Hart to Hart (1979–1984): Season 3, Episode 13 - Hart of Diamonds - full transcript

NARRATOR: This is
my boss, Jonathan Hart,

a self-made millionaire.

He's quite a guy.

This is Mrs. H. She's gorgeous.

She's one lady who knows
how to take care of herself.

By the way, my name is Max.

I take care of both of them,

which ain't easy,

'cause when they
met, it was murder.

[♪♪]

[♪♪]



Oh, that's beautiful.

MAN: It is nice,
isn't it, Mrs. Hart?

Uh, that's from the
Vandergrif collection.

Oh. We have
several other pieces,

including one magnificent piece

that I've been
saving just for you.

Oh. Would you like to see it?

I'd love to.

Heh. Excuse me.

I'll be right back.

[SIGHS]

[GASPS]

MAN: But surely, Mrs. Hart...

Of course not, Mr. Pond.



Mrs. Hart may have been
late for an appointment.

Or perhaps she simply walked out

without realizing she
had the bracelet on.

Although I must admit,

it is a delicate situation.

But what are we
going to do, Mr. LaJoie?

Send the bill to Mr. Hart.

By messenger.

[♪♪]

Good afternoon, Mrs. Hart.

Good afternoon. How are you?

Excellent, thank you.

I know it's bad for business...

but when I look at you,

I wonder why you come here.

It is called
preservation, darling.

All our customers don't
have to be after-the-fact.

[LAUGHS]

When you get to be my age,

you'll be so glad

you've had the benefit
of my treatments.

Good afternoon, Lily.

Tell me...

you have been taking
the vitamins as instructed.

Every morning.

Good. Very important.

Yeah, the, uh, tonal root
cleanser and astringent?

Every evening. LILY: Wonderful.

The avocado-and-egg beauty mask?

Religiously.

Oh... oh, except this morning.

Um...

Jonathan had it for
breakfast. Heh-heh.

Oh. [SNICKERS]

Well... at least
he has good taste.

Oh, he didn't seem to think so.

Shall I take Mrs.
Hart, Miss Von Borg?

No, you knew very
well that I always

take care of Mrs.
Hart personally.

Shall we, dear?

Mm.

[SIGHS]

Now, let's see, you've
completed five treatments.

Only seven to go.

Excellent.

Why don't you get
undressed, relax,

and I'll be back in a moment.

All right, Lily.

Oh. And don't forget
to put your bag away.

I won't.

[♪♪]

Oh, sh...

You know, a younger man
would've gotten that shot, Miles.

Sure, a younger man
with a 12-foot reach.

Come on, let's get a drink.

All right. Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah.

Loser pays the tab, as always.

Well, now that's a
tradition I won't argue with.

Thanks very much, Miles.

Thank you, sir.

Cheers. Cheers.

You were just too good
for me today, Jonathan.

I got lucky, that's all. I
hit a couple of good shots.

You know, you've improved
a lot since our college days.

Oh, thanks a lot, Miles.

Wasn't it amazing that
we ran into each other

at that ABCO Investors meeting?

Mm. Hm.

Did you get in on that deal?

I sure did. Now, how'd you do?

Well, frankly, I...

I took a beating on that one.

But, uh... all in all,

the market's been
treating me well.

Now... Now, look... Look,
uh, enough shoptalk, okay.

How's lovely Jennifer?

[LAUGHS]

She's just that. I'm
a lucky man. Uh-huh.

You sure are.

Well, I guess I'll be
seeing both of you tonight...

at the going-away party for
Michelle and Gerry Cooper.

Uh, at Laura
Bevins' house, right?

Oh, they're a terrific
couple, aren't they, huh?

Uh, excuse me, sir.

Um, may I have a
word with you, please?

Everybody wants a
hot tip. [CHUCKLES]

I'll be right back. Hold on.

Hi, sport, how you doing?

Good to see you.

[INAUDIBLE SPEECH]

[PEOPLE CHATTERING]

[♪♪]

Anything wrong?

Oh, no, no, nothing.

Uh, just, uh... a mild mix-up.

I straightened it all out.

Well, uh, what do
you say, next week?

Same time, same place.

I gotta get even.

[LAUGHS]

You got it. Okay.

I'll see you tonight, Miles.

WOMAN: Quiet, everybody, quiet.

Grab a glass of something.

We're toasting the
captain and his mate.

Oh.

To Michelle and Gerry.

Bon voyage. Have
a wonderful cruise.

Don't buy too much,
don't eat too much...

and don't forget the Dramamine.

Cheers.

Go, go. Do it.

[ALL LAUGHING]

Music.

Music.

[SOFT JAZZ MUSIC PLAYS]

Jennifer. How about a dance

while the music is still slow?

Ah. Uh, that is,

if you don't mind, Jonathan.

Well, uh... No, I don't mind,

but, uh... watch his backhand.

I'll do that.

You look smashing
tonight, Jennifer.

Oh, well, thank you, Miles.

You look pretty natty yourself.

I suppose you've
heard that Jonathan

nailed me to the
wall today? [LAUGHS]

Yes, well, he did
mention it in passing.

You know, he's getting
better all the time.

How true.

Not beating your
time, is he, Jonathan?

Well, I have to let him take
advantage of me sometimes.

Come on.

Let's give 'em something
to be jealous about.

[MUSIC STOPS]

[APPLAUSE]

Well... Better luck next time.

Come here.

You know, Jonathan,
I just realized

how much you remind
me of my second husband.

Oh. How's that?

Tall, dark, handsome,
and very successful.

Well, thank you.

Uh, will you excuse
me for a moment?

I'll... I'll be right back.

Well, nothing I've said, I hope.

[♪♪]

[LAUGHING]

Well, I thought the whole
party was wonderful.

The champagne was
certainly wonderful.

Oh, yeah, the
champagne was wonderful.

And the cake.

Oh, the cake. Scrumptious.

And the champagne.

Yeah, you said about
the champagne before.

I did? Mm-hm.

Oh. Well...

Well, I thought the whole
party was wonderful.

[GIGGLING]

You know, there's a lot of men

that could take advantage

of a lady in your condition.

[GIGGLING] Oh.

Well, it's a good
thing I'm not a lady.

[LAUGHS]

Oh... I love you.

Mm.

[BARKS]

Not now, Freeway.
Go on. [WHIMPERS]

Go on. Go on.

[GROANS, LAUGHS]

JENNIFER: Aw.

Freeway.

[WHISTLES] Come here, boy.

Come here. Come on. Come here.

Oh, Jonathan.

You didn't.

Aw.

Tsk.

No, I didn't.

[♪♪]

The night that we
had our first date?

No, darling.

Oh, the... the... the...
The night we met?

No.

Uh, then it was...
Had to be, uh...

Oh. Oh. The time you
asked me to marry you.

The time I said yes.

Oh, no. That was the same time.

Darling... Ah, wait a
minute. Wait a minute.

It's not our
anniversary, I know that.

It's got to be... [GASPS]

Oh, I've got it.

What? Oh.

[LAUGHING]

What? Jonathan, that's so cute.

Our first kiss.

Oh, of course.

You were so shy.

Yeah, because your father
was standing behind the door.

Ha-ha. That's it, isn't it?

Now, look. Let me
tell you something.

What? We can go like this

all night long, okay? Uh-huh.

But... I did not buy
that necklace for you...

Yes, you did. No, I didn't.

And it's the anniversary
of a special date,

but you're not telling
me because you want...

You bought the necklace.

[LAUGHING] No. Yes, you did.

And I have the bill from
the jewelry store to prove it.

I don't care about the bill.

The only thing I care about...

is that I love you very much.

And you are the most wonderful
person in the whole world.

Uh-huh.

And so are you.

Thank you.

And you're also the
most unpredictable.

Aha. Thank you.

But I wouldn't have you
any other way, honey.

Mm.

[♪♪]

Good morning, darling.

Good morning.

Oh, I must have overslept.

I'm late for my
appointment with Lily.

Lily? Uh-huh.

Again?

Haven't you been
seeing a lot of her lately?

Well, it's a very
intensive program at first.

You see, she gives you
a series of treatments

that you can do at home...

Uh, vitamin therapy.

And then she teaches you
how to use all her own products.

What's the payoff?

The payoff is...

that you keep the girlish
complexion you were born with.

I like your face
just the way it is.

Well, thank you very much.

That is precisely why I
intend to keep it that way

as long as possible.

You see, this is an
entirely new discipline.

And I don't want to be late.

Hey, wait a minute. I want
to talk to you about last night.

Last night was wonderful.

Talk to you about it over lunch?

See you later.

[♪♪]

Try to relax, Jennifer.

Let the tension flow
right out of your body.

Now... open your eyes, Jennifer.

Focus on the light.

It is so tranquil, so serene.

You feel so peaceful
as you go deeper

into your dream state.

Deeper and deeper.

You hear nothing but
the sound of my voice.

Yes, Lily.

When we are together,

the power of my suggestions

becomes stronger and stronger.

Yes.

When you are in
your dream state,

you follow my instructions.

Now, you did very well with

the bracelet and the necklace.

When you wake...

you will remember nothing
about them, Jennifer.

Do you understand?

I understand, Lily.

Good.

Tonight, when it is safe...

you will again enter
your dream state.

I have another favor
I'd like you to do for me.

JENNIFER: Anybody home?

Oh, yeah. Hi, darling.

Where are you?

Oh.

How was Lily's?

Oh, it was fine.

Only thing is
I'm a little sleepy.

Must have been last night.

Yeah, I have to talk
to you about last night.

What about it?

Well, uh, the necklace.

Did you put it back

in our safety deposit
box or something?

What necklace?

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

I'll get it.

Hello?

Hello, Laura.

Oh, yes. We had a
wonderful time. Thank you.

Really?

How awful.

Yes, I certainly will.

Well, you let us know
what happens, won't you?

All right. Bye-bye.

Well, Laura had a robbery.

Someone stole her
diamond-and-emerald necklace.

Emerald-and-diamond necklace?

[♪♪]

Oh.

Weren't you talking to
me about a necklace?

Darling, are you all right?

Why is everyone suddenly
talking about necklaces?

Maybe I'll just
go upstairs and...

lie down a little
bit before lunch.

That's a good idea.

I hope I'm not coming
down with something.

No, it's... probably
like you said,

you're just tired.

I'll take a little nap.

[DOOR OPENS]

[DOOR CLOSES]

[PHONE LINE RINGS]

Monsieur LaJoie?

This is Jonathan Hart.

Yes, Monsieur Hart. How are you?

Oh, fine, fine, thank
you very much.

I was just a little
curious about that bill

that you sent to me yesterday.

Uh, I hope there
is nothing wrong.

No, no. There's nothing wrong.

It's just that I need a
description of the necklace

for my insurance company.

You mean the bracelet.

Yes, uh, the bracelet.

Forgive me, Monsieur Hart.

I will send it over immediately.

It's just that the
circumstances of the purchase

were a bit unusual.

What do you mean by unusual?

JENNIFER: Hi.

Hi.

Feeling any better?

Oh, I'm fine.

I... I... I just couldn't sleep.

I never can in the day.

Well, I just got off the phone
with, uh, Monsieur LaJoie.

Really? Mm-hm.

What did he have to say?

Oh, nothing. I just called him
about some Vanderbilt pieces

that he had a...
a collection of.

Oh. How nice.

Darling...

you're not having any
dizzy spells or headaches,

or anything like that, are you?

No. Why?

No blackouts?

Nothing like that?

Jonathan.

You're treating
me like a patient.

I feel fine.

You're sure?

I just want you to
keep feeling fine.

Oh.

[♪♪]

So far...

our experiment is proving
to be quite lucrative.

The drug I'm
giving Jennifer Hart

is working beyond
my expectations.

Uh, you mean the vitamins
you're giving Jennifer Hart?

Mm, what else?

You know something.

You're an amazing woman, Lily.

You're an amazing man.

And, you know...

with your social contacts...

there is no end to what
we can do together, Miles.

I mean, together.

[♪♪]

[DRAWER CLOSES]

[CAR STARTING]

Jennifer.

[GASPS]

[GASPS, GRUNTS]

Hey!

[ENGINE STARTS]

[TIRES SCREECH]

[TIRES SCREECH]

[SIREN BLARING]

[♪♪]

Was I... able to drive home?

Well, um...

we drove home in my car,

and I managed to
lose the patrolman.

Then Mr. H phoned
me, and I got a cab,

and went back and
grabbed your car fast.

Otherwise, you'd be begging
some judge for adjoining cells.

I can't believe it.

I stole jewelry from
Michelle and Laura.

Not Michelle.

But I tried.

What difference does it make?

My two good friends.

Jonathan... what's
happening to me?

That's what we're
gonna find out, darling.

Do you remember Bob Chase?

Mm, no.

Bob Chase was a psychologist

that I hired to test
the effects of stress

on Hart Industry executives.

Don't you remember?

I'm going around
the bend, aren't I?

I could wind up
in an institution.

I could lose everything.

Not everything.

You've got me.

[♪♪]

MAN: All right, Jennifer...

I want you to open your eyes.

[SIGHS]

Did it work?

It's not bad. It's
the first session.

But if I'm gonna help...

we have to go deeper.

[SIGHS]

Send in Mr. Hart.

How'd it go? [SIGHS]

We didn't get too far today.

You feeling all right?

Just a little
opening-night jitters.

Sit down.

You... you're an excellent
subject, you know.

Oh. Ha.

Thank you.

You've been hypnotized
before, haven't you?

Uh... Oh, yes.

Mm, but it was a
long, long time ago.

Oh... oh, that
wouldn't account for it.

Account for what?

She was resistant at first,
but once she went under,

she responded as if
she'd been conditioned.

[KNOCK ON DOOR] Come.

It's your neurology tests.

Mm-hm.

Good.

It's just as I thought.

There's no sign of any
abnormality in your brain scan.

Well, I've always said

the lady has had a good
head on her shoulders.

Oh.

You mean, I'm not
a kleptomaniac?

No. Kleptomania doesn't
arrive full-blown like that.

You would have
had earlier symptoms.

Well... I'll see you
both tomorrow.

Mm. Now, in the meantime,

I want... I... I want
you to just go on

with your normal activities.

Thank you. Thanks
very much, Bob.

Jonathan.

You read the report I
did on your executives.

Yes, I did. I found
it very interesting.

Oh, you'd better give
a copy to Jennifer.

Stress kills, you know.

[♪♪]

See you tomorrow.

Do you want to pick
me up later, darling?

There's no sense in
you waiting around.

Oh. I don't mind
if you don't mind.

Okay.

Oh, look, there's Miles.

JONATHAN: Oh,
what's he doing here?

JENNIFER: Oh, he's
probably just visiting Lily.

They're great friends.

As a matter of fact, he
recommended Lily to me.

Really?

Mm-hm.

He raves about her
whenever he gets the chance.

You scheduled for
a body wrap today.

That takes several hours.

You see, we don't really
have facilities for guests.

But if you insist.

I insist.

I see.

Well, make yourself comfortable.

Jennifer, shall we start?

Sorry. Ladies only.

May I help you with something?

Sir?

LILY: Let's get you
all nice and relaxed.

Why don't you
concentrate on the lights?

It's so peaceful.

[EXHALES]

Take one deep, cleansing breath.

[INHALES AND EXHALES DEEPLY]

That's right.

Now close your eyes, Jennifer.

Shut out all the other
sounds around you,

and listen to the sound
of your own breathing.

Deep and rhythmic.

Hear the world around you.

Now you will hear only
the sound of my voice.

She even cured me of
my migraine headaches.

I've had them forever, and
nothing ever worked before.

Now, how did she do that?

She taught me self-hypnosis.

Simple as one, two, three.

Really?

She does that too, huh?

Sure.

How long have you
been working here?

Not long. A couple of months.

Why?

Well, I was just wondering,

does, uh, Miss Von Borg...?

Uh, when she
gives her treatments,

does she have an
assistant in the room with her

or does she give them alone?

It depends.

What is it that you
wanted, anyway?

Well, I was, uh...

just waiting for my wife.

Oh.

[LAUGHS]

Well...

I guess I'd better
get back to work.

[GIGGLING]

[♪♪]

The jewelry you took from
the Coopers is not here.

What happened?

Jonathan followed me.

And then what?

He took me to a
doctor this morning.

Who?

Dr. Chase.

He's a psychologist.

I want... [SIGHS]

I want you to come
back here this afternoon.

You will find a way.

Yes, Lily.

See you soon, Jennifer.

Thank you, Lily.

How was the body wrap, darling?

I'll find out about it later.

I had a long talk with
Lily's assistant today.

JENNIFER: Oh? Yeah.

Did you know that Laura
is one of her clients?

Really?

Yeah, and a lot of
your friends go to her.

Well...

her treatments are
certainly wonderful.

Word gets around, darling.

Why shouldn't some
of my friends go to her?

When she gives the treatments,

Lily is alone in
the treatment room

with the client, right?

That's right.

I think she's getting
a lot of information

that she shouldn't have.

Like what?

Like the code to the
Coopers' alarm system.

I had the code to the
Cooper alarm system.

They gave it to me

when they asked me
to water their plants

while they were away last week.

Did Michelle also give you

the combination of the
safe in their bedroom?

Don't you see, darling?

It all ties together, and
there's something wrong.

And I've gotta figure it out.

Now, the woman
is not legitimate.

But she's world-famous.

She may be world-famous,

but I still don't think
she's legitimate.

What are you doing?

I'm gonna call the club.

I had a tennis date
with Miles. Cancel it.

Not on my account, I hope.

No, it's just that
I don't want to

leave you alone.

Darling, I won't be alone.

Max is here.

I don't need a babysitter.

Yeah, maybe you're right.

I wouldn't mind
seeing Miles, anyway.

I can find out a little
bit more information

about his friend, uh, Lily.

Uh-huh. Good.

And remember, Dr. Chase
said that we're just supposed to

carry on our lives... as usual.

You're not to treat
me like an invalid.

Okay.

What are you gonna do?

I'm gonna wheel
myself into the kitchen

and play gin with Max.

Okay, I'll see you later.

[♪♪]

Hey, Miles.

I saw your Lily Von
Borg Salon today.

Is that how you keep
those boyish good looks?

[LAUGHS]

It was just, uh, a
minor skin irritation.

She took care of it for me.

Oh, yeah? I thought she
was strictly for the ladies.

Oh, well, uh...

Wherever the ladies are,
old Miles can't be far behind.

Come on. Serve up.

[HISSES]

Follow the bouncing ball.

Guess I don't feel
much like singing today.

Service.

[PHONE RINGING]

I'll get it.

Hello?

Jennifer?

I want you to come now.

All right.

Max.

Uh... let's finish this later.

Mrs. H, you can't
quit on me like this.

All I need is one
card for gin...

I feel like getting
some fresh air, Max.

And... and why don't I
just go pick up some...?

Some special dessert for dinner?

I'll keep you
company. No, no, no.

I'd rather go alone.

Look, I know Jonathan's
on to something.

He was asking me
questions about you.

Yes, I had a feeling
he was a bit too chatty

with my assistant.

But be calm, Miles.

There is no reason to panic.

I mean, soon
Jennifer will have...

outlived her usefulness,

and we will simply move
on to another subject.

I mean, Jennifer has
no memory of any of this.

So your Mr. Hart
can't really prove

that we're involved in any way.

I think you're underestimating
Jonathan Hart, Lily.

He's a very shrewd man.

Well, if he's shrewd enough
to become an obstacle...

that's too bad.

We will just have
to deal with that.

[SIGHS]

Oh, Lily, come on, uh...

I mean, I need money,

and I've been willing to
betray old friends to get it.

But I'm not getting
involved in anything heavier.

Neither am I.

Directly.

You see, she's completely
under my control.

She'll do anything and
everything I suggest.

Including disposing of
her husband, if necessary.

I don't know, Lily. Uh...

You know, Miles...

you have to get over that

innate distrust
you have of people.

It doesn't become
you, my dearest.

Hm?

[EXHALES]

MAX: She wanted fresh air.

Said she might pick up
some dessert for dinner.

Uh, I already called
the pastry shop.

She was as okay as you or me.

She made it very clear
she wanted to be alone.

Said she'd be right back.

Yeah, she'd better
be right back.

Look, Mr. H. You told
me to keep an eye on her.

You didn't say
hold her a prisoner.

Yeah, I know, Max. I know.

[♪♪]

[♪♪]

Stop.

Come away from
the air, Jennifer.

That's right.

Walk to me.

She was really gonna jump.

Of course.

With the drugs I've been using,

she's been able to respond
to my every command.

You've made your point, Lily.

No more doubts?

Good.

We have one more
job for you, Jennifer.

Concentrate on the
sound of my voice.

Yes, Lily.

This afternoon, you will
pay a visit to your bank.

And if Jonathan
tries to interfere...

you will kill him.

You will kill Jonathan if
he tries to get in your way.

Now, Jennifer, tell
me, what will you do...

if Jonathan tries
to get in your way?

I will kill him.

JONATHAN: Darling?

I was thinking that it
would be a good idea

to drive up to Mrs. Johnson's

and have a piece of
homemade apple pie.

But I have some errands to run.

I thought you already
did some errands.

I did, but I didn't
get them all done.

Well, uh, can't they wait?

Well, I'd sort of like
to clean them up.

How about tomorrow?

Sure, tomorrow would be fine.

Good.

You sure are busy
these days, aren't you?

Well... I'm trying to
keep my mind off things.

And Dr. Chase

did say that we should carry on

with our normal routine.

Is Max gonna drive you?

No, I'm gonna take
the station wagon.

Well, why don't I take
you, and then afterwards...?

Oh, that's all right,
darling. I feel fine.

I really do.

I'll see you at dinner.

[♪♪]

Punctual until the very end.

I like that, Jennifer.

Come in.

LILY: Quite a
collection, isn't it?

[EXHALES]

[LAUGHS]

This will be worth a small
fortune on the black market.

And this is only the beginning.

As we have proved
that it can work.

Thanks to Mrs. Jennifer Hart.

Where is she, by the way?

In the treatment room.

Out.

[♪♪]

[WHISPERS] Darling.

[SMALL GASP]

Darling. Jon...

[EXHALES]

Lily, um...

Oh, Miles, we
already discussed this.

We can't carry this
amount of jewelry

without some sort of protection.

Take it, now.

Come on.

I'm going to awaken Jennifer
and send her on her way.

I'm sure that she'll
be very happy

to go back to being
Mrs. Jonathan Hart.

A lot poorer and none the wiser.

[GASPS]

It may not work
out that way, Lily.

I believe that
that belongs to us.

I'm amazed at you, Miles.

Treating an old
school chum like that.

Not to mention what
you've done to my wife.

Jonathan.

Give me the bag.

Give me the bag.

[GRUNTING] [GUNSHOT]

[GUNSHOT]

You don't mind if I let the
police in on your treatment.

Jennifer.

Remember our
previous conversation?

Lieutenant Grey, please.

Jonathan... put down the phone.

GREY: Hello?

Hm?

Kill him, Jennifer. Hello.

[INAUDIBLE SPEECH OVER PHONE]

Now.

Do it.

[GUN COCKS]

[♪♪]

[OBJECT CRASHES]

Hey. What's going on in there?

JENNIFER: I'm just trying to get

Lily Von Borg out of my life.

Aha.

That is it. From now on,
it's just soap and water.

Au naturel.

Just the way I like it.

Uh-huh.

Oh, there's just two more
things in my bag over there.

Lip-gloss and blusher.

Darling, did you
go shopping today?

Shopping? No, not really.

What did you really do?

Well, to be
perfectly honest, I...

I went to thank Mr. LaJoie
for being so understanding.

Dr. Chase...

said you could have
some reoccurring impulses.

Really?

Mm-hm.

Well... [LAUGHS]

to be perfectly honest again...

I did see something there

that was absolutely
irresistible.

Uh-huh.

A gold watch.

Isn't it beautiful?

I knew you'd love
it. Oh, it's marvelous.

But, uh... do y...?

Jonathan.

You don't think that I...?

No, of course not. Are you sure?

Did you?

Well... to be
perfectly honest, I...

I did pick up a little...

something to go with it.

What else?

[IN FRENCH ACCENT]
The bill for the watch.

You are bad.

Ain't I just?

[♪♪]

[♪♪]