House (2004–2012): Season 6, Episode 1 - Broken - full transcript

(SOMBER MUSlC PLAYlNG)

Help!

Help me!

(WOMAN TALKlNG ON PA)

Dry heaves are
gone, so am l.

l'll check with the doctor.

No, no, no.
l'm here voluntarily.
Just got to check with me.

l'm sorry.
Dr. Nolan left
specific instructions.

She's not sick,
she's scared.
So tell her to tell. . .

HOUSE: Wow.

And he's black.



Thought you'd be
a little more sensitive
on the slavery issue.

You can't keep me.

Dr. House,
you look a lot better.

l am a lot better.

No painkillers,
no hallucinations.

Leg hurts,
but it's manageable.

Great job.
Gonna miss you.

Want to start missing you
as soon as possible.

Well, legally, you're free
to go whenever you want,
but l suggest you stay.

l'll take it
under advisement.

lf you thought
the hallucinations were
from your Vicodin problem,

why didn't you
just check yourself
into a rehab facility?

l was deluded into
thinking l might be crazy.

But you have been
abusing Vicodin for years.



Never had delusions,
never had trouble sleeping,

never had any problems,
other than narcissism
and anti-social behavior,

until two colleagues
died, your father died.

Your issues run
deeper than Vicodin.

That's not gonna
cheer me up, is it?

You need to be transferred
to our long-term ward,

started on medication,
talk therapy. . .

Yeah. l get it.

Just one thing
l'm getting hung up on.
l can leave whenever l want.

How about l start with that?

You can't go back
to practicing medicine.

l don't want
to practice medicine.

l've decided
l want to be
an astronaut.

Well, if you want your
state astronaut's license,

you're gonna need
my recommendation.

ls that a popular
new treatment, blackmail?

You need to get better.

Welcome to Ward Six.

So, brass tacks.

What do l have to do and
how long do l have to be here?

Depends on you.
Process is pretty basic.

lf you follow the schedule,
agree to take meds,

participate in group
and individual therapy,
we can work on goals. . .

l set a goal.

Excellent.
What is it?

My goal is to get your boss
to write the letter that
l want him to write.

Now let's talk process.

l can smile through
gritted teeth and play nice,

but there are
serious risks of violence
involved in that choice.

So l'm going with turning
this ward upside down,

making you and your
boss' job and life
so unmanageable

that he'll write
whatever he has to
write to get rid of me.

SAFER: He's all set.

Thanks.

(ALVlE EXCLAlMlNG OUTSlDE)

ALVlE: Yo, l don't need
an escort. Get off me.

Who are you?
You believe these guys?

Lecturing me
on manic depression, like l
couldn't write a book or two.

l stopped taking my meds
because l want to stop
taking my meds,

because nothing is
wrong with me. No reason
to keep dragging me back here.

When l'm on them,
everything slows down,
that's when the problem is.

Hey, nice to see you.

My roomie last time
couldn't stand me.

(SARCASTlCALLY) Really?

l'm Juan Alvarez.
J.A.'s my stage name,

but Alvie's what everybody
around here calls me.

Like the Woody Allen
character in Annie HaII,

but the Puerto Rican version
and not as neurotic.

So, what do l call you?

You're actually waiting
for an answer this time?

You can call me House.

(EXCLAlMS)

(SlNGlNG)
He's a brick house

ALVlE: Hey, wait up.

l've already got
the whole place wired,
so l'll give you the rundown.

Yo, everybody, this is
my new roomie House, y'all.

Main thing you gotta know. . .
ls this a line?

Hey, Gabby,
meet my new
roommate, House.

You can call him Hizzy.

No, you can't.

Don't worry,
she won't call
you anything.

She hasn't talked
in like 1 0 years
or something.

Good you came here.
You need to know
the lay of the land.

l need to request a new room.

(LAUGHlNG)
You're funny.

You're also
gonna come here
to get your meds.

l'm not on any meds.

You either?
Good for you.

Tell me my mind
works too fast,

probably tell Usain Bolt
he runs too fast.

Excuse me. l know
you're busy ignoring me,
but my mini-bar is empty.

You think Bolt could
do the long jump?

That sport
needs to evolve,

had the same world record
for like 20 years.

l think if one guy
launched himself
head first

and right before
he hits the ground does
a front flip instead,

get three extra feet
out of that, easy.

Go be that man.

(SCREAMlNG)

My head !

You're not getting
any Haldol. Sorry.

That's Hal.
His real name is Connor,
but we call him Hal because. . .

Yeah. l got it.

We can't play that.
They keep it locked up.

l wish we could,
but at the same time,

you can imagine
how annoying that could be.

Crazy people
playing on it
all the time.

We'd never
get any peace.

Come on,
l want to introduce
you to everybody.

You think
he's serious?

He's a doctor. He knows
that acting out will only
reinforce our diagnosis.

NOLAN: Or it'll work.

You actually think
this is something
we should be concerned about?

A patient makes a threat,
you should always
be concerned.

(PATlENT CLEARlNG THROAT)

BEASLEY: There are
two new additions to
our ward. You all know Alvie.

Thank you.
Thank you.

Hold your applause.
lt's great to be back
here in Mayfield.

Not just for the food,
not just for the ladies. . .

Well, okay, maybe
just for the ladies.

And you should also
welcome Greg to the floor.

Don't worry about the name.
Just passing through.

l don't want to
break any hearts.

Can we go outside now?

Not now, Jay.

So he's claustrophobic, right?
You're claustrophobic.

Can l get a pen
to write this stuff down?

Where are you going?
Where's he going?

lt's okay.

Paranoid. Check.

Dr. Beasley, l'm having
an issue with the food.

BEASLEY: What's the problem?

l swear l'm eating
less and less

and l just keep getting
bigger and bigger.

A crayon, anybody?

We'll talk about it
another time.

l understand you all had
art therapy yesterday.

Maybe we can hang
some of the new
pieces on the wall.

Cut your wrists, huh?

Greg, there are
certain topics. . .

Oh. l'm sorry,
is suicide taboo?

Gosh, if l've broken
a rule on my first day,
l will kill myself.

Group's over.

That flew by.

You realize you're not
the first uncooperative
patient on this floor?

Really? ls there a club?

Yes. Come with me
to the clubhouse.

That didn't take long.

l'm that good.

Come on,
come on,
come on.

BEASLEY: Come on, Alvie,
let's see some action.

RlCHTER: Me! Me! Me!
Pass. Pass. Pass.

Good !

Come on, guys.

Ready to play nice?

Would you believe me
if l said yes?

No.

Then yes.

You do know
l'm trying to help you.

l also know you're
trying to be sweet,
caring and effective.

You're just not.

You want out.
Just talk, be honest,

try to work with people,
try to deal with people.

Okay.

House! House!
He's on my team.

Shut up.
Nobody likes you.

Hey. Am l crowding you?
What?

Can't see the sun?

Oh, no.
Everything's closing in.

Okay. Okay.

He's the claustrophobic one,
right?

Because l'm doing
this from memory.

You have to dribble.

Why?

ClA satellites
aren't watching me,
they're watching you

'cause you're
wearing green.

That one was
just too easy.

Seriously, anorexia?
Were you supposed
to be a girl?

And in answer to
your implicit question,

yes, those pants
do make you look fat.

How upset were you
when you woke up in the ER

and you were still
alive and a failure?

(WHOOPlNG)

Two-nothing,
good guys.

You're right.
lt is rewarding
to reach out.

You can't go up there.
lt's yard time right now.

Put it on my tab.

(MURMURlNG CONSOLlNGLY)

(PlANO MUSlC PLAYlNG)

l think you'll find music
therapy is more effective

if the patients are
inside to hear it.

Where'd you get the key?

They gave it to me.

So, if she ever talks,
are we gonna get
a German accent?

No. She's my
husband's sister.

So let him come
play the piano.

He doesn't
know how to play.

Nice. A little heavy
on the right foot, though.

See her head?
lt bobs to the music.

lt's the only real reaction
l'm getting from her.

Feels like we're talking.

You're not talking.

Her head is bobbing
to her pulse.

Are you a new doctor
on the ward?

Technically, yes.

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHlNG)

Can l lead this time?

Come on.

Leave the lid unlocked
when you're done.

(FOLK MUSlC PLAYlNG)

Can you close the door?
You're letting
all the cool air out.

lf you keep up this
scorched earth policy,

you're gonna end up
living in this room.

Are you ready
to try another strategy

or do you want me
to leave you in here?

(GRUNTlNG)

Twenty-one. Two-one.
That's game. Hey,
House is back.

DlANE: l'll get the ball.

ALVlE: Come on.
l need some meat.
l got no one left to play.

l'll play you.

Pssh, girl.
Come on, House.
You can serve.

l had some time to think
about the approach
l've been taking.

l'm new, l'm unhappy here,
and l've been taking it
out on you guys.

Unfairly.

lt was misdirected anger.

'Cause when you think
about it, the real jerks
here are the doctors.

BEASLEY: House.

You see how
they give you
a ping-pong table,

but no paddles, no net.

lt's like they're mocking you.

Preach.

The game is called table
tennis not table volleyball.

Greg, you know where
this is gonna end.

Whoever saw a tennis
court without a net?

A little run-down park
across from my apartment,
growing up.

Three courts, no nets,
no one ever used it.

No one's gonna try
to hang themselves
with a ping-pong net.

Of course not.
That's ridiculous.

lt ain't right, Doc.
You treat us like
little kids.

Little kids are allowed
to play ping-pong,
they can play the piano.

Yeah, worse
than little kids.

All right. Why don't
we just go and sit
down and discuss it?

No, no, no! No!
l want to discuss
it right here!

(PATlENTS AGREElNG)

Guys.

(PATlENTS SHOUTlNG)

Guys.

(PATlENTS BANGlNG ON TABLE)

Guys!

We want. . .

(PATlENTS STOP SHOUTlNG)

House is right.
l think everyone here
can handle these.

Seriously?

ls that your strategy?
Give everybody what
they want, except me?

You're a natural leader.

You could do something
useful down here.

For them.
Definitely for you.

Or we could keep fighting.

lf you think
you can break me,

if you think
l'm not every bit
as stubborn as you.

ALVlE: (RAPPlNG)
He came to fight the Man
And he had the master plan

But it started to unraveI
NoIan smashed him
with his gavel like...

Shut up.

So, you're gonna
keep trying to make
them miserable?

No.

New plan?

Yep.

What is it?

l don't know yet.

(RAPPlNG)
His mind is burning
The wheels are turning

The butter is churning

You think NoIan
can keep House
from strolling?

You know, it's easier
to come up with a new
plan in silence.

Right. Cool.

(EXHALlNG)

Can l hum?

l'd like you all to welcome
another new addition
to our ward. Steve.

Freedom Master.

Steve Elkerton's
just a cover.

lt's like Clark Kent
or Bruce Wayne
or Peter Parker.

Cool, we get more Jesuses
than superheroes.

Well, l try to blend in,
in the outside world,

but l figure in here
everybody gets it.

Hey, we're living
in the Ward of Justice.

Alvie.

Can you explain
a little more about what
you think everybody gets?

That there's good
and evil in the world.

And some people
are special,

and they're chosen
to help keep
evil forces at bay.

You don't think
you can stop bullets, do you?

l move out of their way.

Can you read minds?

No.

Group time, Greg.

Why isn't she talking?

She needs help.
She needs somebody
to save her.

That's what we're
all trying to do.

Let's take five minutes.
Everybody get to know Steve.

l can fly.

(ALVlE SNlCKERlNG)

l know you're scheming,

working on your
next elaborate plan
to get out of here.

Why don't you put the plan
on hold for a few days,
see what happens?

Just let me do my job.

lf you prefer private
to group, we can do that,
maybe try some SSRls.

lf you think nothing's
working, you can always
go back to your schemes.

God, if only
you'd said that
two minutes ago,

before l came up
with my new scheme.
Now l'm committed.

(LAUGHS) Get it?

(RAPPlNG)
Shaq up in my area

I'm a better baIIer
and a better rapper, what?

And l'm good
at basketball, too!

Do you have
third-floor privileges?

Ever since l shared in group
about my uncle fondling me.

ls that true?
Yeah.

And now l can use
the third-floor
vending machines.

Do you eat sour cream
and onion chips?

l mean,
the whole point
is the dipping.

Sure, we save
time by not adding

the mix to the sour cream,
but you're missing out. . .

l need you to break
into Nolan's office.

Commando style.

l want you to focus.

You want me
to mess him up?

Go into Nolan's office,
look at his calendar.

l need the name of the woman
he met with at 1 1 :00 today.

No problem.
And l'll get you
some old-school chips.

lf they have them,
l'll get you some dip,

but l've never seen dip
in the vending machine. . .

Yes, get me chips
and dip. What else?

l get it, l get it.

Plan B.
"B" is for blackmail.

l got you covered.
Commando style.

(DOOR OPENlNG)

(PLAYS OMlNOUS TUNE)

(DOOR OPENlNG)

Let me go! l just
wanted a little snack.
That ain't right.

Yo, l didn't know
the machine was moved.
l want some Ritz Bits.

Yo, l might be pregnant.
l get these cravings.

(WHlSTLlNG)

You get the name?

Nolan's schedule book just
has a big "X" marking out
the whole middle of the day.

Then we can assume the girl
he's with is called "Nooner."

(RAPPlNG) Nooner, nooner
Nolan's gonna spoon her

He's gonna fork her.

And then he's
gonna knife her

l didn't get a chance
to check the phone
or anything else.

That's okay.
l got her license plate.

l call my friend,
he gets the name,

l get the letter that
gets me out of here.

You got phone privileges?

l'm on level minus four.
l'm still writing
with a crayon.

You?
You gotta be a level five.

That's like the top
of the Space Needle.

Hal's the only one
that's up that high.

Hal's a level five?

They give him
a point every time
he clears his plate.

l've been eating
his potatoes.

Will he sell you
some minutes?

No, l pay two cigarettes
for the potatoes.

Phone's worth a lot more.

Can you cheek a pill?

No.

That's too bad for you.

You sure
you're good with this?

Yeah, yeah.
Gotta be done.

So, how do we start?

l think we just start.
Make it good.
Make it real.

Just do it already.

(ALVlE EXCLAlMlNG)

(EXCLAlMlNG lN PAlN)

Code Gray!

Give me
five milligrams of Haldol !

ALVlE: Get him off me! Hey!

Give it to him.

Dude, that was awesome.

You think Hal will
mind if they're wet?

(DlALlNG PHONE)

WlLSON: House?

No, it's your
other friend
at the asylum.

How's it going?

Hallucinations are gone,
so is the Vicodin.

How's the leg?
How's the pain?

They got me on
some non-narcotic.

l'm dealing.
l need you to run
a license plate.

Was there a hit-and-run
on your floor?

House, just do
what you're supposed to do,

listen to the doctors,
and l'll be able
to visit soon.

Track down the owner of this
car and l'll be able to visit
you. ln your office. Tomorrow.

My doctor's too smart,
too old, and too well-dressed
to only be running one ward.

He screwed up
something in his life,

and I think
he's doing it again.

l need her name,
so l can blackmail
the blackmailer.

House, he called me.

What did he want to know?

He wanted to know about you.

He wanted to warn me
that you'd be calling
for something,

and he told me if l wanted
to help you get better,
l had to let him do his job.

Yeah, well, now l'm calling
you to tell you that
if he calls you. . .

House, l'm so sorry.
l wish l could help you.

You can.

Turns out, (SlGHlNG)

you're my only friend.

(RAPPlNG) House ain't a newbie
Now he's living on this floor

And l hate you.

l'm gonna cooperate.

That's not much of a plan.
That's actually their plan.

No. l'm pretty sure
their plan is for me to
actually swallow the pills,

to actually cooperate.

(LAUGHS)

(BLUES MUSlC PLAYlNG)

l'm so proud
of my little roomie.

l only taught him
everything he knows.

One, two, three.

Okay, Stomp,
you start the betting.
Highest card wins.

That's probably
a fold. Richter?

Two cigarettes.

He's not confident, Alvie.

You can crush him.
ln the form of
a rhyme if you wanted.

(RAPPlNG) No regrets
Raise 1 0 cigarettes

Whoa. That's a lot
of nerve for someone
with a two on their head.

You're messing with me.

You can't raise 1 0,
l only have five.

Throw in your phone card.

l'm not gonna throw
in my phone card.

Can l play?

Come here.
Why?

l want to see if you've
got what it takes.

Give me your best poker face.

Too rich for my blood.
You can take my seat.

SAFER: Med time!

How are you
feeling today?

Better than yesterday,
not as good as tomorrow.

(PlANO MUSlC PLAYlNG)

l've been humming to her.

She sways.
Might be significant.

Are you ignoring me
or are you just letting
my charm wash over you?

LYDlA: Kind of tough
to play and chat.

Couple of weeks ago,
you told me

playing to her was
a complete waste of time.

You're right.
Your playing does
get worse when you talk.

l assume she loved music.

She played for
the Philadelphia
Philharmonic. Cello.

lf she responded to the piano,
she might respond even better
to the cello.

l play a little.

Hmm.

Maybe l'll bring one
in Tuesday. Thank you.

Different desk.
Different doctor.

You've been on meds
for a while now.

l'll be checking in with you
periodically to see if we
need to adjust your dose.

Any dry mouth?
Trouble sleeping?

No.

Can l go now?
There's a manic out there

with a fresh carton
of cigarettes and
he's a terrible bluffer.

lt's nice to see
that you and Alvie
are friends again.

Tell me about your fight.

He hit me, l hit him back.

Repeat until pulpy.

Alvie told me you
instigated the thing.

That tends to be
the way fights work.

Different interpretations
of the same circumstances.

Very understanding attitude.

There's that tone again.

You're smart.

How come every time
you compliment me,
it sounds like an accusation?

You're not having
any side-effects from
your meds, which is unusual.

lt's not that unusual.

The story about the fight
isn't adding up.

Why don't you
stop pretending that you
haven't reached a conclusion?

You don't trust me.
Actually, it's more
fundamental than that.

You don't like me.

l didn't say that.

You think l'm not
taking my meds.

Are you?
Yes.

So, what do you want me to do?
Want me to take a urine test?

Will that earn your trust?

Actually, yeah.

Have at it.

A little dignity, please.

You know the rules.
l have to watch.

Yes, but you don't have
to have court side seats.
Can l at least use a stall?

(UNZlPPlNG PANTS)

(SlNGlNG)
For he himseIf has said it

And it's greatly to his credit

That he is an Englishman

He is

An Englishman

(FLUSHlNG)

Get it while it's hot.

l'm sorry l doubted you.

Freedom Master,
think you could
help me out?

You need help?
Of course. That's what l do.

Great. Could you move
the piano for me?

Five hundred pounds
is not too much, is it?

ls there something
trapped underneath or. . .

No, l just want
to move it away
from the window.

l'm sorry, my powers
aren't for frivolous. . .

Just one quick lift.

Why are you doing that?

House, it's none
of your business.

l'm just curious,
as a doctor.
What are you doing?

Either he is Freedom Master
and he shouldn't be here

or else he's suffering
from a serious and
dangerous delusion

that he needs
to deal with.

So legit medical reasons.

You're not just trying
to break the guy because
he's a little different.

He's not different,
he's delusional.

Can you help me out?

What is she looking at?

You're not
a superhero, Steven.

You're just a regular
person, that's okay.
l can save her.

We're all just regular
people. lt's what
we do with that. . .

They stole her voice box.
They have it in there.

That's what she's staring at.
That's what she's staring at.

She's always staring at. . .

Your wife is dead.

Good can defeat evil.

Not every time. Evil people
killed a lot of good
people that day.

You couldn't save her.
No one could save her.

lt's in there.
Her voice is in there.
Her voice is in there.

Code Gray.

Her voice is in. . .

(STEVE EXCLAlMlNG)

Her voice is in there!
Her voice is in there!

(STEVE EXCLAlMlNG)

Don't do it.

l'm not doing anything.

You're thinking.

Things go from thinking
to doing way too fast
in this place.

Keep thinking,
you're gonna wind up
with no mo in your mojo.

l'm thinking
of hitting you again.

You hate Medina,
you hate all of them,
you want to hurt them.

You gotta keep pretending.
Step away from the hate.

What's the difference
between pretending to
cooperate and cooperating?

Pretending is pretending. lt's
not real, you don't mean it.

l sat and watched while
he did something stupid
and pointless.

l cooperated.

ln a few days,
you won't have to watch
because you're going home.

You'll be getting
your job back.

SAFER: Everybody, inside.

Closing ceremonies,
everyone attends.
One of you is going home.

BEASLEY:
lt's been a great week.

A number of you have made
tremendous strides.

But today we're here
to congratulate Susan.

(ALL APPLAUDlNG)

We are proud of her.
We wish her well
and we hope

to never see her again.
ALL: To never see her again.

(ALL CHEERlNG)

BEASLEY: lsn't it pretty?

Where's Freedom Master?

He isn't able to take part.

Get out there.
He said everybody
has to get out there.

(HlTTlNG BED WlTH CANE)
Talk. Say something.

Dr. House,
leave him alone.

Did you drug him?

Of course
l didn't drug him.

He's in flat affect.
He's practically catatonic.

Hey, we got cake.

He's fine.

Double chocolate.
Yummy, yummy.

Don't tell me
that he's fine!
You did this!

He was functioning.
He was happy.

He was delusional.

Yeah. He's way better off now.

NOLAN: Dr. House.

Let's talk.

ALVlE: Thinking sucks.

l'm not allowed
to get angry?
They screwed him up.

And for the record,

l am two privilege
levels above Susan.

l got the same
depression scale score.

Every patient is different.
lt's not about scores
and levels and. . .

Happiness is happiness,
the test is the test,
coping is coping.

And you think you're. . .
Absolutely!

l need to address
some deeper issues,

which l could do on
an outpatient basis.

Three hours a week?

That's just my opening offer.
lf you want to counter,
l'll likely fold.

No.

"No" is not an argument.

You trying to frustrate me?

No.

"No" again?

l can cope. l'm coping.

ln fact, l'm coping
better than you think.

l've not been taking
my meds. Not one.

And yet l still scored
a "high-functioning"
on your depression test.

So your proof
of your well-being
is that you lied?

Manipulated.

My proof is that
l can fool the test,
l can fool you,

which means
l am high-functioning.

l'm sane, rational, capable.
l should not be here.

These are your
pills from today?

l'm not gonna take it.
l'll just cheek it again.

Lick it.

You want me
to lick your hand.

l washed.

lt's sugar.

Your test results were
improving too regularly
and too quickly.

l was concerned
that you weren't
taking your pills,

that it was all an act.
So l switched you
to a placebo

to see if your improvements
would continue.

Your psych tests
told me nothing,

but your urine tests
told me you were faking.

You need to stop
fighting the system.

You need to let me
do my job.

(DOOR CLOSlNG)

So, what's the next plan?

There is no new plan.

l'm out of plans.

So, what do we do?

We stop talking.

l see you got some
cello in your trunk.

No, it's not a euphemism.

Are you spying on me?

l'm living in
a psychiatric hospital.

Staring out of the window
is what we do.

l assume you'll need
help carrying it up.

l still got
grounds privileges.

And who's going to
carry you when you're
carrying the cello?

Yes, cast aside
the useless cripple.
How very German of you.

Seriously. The thing weighs
a ton with that case.
l think l'll need a dolly.

Or we could ask
Clark Kent to pitch in.

The dolly's
probably easier.

The dolly already
feels good about itself.

He was a happy-go-lucky
superhero until they told
him he has no powers.

You let him help out,
he feels good about himself,

might be less depressed.

(SlGHlNG)

So, why do you
put your life on hold

to visit your sister-in-law
five times a week?

Am l somehow a bad person
for showing compassion?

No. You're not even
a bad person for lying
about why you're doing it.

Oh, that is impressive.
That is a superhuman feat.

(STEVE GRUNTlNG)

Why don't you take
a rest before you fly
that thing up to the ward?

He's still depressed.
Give me your car keys.

You gonna dangle them
in front of him
to entertain him?

l'm gonna make him
feel like he's flying.

l'll just drive him
around the grounds,
top down, wind in his hair.

Seriously? You're
gonna say no to that?

(SlGHlNG)

Why are you
so nice to me?

l think you have
a good heart.

Would you still be
nice to me if l told
you that l lied?

l'm not just driving
around the grounds
in your convertible.

l'm kidnapping him
and stealing your car.

You sure?

l was just starting
to feel a little heat
between us.

Thought we had kind of
a Bonnie and Clyde
thing going there.

Bonnie and Clyde
get shot to pieces.

Hmm. See you.

(BLUES MUSlC PLAYlNG)

You can do this.
And if you hold my hand,
l can do it, too.

(MACHlNE POWERlNG UP)

(LAUGHlNG)

(UPBEAT MUSlC PLAYlNG)

(WHOOPlNG)

Don't let go!

Going up!

(WHOOPlNG)

(LAUGHS)

(BELL RlNGS)

(WHOOPlNG)
Freedom Master is back!

Keep it down,
Freedom Master, you're
scaring the good citizens.

That was the coolest
moment of my life.

lt was fun.

You can repay me
by telling Nolan
he's an idiot.

Smell that fresh air.
And the warmth of
your yellow sun.

We do enjoy it.

Careful of the traffic.
Don't want to go
damaging any fenders.

Hey! Hey!
Come on. Get down.

There's no cry for help.
There's no cat in a tree.

Thank you, Greg.

No!

NOLAN:
He's lucky to be alive.

He's got a lacerated spleen,
rotational pelvic fracture,

compound break
of the femur and humerus.

Everything in your life
has been about finding
the truth,

but suddenly, with this guy,
you decide to reinforce
a sick man's delusions.

You just wanted to take
a swing at me. Hmm?

You don't care
about getting out,
you don't care about him.

You don't even
care about the truth.

(LAUGHS HUMORLESSLY)

You don't care
about anything, House.

l'm transferring you
to Winslow Psychiatric.

You'll have better luck
pulling the wool over
their eyes. l'm done.

Don't.

l need help.

(SlGHlNG HEAVlLY)

So, how is this
supposed to work?

You sit. l sit. We talk.

About what?
About whatever you want.

You want me to whine
about my mother?

Do you want to whine
about your mother?

l could tell you about
the time l was five
and my goldfish died.

lf that's where
you'd like to start.

l've had a billion things
happen to me in my life,

how am l supposed
to know which ones
are relevant?

As far as l'm concerned,
they're all relevant.

Well, we better get moving
'cause this session
could take 50 years.

Yes, you are the sum
of everything that's
happened to you,

and, yes, some events
are more relevant
than others,

but the only way
we can figure out
which ones are is to talk.

So, tell me,
what's on your mind?

What do you want?

l want to get better.

Whatever the hell that means.

l'm sick of being miserable.

So you'd like to be happy?

Again with the reflecting.
Yes, l'd like to be happy.

Being happy is
an excellent goal.

Not many patients
can crystallize

exactly what
they're hoping
to get out of this.

Well, bully for me.

So, now all
we have to do

is figure out how
to get you from
here to happy.

SSRls? That's your
genius technique?

l don't think we
should ignore any
tools that can help.

l know you don't
have a problem
taking drugs.

For my leg. For pain.

Well, think of this
as being for psychic pain.

l don't want to
change who l am.

Miserable?

You think that by
taking meds you'll
lose your edge?

Stop making the unique
connections that make you
a successful doctor?

lf Van Gogh
was your patient,

he'd be satisfied
painting houses instead
of the Starry Night.

Van Gogh would still be
making inspired paintings
of the night sky,

just maybe not from
the room of his asylum.

You don't know that.

l know both his ears
would be intact.

And l know his life
would be better.

l know this doesn't
come naturally to you,

but you want my help,
which means you need
to trust me.

Hmm.

Delicious.

Why are you here?

Waiting for my
communion wafer.

You're cheeking it, right?

Nope.

Tell me you're
cheeking it.

l swallowed it.

No, you didn't.
We don't take meds.

You don't take meds, Alvie.

l decided to get sane.

You're scamming again.
You can tell me.

l'm not scamming, Alvie.

They broke you.

They didn't break me.
l am broken.

And stop worshipping me
and go worry about
your own loser life.

l hate you.

Prom?

Got an assignment for you.

Role playing?

l'm not sure how
pretending to be
a businessman

with a foot fetish
is going to help,
but l'm game.

Have you connected
with any of the
other patients?

You've been here
four weeks.

Tell me about
your relationships
with the other patients.

Diane is convinced
that Silent Girl hates her.

Richter is not as
paranoid as you think,

he just likes
that you think that,

and my roommate hates me.

Only one of the
things you said

indicated how somebody else
feels about you. So. . .

l'm sure
they've done some form
of rudimentary analysis on me,

concluded that l'm a jerk.

You know, there is a way
for them to find out
things about you

without deductive reasoning.

l have had relationships.

You've screwed up
relationships.

Every one of them.
Almost like that was the goal.

l want you to trust people.

Try.

Get dressed.

(BAND PLAYlNG JAZZ)

Just open up?

Just open up. Trust.

Strangers?

We'll start with strangers,
then work our way up.

lf it helps,
l find "Hello" to be
an excellent ice breaker.

Hi.

lt's like hello,
only shorter.

Yes.

Glad we were able
to save that time.

Judging by the fancy suit,
l'd say you were a donor,

but the nervous demeanor says
maybe you've had issues,

probably that's
why this place has
personal meaning.

But this is supposed
to be about me.

l take advantage
of my friends.

Friend, really.
l've only got one.

lt can be tough sometimes.

l'm not gay.

Neither am l.

Actually, l am.

See that guy over there?

He's my lover.
He's also my psychiatrist.

Which some would argue
is a little inappropriate,

but they just don't know
what love is. Am l right?

You're not gay.
No.

But l have to tell
intimate secrets
to people.

Maybe they should be true.

Hadn't thought of that.

To be on the safe side,
l should probably do both.

Starting with the fun ones.
Come on, let's get me better.

(PATRONS CHATTERlNG SOFTLY)

Hi.

l'm a philanderer.

Oh.

Philanderer doesn't mean
that l give a lot to charity,

it means. . .

l know what it means.

You were asking me
if there were any nuts
in the hors d'oeuvres.

What?

Honey.

What did my husband
just say to you?

l was asking him
if there were nuts
in the hors d'oeuvres.

Then where
is your EpiPen?

My what?

No one with an allergy
would walk around
without an EpiPen.

Give me your purse.
No.

Give me your purse.
Stop. No.

What really
happened is. . .

l thought he was cute.
l hit on him.

We're going.

NOLAN: You having fun?

l did connect with one guy,

but then my propensity
for screwing things up
overtook me.

Then my desire to have fun
overcame my propensity.

You didn't screw it up.

The assignment wasn't
to get you to trust people
with a piece of your soul,

the assignment
was to teach you
that you can trust.

Did any of these people
rat you out as the
obnoxious womanizer

or the porn producer
that they think you are?

Why do you think that
people would treat you
worse if they knew the truth?

Good night, Doctor.

Are you in trouble?

Apparently not.

So, what's next?
You wanna be my pimp?

Why don't we just talk?

Okay.

How come you weren't
pissed at me for
stealing your car?

lt was a nice thing to do.

Hmm. l'm not sure about
the German-English
translation of "nice."

The stealing was nice
or the ruining of
Freedom Master's life?

What you did
was misguided
and irresponsible,

but it was also nice.

You gave him a moment
of pure happiness.

You asked me why
l come here so often
to visit Annie.

She was my best friend.

Then she started pulling
away from everybody.

The doctors don't know why.

l think
l married her brother

because he was the only
other one who was going
through the same thing.

But he stopped visiting
after a couple of years.

l just couldn't stop.

l miss her.

l should go.

Good night.

So, what happened?

You're talking to me now.

No.

(EXHALlNG)

Was it fun?

Yeah.

She kissed me.

Don't read into the phrasing.
We kissed each other.

And how do you
feel about that?

How do l feel about that?
lt was a kiss.
Kisses are good things.

Okay.

That was a loaded "okay."

Not at all.
Why would you assume that?

You're being judgmental.

lf l'd said that l had some
delicious Chilean sea bass
for dinner last night,

would you say,
"And how do you
feel about that?"

lf the sea bass
was married, l might.

(LAUGHS) See,
you're being judgmental.

lsn't that against
your code or something?

l'm simply
stating the obvious.

lt's complicated,
not just because
she's married

and not just because
you're institutionalized.

l know you spent the last
1 2 hours trying to figure
out what that kiss means.

Who was that woman
you were with
in the parking lot?

When you deflect,

it's more effective when
you're not that transparent.

Obviously you have
no problem with infidelity.

You're trying to rationalize
that if it's okay for
your doctor, it's okay.

But just for the record,
l am not having an affair.

Then who is she?
Why do you think
you're working so hard

to figure out the details
of my personal life?

Might not have to work
so hard if there were
some personal items in here.

You've got one number
on speed dial, it says "Dad."

Come on,
how old are you?

Why are you so afraid
to talk about this?

l want to talk about you.
l want to know who
l'm taking advice from.

l'm not giving you advice,
l'm asking you questions.

l think that kiss
meant a lot. l think
that scares you.

l think there are
no personal items in here

because you have
no personal life.

How do you think
you and Lydia will end?

You are a lonely man.

You've screwed up
every opportunity
you've had in life.

What's the ending
to this story?

(EXHALlNG)

l don't know.

Visiting time.

Why did you kiss me?

(LAUGHlNG) How many
reasons are there?

l like you.
lt felt like a nice way
of showing you that.

(PLAYlNG PlANO)

(DOOR OPENlNG)

(SAFER GlVlNG ORDERS)

NOLAN: How'd it
go with Lydia?

l found out she can
only be happy so long
before the catatonic guy

with two broken limbs
rolls off the elevator.
Philosophically speaking.

Why do you value
your failures more
than your successes?

My mother caught me
masturbating to
pictures of her mother.

Can we get past
these cute deflections?

Successes only last until
someone screws them up.
Failures are forever.

So you accept that fact?

You accept that there's
nothing you can do?

Okay. l accept the fact
that there's nothing l can do.

Now what can l do?

You acknowledge failure
and you move past it.

You apologize.

Wow.

Powerful things,
these apologies.

You get someone
to jump off a building,

you say two words
and you move on
with your life.

Hardly seems fair.

ls that the issue?

You caused him pain.

lf the world is just,
you have to suffer equally?

(NOLAN CHUCKLlNG)

You're not God, House.

You're just another
screwed-up human being
who needs to move on.

Apologize to him.
Let yourself feel better.

Then you can
learn to let yourself
keep feeling better.

Hey.

BEASLEY: Dr. House.
Everything okay?

Yeah.

Time for group.
Group time, everybody.

l have a surprise.

Two weeks from today,
we're going to have
the Mayfield Talent Show.

Talent show?
Who's in it?

l'd really love it
if everybody here
could participate.

RlCHTER: But then
who's gonna watch?

The staff will come.
Friends and family.

Are you going to tape this?

No, it's just for us.

Well, if it's just for us,
l vote we don't do it.

Think of it as
a fun way to work on
our therapeutic issues.

Alvie, maybe you could
sing one of your songs.

l don't sing, l rap.

Okay. Well,
you can write
something just for us.

l don't write.
l just do. Freestyle style.

l think you're gonna
wanna be prepared.

Make something special.

Always special.

How about you, Diane?
ls there something
you'd like to do?

l don't have any talents.

Sure, you do.
You all do.

Steve, don't you think that
Diane has hidden talent

that we'd all like
to see come out?

You really think
he's going to answer?

Eventually.
Why?

Because things pass.

Things change,
doesn't mean they get better.

You gotta make
things better,

you can't just keep talking
and hope for the best.

Diane, maybe you
and l can work together
and figure something out.

l can save him.

"They stole her voice box."
That's what he said.

That's what
she was staring at.

That's why he's staring.

Dr. House, please.

Because there's
a music box in there.

Orderly.

Come on,
just give it to me. l can. . .

l'm not having
a psychotic break.

l promise you this will work.

lt's that blue box
on the top shelf.

This is what you wanted.
This is what you needed.
A voice.

You thought you could cure
Silent Girl with this.

So by your own rationale,
it should cure you.

There's nothing
wrong with you.
You're healing.

All the parts work.
Just speak.

Come on. Speak.
Say something.

l think maybe
everyone should
take a break now.

You're trying to fix,
instead of moving on.

l brought Dvorák.
Four hands.

What?

l need to know
what this is.

lt's sheet music.

l told you. lt's just
two people having fun.

There's two possible outcomes.

lt ends, someone gets hurt,
or it doesn't end and
someone gets hurt.

So the end sucks,
it doesn't mean
the beginning has to.

Everything ends, life ends.
lt doesn't mean that
we can't enjoy it.

l can't. . .
l can't do this.

All l know is l was
happy five minutes ago,
and now l'm not.

How is that better?

(SlGHlNG)

Goodbye, Lydia.

l'm really worried
about ECT.

Apprehension's normal.
Has anyone else had it?

They shocked me, man.

(MlMlCKlNG ELECTROCUTlON)

Thanks, that's
very reassuring.

l don't know if
l should do it.

Just do the treatment
or shut up.

Greg, there's a process.

Yes, a process.
Wouldn't want to disrupt
the process with results.

Hizzy had a rough
night last night.

Guess he decided to
go back to being an ass
instead of a hypocrite.

BEASLEY: Let's move on.

Alvie, are you
making any progress
writing your rap?

Yeah. But really, no.
l just don't want to
write my songs down,

it takes all the
spontaneity out of it,
it's not of the moment.

Alvie, if you
write things down. . .

(RAPPlNG)

When the time comes,
my rhyme comes
When my spotlight shines...

Yeah. You're a genius.
Rhymes with penius.

Sorry to interrupt,
Dr. Beasley. Dr. Nolan
asked me to give you this.

ls this a day pass?

He'd like to see you.

(DOOR OPENlNG)

Thanks for coming.

l was hoping you
could take a look
at my dad's chart.

A consult?
What happened?

You went through
every sane doctor
in town?

l thought
you wouldn't mind
getting off the ward.

The cleaning lady
found him on
the kitchen floor.

Doctors here don't
think that he'll recover.
That l should pull the plug.

l want a second opinion,
so l thought l'd be
a fool not to call you.

Lacunar infarct converted
to hemorrhagic stroke.

He squashed his brain.
They didn't miss anything.

That's what l thought.

That's what you knew.

His brain has been
replaced by blood.

lt's over, and it's obvious
to any doctor who looked
at that scan. Even a shrink.

You want someone
to tell you that what
you need to do is okay.

You need permission.
Absolution.

Not now, House.

You have
no friends, no family.

At some point,
you made a mistake,
you lost everything.

And now l'm
the closest thing
you got to a friend.

Just shut up.

l don't need you here
to play this game.

(LOCK BEEPlNG)

(LYDlA CRYlNG)

l'm sorry
l pushed you away.

lt's what l do
when l'm afraid.

(LYDlA CHUCKLES)

Again, the German-English
translation may be
a little off.

l'm not crying
because of you.

l'm crying because
l'm pathetic.

l brought her cello.
ln case she magically
wakes up for the show.

Well, then l take
the apology back.

(LAUGHS)

We're all pathetic.
lt's what makes
everything interesting.

l'm sick of life
being interesting.

(PANTlNG)

(POP MUSlC PLAYlNG)

(ALL CHEERlNG)

(SlNGlNG) You're nobody
'til somebody loves you

You're nobody
'til somebody cares

(ALL CHEERlNG)

Ladies and gentlemen,
the one, the only,
Juan AIvarez!

Yo, yo, what's up? Ward Six is
jumping off, y'all.

Give it up for DJ Richter
on the ones and twos.

Yo, DJ Richter, spin that.

(DRUM BEAT STARTS)

(RAPPlNG)
Welcome to Mayfield
Where the day feels long

We act strong
But there's got
to be something wrong

See, we got hidden taIents
You don't see hidden secrets

lf we could show you those...

(RAPPlNG)
Then we wouIdn't
have no regrets

Wanna know my secret?
Sit back and Iet me expIain it

My Pop split, Momma got sick
Cliché, ain't it?

Now l'm a manic Hispanic
l'm trying to make it work

But the doctors
think l'm lazy...

And my roommate is a jerk

Dr. House is
in the house, y'all

Give it up for Dr. House
to the stage, y'all

Paging Dr. House
to the stage, y'all

Are you there, Dr. House?
lt's on, bring it on, on

Oh, yo, he's coming
to the stage, y'all

It's Dr. House on the remix
Dr. House on the remix

Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo

They say to take their pills
They say don't be a creep

But how can l get better...

lf l can't get no sleep

You gotta think before you act
in order to progress

lf you don't make
connections then your
whoIe Iife is a mess

(ALL LAUGHlNG)

Yeah, so tell me, Doctor
what l really gotta know

How do l get better?

Just do a taIent show!

(ALVlE EXCLAlMlNG)

Oh, weII, I guess
l'm just a mess, yes!
Preach it to me, brother

A Iife of restIessness

But at Ieast
we have each other!

We got each other!
We got each other!

Like two brothers
from another mother

Duck and run for cover
Ward Six

(ALL CHEERlNG)

How are you doing?
You hanging in there?

Usually, l open with that.

Thanks for staying.

So, what do you
want to talk about?

Things are actually. . .

Actually good.

You're not just saying
that because you don't
want to complain

in front of the guy
who just lost his father?

l'm not that cured.

l still got stuff to do,

but l'm good.

l'm sorry.

l was trying
to prove a point.

l was trying to be right.

l ended up putting you
in a dangerous situation,

and l was not equipped
to handle it.

And you got hurt,
and it's my fault.

And l'm sorry.

SAFER: Med time.

l'm going to try
one of those pink
ones today. You?

(SOFT MUSlC PLAYlNG)

Thank you.

You're welcome.

Got a surprise.

(ANNlE PLAYlNG CELLO)

(ALL APPLAUDlNG)

Today we're here
to congratulate Annie.

We are proud of her,
we wish her well,
and we hope to

never see her again.
ALL: Never see her again.

(ALL CHEERlNG)

lf you go silent
for over a decade,

you don't just get
to slide right back
into society.

She's going to a rehab
facility first. ln Arizona.

Her family's moving there.

l'm sorry, House.
l just found out myself.

l want an overnight pass.

l can help you with this.

l've earned it.
You have, but. . .

lsn't extending trust
part of the whole
"getting me better" thing?

lf you insist on a pass,
l'll give it to you.

But l know where
you're going and l know you
haven't thought it through.

We need to sit down
and talk about this.

(SlGHS)

Please give me the pass.

(RlNGlNG DOORBELL)

Hi.

Hello. Who are you?

l'm. . .

Ben, go inside, okay?

You didn't say anything.

And now Annie's leaving,
and l hear you're
going to Arizona.

My husband travels
to Phoenix a lot,

his corporate
headquarters are there.

We've been wanting
to move for years,

but we've been
tethered here.

Now we're not.

l don't want you to go.

l don't want to go.

But l can't break up
my family.

l can't leave my children.

l just don't
want it to change.

l'm sorry that l didn't
come to say goodbye.

l thought it ended
kind of perfect.

l have to go.

(UNLOCKlNG CAR)

Not the most exciting use
of the overnight pass
l've ever seen.

She left.

And

l'm lost.

(SlGHlNG)

l'm gonna
write your letter,

to the medical board,

recommending that
they give your license back.

You can't just console me
by giving me a lollipop
when l skin my knee.

Two things
just happened.

You got hurt, which means
you connected to someone else

strongly enough to miss them.

And more important,
you recognized the pain

and came to talk to me,
instead of hiding from it
in a Vicodin bottle.

The fact that
you're hurting
and you came here,

the fact that you're
taking your meds, and
we're talking right now.

Come inside and
get some sleep.

Tomorrow, you can start
saying your goodbyes.

Today we're here
to congratulate Greg.

We are proud of him,
we wish him well,
and we hope to

never see him again.
ALL: Never see him again.

House.

(PATlENT WHOOPlNG)

(ALL CHEERlNG)

Back off.
People already
think we're gay.

(ALL LAUGHlNG)

(ALL APPLAUDlNG)

(ALL LAUGHlNG)

(SOULFUL MUSlC PLAYlNG)

(KNOCKlNG ON WlNDOW)

What do you need, Alvie?

My meds.

l want to get better.