Hellcats (2010–2011): Season 1, Episode 16 - Fancy Dan - full transcript

Previously, on "hellcats"...

You sure school
is worth all this?

Dan, I'm going to graduate,

Pass the bar up north,
and work in the da's office.

You're applying
for a scholarship?

I have one now
for cheerleading.

Cheerleading.
Whoa.

Hello, marti.
Welcome to cheertown.

I'm afraid
I let all of you down.

I know now
that an innocent man

Went to jail for my crime,



And that's
why I've come forward

And told the district
attorney that

Travis guthrie must go free
and I must do my time.

We'll be exclusive.

You'd better not be joking.

Dan and I were together.

It was a mistake.
We were both drunk.

Shut up!

Do you know dan patch?

He quit yesterday, cleaned out
his locker, said, "see ya. "

I lost dan once.
I'm not losing him again.

It's complicated, but
I'm in love with a guy

Who moved
without telling me

And I'll probably
never see him again.



Oh, derrick.

Hey, coach.
Hey.

Lookin' pretty good out there.

Thanks.

Hey, can we talk?

Sounds serious.
Eh, it kind of is.

Hey, gretchen?

Yeah?

Give them a hard 5, yeah?

Will do.

Guys, 5 minutes.
Grab water, rest up.

I've been deployed.

You're being deployed?

Yeah.

Yeah, my army reserve unit
got called up.

We ship out in 3 days.

How long you gonna
be gone for?

At least a year.

We start off in germany, and
from there, we could, um...

We could be sent anywhere
they need doctors.

Even on the front lines?

Well, these days, we don't
really have front lines.

Is that supposed to
make me feel better?

Vanessa, it's
in everyone's best interest

To keep the doctors safe.

But, you know, if
something should happen...

Don't talk like that.

I want to make sure
you're taken care of.

I think that we should
step up the timetable.

Let's get married
before I ship out.

Oh.

Um... Wow.

We'll do it legally
now, you know,

With the justice
of the peace and then

We'll have a big
celebration when I get back.

Ok, but I don't care
about the benefits, you know?

It's not just about
the benefits, vanessa.

If I have to go, I want
to know that I'm married

To the woman
that I love.

I just... I just don't
want to have any regrets.

Ok.

Let's do it, then.

How's travis working out?

Best server I got.

Good roommate, too.

Doesn't leave his
hair in the drain

Like other
people I could name.

Do you really want to start
listing annoying habits?

Well, if we did,
I'd win.

You wish.

I appreciate you helping me.

Oh, honey,
it's my pleasure.

The good news is I
have come up with a way

For you to pay me back.

That does sound
like good news.

What is it?

Well, first of all, wipe that
suspicious look off your face.

It's more than
a little insulting.

So insulting you're
dodging the question?

Well, I might
not even ask you now.

Oh, good.

Thanks for lunch.

I need you to sing on
Saturday at an event I planned.

Is this event by any chance
jimmy patch's wedding?

Well, what difference
does it make?

You'd be doing
me a favor.

Look at travis.

How happy is he?

No way. No.
Dan's gonna be there.

He's the best man.

That's right, and he's only
in town for the weekend.

You know
for a fact he's leaving?

Look at you.
You are interested.

And this might be your
only chance to see him.

No. Save the mind games, mom.

I'm not doing it.

You know, dan's daddy
asked for you specially.

It would really break his
heart if you don't do this.

Well, you can ask
him yourself.

What? You didn't.

Marti beth.

Hey, mr. Patch.

A little bird tells me

You're having a bout
of stage fright.

Oh.

Stage fright?

Honey, I had
to tell him that.

I understand.

I get it myself
at school board meetings.

But I'm here to say that you
have nothing to be afraid of.

You are among family.

Hell, I've known you since you
were about that tall.

Mildred loved
your singing voice.

Made her so happy, and you'd
come on over and play piano.

We never could afford
one of our own.

What do you say, marti?
Give it a try?

It would be my pleasure.

'atta girl.

Yeah, you got it.

So, he's leaving right
after the wedding?

That's what his dad
told my mom.

Look, I'm not jumping at
the prospect of awkward

Small talk with a guy
who hates me, ok?

I don't think the problem
is that he hates you.

If you want me to,
I'll back out.

I'm not gonna let anything
mess up our friendship again.

Then be honest with me.

Do you still have
feelings for dan?

Romantic feelings?

No.

I mean, it's confusing.

I didn't before we left,
and then while he was gone,

I really missed him a lot
more than I thought I would.

So I don't know.

Maybe that means
something.

How about you?

In spite of everything
that's happened... Yeah.

I just wish I could tell him.

Well, you should, then.
Right?

I think the only way
for us to settle this

Once and for all is if
we both go to the wedding.

Wait. Settle this?
What are we settling?

Level playing field.
All above board.

We both go
to the wedding,

Put our best feet forward,
and see what happens with dan.

You know, for a second there,

I thought you were
actually suggesting

Some kind of competition
for dan, which,

Of course, you can't be,
because that would be crazy.

It's not a competition.

It's... An emotional
exploratory.

What?

Yeah. We both show up,
he sees us,

He talks to us, and what's
meant to be is meant to be.

I just don't have an invitation
to the wedding, though.

Do you think your mom could
hire me as a cater-waiter?

This is not
a cheer competition, savannah.

I have to see him.

Please.

Ok.

Fine.

Thank you.

But it's not a competition, ok?

Of course not.

Hey, audrey?

Hey, this
is savannah monroe.

Do you think that she could
get me in for highlights today?

Mmm.
Hey!

Hey, now. Knock yourself
out, man. I'm done.

Thanks. I need
to get my strength up.

Rough practice?

I went and saw jake today.

Ooh.
Talk about depressing.

Jail makes the dorm rooms
look like peabody hotel.

I thought you hated jake.

I feel bad for the guy.

Coach has us taking
turns. I went last week.

I mean, jake and I, we've
obviously had our issues,

But circumstances change.
Relationships change.

I mean, take us for instance.

Who would've thought we'd
have ever ended up friends?

We only became friends after
you were properly punished

For circulating my private
photos all around campus.

Hmm. I bet jake wishes he had
those photos right now.

He says hello, by the way...

And he misses you.

And he wonders why you
haven't come to visit him.

We're through.

I... I don't want to give
him any false hope.

Hey, I'm just
relaying the message.

Well, I should get to practice.

Work off your fries.

See ya.

He said you
promised to visit him.

Is that true?

Sort of.

Yeah.

Look, jake messed up,
all right?

But in the end, he did
the right thing.

I practically had to swindle
him to get him there.

I am now shedding any
tears over jake harrow,

And I'm certainly
not going to visit him.

Ok, is there something
else going on here?

This conversation's over.

So, I thought we'd put the
wedding party table here

With the little arrangements,
facing the stage and the dance floor.

W- where's
the baby's breath?

I don't see
baby's breath.

Oh, the baby's breath's
right over here.

Here it is.

It's... White.

I- it's white!

Yes. Baby's
breath is white.

It is?
I didn't know that. I...

What are we gonna do?

It's all over my wedding
ceremony looking... White.

Just try and relax.

She's a little stressed out
with all her relatives in town.

My mother hates
white flowers.

I mean, my father sent her
white roses the entire time

He was having an affair
with his business partner.

This is a nightmare.

I will call
the florist.

Thank you.
Mm-hmm.

Thank you so much.
Mm-hmm.

Whew. I appreciate
your patience.

So how's everything coming
with the entertainment?

Good. We have locked
down faber drive,

And marti has agreed to
sing some rolling stones.

Awesome.

Theresa and I met
at a stones concert.

They're our band.

Oh.

Hey, I hate to listen
in without permission,

But did you say marti's
singing at the wedding?

Uh-huh.
Oh, my god!

What's wrong with marti?

Did something happen
to her voice?

No.
No.

Everything's fine.
Nothing's wrong.

Marti's great. Yeah.

Ok, we're gonna get
some fresh air.

Yep.

Jimmy always had a soft spot
for high-maintenance girls.

Oh!

What's in this?

Oh, star fruit.

A little bit of vodka.

Yeah?

So, um... How long has it been
since you've seen marti?

Did you know that she got that
man, travis, out of prison?

Mm-hmm. And she's doing
something different with her hair.

Mm-mm. Wanda,
don't do this.

Oh... What
are you talking about?

Do what?

I let you mess
with my head once.

I ended up in
a world of confusion

I've just recently found
my way out of, so no.

My relationship with marti
is off-limits to you.

Ugh, fine.

Is she ok?

She's good.

But she misses you.

How about savannah?

Savannah?

Yeah, yeah.

I hurt savannah real bad.

Oh, well. She seems
fine to me.

All right.

Well, I'm gonna go make sure
everything's ok with theresa.

I'll see you later
at the wedding.

Savannah...

Thanks.

You ok?

I'm getting married.

I know that.

Tomorrow.

Tomorrow?

Oh.

So we're just gonna bite
the bullet and just do it.

Hmm.

I guess that doesn't
leave much time

To throw your bachelorette party, huh?

I guess not.

I know what you're thinking.

Do you?

Yeah, I'm not doing this out
of guilt or obligation.

I am marrying derrick because
we are good together.

I've got a lot of time
in this relationship

And I'm not throwing
it all away

Just because we
have to rush it a bit.

I noticed you didn't
list "I love him"

As one of your reasons.

Because that goes
without saying.

I love him.

We've worked very hard
on this relationship,

And I'm not throwing it
all away on a whim.

What whim?

You.

You're the whim.

Bad whim.

All right, let me
ask you this...

What if the roles
were reversed?

Would you want derrick
to marry you

If he felt about
another woman the way

That I think that
you feel about me?

Don't flatter
yourself.

And I'm leaving.

You don't think he
can sense it, though?

I mean, that
you're wavering.

Of course wants to put a ring
on your finger before he goes.

He's scared.
Scared of what?

He's scared that you're not
gonna be here when he gets back.

Ok, I think I'll get
my relationship advice

From someone else,
because you, my friend,

Are not to be trusted
with this particular subject.

Well, I suppose not.

But even a stop clock
is right twice a day.

Good-bye, red.

Hey, are you guys
registered anywhere?

Bye!

Ok, y'all, listen up...

The photos from this event
are going on my website,

So if we all like the idea

Of continued gainful
employment,

No screwing up, no spilling
and, above all, no snacking.

And yes, maurice,
that does mean you.

All right, go. Everyone.
Let's go.

Go on, now. Go.

He looks good,
doesn't he?

Yeah, everyone
looks good in a tux.

Even penguins.

It's a joke.

Got it. Thanks.

What's in the bag?

A change of clothes...

To even
the playing field.

Well, I'm performing.
I have to dress.

Mm-hmm.

I'm not competing.

That's what my sister
always says to save face

When she knows
I'm gonna beat her.

Here you go.
Pumpkin pie, extra whip.

Thanks.

You're alice, right?

You're the one that talked
the quarterback into confessing?

Yeah.

Well, that must've been
one hell of a talk.

Sort of.

Yeah.

Yeah. Well, I just...
I want to thank you.

I mean, what you did, it means
the world to me, so...

The pie's on me.

Thank you.

I wish I could do more for you,

But I'm sort of broke
at the moment, you know.

Um... But if ever need
anything... anything at all,

I mean, just come
and talk to me. All right?

All right.

You... You want
to sit for a second?

Yeah, sure.

Something on your mind?

I've been getting a lot of
pressure to go visit jake.

How come?

We used to date, and
he's been asking for me.

Oh.

He committed a crime
and let you,

An innocent guy,
go to jail for it.

The way I see it, he
doesn't deserve any visitors.

You want me to
be honest with you?

Of course I do.

Uh... I guess I've never really
thought about it, but...

I kind of want
to see the kid suffer.

But to say he doesn't deserve
visitors, I don't know.

I mean, it's a bad place.

The guy needs support,
no matter what he's done.

I'm sure as hell not gonna
go visit him, but, you know,

I like the idea that
somebody, somewhere is.

Wow.

That's not what you wanted
to hear me say, is it?

I... you know what?

I just... I owe you so much,
and I just...

I don't feel comfortable
lying to you about it.

I value honesty.

Well, glad to hear that.

Who knows?

Maybe someday
I'll change my mind.

I'll go pay him
a visit myself.

I think you would scare
the crap out of him.

I know.

Enjoy your pie.

Thanks.

You know how to sell
a song, marti perkins.

Hey, you know,
wedding audiences are easy.

Lots of booze and optimism.

So, your mom's
done a spectacular job.

I think she's even
charmed my daddy.

Oh, watch out.

You might end up
with a new stepmother.

Which, I guess, would make
you and me brother and sister.

Not since luke and leia, huh?

Ok.

Yo, m. Wait up.

We need to talk.

I owe you an apology.

No, you don't.

Yeah, I do.

I left you with a big
mess in your lap,

And then I wouldn't take
your calls and I...

Wait, stop.
You don't owe me an apology.

I was horrible about how
I handled everything.

I've thought a lot about me
and you... I've been thinking.

Sorry. You first.

Ladies first.

Ok, well, um...

It's been really weird around
here without you...

And I've been thinking...
mushroom puff?

Savannah.

You look good.

Thank you.

I hope I didn't
interrupt anything.

No. No, no. Not at all.

I'm glad
to see you.

Dan! There you are.

Hey, you.

Um, marti, savannah?

This is vicky.

Hi.

She came up to memphis
with me from new orleans.

We met on a boat doing
oil spill reclamation.

I'm passionate
about shorebirds.

I've cleaned oil off
of 276 of them so far.

Are those
mushroom puffs?

Awesome.

The chicks live in the
marsh where the oil is

And then the oil
gets on their little,

Downy bellies, and then
they clean their feathers,

And, well, you see that
276 times it's devastating.

Devastating.

I admire your
dedication.

I can't imagine how those
birds get along without you.

You should go back.

Uh, I think I need
to sit down.

Yeah.

Excuse us.

"It's devastating.
Devastating. "

I don't get it.
What does dan see in her?

Her flawless,
protruding breasts?

I don't know.

I want to punch him.

Hey, I appreciate
the save.

What save?

If you hadn't come up
when you did,

I would've made a complete
fool of myself with dan.

You were going to tell him
how you really feel?

That you wanted to be
more than friends?

I... I don't know.

You don't know?

I have no idea what was
going to come out of my mouth.

I do miss dan.
And then there's

This stupid competition we're not having.

Whatever I said would've
been a complete disaster

And I'm lucky
you stopped me.

That was really honest.

Thank you.

Dan and I work
as friends.

That's what I want.

That's all I want.

And I'm sorry he's
with someone else.

I wish he were with you,
making you happy.

Don't count me out yet.

Come on, he's
with someone.

For now.

Now if you'll excuse me,
I have to pass out the nibbles.

See that girl over there?

In the blue dress?

You want to make a quick $40?
No, make that $50.

You sure?

Just get her talking
about shorebirds. Ok?

Ok.

What are
you wearing?

I spilled on my uniform.

Yeah. Lucky for me I had
this dress in my car.

Just think of me
as a stealth waiter.

Come back here.

Sorry, wanda.

Those guests are
looking really thirsty.

Wanda? We need
to fix the cake.

My mother's new boyfriend
is allergic to dairy.

It's butter cream icing.

You know, let's
get you a drink.

Have you ever had a mood
stabilizer martini?

No.

They're great.
Come on.

Give me something
with everything.

We moved the bird
to a second, clean pan.

Now, there we have
this special spa-nozzle

That propels the water
at sufficient pressure.

Uh... Cheers.

Hey, dan.

Mr. Patch, it's good
to see you again.

The pleasure's mine.
And call me james.

Yes.

Savannah, these
are my cousins...

Michael, chris,
and frank.

And michael's wife, casey,

Chris's girlfriend, jill,

And frank's wife, kimmie.

Incidentally,
congratulations, kimmie.

It's impossible to tell you
had a baby 6 months ago.

Thank you.

Oh, you're good.

Yeah, dan would pull out
a photo album

From time to time and I have
a good memory for faces.

Whoosh!

Dry.

It's very impressive.

Now, we don't
normally condone

The use of leg bands,
but in some...

Ok. This isn't worth it.

She can keep her
50 bucks.

I never expected michael
to ever get married.

Uh, dan.
Could we go outside?

I just need to talk to you.

Dan?
Who is this person?

Oh, you met her
a little while ago.

No, I mean, who is she?
To you?

She just paid some guy $50

To ask me questions about
the shorebird rescue project.

Do you deny it?

I think it's time
to cut the cake...

Except for those who are
lactose intolerant.

Yes, dear.

Savannah, we are
running low on plates.

Be a darling
and go grab some.

All right, come on.
Let's go. Come on.

I would like to know what
the hell's going on here.

All right.
Let's go cut the cake.

Come on, everybody.

I'm assuming you
didn't invite savannah?

No. No, I have no idea
why she's here.

No idea? Really?

I thought you were the
smart one in the family.

Figure she wants to talk to me,
make me explain myself.

It's a conversation
I am not anxious to have.

Hurt her pretty
bad, huh?

So you brought
the bird woman

Of lake pontchartrain
along as what?

A human shield?

I though having a date along
would keep my head straight,

Keep me from
doing something stupid.

Any of this got something
to do with marti?

How?

She didn't want
to show up today.

Wanda came
to me with some

Cock and bull story
about stage fright.

Stage fright?

Marti? Come on.

I played along.

Yeah, things got a little weird
between us before I left.

Broke up with savannah
because of it.

Marti.

My, my...

What?

I love that girl
as a daughter,

But she is
a bad fit for you.

Why?

She's a train wreck.

You're a train wreck.

Thank you, dad.

I say that with love.

2 train wrecks are exciting
to watch, but people get hurt.

You need a girl
like your mom.

Somebody to call you
on your crap.

You know how I knew
your mother was the one?

She made me try harder.

She made me want to
be a better person

And believe
that I could be.

When you were seeing savannah,
I saw a little of that.

Saw you behaving
like a grown-up.

It's a good color
on you, my son.

If you're trying
to make me feel worse

About screwing up
with her, it's working.

Good. Then my fatherly
work here is done.

Oh, and are you aware that
vicky cleaned up 276 shorebirds?

Yeah, that may have
come up once or twice.

You're still not dressed?

Neither one of these
feels quite right.

Honey, you're gonna look
gorgeous in either one.

Mmm.

Ok, so I printed out
the online form

For our
marriage license.

Now, I filled
in most of it,

But I wasn't exactly
sure what to put here.

Do you plan on changing
your name?

Oh, I hadn't
thought about it.

Well, I'm ok with
whatever you want to do.

I'll keep it, then.

Honey, what's wrong?

I'm nervous.

It's perfectly natural.

All right, listen.

All you have to do
is sign on the dotted line

And I promise you I will
fill out all the rest.

I'm sorry, derrick.

It's ok. It's ok.

Just take a breath
and, you know,

I'm sure all brides get
nervous on the day.

I just thought that I'd have
more time to be sure.

About what?

About us.

Ohh.

Ok.

Ok.

I see.

Is it red raymond?

I'm sorry.

Oh, wow.

Yeah, he warned me.

Look, it's my fault.

Blame me.
It's my fault.

No. No, I'm not
gonna blame you,

And I'm not gonna blow up at you

And storm of here
like some child.

That's not how
I want this to end.

All I ever wanted
was to make you happy.

That's it. And I'm so sorry
that I couldn't do that.

But I still love you, 'nessa.

And I always will.

All right.

Just tell red that
I said congratulations...

And I wish you two
the very best.

It was awful.

I don't know what
I would've done

If your mom
hadn't stepped in.

Is there something
wrong with me, marti?

The fact that I'd want dan
back after what he...

You guys did?

You're a wonderful
person with love

And forgiveness
in your heart.

There is nothing wrong
with you.

You know,
we got through the night

Without hurting
our friendship.

I wasn't totally
certain we would.

Yeah.
I'm proud of that.

Proud of us.

Me, too.

Look, I know everything
has changed between us...

But I just can't stand by and
watch my former best friend

And my new best friend
make a terrible mistake.

Is that what you were
gonna say to me earlier?

Yeah.

Because what I wanted
to say to you was that...

You were right before...
About us being friends.

It's what we're best at.

What we were meant to be.

You really mean that?

Yeah.

Yeah, I do.

I've really missed you.

I missed the heck out of you.

Now get your ass
over to savannah.

Man.

What am I supposed to say?

Dan...

If you have to ask...
You don't deserve her.

Hey.

It's good to see you.

Jake, I'm so sorry.

Oh, no. That's ok.

I mean, I know you're busy.

No, I mean
I'm sorry you're here.

Oh.

Yeah, me, too.

All that stuff
I said was lies,

Everything I said to you
at the football stadium

About believing in god

And god having
some bigger plan.

I don't understand.

I just said it all
so you would confess.

I just wanted to
save the hellcats.

You're saying it's
your fault that I'm here?

Yeah.

Allison, I'm here because
I robbed the pharmacy

And let an innocent man
take the blame.

But you didn't have
to confess.

I wasn't getting away with it.

All you did was make that
when I ended up behind bars

I felt like
a decent person.

You see marti, tell
her she was right.

I am sleeping better.

I... I don't know
what to say.

That's a first.

Oh, you know, I may
have played this wrong.

Maybe I should have let you
think this was your fault.

Why?

I could guilt you into coming
back to visit again.

Well, guilt has never been
a great motivator for me.

Was this time.

Maybe I could come
back anyway.

You know, I could make
it worth your while.

I hear a lot
of great jokes in here.

Really?

No.

Hi.

Hey.

Sorry about all the
drama with vicky.

It was stupid to
crash your party.

The only reason I'm
still here is because

Marti made me promise
to give her a ride home.

You know, I think
she may have done that

To give you and me
a chance to talk.

It's a good theory.

She's sneaky.

In a good way, I mean.

I wasn't referencing...

That's ok.

Oh, man.

You know, I have been
trying to figure out

What I could say to make up
for what I did, how I left.

I couldn't be more sorry
for hurting you, savannah.

But sorry just... it doesn't
seem to be near enough.

Sorry is a good
place to start.

That's where
marti and started.

Mm-hmm.

Man, I thought a lot about
you while I was gone,

About how you used to surprise
me, challenge me all the time.

About how just the thought
of getting to be near you

Used to make me look forward
to getting up every day.

I can't tell you
how much I missed you.

Then why
didn't you call me?

And why did you hook
up with vicky?

Because I knew I'd have
to be honest with you

About what happened with marti,

And I didn't think
you could forgive me

For that, or that I had
the right to ask you to.

Ask me.

Can you forgive me, savannah?

Yes.

Ok, uh... There's one thing
I have to do first.

What?

I gotta break up with vicky.

I mean, it's only been
a couple weeks, but...

It's good. Go.

Yeah?
Yeah.