Heartbeat (1988–1989): Season 1, Episode 6 - The Wedding - full transcript

# Heartbeat

# Why do you miss
When my baby kisses me?

# Heartbeat

# Why does a love kiss
Stay in my memory? #

Very neat job.
No marks on the window.

Looks like the same bloke.
Only took silver.

Blaketon won't like it.
He had hoped chummy had moved off.

Still alive and nicking!
Oh, dear.

And still leaving
his little trademark.

Apparently, these magazines were all
over the place before he broke in.

Tidied up?
It tallies with the other thefts.



At Strensford,
some plates were put away.

At Elsinby, he did the washing-up.

A house-proud silver thief.
Extraordinary (!)

THEY CHUCKLE

Well? Are you waiting for him
to come in and dust the cells?

Go out there and catch him!

What's up?

Do I join Ferrenby
or take the job in Middlesbrough?

The hospital need to know.

Alex can't be that bad to work with.

It's the way he works.

His age.

All that brown paint in his surgery.

Look, he wants you, your methods.
A new approach.



People here get sick
the same as in London.

Maybe you're the person they need
to drag this place into the 1960s.

I can't offer you the white heat
of modern technology

but you wouldn't have come back here

if that was what you wanted,
would you? Hm?

What are you doing now?
Right now? Nothing.

Excellent! Come with me on my round.
Meet some more patients.

Get a feeling for the challenge!

Well, that is
if you feel you'd like to?

Yes. Sure.

Good. Good!

Again?
Afraid so, Mr Townsend.

Why can't this bloke burgle
when I'm not so busy?

Silver, you say?
Yeah. Here's a list.

Well, here we are. Abraham Salter's.

It's a bit muddy out there.
If you'd rather stay in the car...

I expect you get all sorts
of stuff pass through here.

Yeah, Victoriana to vegetables,
deco to doilies.

That's King George V, innit it?

Who are the other blokes?

First World War leaders,
Marshal Foch, President Wilson.

Is that Kitchener?

No, that's Earl Haig.

Kitchener's missing,
I'm afraid. Pity.

Sorry. No villain
selling through us this week.

It doesn't seem
to have responded, Mr Salter.

I think it's the damp what does it.

These can't do much good either.

What do you think, Kate?

A touch of pneumonia.

It's only mild, Mr Salter.

Nothing modern medicine
can't put right.

But I think we'd better beef up
his antibiotics just the same.

What about trying oxytetracycline?

He may have built up
a resistance to penicillin.

Quite!
WOMAN: It's only me!

Ah! Is she taking
good care of you, Mr Salter?

Oh, yes. Miss Stirling brings me
a hot meal every day.

Good. Now, you keep eating well,

and together we'll have you
up and doing in no time.

Hello, Doctor.

Nurse.

This is Dr Rowan, Miss Stirling.

Good morning.

We'll be off, then.

Kate, my dear,
you may be a bit rusty,

but watch the bedside manner.

It's not good for patient confidence

to have two doctors
indecisive over treatment.

I just don't think
we could work together.

I know you're not keen on
that hospital job.

That's not true.
I want you to be happy, that's all.

That's what I want as well.

Good God...
What?

They're getting married.
Not hanging about either!

Who?
Alan Maskell and Sandra.

'Ey, you don't think
she's up the duff, do you?

Don't be daft! She's on the pill.

Oh, yeah. Still, that would be
one thing about the hospital job.

What ?

They don't shut on Saturdays.
You might have to work on the 23rd.

Get up. The phone, it's for you.

But it's three o'clock
in the morning!

It's Dr Ferrenby.

You'd better not keep him waiting.
It sounds urgent.

Oh, Kate, my dear!

Sorry to drag you out,
but I thought you'd appreciate

seeing the practice
at its most unattractive.

Absolutely.
Penelope Stirling rang.

One of her old people
is sinking fast.

Miss Stirling? At this time?
She keeps odd hours.

Well, don't we all?

I'll be jolly glad
when my new assistant arrives,

whoever she, or he, may be.

She had some lovely things.

I suppose so. Yes.

Oh, what a pity!

One of these ink bottles is missing,
isn't it?

I've no idea.

Looks quite precious.

I don't know about that.
It'll all be auctioned off.

Didn't she have any relatives?
No, another lonely old soul.

There's the death certificate.
Will you see to the undertaker?

Leave it to me, Doctor.
Thank you. Good night.

I'm sorry about yesterday, Doctor.

I think we got off
on the wrong foot.

We all make mistakes.

You get off home.

It can't do you much good,
making house calls at 4am.

Oh, I'm often out at this time.

Good night.

Good night.

Apart from the missing candlesticks,
did you notice anything else?

In what way?

I know it might sound silly,

but was anything put away,
or tidied up?

Well, yeah.
Someone's finished our jigsaw.

Ten shillings to Mr Dow.

Lot 25. It's South African
campaign medals circa 1902-1903.

With a presentation box
that would have contained tobacco.

Anyone start me with two pounds?
Do I hear two pounds?

Two pounds. Thank you.

£2.10? £3?

£3? £3. Any more?

Morning, Walter.

I hear your nipper's getting wed.

Aye. Proper job an' all.

The lass has no dad,
so it's down to me, worse luck!

Course of true love
never did run cheap, you know!

I might be able to get you
a nice morning suit half price.

Get away!
There's nowt wrong wi' my old suit.

How about flowers?

Oh, aye? Need more than a bunch
of daffs out of the woods.

Transport.
I bet you've not fixed up a car.

Aye. Mind, it must be cheap.
What can you do for a fiver?

I could get you summat really smart.
All above board, mind.

Walter! How long have you known me?
Course it'll be above board.

Miss Stirling!
OK, but you ask her.

We're getting married on the 23rd.
Are you free to play the organ?

I think so. Come to the church
tomorrow and we'll talk about music.

Come on, you two!
You'll miss the kitchen stuff.

Lot 35.

One incomplete set of Toby jugs
depicting World War I figures.

Made by Wilkinson's,
designed by Carruthers.

Ten of the eleven.
Unfortunately, no Lord Kitchener.

Certainly collectable.
Who'll start at 100 guineas?

80 guineas. 85. 90.

95 guineas.

95 guineas against you. All done?

At 95 guineas.
Sold to Miss Stirling!

You've done this before,
Miss Stirling.

What? Oh, it's you, Constable.

You seem very knowledgeable.

I wouldn't know where to start.
It's simple, really.

Know what you want
and what you are prepared to pay.

It helps if you know
a bit about antiques.

Well, you obviously do.

I like to surround myself
with old things.

I worked for a dealer in Lincoln.

I thought you'd always
lived round here.

A rolling stone, Constable.
Do you miss the antiques business?

I wasn't very good at it.
Fell in love with the stock.

Couldn't bear it when
anything got sold. Excuse me.

85, 90, 95,

400.

Thank you.

Not at all, madam. Thank YOU.
Call in again sometime.

So, what new leads have we got?

Nothing.

Well, nothing new.

No-one ever hears him.

And he always tidies up.

It's like he's mocking us
for not catching him.

Bellamy, that's his fatal flaw.
That's his Achilles heel!

And that's why we'll catch him!

And when we do,
you should take a lesson, Ventress.

Oh! Yes, Sarge.
"Yes, Sarge."

So, as we haven't got any leads,
what about some crime prevention?

Go round the likely houses.
Warn the occupiers.

TOGETHER: Yes, Sarge.
Right! Move!

Sergeant, Penelope Stirling.

What about her? You don't think
she's the burglar, do you?

No, Sergeant.
I think she's up to something.

What?

Well, I'm not sure what.
With her good works?

Rowan, that lady is a saint.

He'd like to get his hands
on this.

CHURCH ORGAN PLAYS

You said to come and see you.

Of course! You just made me jump.

You have something, Lord Ashfordly,
that this burglar wants.

Well, it can't be money!

No. This burglar
specialises in silver.

Are your cabinets alarmed?

Good God, I couldn't afford that.

I'm still trying to bring
the plumbing into the 20th Century.

But you do have an alarm
linked to our police station.

Yes, the insurance company's idea.
And what's wired to it?

Not much, I'm afraid.

This picture, the Vermeer,
and the tapestry upstairs.

The alarm rings straight through?
Yes. Makes no sound here at all.

Perhaps you should put
some of this in the bank.

We don't think the villain is local
so he will probably move on soon.

Unless we catch him first.

Funny old things, aren't they?
Quite ugly, odd. Strange.

Yes. Picked them up this morning,
in Strensford.

All World War I leaders.

I saw some just like these.
Lord Kitchener was missing.

It can't be these.
That's Kitchener just there.

It's a bit muddy, Alex.

If you'd rather stay
in the car...

Yes, I would, actually.
You can't.

Yes, I can. I can do what I like.

Go on. Off you go!

MUSIC PLAYS ON TURNTABLE

Tough at the top, in't it, Doctor?

A woman? Oh, yeah. Definitely.
Late 50s, sensible clothes.

Do you know her name?
No idea.

Has she sold stuff here before?
No, I've never seen her before.

Did she know
the value of what she had?

Yeah, she wanted £400,
not a penny less.

And she insisted on cash.
Very specific about that.

Was the set complete?

Of course. I wouldn't have paid
half as much if it wasn't.

I'm very pleased, Mr Salter.
You're coming along nicely.

It's your pretty face, Doctor.

You tell old Ferrenby
I only want to see you from now on.

Well, we'll have to see.

I'd better be off. Bye-bye.
Bye.

BANGING UPSTAIRS

He wants me to read to him.
We've started Great Expectations.

He used to be an English teacher.

Loved to read, but his eyes
aren't up to it anymore.

Some of those look quite special.
Oh, I wouldn't know.

One book looks much
like another to me.

You do all this voluntarily?

My reward is seeing them happy.

Lord Kitchener was missing
when I sold them.

The Toby jugs came like that
from Major Fitch.

Who?

Major Fitch. Or rather, his estate.
He died a couple of months ago.

Is there a widow?
No relatives at all.

Miss Stirling looked after him,
took him his meals.

Miss Stirling?
Is she a regular customer of yours?

Fairly regular, yeah.
What does she buy?

Usually she only buys when
we sell her old people's things.

I suppose she buys things
to remember them by.

Does she ever sell things here?

Not to my knowledge.

Major Fitch?

Yeah. Did he report anything stolen
when he was alive?

Well, he wouldn't have
reported it dead.

In any case, he was dead before

the silver burglar
came to our patch.

It's not silver I'm interested in,
it's Lord Kitchener.

No. Nothing here.

Oh, great! Thanks, Alf.

Decisions, eh?

The unsociable hours of the houseman
versus the unsociable hours of a GP.

Well, just don't ever become
part of the brain drain.

This country needs good doctors.

What did you want
when you first came here?

The question hardly applies.

It was so different then,
mainly private patients.

A doctor had... position.

Now, I'm part of the landscape,

being slowly eroded
by time and social change.

And things are changing, Kate.
Even if not as fast as you'd like.

Do you regret the change?
Regret?

No, I belong to a time that's past,
when age meant respect.

Now, it's a time for the young,
and I'm not young any longer.

A doctor today needs
your kind of drive, Kate.

Good night, Alex.
Good night, my dear.

That's the church, the organist,
the flowers and a cake.

What about a car?
I know a bloke in Ashfordly.

It's all right. I've sorted it.
Oh? Great!

I don't believe it,
she's a good woman.

A bit brusque,
but a heart of gold.

I think Penelope's halo has slipped.
I'll get proof tomorrow. How?

Townsend's selling
Elsie Baker's effects.

I bet she'll be there.

She's not interested in antiques.
Who told you that?

She did. When Elsie Baker died,
and again at Mr Salter's.

Well, there you are.

She told me she worked
for an antique dealer in Lincoln.

All right, OK.
Where does she get her money from?

She's hardly
the private income sort.

But when they auctioned
off the Major's effects,

she splashes out 95 guineas on
an incomplete set of ten Toby jugs.

Later that day,
someone answering her description

sells a complete set
of 11 Toby jugs for £400!

Maybe she found the other one
in an antique shop.

Maybe those ten made up a set.
Maybe she got lucky.

Well, maybe her luck just ran out.
Do you want another one?

All right.

Hello, Alan.

I need your advice.

You had speeches at your wedding.
Yeah.

If my dad toasts us,

I toast the bridesmaids,
who does the best man toast?

I'm not sure he toasts anyone.
What does the best man think?

He's in London. I haven't asked him.
A Londoner?

He's from around here,
moved to London last year.

He's a great laugh.

Do you want a drink?
Yeah, why not?

Excuse us a minute, love.

You organised the transport?

I've got you a cracking motor.
She'll look like Princess Margaret.

Good!

That reminds me.
Have you got a photographer?

Dress looks fab.

I've got an old bracelet,
new shoes, blue earrings.

I'm just short
on something borrowed.

What about a garter?
Have you got one?

I bought one for our wedding
but I don't wear it down the pub!

Thanks.
Everything else all right?

It's fine. Except I'm not keen on
Alan's best man. Chap called Derek.

Why?
He's got a big mouth.

I'm a bit worried about what kind
of speech he's gonna make.

All right. Thanks for checking.

I will, yeah. Bye.

PC Hardwick at Lincoln
sends his regards, Alf.

What do you want with Lincoln?

ALARM BELL

Come on, you two! Don't hang about.
What is it, Sarge?

Ashfordly Hall!
Bellamy, mind the shop!

Aye.
You can trust me, Sarge.

I'm terribly sorry.
New maid, more through than usual.

Dusted behind the picture.
One touch and the alarm goes off.

Well, no harm done, sir.

I'm awfully sorry. I'll keep it
switched off in the daytime.

Sir, would you leave
the picture at this angle?

What on earth for?

Well, if the silver burglar,
who tidies up, comes here...

we'll give him something to tidy.
Good idea, Rowan.

Lot 1 is
a late Georgian silver inkstand.

Fitted central taper and snuffer,

with unfortunately only one
cut-glass silver-capped ink bottle.

Who'll start me at five guineas?
Five, anyway.

Thank you, Miss Stirling.

I've decided I'm not going
to take the job with Ferrenby.

It's not for me,
I'm a hospital doctor.

So... Middlesbrough.

I know I've let you down.
No, you haven't.

Whatever you think is right for you.

I don't want to become old,
reliable Dr Rowan,

ranked one above the nit nurse!

I don't want to be
part of the scenery.

The scenery's not
that bleak round here.

OK. Join the hospital.

Go back to never knowing
your patients.

Go back to the 30-hour days,
petty politics and bureaucracy.

I was there last time, Kate.

I knew it! I knew you didn't
want me to take that job.

No. But don't look on your hospital
work with rose-tinted glasses.

You're knocking Ferrenby's practice,
I thought I'd even things up.

Well, that's very kind of you.

Kate, whatever happens,

you'll never be just part
of the scenery.

Your last chance to back out.

We'd be in London
before the pubs shut.

Derek!

You wanna move to London.
There's a whole scene there.

I've got the garage,
and Sandra won't move.

Well, if things don't work out...

Shut it, Derek.
It's my wedding day!

DEREK CHUCKLES

What do I have to do again?

Take that gum out, for a start.

Not there!

This car's seen better days
as it is.

You stand on my left, then we walk
down the aisle till we get to Alan.

Then we stop.
You take a step back to the left.

Stand there, and don't say anything!

I told you to get a haircut.
Mum!

What will Alan's parents think?

Walter...
I don't like ties.

How much did you drink last night?

She looks like
butter wouldn't melt in her mouth.

So where's your proof?

I was sure they would have had
something on her at Lincoln.

# MUSIC: 'The Wedding March'

Are you in charge of this vehicle?

What? Oh, yes.
It's polished up quite nice.

Make sure you return it
to its rightful owner

before I'm back on duty. All right?

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Thanks for letting me borrow this.

Not at all.

I hope you're both
very happy together.

Remember?

Who let Greengrass supply your car?
Alan's dad. Is something wrong?

Nick was just admiring it.

I'll see you later.
Enjoy yourselves.

This is your day off.

Yeah, me and Ringo, we're like that.

I went to school with Paul.
Great mates.

Don't believe a word he says.
He's all mouth, he is!

Just cos you've got
no gear groups in Yorkshire!

Scousers! Full of wind!
You what?!

Be'ave, you!

Walter, Mr Greengrass wants paying.

Are you Vince?
No, I'm a friend of Alan's.

You're a Londoner?
I live there now. Great place!

It's dead up here.
All right if you like morgues.

I'm Derek, by the way.
Nick.

Fancy livening yourself up a bit?
Sorry?

You know, lemonade for the brain.
Oh, right.

Have that on the house.

If you want more,
you know where to find me.

I hate moments like this.

Why can't I go out and forget
what I do for a living?

What's happened?

The best man
just gave me some drugs.

At a wedding?

What is it?

I think it's duraphet.
An amphetamine, like speed.

Black bombers?

Miss Stirling!

You did well with your Toby jugs.

I was talking to a friend,
apparently they're quite valuable.

I'm not really in touch...
I'd love to have a look at them.

Oh, I'm sorry! I've just
spotted an old friend. Excuse me.

Some day off (!)

I'd better be going.
Oh, already? You played lovely.

Thank you. It was a nice spread.

Make sure the car
is returned to Mr Salter.

I'd hate him to think it was stolen.

What was that about?
Claude!

GIGGLING

I told they were good.
Yeah! That's getting to me. Yeah!

You feeling good?
Yeah! They're demon, aren't they?

You got any more?
How many do you want?

No, no. Outside.

CHEERING

So how many do you want?
How about I take the lot?

It'll cost you.
No...

It'll cost YOU.
I'm a copper. You're nicked.

Right! I'll count to three.

One!

What did you say to me,
you Liverpool...? Walter!

Two!

Three!

I thought this was your day off.

What was the first thing
you said to me when I arrived here?

Go on. Remind me.

If you're here, you're on duty.

ALARM BELL
Ventress!

Ashfordly Hall!

It'd better not be someone
doing late-night dusting. Let's go!

Police! Stay where you are!

Right. If you'll just
sign the statement.

There is something else
you can help us with.

We found this among your things.

No-one's reported it stolen.
Where did you get it?

I'm sure he nicked this
from Miss Stirling's house

before she bought the rest
of the inkstand.

Hang on, Rowan. How did she get it?

When she looks after
the old people,

she sniffs round and sorts out
the most valuable objects.

And always sets of things?

Exactly. She borrows one of the set.

The victims are too old
to notice one thing missing.

Then when they die,
if there's an auction,...

..she'll move in and legitimately
buy the rest at a lower price

because the set's incomplete.

Then later, she sells
the complete set and cashes in.

I say.

So shall I get her in?

What for?
Well, theft!

You've only the word of a burglar.

All your witnesses are dead!

I feel ever so much better.
Thank you, both of you.

Nothing to do with me.
I'm told I'm not pretty enough.

Is that right?

I've missed all these.

If ever I'm confined to bed again

build me some shelves
in the bedroom, would you?

So I can die in peace.

Here, that's funny!
What is?

This set of Charles Dickens.

Oliver Twist's missing.

That's a very serious allegation,
Sergeant.

Yes, I have Mr Salter's
copy of Oliver Twist,

but I can assure you
I did ask to borrow it.

He said you didn't.
I'm sorry, but I did.

He must have forgotten.
Well, you know how old people are.

Do you still have that inkstand
you bought, Miss Stirling?

Yes, of course. Why?

Remind me. It was incomplete.
One of the ink bottles was missing?

Yes.
Well, Miss Stirling...

..we believe
this was stolen from you.

Oh, thank goodness you found it!
So you were burgled?

Yes.
Why didn't you report it?

Well, I was going to,
but this was the only thing taken.

And you've recovered it so quickly.

There!

You're very smart, Miss Stirling.

But I must warn you.

We know what you're doing
and we know how you do it.

And you must remember,

a lady with your reputation,
any hint of a scandal...

So, the ink bottle.

It's ours.

Evidence.

Yes, of course, Sergeant.

Rowan.

Well?

I'll go and tell him.

Well, go on then.

Aren't you going to come with me?

No, I'll wait here.

Well, go on.

I'm really looking forward to it,
Alex.

Oh, my dear, so am I.

Oh, wait a minute!

I've got a present for you.

When did you get that made?
A couple of weeks ago.

I knew you'd say yes in the end.

'Ere, hold on.
They've spelt your name wrong.

What?!

Excuse me.

It's all right.
She's your new doctor.