Hemlock Grove (2013–2015): Season 3, Episode 8 - Episode #3.8 - full transcript
Well, I can't thank you enough
for arranging this
on such short notice.
At times like these,
we have to move quickly
and stick together.
So true.
Well, I've climbed
Mt Everest twice,
and that's not something
one does on one's own.
Beating this disease is...
..it's an even taller mountain
to climb.
Well, think of Godfrey as
the Sherpa on whose back, um...
..Hillary...somebody
rode to Everest's summit.
Huh.
Well, Sir Edmund didn't actually
ride on Tenzing Norgay's back.
Well, however he got there,
we'll be right there with you.
Right.
Norville Knox.
Godfrey's very own Tenha Norway.
Dr Johann Pryce, of course.
I'm an aficionado of your work.
Your paper
on glycosylated haemoglobin
led to some delicious advances
by my own team.
It is an absolute honour
to meet you, sir.
May I congratulate you
for having utterly
transmogrified philanthropy
from a guilt-driven hobby
of the privileged
to a dynamic
and transformative tool
that, when systematically
deployed
as you have done with
such insight and discipline,
has activated and energised
the scientific community
to levels of discovery
and innovation
never thought possible.
Why don't you just blow the guy?
At least a dick
in his obsequious little mouth
would shut him up.
What?
Well, I'm delighted
that a man of your stature
is just looking
into this wretched disease.
- Now, is Dr Pryce...
- Upir? No.
Though the body count
he's racked up
beats both of ours, combined.
In the name of science,
of course.
Uh, may I?
Yes, please. By all means.
I'll ask you to keep the fawning
to a minimum
when it's me in that body.
No. You're not planning... Him?
Handsome? Check. Upir? Check.
Rich? Double check.
When you called, you said he was
coming to help. I thought...
I was sitting next to him
on his plane.
What else was I supposed to say?
If we wipe his brain, it'll
destroy everything I believe in.
So it's a short list, then.
This man is responsible
for shaping the future
of our civilisation
through his patronage
to science.
And yet, somehow that future
never seemed to include you.
No. I have access
to the Godfrey funds.
The White Tower.
I want for nothing.
Use your imagination.
His resources. His facilities.
They could all be ours.
Well, yours.
Or I'll just feast on him.
The scientific community
will crumble
without his largesse,
I will die
without a surrogate body,
and your demonic perversions
masquerading as science
will be exposed
for the whole world to see.
Impressive discovery,
Pryce.
With our combined resources,
this thing doesn't stand
a chance.
Quite so.
Uh. Ugh!
Jesus, Johann!
Be a little more careful
with my new body,
will you, please?
It's not yours. Not yet.
Certain threats were made
about sharing the fruits
of my labour -
'atrocities' I believe you
called them -
with the authorities.
I'm putting my life
in your bloody little hands.
Some insurance is only prudent.
When I'm certain you've held up
your end of the bargain,
I won't need leverage.
I'll perform the transfer.
You turn over whatever
information you have.
Do we have a deal?
I need to hear you
say the words.
Oh, for fuck's sake! You're
such a suspicious little prick.
Yes, we have a deal.
This is your Destiny.
I already know
why you're calling,
but if you're feeling
redundant,
state your need after the beep.
Dee? Honey? I got us breakfast.
- She's not here.
- Where is she?
She didn't come home last night.
I thought maybe
she crashed at your place.
Well, she didn't.
Where could she be?
After all the lies
you've been telling her,
maybe she's on a bender.
Destiny wouldn't do that.
And I came here to tell her
the whole story.
Which version?
Bet your ass is covered,
no matter what crock of shit
you and Baj are telling, anyway.
I'm here every morning,
and I watch her cry
until there's nothing left.
I listen to her trying
to figure out how her cousin
could break her heart like this.
I'm there for her.
And you?
Ride or die?
Go fuck yourself.
I can't go back in time.
I can only find her
and make things better.
You want to know what Destiny
was like before you showed up?
She was happy.
And all you found out
about this cabin
is that it's not
in Connecticut?
With Spivak's connection
to Essex and Plum Island nearby,
it seemed reasonable
to assume that...
Quit your yammering.
You have nothing.
I do not have nothing.
I've a blinding headache
and a fucking facial tic
from playing 'Where's Waldo'
for the last 37 hours straight.
Do you think I give a fuck?
If you can't find this place,
I'll shitcan you myself
and find someone who can.
You gonna kill me now?
I'm not a murderer.
Go on. Get it over with.
I'll make it easy for you.
I'm not a murderer.
You saw what happened.
She came in here
shrieking at me
after I was almost gunned down.
Then she hit me.
And I shouldn't have
hit her back,
but no way did I mean for...
- What about after that?
- She was dying.
If Peter saw her like that,
it wouldn't have mattered
if it was an accident or not.
He would have come after me
until one of us was dead.
And he wouldn't have stopped
with just me.
You were there, too.
I didn't have a choice.
You have to understand that.
I understand, Roman.
I do.
I didn't mean to hurt anyone.
But you did,
and you'll have to learn
to live with that.
I took many lives
when I was finding my way.
It wasn't until I turned my life
over to the will of God
that I was able
to accept myself...
..in spite of what I'd done.
Penance.
Atonement.
Forgiveness.
These aren't just words.
That shit doesn't work for me.
A fucking priest man
told me so himself.
I don't know
what this priest told you
or what you think you heard,
but I do know this -
"There are many rooms
in my father's house."
Room for me?
I'm 100% certain
there's no room at the inn.
Fuck.
Remember what happens
if he finds out.
To him. To you.
Destiny didn't come home
last night. Is she here?
I haven't seen her
since the funeral.
Please excuse me.
Sorry I have to leave so soon
but I'm late for an appointment.
What about you?
Did she reach out to you?
No, she didn't.
Destiny probably just needs
some space after all this.
She'll turn up.
Come on,
I got something to show you.
- This was in Trevor's head?
- So was I.
I saw all of it.
The cabin, Spivak, everything.
- This is big.
- We're so close.
We should head over
to the White Tower
and keep the pressure on them
to find this place.
I can't do anything
until I know where Destiny is.
I gotta say,
I think you're overreacting.
This is the break
we've been waiting for, Peter.
I'm not gonna be any use to us
until I'm sure she's OK.
What happened to your hand?
The shooting in the boardroom.
I told you.
Destiny's a grown-ass woman.
What are you so worried about?
Everything.
I'm worried
she went to the cops,
and they're keeping her
on ice somewhere,
or Milan got to her,
and now Spivak's going around
lighting up on people.
Who the fuck knows
what happened to her?
She already went
after Milan once.
If he gets a whiff that
I do not have her under control,
she's gonna be fucked.
So if she's planning on taking
another run at this prick...
Yeah. What am I supposed to do?
Ring his doorbell and say,
"Hey, by the way,
"my cousin's gonna try
and murder you again,
"in case you haven't
taken her out already."
I have another approach.
Have as much as you want.
It's crabapple juice.
Supposed to be
an anti-oxidant...
..which, I guess,
is a good thing.
I wasn't snooping.
This palace is for the enjoyment
of all who enter within.
Oh.
I was worried about you.
Where have you been?
I needed a think, a deep one,
which I do best
when I'm by my lonesome
and...when I have
my thinking cube.
That's my re-imagining
of a cultural icon.
Blue, symbolising, uh...
..blue.
What did you need
to think about?
Butterflies.
Butterflies?
Hmm.
The monarch butterfly
congregates in May and
during the warmer months
because of its fondness
for milkweed.
I was thinking about hitting
the road, getting a look-see.
Supposed to be a sight
so beautiful it moved God
to invent the eyeball,
so we could see it.
You're leaving?
I was hoping to change that
to the first-person plural.
The two of us.
Open road. Butterflies.
We could leave tonight.
I sense reluctance.
They treat me bad enough
around here.
Why would it be different
anywhere else?
I'm a big freak.
I believe it was Jimi Hendrix
who urged us
to wave our freak flag high.
You, being taller than most,
are ideally suited
to do just that.
It's time for you
to get out there.
Go some of those places
you've only read about.
I'd be honoured mightily
if you'd have me
as your fellow traveller.
Big decision.
Yeah, as decisions go, probably.
Which will require a think...
..and this.
Olivia.
Olivia?
Congratulations.
The transfer was a success.
Meet the new you.
Oh, my God.
I'm...
- I'm...
- What is it?
Visual discrepancies?
Blurred vision? Haloing?
I'm...I'm a fucking hunk.
I take that you mean
your condition is satisfactory?
Oh.
Better than satisfactory.
I feel...I feel healthy.
Oh, it's been so long,
I'd forgotten what it's like.
And my mind.
Mmm.
I've got my mind back.
Oh, that little bastard
is finally gone.
What little bastard?
Never mind.
Oh.
Wow. This is what
all the fuss is about?
I'm swinging one of these,
now I'm just plain better
than every woman on the planet?
I could get used to this.
Ooh! Mmm. Ooh!
Mmm.
Sheesh.
Doesn't take much
to get it excited.
You'll have the rest of
your unnaturally long life
struggling to avoid
all the trouble
your new friend gets you into.
But right now it's time
to follow through on our deal.
You get rid of your leverage.
Then we get rid of the old you.
Snuffed out in our sleep
after such a valiant struggle.
Sad.
No, but here you are,
ready to carry the torch.
It's not a...death.
It's more like a rebirth.
Still, I'd like
to do something for her.
Send her out on a high note.
And what exactly
did you have in mind?
I need to take the new body
out for a test drive
before you 86 the old one.
God knows she could use a lay.
Your narcissism
truly knows no bounds.
After you've...finished,
I expect you to hold up
your end of the bargain.
Yeah, sure. Fine.
Whatever you want.
Then, by all means, Olivia...
..go fuck yourself.
Olivia.
Are you...
Are we...
Did it work?
Mommy, you have no idea.
Mmm!
Mmm. Mmm.
Ugh!
What? What?
However, comma, previous
experiments have resulted
in spontaneous neural
decompensation, comma,
possibly resulting in death,
which would be...
..highly desirable
and cause for celebration.
Don't listen to him.
It is a blemish. That's all.
I'm not telling you anything
we didn't already know.
I am not horrific!
OK! I overstated the case,
but, dear girl, you and I
both know you're not well.
I warned you
that this would happen.
Did you have a better idea
to keep me alive? No.
Both of you, stop it.
Johann, she is bat-shit crazy.
'Crazy' is not a dispositive
term, medically speaking.
She's arguing
with an imaginary friend.
I'm pretty sure that qualifies
as crazy pretty much everywhere.
I am still here, and you are
gonna treat me with respect,
because without me,
you would not be me!
Everybody pipe down!
Identity dissonance
would not be an issue
if we'd got rid of the old
anatomy, as I'd recommended.
Hmm. You're right.
We need to get rid of this
thing, the sooner, the better.
Oh. First you want to fuck me,
and now you want
to throw me away.
You really are
the perfect male specimen.
Maybe next time
you'll listen to Chango.
There is a reason
I'm revered as a demigod.
Honey, look...
..this is what we wanted.
I mean, I'm healthy
for the first time
in who knows how long.
And I can see,
I can really see
what this disease
has done to us.
Is it really that bad?
Can't you see that we just
want what's best for you?
Do not patronise me.
Olivia, meet Olivia.
Hardnosing the highway?
Aitor's leaving town.
You're going with him,
of course?
I'm thinking about it.
Dumpster-dived this.
Not sure I can fit
everything in it, though.
Always better to pack light.
Not sure I want to go.
Finally have somewhere I belong.
I have friends.
You got to put your tag
in different cities
if you want to be a legend.
- I don't want to be a legend.
- You pretty much already are.
Girl falls down,
next thing you know
she's got 2 million views.
How is that even possible?
Nacho tweeted the link
to Snoop Dogg. Got his co-sign.
Another million hits, who knows?
He'll be rolling up here
wanting to produce your shit.
What shit?
You put this place on the map.
So, why would I want to leave?
You got to take this energy
that you got someplace new
and make your mark there.
And when you do, that place'll
tag you right back.
- You feel me?
- No.
I don't think I'm cut out
for that kind of life.
You owe it to yourself
to find out.
Damn. Still missing something.
Butterflies.
That's real spit.
I have run every test,
checked for cerebral ischemia
by monitoring
microcirculatory blood flow,
NAHD fluorescence.
Do you ever wonder
if he just makes this shit up?
Will you close your yap?
I'll handle him.
You asked me a question.
I answer it.
You tell me to close my yap.
I don't care
what your tests say.
Something's not right with him.
I know firsthand
how disconcerting it can be
to take a cold, hard look
at one's self,
and you, of all people...
It's a living nightmare.
Trust me.
But the fact is,
this was a successful transfer.
You want me to believe
that thing has all my thoughts,
all my memories,
everything that makes me me?
Unfortunately for him, yes.
But, Olivia,
we've been through this.
Oh, she understands
perfectly well how this works.
The old anatomy
is just getting cold feet.
I am not letting you
get rid of me
until I know for sure
that me is the real me.
- You want to test me?
- Sure.
OK.
Take your best shot.
Ask him what our first
leading role was.
What was our first leading role?
- Lady Macbeth.
- Easy.
The real you would know
how you got the role.
That's right.
And how did we get that role?
Fucked the producer
every Sunday
after the matinee
for the run of the show.
And he would weep
every time he orgasmed.
Mm. Detail I'd just as soon
forget.
Oh, Chango must be
throwing a holy shit fit
about this transfer business,
'cause he needs to find
another idiot's imagination
to become a figment of.
Is that proof enough for you?
If she wants to stick around,
who cares?
Just let her suffer
and die a horrible death
while I'm living large
and getting more ass
than a toilet seat.
There! I would never
say something that vile.
You're just jealous
because you know it's true.
I'm hitting my stride,
and you haven't walked
into a room and turned heads
since the Volstead Act
was repealed.
- You conceited bastard!
- Hey, hey! Enough, enough!
Enough, enough, enough.
Nobody is going anywhere,
as long as this
sword of Damocles
is hanging over my head.
Well, I'll make the call for you
and end this little blackmail.
I know everything she knows.
The individual entrusted
with chapter and verse
of his many crimes
against humanity
answers only to Olivia Godfrey.
Mm-hm.
- The real Olivia Godfrey.
Mm.
Olivia, if you want
to stick around
and watch nature run its course,
I can't stop you,
but there's something
I think you'd like to see.
Really, Johann? More rat porn?
What you're about to see
is a test subject
in the advanced stages of
the disease, much like yourself.
And he kills
all of his friends. I know.
Now, this one goes
a step farther.
After rewiring the brain
of the host
to prey upon its own species,
the disease triggers
a complete self-cannibalisation.
All part of Spivak's plan,
no doubt,
to eradicate
the entire upir species.
In a few days,
or maybe a few hours,
this will be you.
This is what I'm trying
to spare you from.
The transfer worked.
Your legacy is secure.
Don't you want to go out
in a manner
of your own choosing?
This is not gonna happen to me.
It can't.
Olivia, have the good sense
to know when you've won.
We're looking for Destiny.
Fuck!
You have no idea the shit rain
you cockroaches walked into.
Your entire bloodlines -
Rumancek, Godfrey -
are about to become extinct.
Yeah, I know who you are.
He thinks he knows who we are.
- Funny, huh?
- Mm.
Are you ready to take us
seriously now?
God, our father,
your power brings us to birth.
Your providence
guides our lives.
And by your command,
we return to dust.
Lord...
..those who die
still live in your presence.
Their lives change,
but do not end.
You're welcome to stay
as long as you like.
That's what the Lord's house
is for.
Is there anything
I can do to help?
You can pray for me, Father.
What...
..what the fuck are you?
You tell us everything
we need to know
and you'll never
have to find out.
I never saw your cousin...
..but I can help you find her.
What? Putting up flyers?
I'll call Luka.
He's the guy I had watching her
ever since she tried
to stick a knife in me.
You keep tabs on your enemies
if you want to survive.
He makes one phone call,
his crew's gonna swarm on us.
I could have took out
your whole fucking organisation
for what Andreas did,
but you convinced me
to listen to reason.
Don't throw that away
on account of something
I had nothing to do with!
He's lying. He's lying.
We don't know that.
I offered to help,
not get myself killed.
If I get the slightest itch
that you're lying...
I'm not.
- ..or you try to bolt...
You're gonna call your guy
and if she doesn't turn up...
So make this call count.
Hey, Peter,
is this Andreas' watch?
You said it was a Panerai.
When I find Destiny, I'm gonna
make sure that she gets this.
I'll set you up
with a slow morphine drip
until you fall asleep,
and then I will gradually
increase the dosage
to make your transition
as peaceful as possible.
That doesn't sound
too unpleasant.
Well, if sudden cardiac arrest
from drug overdose
is your thing.
Everything that I said before...
You know us.
We speak without thinking
how our words affect those
that we care about the most.
But from where I stand,
I see a very brave woman,
and I will do my best
to live up to our legacy.
Lies.
What else is he gonna say?
"Don't let the door hit you
in the ass
"on your way
to eternal nothingness"?
Just try to relax.
You'll be dead soon.
Johann...
..I know we've had
our differences,
but I want you to know...
..you've always been
a worthy adversary.
Pass me the phone.
There's a scientist
I have to rescue
from a certain
sword of Damocles.
Do not do this. With Knox's
money, maybe we can find a cure.
The time for bargaining
has passed,
along with anger and denial.
All that's left now
is acceptance.
Wasn't much to it.
I just left a packet
with a lawyer,
along with instructions
to leak it to the press,
if he didn't hear from me
every other day.
- Skip Osaka. Put me through.
- I'm afraid he's busy.
I don't care if he's busy.
- It's Olivia Godfrey.
- Can you please hold?
I'm on hold.
You're as good
as your word, Olivia.
I'll never forget it.
He says as he jizzes his pants,
because he's free at last.
Do you remember
what Father told us
after the peasant uprising
in Moldova?
He said...he said...
..he said the pie hole
is for unloading.
And unloading... Mac-nam!
Like the Andalusian girls.
Ms Godfrey. Dr Pryce.
The specimen... I was...
Something is...
Something
is wrong here, Johann.
Like the thunder said,
someone else is in here.
Happening to me?
Ugh!
What the fuck
is going on here, Johann?
Olivia...
This was your play all along.
Get me out of the picture,
knowing full well
that gash man over here
would spaz out,
leaving you the cock
of the walk.
I...I knew there'd be risks.
There are always risks,
but the odds...
Kill, kill, kill!
I thought you two being upirs,
the genetic material
would be more than a match...
Remember this?
I'm gonna finish the job
this time.
You kill me,
there'll be no-one to keep you
from devouring yourself,
like that rat.
Gagging on your own intestines.
- Chewing on your own shit.
- Ew.
You said something about this
match not being close enough.
Anything that
significantly diverges
from your genomic synthesis
will end up exactly like that.
It's just a matter of time.
You have to admit,
it was a good plan.
When we're on the same side,
we're unstoppable,
so finding a candidate
closer to
my genomic synthesis,
are we talking family members?
Well, I would have to analyse
the nucleotide sequencing.
Get to work,
and don't fuck this up.
What about him?
Waste not, want not.
Well, then.
I'll leave you to it.
Alright, enough.
We need him alive.
Enough.
Ugh!
Destiny was here.
Where is she now?
I never saw her.
Then why did you have her ring?
This has been in our family
for generations.
What would I want
with a stone that small? Hmm?
I couldn't fence it
if I wanted to.
A trophy, like Andreas' watch.
Maybe somebody
doesn't want us truce-ing.
They're framing me.
Pitting us against each other.
And who'd want to do that?
Fucking rivals. The Italians.
- Chinatown boys. The Mexicans.
- Oh, sure.
Yeah, blame it on the Mexicans.
You?
You were over looking at my
stuff when that ring appeared.
- What are you trying to say?
- Fuck this! Fuck!
He could be telling the truth.
I mean, if he's being set up,
she could still be alive.
He was having her followed.
Your grandmother's ring
was in his dressing room.
We got to face the facts here.
Destiny's not coming back.
We don't know that.
I mean, she could have...
She could have... She could...
She could...
Oh.
I'll find out
what he did with her.
No more. No more!
I can't! I can't.
We know what you did. You don't
want to cop to it? That's fine.
I'm finishing it right now.
Let's see what
your errand boy Luka knows.
No-one followed her.
You say you always
keep tabs on your enemies.
Huh?
Either you were lying then,
or you're lying now.
Which one is it?
I read somewhere
that a broken femur
is the most painful injury
the human body can experience.
It was a fucking...
it was a fucking trap.
Yeah?
I didn't do anything
to that chick.
You know how many enemies
I have, hmm?
Destiny, she never even rated.
Fuck!
Where is she?
Jesus. Fuck.
Fuck. OK!
I'll tell you.
She...she came...
..she came looking for revenge
for what we did to her man,
just like you said,
and I put her on a plane
out of the country.
Just like we did with that whore
who was fucking Andreas.
She...she knew that it was
catch a flight or a bullet.
I didn't do anything to her.
I swear.
You're lying.
Uncle Johann.
Shelley, you have become
such a celebrity.
Well, what are you doing here?
I'm afraid
it's not a social call.
It's...about your mother.
Is she OK?
Roman told me she's sick.
She is not at all well.
If you see her coming, I need
you to call me immediately,
and promise to get as far away
as you can, no matter what.
Oh, my God.
Is she gonna be OK?
She's receiving state-of-the-art
medical attention,
which I'm overseeing personally.
Then she's in good hands.
The best.
Can you keep a secret?
I'm leaving Hemlock Grove
tonight.
This time tomorrow, I'll be
up in Maine chasing butterflies.
I don't think it's safe for you
to be travelling all alone.
Can you keep another secret?
Sometimes I fear
that's all I'm good at.
I have a boyfriend.
Now that you're here,
I'll introduce you.
I already know you'll get along.
Aitor gets along with everybody.
You are truly full of surprises.
I am...so happy for you,
Shelley.
Truly happy.
Can I share a secret of my own?
Do tell.
I've been
seeing someone myself.
What's he like?
It feels...
I don't know how to describe it.
Like you can be your ideal self
because that's what he sees
when he looks at you.
What am I going to do
without you?
Write...
..every day.
Well...
Well, where is
your special someone?
I can't wait to meet him.
I almost believed him.
He was a good liar,
but he got what he deserved.
Still, Destiny's dead
because of me.
Edge Cliff Woods.
Told me his guys
were gonna bury us there.
I swear
I didn't make him up.
No, I don't think Aitor Quantic
is something anybody
could make up.
There he is.
- Story time.
- You're gonna love this.
This is a story about a man
and three wishes.
There's no genie,
but there is a bottle,
because our man
was a drinking man.
Yeah.
And one night, he found himself
face to face
with one of his darkest fears.
This particular bottle
that had given him so much joy
and pleasure was empty.
In fact, there wasn't
a drop left in the whole house.
And no money to buy more.
That's when he made
his first wish.
He summoned all the powers
from realms seen and unseen
and wished for another bottle.
Yeah.
- Alright.
- Yeah.
And when he opened his eyes,
he saw all the empty bottles
lying around and realised
his wish had been granted.
He could take 'em to the store,
collect the deposit money,
and buy more booze.
So he jumped in his truck.
He hauled ass out of there,
but he didn't check
the rear-view as he backed up.
So he didn't see what made
the loud and terrible thunk
he heard
when the truck rolled over it.
Made his second wish.
Summoned those powers,
from realms seen and unseen.
"Please, please, please, don't
let it be the neighbour's dog."
And lo and behold,
his wish was granted.
It wasn't the neighbour's dog.
It was an old man,
just walking by.
The cause of death, tyre tracks
on or about the head.
I went to jail
for vehicular homicide.
I did my time,
but when I was released,
I thought I knew more
than the authorities,
so I skipped out on parole.
I was still suffering
from that disease of self
that got me drinking
in the first place.
I've been a fugitive ever since.
Now, this former drinking man,
this me...
..made a third wish.
I wished for something so rare,
so impossible,
the odds of me finding it
were due south of none...
..all the powers from realms
seen and unseen notwithstanding.
I wished for a soul mate.
And a woman so rare,
so beautiful and unique
came unto me...
..causing me to say,
"What's up?"
I, uh...asked her
to come away with me.
To run away
would be more accurate,
'cause I can't stay here.
I'm afraid of being caught
for what I did.
That's my disease of self
rearing its ugly head
because...because what I
was really asking her to do
was hide herself from the world.
She's already
done enough hiding.
It wouldn't be fair.
I wish things
could be different...
..but I'm all out of wishes.
So, with this siren song
as my swan song...
..I bid you all adieu.
We should get out of here.
Don't go! I love you.
Stay where you are!
Please, do not run!
I repeat, do not run!
What? It's late.
- Uh, Roman Godfrey?
- Who is this?
Yeah, hi.
This is Detective Israel.
I'm hoping you can help me
with an ongoing
homicide investigation.
I'm following up on a lead
regarding the murder
of Merrill Samis and his family.
They were found frozen to death
in South Erie last week.
I don't even know who that is.
If this is some kind of a
prank call, I'm not in the mood.
"Helmet smorgasbord."
Does that mean anything to you?
Mr Samis texted that
to your phone the day he died.
Where'd you say
you were calling from?
South Erie.
Blinsky!
I wasn't sleeping.
You weren't answering
your phone, either.
Erie. Erie, Pennsylvania.
That's where we need
to be looking.
Put it in the fucking computer!
Even with a zipcode
this would take a while.
We got him. We fucking got him!
I'm looking for some protection.
Oh, we're fresh out of condoms.
Try holding an aspirin
between your knees.
I live alone, and there
have been some break-ins
in my neighbourhood.
Say no more.
Just so happens we're having
a 'World's Gone to Shit' special
this week.
For the ladies,
the Taurus.45/.41.
Great conceal and carry.
The Smith & Wesson M&P22.
And the Sig Sauer P226.
All available
in breast-cancer pink.
Mm.
I was thinking more along
the lines of a Desert Eagle.
Recoil on a weapon
like that'll land you
on your pretty little bubble
butt back in last Tuesday.
You guys didn't think
my pretty little bubble butt
was so helpless
when we were dropped in the LZ,
to patch up Chosen Company,
2nd Battalion,
after the Battle of Wanat.
"God's own angels,"
I think the GIs called us.
Sorry about the jokes.
It's alright.
Nothing I haven't heard before.
Need some hollow points.
125 grain. Jacketed.
Jesus. What kind of burglars
are we talking about here?
The kind you drop fast,
and they don't get up.
♪ That girl sweet
as the cane in the Malibu rum
♪ With a mouth full of smiles
like 12 million suns
♪ But go messin' with her, son,
she'll put you in check
♪ With your ass in the air
and a boot on your neck
♪ Rebel Breezy ain't scared
She just throwing it down
♪ So you best come correct
or get run out of town
♪ 'Cause she swung like a G
♪ On you and your set
♪ Over, under don't matter
♪ 'Cause you lost the bet
♪ She planks so good
She planks so hard
♪ Gotta plank like her
or we both go cold
♪ We be plankin' too... ♪
for arranging this
on such short notice.
At times like these,
we have to move quickly
and stick together.
So true.
Well, I've climbed
Mt Everest twice,
and that's not something
one does on one's own.
Beating this disease is...
..it's an even taller mountain
to climb.
Well, think of Godfrey as
the Sherpa on whose back, um...
..Hillary...somebody
rode to Everest's summit.
Huh.
Well, Sir Edmund didn't actually
ride on Tenzing Norgay's back.
Well, however he got there,
we'll be right there with you.
Right.
Norville Knox.
Godfrey's very own Tenha Norway.
Dr Johann Pryce, of course.
I'm an aficionado of your work.
Your paper
on glycosylated haemoglobin
led to some delicious advances
by my own team.
It is an absolute honour
to meet you, sir.
May I congratulate you
for having utterly
transmogrified philanthropy
from a guilt-driven hobby
of the privileged
to a dynamic
and transformative tool
that, when systematically
deployed
as you have done with
such insight and discipline,
has activated and energised
the scientific community
to levels of discovery
and innovation
never thought possible.
Why don't you just blow the guy?
At least a dick
in his obsequious little mouth
would shut him up.
What?
Well, I'm delighted
that a man of your stature
is just looking
into this wretched disease.
- Now, is Dr Pryce...
- Upir? No.
Though the body count
he's racked up
beats both of ours, combined.
In the name of science,
of course.
Uh, may I?
Yes, please. By all means.
I'll ask you to keep the fawning
to a minimum
when it's me in that body.
No. You're not planning... Him?
Handsome? Check. Upir? Check.
Rich? Double check.
When you called, you said he was
coming to help. I thought...
I was sitting next to him
on his plane.
What else was I supposed to say?
If we wipe his brain, it'll
destroy everything I believe in.
So it's a short list, then.
This man is responsible
for shaping the future
of our civilisation
through his patronage
to science.
And yet, somehow that future
never seemed to include you.
No. I have access
to the Godfrey funds.
The White Tower.
I want for nothing.
Use your imagination.
His resources. His facilities.
They could all be ours.
Well, yours.
Or I'll just feast on him.
The scientific community
will crumble
without his largesse,
I will die
without a surrogate body,
and your demonic perversions
masquerading as science
will be exposed
for the whole world to see.
Impressive discovery,
Pryce.
With our combined resources,
this thing doesn't stand
a chance.
Quite so.
Uh. Ugh!
Jesus, Johann!
Be a little more careful
with my new body,
will you, please?
It's not yours. Not yet.
Certain threats were made
about sharing the fruits
of my labour -
'atrocities' I believe you
called them -
with the authorities.
I'm putting my life
in your bloody little hands.
Some insurance is only prudent.
When I'm certain you've held up
your end of the bargain,
I won't need leverage.
I'll perform the transfer.
You turn over whatever
information you have.
Do we have a deal?
I need to hear you
say the words.
Oh, for fuck's sake! You're
such a suspicious little prick.
Yes, we have a deal.
This is your Destiny.
I already know
why you're calling,
but if you're feeling
redundant,
state your need after the beep.
Dee? Honey? I got us breakfast.
- She's not here.
- Where is she?
She didn't come home last night.
I thought maybe
she crashed at your place.
Well, she didn't.
Where could she be?
After all the lies
you've been telling her,
maybe she's on a bender.
Destiny wouldn't do that.
And I came here to tell her
the whole story.
Which version?
Bet your ass is covered,
no matter what crock of shit
you and Baj are telling, anyway.
I'm here every morning,
and I watch her cry
until there's nothing left.
I listen to her trying
to figure out how her cousin
could break her heart like this.
I'm there for her.
And you?
Ride or die?
Go fuck yourself.
I can't go back in time.
I can only find her
and make things better.
You want to know what Destiny
was like before you showed up?
She was happy.
And all you found out
about this cabin
is that it's not
in Connecticut?
With Spivak's connection
to Essex and Plum Island nearby,
it seemed reasonable
to assume that...
Quit your yammering.
You have nothing.
I do not have nothing.
I've a blinding headache
and a fucking facial tic
from playing 'Where's Waldo'
for the last 37 hours straight.
Do you think I give a fuck?
If you can't find this place,
I'll shitcan you myself
and find someone who can.
You gonna kill me now?
I'm not a murderer.
Go on. Get it over with.
I'll make it easy for you.
I'm not a murderer.
You saw what happened.
She came in here
shrieking at me
after I was almost gunned down.
Then she hit me.
And I shouldn't have
hit her back,
but no way did I mean for...
- What about after that?
- She was dying.
If Peter saw her like that,
it wouldn't have mattered
if it was an accident or not.
He would have come after me
until one of us was dead.
And he wouldn't have stopped
with just me.
You were there, too.
I didn't have a choice.
You have to understand that.
I understand, Roman.
I do.
I didn't mean to hurt anyone.
But you did,
and you'll have to learn
to live with that.
I took many lives
when I was finding my way.
It wasn't until I turned my life
over to the will of God
that I was able
to accept myself...
..in spite of what I'd done.
Penance.
Atonement.
Forgiveness.
These aren't just words.
That shit doesn't work for me.
A fucking priest man
told me so himself.
I don't know
what this priest told you
or what you think you heard,
but I do know this -
"There are many rooms
in my father's house."
Room for me?
I'm 100% certain
there's no room at the inn.
Fuck.
Remember what happens
if he finds out.
To him. To you.
Destiny didn't come home
last night. Is she here?
I haven't seen her
since the funeral.
Please excuse me.
Sorry I have to leave so soon
but I'm late for an appointment.
What about you?
Did she reach out to you?
No, she didn't.
Destiny probably just needs
some space after all this.
She'll turn up.
Come on,
I got something to show you.
- This was in Trevor's head?
- So was I.
I saw all of it.
The cabin, Spivak, everything.
- This is big.
- We're so close.
We should head over
to the White Tower
and keep the pressure on them
to find this place.
I can't do anything
until I know where Destiny is.
I gotta say,
I think you're overreacting.
This is the break
we've been waiting for, Peter.
I'm not gonna be any use to us
until I'm sure she's OK.
What happened to your hand?
The shooting in the boardroom.
I told you.
Destiny's a grown-ass woman.
What are you so worried about?
Everything.
I'm worried
she went to the cops,
and they're keeping her
on ice somewhere,
or Milan got to her,
and now Spivak's going around
lighting up on people.
Who the fuck knows
what happened to her?
She already went
after Milan once.
If he gets a whiff that
I do not have her under control,
she's gonna be fucked.
So if she's planning on taking
another run at this prick...
Yeah. What am I supposed to do?
Ring his doorbell and say,
"Hey, by the way,
"my cousin's gonna try
and murder you again,
"in case you haven't
taken her out already."
I have another approach.
Have as much as you want.
It's crabapple juice.
Supposed to be
an anti-oxidant...
..which, I guess,
is a good thing.
I wasn't snooping.
This palace is for the enjoyment
of all who enter within.
Oh.
I was worried about you.
Where have you been?
I needed a think, a deep one,
which I do best
when I'm by my lonesome
and...when I have
my thinking cube.
That's my re-imagining
of a cultural icon.
Blue, symbolising, uh...
..blue.
What did you need
to think about?
Butterflies.
Butterflies?
Hmm.
The monarch butterfly
congregates in May and
during the warmer months
because of its fondness
for milkweed.
I was thinking about hitting
the road, getting a look-see.
Supposed to be a sight
so beautiful it moved God
to invent the eyeball,
so we could see it.
You're leaving?
I was hoping to change that
to the first-person plural.
The two of us.
Open road. Butterflies.
We could leave tonight.
I sense reluctance.
They treat me bad enough
around here.
Why would it be different
anywhere else?
I'm a big freak.
I believe it was Jimi Hendrix
who urged us
to wave our freak flag high.
You, being taller than most,
are ideally suited
to do just that.
It's time for you
to get out there.
Go some of those places
you've only read about.
I'd be honoured mightily
if you'd have me
as your fellow traveller.
Big decision.
Yeah, as decisions go, probably.
Which will require a think...
..and this.
Olivia.
Olivia?
Congratulations.
The transfer was a success.
Meet the new you.
Oh, my God.
I'm...
- I'm...
- What is it?
Visual discrepancies?
Blurred vision? Haloing?
I'm...I'm a fucking hunk.
I take that you mean
your condition is satisfactory?
Oh.
Better than satisfactory.
I feel...I feel healthy.
Oh, it's been so long,
I'd forgotten what it's like.
And my mind.
Mmm.
I've got my mind back.
Oh, that little bastard
is finally gone.
What little bastard?
Never mind.
Oh.
Wow. This is what
all the fuss is about?
I'm swinging one of these,
now I'm just plain better
than every woman on the planet?
I could get used to this.
Ooh! Mmm. Ooh!
Mmm.
Sheesh.
Doesn't take much
to get it excited.
You'll have the rest of
your unnaturally long life
struggling to avoid
all the trouble
your new friend gets you into.
But right now it's time
to follow through on our deal.
You get rid of your leverage.
Then we get rid of the old you.
Snuffed out in our sleep
after such a valiant struggle.
Sad.
No, but here you are,
ready to carry the torch.
It's not a...death.
It's more like a rebirth.
Still, I'd like
to do something for her.
Send her out on a high note.
And what exactly
did you have in mind?
I need to take the new body
out for a test drive
before you 86 the old one.
God knows she could use a lay.
Your narcissism
truly knows no bounds.
After you've...finished,
I expect you to hold up
your end of the bargain.
Yeah, sure. Fine.
Whatever you want.
Then, by all means, Olivia...
..go fuck yourself.
Olivia.
Are you...
Are we...
Did it work?
Mommy, you have no idea.
Mmm!
Mmm. Mmm.
Ugh!
What? What?
However, comma, previous
experiments have resulted
in spontaneous neural
decompensation, comma,
possibly resulting in death,
which would be...
..highly desirable
and cause for celebration.
Don't listen to him.
It is a blemish. That's all.
I'm not telling you anything
we didn't already know.
I am not horrific!
OK! I overstated the case,
but, dear girl, you and I
both know you're not well.
I warned you
that this would happen.
Did you have a better idea
to keep me alive? No.
Both of you, stop it.
Johann, she is bat-shit crazy.
'Crazy' is not a dispositive
term, medically speaking.
She's arguing
with an imaginary friend.
I'm pretty sure that qualifies
as crazy pretty much everywhere.
I am still here, and you are
gonna treat me with respect,
because without me,
you would not be me!
Everybody pipe down!
Identity dissonance
would not be an issue
if we'd got rid of the old
anatomy, as I'd recommended.
Hmm. You're right.
We need to get rid of this
thing, the sooner, the better.
Oh. First you want to fuck me,
and now you want
to throw me away.
You really are
the perfect male specimen.
Maybe next time
you'll listen to Chango.
There is a reason
I'm revered as a demigod.
Honey, look...
..this is what we wanted.
I mean, I'm healthy
for the first time
in who knows how long.
And I can see,
I can really see
what this disease
has done to us.
Is it really that bad?
Can't you see that we just
want what's best for you?
Do not patronise me.
Olivia, meet Olivia.
Hardnosing the highway?
Aitor's leaving town.
You're going with him,
of course?
I'm thinking about it.
Dumpster-dived this.
Not sure I can fit
everything in it, though.
Always better to pack light.
Not sure I want to go.
Finally have somewhere I belong.
I have friends.
You got to put your tag
in different cities
if you want to be a legend.
- I don't want to be a legend.
- You pretty much already are.
Girl falls down,
next thing you know
she's got 2 million views.
How is that even possible?
Nacho tweeted the link
to Snoop Dogg. Got his co-sign.
Another million hits, who knows?
He'll be rolling up here
wanting to produce your shit.
What shit?
You put this place on the map.
So, why would I want to leave?
You got to take this energy
that you got someplace new
and make your mark there.
And when you do, that place'll
tag you right back.
- You feel me?
- No.
I don't think I'm cut out
for that kind of life.
You owe it to yourself
to find out.
Damn. Still missing something.
Butterflies.
That's real spit.
I have run every test,
checked for cerebral ischemia
by monitoring
microcirculatory blood flow,
NAHD fluorescence.
Do you ever wonder
if he just makes this shit up?
Will you close your yap?
I'll handle him.
You asked me a question.
I answer it.
You tell me to close my yap.
I don't care
what your tests say.
Something's not right with him.
I know firsthand
how disconcerting it can be
to take a cold, hard look
at one's self,
and you, of all people...
It's a living nightmare.
Trust me.
But the fact is,
this was a successful transfer.
You want me to believe
that thing has all my thoughts,
all my memories,
everything that makes me me?
Unfortunately for him, yes.
But, Olivia,
we've been through this.
Oh, she understands
perfectly well how this works.
The old anatomy
is just getting cold feet.
I am not letting you
get rid of me
until I know for sure
that me is the real me.
- You want to test me?
- Sure.
OK.
Take your best shot.
Ask him what our first
leading role was.
What was our first leading role?
- Lady Macbeth.
- Easy.
The real you would know
how you got the role.
That's right.
And how did we get that role?
Fucked the producer
every Sunday
after the matinee
for the run of the show.
And he would weep
every time he orgasmed.
Mm. Detail I'd just as soon
forget.
Oh, Chango must be
throwing a holy shit fit
about this transfer business,
'cause he needs to find
another idiot's imagination
to become a figment of.
Is that proof enough for you?
If she wants to stick around,
who cares?
Just let her suffer
and die a horrible death
while I'm living large
and getting more ass
than a toilet seat.
There! I would never
say something that vile.
You're just jealous
because you know it's true.
I'm hitting my stride,
and you haven't walked
into a room and turned heads
since the Volstead Act
was repealed.
- You conceited bastard!
- Hey, hey! Enough, enough!
Enough, enough, enough.
Nobody is going anywhere,
as long as this
sword of Damocles
is hanging over my head.
Well, I'll make the call for you
and end this little blackmail.
I know everything she knows.
The individual entrusted
with chapter and verse
of his many crimes
against humanity
answers only to Olivia Godfrey.
Mm-hm.
- The real Olivia Godfrey.
Mm.
Olivia, if you want
to stick around
and watch nature run its course,
I can't stop you,
but there's something
I think you'd like to see.
Really, Johann? More rat porn?
What you're about to see
is a test subject
in the advanced stages of
the disease, much like yourself.
And he kills
all of his friends. I know.
Now, this one goes
a step farther.
After rewiring the brain
of the host
to prey upon its own species,
the disease triggers
a complete self-cannibalisation.
All part of Spivak's plan,
no doubt,
to eradicate
the entire upir species.
In a few days,
or maybe a few hours,
this will be you.
This is what I'm trying
to spare you from.
The transfer worked.
Your legacy is secure.
Don't you want to go out
in a manner
of your own choosing?
This is not gonna happen to me.
It can't.
Olivia, have the good sense
to know when you've won.
We're looking for Destiny.
Fuck!
You have no idea the shit rain
you cockroaches walked into.
Your entire bloodlines -
Rumancek, Godfrey -
are about to become extinct.
Yeah, I know who you are.
He thinks he knows who we are.
- Funny, huh?
- Mm.
Are you ready to take us
seriously now?
God, our father,
your power brings us to birth.
Your providence
guides our lives.
And by your command,
we return to dust.
Lord...
..those who die
still live in your presence.
Their lives change,
but do not end.
You're welcome to stay
as long as you like.
That's what the Lord's house
is for.
Is there anything
I can do to help?
You can pray for me, Father.
What...
..what the fuck are you?
You tell us everything
we need to know
and you'll never
have to find out.
I never saw your cousin...
..but I can help you find her.
What? Putting up flyers?
I'll call Luka.
He's the guy I had watching her
ever since she tried
to stick a knife in me.
You keep tabs on your enemies
if you want to survive.
He makes one phone call,
his crew's gonna swarm on us.
I could have took out
your whole fucking organisation
for what Andreas did,
but you convinced me
to listen to reason.
Don't throw that away
on account of something
I had nothing to do with!
He's lying. He's lying.
We don't know that.
I offered to help,
not get myself killed.
If I get the slightest itch
that you're lying...
I'm not.
- ..or you try to bolt...
You're gonna call your guy
and if she doesn't turn up...
So make this call count.
Hey, Peter,
is this Andreas' watch?
You said it was a Panerai.
When I find Destiny, I'm gonna
make sure that she gets this.
I'll set you up
with a slow morphine drip
until you fall asleep,
and then I will gradually
increase the dosage
to make your transition
as peaceful as possible.
That doesn't sound
too unpleasant.
Well, if sudden cardiac arrest
from drug overdose
is your thing.
Everything that I said before...
You know us.
We speak without thinking
how our words affect those
that we care about the most.
But from where I stand,
I see a very brave woman,
and I will do my best
to live up to our legacy.
Lies.
What else is he gonna say?
"Don't let the door hit you
in the ass
"on your way
to eternal nothingness"?
Just try to relax.
You'll be dead soon.
Johann...
..I know we've had
our differences,
but I want you to know...
..you've always been
a worthy adversary.
Pass me the phone.
There's a scientist
I have to rescue
from a certain
sword of Damocles.
Do not do this. With Knox's
money, maybe we can find a cure.
The time for bargaining
has passed,
along with anger and denial.
All that's left now
is acceptance.
Wasn't much to it.
I just left a packet
with a lawyer,
along with instructions
to leak it to the press,
if he didn't hear from me
every other day.
- Skip Osaka. Put me through.
- I'm afraid he's busy.
I don't care if he's busy.
- It's Olivia Godfrey.
- Can you please hold?
I'm on hold.
You're as good
as your word, Olivia.
I'll never forget it.
He says as he jizzes his pants,
because he's free at last.
Do you remember
what Father told us
after the peasant uprising
in Moldova?
He said...he said...
..he said the pie hole
is for unloading.
And unloading... Mac-nam!
Like the Andalusian girls.
Ms Godfrey. Dr Pryce.
The specimen... I was...
Something is...
Something
is wrong here, Johann.
Like the thunder said,
someone else is in here.
Happening to me?
Ugh!
What the fuck
is going on here, Johann?
Olivia...
This was your play all along.
Get me out of the picture,
knowing full well
that gash man over here
would spaz out,
leaving you the cock
of the walk.
I...I knew there'd be risks.
There are always risks,
but the odds...
Kill, kill, kill!
I thought you two being upirs,
the genetic material
would be more than a match...
Remember this?
I'm gonna finish the job
this time.
You kill me,
there'll be no-one to keep you
from devouring yourself,
like that rat.
Gagging on your own intestines.
- Chewing on your own shit.
- Ew.
You said something about this
match not being close enough.
Anything that
significantly diverges
from your genomic synthesis
will end up exactly like that.
It's just a matter of time.
You have to admit,
it was a good plan.
When we're on the same side,
we're unstoppable,
so finding a candidate
closer to
my genomic synthesis,
are we talking family members?
Well, I would have to analyse
the nucleotide sequencing.
Get to work,
and don't fuck this up.
What about him?
Waste not, want not.
Well, then.
I'll leave you to it.
Alright, enough.
We need him alive.
Enough.
Ugh!
Destiny was here.
Where is she now?
I never saw her.
Then why did you have her ring?
This has been in our family
for generations.
What would I want
with a stone that small? Hmm?
I couldn't fence it
if I wanted to.
A trophy, like Andreas' watch.
Maybe somebody
doesn't want us truce-ing.
They're framing me.
Pitting us against each other.
And who'd want to do that?
Fucking rivals. The Italians.
- Chinatown boys. The Mexicans.
- Oh, sure.
Yeah, blame it on the Mexicans.
You?
You were over looking at my
stuff when that ring appeared.
- What are you trying to say?
- Fuck this! Fuck!
He could be telling the truth.
I mean, if he's being set up,
she could still be alive.
He was having her followed.
Your grandmother's ring
was in his dressing room.
We got to face the facts here.
Destiny's not coming back.
We don't know that.
I mean, she could have...
She could have... She could...
She could...
Oh.
I'll find out
what he did with her.
No more. No more!
I can't! I can't.
We know what you did. You don't
want to cop to it? That's fine.
I'm finishing it right now.
Let's see what
your errand boy Luka knows.
No-one followed her.
You say you always
keep tabs on your enemies.
Huh?
Either you were lying then,
or you're lying now.
Which one is it?
I read somewhere
that a broken femur
is the most painful injury
the human body can experience.
It was a fucking...
it was a fucking trap.
Yeah?
I didn't do anything
to that chick.
You know how many enemies
I have, hmm?
Destiny, she never even rated.
Fuck!
Where is she?
Jesus. Fuck.
Fuck. OK!
I'll tell you.
She...she came...
..she came looking for revenge
for what we did to her man,
just like you said,
and I put her on a plane
out of the country.
Just like we did with that whore
who was fucking Andreas.
She...she knew that it was
catch a flight or a bullet.
I didn't do anything to her.
I swear.
You're lying.
Uncle Johann.
Shelley, you have become
such a celebrity.
Well, what are you doing here?
I'm afraid
it's not a social call.
It's...about your mother.
Is she OK?
Roman told me she's sick.
She is not at all well.
If you see her coming, I need
you to call me immediately,
and promise to get as far away
as you can, no matter what.
Oh, my God.
Is she gonna be OK?
She's receiving state-of-the-art
medical attention,
which I'm overseeing personally.
Then she's in good hands.
The best.
Can you keep a secret?
I'm leaving Hemlock Grove
tonight.
This time tomorrow, I'll be
up in Maine chasing butterflies.
I don't think it's safe for you
to be travelling all alone.
Can you keep another secret?
Sometimes I fear
that's all I'm good at.
I have a boyfriend.
Now that you're here,
I'll introduce you.
I already know you'll get along.
Aitor gets along with everybody.
You are truly full of surprises.
I am...so happy for you,
Shelley.
Truly happy.
Can I share a secret of my own?
Do tell.
I've been
seeing someone myself.
What's he like?
It feels...
I don't know how to describe it.
Like you can be your ideal self
because that's what he sees
when he looks at you.
What am I going to do
without you?
Write...
..every day.
Well...
Well, where is
your special someone?
I can't wait to meet him.
I almost believed him.
He was a good liar,
but he got what he deserved.
Still, Destiny's dead
because of me.
Edge Cliff Woods.
Told me his guys
were gonna bury us there.
I swear
I didn't make him up.
No, I don't think Aitor Quantic
is something anybody
could make up.
There he is.
- Story time.
- You're gonna love this.
This is a story about a man
and three wishes.
There's no genie,
but there is a bottle,
because our man
was a drinking man.
Yeah.
And one night, he found himself
face to face
with one of his darkest fears.
This particular bottle
that had given him so much joy
and pleasure was empty.
In fact, there wasn't
a drop left in the whole house.
And no money to buy more.
That's when he made
his first wish.
He summoned all the powers
from realms seen and unseen
and wished for another bottle.
Yeah.
- Alright.
- Yeah.
And when he opened his eyes,
he saw all the empty bottles
lying around and realised
his wish had been granted.
He could take 'em to the store,
collect the deposit money,
and buy more booze.
So he jumped in his truck.
He hauled ass out of there,
but he didn't check
the rear-view as he backed up.
So he didn't see what made
the loud and terrible thunk
he heard
when the truck rolled over it.
Made his second wish.
Summoned those powers,
from realms seen and unseen.
"Please, please, please, don't
let it be the neighbour's dog."
And lo and behold,
his wish was granted.
It wasn't the neighbour's dog.
It was an old man,
just walking by.
The cause of death, tyre tracks
on or about the head.
I went to jail
for vehicular homicide.
I did my time,
but when I was released,
I thought I knew more
than the authorities,
so I skipped out on parole.
I was still suffering
from that disease of self
that got me drinking
in the first place.
I've been a fugitive ever since.
Now, this former drinking man,
this me...
..made a third wish.
I wished for something so rare,
so impossible,
the odds of me finding it
were due south of none...
..all the powers from realms
seen and unseen notwithstanding.
I wished for a soul mate.
And a woman so rare,
so beautiful and unique
came unto me...
..causing me to say,
"What's up?"
I, uh...asked her
to come away with me.
To run away
would be more accurate,
'cause I can't stay here.
I'm afraid of being caught
for what I did.
That's my disease of self
rearing its ugly head
because...because what I
was really asking her to do
was hide herself from the world.
She's already
done enough hiding.
It wouldn't be fair.
I wish things
could be different...
..but I'm all out of wishes.
So, with this siren song
as my swan song...
..I bid you all adieu.
We should get out of here.
Don't go! I love you.
Stay where you are!
Please, do not run!
I repeat, do not run!
What? It's late.
- Uh, Roman Godfrey?
- Who is this?
Yeah, hi.
This is Detective Israel.
I'm hoping you can help me
with an ongoing
homicide investigation.
I'm following up on a lead
regarding the murder
of Merrill Samis and his family.
They were found frozen to death
in South Erie last week.
I don't even know who that is.
If this is some kind of a
prank call, I'm not in the mood.
"Helmet smorgasbord."
Does that mean anything to you?
Mr Samis texted that
to your phone the day he died.
Where'd you say
you were calling from?
South Erie.
Blinsky!
I wasn't sleeping.
You weren't answering
your phone, either.
Erie. Erie, Pennsylvania.
That's where we need
to be looking.
Put it in the fucking computer!
Even with a zipcode
this would take a while.
We got him. We fucking got him!
I'm looking for some protection.
Oh, we're fresh out of condoms.
Try holding an aspirin
between your knees.
I live alone, and there
have been some break-ins
in my neighbourhood.
Say no more.
Just so happens we're having
a 'World's Gone to Shit' special
this week.
For the ladies,
the Taurus.45/.41.
Great conceal and carry.
The Smith & Wesson M&P22.
And the Sig Sauer P226.
All available
in breast-cancer pink.
Mm.
I was thinking more along
the lines of a Desert Eagle.
Recoil on a weapon
like that'll land you
on your pretty little bubble
butt back in last Tuesday.
You guys didn't think
my pretty little bubble butt
was so helpless
when we were dropped in the LZ,
to patch up Chosen Company,
2nd Battalion,
after the Battle of Wanat.
"God's own angels,"
I think the GIs called us.
Sorry about the jokes.
It's alright.
Nothing I haven't heard before.
Need some hollow points.
125 grain. Jacketed.
Jesus. What kind of burglars
are we talking about here?
The kind you drop fast,
and they don't get up.
♪ That girl sweet
as the cane in the Malibu rum
♪ With a mouth full of smiles
like 12 million suns
♪ But go messin' with her, son,
she'll put you in check
♪ With your ass in the air
and a boot on your neck
♪ Rebel Breezy ain't scared
She just throwing it down
♪ So you best come correct
or get run out of town
♪ 'Cause she swung like a G
♪ On you and your set
♪ Over, under don't matter
♪ 'Cause you lost the bet
♪ She planks so good
She planks so hard
♪ Gotta plank like her
or we both go cold
♪ We be plankin' too... ♪