Human Target (2010–2011): Season 2, Episode 11 - Kill Bob - full transcript

# This here's a jam
for all the fellas #

# try to do
what those ladies tell us #

# get shot down
'cause you're overzealous #

# play hard to get #

# females get jealous #

# okay, smarty,
go to a party #

# girls are scantily clad
and showing body #

# a chick walks by #

# you wish you could sex her #

# bustin' another move
like you was poindexter #

# hey #



# oh, oh #

# oh, oh #

# yeah, oh #

# just bust a move #

# oh, hey #

# oh, yeah #

# oh, oh #

# yeah, oh #

# you're on a mission #

# and you're wishin' #

# someone could cure
your lonely condition #

# lookin' for love #

# In all the wrong places #

# no fine girls,
just ugly faces #



Come on!

Bob here says
he has no idea

why anyone would want
to put a hit on him.

Wait, a hit?

You mean
like he was hired?

He didn't just want
to kill me himself?

Well, he's obviously a pro.

He knew your route.

He knew the traffic,
how to get in and out quickly.

It's what
I would've done.

Well, in the abstract.

You sure you didn't
see anything?

Maybe the make
of the motorcycle,

license plate number,
something like that?

No, I told you.
I was ducking.

I was reaching
for my phone.

Thank God my wife
called when she did.

Hey, listen,
I don't want her

to find out
about this, okay?

She'd freak.

I mean, you know,
she's just a schoolteacher.

Yeah, but it's
a slippery slope, believe me.

Ask my ex.

I just don't get it

I'm like the last guy
anyone would want to kill.

Bob, why don't you
have a seat?

And we're gonna figure out
who tried to kill you.

What do you do
for a living?

I write
communication software

for weather satellites.

Where do you do this?

Lendyne.

Lendyne,
the defense contractor?

Well, talk about
burying the lead.

Except nothing I do
is classified,

or even
remotely secretive.

I have the lowest level
clearance possible.

Hey, maybe it was
a drive-by.

I did have rap on
in the car.

Gonna go out
on a limb and say

it has nothing to do
with your gang affiliation.

So what do we do?

We do what we do best.

Blend into your life,
hide in the shadows,

wait for the threat
to reveal itself,

then we hope
someone tries to kill you.

Somebody enlighten me here.

Is this a fun couples
thing to do?

Hell, no.

One thing I don't miss
about married life

is getting dragged
down here every Sunday,

freezin' my ass off,

missin' my 49ers.

Still, actuary tables show

that married people
tend to live longer lives.

Right. Says the guy
who tends

to make people
live shorter lives.

Okay, they're splitting up.

Guerrero,
you and I flank Bob,

Winston, take Angie.

Whoa, whoa, whoa,
hold on a second.

Something here ain't right.
Let me--

Chance, you got eyes
on Angie?

I think she's
heading back to Bob.

Think she's got a gun.

A gun?

Guerrero,
get him outta here.

Hey, dude, got a situation.
Walk that way. Go.

What about my wife?
Aren't you worried about her?

Yeah, more than
you know. Go, go.

Chance, now would be
a good time to do something.

Hey, my fish!

Thanks.

Come on!
Get in!

What happened? Did you
see the assassin?

What'd he look like?

Yeah, looked a lot
like your wife.

Wait. What?

I'm telling you,

There's no way my wife
is trying to kill me.

She loves me. We've
never even had a fight.

That should have
been your first clue.

Oh, my God, it's Angie.

Don't answer it.

Don't think of it.

Hey, Ames.

Where have you been?

Is there something
wrong with your phone?

Um...No.

Mr. Winston, I'm so sorry.
It was all my fault.

We were in Las Vegas.

Vegas?
For what?

Uh...

Mrs. Pucci...

Like to introduce you
to our new client,

Bob Anderson.
Oh, excellent!

Well, it's a pleasure
to meet you, Mr. Anderson.

So what brings you here?

Wife's trying to kill him.

No. No, no, he's wrong.

It's not my wife.

We're very happily married.

Yeah? For how long?

Three years, four months,
two days.

Aw. You know to the day.

That is so sweet.

Yeah, give it
a couple of years.

As someone who's had firsthand
experience on the subject,

I believe that marriage
is a sacred institution,

one that
only a husband and wife

can truly appreciate
and understand.

Thank you.
So you don't think

my wife's
trying to kill me?

Oh, yes, she probably is

if Mr. Chance believes so.

Well, in any event,

you're in very good hands,

so best of luck.

So, Bob,

you want to know
who your wife really is?

Her maiden name
was Schwedak,

at least was before

she married
her first husband.

What? No.

Her maiden name
is Monroe.

Who is that guy?

That's Jim Charles,
her first husband.

It didn't end well.

Oh.

Scotland Yard found his body

floating in the Thames.

He'd been poisoned.

This doesn't
make any sense.

I know this has got to be
overwhelming for you, Bob.

I kind of know
how you feel.

Have you ever been
married, Mr. Chance?

No.

Okay, then you can't
possibly know how I feel.

I've been with Angie
for three years,

and they've been the happiest
three years of my life.

You expect me to believe
it was all just

a lie?

Look, as much as
I would love to root

for the institution
of marriage,

the evidence is here
pretty compelling.

Listen, Bob,
has there been anything

in your wife's behavior
recently

that would make you feel

even remotely suspicious
of her?

No! What are you--

are you guys--

I'm telling you,
we are completely in love.

We're even
supposed to go away

for a romantic
getaway weekend tonight.

Now, do you think
she'd want to do that

if she was trying
to kill me?

Come on.

Best way to find out,
let her try.

Wait. What?

Here's your copy.

Why is he still alive?

Look, if you just
want me to kill him,

I can do it
in his sleep.

But if the point is

to make it look like
somebody else did it--

the point is
we are running out of time.

And if we do not
meet this deadline--

we'll meet the deadline.

Want to take it down
to the truck?

Yeah, hold on.

Trust me.

You and I will be
long gone

by the time
they find his body.

Okay, she's coming out now.

You got anything yet?

No. I can't
hear a thing in there.

Probably using jammers.

If we're gonna find out
what she's up to,

we're gonna have to break in.
Yeah?

Interior doors are
probably alarmed, so...

Yeah, I'll get
the climbing gear.

Seriously?

Yeah, man.

Hey, you gotta do
what you gotta do.

Look, uh, don't know
how to tell you this,

but you rappelling off the side
of a 40-story building is...

Not a good idea.

Oh, so what's this now,
another crack about my size?

Well...

Yeah.

Ames, you're late.

Suit up.

Maybe next time.

Hang on.

Is that
a wedding ring?

What?

No,
course, it's not.

It's on your left hand,

and it's
on your ring finger.

I know what
a wedding ring is.

Wait, that's why
you went to Vegas?

To get married?

No.

Yes.

How do you know?

Told you
you should've invited him.

Hi, Bob.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

You okay?

Me?
Yeah.

Fine. Why?

I don't know.

You just seem
a little jumpy.

Jumpy? No, I'm just,
you know...

I'm just excited
about our trip, you know?

Um, are you ready to go?

Yeah.
Yeah, I'm ready.

Yeah. Can't wait.

All right, you two...

Lovebirds.

You must be Angie.

Heard a lot about you,
all good.

Bob, she's gorgeous.

Uh, Bob,
who is this person?

I'm Larry.
Yeah.

Bob and I
work together.

Not exactly together.
I'm in H.R.

Bob--well,
he's your husband

you know
where he works, right?

Yeah.

Um, Larry's
car broke down.

Yeah, fuel pump,
second time.

Second time.

So his fiancee is supposed
to be at that resort

up near our cabin,

so I...

Offered him a ride.

Bob!

Well, you just gotta
drop me off.

I mean, you won't even
know I'm there.

Won't even know.

- Appreciate it.
- He appreciates it.

Okay, I'm gonna get
the rest of the stuff.

Don't kill me.

We're in.

Fine.

So what's
his name?

Who?

Alejandro.

Oh, of course--Alejandro.

And how long
have you known Alejandro?

A couple of weeks.

Oh, a couple of weeks.

Look, are we really
going to get into this

right here, now?

You're damn right we're gonna
get into it right now.

What's the matter with you?

How could you
marry this guy?

You hardly even know him.

If anybody cares,

they've got some serious
encryption protocols

protecting something
called "Project Graystar."

Turn around,

now.

We might have to take this back
to HQ to decode, dude.

All right, what are you
thinking? CIA, black ops?

No, more like OSA.

Database logbook's
all in Russian.

Which means Bob's wife's is
looking a lot more like a spy.

Poor guy,
he has no idea.

Yeah.
See, that's what happens

when you marry people
you hardly know.

Hang on a second.

Bad guys just pulled up
to the front,

and I believe they're
headed your way.

All right, dude,

I'm streaming encrypted files
to you now.

All right, good, good.

Come on, come on,
come on, come on.

Now how you gonna get out?

Same way we got in.

Got it.
Ames.

Whoa, whoa.
How do we know

the ropes are long enough
to reach the ground?

Only one way
to find out.

Okay. Well, that's
kind of embarrassing.

Just talked
to my fiancee.

Apparently, we're supposed
to meet next weekend.

Yeah, got our signals
crossed a little bit.

What can you do?

Uh, call the inn,
get a room.

Well, listen,
I'll be fine.

I'll sleep
in the truck.

No.
Great.

That's great. Thank you.

Angie, come on,
he'll freeze.

It's not that cold.
He's fine.

Okay, are you sure
this is a good idea?

She seems really pissed.

If we're lucky, maybe she'll try
to take us both out.

Who are you?

Yeah.

We're pretty sure Angie's
a spy, Chance.

Probably OSA.

Her marriage to Bob
is a cover,

and now she doesn't
need him anymore.

What's going on?
What's happening?

What?

We have been breached,

perhaps by CIA.

Did they find anything?
Not sure,

but finish the job

and keep your eyes open
for anything suspicious.

We're headed back
to HQ right now

to try and
decrypt the files,

find out why OSA
wants Bob dead.

So, listen,
watch your back.

For all we know,
she could already be onto you.

Looks like he's
got sat reception too.

What?

Who?

Never mind,
I'll handle it.

Looks like we're in
for an interesting evening.

Ahem.

Oh, hey, Ange,
listen, um...

I've been thinking,
I really feel bad about today,

so maybe Bob just gives me
a ride down the mountain.

- Tomorrow--
- Nonsense.

No, Larry,

you're not
going anywhere.

So, medium,
medium rare, or bloody?

Uh, either.

Why don't you let me
do that for you?

Yeah.

No, it's okay.

- Oh! I'm sorry.
- Oh.

Um, must be the altitude.

How sweet.
Thank you.

Excuse me. Oh.

Excuse me.

Ahem.

Oh, Bob, by the way
the body shop called.

Um, what, uh...
What was that about?

Uh, just a little
fender bender.

Not to worry.

Oh, okay.

Well, just as long
as you're all right.

You know,
this is really great,

and I hope you're not
just doing this for my benefit.

Well, you know,
it's not often

I get to cook for more
than just Bob and I, so...

I didn't want
to miss my chance.

How about a toast?

Salud.

It's Italian.

Salud.

Salud.
And salud.

Mmm!

Kharashow.

Oh, thank you.

Bob?
Yeah?

Now would be a great time
to go get some firewood.

Right now?
I'm eating.

Pass the salt, will you?

Get the firewood, Bob.

Oh-kay.

Getting the firewood.

Nice spread. I thought for sure
you'd be serving borscht.

Talk fast, CIA,
what do you want?

Well, first of all,
I'm not CIA.

Secondly, I think it's
pretty clear what I want.

I want Bob alive.

Then why don't you just
go ahead and shoot me?

Because I don't like
to shoot unarmed women.

Company policy.

Feeling a little light
there, by the way?

Took my clip,
but put my gun back.

Impressive.
Didn't even notice.

Did you?

Nicely done.

Spasiba.

Ahh!

Aah!

Aah!

Oh!

I'm back!

Go!

Go!

This way. Go.

Go!

What the hell are
you doing here?

I told you
I could handle it.

You have said that before.

I am here to make sure.

Yeah, yeah.

Come on, answer.

Damn it, he's not
answering his phone.

We got to figure out

who the hell it is
we're dealing with.

Come on, just forget
about the sequencer.

Have you tried
a backdoor?

Yes, twice. Just chill.

Aren't you going
to answer that?

Hi, honey.

No, I'm still at work.

No, of course I want to talk
to you, and I'm sorry...

I'm ain't getting them
no present.

I don't care.

How you gonna invite

everybody in the office
except me?

Dude, if you haven't figured out
why you weren't invited yet,

give it up.

Alejandro
wanted me to tell you

that he's
got a great picture

of you playing sax
with the band.

Great.

Yeah, military satellites,
I get it.

Why in the hell
would the Russians

be interested
in a weather satellite?

Question is,
what has it got to do

with them wanting
Bob dead?

Whoa! Back up.
What the hell was that?

Dude? Why does the OSA

have a file
on Ilsa's husband?

And who's the babe?

I'm curious...

Shut it down,
shut it down.

Curious about what?

Well, whether
or not Bob's wife

is actually trying to kill him
or not, of course.

Oh.

Why?
Is there something else?

No. What you
talkin' about?

No.

Where are they going?

Exactly where I want them to.

We're pinned!

We're gonna go back to the cabin
and hotwire the truck.

Um, why aren't
we doing that right now?

Because I think that's exactly
what she wants us to do.

I just can't
figure out why.

Unless...

Lift your head up
a little bit.

Are you crazy?
Come on.

Oh, my God, she is
trying to kill me.

Yeah, but she didn't.

Come on.

What are you doing?

Chance, talk to me.

Wow, she's good.

She's really good.

What the hell
are you talking about?

Finish them off.

Good news.
Your wife loves you.

- Come on.
- What?

I'm happy for you, Bob.

Happy for me?

Are you kidding?

My wife tried
to kill me yesterday.

He just means he's happy
you're still alive, Bob.

Uh, no,
he means he's happy

that Bob's wife
still loves him.

Score another win
for matrimony.

Bob, what I'm saying is,

your wife isn't
trying to kill you.

She's trying to make it look
like she's killing you.

Okay, a world-class
assassin like her,

she doesn't miss as often and
as closely as she does with you.

I'm betting that
she rigged the explosives

on the truck to make it look
like you were both killed.

So you think she had
an exit strategy?

I think she still has one.

Even if she wasn't
trying to kill me,

she was still trying
to kill you.

Right.
She's not in love with me.

She's in love with you.

Aw.

Even if that's true,

who could she possibly
be working for

that would make her
want to fake my--her--

our deaths?

Natalia Petrovic?

That's the little woman's
real name.

She was born
in St. Petersburg,

and she graduated
from University of Moscow,

where she was recruited
to the OSA,

a secret branch
of Russian intelligence.

Why would
they want Angie

to marry me
of all people?

Because the encryption code
you were working on

wasn't really
for weather satellites.

According
to our Russian friends,

the code was actually to
protect NSA spy satellites.

So what do we do now?

Call your wife's bosses,

give them what they want.

You--you mean--
you mean me?

Listen, I think the only reason
they wanted to kill you

is because they thought you were
close to finishing the code.

Which they don't
want you to do

because they'd already
hacked into the old one.

Okay, but if I give them
the new code,

they're going
to kill me anyway.

I don't think so.
You see, I think Angie--

Natalia.

Natalia isn't gonna
let that happen.

So you call them,
arrange a meeting,

tell them you want to trade
the code for your life,

see what happens.

See what happens?

You mean put all my trust
into a woman

who's been lying to me
all these years?

That's--that's--

crazy?

Granted, if I'm wrong,
you're probably dead.

There's no denying that.

But if I'm right,

you just might
get Angie back.

Sorry to interrupt.

Dude, you got a second?

Yeah.

Think about it.

So what are
we doing down here?

When we found
that file on Angie,

we also found a file
on Marshall Pucci.

Photo was taken
at a local hotel

two days
before he was killed.

Who's the woman?

You mean
who's the mistress?

Could be something else.

Either way, dude,
not lookin' good.

Okay, let me know
what you find,

but come to me first
with whatever you dig up.

I don't want Ilsa
to worry for no reason.

No reason for me
to worry about what?

We got that
off the hard drive

of a Russian spy agency
we infiltrated.

And may I ask you why you
wouldn't show it to me?

Wanted to
check it out first

before we bothered
you with it.

Bother me?

What if there were others
involved in his killing?

This woman could lead us to
knowing more of the full story.

Or it could lead us
to something else.

Look, Ilsa, I know
this has got to be hard,

but some things are really
better off left alone.

Yes, yes.

I'd imagine
to a person like you

that would seem
to be the case.

A person like me?

A person who's never been
in a relationship

with someone
he actually trusts,

someone who's
always been alone.

While your professional threat
assessment is appreciated,

I would
very much like to know

more about the woman
in this photo.

If I learn anything of import,
I'll be sure to let you know.

Good day.

Okay,
I thought about it.

I'll do it.

Not 'cause I trust Angie.

But, um...

'Cause I trust you.

Good. I'm glad somebody
around here does.

Just give them
the hard drive.

Let us take
care the rest.

Okay, and, if you
don't mind my asking,

what will
that entail, exactly?

It depends...

On your wife's move,
then we go in.

Okay, um,
what's my wife's move?

I'll recognize it
when I see it.

Don't worry. She's not going
to let them hurt you.

Hmm.

Just in case,
neither will we.

Okay, I'm here.

What's so important?

Sit.

Okay.

Isn't that--

it is.

The question is,
who is the woman with him?

This is what you and I

shall endeavor to find out
this afternoon.

Help me.

Been, uh,
reading the manual.

I know, right?

Me, go figure.

Showtime.

Is Angie with them?

Can't tell.

Windows are tinted.

All right, muscle's
getting out now.

Whoa.

Packing
some serious heat.

You are a trusting man, Bob,

coming out here
by yourself.

I admire that.

You did bring the code,
i presume?

I want my wife
back first.

Far be it from me to stand
in the way of romance.

Come to your husband,
Natalia.

Come.

Okay, he gave 'em
the code. Now what?

And this time,
do not miss.

Chance, she's armed!

She's gonna shoot him!

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

Her finger's on the trigger.
Talk to me, Chance.

Nah, it's okay.
She's just playing them.

Are you sure?

Trust me.
She's got a plan.

Uh, dude,

looks like Angie
just shot Bob.

Chance?

Chance!

Easy, Bob. easy.

Just breathe.
Just breathe.

She shot me.

Angie shot me.

Whoa, she really shot him.

Well, I told you.

I'm aware
that she shot him.

I knew it.

This is
perfectly executed.

The bullet
went clean though.

It's less than a centimeter
away from his heart.

She's a pretty good shot,
I'll tell you that.

That's beautiful, man.

What the hell
are you talking about?

Guys, am I going to die?

Bob, you're
gonna fine.

She had to do it,

make them think
you're really dead.

I don't understand.

Because
it's un-understandable!

It's a clean shot,
dude.

He's going to be fine.
She planned it.

She planned it so they
won't keep coming after you.

So that was her move?

Pretty good move.

She loves me.

Angie loves me.

Oh, brother.

Now I gotta go kill her.

At?

Did he say kill her?

I don't know
about this.

We can't count on her
missing on purpose again.

We're not.

Speed up a little bit,
will you?

I don't suppose I can
talk you out of this.

Nope. Hit it!

Angie?

I was worried
I was the only one

who could make that shot.

To tell you the truth,
so was I.

I need a drink.

Ready, Bob?

What happened?
Did they get away?

They got away, Bob.

Did you...

Did you kill Angie?

No, honey, he didn't.

Angie.
Hi.

I love you, Bob.

I love you, too...

Natalia.

So I guess you're
the love expert now.

What, are you
waiting for me

to give you an apology
for doubting you?

Love is never having
to say you're sorry.

Oh, why don't you
shut up?

Even after you shoot
somebody in the chest.

So, uh...

We'll, uh...

Ahem!

We'll alert the NSA
about that code.

Oh.

The one you gave them
will never go operational.

I know.

I never gave it to them.

What?

You didn't give them
the drive?

No, I gave them
the drive.

It was just infected
with a virus,

which means it'll have
corrupted the code by now.

Ballsy. I like it.

That's amazing.

Nice move, Bob.

Not bad.

Listen, I can't thank
you all enough.

I wanted so much
for what you were telling me

about Angie to be true,

and, uh, now I know it is.

Yeah. Our relationship may
have started out a lie,

but, um,
it became very real.

Yeah.

Normally,
it's the other way around.

I think what Winston
meant was,

it's not
the lack of love,

but the, uh,
lack of friendship

that makes for
an unhappy marriage.

Did you make that up?

Nietzsche.

I take it this means
the mission was a success?

Oh, absolutely.

My faith in the institution
of marriage

has just been
officially renewed.

Well, good.

I'm glad
we could be of service,

and I wish you both
the best of luck.

Thank you.
Thank you.

Listen,
on the subject of luck,

you guys are going to need
all you can get

to stay alive.

By now, Ivan knows
he doesn't have the code,

and he's probably
not gonna forget that.

Yeah,
it's not a problem.

We have an exit plan.

Uh, we do?

Of course.

Every good spy has one.

Although, um,

we could use your assistance
on a few things.

All right.

Any preference
on your new names?

Winston?

Hmm?

I'm really sorry.

I should have invited you
to the wedding,

but...

I knew you'd think
it was a mistake.

Let me tell you something.

Ah, what the hell.

Ain't like my marriage
turned out that great.

What the hell do I know?

A lot, apparently.

Alejandro and I are
getting an annulment.

I mean,
he is great and all,

but you were right.

I hardly
even know the guy.

Plus, I'm totally not suited
to be with a Pisces.

I mean, I'm a Scorpio.
What was I thinking?

I know, I know...

I wasn't.

I just wanted to apologize

for not telling you
about the photo.

I didn't want you to have
to endure anything else,

considering what
you've already been through.

Apology accepted.

But you should know

that there's nothing
more important to me

than making sure that
there's no one else out there

who could have played a role
in Marshall's death.

I understand.

I don't think you do.

Yeah, you mentioned that.

I'm sorry. I don't mean
to sound so harsh.

But?

I don't think you've
ever been in love.

And that makes
all the difference.

Just want to say
I hope you guys

have a wonderful life
together.

Thanks, Chance.
Thanks.

You have no idea
what this means to us.

Welcome aboard,
Mr. and Mrs. Schneider.

Uh, Schneider?

How many identities
do you have?

Does it matter,
sweetheart?

Ya liubliu tebia.

It means "I love you."