House of Ho (2020–2022): Season 1, Episode 2 - Ho! Ho! Ho! - full transcript

[music]

♪ Can't nobody hold me down ♪

♪ I'm steady
walking like I got ♪

♪ Three commas in
my bank account ♪

♪ Living loud ♪

♪ So get your cameras out ♪

♪ I probably do the
same thing if I was you ♪

♪ Looking at me now, now ♪

♪ Hmm ♪

♪ Put up your lights ♪

♪ And keep them flashin' ♪



♪ Don't ever put them down down,
down ♪

♪ Look at me now ♪

[music]

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Everybody go ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Everybody go ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Everybody go down ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Everybody go ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Everybody go ♪

♪ Oh ♪



♪ Everybody go down ♪

♪ Every night is a holiday ♪

- You ready to go Christmas shopping,
Ho style?

[laughs]

♪ Sing it out, loud ♪

- I don't like flying
on small planes.

[exclaims] I need a Xanax.

- You didn't take one before?

- No.
- Oh.

- I'm fine on planes,

just not the little ones.

- We haven't even gone up yet.

This is part of the
contract of being a Ho.

You have to be able
to withstand private jets.

Mom, she's gonna throw up.

Give me the Chanel bag.

God forbid my Hermes.

- I'm not gonna throw up,
I just have anxiety.

- Oh, okay.

You look like you're
about to throw up.

- No. I have anxiety.
- Oh okay.

- We'll be fine.
- Stop talking.

One hour there and then one hour

of eating and shopping?

- If you go down,
I'm going down with you.

Does that make you feel better?

- No, Judy.

- You eat some food?

- No, I don't want to eat.

- Do you want champagne?
- No.

- Tequila shot?
- No.

- She'll be okay.
- She'll be okay.

- Lesley.
- What?

- Did you put your seatbelt on?

- No. Am I supposed to?

♪ Everybody go down ♪

- Cheers, Mom.

- Jesus Christ.

♪ Woah ♪

♪ Yeah, woah, oh, oh ♪

♪ Woah ♪

♪ Yeah, woah, oh, oh ♪

♪ Woah ♪

- Welcome to Dallas.

- Cheers to Dallas.
- Cheers to Dallas.

♪ If you feel it in your soul ♪

- So nice seeing you again.

- Oh, good to see you.
- Our Houston girls are here.

- You look fabulous.
- Thank you.

- One of our favorite
things to do as a family

around the holidays is
to have a girls' day out.

Go shopping, have champagne.

Life as a Ho has a
lot of advantages.

♪ Let it let it ring out ♪

What do you think?

- It's fabulous.

- Lesley.

This is Lesley Ho right here.

- That says Judy Ho.

- No. I think this will look...
- It's shiny and gold.

So good on you.

- I'm still learning
what it's like

to be married into a family
with this kind of money.

- This is Oscar de la Renta.
- It's very cute.

- When they can spend
whatever they want to,

they don't even
look at a price tag.

They always hide the
sale section in the corner.

When I was younger,

we really scraped
for our pennies,

and we always looked
for sales and deals.

- Where's Judy?
- Over there.

- Of course.
- Uh-hmm.

- She never goes
to the sale first.

- I know. She does...
- She doesn't like it.

- Wastes money.
- [laughs]

♪ If you feel it in your soul ♪

- Wow. Beautiful.
- What do you think Mom?

- Because it's shiny?
- Yeah.

Everybody look at you.

- I know.
- [laughs]

- The dress that
says "Look at me."

- What are you wearing?

- Silver sequins.

- You look like a disco ball.

- I like it. It's fun.
- I love this.

Yeah, it's, um, extra fun.

- Yes. That's me. Extra fun.

- I work so hard for my money.

Just because you have it,
doesn't mean you have

to spend it like that.

- I think that dress is fabulous,
girls.

- You know what's fabulous?
- It's 75% off.

I like this fun over that fun.

- I like this fun over that fun.

[laughs]

[music]

Look at my mom.

- I can't get out of my brain

that my mother-in-law
called me a tyrant.

- You know, I think Washington's
been talking to my mom,

because she told me that
she thinks you're a tyrant

when it comes to Wash.

- Me?

But I wish Wash would
explain to my mother-in-law

how hard I work to be his wife.

- JUDY: How'd you like that
flying to Dallas for the day

to go shopping?

- It's great.

I love Dallas. I
would live in Dallas.

- Do you think Washington
would move there?

- He said he would.

- What's stopping him?

- Mom and Dad,
kind of holding him back.

- So that means he wouldn't go?

- Not right now.

- Yeah.

In fairness to Washington,

I do believe that the
amount of pressure

that Washington
has grown up with,

the expectations
that are placed on him

as the oldest son,

that he's struggling too.

I feel like Washington needs

that fresh start.

He's always in my dad's shadow,
forever.

My dad has made
his name in Houston.

Washington will
never outgrow that,

unless he goes out on his own.

- I don't think he
should outgrow it.

I-I think he's just
trying to live up

to your Dad's expectations.

- But to live up to my
dad's expectations,

he would need to get
out of my dad's shadow

and make his own mark.

- You think Wash isn't ready

to go off on his own? He's not.

- Not necessarily
that he's ready,

but that he needs to,

you know what I mean?

Him waiting around
till he's ready?

That could be forever.

- Well, I'm-I'm-I'm...

I just need a minute.

[music]

[yelling]

- You want cracker?

- Use two hands. Two hands.

No, don't touch it,
don't touch it.

You're gonna ruin your nails.

- There you go. Perfect.
- Mom.

- A Ho Christmas is
like a month-long event.

I mean you got the caviar,
you got the champagne flowing,

lobster.

It's beautiful.
Everything's amazing.

Why am I reaching
into a hot pot?

- You said you wanted
learn how to cook lobster.

- The only thing missing

is my family back in Oklahoma.

- [speaks Vietnamese]

Only if you approve, Aunt Tina.

I don't know what
time you started today,

but you know you're
thirsty. (laughs)

- I used to have a
liquor store in the 80s.

I drink everything
in the liquor store,

every single one, I try it.

Beer, liquor, wine, even the MD,

you know, those kind of crazy,
Mad Dog, thing.

- There's some wine.

- One thing I know,

after I drink a lot,

the best way is I eat
a real good banana.

It's not green,
but it's just nice banana.

- [speaks Vietnamese]

Hmm. That's the best lobster

- I've ever had.
- Thanks

- for helping me make it.
- So good.

- Hey Ma look,
this lobster's female.

That's good, right?

- Yeah.

- In Vietnam female lobsters

supposedly tastes better
because you have the uterus

and the eggs.

And if they have eggs,
it's good luck.

The eggs don't
taste that great to me.

- You-you're not
putting enough butter.

- On the eggs?
- Yeah.

- Supposedly,
it's the first thing that's picked off

of from the Asian supermarket.

So for us to find
a female lobster

that's good luck
because it's-it's rare.

- And you look at it,
how can you know

it's a male or female?

- For a lobster? I don't know.
- [chuckles]

- When you look in the tank,

if the one looking at you

it looks like it don't like you

that means jealous

that means it's female.

But it one looks at
you like it likes you,

that's a male.

- Oh.

- I love females

when it comes to-to food.

- Washington always likes females,
no matter what.

[laughter]

- What about the soup, Mom?

- You want it?
- Yeah.

- I'll get you some.
- I love it.

- Yeah, I love soup.
- Give me the first one

with all the chicken feet, okay?

- Of course Washington
gets the first bowl.

Of course.

- First son is the always
the important thing.

- I can't help it,
that's just who I am.

- It's an Asian thing.
- Yeah.

- Asian tradition,

my brother Binh
Ho is the oldest boy,

he's the one carry on
the legend of the family,

and then the next
one is have to be a boy

of Binh Ho to
carry on the legend.

When Hue had Washington,
oh my god.

She feel like she's
on top of the world,

because she have a golden
boy for the whole family.

First son is only to
carry on the name.

The first son is always
the important thing.

- I know. That's
why when I was born,

I was a disappointment.

- My mom always says...
- No.

Yeah. My mom always
says my dad told her

you can't stop having
kids till you have two sons.

Is that true, Dad?

- Hmm...

- Yeah.

[laughter]

If my parents had to choose

between me and Washington,

they would choose
Washington all day.

And it's always
been that way. [sighs]

- You did a great job on that spread,
Judy.

- The cheese bar?

- That's definitely one thing
that Judy does better than me.

Some things that
females are better at.

- Having babies?
- There's somethings

that males are bet... yeah.

- More than that, tennis.

I'm pretty sure she
can beat you up.

- What?

Are you kidding me?

- Yeah.

- I think so.

- She's trying to
mentally mess with me.

- I'm not trying, I am.

[laughter]

- There's only one way
we're gonna figure this out.

- Let's do this.

- Set it up.
- Yeah.

Washington challenged me

to a tennis match.

I've been putting up
with his shit for years,

he's just trying to prove like,

that golden boy
status is deserved.

And if he's gonna challenge me,

I'm not gonna back down.

- Honey,
do I have any caviar in my teeth?

- You have one at the bottom.

- Right here?

- Gross.

[music]

- So what's been going on,
my friend?

- Not much, Sir.
- Taking care of the family,

Christmas shopping.

- Christmas shopping?

- Where are we going, boss?

- Let's head to the gym.

But we got to go
to my Mom's house.

She has something
waiting for me.

Just trying to get my
mental state of mind

right before this, uh,
upcoming match

I have with Judy.

You know, physically,

Judy really doesn't
have a chance,

but she's been messing
with my head a lot lately,

and, uh,
the gym helps with focus.

- Yes, Sir.

- Beautiful day, huh?

Hey, Mom.

- Good morning, Ma'am.

- Hello.

[speaks Vietnamese]

- Yeah. I'm gonna go exercise.

- I have three kids,

but only Washington

like the Vietnamese food,

that makes me happy.

- Just put it right here.

- Okay, go ahead.

- Thanks Mommy.
- Okay.

- Be good boy, okay?
- Okay.

- Exercise, okay?
- Thanks, Mom.

- I love you. Okay.
- Love you too.

I'm 99.9% sure

that my Mom loves me
more than my siblings.

Most people say, oh,
you love Washington too much.

You made him that.

But you know, what?

Who has fun being a good boy?

Being a bad boy is way more fun.

- Have a nice day, Ma'am.
- All right. Thank you.

- Oh. She's so sweet, huh?

- I love your mom,
you know that.

[music]

- You really do go all-out,
Lesley.

- It's my favorite holiday.

It's the best time of the year,
I love it.

- No. Just for the kids.

If it were me,
I'd just go to Cabo on vacation

and call it a day.

- You had to move the ribbons,
Judy.

- What? I was
making them better.

- [sighs] How is that better?

- It looks good.
- Less is more.

- You're definitely not a Ho.

- Why?

- More is more.

Do you think Wash would like it?

- Yes. He loves
everything I like.

[chuckles]

- Sure about that?
- Yup.

- Okay.

- He's been working
out a lot lately.

- He's been working out?

- Yeah,
like playing tennis again.

- Huh.
- Yeah.

- He always thought
he was better

- than he really was.
- He said that he went

to the most prestigious
tennis camps.

- He went to tennis camp

does not mean he played good.

You can just... Anybody
can pay to go to camp.

- I don't know.

You both play tennis, right?

- Yeah. But he's the one
that got to go to camp.

- You didn't get to go at all?
- No.

My dad didn't let me go,
only Washington.

- Why is that?

- You know how he is.

We're raised by
the same parents,

but raised very differently.

- I know,
it's because you're a girl.

- Don't you remember?
- He's the favorite.

Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad.

- Hi.

- What did you bring?

- I have food for you.

Every week I go buy grocery.

I cook, and...

Wash and Roosevelt like it.

I bring it over here for them.

- One of the reason my wife

bring the food here,

uh,
to tell them she care for them,

she love them,

and make the family closer.

- Do you like her tree, Mom?

My mom is not the easiest person

to get along with.

Have you seen her
facial expressions?

- What do you think?

- Do you like it, Ma?

- That means no.

What's wrong with it?

- Light. It has no light here.
- Lights?

- Oh. I just got to plug it in.

- Just plug it in and see.

- Three, two.

- Who decorate it?

- I did.

- Lesley did.

- You help her?

- No, I, I,
all I did is what she told me to do.

- My Mother-in-law
hates my taste.

It's really hard
to win her over.

Do you want me to do
your Christmas tree?

[Hue laughs]

- No. We got

another baby girl.

- Bye-bye. See you later, okay?
- Oh, okay.

- It's a lot of pressure
to live up to expectations.

- Oh, my God, Judy.
- What?

Oh, my mom brought that?

Why?

- I swear,
every time she comes over...

- Yeah.
- She brings me

a new Virgin Mary.

I don't know if she thinks like
it's gonna help my marriage

or make me a better person

or I don't know.

- She just wants one
everywhere you turn

to remind you to
be more Christ-like.

To be nicer to her son.

- I am Christ-like.

- Her poor son.

- I have a collection
of these now.

- Where do you put 'em?

- Look.

- Jesus.

- That's what I'm saying.

- In your kitchen,
you have three.

How many of those
do you actually have?

- Like, 20?

- When I got married,
my parents did not bring

a Virgin Mary to my house

because my mother-in-law
had already bought 10 over,

so it would have
been unnecessary.

Where do you keep them?

- I put 'em in a bag.

- You can't just
leave them in a bag.

- Why?

- Oh, my God, Lesley.

It's God,
God belongs everywhere.

[music]

- I bought Judy
her mattress today,

because the four of
them are sleeping on

a queen-size bed.

We have other guest
rooms that she won't sleep in,

because she says her kids
wake up in the middle of the night.

- Uh-huh.
- So I felt bad,

so I just went out and bought her,
uh,

a queen-size mattress.

- Why did you buy
her a mattress?

I mean, you should've just let

my Mom and Dad handle it.

- When was the last time
you talked to your Mom?

(Washington exhales)

Do you tell her your
concerns and feelings?

- About what?

- Anything.

- About you?

- Uh-hmm.

- Sure.

I do. I do.

- What do you tell her?

- Well, like,
she knows what's going on.

I mean, I can't lie to her.

She lives two doors down,

and she's Asian.

Like, she can feel

certain energies.

- Well, you know,
Judy had lunch with her

the other day

at her house and your
mom said something

to her that really just kind of,

didn't sit well with me.

[Washington sighs]

She had said that

I was a tyrant.

- And tell me...
- I just...

what that means to you?

- It's not anything good.

- She doesn't mean it like that,
Lesley.

- So she had told you, too?

[music]

- No. She told... I just...

- She told Judy.

- I just told her the truth.

- I just told her...
- Uh-huh.

How it is.

And she said that,
I didn't say that.

My sister doesn't
bullshit enough for me.

Judy,
she should make Lesley feel like

she's the super lucky
one to be in our family.

- So,
when your Mom says something like tyrant

that really hurts my feelings,
you need to defend me.

- I'm gonna go fix this problem
and I'm gonna make sure that,

without making her feel bad.

- Uh-hmm.
- I'm not gonna tell her

you made me go there, right?

Did you make me go there,
or am I just going there

because I'm a good
husband? Tell me.

I'm going there because I'm a good husband,
right?

- Right.
- Okay.

- You should be.

- Look, I will go talk to her

and defend your honor,

- Thank you.
- You know I will.

But I want it to be authentic.

I wanna get something out of it.

- Like what?

- You know what.
- What I love most.

That pink taco.

- Ew.

- What?

- I don't even
like Mexican food.

- (sighs) Babe, come on.

- Just say maybe...
- We'll talk.

- Okay. Fine, I'll do it.
- We'll talk.

♪ Yeah you want what I
got when I took a bite ♪

♪ Put 'em up,
get a look because we wanna fly ♪

- If Washington's gonna
go out and practice

just so he can beat
me at this game,

I don't know why I
can't do the same.

Why are you making me run?

- (laughs) You gotta get ready.

- I know.

I'm tired of these gender
roles where everyone assumes

that the man is
better than the woman

when it comes to sports.

I wanna beat him just as
bad as he wants to beat me.

♪ Cause we wanna fly ♪

♪ If you need a
little something ♪

♪ Tell me what you like ♪

♪ Yeah cause I'm a bad bitch ♪

- Good job.

- Good game.

That was a real workout,
I'm sweating, I was like...

- You'll be fine,
you're gonna kick butt.

- I think I'll be fine.

- Yeah.

So, how's everything with you?

I haven't seen you
since Thanksgiving.

- Busy. Just getting the kids adjusted,
you know,

because the holidays
are coming up

so,
they have to split their time

between me and my ex

- and stuff like that.
- Uh-hmm.

I hope they're doing okay.

- Yeah. They're doing good.

- Yeah.
- It's just hard when they're at

their dads and they
have to come back,

- Uh-hmm.
- Because, you know,

that's the house
they grew up in.

So,
I think once we go to the new house

and they get adjusted.

- Uh-hmm.
- It'll be easier for them.

- Yeah. It'll just take time.

- I know.

- Have you been
able to meet anyone?

Is it too soon right now,
or what?

- Um, it's not as easy as just,
like, me dating someone,

I'm happy,
everyone's happy for me.

- Yeah.
- And, I mean...

- There's a lot of
factors involved now.

- You know how my family is like,
now,

if I brought it up everybody
would have an opinion like,

- "Oh, he's good for you...
- Yeah.

- He's not this, he's that."
- Especially Washington.

I mean, one moment he's like,

"You should date
someone like me."

The next moment he's like,
"Stay away from my friends."

- [laughs]
- So, I'm just like, "Dude."

I'm gonna keep it
to myself for now.

- Good. Yeah.
- And try and figure things out

on my own.

- Well, whoever it is,
he's gonna have to be pretty strong

guy to be introduced
to the Ho family.

- [laughs] You think so?

- Yeah.

- Oh.

♪ Watch out, watch out for me ♪

♪ I'm unpredictable ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Watch out, watch out for me ♪

♪ I'm unpredictable ♪

- I'm gonna go talk to my mom.

I'm thinking to myself,

"Mom did you really have
to put me in that position?"

So,
I got to go and settle things down

and, you know, not have my Mom,
like, go apologize to Lesley.

- Is Lesley forcing
you to do this?

- No, I mean, just... yeah.

But my wife's
gonna love me for it,

because she'll think
I'm defending her honor.

My Mom's gonna love me for it,

because she's gonna
think I'm on her side.

- What if she's like,
"Nah, fuck that."

- I can't show my mom that
I love Lesley more than her.

- Yeah.
- I can't show Lesley

I love my Mom more.

- Yeah.
- So, I defend her honor,

I smooth it out,
then you know who taught me that, right?

Binh Ho, my role model,
he taught me that.

- Washington and I are close
and he really opens up to me

and women do team up,
and, so, there...

There's two against one,
I mean, that kind of sucks.

- I got to stand up for
my wife. You know why?

Because I ultimately
have to live with her forever.

I feel like Judy's hating on me,
because it's like she's going

through her shit,
and she wants me to, you know,

like,
what do the White people say,

misery loves
company or some shit?

- I'm nervous.

- You got the courage?
- You think I can do it?

- Yes, you can do it.
- Got the smile, is it good?

- You can fucking do it,

yes, you can do anything.

[music]

- Who goes first?

- You.
- You go first.

- I go first.
- It's a single one.

- A single one.
- Put that first, right?

- But I wanna put the lowest
or you wanna put the highest?

- It's gonna take like 10 hours.

- Calm down.
- Don't worry.

- You need to put
your mind in the game.

- Do you wanna eat something?

- No, I'm not hungry today Mom.

- What's going on with you?

- Oh, everything is great.

- So,
what do you got to talk about?

- Huh?

- What do you got to talk about?

- Nothing.

- Nothing?

- Nothing. I just like
hanging out with my parents.

- Oh.
- You play.

- It's just hard to think right now,
Dad, hold on.

My dad always taught me don't ask,
don't tell.

So, I'm gonna listen to my Dad.

- Washington,
you remember you were gonna say something,

tell your Mom something?

- Do you have any food?
- I'm hungry.

- Food? Yeah.
- I got something to eat.

I need to get it.

I support everything he do,

it's not a bad thing.

- Finished?

- Yes.
- Did what you need to do?

- Yes.

I don't wanna lie to my wife,
but I love my mom.

At the end of the day I
know my mom loves Lesley,

it's just that
they're so different.

So,
I might as well just stop bothering

with telling her about it.

Make sure it doesn't
have any sugar.

- What are you
watching your diet?

- Yeah, I wanna look good just in case,
you know,

I become single one day.

- Why would you become single?

- You know why I
might be single again?

- You're not patient.

- What?
- (Sammy laughs)

- She learmed.
- You need patience, man.

- Because you're not patient.

- Because you and
her are so different,

so, I mean, same opinion.

- But he doing a lot better now.
- Okay.

- I'm trying Dad.
- He changed a lot.

Washington, I love him a lot.

I take care of him like a baby.

That's why when he
do something wrong,

he come to me.

(sighs) You have to talk to her.

- She doesn't listen.

- Do you listen to her?

- I mean, not all the time,
but I have.

Uh, the thing is, look,
our families are different.

- Yeah. We winning.
- [laughs]

- What?
- I'm Winning.

- He's winning.
- You keep talking

you didn't pay attention again.

- No, look, I have,
uh, I beat you.

- Too late.
- You owe me 10 bucks.

- I don't owe you 10 bucks.

- Oh, yes.

- Oh, yes.
- That's for lunch today, right?

- Yeah. You get a sandwich.
- You want to eat something?

- Yes.
- Apple?

What? No,
something you cook. I don't want no apple,

I can do that myself.

[music]

- What's up babe?

- Hey, honey.
- Just came from Mom's

and Dad's.

- Did you talked to her
like we talked about?

- I don't wanna lie to my wife,
but when my Dad says,

"Don't do a half lie
when it's with your wife,

do a full lie."

Yeah.

- Yeah.
- Yeah. (laughs)

- She's all good.
- Okay.

- Everything's perfect.

- What did you say to her?

- Um, I told her that, uh,
you know, it was a little,

you know,
disrespectful what she said about you.

- You actually said that to her?

- Well, I mean,
I said it in a different way, not...

- Uh-hmm.
- Exactly like that.

- You actually talked to her?

- Uh, I mean, we had to talk,
because we were playing cards.

- But you brought it up?
- Yeah.

I told her and she's-she's good.

- Okay.
- Yeah. She's really good.

Do you believe me?

- I don't know.

- Does it...
- I'm home.

- Hey.

- Why does it feel
so heavy in here?

- Y'all okay?
- We were just talking.

He just came back from Mom's.

- How was that?
- We talked.

- Oh, that's good.

- He said everything's fine.

- So, you're happy with that?

- I trust him. I mean,
if he says he talked to your Mom,

then I guess we'll find out

- if she comes over here more.
- I was just over there.

- I was over there.
- That's how I know.

- Okay.
- If she doesn't come over here

for the next week,
then I know nothing happened.

- Mom will be Mom,
but I did talk to her.

- Uh-hmm.
- I thought we've moved on

from this?

- Sometimes I feel like
Lesley's in the same spot

that I was in two years
ago in my own marriage.

My ex, you know,
he wouldn't admit to his faults.

And it's hard for me
to give her advice

that in the end
would hurt my brother,

or cause even more
trouble in our family.

- You look tired honey.

- I am tired.

- Dealing with Mom,
your sister, and your wife,

can't be easy right, Wash?

- It's tiring.

- Your life?

- Yeah.

- It can't be as tiring as mine,
or Judy's.

- What?

I shouldn't have
ever Googled it,

but the statistics say that
48% of married females,

that hang out with
divorced females,

will become divorced one day.

And Judy doesn't always
have a positive outlook

on her brother,
and of course in the back of my mind,

I'm like, "What the... are
they talking about right now?"

- Like I deal with
you and the kids.

- Let's not compare
how tired we are.

We're all tired.

- Yeah, but I'm sick and tired.
- Okay, tired of each other.

- Oh, my God.

[music]

- I got Judy in my
head right now.

Just down the street,
helping my Dad out.

Judy's house and
she's coming into it

with like no enthusiasm,
she's not...

I don't think she's
very grateful.

- I mean,
put yourself in her shoes,

like, she's moving into it,
without her husband.

- Right.

- That's fucking hard.

- Yeah,
it's hard but there's a lot of

single moms out there, right?

It happens.

- It's way bigger than what
Washington is thinking.

It's about the whole
family dynamic.

Because as a Catholic
Vietnamese family

we're supposed
to just stick it out,

we're just supposed
to suck it up,

stay married or stay in
this fucked up situation.

And now she's
doing it all by herself

with very little
emotional support.

- You know I
never told you this,

but when I left that energy job,

I was like in the back of my Dad's,
uh, house

living there.

My Mom meets Lesley,
right. One time.

- You were living
in the back house?

- Yeah.

And my mom's like,
"Look Washington

if you marry this girl, Lesley,

you don't owe me and Dad nothing

for the rest of your life."

I was like,
"You only met her once.

What do you mean
I'm gonna marry her?"

Like, why do you... She's like,
"Look,

in the past 32 years

you never listen to me,
look at where you're at.

Why don't you
listen to me one time,

and if things don't go well I
got your back, I always have."

So, that day I called
Lesley and I was like, "Hey,

why don't you move to Houston,
so, I could date you?

I don't got time,
I'm looking for marriage."

- That's how you asked her?

- And three weeks later
she moved down and look,

look at what I have now, right?

It's a nice insurance plan,
right?

I got my Mom and
Dad backing me up.

- Fuck, dude. What?

- Yeah.

I'm a spoiled rich kid.

- Damn, should that be on TV?

- But I've grown to
love her over time.

- I'm not saying it
makes Lesley look bad,

but I put myself in her shoes
and if my husband said that,

the father of my
two kids said that,

I'd be fucking pissed.

- I mean...
- We're still married.

We're happy.

- Yeah.

- Hey, sometimes some people need a push,
you know.

- Yeah. I guess, that's true.

- Ultimately my Mom's a
great judge of character

and, I'm not.

Being married to Lesley has
been the best thing in my life.

My Mom can, um, live with peace,

because she's the one that
helped make that decision.

[music]

- Go Mommy, go Mommy, go Mommy.

- Look, Washington's a great
tennis player. He may even win.

But the thing that matters to me

is that I didn't say
no to the challenge.

- We settle this
once and for all baby.

- It's on, Washington.

- Yeah.

- You gonna serve first?

- I'll let you pick.

- What do you want to do?
- Okay. I'll serve.

- You'll serve?
- You go get 'em.

- Oh, Lord.

- You ready?

- I'm ready.

- You can do it.

- He's gonna beat himself.
- Be consistent.

- Uh-hmm.
- Powerful,

and then you just whip his ass.

- I got it.
- Okay. All right?

- Okay.
- I got money on you too.

- High-five, high-five.
- Oh. Yay.

I love gamble,
and I think it's the whole family too.

- I got a... I got a
hundred on Washington.

- Ah!

- Wanna bet 20,
I'm gonna bet 40,

just to beat the
shit out of you.

That's it, that's how we do,
it doesn't matter.

We don't even care of the game,
we don't even know the game,

you talk about bet,
we bet. That's a Ho.

[music]

[cheers]

- Come on sister.
- Get him, get him girl.

♪ Pulling so hard
the devil prayed ♪

♪ I never back down,
I never back down ♪

♪ Don't get in my way ♪

♪ Don't get in my space,
don't kill ♪

[cheering]

- When Washington was young,

I sent him to tennis
training in Florida.

- Good shot.

- Because I know he
have not good discipline.

So,
I want those one who train him to be good.

- Out.
- I didn't send Judy there

because I don't
think she need that.

She's strong already.

[music]

- Good.

- Ooo.

- Oh.
- Nice.

- Good job honey.

- The focus baby.

(McKinley interrupts)

- I can't, I gotta play,
I gotta play.

This tennis match is like a
representation of our real life.

Washington's
concentrating on the game.

He has Lesley
worrying about his kids.

- Go daddy go, go daddy go.

- Shit!
- McKinley go over there.

Me on the other hand,
I don't have someone there

who's making sure that
they're not running up to me,

and trying to give me hugs
in the middle of the game.

Go, go, okay, go, go.

- Come on Judy.
- Stop trying to bail out.

- Okay, watch out for the ball.
- All right. Let's go.

- There you go,
there you go girl.

- You're an idiot.

- Oh!

- Good game.

- I won.

- Yay, Washington won.
- I won.

- Ah!

My son. Oh.

- I'll give Washington credit,

he followed through, he won.

[laughs]

It's probably one
of the few times

I've lost to
Washington in my life.

He needs it.

- Hi son.
- Hi.

- Hey, come here, come here.
- Play good, huh.

- Yeah. I had a good day.
- Yeah.

- Oh, yeah. I'm in my element,
I love attention.

- Winner. Family win.

- I love proving people
wrong and I love to win.

Was it fun to watch?

That was good right?

- I want the Santa one.

- But okay, which Santa one?
- We can sing it together.

Which one do you want?

Jingle Bells?

- Yeah.

♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells ♪

♪ Jingle all the way ♪

♪ Oh, what fun ♪

- Maybe these are my
favorite kind of moments

with my family,
when we're all together like this,

it makes me so happy.

♪ Jingle all the way ♪

I was raised to
believe that marriage

is the most important thing
and you do whatever it takes

to make it work.

When this is us
working through it.

I can't imagine going
through divorce like Judy,

I wish everyday could
be like Christmas.

♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells,
jingle all the way ♪

- Family hug.
- Good job buddy.

- Oh, look at that.

- Here it is, open this one.

[music]

(camera click)

(camera click)

♪ Oh, ooh ♪

♪ Make it rain, make it rain ♪

♪ I don't care ♪

♪ Because it's all the same ♪

♪ Oh, ooh ♪

♪ I'mma make the
best of any situation ♪

♪ Make it rain, make it rain ♪

♪ I don't care ♪

♪ I'mma be happy ♪

♪ No you can never rain on me ♪

[music]