Have Gun - Will Travel (1957–1963): Season 1, Episode 22 - The Singer - full transcript

HOSPITALITY TOWARD
STRANGERS IS A WESTERN VIRTUE.

IF YOU GENTLEMEN DON'T
SEE FIT TO PRACTICE IT,

YOU WILL FORCE
ME TO USE THIS GUN.

HEY, YOU.

MY NAME "HEY,
BOY," NOT "HEY, YOU."

DOES A MAN NAMED
PALADIN LIVE IN THIS HOTEL?

YEAH, MR. PALADIN
IS UP IN SUITE 205.

YOU WANNA SEND MESSAGE?

I'LL DELIVER IT PERSONALLY.

OH, MR. PALADIN VERY BUSY.

HE CAN'T BE
BOTHERED WITH VISITOR.



I'M NO VISITOR.
THIS IS IMPORTANT.

BUT MR. PALADIN GIVE STRONG
ORDER NOT TO DISTURB HIM.

YOU WAIT HERE.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

YES? WHAT IS IT?

[SPEAKS CHINESE]

GO AHEAD, CHUNG.

WAIT, WAIT.

[SPEAKS CHINESE]

YOUR NAME PALADIN?

MR. PALADIN, I TOLD
HIM NOT TO BOTHER YOU,

BUT HIM NO UNDERSTAND ENGLISH.

WHAT DO YOU WANT?

IS THAT YOUR CARD?



IF YOU WANT TO TALK BUSINESS,
COME BACK IN THE MORNING.

I'M BUSY THIS EVENING.

I'VE GOT $1000 FOR THE
MAN WHO CAN HELP ME.

BUT YOU PROMISED.

AS I TOLD YOU, I'M
BUSY THIS EVENING.

PLEASE CLOSE THE
DOOR ON YOUR WAY OUT.

LOOK! I RODE 50 MILES TO TALK TO YOU AND
YOU'RE GONNA LISTEN OR I'LL BUST YOUR JAW!

HEY BOY, PLEASE TAKE
CARE OF THE YOUNG MAN.

TOSS HIM IN THE ALLEY?

NO, HE MIGHT DIE OF PNEUMONIA.

PUT HIM IN A ROOM AND
HAVE THE MANAGER BILL ME.

THANK YOU, HEY BOY.

NOW MY DEAR, YOU WANTED
TO SEE THE BARBARY COAST.

OH, BUT I'D SO MUCH RATHER...

[GIGGLES]

SORRY ABOUT LAST NIGHT.

I LOST MY HEAD.

WHAT'S YOUR PROPOSITION?

IT'S A WOMAN, MR. PALADIN.

I GOT WOMAN TROUBLE.

$1000 WORTH?

WE WERE GONNA BE MARRIED.

I WAS RAMROD AND CHIEF CATTLE
BUYER FOR PETE HOLLISTER.

HE SENT ME OFF TO TEXAS
TO BUY SOME CATTLE.

WHEN I GOT BACK TO THE
RANCH, SHE WAS MRS. HOLLISTER.

WHAT DID SHE DO BEFORE THAT?

WHEN YOU WERE THE
INTENDED BRIDEGROOM.

SINGER IN THE OROFINO IN FRESNO.

SINGS LIKE A BIRD. YOU
OUGHT TO HEAR HER.

SHE WAS TOO GOOD FOR THAT.

SHE'S TOO GOOD
FOR HOLLISTER, TOO.

HE FORCED HER INTO MARRYING HIM.

MR. BLAKELY, I'VE FOUND THAT
FORCING A WOMAN TO DO ANYTHING

IS VERY DIFFICULT. YEAH?

HE DID IT JUST THE SAME.

PAID ME A YEAR'S WAGES. HAD
ME THROWN OFF THE RANCH.

DID THE LADY EVER EXPLAIN
HER CHANGE OF AFFECTION?

NAH. NEVER EVEN GOT A
CHANCE TO TALK TO HER.

WHEN I DID TRY TO GET
BACK ON THE RANCH,

A COUPLE OF HIS HANDS
JUMPED ME AND BEAT ME UP.

I REALLY NEED
YOUR HELP, PALADIN.

I'M NOT FOR HIRE
AS A HOME BREAKER.

ALL I WANT TO DO
IS TALK TO FAYE.

TO FIND OUT WHETHER
SHE'S HOLLISTER'S PRISONER,

OR HIS WIFE.

HOW MUCH TIME DO
YOU FIGURE YOU NEED?

TEN MINUTES.

THEN I'LL KNOW WHETHER
SHE STILL LOVES ME OR NOT.

TEN MINUTES. $1000.

WILL YOU TAKE THE JOB?

IF YOU UNDERSTAND THAT I'M NOT BEING
HIRED TO BREAK UP ANOTHER MAN'S MARRIAGE,

I'LL GET YOU THE TEN MINUTES.

WHEN DO WE START?

JUST AS SOON AS WE
FINISH THIS COFFEE.

THAT'S A NICE
LITTLE PLACE. YEAH.

HOW DO YOU FIGURE
WE SHOULD GO IN?

LET'S TRY THE FRONT DOOR.

UH-OH. HERE COMES TROUBLE.

WHO ARE THEY?

THOSE ARE THE ONES
WHO JUMPED ME LAST TIME.

SO ROD BOY. IT'S
BEEN A LONG TIME.

WE KIND OF FIGURED YOU'D
LEARNED YOUR LESSON LAST TIME.

NOW GET MOVIN'.

WHAT'S THE MATTER,
GENTLEMEN? IS THERE A LAW

AGAINST PAYING A SOCIAL
CALL ON MR. HOLLISTER?

THERE'S A LAW AGAINST
HIM BEING ON THIS RANCH.

THE HOLLISTER LAW,
AND THAT'S ENOUGH.

NOT THIS TIME. I'M GOING IN.

YOU'RE GOING OUT IN A BOX.

HOSPITALITY TOWARD
STRANGERS IS A WESTERN VIRTUE.

I HOPE YOU GENTLEMEN WILL SEE
FIT TO PRACTICE IT FROM NOW ON.

NOW GET ON THE HORSE.

ALL RIGHT, LET'S
SEE MR. HOLLISTER.

[PALADIN:] NOW JUST STAND THERE.

I'LL GO IN THE FRONT DOOR,
YOU'D BETTER GO IN THE BACK.

WHAT FOR?

WHILE I'M TALKING
TO MR. HOLLISTER,

PERHAPS YOU CAN
TALK TO HIS WIFE.

WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?

WHO'S HE?

MY NAME IS PALADIN.

FAST GUN, BOSS.

HE COME HERE WITH ROD BLAKELY.

YOU TWO BETTER
GO GET CLEANED UP.

SO BLAKELY'S GONNA
HAVE ME MURDERED, EH?

NOBODY'S GONNA BE
MURDERED, MR. HOLLISTER.

YOU AND I ARE JUST
GONNA SIT DOWN

AND HAVE A NICE,
QUIET LITTLE TALK.

FOR EXACTLY TEN MINUTES.

WHY TEN MINUTES?

'CAUSE THAT'S HOW LONG BLAKELY
WANTS TO TALK TO YOUR WIFE.

WHERE IS HE?

PROBABLY WITH MRS. HOLLISTER.

NOW WOULDN'T YOU LIKE TO SIT DOWN
AND MAKE YOURSELF COMFORTABLE?

SHE'S GONE. WHAT
DID YOU DO WITH HER?

SHE HEARD YOU WERE COMING,
SO SHE ASKED ME TO HIDE HER OUT.

THAT'S A LIE.

YOU KNEW IF I CAME
BACK, SHE'D GO WITH ME.

GO AWAY WITH YOU?

WHY DO YOU THINK I HAD
YOU KICKED OFF THIS RANCH?

SHE DIDN'T WANT
YOU HANGING AROUND.

NOW WHY DON'T YOU GROW UP?

[COCKS GUN]

IF YOU DIDN'T HAVE THAT GUN, I'D
BEAT THE BRAINS OUT OF BOTH OF YOU.

I'M NOT INTERESTED
IN DISPROVING THAT.

I'M LOOKING FOR MRS. HOLLISTER.

GO AHEAD AND FIND HER.

BUT REMEMBER, SHE'S MY WIFE.

I'LL REMEMBER.

I'M GONNA SEE PEG NO
MATTER WHAT YOU DO, PETE.

I'M GONNA SEE HER.

NOW REMEMBER THIS.

IF EITHER OF YOU SET
FOOT ON THIS RANCH AGAIN,

I'LL PERSONALLY SEE THAT
YOU'RE KILLED. NOW GIT.

[PIANO IN DISTANCE]

[WOMAN SINGING]

I HEAR IT.

YEAH. YEAH, THAT'S
FAYE ALL RIGHT.

HE'S GOT HER LOCKED UP.

I PROMISED YOU TEN MINUTES
AND YOU'LL GET IT. COME ON!

[CONTINUES SINGING]

OOH!

[SINGING CONTINUES]

ROD! FAYE!

ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

YOU DON'T KNOW HOW
GLAD I AM TO SEE YOU, ROD.

YOU'RE ENTITLED TO
YOUR TEN MINUTES ALONE.

MRS. HOLLISTER,
VERY NICE TO SEE YOU.

I TRIED TO RUN AWAY
TO SAN FRANCISCO,

BUT... PETE CAUGHT ME.

SINCE THEN HE'S
KEPT ME LOCKED UP.

PUT ME OUT HERE
LIKE... LIKE AN ANIMAL.

FAYE, I LOVE YOU AND I'M
GOING TO GET YOU OUT OF HERE.

WILL YOU TAKE ME
TO SAN FRANCISCO?

THAT'S WHAT I WANT
MORE THAN ANYTHING.

I'LL TAKE YOU ANYWHERE
YOU WANT TO GO...

IF YOU'LL MARRY ME.

SORRY TO INTERRUPT.
THERE'S ACTIVITY AT THE HOUSE.

THEY SEEMED TO HAVE
NOTICED THEIR GUARD IS MISSING.

COME WITH ME, DARLING.

[HOLLISTER:] BLAKELY?! I
KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE!

COME ON OUT!

ALL RIGHT, ROD. I'LL LEAVE HIM IF
YOU CAN GET ME OFF THIS RANCH.

YOU COMING OUT, BLAKELY,
OR DO WE COME IN AND GET YOU?

MRS. HOLLISTER, YOU
STAY HERE AND KEEP DOWN.

WE'RE NOT LEAVING FAYE.

ROD, LEAVE HER HERE.
SHE'S ANOTHER MAN'S WIFE.

SORRY, CAN'T DO IT.

THAT'S YOUR CHOICE, NOT MINE.

I GUESS WE HAVE TO
SHOOT OUR WAY OUT, EH?

WE HAVEN'T GOT A CHANCE.

YOU KNOW A BETTER WAY?

MAYBE.

BLAKELY!

ALL RIGHT.

ALL RIGHT.

I'M GONNA GIVE YOU JUST TWO MINUTES
TO COME OUT OF THERE AND SURRENDER!

TWO MINUTES! DO YOU HEAR?

YOU GOT TEN MORE
SECONDS, BLAKELY!

FIVE!

THREE!

TWO!

[HORSE NEIGHS]

YAH!

DON'T SHOOT!

YOU'LL HIT MY WIFE!

GET TO YOUR HORSES!

WHOA!

GET THAT GATE OPEN!

THEY WENT THIS WAY!

PALADIN!

HEY BOY.

YOU KNOW THAT UNCONSCIOUS
MAN FROM THE OTHER DAY?

HE CAME BACK TO SEE YOU.

GOOD. I WAS EXPECTING
HIM. WHERE IS HE?

I LET HIM WAIT IN YOUR ROOM.

IS IT ALL RIGHT?

THAT'S FINE. THANK YOU.

MR. PALADIN! HE...

YOU WEREN'T SATISFIED TO
GET OUT OF THERE IN ONE PIECE,

YOU HAD TO BRING
HER HERE WITH YOU.

PALADIN, I WISH YOU'D
STOP HAMMERING AT ME.

I TOLD YOU, WE'RE
TWO PEOPLE IN LOVE

AND WE'RE GONNA GET MARRIED
AND THAT'S ALL THERE IS TO IT.

HOW DO YOU EXPECT TO SUPPORT
HER WHILE SHE'S WAITING FOR A DIVORCE?

HER TASTES AREN'T
EXACTLY INEXPENSIVE.

HEY BOY SAYS SHE'S IN THE
MOST OPULENT SUITE IN THIS HOTEL.

WE'LL WORK IT OUT. WE
TALKED IT OVER LAST NIGHT.

THE MOST IMPORTANT THING...

IS TO JOIN THAT OPERA COMPANY.

DO YOU THINK LAUNCHING AN
OPERA CAREER IS INEXPENSIVE?

THAT'S NO LONGER
ANY CONCERN OF YOURS.

YOU'VE DONE THE JOB
YOU WERE HIRED FOR,

NOW HERE'S YOUR $1000.

AND WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO
WITH HOLLISTER WHEN HE GETS HERE,

WHICH SHOULD BE SOON.

[KNOCK AT DOOR]

COME IN.

GOOD MORNING.

GOOD MORNING, DARLING.

CAREFUL, DEAR. I'VE
JUST HAD MY HAIR DONE.

AND HOW ARE YOU THIS
MORNING, MR. PALADIN?

THAT'S A VERY ATTRACTIVE DRESS.

DO YOU LIKE IT?

I FOUND IT DOWNSTAIRS IN
THAT QUAINT LITTLE SHOP.

LUCKILY IT JUST
FIT ME PERFECTLY.

OH, I CHARGED IT
TO MY BILL HERE.

IS THAT ALL RIGHT, DEAR?

OH, SURE. YOU HAVE
TO HAVE CLOTHES.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO SIT
DOWN, MRS. HOLLISTER?

THANK YOU.

YOU HAD BREAKFAST?
MAY I CALL DOWNSTAIRS...

NO, I NEVER EAT A
THING BEFORE NOON.

JUST SOME LEMON JUICE.
MY VOICE, YOU KNOW.

WELL, MY VOICE TEACHER
ARRANGED AN AUDITION

WITH ME FOR THE OPERA COMPANY.

I'M CERTAIN I COULD
BE SOME HELP.

I HAVE A VERY GOOD FRIEND,
SIGNORE VITTORIO BARTELLINI.

FORMERLY OF LA SCALA
AND NOW THE FOREMOST

OPERA IMPRESARIO
IN THE UNITED STATES.

I'M CERTAIN I COULD
ARRANGE A PRIVATE AUDITION.

OH, MR. PALADIN.

WOULD THREE O'CLOCK
BE CONVENIENT?

OH, BUT I DON'T HAVE MY MUSIC.

I'LL NEED AN ACCOMPANIST.

I'D BE HONORED TO ACCOMPANY YOU.

YOU? WELL, ALL RIGHT.

DO YOU KNOW "LA SONNAMBULA?"

"LA SONNAMBULA?"

YOU'RE NOT GOING TO
SING THAT, ARE YOU?

WHY NOT?

BECAUSE IT'S A PIECE OF
STICKY, SENTIMENTAL DRIVEL.

THE SLEEPWALKER.

BUT I'VE STUDIED IT SO HARD!

MRS. HOLLISTER, YOU'RE
NOT A SLEEPWALKER.

YOU'RE A WARM, VIBRANT,
FULL-BODIED WOMAN.

AND BESIDES THAT, THE PIECE
IS BEST SUNG BY A COLORATURA,

AND YOU'RE NOT A
COLORATURA, ARE YOU?

NO, I'M A LYRIC.

I KNOW A WOMAN LIKE YOU
WOULD HAVE A FULL-BODIED VOICE.

LET'S SEE...

"THE MARRIAGE OF FIGARO." THERE'S
AN OPERA THAT WAS WRITTEN FOR YOU.

WHEN I HEARD "LA
NOCE DE FIGARO,"

THE MEANING OF LOVE CRIED
OUT FOR A WOMAN LIKE YOU.

OH, MR. PALADIN.

I KNOW A LITTLE THEATER
JUST DOWN THE STREET.

IT'S DARK IN THE AFTERNOONS,

AND I KNOW I CAN GET THE
USE OF IT FOR TWO HOURS.

THE USE OF A PIANO...

AND IN THE MEANTIME, I SUGGEST
THAT YOU GET SOME REST.

ARRIVEDERCI.

MR. BLAKELY...

ISN'T IT WONDERFUL, ROD?

JUST WHAT YOU WANTED, FAYE.

TO THINK MR. PALADIN
KNOWS BARTELLINI.

WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME
ABOUT MR. PALADIN BEFORE?

HEY BOY.

OH, MR. PALADIN.

HEY BOY, IN THE NEXT
COUPLE OF HOURS

THERE'LL BE A GENTLEMAN
LOOKING FOR ME

OR FOR MR. BLAKELY. HE'S
TALL AND HAS GREY HAIR.

OH, I CATCHIE.

MR. PALADIN OUT OF
TOWN ON BUSINESS.

NO, YOU DON'T CATCH.

MR. PALADIN WILL BE AT THE
OLD THEATER DOWN THE BLOCK

AT THREE O'CLOCK THIS AFTERNOON.

THREE O'CLOCK IN THEATER?

RIGHT, HEY BOY. IT'S A
COMMAND PERFORMANCE.

COMMAND PERFORMANCE?

♪♪

[SINGS]

I WARNED YOU, BLAKELY.

WAIT, PETE. NOT NOW.

THIS IS HER BIG
CHANCE. LET HER FINISH...

AND WE'LL SETTLE
EVERYTHING ONCE AND FOR ALL.

FOR HER SAKE, PETE.

[SINGS]

WELL, SIGNORE BARTELLINI?

[WHISPERING]

NOW MAYBE YOU'LL COME HOME
AND START ACTING LIKE A WIFE.

OH, NO I'M NOT, PETE.

I'M GOING ON WITH MY CAREER

AND THERE'S NOTHING
YOU CAN DO TO STOP ME.

SIGNORE BARTELLINI SAYS THAT'S
THERE'S A REMOTE POSSIBILITY

THAT PERHAPS IN FIVE OR SIX
YEARS, WITH INTENSIVE TRAINING...

I'VE BEEN STUDYING FOR QUITE
SOME TIME NOW, MR. PALADIN.

MRS. HOLLISTER,
TO BE A FINE SINGER,

REQUIRES SACRIFICE, A GOOD
DEAL OF OLD-FASHIONED SWEAT.

AND NOT A LITTLE BIT OF
HUMILITY AND UNDERSTANDING.

AND MONEY.

WHERE ARE YOU
GOING TO GET MONEY?

I'LL GET ALONG. ROD'LL HELP ME.

WON'T YOU, ROD?

SURE, I WILL.

MAYBE IN A COUPLE OF YEARS
AFTER WE'VE BOUGHT A RANCH

AND GOTTEN IT ROLLING.

A RANCH? A COUPLE OF YEARS?

THAT'S THE IMPORTANT
THING, ISN'T IT?

GETTING MARRIED, HAVING
A HOME OF OUR OWN.

SURE, I WANT YOU TO SING, BUT...

LATER, WHEN I CAN AFFORD IT.

I SEE.

I SHOULD'VE KNOWN YOU WERE
NOTHING BUT A CHEAP TIN HORN.

NOW JUST A MOMENT!

I'M GLAD I FOUND OUT NOW.

BECAUSE YOU MAKE ME SICK.

BLEATING ABOUT TRUE LOVE.

BRAVO! FINE PERFORMANCE.

AND WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

IT MEANS YOU'VE SHOWN YOURSELF
TO BE A SPOILED, SELFISH WOMAN.

MR. PALADIN, YOU'RE TALKING
TO MY WIFE. REMEMBER THAT.

I REMEMBER. I WOULDN'T
HAVE IT ANY OTHER WAY.

THAT IS A MARRIAGE
MADE IN HEAVEN.

YOU TWO REALLY
DESERVE EACH OTHER.

MR. PALADIN, I'VE TAKEN ABOUT
ALL I'M GOING TO TAKE FROM YOU.

NOW YOU'RE GOING TO TAKE IT FROM
ME NOW THAT YOU DON'T HAVE YOUR GUN!

PETE! PETE, ARE YOU HURT?

NO MORE THAN I WAS
WHEN YOU LEFT ME.

IS THIS THE WAY YOU'RE
GOING TO BE, FAYE?

GOING THROUGH LIFE
ALWAYS TAKING AND TAKING...

AND NEVER GIVIN' UNLESS
YOU GET BACK TWICE OVER?

I'M AMBITIOUS, PETE.

IF I GOT ANY KIND OF CHANCE,
I'D BE AWFUL GRATEFUL TO YOU.

I GUESS THE OLDER YOU GET,
THE MORE FOOLISH YOU BECOME.

I'LL GIVE YOU THE
CHANCE. YOU KNOW THAT.

BUT DON'T BE GRATEFUL.

I KNOW WHAT I'M BARGAINING FOR.

MR. PALADIN, THIS IS THE
BEST MONEY I EVER SPENT.

THAT'S FINE, VITTORIO.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

HERE'S FOR THE HAIRCUT,

AND THIS IS FOR YOUR EXCELLENT
PERFORMANCE YESTERDAY.

GRAZIE, SIGNORE.

IT WAS A PLEASURE TO OBLIGE YOU.

IF YOU WEREN'T SUCH
AN EXCELLENT BARBER,

I'D RECOMMEND THAT
YOU GO ON THE STAGE.

YOU'RE A VERY CONVINCING
ACTOR, SIGNORE BARTELLINI.

I'LL TELL YOU A SECRET.

I WAS NOT ACTING.