Insecure (2016–…): Season 4, Episode 2 - Lowkey Distant - full transcript

- Self-care Sunday!
- Self-care Sunday!

Ever since I got my place
in order,

it's like my life followed too.

It's a whole new world,
I'm Jasmine.

Well come through,
Princess Flex.

This picture's gonna be great.
We just need

to lock in these sponsors,
and then you'll have

everything you need
for the block party.

Did these come from a client?

Yeah, from the new boo account.

I actually met him
at Tiff's baby shower.



His name is Lawrence.

Andrew said
that he was dating other people.

Should I trip, or nah?

Well he's here with you,
so what's the problem?

My name is Issa Dee,
and I'm organizing

the block party.
I love my neighborhood.

But it devastates me to see
our communities changing

without our input.
And so I want to change that.

It's weird
that you're still working

with Condola
when she's dating Lawrence.

You know your life don't have
to be this messy, right?

Andrew: Wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait.

So the baby's not even his?

Nope, my brother's trying
to sign himself up



to raise another man's child.

I mean, what if the baby
don't have no bones?

Uh, well, at least
they won't break any.

Shut up.

Oh, what now? God.

It's okay, you can take it.

Thanks. Sorry, it's work.

Yeah. No,
that's supposed to be Tuesday.

What? No, no, no, no,
wait, wait, wait.

Wow, really?

Okay, I'll talk to you tomorrow.

Everything okay?

Uh, it will be.

Uh-oh.

What happened?

I just lost a big... it's fine.

You sure?
You wanna talk about it?

I'd rather talk about that cake
I'm gonna have later.

Oh, but wait.

I'm not sharing.

Are you sure?

Oh, take the cake,
take the cake!

Take all of it!

So I was thinking the stage
could be right over there

and the food right over there.

And my interns, thanks to you,

can check in vendors over there.

This is great.
This space is so great.

Right? It's way better than
my dingy-ass courtyard.

You know somebody died there
three years ago?

So disgusting.

Oh, and I was thinking
maybe the dance floor

can happen, like, over there.

That's great. I also will be

steering very clear
of that area.

I really can't dance.

Oh, my God, me either.

I mostly do this thing
with my shoulder

that looks like a seizure
but don't call nobody.

So, I think this is the spot.

I don't know why I'm
clapping. This is incredible.

Thanks to you. This weekend,
I'm taking you out for drinks.

Oh, that's sweet,
I wish I could but I'm going out of town.

Oh, nice. For work or for fun?

Fun. Ojai Valley.

Oh, that's romantic.
Oh, that's romantic.

Yep, got it.

I'm so sorry.
I don't want it to be awkward

whenever Lawrence's name
comes up.

Me neither. It's really new.

Yeah, and we work
so well together.

- I know.
- And I just want us to be cool

'cause I only have room
for good energy.

I agree. No bad energy.

- No weirdness.
- None.

I'm not about to let someone
who puts mayonnaise

on his french fries
make things weird.

Oh, my God, he does do that.

I'm like, what,
this ain't Amsterdam!

Yeah, exactly.

Oh, my God, I'm so glad
I got that out.

But mustard though.

- Bomb.
- The best.

- Like, a brown mustard.
- A brown mustard.

- A spicy mustard.
- A spicy...

Like a Dijon is super classy.

Okay, so, I'm thinking
two per bag

and don't forget a toothbrush.

So they can fashion it into
a shiv and stab you with it?

Now with broccoli extract.

Girl. No.

Okay, this is gonna be tough.

I'ma need one of y'all
to wipe me.

Happy Halloween.

Oh, Issa, my client said

they can sell you
the wine wholesale.

So start thinking
of a thank you gift.

Oh, my God. Thank you, Tiffany.

I got a warm case of water
in my trunk.

You'll have to do better.

Okay, well,
this is amazing, guys.

I don't have a headliner yet
but I have a date.

- Hey!
- I have half my vendors

and my swag bags are swaggy.

- I'm killin' it.
- Hey!

- Okay, Issa.
- I'll get more of this.

Let me see
one of them toothbrushes.

That's what the kids gonna do.

Girl, you've got hella work done
with this block party.

Sorry, work's been keeping me
all out the loop.

Oh, girl, I get it. You busy.

- I miss you.
- I know.

But we'll catch up over dinner
this weekend.

Oh, for sure.
And what's the latest

on Asian bae by the way?
Y'all still good?

Asian bae with the samurai dick.

Uh, samurai are Japanese,
racist.

Mm, prove it.

Whatever,
I already heard this story.

Y'all talk.

Okay, I didn't think
this through

and, you know, the hair
is fuckin' with my balance.

Wait, wait,
what's happening? What story?

Y'all fucked already?
What that dick do?

- Or do it don't do?
- Oh, no, it do.

It definitely do.
But it's been almost a month

and I'm just not feeling
close to him.

It's weird. It's all good
sex and witty banter, but...

Hold up, hold up, hold up.
He dicks you down,

makes you laugh,
and he don't work at the airport?

What's the problem?
Because I don't hear it.

He's just not opening up.

And meanwhile,
I'm telling him everything.

I even told him
how I had to wear

a helmet to bed till I was 11.

Are you sure you're not
lookin' for somethin'?

Don't pick up nothin'
that don't serve you, girl.

I'm not. I promise you, I'm not.

So it's just you talking
the whole time?

Basically. And then we fuck.

And I'm not mad at that part
but I just don't want it

to turn into
fuckin' is all we do.

I've been there before
and I want more.

- Yeah.
- I'm with Issa.

Who wants to sit around
and listen to a grown man

talking about his feelings.
You know what I want?

I want me a mime
with a big dick.

I'll be happy as hell.

I gotta find a circus.

But if she has real feelings,

then she needs to let those
skeletons out the closet now.

Tiff might be right.

Andrew and I need to have
some real-ass conversations.

- Mm-hmm.
- I think I'ma have to slow it down.

Mm. You gonna put
that pussy on pause?

Yes, I am.

Okay, girl. Mute that monkey.

The kids are here. Derek!

Derek, put on your cape!

Kelli: Don't help her,
she gotta learn.

Uh-uh, she gotta learn.
She gonna have to learn.

That's the first step
of motherhood.

She's pregnant with a baby,
I'm pregnant with ideas,

but y'all ain't help me up.

Your ideas are trash, Kelli.

Issa: Oh, my god, oh.

It's uncomfortable but it's,
like, good uncomfortable.

- Oh, yeah?
- Oh.

Ooh, this is different.

- Uh-huh.
- Oh.

I've been so stressed,
and you been working that shit out.

- Yeah, ain't I?
- Oh, I'm about to come.

Uh-huh.

- Uh-huh.
- Oh, my God.

- Uh-huh.
- Oh!

Oh, shit. Oh.

- You good?
- Yes.

Calvin: Uh-huh.

I'm great at fuckin', ain't I?

Okay, all right.

Do that, do that thing again.

Do what thing?

Press my booty button.

- Oh, okay.
- Okay.

- Okay, there you go.
- Right there?

Warming up. You warm? You hot?

- Hold it, hold it.
- What?

Hold it, hold it.

Oh, yeah, oh, oh!

Oh, okay, hold it. Oh, shit!

Oh.

Oh, shit.

- That was great.
- Yeah, that was...

Wow.

- Uh-oh.
- What?

The condom was on. Now it ain't.

- What the fuck?
- I don't know.

Where the fuck is it?
You check that side?

- Check that side.
- Don't panic, don't panic.

- Need any help?
- No.

- You sure?
- Yep.

I'm not mad,
I'm just disappointed.

Me too, girl.
We better than this.

Yeah, bitch!

Huh, middle of the day call.

Can't stop thinking about me,
huh?

Are you done?
I just had a minute

and wanted to see what
you were doing on Friday.

Ooh, Summer Walker's
gonna be at The Novo.

- We should go.
- No, I was hoping

we could do something
a little bit more low-key.

We can't really talk there.

We could.
We could be those people.

I hate those people.

Why don't you come over
and we can just have a night in?

Okay, I'll bring the wine.

Cool, now get back to work
and stop sweatin' me, damn.

Oh, hey, Taurean,
Malcolm wanted us to get familiar

with the NewCo discovery.
You staying late?

Uh, it's gonna have to wait.
I'm going out of town.

- Oh, where to?
- Cabo.

Oh, my God,
I was just there last year.

You should go to this place
that had killer...

My hotel's all inclusive,
thanks.

Oh, all-in-one.
That's what's up.

Mm-hmm. I mean, it's like
family friendly and what not.

Drinks, food. Yeah, I get it.

Lawrence: Have you been
watching Looking for Latoya?

These white cops
aren't even looking for her.

I know, right?

- You think she's still alive?
- Mm-mm.

I think that
the boyfriend did it.

How you gonna be
kinda together for five years?

Yeah, never trust a dude
with two dead teeth.

Hey, excuse me,
can I get some mayo?

What?

You still laughing about
Looking for Latoya?

No, I just...

Issa and I were literally just

laughing about this
the other day.

Your whole
mayo with fries thing.

Oh. Wait, what?

Y'all were talkin' about me?

So, so, so, so, so
what else did y'all say?

Nothing.
I mean, we talked about you

but it wasn't anything bad.

Like, I didn't know that
you ran track in college.

Yeah, for like, a year.

So how did that come up?

Is this uncomfortable?

I made this uncomfortable.

Uncomfortable. What, no.

I'm good, I'm just killing
this branzino, bro.

It's just, mmm.

Well, I promise that we weren't

really talking about you
like that.

It's just that things have
been weird between Issa and me

and joking about it
somehow made it better.

Oh, for sure,
for sure, for sure.

Are you okay?

Hell the fuck no I'm not okay.

I don't like this. Condola
talking to old girl about you.

They gonna start a podcast
about your dick.

The fuck outta here, man.
Shut it down.

You didn't get the
cauliflower crust?

- Mm-mm.
- Come on, man.

I don't know,
I would just let it slide.

If you make a big deal out of it,
it'll just get worse.

They'll end up bonding over you
being all sensitive.

That's a smart nigga.
I used to be that fast.

Then I got swole.

You startin' to look like a box.

Thanks, bro.

All right, Derek,
so would you be cool with this shit?

- Fuck no.
- Exactly.

But this shit
wouldn't happen to me

because I keep my shit tight.

Every time I break up
with a girl, I move.

I miss Dallas.

'Rence, 'Rence, 'Rence.
I tried to tell you.

Tell me what, nigga?

About peeing in the pool
you swim in.

If you gonna pick up
a chick at a baby shower,

make sure she's a caterer.

Grab your ass a canape,
the digits, and dip.

All right, well, what if
I just texted Issa

and ask her to chill?

Eh, might come across
kind of harsh in a text.

All right, how about
a bitmoji of me saying

keep my name out your mouth?

Nah, you don't
wanna start texting.

Old girl take your shit
out of context

and send you some titties.

All of a sudden,
you got a paper trail.

It'll blow up your
whole shit with Condola.

Condola come to me
because she all sad.

I gotta put it on her.
Now Leah mad.

Man, shut the fuck up.

All right, so I can't seem
sensitive to Condola,

and I can't seem petty to Issa.

Fuck am I supposed to do?

Whatever you do,

I think you gotta be
up front about it.

- Look at all this gluten.
- It's oil.

- It's gluten.
- Just eat it.

I'm not paying for it.

You really do look like a box.

That's why I'm carb loading.
I carb load during the daytime,

and then I go
for a run at night.

Then I can carb load
again in the daytime.

Condola: I listened
to that playlist you sent

and ScHoolboy Q is gonna
be an amazing headliner.

Now I can't wait
for the concert tomorrow.

Me neither.

And I'm gonna try to
get there early tomorrow

so I can talk to his people.

And I'ma wear
my business Chucks.

Your business Chucks.

I have to.
They always make an impression.

Condola: I'm sure they do.

If ScHoolboy Q says yes,
he gonna be my ScHoolboy Boo.

Hey!

- What's happening?
- That was great.

- Is this some kind of work date?
- Oh, we're just finished.

- Yeah, yeah.
- I'm gonna run now.

I need to get something to eat.
I'm starving.

Oh, yeah. Is this your purse?

- Oh, thank you.
- Yeah.

Girl, why don't you just
stay here and eat with us?

Have you had the salmon droptop?
It makes me want to drop my top.

But I won't.

I don't wanna impose
on your plans.

Impose on what?

We just gonna be talking
the same old shit.

Just add your shit to our shit.

You sure?

Oh, yeah.

Cool, fun.

- Yay, fun.
- Okay.

Thank you, um,
I'm just gonna run to the restroom.

- I'll be right back.
- Cool.

- Perfect.
- Hey, I thought

it was just gonna be
the two of us.

Oh, well, she said
she was hungry

and I didn't wanna be rude.

Yeah, but I really
wanted to talk to you

and I don't know
Condola like that.

Well, this is the perfect
opportunity to get to know her.

Look at God.

You want me to tell her
to leave?

No, no, of course not.
It's, it's cool.

Then how about we talk
at our next Self Care Sunday?

Ooh, we could get ice cream
after our hike.

That totally undoes the hike.

But yes.

Have you seen the dessert menu?
Yay, beignets.

Are you a mind-reader?

I was literally
talking about dessert.

- Yes, beignets.
- I'm excited.

Ooh, Nutella. That's Italian.

Choco-waffle, though.

- Can I...
- Oh, yeah, sure, sure, sure, sure.

Oh, I know what I'm getting.

Oh, thank you.

Hey.

Hey, nice place.

Thanks, it's pretty chill.

How you doin'?

Little Benjamin: Hey,
y'all wanna buy some chocolate?

It's for the homeless.

- Is it?
- Uh-uh.

Got it.

Y'all taking too long.
I'm finna go find a rabbit.

- Y'all got a rabbit?
- I guess so.

Blame his mama.

So what's up?

Look, I know that you
and Condola are friends

and honestly, y'all should do
y'alls thing or whatever.

But...

maybe I don't have to come up
in you guys' conversation.

Oh.

Right, we, we...
I mean, we talked about you,

but we didn't like,
talk about you, I promise.

We just kind of needed to
call it out to let it go.

Yeah, cool, cool.

'Cause, you know, I just want
her to get to know me through me

and I like her and, you know,
I want it to work out.

Yeah, she's great.
I love Condola.

Condola, Condola!

- Condola!
- Yeah?

Okay, I'm finished.

Well thank you.

Sure.
So I shouldn't tell her that

Lawrence is actually
your middle name?

Yeah, nobody needs
to know about Martin.

Whassup?

It's open.

And she cooks? Oh, shit.

Listen, my gumbo is bomb.
I throw down.

Or throw out, 'cause low-key,

this is the third roux
I've made.

Why you gotta stir it so much?

- What you doing?
- Throwing down.

Yeah, well, that's not
on the menu.

Oh, so it's not gumbo and chill.

Yeah, I was thinking more like
chill and chill.

You know, like we eat,
we go sit down and just talk.

Oh, that's real chill.

- You're in charge.
- I know.

- You want a taste?
- Yeah.

- Yeah.
- Let me taste it.

- The gumbo.
- That's...

- Okay, relax.
- What I was talking about.

Yeah.

Mmm. Mm-hmm, mm-mm.

There's too much salt.

I'm black, I got about eight
uncles that have hypertension.

I know when something has
too much salt in it, okay?

Okay.

I ain't makin' another roux.
We just gonna have to die.

What you don't see
is the full-on meltdown

that happened when
we were about to leave.

Disney's a hell of a drive.

- Hey, which one's Curtis?
- On the left.

The one clutching a churro
like it's his job.

Oh, you guys grew up in Gardena.

So I'm sure y'all were
always at Disneyland.

Eh, no, we never went.

Me and my brother always
wanted to go,

but my sister wasn't really
good with crowds.

- Really? Why?
- Just 'cause.

- Well, where is she now?
- We're not really sure.

You don't know where
your sister lives.

I don't really
want to get into it.

Hey, listen, it's okay.

- You can tell me.
- Mm-hmm.

Hey, we can still make it
to the show if you wanna go.

Okay, well, you can go if
that's where you'd rather be.

Wait, wait, wait,
what did I miss?

Honestly, I'm just...

just a little frustrated.

Um, I feel like you're...

you don't wanna talk to me
about your work stuff

or your family.

I-I just feel like you don't
really wanna let me in.

Based on this one conversation?

I just feel like
it's just all jokes

and shit talking with us.

Okay, is this because
we haven't...

put a label on this or anything?

No, it's because
I want to date a guy

who doesn't avoid being real.

Like, I wanna date a guy
with depth.

Wow. Everything
is an issue with you.

I'm gonna catch the show.

We have put as many
resources as we can

towards finding Toyota.

We put her photo
all around the city.

Mm-mm, that's a car. Mm-mm.

- Hey.
- Hey, you got a minute?

- Yeah, what's up?
- Just real quick,

I'm about to see Condola soon,

and just so
I don't fuck up again,

does she know we met up?

And should I
say something or nah?

Nah.

I don't think so.
It's not that deep.

Yeah, that's what
I thought too. Cool.

So how are you?

- We can just hang up.
- Yeah, me too, bye.

Reporter:
It's been almost two months

and the cops
still have no leads.

They never find us.

Taurean, where are we
on the FoodTime case?

Our biggest hurdle
is classifying

whether drivers for FoodTime
are actual employees

or whether or not they're
independent contractors.

Cynthia: What about looking at

the contractual relationship
with its drivers?

Meaning did they have
the right to control

the manner in which
the meals are delivered.

Well, gig economy is tricky.

At first, I thought because
our plaintiff's only job

was delivering for FoodTime,

and because he was paid hourly
rather than per delivery

that it could present a problem.

But then, I realized that
the Sampson decision

provides precedent in our favor.

Molly, did you have
something to add?

No, no, no, no, no.
I, I agree with Taurean.

No, I just thought
I saw a window washer.

That is a dangerous job.

Okay, great, moving on
to the Marshall case.

What's the latest?

- You busy?
- Oh, no, of course not.

Come in.

Oh. We closing doors now.

So I mentioned the Sampson
decision in the meeting

and I saw that
they were an MJ&S client.

Are you familiar with them?

Yeah, they were there
when I was there.

So why didn't you say anything?

There was nothing to say.

You know, I've pulled
employee data

instead of going through
the court docket

which could save you some time,
but you know, there's no wrong way.

It's up to you.

So you were just gonna
let me waste my time?

No, I didn't want
to be negative.

Molly, agreeing with me,
complimenting me,

trying to be my travel agent.

I don't need you to do
all those things.

If you've got something
to say, just say it.

Okay.

Look, I'm not proud
of the way I handled

the Metra case with you.

I wasn't being a team player
and I apologize.

I'd like for us
to get along, but...

I know it'll probably
take some time.

All right.

So you don't wanna
close my door?

Hell yeah, I've heard
of boneless babies.

That shit is real.

Molly: Girl,
that's what I've been sayin'.

I'ma call Jerome tonight.

Oh, hey, listen.

You hear that?

Is she okay?
What's wrong with her?

- She's fine.
- That's my headliner.

See, the universe knows
what's up, man.

So wait, you found somebody?
That's awesome.

- Congratulations.
- Thank you.

You should take me out
to celebrate.

Andrew can come too,
but he gotta pay.

Eh, maybe.

Oh, 'cause the pussy
still on pause?

- I peep the discipline.
- Girl, not really.

He came over the other night,
I tried to get him to open up,

but pfft!
That went all the way left.

He just walked out,
so I don't know.

Damn, girl.

- What?
- No, nothing.

- Say it.
- Nothing!

It seems like you always
findin' a problem.

Sometimes, I'm like,
do you wanna be happy?

I'm sorry, I just...

Aren't you tired?
Because I'm tired for you.

I told you
I wasn't gonna say nothing.

But here you go,
making me say something.

Hold on one second.

Um...

I got to take this.
I'll catch up.

- Hello?
- Hey.

You got a second?

Uh, yeah, I'm hiking. What's up?

I'm sorry about the other night.

Me too, you know,
and if I was pressing too hard,

- or just doing too much...
- Oh, no, no, you weren't.

That night, I was thinking
I don't want to bore you with it

but honestly...

it's just hard for me to
let someone in like that.

But you called me on it, and
it just might take some time.

I got time.

Cool.

- Get away!
- Um...

Stop!

Yeah, I gotta get back to Issa.

She's in a fight
with a gnat right now.

Cool?

- Girl, did you see that?
- Yeah, I saw.

Who was that?

Uh, just, just some work shit.

You stay working.

Good call on this place
for Self Care Sunday.

- Love this view.
- Me too.

Oh, bitch,
I had to end it with TSA bae.

- Yeah?
- Yeah, girl.

Plan B was becoming my Plan A,

and you know what
did not serve me?

Fucking a nigga with two kids
and a third one on the way.

But I'm proud of me low-key
'cause it was hard

to let him go to be honest

'cause that dick
was thick, okay?

Thick.

How many of these
do you usually use?

About 12.

Do you think you need that many?
'Cause I avacadon't.

- You need to upgrade your shit.
- She doesn't care about that.

That girl got you on a path
and everything.

It's just a Friendsgiving,
calm down.

Everybody knows not to miss
a Condola joint.

She's party Spike Lee.

We eatin', bitch!

The wait is an hour, though.
You still goin' to Molly's?

Yeah, I'll just text her
I'ma be late.

- What's your new man look like?
- Ma.

Is he Korean?

- What y'all doin'?
- Checking out Molly's new guy.

Let me see.

Is he crazy and rich? Oh, shit!