T-Girl.
(Alarm blares)
The main vault.
I apologize in advance
if Jade has been on one
of her "talisman raids."
(Alarm stops)
Alarm circuit disengaged.
I'm sorry.
Do you have clearance?
Captain black.
You did know my technicians
would be installing
the new vault
security system today?
Must have missed the
memo, hirsch.
Ooh, I bet the higher-ups
heard I cracked the old system.
Heh heh.
Jade has a very
active imagination.
(Whirring)
What are those?
Those would be
level 3 classified.
The kid's right.
Sorry, hirsch.
Classified or no,
those are not on my
list, captain.
They will have to go.
What?! What?!
I'll handle this, Jackie.
You are so busted.
(Blows raspberry)
Black here.
Operations is insisting we
remove level 3 classifieds
from the vaul...
The talismans, sir.
Right.
The magic ones.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
I see.
Well? Well?
We have to clear the talismans
out of the vault.
Pronto.
Captain black is trying
to pull strings with Washington,
but it does not look promising.
Hmm.
What's the big whoop?
We can keep the talismans here
in one of uncle's magic boxes.
The risk is too great.
The talismans will be safest
from dark forces
on sacred ground.
We must take them to
the Ben-shui temple.
But... but isn't that,
like, near China?
Jade, the talismans
are unpredictable,
dangerous.
You should not be
playing with them
in the first place.
(Blows raspberry)
(Snip)
Testing.
I'm in.
I'm gonna miss you guys.
How about one last hurrah,
for old times' sake?
Hmm.
(Hydraulic humming)
Uh-oh.
Huh?
Aah! Ooh...
(groaning)
Man: Section 13's a long way
from Washington, captain black.
Black: I promise your trip
will be worthwhile, sir.
(Gasps) Black: Follow me.
Once you see just how
powerful these talismans are,
I'm sure you'll agree it's
imperative we keep them here,
under lock and laser.
Whew.
Those guys must be blind.
Observe.
The power of...
Invisibility.
Astonishing, isn't it?
I could be over here.
Or perhaps I'm over here.
Hmm. Must not be doing it right.
Never mind.
Let's try...
Levitation.
(Grunting)
Uhh...
I... Don't understand. It's...
Running a section
can be very stressful,
captain black.
I'm authorizing 2
weeks of r and r,
effective immediately.
I suggest you get as
far away from here
as possible.
I'm very sorry about this.
You should be sorry.
We are not used to
traveling with outsiders.
You are ruining our feng shui.
Uh...
I meant about the talismans.
I just couldn't get the
rocks to work their magic.
You gotta have the right touch.
Jade...
Not even for
demonstration purposes?
No.
Rats!
Now, be a good girl and
play with your moose.
Guh-huh!
Right on, Mr. mean jeans.
Yes...
Magic approaches.
Potent magic.
Huh?
The talismans of shendu!
Gan. Chui. Ren.
Reclaim the talismans
for the forces of darkness.
(Groans)
We must rest now.
Because the sun is high?
Because uncle is pooped.
Right. I'll scout ahead.
I'm not tired. I'll scout, too.
Last one up the trail
is a monkey's talisman.
Ahoy there!
(Gasps)
Ahh!
You must be the Ben-shui monks.
No! They're daolon
wong's dark warriors!
Hello!
Evil forces ahead.
Bad chi rising.
Why are you ignoring me?
What a coinkidink.
We were just on our
way to your temple
to give you these.
Jackie!
Jackie! Jackie!
Wake up!
Wake up! (Snoring)
Aah!
What am I doing there?
Astral projection?
But I didn't touch the tal...
Talk to myself later.
Jackie! Wake up!
(Sputtering)
What?
What is it?
Dark warriors! That way!
You guys sure don't talk much.
Vow of silence?
Jackie: Captain black, no!
Uncle: They are impostors!
(All gasp)
Whoa, Nellie.
Jackie!
Take the talismans to the
temple, quickly!
Uncle! Jackie!
You won't believe this, but...
Wha...
No! The talismans!
The talismans!
Daah!
Hand over the talismans!
Huh?
Broken?
Told you.
Ohh!
The forces of darkness
have just grown more powerful.
Do not be concerned, friends.
The power of the
talismans lies within.
You got them back?
Jackie, Jackie.
The holy man speaks
in the mystical sense.
As in,
"may the force be with you."
Or, "we are the world."
Right?
Oh, no, no.
The power of the talismans
truly lies...
Within.
Jade: Jackie, check it out!
I'm super strong.
Super fast.
Super gone.
Super chimp.
Super talisman powered.
I'm t-girl!
H-h-h-how?
Not sure, but I think
each finger controls
a different power,
which would leave
2 unaccounted for.
Not what I meant!
Oh. Not sure how it happened.
Maybe...
(Gasp) When I got
zapped in the vault.
Duh.
Aah! Aah! Aah!
Whoa.
So that's how I
do heat beam eyes.
Maybe dragon blast
is my bellybutton.
No, Jade! No dragon blast!
The powers must be returned
to their proper vessels,
with a restoration spell.
Ohh...
But we must first retrieve
the talismans themselves.
Well, what are we waiting for?
Let's find wong and stomp his
ancient, shriveled...
But, Jackie,
I have the power.
Which daolon wong wants.
Which is why you
must stay here...
Safe.
The power of...
Invisibility.
Am I over here?
Or perhaps over here?
Uuh?
Pah!
Dragon blast!
(Exasperated snort)
Heat beam eyes!
Forgeries!
We have been tricked!
(Sighs)
Rooster, ox, snake,
rabbit, sheep,
monkey, tiger, dog, horse...
Rat!
Haven't put that
bad boy to the test.
Motion to the motionless.
Guh-huh.
Why are we stopping?
Uncle has the willies.
Daolon: That's not all that you
have, old man.
Surrender the talismans and...
Let me guess.
No one gets hurt.
Who is this joker?
Whoa! - Whoa! - Whoa!
Daolon wong is a very powerful
dark chi master.
No joke.
Now, where have you hidden
the real talismans, chi wizard?
That would be none
of your beeswax.
Very well.
Ren!
Hyah!
Jade...
Thank me later.
And, please, call me...
T-girl!
And let's hear it
for her trusty
sidekick supermoose!
Guh-huh.
So...
The talisman powers
reside within you.
Jade, no!
Horse and dog, Jackie.
I'm self-healing...
And immortal to boot.
Seize her!
Guh-huh.
Antler action!
Pow!
Bam!
Ooh! Uhh! Uhh...
Ooh...
Heartbreaker.
(Sniffing)
Whoa...
Uhh! Hey!
My warriors can
smell your magic.
Huh! Huh!
Huh! Hyah! Huh! Whoa!
Hyah! Hyah!
Lion!
And this one's for the moose.
Aah! - Aah! - Aah!
Jade!
Heh. Had heat beams in my eyes.
Huh!
Timber.
(Chanting)
All right, chi whiz.
Are you gonna go quietly,
or do I have to smoke you, too?
Wha...
Uhh! What the hey?
I... Can't... Move!
From the neck down like
your helpless friends,
so that you may not draw power
from your fingertips.
Jackie: Jade! No!
Black: Don't make
me come over there.
Jade: Jackie!
(Grunting)
(Grunting)
Do not waste your strength.
Someone will come.
Let us hope it is not a wolf.
Or a yeti.
Well, they have those
here, right?
Guh-huh.
This is a job for supermoose.
(Humming)
I told you someone would come.
Let... Me... Go!
I had hoped to
possess the talismans,
but I shall instead,
like yourself,
become them.
Yeah? Too bad you can't
get them out of me.
Can't I?
(Sniffing)
Hope he knows where he's going.
Ow!
He is born of talisman magic!
And magic seeks magic.
(Chanting)
Supermoose: Da da da dah ta-dah!
Antler action!
Ohh!
Uhh! Gaach!
Whoa!
Gan! Ren! Chui!
(Gasp)
Ooh, let's rumble!
Right beside ya.
No!
Uncle needs your assistance!
Jackie. Hello!
I may be a rag doll,
but I'm still t-girl.
Ohh!
Booster from the rooster.
My pinky!
Chihuahua!
(Yipping)
Cute.
Dragon blast would be
nice right about now.
But heat beam eyes will do.
Hand over the girl.
Come and get me.
(Blows raspberry)
Whoa.
The tongue is dragon blast.
Wha...
(chanting)
T-girl!
Ohh!
(Chanting)
Guh-huh.
(Repeating chant)
(All chanting)
(Chanting)
(Blows raspberry)
Save your breath, child.
The absorption
process has begun.
(Black, uncle,
and supermoose chanting)
(Chanting continues)
You are too late.
I have become the talismans...
aah...
(chanting continues)
Guh-huh.
Got my bones back.
I will have my revenge, old man.
Nice spell.
All that daolon
absorbed from Jade
was a taste of his own dark chi.
And the talisman powers
have returned to
their proper places.
Jade: Ohh...
Do we have to leave
the talismans here?
Yes, Jade,
I'm afraid that we do.
(Cell phone rings)
Black here.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Yes, Mr. vice president.
I fired off a memo
about the talismans
before we left, and...
Let's just say the
veep's very intrigued
and wants a demonstration.
Jackie,
I think we should celebrate
by using the horse
talisman to heal moosey.
The little fella did dig us out
of a real mess, Jackie.
Seems the least we could do.
(Sighs)
This is the last time.
Cool!
(Gasp)
Oh, boy.
Uh, what was the
dragon blast doing
in the horse talisman?
(Gasp) Uncle,
I fear there has been a mix-up.
Hmph!
This never happened to t-girl.
Hey, Jackie!
Yes.
What sorts of things do
you do to stay in shape?
Basically,
training with my stunt guy,
with my student, 3 hour a day.
Lift weight.
Fast...
choo-choo-choo choo-choo.
Badminton's good.
Almost nonstop.
Shoo! Shoo!
Ping-pong.
Move your whole body.
Pah! Hah! Hah! Sha!
Also boxing.
The rhythm...
bam-bam-bam-bam. Bam! Bam!
Training is very important, yes.
The main vault.
I apologize in advance
if Jade has been on one
of her "talisman raids."
(Alarm stops)
Alarm circuit disengaged.
I'm sorry.
Do you have clearance?
Captain black.
You did know my technicians
would be installing
the new vault
security system today?
Must have missed the
memo, hirsch.
Ooh, I bet the higher-ups
heard I cracked the old system.
Heh heh.
Jade has a very
active imagination.
(Whirring)
What are those?
Those would be
level 3 classified.
The kid's right.
Sorry, hirsch.
Classified or no,
those are not on my
list, captain.
They will have to go.
What?! What?!
I'll handle this, Jackie.
You are so busted.
(Blows raspberry)
Black here.
Operations is insisting we
remove level 3 classifieds
from the vaul...
The talismans, sir.
Right.
The magic ones.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
I see.
Well? Well?
We have to clear the talismans
out of the vault.
Pronto.
Captain black is trying
to pull strings with Washington,
but it does not look promising.
Hmm.
What's the big whoop?
We can keep the talismans here
in one of uncle's magic boxes.
The risk is too great.
The talismans will be safest
from dark forces
on sacred ground.
We must take them to
the Ben-shui temple.
But... but isn't that,
like, near China?
Jade, the talismans
are unpredictable,
dangerous.
You should not be
playing with them
in the first place.
(Blows raspberry)
(Snip)
Testing.
I'm in.
I'm gonna miss you guys.
How about one last hurrah,
for old times' sake?
Hmm.
(Hydraulic humming)
Uh-oh.
Huh?
Aah! Ooh...
(groaning)
Man: Section 13's a long way
from Washington, captain black.
Black: I promise your trip
will be worthwhile, sir.
(Gasps) Black: Follow me.
Once you see just how
powerful these talismans are,
I'm sure you'll agree it's
imperative we keep them here,
under lock and laser.
Whew.
Those guys must be blind.
Observe.
The power of...
Invisibility.
Astonishing, isn't it?
I could be over here.
Or perhaps I'm over here.
Hmm. Must not be doing it right.
Never mind.
Let's try...
Levitation.
(Grunting)
Uhh...
I... Don't understand. It's...
Running a section
can be very stressful,
captain black.
I'm authorizing 2
weeks of r and r,
effective immediately.
I suggest you get as
far away from here
as possible.
I'm very sorry about this.
You should be sorry.
We are not used to
traveling with outsiders.
You are ruining our feng shui.
Uh...
I meant about the talismans.
I just couldn't get the
rocks to work their magic.
You gotta have the right touch.
Jade...
Not even for
demonstration purposes?
No.
Rats!
Now, be a good girl and
play with your moose.
Guh-huh!
Right on, Mr. mean jeans.
Yes...
Magic approaches.
Potent magic.
Huh?
The talismans of shendu!
Gan. Chui. Ren.
Reclaim the talismans
for the forces of darkness.
(Groans)
We must rest now.
Because the sun is high?
Because uncle is pooped.
Right. I'll scout ahead.
I'm not tired. I'll scout, too.
Last one up the trail
is a monkey's talisman.
Ahoy there!
(Gasps)
Ahh!
You must be the Ben-shui monks.
No! They're daolon
wong's dark warriors!
Hello!
Evil forces ahead.
Bad chi rising.
Why are you ignoring me?
What a coinkidink.
We were just on our
way to your temple
to give you these.
Jackie!
Jackie! Jackie!
Wake up!
Wake up! (Snoring)
Aah!
What am I doing there?
Astral projection?
But I didn't touch the tal...
Talk to myself later.
Jackie! Wake up!
(Sputtering)
What?
What is it?
Dark warriors! That way!
You guys sure don't talk much.
Vow of silence?
Jackie: Captain black, no!
Uncle: They are impostors!
(All gasp)
Whoa, Nellie.
Jackie!
Take the talismans to the
temple, quickly!
Uncle! Jackie!
You won't believe this, but...
Wha...
No! The talismans!
The talismans!
Daah!
Hand over the talismans!
Huh?
Broken?
Told you.
Ohh!
The forces of darkness
have just grown more powerful.
Do not be concerned, friends.
The power of the
talismans lies within.
You got them back?
Jackie, Jackie.
The holy man speaks
in the mystical sense.
As in,
"may the force be with you."
Or, "we are the world."
Right?
Oh, no, no.
The power of the talismans
truly lies...
Within.
Jade: Jackie, check it out!
I'm super strong.
Super fast.
Super gone.
Super chimp.
Super talisman powered.
I'm t-girl!
H-h-h-how?
Not sure, but I think
each finger controls
a different power,
which would leave
2 unaccounted for.
Not what I meant!
Oh. Not sure how it happened.
Maybe...
(Gasp) When I got
zapped in the vault.
Duh.
Aah! Aah! Aah!
Whoa.
So that's how I
do heat beam eyes.
Maybe dragon blast
is my bellybutton.
No, Jade! No dragon blast!
The powers must be returned
to their proper vessels,
with a restoration spell.
Ohh...
But we must first retrieve
the talismans themselves.
Well, what are we waiting for?
Let's find wong and stomp his
ancient, shriveled...
But, Jackie,
I have the power.
Which daolon wong wants.
Which is why you
must stay here...
Safe.
The power of...
Invisibility.
Am I over here?
Or perhaps over here?
Uuh?
Pah!
Dragon blast!
(Exasperated snort)
Heat beam eyes!
Forgeries!
We have been tricked!
(Sighs)
Rooster, ox, snake,
rabbit, sheep,
monkey, tiger, dog, horse...
Rat!
Haven't put that
bad boy to the test.
Motion to the motionless.
Guh-huh.
Why are we stopping?
Uncle has the willies.
Daolon: That's not all that you
have, old man.
Surrender the talismans and...
Let me guess.
No one gets hurt.
Who is this joker?
Whoa! - Whoa! - Whoa!
Daolon wong is a very powerful
dark chi master.
No joke.
Now, where have you hidden
the real talismans, chi wizard?
That would be none
of your beeswax.
Very well.
Ren!
Hyah!
Jade...
Thank me later.
And, please, call me...
T-girl!
And let's hear it
for her trusty
sidekick supermoose!
Guh-huh.
So...
The talisman powers
reside within you.
Jade, no!
Horse and dog, Jackie.
I'm self-healing...
And immortal to boot.
Seize her!
Guh-huh.
Antler action!
Pow!
Bam!
Ooh! Uhh! Uhh...
Ooh...
Heartbreaker.
(Sniffing)
Whoa...
Uhh! Hey!
My warriors can
smell your magic.
Huh! Huh!
Huh! Hyah! Huh! Whoa!
Hyah! Hyah!
Lion!
And this one's for the moose.
Aah! - Aah! - Aah!
Jade!
Heh. Had heat beams in my eyes.
Huh!
Timber.
(Chanting)
All right, chi whiz.
Are you gonna go quietly,
or do I have to smoke you, too?
Wha...
Uhh! What the hey?
I... Can't... Move!
From the neck down like
your helpless friends,
so that you may not draw power
from your fingertips.
Jackie: Jade! No!
Black: Don't make
me come over there.
Jade: Jackie!
(Grunting)
(Grunting)
Do not waste your strength.
Someone will come.
Let us hope it is not a wolf.
Or a yeti.
Well, they have those
here, right?
Guh-huh.
This is a job for supermoose.
(Humming)
I told you someone would come.
Let... Me... Go!
I had hoped to
possess the talismans,
but I shall instead,
like yourself,
become them.
Yeah? Too bad you can't
get them out of me.
Can't I?
(Sniffing)
Hope he knows where he's going.
Ow!
He is born of talisman magic!
And magic seeks magic.
(Chanting)
Supermoose: Da da da dah ta-dah!
Antler action!
Ohh!
Uhh! Gaach!
Whoa!
Gan! Ren! Chui!
(Gasp)
Ooh, let's rumble!
Right beside ya.
No!
Uncle needs your assistance!
Jackie. Hello!
I may be a rag doll,
but I'm still t-girl.
Ohh!
Booster from the rooster.
My pinky!
Chihuahua!
(Yipping)
Cute.
Dragon blast would be
nice right about now.
But heat beam eyes will do.
Hand over the girl.
Come and get me.
(Blows raspberry)
Whoa.
The tongue is dragon blast.
Wha...
(chanting)
T-girl!
Ohh!
(Chanting)
Guh-huh.
(Repeating chant)
(All chanting)
(Chanting)
(Blows raspberry)
Save your breath, child.
The absorption
process has begun.
(Black, uncle,
and supermoose chanting)
(Chanting continues)
You are too late.
I have become the talismans...
aah...
(chanting continues)
Guh-huh.
Got my bones back.
I will have my revenge, old man.
Nice spell.
All that daolon
absorbed from Jade
was a taste of his own dark chi.
And the talisman powers
have returned to
their proper places.
Jade: Ohh...
Do we have to leave
the talismans here?
Yes, Jade,
I'm afraid that we do.
(Cell phone rings)
Black here.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Yes, Mr. vice president.
I fired off a memo
about the talismans
before we left, and...
Let's just say the
veep's very intrigued
and wants a demonstration.
Jackie,
I think we should celebrate
by using the horse
talisman to heal moosey.
The little fella did dig us out
of a real mess, Jackie.
Seems the least we could do.
(Sighs)
This is the last time.
Cool!
(Gasp)
Oh, boy.
Uh, what was the
dragon blast doing
in the horse talisman?
(Gasp) Uncle,
I fear there has been a mix-up.
Hmph!
This never happened to t-girl.
Hey, Jackie!
Yes.
What sorts of things do
you do to stay in shape?
Basically,
training with my stunt guy,
with my student, 3 hour a day.
Lift weight.
Fast...
choo-choo-choo choo-choo.
Badminton's good.
Almost nonstop.
Shoo! Shoo!
Ping-pong.
Move your whole body.
Pah! Hah! Hah! Sha!
Also boxing.
The rhythm...
bam-bam-bam-bam. Bam! Bam!
Training is very important, yes.