I Dream of Jeannie (1965–1970): Season 5, Episode 24 - Hurricane Jeannie - full transcript

[♪]

[WIND GUSTING]

[THUNDER CRASHING]

Hello?

Hello?

Oh, please,

someone answer.

Hello, NASA?

Uh, this is Jeannie Nelson.
May I speak to Major Anthony...?

Uh, what?

Oh, well, I do not know.



This phone seems to be working.

Oh, yes, please, may I speak
to Major Anthony Nelson?

He what?

He left already?

Oh. Thank you very much.

[CLICKS TONGUE]

Ooh. Oh, dear,

it is not safe to be out
in a storm like this.

I am sorry, master,
but you belong at home.

[WIND GUSTING]

Oh.

Oh. Thank heavens you're safe.
Don't... Don't touch me.

I'm sopping wet, darling.

Hey, that's some blow out there.



My car broke down
three blocks away.

Well, the first thing we must do

is get you out of those
wet clothes and into a hot tub.

Yeah.
Well, I called NASA,

and when they said you were
not there, I got so worried.

Well, I'm gonna be there
in 10 minutes.

That's what I was looking for.
You are not going out again.

Sweetheart, this hurricane

is right over
the primary recovery area.

I've got to talk down
Mattingly and Forbes.

Look, my car's broken down.
Dr. Bellows is waiting for me.

If the storm gets any worse,

I'm gonna be staying at NASA,

okay?
But, darling, your clothes.

I don't have time to
change, sweetheart.

I just don't have time.

[GASPS]
[GROAN]

[THUNDER CRASHING]

Oh.
You all right?

Oh, Major Nelson,
there's no use...

Major Nelson,
what are you wearing?

Huh? Oh.

Oh, the lights.

Uh... Uh... Uh,
power failure, sir.

Oh, it is
all right. I can...

No. I don't want you
to do anything.

Go light some candles.

No need to snap, major.

I'm sorry, sir. I...
I guess I'm just, uh, nervous.

You know, with Mattingly
and Forbes up there,

I'm gonna have to
talk 'em down. I...

Uh. I'm just
nervous, that's all.

Oh. Oh.

[MAGIC BOINGS]

Then why, may I ask, are you
lounging around in a bathrobe

when we've got to get
to the base?

Oh, well, uh, I'll
change right away, sir.

Jeannie insisted that I change
into some dry clothes.

You know how wives
are about that,

so, uh, that's why I put
this bathrobe on.

I see.

[THUNDER CRASHING]

Oh.

[♪]

[♪]

[♪]

Put this on, Dr. Bellows.

I shall make some hot soup.

Oh, thank you, Jeannie.

This looks like the one
you were wearing, major.

When was that, sir?

When I came in,
you were standing there...

It's amazing what an electrical
storm can do to your perception.

I think you'd better come
in here and use my bathroom

before you get a chill.
Just go right in there, sir.

Uh, thank you.
Yes, sir.

[THUNDER CRASHING]

Now, Jeannie,
it looks like Dr. Bellows is

gonna be marooned here
until after the hurricane.

Oh. Well, that is fine. He...
He can sleep up in the study.

Good. Good. Now, I-I know
I don't have to say this,

but no tricks, huh?

Oh, no, darling.
Of course not.

Good.

See. Now, look, this is
exactly what I mean.

What?
There's a power failure.

Would you turn the lights off?

Oh, the lights.
Oh, but darling...

Turn 'em off. Really.

Uh, you know, it just
doesn't make any sense.

Thank you. Thanks.

[THUNDER CRASHES]

Turn 'em on, please.

Oh, darling. Oh.

Just turn them off.

But darling, you... I know. Just go ahead.
Turn 'em off.

[EXASPERATED SIGH]

Thank you.

[THUNDER CRASHES] Agh!

[GASPS] Shh!

[♪]

[MUTTERING INAUDIBLY]

[WIND GUSTING]

Whoo! Whoo!

Roge, hey, what are you
doing here?

I'm on my way to Miami.

What? How?

How? By blink.

With the most beautiful girl
in all of Florida.

And what a break with this storm.
Yeah.

No lights.
Can you imagine this?

She won't be able
to send me home. Ha-ha.

All Jeannie has to do is
get me to Miami. That's all.

And, uh... Uh, how do you propose
that Jeannie do that?

Oh, uh, how do I...?
How do I propose that, sir?

Oh, uh, well, Jeannie has
a connection with the, uh...

With the travel bureau.
Oh, don't be ridiculous.

For all practical purposes,
we're marooned right here.

Come to think of it, Major
Healey, how did you get here?

It was fine when
I left home, sir.

But all of a sudden I went
driving down the street,

and they got these big trees in
there, and everything's flooded.

It's really awful.

How we gonna get to NASA, sir?

Well, we'll call.

Well, sooner or later
they may send out

some sort of, uh,
amphibious vehicle.

Yeah, I heard on my car radio

that all the telephones are
definitely out of order, sir.

Oh.
[PHONE BEING DIALED]

Ah... Uh, Jeannie, darling,
the phones aren't working.

Hello, Mrs. Bellows.
This is Jeannie.

Oh, yes. I just thought
you might be worried,

and I wanted to let you know

that Dr. Bellows
is here and safe.

Would you like to
talk to him? Here.

B... B-but how...?

I don't know, sir.

The phone company's
always been a mystery to me.

Amanda?

Yeah, but the main thing, Steve,

is to keep them
absolutely current

on what's happening down here.

Oh, don't try to
keep anything from 'em.

Don't sound like you're trying
to keep anything from them.

Delicious soup, Jeannie.

Don't make things sound
better than they are.

It certainly warms you up.
Thank you, Dr. Bellows.

Tsk. But I do not understand
what Anthony is doing.

Well, Tony's supposed to talk
Mattingly and Forbes down.

BELLOWS: I know I shouldn't
question good luck,

but I still don't understand
why your phone

is the only phone in the area
that's working.

[SPOON CLACKS LOUDLY]

Um. I, uh...
Oh, here it is.

I shall clear the dishes
and bring the next course.

Good. I'll give you
a hand, Jeannie.

Thank you,
Dr. Bellows.

[WIND GUSTING]

I said, have you got
the oxygen remaining times

relative to the recovery
contingencies three and four?

I hope you like lamb,
Dr. Bellows.

Oh, anything's fine, Jeannie.

I love lamb.

Uh, Jeannie, your stove.

Yes. Yes. Heh.
Is something the matter?

It's electric.

Oh, yes.

Is that bad?

It's not bad.
It's impossible.

There's no electricity.

Oh.

[THUNDER CRASHING]

TONY:
Okay. That's right.

Yeah. Yeah.
Okay.

Major Nelson. Your stove...

Uh, generator, sir.
The emergency generator.

Hold on, Steve.

How did you know
what I was going to say?

What were you gonna say?

Why is your electric
stove working?

Uh, it's an emergency generator,
just like we have at NASA.

Yeah, go ahead, Jim.

Well, uh...

major, why aren't
the lights working?

Oh. Don't ask me, sir.

It's not my house.

Uh. Different circuit, sir.

Oh, yeah.

Well, you see, the generator
is for the stove.

It's better to eat
what you're seeing

than see what you're eating.

JEANNIE:
Uh, Dr. Bellows...

Dr. Bellows, you've said that
Anthony was very important

to those two brave men
up in the capsule.

Now, do you not think it is more
important to worry about them

than about a silly,
little-old electric stove,

and whether it works
or doesn't work?

But that's not the point.
It's simply impossible.

Well, of course, Jeannie.
You're right.

Oh, forgive me, major.

Uh, I guess this business
has us all on edge.

Uh, it's perfectly
understandable, sir.

But this is
the most puzzling house.

First the lights, then
the phone, then the stove.

Would you like some coffee, sir?

Ooh. Oh, it's
really hot.

In an electric coffee pot?

[THUNDER CRASHES]

Dr. Bellows,
do you like a hard bed?

Yes. As a matter
of fact, I do, major.

Uh, good. Why don't you
take the couch?

The bed's a little mushy.

Master. Shall I
stay up with you?

No, darling. You better
get some sleep.

Somebody's got to have energy
in the morning

to take care of
Dr. Bellows and Roger.

All right.
I love you.

Mm. I love you too.

Oh.

[♪]

[THUNDER CRASHES] Yes.

Yeah, well, they know they
have to conserve their oxygen.

Yeah. Just, uh, t...

Tell 'em to, uh...
To think of that...

That conscious relaxation
exercise we used to try.

[YAWNS] Yeah, you know the one.

You know the one where you
relax your toes?

Ah. And the feet relax.

The legs relax...

[THUNDER CRASHES]

Yeah. Hello? Yeah, I...

Yeah, I know. I almost
fell asleep myself.

Yeah, well tell 'em
to try that one.

Okay.

[YAWNS]

[THUNDER CRASHES]

All right, Steve.

Now, look,
this is the last contact

we're gonna have, see.

And when they burn through...

[YAWNS]

We're gonna lose
all radio contact with 'em.

And, uh, hm...

Oh. My poor master.

You must get some sleep.

Oh. Oh, I can't,
Jeannie.

I... I can't right now.

Oh, but you must.

You have been awake
so many hours,

you are going to
make yourself sick.

TONY:
I can't get any sleep

until I talk Mattingly
and Forbes down.

Well, I cannot stand by and
watch you make yourself sick.

I-I... I just simply
cannot stand it.

What are you gonna do?

JEANNIE:
There you are, master.

Now you can see.
They are safe.

Uh. Jeannie.
What did you do?

Well, I brought them down,
master, so that you could see

that they are safe.
And now you can get some sleep.

Well, you get 'em
right back up in that capsule.

But, master,
I brought them dow...

Well, you get... They're
gonna make a reentry

in about 30 seconds.

Now get 'em back
up there right now.

Come on.
Yes. Y-yes, master.

Well, do it.
Huh?

Thanks. Now, you get
back into your...

Into your bed, will you?

JEANNIE:
Yes, master.

TONY: Oh. Come on.
JEANNIE: I love you.

I love you too, sweetheart.

Go on, go on.
Good night.

Good night.

[THUNDER CRASHES]

Hello, Steve.
Are you there?

Major Nelson.

[♪]

Dr. Bellows.

Did you see the...

[♪]

All of it.

All of it.

Jeannie... She folded her arms,
and then...

And then she...

She blinked her eyes and...

And suddenly they...
They were here.

They were sitting...

right here.

And then she...
She blinked them again...

and they were gone.

And then she blinked her eyes
a third time,

and then she was gone.

Major Nelson, what in the name

of heaven's going on here?

You're asleep.
That's what's going on.

You're asleep.
You're dreaming.

When you wake up in the morning,

you're not gonna
remember anything.

No. Nonsense.
I've been...

No, no. I, uh...

I've been up all night.

I've been worrying about
Mattingly and Forbes.

I haven't... I haven't
slept a wink.

Yeah.
Not a wink.

Major.
Why did she wink?

Uh, wink?
Yeah.

No, a blink.
I mean...

Uh, you used hypnosis.
You hypnotized yourself.

No, no, no.
That's ridiculous.

I'm as awake as you are.

It was an experiment
I was conducting here.

While you've been
on the phone all this time?

No, it's out of the...
It's... It's all nonsense.

Nonsense.
A mirage?

The truth!

I saw it and I want the truth.

And while you're at it,

you can tell me all that's
going on in this house.

The truth about that phone,

the lights, the stove.
Everything!

Uh, you'd better
brace yourself, sir,

because the truth is
rather startling.

Try me.

Well...

Try me!

I married a genie.

[LAUGHS]
[THUNDER CRASHES]

You never quit.
Do you, major?

You don't believe me?

Wait. What's going on
down here anyway?

Uh, Major Healey,
I think you'd better sit down.

Yeah.
I just got up, sir.

I'm afraid you're in
for quite a shock.

Shock.

A very big shock.

Major Nelson just told me

that he was married...

to a genie.
Mm-hm.

[THUNDER CRASHES]

Oh, uh...
Oh, well, you, uh...

You must be dreaming, sir.
I tried that.

Yeah, you tried that.
Oh, well, it's probably...

Probably some kind of
self-hypnosis, sir.

I tried that.

Uh, well, it's an experiment.

That's it. [LAUGHS] No.

Have you tried mirage?

Roger, he caught me
red-handed.

I had to tell him the truth.

Did he believe it?

The question is not
whether I believe it,

but does...

Major Nelson believe it?

Well, I...

I believe anything
you two believe.

Good night.

Roger, don't leave me here.
Uh, uh.

Now, I just want you to relax.

Now, you try to remember
that I'm your friend,

and I'm trying
to help you, major.

Yes, sir.
Uh, ahem.

Your health is
far more important

than any explanation, major.

You see, we have, uh...
We have ways of dealing with

psychoses such as yours.

In a few years
of rest and quiet...

depth analysis.

Jeannie! Jeannie!

Oh. Yes, Anthony.
Here.

Did you call?

I want you to smoke
into your bottle.

What?
Smoke into your bottle.

[SHOUTS] What?!

Oh. Well.
Well, he...

He is asleep.

He is so sleepy, he does not
know what he is saying.

Uh, Jeannie, it...
It's all right.

Uh, I'm your master.
Smoke into your bottle.

Ah. Darling.

[WHISPERS]
Dr. Bellows.

Just do as I say.

I'm asleep. That's...

That is what it is.

I... I am asleep.

I am asleep.

[♪]

Jeannie?

Yes, Anthony.

You called?

Yeah, I... I was trying
to show Dr. Bellows

that you're really a genie.
You can come out.

Yes, Anthony.
That...

That is my name.
Jeannie.

It's all right, major.

You've made your point.

I'll, uh...

I'll resign my commission
immediately,

of course.
I...

Commit myself for treatment...

while I still have a few
lucid moments left, and...

BELLOWS:
Shame, really. I...

I like the Air Force.
I like...

being a psychiatrist.

Oh. The poor man.

[CLEARS THROAT]

Uh, sir, all you have
to do is realize

that there is such a thing
as a genie in the world.

Of course, it'll...

be difficult
to tell Amanda, but...

she'll understand.

She'll, uh, wait for me.

Dr. Bellows. Uh...

Um, Jeannie, do you remember

that stereopticon
we used to use?

You mean the past
and future machine?

Yes. Yeah. Would you
blink it in, please?

Oh.

Ha.

Uh, there, sir. Uh, this will
probably clear things up.

Just... T-take
a look in here.

Oh, yes.

Uh.

[♪]

Major Nelson. Where did
all this come from?

Uh, this bed, those pillows,

the... These curtains.

Hello, Dr. Bellows.

[SCREAMS]

Major Nelson, please.
Look at me!

Look at my uniform!

BELLOWS: What's the matter with you?
What is that?

Oh, a-a-a-a...
A mosquito netting, sir.

Malaria prevention.

BELLOWS: Mosquito netting?
TONY: Yeah.

BELLOWS: Malaria prevention?
TONY: Absolutely.

Oh, I wish you'd be
more careful. Look at this.

[SCREAMS]

What was that?
Huh? A mosquito bite.

Very painful, sir.
The whole room is full of 'em.

Hold still.
Hold still, sir.

One right there.

Ow! What's the mat...

The whole room is full of them.

It must be full.
I can hear them.

Give me some of this.
Huh? No.

Give me. Give me!
[BUZZING]

Oh. Oh!

Oh!

You mean to tell me

that was all Jeannie?

Yes, sir.
All. All.

And she really does
live in this bottle?

No!

Huh? No, it's
all right, darling.

I'm trying to convince him.

Let him look in there.
Uh, but...

It's all right.

Oh!
Ah!

TONY:
Shh, shh.

Oh.
It's all right.

Now, look, darling,
we're married.

We don't need
the bottle anymore.

[SOBBING] Oh... That's okay.

Uh, sir, would you like to
take another look in there?

Of course. I...

I can hardly wait.

[♪] Uh...

♪ Way, hey Blow the man down ♪

[SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY]

Ahoy, there!
Come aboard, major.

What?

Come out of the water.

I beg your pardon?
The water.

Oh.

Did you eat the pipchick, sir?

I certainly did.

Salt air gives you
a marvelous appetite.

Ready to come about.

Come aboard!

Look out for the boom, major.

The what, sir?

The boom!

Oh. Oh, right. Right.

Uh, sir, I... I really think
you ought to come with me.

Come with you? What for?

I'm finally doing something
I've always wanted to do.

Sailing a whaler to Alaska.

Mmm. Looks like
a sou'easter's

blowing up out of the nor'west.

Ah, you gotta watch out
for them sou'easters.

Perhaps we ought to go below

and put on our
foul-weather gear, sir.

Too late for that.

Lower the lifeboats.

[♪]

I'll never be able to look at
myself in the mirror again.

Uh, there was
one particular incident

I remember that...

When your explanation sounded
especially fishy.

You know, the time that I...

I thought I saw
the two Martians.

Uh... Uh, Jeannie,
would you mind?

Go ahead.

I don't understand.

This whole base
should be on red alert.

The president
should've been notified.

Look. Look at this hat.

Now, just calm down, colonel.

Nobody's gonna hurt you.

But, sir. I know it
sounds crazy, but it's true.

I saw them.

Uh, green men with,
um, a... A...

Antennae, colonel?

That's right,
sir. Antennae.

They must've taken over
the jet plate.

Well, there's the jet plate
right now, doctor.

BELLOWS: The gall of them
to come right here to NASA.

[JET PLATE ENGINES WHIRRING]

Oh, no.

They might have vaporizers.

We'll chance it, doctor.

Go on!

You'll see. You'll see.

Hello!

Hello in...
Hello in there.

[SPEAKING SLOWLY]
Uh, we are earthlings.

We like you.

Oh, that's very kind
of you, sir.

We like you too.

Well, doctor?

I must admit, major,
that your explanations were

extraordinarily clever.

I'll resign my commission,
of course, sir.

And Jeannie and I

will go away
where we're not known,

and start life all over again.

What a waste to
the space program.

Well, I'd rather be
married to Jeannie

than be an astronaut, sir.

Oh, Anthony...

Call me "master."

BELLOWS: Jeannie, I always
thought that you were

a charming and wonderful girl.

A perfect wife for Major Nelson.

Magic or no, I...

see no reason why I should
change my opinion.

Thank you,
Dr. Bellows.

Major Nelson,
all things being considered...

and I mean all things

uh, it's been a great honor
and a pleasure working with you.

Uh, good luck.

Thank you, sir.

Uh, excuse me.

You better get some sleep.

[♪]

Good night, darling,
darling Anthony.

Master.

Master.

[♪]

STEVE [ON PHONE]:
Tony? Tony, are you there?

Tony, wake up.
Hm?

What?

Oh. Hello.

They're down, Tony. Down.

Aboard the carrier,
safe and sound.

[LAUGHS] They're down?

You're kidding.
They're down.

[CHUCKLING]
Hey, that's great, Steve.

And they're aboard the carrier?

Hey, that's sensational.

[LAUGHS] We did it, huh?

Okay, buddy.

Yeah, you'd better get
some sleep.

I'll get some too.

Mm, yeah, well, I'm so tired,

I'll probably have
a nightmare now.

[LAUGHS] Okay, bye.

[THUNDER CRASHES]

[SMALL GASP]

[♪]

Where's the bottle?

The bottle was broken.

The machine.

[THUNDER CRASHES]

[LAUGHING] That's what it was.
It was a nightmare.

Hey.

A nightmare. The whole thing
was a nightmare.

Dr. Bellows
and the machine.

[LAUGHING]

Whoo-hoo!

TONY [LAUGHING]:
Whoo-hoo!

Major Nelson, what is it?

Uh... M-Mattingly and Forbes.
They're down.

They're on the carrier.
What? How marvelous.

Yeah.

Oh.

[THUNDER CRASHES]
How about that?

What is all the noise about?

Uh... They're down.
They're safe on the carrier.

Oh! My hero!

Jeannie, Jeannie. Uh, hey,
where did you come from?

Yeah.
Oh. Well, uh...

She's, uh...
From the bedroom, sir.

That's not possible.
I was standing right here.

I'll get Roger.

No, no, no.
He's not up there.

He's not up there.

Where is he?
Roge?

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Wait.
There he is.

At this hour?
Wait a minute.

[THUNDER CRASHES]

Oh. Major Healey,
where are you going?

I'm going to Miami...
with Nancy.

Take a trip.

Blink me in.

Goodbye.
Good night all.

That's quite
an answer. Goodbye.

No, no, no, no.
Not on the couch.

You'll get the couch wet.
Not my bottle.

Wake up.

[♪]