House of Lies (2012–2016): Season 5, Episode 1 - Creative Destruction Phenomenon - full transcript

- Previously, on House of Lies...
- [screaming]

[Marty] There's an 87% likelihood

- that we're gonna sleep together, so...
- Ha!

- [Marty] To the blower-uppers.
- [whooping]

[Doug] Right now we're at five to one.

- You guys did it.
- [Marty] I love you.

[Marty] We're the team from Galweather.

[Skip] Other people do what you do

without leaving a swath of destruction.

[Marty] Skip Galweather really
wants me out of the business?

- Let's push his ass out.
- What the hell are you doing?



[Skip] Just leaving
you a little present.

You ripped away my name from me!

I'm gonna start my own shop.

[whooping, laughing]

What if I could deliver some

- incriminating financial record?
- Absolutely.

[Marty] Who the fuck let
the Feds in on this thing

- in the first place?
- I told her about the books.

- I had a good thing going.
- [Marty] We need to just

get through this transition,
and then you should leave.

Marty, I'm pregnant.

You're having another kid.

You don't even acknowledge it.

[Jeannie] I really want to stay.



That's not... I mean, no.

Who's gonna do all your work?

And ethically questionable
flirting with clients?

I'm gonna miss you, too, Clyde.

Word on the street was that you

were looking for a new position.

The CFO position?

I'm going to offer it to you.

I took the job

at Davis/Dexter.

- [Jeannie] All I want...
- [Marty] Is what?

You.

♪ Well, I'm a king bee ♪

[blues beat plays]

♪ Buzzing around your hive ♪

Mine!

[harmonica playing]

Mine.

♪ Well, I can ♪

- ♪ Make honey, baby ♪
- Mine.

♪ Let me ♪

- ♪ Come inside ♪
- [exhales] Mine...

Oh...

Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine.

- ♪ I'm young and able ♪
- Mmm... mwa!

Mine, mine...

♪ To buzz all night long ♪

[engine revs]

- ♪ I'm young and able ♪
- Mine...

[revs engine]

♪ To buzz all night long ♪

♪ Well, when you hear me buzzin', baby ♪

♪ Some stingin' is going on ♪

Mine...!

[bell dings] [grunts]

[harmonica playing]

[bell dings]

[sighs]

Mine.

Mine, motherfuckers. [chuckles]

All mine.

Oh, Marty, Marty, Marty,
Marty, I have a grievance.

Oh... great.

- I really do.
- I can't wait to hear it.

Because you are gonna love this, okay?

I put in all the paperwork
to Building Services.

Go, keep talking.

- And Clyde just took Jeannie's office!
- [groaning]

- And it's mine!
- Oh! It's mine!

[chatter stops]

Mine. Mine, mine, mine, mine,
mine, mine, mine, mine, mine.

All this shit is mine. Yeah.

For better or worse.

[chatter resumes, phones ringing]

- Wait. Marty, wait, hold on.
- What?

- Don't listen to him.
- What?

- Just pretend he's a bug.
- What?

He just stole it. He took it
in an obvious coup d'état.

- He's actually harassing me.
- An attack on me.

A coup d'état in an office?

You didn't see what I saw.

- [speaks indistinctly]
- That's ridiculous!

We all know that Jeannie's office

is where your right-hand man...

Marty! Marty! Marty,
that guy called again.

Who won't leave his name...
He said that you're

- a fucking idiot if you don't call...
- Oh, I'm a fucking idiot?

- That's what he said. I wrote it down.
- Okay, well, tell him

he's a fucking idiot, and if he
calls again, hang up on his ass.

- Now, I'm gonna go in...
- But he's been calling every ten minutes.

- I'm gonna go in my...
- [all talking at once]

Stop. No.

He's actually calling
every five minutes now.

No...!

[groans]

Shit.

[sighs] I mean, how do I define myself?

I mean, what is me versus what is mine?

Do I define myself by... how I feel?

By my actions?

By the number of people who love me?

No, probably not that.

Or maybe I define myself by what I have.

Yeah. 'Cause if y'all ain't
been payin' attention,

I got a fuck-ton of shit! [chuckles]

Yeah, let's go with that one.

I mean, that's healthy, right?

- [bowling ball rolling down lane]
- And...

- [ball striking pins]
- Doug, what the fuck is wrong with you?

I'll hang up on him, but
he's gonna call back.

That was... odd.

Um, wait, this isn't over.

- I-I just have a couple more points.
- It is over.

- "Couple more points"?
- I think...

Oh... and look where I naturally fall...

- Marty's right-hand man.
- Now switch seats.

Oh, fantastic. That makes sense.

Get out of my seat, please.

[groans] Oh, fine. Now,

uh, Marty, do you mind
if my mentee JR sits in

- on this meeting?
- I'm not your mentee.

See that? We already have that typical
mentor/mentee banter going on.

You know, like, "Don't
embarrass me in front of Marty

or I'll get you fired."
That kind of banter.

- Because it's funny. It's funny stuff.
- Yeah.

Well, you are well aware of
the fact that I assigned JR

to this consult, right?

Of course. I just think
that without my mentorship,

he may not necessarily be
in the sanctum sanctorum.

Mm. You're talking about the
conference room, right?

- I think he means the conference room.
- Why don't you back off, thief.

- I'm not a thief.
- Yes, you are.

And I don't see you helping
struggling young associates

- learn the ropes around here.
- I'm not struggling.

You mean I don't force myself
on some young new hire

who can't tell you to fuck off?

He tells me to fuck off all the time!

Doug, shut the fuck up.

Thank you, Marty. Jesus Christ!

Uh, you can shut the fuck up, too.

- Ooh...
- You know what?

- Share the goddamn office.
- Yes! Thank you.

- No, no, no, no, that's not happening.
- Oh, you're gonna share the goddamn office.

- No, that can't happen!
- JR, you get their old office

all to yourself.

- No Doug?
- No Doug.

- Davis/Dexter. Let's go.
- Well, from what I understand,

your former business partner

and current co-parent

and newly appointed Davis/Dexter
CFO Jeannie van der Hooven

- has actually...
- Wait a second, van der Hooven?

- Sounds Dutch, right?
- It is Dutch.

- Oh, is it?
- And totally irrelevant.

What we want to know is

Who is this Jeannie van
der Hooven, all right?

- What does this CFO want?
- [Clyde] Sure. Okay, thinking out loud.

Let's know some facts. Well...

she had a kid out of wedlock,
right? Write that down.

[Doug] How about this?

That's true. How about this?

She got her business partner
sent to federal prison.

- Hilarious.
- Well, okay, so she's mean

and slutty... let's write that
down, JR. Write that down.

I actually heard she had a sex tape.

- She does! Bing-bing-bing...
- Ooh, do you want to see it?

I'll show it to you right now.

These aren't quite the facts

I was talking about, you fucking idiots.

- JR, please.
- Okay.

Well, she hasn't really
given us an agenda,

which leads me to believe
that she's fishing

for us to either arrive at her pre-bake,

or she wants us to give her
some kind of point of view

that she hasn't yet conceived of.

So I go to Davis/Dexter.
What are some assumptions

we can make about what they want?

Pulling from some B-school
friends who work there,

I wouldn't say that the
CEO Teddy Grammatico

was really looking for
much in the way of change.

They've been pretty stick-in-the-mud
since Grammatico took over.

Yeah, well, why would they
change? The P-and-L's

- are outstanding.
- Look.

Davis/Dexter is rolling in profits,

and they have a solid
reputational standing

of coming out of the financial
crisis without any major scars.

- So why change, right?
- Nice.

- That's what I'm talking about.
- Just makes me nervous, right?

You know why.

I mean, what's her play?

What does she want from us?

Corporate Jeannie is fucking terrifying.

- Yeah.
- And on top of that,

she knows all our "wittle" tricks. So...

[exhales] Well...

- I'm scared.
- Yeah.

Marty, I think you're
gonna have to hold me.

- Jesus, get away from me.
- Yeah. I'll just go to my new office,

- 'cause if I'm in their first, it's mine.
- No, that's not true!

- That's not true! Shotgun! Shotgun!
- Yerp! Yerp!

White people, right?

Uh, yeah.

Hey, man. Drop a beat.

Bust a groove, man.

- Huh?
- Yeah, let's make it hot.

Go.

[beatboxing]

Black bait. Don't ever take the
fucking black bait. Jesus!

Fucking fell for the black bait?

[gasps] It's Kaan and the Associates!

- Aw.
- Ah, I loved

your early stuff, but I
feel like you went downhill

after you lost that cute lead singer.

[Marty] Jeannie, seems like a bit much

for a day at the office, huh?

[Doug] Speaking of offices, after I did
all my due diligence... I filled out

all the paperwork...
Clyde just walks in

and starts squatting in your old office.

- Wow, I am 100% not interested.
- 'Cause it's so uninteresting.

I'm not done. But then I put my
foot down, and now we're sharing.

- [Jeannie] Really?
- No!

Yeah!

Still not interested.

Hey, Jeannie,

where's the, uh, boyfriend?

Named Mark.

Eh.

- Ooh...
- Mark!

He works in the other complex, in R&D.

[Clyde] I'm sorry, I can't
take you seriously.

There's a man playing

with your hair. What is this?

I have to give a presentation to
500 of the pharmaceutical reps.

I know it's absurd, but
they really eat it up.

[Clyde] Are you serious?

- I've seen these before!
- Yeah. No, no, these things are amazing.

- I love these. I love these.
- Yeah.

So what's gonna happen is,

- we're gonna be there, right?
- Oh, yeah.

- Oh, yeah. Up front.
- Just cascading singles

- at your vagi...
- Yeah, they touch,

- and then security kicks you out.
- No.

You can stay the hell in
here and do your job.

Aw, it's a show.

No. We got to see it.

I'm serious... you're not
allowed in the auditorium.

Okay. So we've got some initial thoughts

about your financials...
Uh, it's just anecdotal stuff,

really, you know, uh,
soft-backed number...

Marty, please just...
give it to me straight.

[chuckles] Okay.

Uh, Grammatico's gonna want

- a stay-the-course scenario.
- Well, I want

to go balls-deep in R&D.

What? Why?

Because that's what we should be doing,

- even though Teddy doesn't know it yet.
- Why the fuck wouldn't you

just tell us that from the start
if all you wanted us to do

is rubber-stamp your agenda?

Oh... 'cause I wanted to see

if you could come to it on your own.

- And because I can.
- [groans]

I told you she'd be as much of
an asshole as any other client.

- Thanks, buddy.
- Oh.

So, um, I ran a spreadsheet
on all the patents

running out over the next five years,

and the profit-loss continuum

is pretty fucked.

If we continue to count
on our greatest hits...

Blood pressure meds and boner pills...

We're gonna drive right off a cliff.

[Marty] Yeah, here's the
thing, though, Jeannie.

You are saying, "Yes, yes, yes,"

but your CEO is saying, "No, no, no."

Well, that's 'cause he's
afraid of the board.

And I'm... oh, shit!

See, I'm leaking.

Great. Come on.

[Doug] Oh, God, I'm having a...

[clears throat] ...swirl of emotions.

[low chatter]

[sighs] Listen,

I really need you guys to
back me up on this, Marty.

Teddy thinks you're a genius.

So back me into a
reverse-engineered model

- that supports my move, okay?
- Hey, Jeannie.

- Whoa, whoa.
- It's not up for discussion, Marty.

- I really need him on my team.
- Jeannie,

Jeannie, Jeannie, Jeannie.

I feel like you're not hearing me.

- Jeannie!
- Could you just convince him...

That is not our baby.

Oh. Oh.

Yeah, hand her off. Sorry.

- That's okay.
- Sorry. [chuckles]

Sorry. Yeah.

That... looked a lot like our baby.

Yeah, it did.

Oh, I left her at home today.

- She's with the nanny.
- [laughs] Oh.

Well, now I got to go pump.

She didn't bring her today?

Yeah.

- See, this is what I'm talking about.
- Doug...

- That's why they can't be present.
- Don't start. Do not...

It's starting to make
more sense. Am I wrong?

[Announcer] Ladies and
gentlemen of the Davis/Dexter

Southwest Division Sales Force...

please put your hands together

for the chief officers of
your very own Davis/Dexter!

[rapping] ♪ My name is
Norman Peters, I'm the CMO ♪

♪ And all the sucka
emcees know how I flow ♪

Oh, it's almost too good.

It's like... it's like
a beautiful dream.

But we're awake. It's
like a waking dream.

- ♪ Erectile dysfunction is not a joke ♪
- ♪ Is not a joke ♪

♪ One in four men suffer,
the studies show ♪

♪ But Davis/Dexter has the
cure to make the ladies say ♪

[All] ♪ Oh... ♪

♪ So what you waitin' for? ♪

♪ It's called Climaxicor ♪

♪ We're going door-to-door
to sell Climaxicor ♪

- [audience cheering]
- ♪ S-Dub sales reps ♪

♪ All across the land ♪

♪ Pay attention to the lady
with the mike in her hand ♪

♪ I'm MC Jeannie ♪

♪ van der Hooven ♪

♪ My threads are dope and
my rhymes are groovin' ♪

♪ A brand-new product line
is what we're movin' ♪

♪ 'Cause the latest biotech
is already proven ♪

- ♪ Yo, here at Davis/Dexter I'm the CFO ♪
- ♪ I'm the CFO ♪

♪ I'm the one who counts the
money, makes the profits grow ♪

♪ But let me turn it over to
the man you all should know ♪

♪ He's at the top of his
game and about to blow ♪

♪ MC Grammatico, Teddy is his name ♪

♪ And for all the
scratch you're makin' ♪

♪ He's the one to blame ♪

♪ With a beat so fresh
it's hard not to rhyme ♪

♪ Our meds outpace competitors
most of the time ♪

- ♪ I'm the CEO ♪
- ♪ CEO ♪

♪ Believe I don't mind ♪

♪ To save happy marriages
one pill at a time ♪

♪ So what you waitin' for? ♪

♪ It's called Climaxicor ♪

♪ We're going door-to-door ♪

♪ To sell Climaxicor ♪

[audience cheering]

I have seen the soul of white people.

- Oh!
- And they should put it back.

[music stops, cheering loudly]

Welcome, Southwest Division Sales Force!

[panting] Are you ready

to make an ungodly amount of money?

[cheering wildly]

God bless Davis/Dexter.

Saving the world, one penis at a time.

As you can see, all
our resources go into

repackaging patents we already have,

squeezing a few more bucks out of them.

So this Climaxicor is not a new drug?

No, it's a time-released
version of Urjacor,

our flagship ED drug.

Hmm.

Interesting. Okay.

Oh, my God, Douglas.

[Jeannie] Jesus, Doug.

Just ask me for a sample.

Okay, I will.

May I have a sample?

[laughs] Yes.

Thank you. Thank you.

- Thank you so much.
- Careful with it.

You're not going to need that much.

- Hey. There you are. Hi.
- Hi.

I was just giving Doug

some pills for his erectile dysfunction.

- I'm just curious, that's all.
- Oh. Hey, be careful with that.

It's very powerful.

Okay, thank you, Mr. Fielder.

I know a little something about boners.

[laughs] Hey, wasn't she great today?

Forget about it, she was amazing.

- And you looked hot up there.
- Was I as hot as Norm?

[laughing] No, no, nobody
could be as hot as Norm.

- [Clyde] Was Norm this one?
- [Marty] The one that...

Oh, yeah, then he... he...

[laughing] Oh, Norman.

[laughing, sighs] All right.

- Well, I should, uh, get back.
- No.

Spend a few more hours in an empty lab

waiting to get fired.

Um, nice to see you.

And I will see you tonight.

- Okay.
- Okay?

One more, one more, one more.

- [Clyde] Wow.
- [Doug] Oh.

[laughs]

Double-up.

- [Doug] Wow.
- [Clyde] Jeannie.

How'd you finally end up
with such a great guy?

- How'd...? I didn't hear...
- After...

I'm not done with my... sentence.

After being with the
greatest guy of all,

Marty Kaan?

You finished?

You got a black baby together.

And... Doug gets the office.

- Really?
- No.

- Yes.
- Oh. That is so unfair.

[Clyde] I'm thinking of
having a black baby...

[Marty] Yeah, that meant a lot.

[camera clicks]

Oh, my God.

I... I already have 207 likes.

Wow. Now you're really somebody.

Yeah.

Okay, I want you to try this.

Mm-hmm.

- That was good.
- [laughing]

You're so lying right now.

I mean, it looks good,
but is it totally vegan?

Yeah, dude, it's beyond vegan.

It's raw vegan.

Raw vegan. What?

I mean, it's awesome.

You know, you're not actually living

a healthy vegan lifestyle if you drink.

That's interesting.

Yeah, no, that's worth a discussion.

Is it?

Well, I think everything in moderation.

No, don't, don't, don't bother.

He's got the conviction
of the newly brainwashed.

No, actually, straight-edge

is not brainwashing, okay?

It's... it's a philosophy

and a lifestyle.

"Don't smoke, don't drink, don't fuck.

I mean, at least I can fucking think."

- Wow. Right?
- Ho-kay.

I mean, 'cause why quote Schopenhauer

when you can quote Minor Threat.

- Exactly.
- [door opens]

- [Phoebe fussing]
- [Jeannie] Hello.

- [Jeannie]
- [grunts] Incoming.

- Baby sis. How is she?
- [door closes]

- She's good. Phew.
- Good.

Time to get out of this stroller.

- You can take her out.
- Hi.

- Hello.
- There you go.

Hi. Yes.

How are you doing?

[Phoebe grunting]

- [giggles]
- Are you smiling

or are you farting?

You look hot.

- Thanks.
- Yeah.

You look amazing.

- [Roscoe making popping sounds]
- Thank you.

How's the job?

Um... you know.

No idea. [laughs]

[mouthing]

It's fun.

Hard.

Confusing.

Oh.

I don't know.

Um, I should get going.

Come on, Jeannie.

Female friendship is the new black.

I will definitely think on that.

But I do have reservations.

For dinner. I have
reservations for dinner.

Right now.

[sighs] All right, I love you.

- Bye-bye.
- Oh.

By the time I come back, I expect her

to be as cool as you, okay? Good-bye.

- [Phoebe fussing]
- Okay. I can do that.

- Bye, baby girl.
- Oh, kiss. Okay.

- Jeannie, Jeannie.
- Yes. Marty, Marty.

[Marty chuckles]

- Hey.
- [quietly] What?

I don't treat your
boyfriend like an asshole.

Well, my boyfriend's not an asshole,

- so that's the difference.
- Okay, really?

So she makes a gesture of friendship

and that's just traumatizing to you?

Oh, my God, Klare wants to be my friend.

- Really, what the...
- Sorry. She's lovely.

Christ, she's a vegan chef spokesmodel?

First of all, it's raw vegan.

And she's an Instagram
lifestyle personality.

Blech.

I hope she gives good head.

I'll take that as a yes.

Or a no.

God, you're good.

I know.

[Roscoe] You guys,
she-she... she crapped.

- Whoops.
- Crap?

- Bye!
- No, no, no.

[Jeannie moaning]

[sighs]

[panting]

[Mark and Jeannie laugh]

Mmm.

Oh, wow.

Wow. [sighs] [Mark laughs]

You make me dinner,

you are having me do things that...

some of them I've only read about.

I could really get used to this.

I think I might.

You...

Me, too.

[quietly] Really?

Yeah. I mean, I feel the same way.

Whatever that is.

Right, no, whatever... I mean, me, too.

- Right?
- Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

Do you want some more wine or anything?

I want some you.

Yeah, the wine can wait, right?

I mean, that stuff gets better with age.

[groaning]

Marty...

Mark... y, Marky, Marky.

[inhales deeply]

[dog barks in distance]

Did you just call me Marty?

No.

Did I slur?

I think I'm just tired
and a little drunky.

Mm. So you did or you didn't? I mean,

'cause I totally get if you did. Get it.

- Who... You know, I... Did you...
- Right. And it's okay.

It's okay with me.

Fuck, it's not okay.

I did. I'm sorry. [sighs]

You know, it's totally weird,

and it sometimes freaks me out.

God, I'm really sorry.

It's okay, I accept it.

I really do.

I mean, people

do weird shit, right?

And...

sometimes it's shit
that's hard to explain.

I mean, for people who don't...

understand it, you know,

it could be unforgivable.

So you call me Marty, it's, uh...

s-super weird.

But it's also a turn-on.

You know? So does that

make me weird? Am I the weird guy here?

Maybe. Maybe.

I don't know. I...

Oh, I'm sorry. I just...
I just like your voice.

Mm. You know?

It's part of who you are.

And you turn me on.

Hey, you know, I called my, uh,

third-grade teacher "Mom" once.

Uh, n... and not in a purely sexual way.

I'm kidding, but...

she was hot.

Uh, my teacher, not my mom.

But my mom...

was not an unattractive lady.

You know,

when, uh...

the sun is hitting her just...

[snoring]

Babe?

Oh, goody, Klare's in the kitchen.

[laughing]

What are you making?

Don't worry, I'm not gonna poison you

with any cashew cheese.

- Yes.
- Just coffee.

Just coffee, huh?

Mm-hmm.

You know,

there are, uh,

there's better ways to wake up.

Really?

Really, really.

Well, what about Roscoe?

Roscoe?

- Yeah.
- Which one is he again?

No, that kid sleeps like a rock.

I got to drag his ass out of bed.

What about your dad?

Now, he might walk in.

- Really?
- Yeah, really.

You're on.

Tell me something good.

[Marty] You're gonna love this.
Clyde, tell her something good.

Sure. Hey, Jeannie, that
jacket looks amazing.

- You look hot today.
- Mm,

and those shoes.

- How are we doing?
- Not good.

Teddy Grammatico actually has
a long and well-documented

history of failing upwards

while lateral-passing the
blame to other shareholders.

Yeah, he's a stay-the-course guy

- all the way.
- Okay. I have been

talking to, um,

some of the influential board members.

Oh... Uh, Whip Huxton.

Oh, I'm gonna go out on a
limb and say not a Jew.

Uh, that is a terrible idea, Jeannie.

- Come on.
- Eek. No board members.

[Marty] Listen, you make an end run

around the CEO and go to the board,

it's gonna look like you're
gunning for his job.

Hello?

No, I am trying to save Teddy

from his own lousy business plan.

If he finds out that you're talking

to board members, he's going to shit

his bespoke pant...

Oh, it's the Kaan and
Associates Dream Team.

Hey, Teddy, how you doing?

- How's it going?
- Very good.

Figuring out a way for Jeannie
to make us even more money?

That is exactly what we were
doing when you walked in.

And if I may say, sir,
we are crushing it.

Absolutely crushing it, so...

I don't know who you are.

Forgive me, sir. Doug Guggenheim. Yeah.

You know what, let me
just jump in and, uh,

spin Davis/Dexter's journey
line the way I see it,

and I think that's gonna
shed some light on...

Marty, I want you

to know it's very important
that whatever you bring in

regarding financials has to
be bold-letters dazzling.

This is the first outside modeling

the board will have
seen since I took over

nine months ago. Is that pretty clear?

Jeannie?

- Marty?
- Ye... Bold-letters dazzling.

That's what we do, Teddy.

- Helvetica bold.
- Doug...

Or Futura.

Definitely something sans serif.

- I got him. I apologize.
- I have a meeting.

Um, Marty, I'm thrilled you're aboard.

Jeannie raves about you.

- Oh, thank you, Teddy.
- Thank you.

- We're gonna crush it, man.
- [phone vibrates]

[sighs]

Hello.

Wh-Where are you?

Are you armed?

[sighs] Yeah, okay. Okay. Shit.

Look, I'll be back as
fast as I can, okay?

You guys, make this shit better.

Marty.

- Make it better?
- I'm unsure of what

"better" means in this context, Marty.

- Really?
- We'll make it better.

See that? That's why
Clyde gets the office.

What, for that?!

I can make it better. Right hand.

Skip "Fucking Shit In My
Briefcase" Galweather.

Marty "Blew Up My Fucking Life" Kaan.

Hey.

Aw.

You know Doug Guggenheim
still uses that briefcase?

Well, it's a very nice briefcase.

Yes. Sans shit, but yes.

So, uh, called me about 14
fucking times yesterday.

Is this about the Sadie Hawkins Dance?

[chuckles]

I want to buy you, Marty.

Um, okay, let me let you in on

a little nugget of reality, Skip.

It's been a while since your people

could, you know, buy my people.

[chuckles] [grunts]

Yeah, I...

You know what I'm saying.
I think you knew

- before you even sat down.
- Yeah.

I want to buy K and A.

Well, I appreciate that you
have bounced back, Skip,

but I just don't think you
got the scrilla, papi.

- I'm sorry, the what?
- The scrilla... the money.

No, I-I don't... I don't
think you quite understand.

I represent a consortium.

The Kohl brothers.

Think you might have heard of them.

Uh, Hitler One and Hitler Two?

Yeah, they're adorable.

- Yeah. They got the, uh...
- Scrilla.

- Scrilla.
- That's good, but why would I want

to work with them? I mean, when
I've spent the last ten years

trying to get out from under.

You're a little slow on
the uptake today, Marty.

No, not working with them

or me or the company.
We are talking about

the big payday.

We pay you to walk

the fuck away and never look back.

It's the age of consolidation, Martin.

I'm sure you know, the
universe... it's dying.

Yeah, I do.

I mean, all those
brilliant stars out there

are fading away into glowing
embers. And what does that mean?

In the smaller sense, you know,
in the... in the sense of our

smallness, our littleness,

our infinitesimality, what does it mean?

It means that we've got to do
everything we can to get bigger,

to huddle together in
the coming darkness,

to rage against the dying of the light.

That-that was it? That was the pitch?

You want to buy K and A because
the universe is dying?

Yeah.

That, and your company is...

very conveniently undervalued.

Just a little. Yeah.

Now-now you're getting to it.
You want a fucking deal, Skip?

Well, no, my group is
willing to wildly overpay.

Okay, well... I want to thank you.

I do. Because I've been
thinking a lot lately about...

what is me? You know, what is mine?

H-How... Who the fuck am
I, you know what I mean?

How do... how do I define myself?

It's just coming into focus that

I define myself by
motherfuckers like you.

By conflict, is what I'm
saying, by opposition.

By the way that I just grind

on my enemies until eventually

they are just dust that I walk on.

[laughs]

So that's me. You know?

And I'm gonna get my company

so pumped up,

that my valuations are just jacked,

and when they're that high,

then, maybe, we can talk

about me selling my company

to a couple of fascist pricks
like the Kohl brothers

and then walking the fuck away
from everything I've built.

Maybe we'll do that then.

So unlike you to be a whimpering

little whining bitch about business.

I know. I...

That's usually your thing.

[both laughing]

I got the drinks, Marty.

Great.

Oh. Okay.

Oh, I almost forgot. Skip?

Yeah?

Go fuck yourself.

Back at you.

♪ It's like peace and comfort ♪

♪ My knees get buckled ♪

♪ I drop some sweat on my Nike sweats ♪

♪ I might waste it all
at the mall today ♪

♪ Hey, ego, check yourself,
don't wreck yourself ♪

♪ I'm a go-getter, I reckon so ♪

♪ That's the greatest feeling ♪

♪ Like a halo on a angel ♪

♪ Dodgin' crooks, makin' moves ♪

♪ Thank you, ma'am, stack a hand ♪