Hot in Cleveland (2010–2015): Season 4, Episode 21 - Corpse Bride - full transcript

- HOT IN CLEVELAND
IS RECORDED

IN FRONT
OF A LIVE STUDIO AUDIENCE.

- [chuckles softly]

- YOU TWO
ARE SUSPICIOUSLY QUIET.

WHAT ARE YOU UP TO?

- WE'RE THINKING OF JOKES.

CRAIG OLSON
AT THE SENIOR CENTER

IS TURNING 100.

ELKA AND I ARE DOING A ROAST.

- A ROAST?

AT THAT AGE, ARE YOU SURE
IT ISN'T A CREMATION?



SO WHAT DO YOU HAVE SO FAR?

- "I'M NOT SAYING
CRAIG HAS AN ENLARGED PROSTATE,

"BUT IF HE PUT A HAT ON IT,

HE COULD DRIVE
IN THE CARPOOL LANE."

BOOM.

- MY TURN.

"I'M NOT SAYING CRAIG LOVES
GOING ON CRUISES,

BUT LAST MONTH
HE WENT TO THE BAHAMAS."

SEE, IT'S FUNNY
BECAUSE IT'S TRUE.

- MAMIE, IN A ROAST
YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO TAKE

AN ELEMENT OF THE PERSON
YOU'RE ROASTING

AND EXAGGERATE IT
FOR COMIC EFFECT.

- YEAH, FOR INSTANCE,
IF I WAS GOING TO ROAST ELKA,

I MIGHT SAY,
"I'M NOT SAYING ELKA'S OLD,



BUT SHE BABYSAT JESUS."

- I'M NOT SAYING
JOY'S FLAT-CHESTED.

BUT I SAW A PICTURE
OF HER BREASTS ON A MILK CARTON.

- VERY FUNNY.

- BECAUSE THEY'RE MISSING.
- GOT IT.

[cell phone chimes]

[sighs]

- JOY, IS THAT
FROM YOUR MOTHER AGAIN?

MAYBE YOU SHOULD TAKE IT.
- NO.

I MEAN, I'M SURE IT'S
JUST ABOUT HER LATEST BOYFRIEND.

IF I WANTED TO HEAR
AN OLD WOMAN BITCH ABOUT MEN...

- YOU'D JUST STAY HOME
AND LISTEN TO YOURSELF?

- OKAY, WE BETTER GET GOING

IF I'M GONNA BREAK UP WITH HARRY
BEFORE WE GO TO THE MOVIES.

- WHO'S HARRY?

- OH, HE'S JUST THIS GUY I'VE
BEEN TRYING TO BREAK UP WITH

FOR THE LAST FEW WEEKS.

- SO WHAT'S WRONG WITH HIM?

- OH, HE'S NICE.

HE'S JUST, YOU KNOW,
WAY TOO INTO ME.

AND HE OVERPRONOUNCES
SPANISH WORDS.

LAST NIGHT,
HE MADE ME TAH-COS.

AND HE TALKS TOO MUCH.
HE JUST GOES ON AND ON AND ON.

I HAVE NEVER GOTTEN THROUGH A
CONVERSATION WITHOUT ZONING OUT.

AND I DON'T MEAN
TO SOUND SUPERFICIAL,

BUT HE'S REALLY HAIRY.

AND HIS NAME IS HARRY,
SO THERE'S NO GETTING AROUND IT.

[knock at door]
HARRY?

HARRY, THE DOOR WAS OPEN.

HARRY, DON'T BE SCARED.
IT'S JUST ME.

HARRY.

OH, MY GOD!

[upbeat music]

?

OH, MY GOD.
OH, MY GOD.

- ARE YOU ABSOLUTELY SURE
HE'S DEAD?

- HE'S LYING IN BED
ICE COLD.

- MY HUSBAND DID THAT FOR YEARS,
AND HE WASN'T DEAD.

DID YOU WHISPER IN HIS EAR

HOW MUCH YOU WANT TO HAVE SEX?
- OF COURSE NOT.

- SOMETIMES IT'S THE ONLY WAY
YOU CAN KNOW FOR SURE.

- DID HARRY EVER MENTION
BEING ILL?

- I DO KIND OF REMEMBER

DURING ONE
OF HIS LONG, RAMBLING SPEECHES

HE SAID SOMETHING
ABOUT A HOLE IN HIS HEART.

I THOUGHT HE JUST MEANT
HE WAS LONELY.

UGH, I JUST WISH HIS COUSIN
WOULD GET HERE SOON.

- I'M NOT SAYING
MELANIE'S A HEARTBREAKER,

BUT THERE'S A DEAD GUY
IN THERE.

TOO SOON?

- HEY, WHAT'S THIS?

"TO MY DARLING MELANIE.

LOVE, HARRY."

IT'S A RING.

- OH, I TOLD YOU
HE WAS MOVING TOO FAST.

- WELL, HE'S NOT MOVING
TOO FAST ANYMORE.

- I'D SAY 3 KARATS.

- OH, JUST PUT THAT BACK.
- YOU SHOULD OPEN IT.

- I CAN'T OPEN A GIFT
FROM A DEAD MAN.

- HE PROBABLY BOUGHT IT
WHEN HE WAS STILL ALIVE.

- NO.
I WOULD FEEL LIKE A BAD PERSON.

- NOT ME.
[gasps]

- OH!
OH, CLEAR, SQUARE-CUT,

PLATINUM SETTING.
THAT'S MY DREAM RING.

- TRY IT ON.

- NO. AGAIN.
BAD PERSON.

- HOW ELSE WILL YOU KNOW
FOR THE FUTURE

IF IT'S A FLATTERING STYLE
FOR YOUR FINGER?

- OKAY, I'LL TRY IT ON,

BUT JUST FOR THE RECORD,
I DO NOT FEEL GOOD ABOUT THIS.

OH, IT'S SO PRETTY.

- IT IS STUNNING.
[knock at door]

- OH, THAT'S HIS COUSIN.

OKAY, EVERYBODY,
LOOK SAD.

OH, MARGARET,
I'M SO SORRY.

- OH, MELANIE,
YOU POOR THING.

EVEN THOUGH WE ALL KNEW
WITH HARRY'S HEART CONDITION

HE COULD GO AT ANY TIME,
YOU MUST BE DEVASTATED.

[gasps]

OH, MY GOD.

GRANDMA'S RING.

HARRY PROPOSED
AND YOU ACCEPTED?

DARLING,
WELCOME TO THE FAMILY.

- MOM, I DON'T WANT IT,

AND I DON'T WANT
TO TALK ABOUT HIM ANYMORE.

NO, I HAVEN'T TOLD MY FRIENDS
ABOUT IT.

MELANIE JUST WALKED IN.
GOT TO GO.

- GUESS WHO'S HOSTING
HARRY'S WAKE.

- WHAT?

- I WAS OUT CASKET SHOPPING

WITH HIS FAMILY--
OH, MY GOD,

THEY'RE ALL LONG TALKERS.

I ZONED OUT, AND I THOUGHT
SOMEONE ASKED ME

IF I WAS AWAKE.

TURNS OUT THEY ASKED ME
IF I WOULD HOST THE WAKE.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING
TUESDAY NIGHT?

- OOH, BUSY.
- YEAH, GOOD,

'CAUSE IT'S WEDNESDAY.

- I HAVE A MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENT
TO MAKE.

THIS BOX IS FROM
THE OZAWA INDUSTRIAL BROTHERS.

- THE LADYPANTS PEOPLE?

- YOU'RE GONNA WEAR DIAPERS
AGAIN?

- THEY WEREN'T DIAPERS.

THEY WERE ABSORBENT PANTS
FOR WOMEN ON THE GO

WHO NEED TO GO, AND I WAS PROUD
TO ENDORSE THEM.

PLEASE DON'T BE DIAPERS.

PLEASE DON'T BE DIAPERS.
- PLEASE BE DIAPERS.

PLEASE BE DIAPERS.
- PLEASE DON'T BE DIAP--

OH, THANK GOD.

IT'S AN EXERCISE BELT.

- THAT YOU PEE IN?

- OH, GOD,
I HOPE NOT.

"DEAR CHASE VICTORIA,

"INTERNATIONAL FACE
OF INCONTINENCE...

"LET US SAFELY
AND EFFORTLESSLY

"ELECTROCUTE YOUR ABDOMEN
INTO SHAPE

"WITH NEWEST OZAWA BROTHERS
PRODUCT,

"MRS. LADY ABS.

ALSO ENCLOSED
IS YOUR CHECK MONEY."

OH, MY GOD.
LOOK AT ALL THOSE ZEROES.

OH, I COULD REALLY USE
THOSE LADYPANTS RIGHT NOW.

[cell phone rings]

HELLO.

OH, HI, MS. SCROGGS,
HOW ARE YOU?

- [silently] I'M NOT HERE.
- OH--NO.

REJOYLA'S NOT HERE.
SHE'S...AT THE CIRCUS.

BECAUSE SHE'S FRIENDS
WITH THE TRAPEZE LADY.

I'LL JUST TELL HER
YOU CALLED.

HOW AM I GONNA GET
THROUGH THIS EVENING?

I AM A TERRIBLE LIAR.

- YOU DID OKAY WITH
THAT TUESDAY-WEDNESDAY THING.

- GUESS WHO'S WEARING SOMETHING
WONDERFUL THAT NO ONE CAN SEE?

- IT'S CALLED A BRA.

GET OVER IT.

- I WAS REFERRING
TO MY MRS. LADY ABS TONING BELT,

WHICH IS SENDING THOUSANDS
OF TINY ELECTRICAL PULSES,

TIGHTENING MY ABS
AS WE SPEAK.

AND THE BELT IS SO SMOOTH

THAT N-N-N-NOBODY KNOWS
YOU'RE WEARING IT.

- VICTORIA, WHAT NUMBER
DID YOU SET THAT THING ON?

- WELL, LAST NIGHT
I COULD HARDLY FEEL IT,

SO I TURNED IT UP
TO THE HIGHEST SETTING,

"SUPER MAX-FRY MUSCLE SCRAMBLE,"

AND I GUESS IT GOT STUCK
ON THE N-N-N-NUMBER.

- COME ON, MAMIE SUE,

WE'VE GOT A ROAST TO GO TO.

- RIGHT.
HERE'S YOUR DRINK.

- PERFECT.

- WAS THAT STRAIGHT VODKA?

- I LIKE TO BE LOOSE
BEFORE I DO A SET.

- SO THAT
WAS HARRY'S SEVENTH BIRTHDAY.

OH, I DIDN'T TELL YOU
ABOUT THE CAKE.

IT WAS CHOCOLATE.

NO, IT WAS WHITE
WITH CHOCOLATE FROSTING.

NO, WHAT AM I THINKING?
THAT WAS A PIE BIRTHDAY.

- COULD I STEAL MELANIE
FOR A SECOND?

- YES, PLEASE.

- I HAVE A BIG PROBLEM.

DR. GREENLY IS HERE.

- WHO?
- THE SHRINK I HAD

TO STOP SEEING
'CAUSE I WAS HAVING

ALL THOSE SEXY DREAMS
ABOUT HIM.

- OH, WHERE?
- OVER BY THE FIREPLACE.

DON'T TURN AROUND.

AH, HE SAW ME.
HE'S COMING OVER.

- HI, JOY.
THIS IS A SURPRISE.

- YES.
THIS IS MY FRIEND MELANIE.

- MY HEART GOES OUT TO YOU.

- WHY?
OH--

THANK YOU.

- HARRY WAS A PATIENT
OF MINE.

HE SPOKE AT GREAT LENGTH
ABOUT YOU.

- I BET HE DID.

- MELANIE,
COME MEET COUSIN BETH.

SHE'S JUST FLOWN
IN FROM MEJICO.

- SO, JOY...

- SO, DR. GREENLY...

- I DON'T MEAN
TO PUT YOU ON THE SPOT,

BUT I ALWAYS WONDERED WHY YOU
SUDDENLY STOPPED SEEING ME.

WE WERE MAKING
SUCH GREAT PROGRESS.

YOU KNOW, REALLY GETTING
INTO SOME OF THE ISSUES

THAT YOU HAD WITH YOUR FATHER.

- CAN I BE PERFECTLY HONEST?

- OF COURSE.

- I KNOW
IT'S THE BIGGEST CLICHE,

BUT I CAN TELL YOU NOW SINCE
YOU'RE NO LONGER MY DOCTOR.

I WAS ATTRACTED TO YOU.

- OH.

WELL,
I GUESS I CAN TELL YOU,

SINCE YOU'RE NO LONGER
MY PATIENT,

THAT I WAS ATTRACTED TO YOU.

- WOW.

- YOU KNOW,
SPEAKING NOT AS DR. GREENLY,

BUT JUST AS A GUY NAMED JOHN,

WOULD YOU LIKE
TO HAVE DINNER SOMETIME?

- I WOULD, JOHN.

BUT COULD I SPEAK TO DR. GREENLY
FOR JUST ONE SECOND?

- SURE.

HOW CAN I HELP YOU, JOY?

- DR. GREENLY,
GIVEN MY HISTORY WITH MEN,

DO YOU THINK I SHOULD DATE
MY FORMER THERAPIST?

- I DO.

WOW, THAT GUY SEEMED
REALLY SMART.

- JOY, COULD I SEE YOU
IN THE KITCHEN?

- RIGHT NOW?
- YES, RIGHT N-N-N-NOW.

- I NEVER HOSTED A WAKE BEFORE.

DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG
THESE THINGS GENERALLY GO?

- OH, NOT LONG.

PEOPLE SHOULD START
TO DRIFT OUT

SOON AFTER YOU GIVE
THE EULOGY.

- THE SHOCKS ARE GETTING WORSE.

- I CAN'T GET IT OFF.
THE LATCH IS BROKEN.

- GUESS WHO'S GIVING
THE EULOGY.

- SERIOUSLY?

- YOU SAID YOU'D GIVE
THE EULOGY?

- I DON'T REMEMBER DOING IT,

BUT HIS FAMILY IS SO BORING.

YOU ZONE OUT, AND WHEN
THEIR MOUTHS STOP MOVING,

YOU JUST NOD YOUR HEAD.

- SO NOW SAY NO.

- I CAN'T.
JASON IS DEPENDING ON ME.

- WHO'S JASON?
- I DON'T KNOW.

WHAT AM I GONNA SAY?

- WELL, I DON'T KNOW.

BUT IF I DON'T GET
THIS THING OFF SOON,

YOU'RE GONNA BE GIVING
MY EULOGY.

- SEE, YOUR EULOGY
WOULD BE FUN TO WRITE.

I HAVE GENUINE FEELINGS
FOR YOU.

HARRY'S FAMILY IS EXPECTING

A GRIEVING FIANCEE EULOGY,

AND THE TRUTH IS
I BARELY KNEW THE MAN.

WHY DO I SMELL POPCORN?

- I TRIED TO GET THIS THING OFF

BY BUTTERING MYSELF,
AND NOW I'M COOKING.

- SO AS A PROFESSIONAL
YOU WOULDN'T DATE ME

IF I WAS REALLY SCREWED UP,
WOULD YOU?

- STOP FISHING.

[cell phone chimes]

- SORRY.

OOF. IT'S NOTHING.
IT'S MY MOTHER.

- AT THE RISK OF SOUNDING
LIKE DR. GREENLY,

WHEN YOU SAY IT'S NOTHING,

IT'S OFTEN BECAUSE YOU'RE
AVOIDING SOMETHING.

- ISN'T IT SOMETIMES HEALTHY

TO AVOID SOMETHING YOU KNOW
IS GONNA MAKE YOU FEEL BAD?

- NOT IF IT KEEPS YOU
IN DENIAL.

- LOOK, I KNOW
WHERE YOU'RE GOING WITH THIS,

BUT I'VE DEALT WITH IT.
I'M FINE.

- SO YOU'RE SAYING
BEING AT A FUNERAL RIGHT NOW

ISN'T TRIGGERING
ANYTHING FOR YOU?

- LOOK, IF DR. GREENLY
KEEPS ASKING QUESTIONS,

JOHN IS NOT GONNA GET LUCKY
TONIGHT.

- TONIGHT?

LOOK, I JUST BROUGHT
DR. GREENLY

'CAUSE HE'S A FRIEND
OF MY SISTER'S.

- TECH SUPPORT
PUT ME ON HOLD AGAIN.

- OKAY, LISTEN,
HERE'S WHAT I HAVE SO FAR.

WEBSTER'S DEFINES EULOGY
AS A SPEECH IN PRAISE

OR HONOR OF A DECEASED PERSON.

- WEBSTER'S DEFINES DULL
AS ANY SPEECH

WHICH STARTS
WITH "WEBSTER'S DEFINES."

YES, YES, TECH SUPPORT.

I'M STILL HERE.

NO, I ALREADY TRIED
BUTTERING MYSELF.

YES, THIS IS MRS. LADYPANTS.

NO, I AM NOT GOING
RIGHT N-N-N-NOW.

- HEY, I THOUGHT YOU GUYS
WERE ROASTING

YOUR 100-YEAR-OLD FRIEND.

- THEY SAID OUR MATERIAL
WAS TOO RAUNCHY.

- ONE ZINGER
ABOUT CRAIG'S LOW-HANGING FRUIT,

AND THEY FREAK.

- NOW WE HAVE
ALL THIS KILLER MATERIAL

AND NOWHERE TO SHOWCASE IT.

- WHAT'S THE CROWD LIKE
OUT THERE?

- DON'T YOU DARE!

IT'S A WAKE.

- MELANIE, JASON IS HERE.

IT'S TIME TO GIVE
THE EULOGY, SWEETIE.

- OH, GOOD,
JASON'S HERE.

I'LL BE RIGHT OUT.

WELL, I'M ABOUT TO GO OUT THERE
AND DISAPPOINT THEM ALL.

EVEN JASON.

WHOEVER THE [bleep] THAT IS!

- FOR THOSE OF YOU
I HAVEN'T MET, I'M JASON.

I WANT TO THANK MELANIE
FOR HOSTING THIS SPECIAL NIGHT

AND FOR GRACIOUSLY ALLOWING ME
TO SPEAK BEFORE HER.

- OR, IF YOU LIKE,
INSTEAD OF ME.

- WHAT A CHARACTER.

NO WONDER DAD LOVED YOU.

- DAD.

YOU KNOW, RELATIONSHIPS
WITH FATHERS CAN BE COMPLICATED.

- ARE YOU OKAY?

- I'M FINE.

- HE WAS MY COMPASS,

MY TRUE NORTH.

I ALWAYS KNEW THAT,
IF I COULD FIND HIM,

I COULD FIND MY WAY.

AND LAST WEEK WHEN HE ASKED ME

TO BE THE BEST MAN
AT HIS WEDDING,

I WAS SO HAPPY
BECAUSE--

BECAUSE HE WAS THE BEST MAN
THAT I HAD EVER KNOWN.

CAN'T BELIEVE
I'M NEVER GONNA SEE YOU AGAIN.

I LOVE YOU, DAD.

- JOHN, I NEED YOU
TO BE DR. GREENLY AGAIN.

- LET'S TALK.

- AND NOW MELANIE
WILL GIVE THE EULOGY,

AND GET YOUR HANDKERCHIEFS
READY.

DAD TOLD ME
SHE HAS THE SOUL OF A POET.

- WEBSTER'S DEFINES EULOGY--
- [screams]

JUST LETTING OUT THE GRIEF.

YOU'LL JUST EXCUSE ME.

- OH, THANK GOD
YOU CAUGHT ON FIRE.

YOU SAVED ME.

- YEAH, THAT'S WHY I DID IT.

- SERIOUSLY, NOW I HAVE
TO FOLLOW THAT SPEECH?

I'M IN AGONY.
- OH, REALLY, MELANIE?

AGONY?
WHAT IS THAT SMELL?

FRESH-COOKED HAMBURGER?
STEAK ON THE GRILL?

NO, IT'S MY FLESH!

- CALM DOWN.
I'VE ALMOST GOT IT.

THERE.
- OH, THANK GOD.

HEY, DO I LOOK MORE TONED?

NEVER MIND.

- I CAN'T BELIEVE
PEOPLE BUY THESE THINGS.

I MEAN, EVERYONE KNOWS YOU
CAN'T GET FIT WITHOUT EXERCISE.

- IT IS THE NUMBER ONE
EXERCISE BELT IN JAPAN.

AND, WHETHER OR NOT IT WORKS,
PEOPLE ARE BUYING THE DREAM.

AND THEY'RE HAPPY WITH THAT.

- SO YOU'RE
STILL GONNA ENDORSE IT?

- WELL, OF COURSE.

I MEAN, THERE IS NOTHING WRONG

WITH TELLING PEOPLE
WHAT THEY WANT TO HEAR

IF IT MAKES THEM HAPPY.

- YEAH, YOU'RE PROBABLY RIGHT.

ACTUALLY, YOU ARE RIGHT.

- I AGREE.
BUT WHY?

- THOSE PEOPLE OUT THERE
WANT TO BELIEVE

THAT HARRY DIED HAPPY
BECAUSE OF ME.

AND I HAVE TO TELL THEM
WHAT THEY WANT TO HEAR.

YOU DID A LOT OF EULOGIES
ON EDGE OF TOMORROW.

ARE THERE ANY THAT MIGHT FIT?

- HMM.
LET ME SEE.

SAYING GOOD-BYE TO A SISTER
IS NEVER EASY,

EVEN IF SHE WAS MY EVIL TWIN.

NO.
ALPHONSE WILL ALWAYS BE

A PART OF ALL OF US BECAUSE
WE HAD TO EAT HIM TO SURVIVE.

OH, I THINK
THAT'S CLOSER.

- HEY, JOY.

HONEY, WHAT'S WRONG?

- I WAS OUT BACK
WITH DR. GREENLY.

THERE'S SOMETHING
I HAVE TO TELL YOU.

MY FATHER PASSED AWAY
A FEW MONTHS AGO.

- OH, JOY.
- HONEY, WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL US?

- HE TOOK OFF
WHEN I WAS A TEENAGER,

AND NOT A WORD SINCE.

I DIDN'T WANT TO GET SYMPATHY
FOR FEELINGS

I WASN'T FEELING
OR DIDN'T WANT TO FEEL.

THAT'S WHY MY MOTHER'S
BEEN CALLING.

HE LEFT ME SOMETHING.
ONLY, I'M NOT SURE I WANT IT.

BUT LISTENING TO JASON
TALK ABOUT HIS FATHER

WITH SUCH LOVE...
I'VE ALWAYS HAD THIS FANTASY

THAT SOME DAY MY DAD AND I WOULD
SOMEHOW MAGICALLY RECONNECT

AND HAVE THE RELATIONSHIP
I ALWAYS WANTED.

THEN IT JUST HIT ME.

THAT CAN NEVER HAPPEN NOW.

THAT FANTASY DIED WITH HIM.

- AH, HONEY,
THAT'S HARD.

- SO DR. GREENLY TOLD ME
TO WRITE DOWN

WHAT I WANTED TO SAY TO HIM.

- YEAH, WHAT'D YOU WRITE?

- "DEAR DAD,
I'M ANGRY.

"I'M ANGRY
THAT YOU'RE NOT HERE.

"I'M ANGRY THAT YOU LEFT ME

"BEFORE WE HAD A CHANCE
TO BE EVERYTHING

WE COULD BE TO EACH OTHER..."

- "BUT MOSTLY I'M ANGRY
THAT THE DREAMS I HAD

"FOR OUR RELATIONSHIP
WILL NEVER COME TRUE.

"I CAN ONLY CONSOLE MYSELF

"WITH THE FEW MEMORIES
I DO HAVE--

"YOUR RICH, BOOMING LAUGH,

"AFTER DINNER
SITTING ON YOUR LAP,

THE HINT OF WHISKEY
ON YOUR BRE..."

- HE DID LOVE HIS WHISKEY.

- "THERE IS SO MUCH
I'LL NEVER GET TO SAY TO YOU.

"BUT I WANT YOU TO KNOW
I MISS YOU

"MORE THAN YOU'LL EVER KNOW.

I LOVE YOU, DADDY."

I CALLED HIM DADDY.

BUT NOT IN THE CREEPY WAY.
IN THE SEXY WAY.

YOU KNOW,
LIKE, "WHO'S YOUR DADDY?"

YOU KNOW, SOMEWHERE,
SOMEHOW,

I DO BELIEVE THAT THE MAN

THIS SPEECH WAS WRITTEN FOR
HAS HEARD THESE WORDS

AND HE IS SMILING DOWN
AT HIS GIRL.

- "DEAREST REJOYLA,

"I HOPE THIS PORTRAIT
WILL SERVE AS A REMINDER

"THAT EVEN THOUGH HE MAY NOT
HAVE ALWAYS SHOWN IT,

"YOUR FATHER LOVED YOU
VERY MUCH.

"I DO HOPE THIS GIVES YOU
SOME HAPPINESS AND PEACE.

LOVE, MUM."

- AW, THAT'S SWEET.

- "P.S. NOW THAT
YOUR PSYCHIC WOUNDS HAVE HEALED,

PERHAPS YOU CAN FIND A MAN."

- OH.
- OHH.

- HE EVEN MADE YOUR HANDS
PROPORTIONATE TO YOUR BODY.

CLEARLY HE CARED.

- HE REALLY DID.