Hart to Hart (1979–1984): Season 1, Episode 15 - Which Way, Freeway? - full transcript

This is my boss, Jonathan Hart.
A self-made millionaire.

He's quite a guy.

This is Mrs. H. She's gorgeous.

What a terrific lady!

By the way, my name is Max.

I take care of them, which ain't easy...

'cause their hobby is murder.

Gee, the dog's eating like a bird.

Well, Max, what do you think?

Wow, Mrs. H., that's some costume.

Don't you dare offer me a carrot.



Well, I'm ready.

Where's your animal costume?

This is it. I'm going as a penguin.

If you don't wear your animal costume,
you're not gonna be a penguin.

-You're gonna be a chicken.
-Easy, Bugs.

What's the matter, Mr. H.
didn't you like the costume I got you?

-Yeah, I liked it. It was okay, Max.
-No, you didn't.

I'm sorry, Mr. H.,
but they didn't have a big selection.

It was either that costume,
or half a horse costume...

and not the good half, either.

Max, you see, it wasn't that I didn't like it.
It's just that...

well, I felt a little silly.

If you ask me,
everybody at that party's gonna feel silly.

What do you mean, Max?
It's for a good cause.



This costume party will raise
a lot of money for the animal shelter.

-I guess animals need money, too.
-Come on, we better get going.

Mr. H., if you're going to the party
in that get-up...

people will be handing you their coats
and asking you for drinks.

Right. But just think of it,
you'll make a fortune in tips.

All right.

All right, I will wear the costume.

That's the spirit, Mr. H.

Look at that. Freeway didn't eat a thing.

Where is Freeway? I hardly see him
anymore. Does he still live here?

He hardly comes home anymore.

He's in love. Freeway's got a girlfriend.

Really? He never said anything to me.

Who is she?

I don't know her name,
but I think she's a local girl.

He's crazy about her.
He doesn't eat, he doesn't sleep.

Poor thing.
I hope she doesn't break his heart.

Well, you never can tell with women.

I thought you'd take the news rather poorly.

Well, why shouldn't I?

I am being accused, aren't I?

-I was suspicious of you all along.
-Really?

Yes.

It was hard for me to believe
someone as young and pretty as you...

would be attracted to me...

albeit I'm extremely wealthy.

-I didn't hear any doubts at the time.
-No.

I thought, "Why fight it?

"She's young, attractive,
and she's available.

"Who cares what her motives are?"

Well, Steven...

what are you gonna do about all this?

You'll leave this house at once.

I didn't send for you. Where's Annette?

She's been given the day off, sir.

-By whom?
-By me.

Take that tray out of here.

Today.

Out of this house. Today!

Susie!

Susie.

There you are.
Where did you get your little friend?

He's a beauty. Oh, yes. Nice boy.

What are we gonna do now?

There's only one thing we can do.

But today is so soon.
This could upset everything.

Darling...

there are gonna be millions in jewels
just waiting for us at his store.

And if we don't act now...

you're gonna be bussing trays
for the rest of your life.

All right, let's go. Who wants it? Go on.

Come on, come on. He gets it. Come here.

That's a good girl.

What's happened
to the back of your neck here?

You need another grooming. You do, yes.

Oh, that's better.

Good girl.

I didn't think
you'd take the news so personally.

What do you want? More severance pay?

It was always part of my plan
to get rid of you.

You've just made it necessary
to advance the date, that's all.

No!

Joey, help!

Joey! Stop!

Get her off me!

Go after those dogs.
The little one's got the gun!

It's got my prints on it. Hurry!

Come on, Freeway. What's the matter?

You know,
he's trying to show us something.

What is it, Freeway?

That's Freeway's new sweetheart.

Nice girl.

-What's the matter, girl?
-Look, she's hurt.

Yeah, she has been hurt.

Better get her to a vet.

-Steady, now.
-Attagirl. Easy now.

Which one of you do I treat first?

Good baby.

There's a good baby.

-Do you know what caused this injury?
-No, I'm afraid not.

Our dog, Freeway,
brought her home with him.

Do you think somebody could have
beaten her, Doctor?

That's hard to say. Possibly.

She's okay now, though,
and that's what counts.

-Thanks a lot, Doctor.
-My pleasure.

I assume you're going
to the animal shelter benefit.

Well, we were,
but it's a little late for that now.

That's too bad, Mr. Hart.
Your costume is unique.

-What did I say?
-Thanks, Doctor.

All right, there you go.

There we go. Any idea who the owner is?

No, we don't.
But we'll look around in the neighborhood.

Well, I'm sure
the owner will be looking for her.

She's a very expensive dog.
Yep. A real high-class pup.

Well, Freeway always did have
expensive tastes.

It runs in the family.

-It's okay. I buried him.
-Good.

We gotta get that gun back.
That's just all there is to it.

Come on, Eileen.
Things are getting too screwed up.

Why don't we just forget
the rest of the plan...

take what we have,
and get out of the country?

$7 million worth of diamonds
are coming into Baldwin's store...

on Monday afternoon.

I am not leaving without them.

Forget them, Eileen,
we've got enough already.

I want them!

Joey, come on now.

Don't panic on me now. I need you.

Whose house did the dogs go to?

Some people named Hart.

-Jonathan and Jennifer Hart.
-Fine.

If they get in our way....

nobody likes a nosy neighbour, right?

So much for the Dudley O'Haras
of the Boston O'Haras.

-Who's next on the list?
-Steven Baldwin...

-of the jewellery store Baldwin's.
-I've met him. He's a real gem.

Our gardener says he's a mean old buzzard.

Well, our gardener should know.

He's the best bird watcher
in the neighborhood.

So, you recognise the place?

Be it ever so humble.

Don't. Annette will answer the door.

What are they doing here?
You think they found the gun?

-Relax. We'll just have to wait and see.
-This is just not gonna work.

Yes, it will. We'll stay out of sight.

Yes?

Hello. We're Jonathan and Jennifer Hart,
your neighbours from down the street.

-Won't you come in?
-Thank you.

Is Mr. Baldwin in?

-Yes, but....
-Good. Darling, will you get the dog?

-Dog?
-Yes.

If you tell him that Jonathan Hart is here,
I'm sure he'll see me.

We worked together
on the Governor's campaign.

It's Susie.

Susie, where did you run to?
I was so worried.

I was so.... What happened?
Was she in an accident?

We're not sure, exactly.
This is Mr. Baldwin's dog?

-Of course it is.
-Could we see him?

I don't know. He seldom sees anyone.

Why don't you ask? He might see us.

Jonathan. Jonathan Hart.

Come on in, please.

-Steven. Glad to see you.
-So nice to see you.

-Have you met my wife, Jennifer?
-I'm delighted.

Thank you.

Your dog was injured.
Spent the night at our house.

Susie? Did she.... Come here, Susie.

Come here, girl. Come on, Susie.

Come on now.

Yes. Nice girl. Thank you.

-What's happened to her?
-We thought you could tell us.

Our dog brought her home
yesterday afternoon. She was hurt then.

We took her to the vet.
He said it looked as if she'd been beaten.

Beaten?

Susie? Now who would do a thing like that?

And why?

-Maybe someone was trying to steal her.
-Maybe.

I will keep a closer watch on her
from now on.

It's nice to see you again, Jonathan.

I would love to spend a lot of time
with you two...

but I have an urgent business report
to take care of.

You look very well, Steven.

Why, thank you.
Yes, I'm feeling much stronger these days.

I feel better up here.
That makes all the difference in the world.

-I'm glad to hear it.
-It's so nice to see you again.

-Thank you.
-And the lovely Mrs. Hart.

-Thank you.
-Goodbye.

Say goodbye, Susie. Go on, say goodbye.

What a charming man.

-Yeah, that's what's so strange.
-What's so strange?

Well, it's just that the Baldwin I knew
was exactly what the gardener said...

a mean old buzzard.

Well, people change,
sometimes for the better.

Well, how did I do?

You were too nice.

Baldwin was a nasty old man.

Hart said that they worked
on a campaign together.

They must have been friends.

In the future, just say as little as possible.
It's the safest way.

But I'm an actor.
I like as many lines as I can get.

Anyway, I think he bought it.

As long as the employees at the store
buy it tomorrow.

That's all that matters.

What time will the jewels arrive?

The armoured truck always comes
in the early afternoon.

Now, instead of putting the jewels
in the safe...

you will tell the manager you want
to deliver them to the client personally.

Say an oil sheik bought them.
No one will question you.

Then off to Mexico.

This thing about the gun still bothers me.
Why didn't those people find it?

You saw the dog take it into their estate.
He probably buried it. Dogs bury things.

Well, what happens if he digs it up?

Well, a dead dog can't dig up
any buried secrets, can he?

Mr. H., are you sure they won't mind
Freeway on the golf course?

If he stays in the golf cart,
no one will say a word.

But what if they do?

We'll tell them Freeway's a three handicap.

-Say, can I have some of that action?
-Max, I love you.

I'll take anybody's money.

You can send the cheque right to the bank.

I'll be glad to take your cheque now
if you want, Max.

Oh, yeah? That's what you think,
'cause this is my lucky day.

You're supposed to hit the ball, Max.
The ball.

The game ain't over yet.

See?

Did he pay you off or something?

Come on, you can tell me.

-That was very, very good, darling.
-Fabulous.

-Very good.
-It has to be. You're catching up with me.

You bet I am.

Your turn, Max.

-I don't know about this.
-You can always call the bet off, Max.

No, Mrs. H. That's one thing I never do.

I never welsh on a bet.

Now, let's see.

Max, you sunk it.

That's me, Mrs. H. Grace under pressure.

That's a fantastic putt, Max.

Well, that gets me.... That puts me
at about par, don't you think?

-I think we're being hustled.
-Could be.

What's the matter with you?

Freeway. Come here, boy.

Come on.

Freeway, are you all right?

Why would anyone want to....

K-l-D-N-A-P him?

I think someone was trying to K-l-L-L him.

Stop, thief! Come back here with my shoe.

Freeway.

Give me my shoe. Freeway!

Come on, you stinker.

-Good morning, Mrs. H. Want some coffee?
-I'd like my shoe.

Freeway, what are you doing?
You moving out?

And where's my shoe?

He's been acting real strange
since yesterday.

I'll say.

Darling, did you see my other....

-Where'd you find that?
-Freeway.

-Boy, he sure is acting strange.
-He sure is. You want some coffee?

Yeah, thanks.

He hasn't hidden shoes
since he was a puppy.

Don't get all in an uproar.

He's having a disassociative reaction,
that's all.

-Having a what?
-That's what they call it.

It's like when a big shock happens
to a person...

and he acts all childlike. Do you get it?

Max, where did you hear that?

I saw a dog psychiatrist
on one of these TV talk shows.

Anyway, I'd still like my shoe back.

Maybe if we looked in the places
that he hid things when he was a puppy.

He was such a cute little ball of fur,
wasn't he? Remember?

The sofa.
He used to hide things behind the sofa.

He used to hide things in the birdbath
outside, too. You remember that?

Yeah, and behind my bed,
he used to hide things, I remember.

Darling, eureka!

What?

-I found it.
-Oh, thanks.

It looks like Freeway's been keeping
another little secret. Look at that.

All this because Freeway's sweetheart
happens to be Steven Baldwin's dog.

You'd better call the police, Max.

I wonder whose prints are on this thing.

Let's go over this thing again.

First, Baldwin's dog is injured,
so Freeway brings her here.

Then we go over to Baldwin's house, and
he seems kind of strange, at least to me.

Then someone tries to kidnap Freeway.

Then we find this gun.

-Could that gun be Baldwin's?
-Maybe.

Lt. Gillis, please.

-You know what I'm thinking?
-What?

You haven't been to a jewellery shop
for a long time.

Why don't we go to Baldwin's
and see if he's having a sale?

No, I don't think that's you.

Mr. Hart.

I brought these for you from the vault.

These are $25,000.

This pair is nearly $50,000.
They're exquisitely cut stones.

Now, both of them are excellent
investments, as I'm sure you'll agree.

Well?

I just can't make up my mind.

-Well, maybe Steven can help us decide.
-Maybe.

-Is Mr. Baldwin here today?
-Yes.

But I'm the manager, and I doubt that
he could assist you any better than I can.

I'm sure if you tell him we're here....
We're friends of his.

Never mind, darling. I really don't
feel like buying jewellery today.

If you'll wait for just a moment,
since you are acquainted with Mr. Baldwin...

I'm sure he'll be only too happy
to help you make your decision.

Thank you.

Well, what do you think?

Beautiful, exquisite, lovely,
absolutely gorgeous.

And I don't mean the earrings.

Mr. Baldwin will be here in just a minute.

The Harts.

What a pleasant surprise.

-Hello, Steven.
-Hello.

-My assistant, Eileen Nash.
-How do you do?

-Hello.
-How do you do?

I understand you have a problem
that I might be able to solve.

No, not really, I just can't make up my mind.

Take them both.

Both, indeed.

I have some new items in my office.

Eileen, could you bring them in
for the Harts to see?

-Of course.
-Thank you.

How's that dog of yours, Steven?

Susie. Fine, just fine.

Nothing's wrong?

Of course not.

What do you mean?

Nothing. It's just that our dog has been
a little upset lately, that's all.

Animals are like children.
They get over things very quickly.

Thank you, Eileen.

I think this necklace will go very well
with those earrings.

Oh, that is lovely.

But I just can't make up my mind.

I don't know, darling.

When we were in the shop, I looked
at his shoes. His heels were worn down.

Now, how could a man
who is confined to a wheelchair...

wear the heels of his shoes down?

All right, so if he isn't the real
Steven Baldwin, where is Steven Baldwin?

I don't know. Maybe if we could get
into the Baldwin estate, we could find out.

-How can we do that? They know us.
-We'll find somebody that they don't know.

Did somebody call?

Yes?

Forgive me for intruding.

I'm from the Norton Termite Service.

Mr. Baldwin called for our free inspection.

I'm sorry, Mr. Baldwin isn't in right now...

and I don't believe we'll be needing
a termite inspection.

That's too bad.
Well, you can't say I didn't try.

Pardon me, could I trouble you
for a glass of water? I'll stay right here.

-Water?
-It's a long walk up from the road.

But if it's too much trouble, I understand.
I don't wanna bother you.

-It's no bother.
-What a beautiful place you've got here.

You're lucky to live in a place like this.

But for a girl as pretty as you,
I suppose you must be used to the best.

-Would you prefer coffee or tea?
-Tea would be wonderful, thank you.

They just keep snooping and snooping.

You stay here. We'll be back
before the armoured truck gets here.

A few loose ends we've gotta take care of.
Come on.

I should be bitter right now, but it's been
a good job, and I saved money...

although Mr. Baldwin
has never been very generous.

-When are they leaving?
-Today.

I came home from my day off.
First thing, I'm fired.

They tell me they're closing the house
and going.

-Where to?
-Mexico City.

I don't think they wanted me to know,
but I overheard them on the phone...

making their plans.

You just can't explain some people,
can you?

Oh, I can explain it.

I don't like to tell secrets...

but it has to do with
that young woman Mr. Baldwin found.

She's too sexy, if you ask me.
"Assistant," he calls her.

She's gonna make a fool of Mr. Baldwin,
mark my words.

Well, what can I say? Men aren't interested
in mature women anymore.

They like them young and sassy.

Some like them mature and sassy.

-Some do, eh?
-Some really do.

The police lab says the serial numbers
on the gun were filed off.

-No prints, either?
-There were prints.

They belong to a woman working
a con game involving wealthy people.

-Couldn't be one Eileen Nash?
-They're not quite sure.

They're waiting for a wire photo
from Washington.

The way Washington is working these days,
they might have a long wait.

Thanks, Max.

I don't like this, Eileen.

It's too dangerous.

I don't want the Harts to find that gun.

Besides, if you had used some brains,
it would have been taken care of yesterday.

There, it's working.

Now don't mess it up.

Come on.

-I put the dogs in the kitchen.
-No, that's not good enough.

-Where should I put them?
-Don't put them anywhere.

Kill them.

Be quiet.

Freeway? Where are you, boy?

Freeway? Here, boy.

I looked everywhere.
Freeway's not down here.

-He's not outside.
-It's no use, Freeway's gone.

And I think I know where. Come on.

Let's have a look.

Hello?

Anybody home?

-I'll check upstairs.
-I'll look outside.

-Be careful.
-Right.

freeway?

Freeway? Here, boy.

-Anything?
-Nothing.

Jonathan! Max!

-We don't have to worry anymore.
-Worry? Who's worried?

I knew Freeway would be all right.
Ain't that so, pally?

Susie.

What is it, girl?

Now it all fits.

Everything is in order, as always.

Thank you very much.

Thank you, Mr. Baldwin.

-Good afternoon, sir, ma'am.
-Good afternoon.

Spectacular.

These are some of the most beautiful jewels
we've ever received.

Yes, they're nice. They're very nice.

-Don't you agree, Eileen?
-Yes, Mr. Baldwin.

-Do you want them put on display at once?
-No.

No, I have an important buyer for these.
He's in oil.

I'm going to meet with him personally.

-Mr. Baldwin. You're not taking these--
-It would be unthinkable for this client...

to come to my shop.

But the risk.

Do you want one of our guards
to accompany--

I have made other arrangements.

Just as you say, sir.

So it was Steven Baldwin's body
you found in the greenhouse?

That's very interesting, Lieutenant.

Because the manager of Baldwin
and Company told me...

that Mr. Baldwin left
with two of his companions...

with enough jewels
to pay off the national debt.

Don't you get it, Lieutenant?

He was an impostor.

Makeup. Mustache. Fake hair. Clever, huh?

I also think if you check out the bullet
that you find in Baldwin's body...

that will match up with the gun
that Freeway found.

Don't mention it, Lieutenant.

Any time. We're always glad to help out.

Makes us feel like real citizens.
You know what I mean, Lieutenant?

Thanks. Bye bye.

Did he put an all-points out on them?

It better reach to Mexico,
because that's where the maid told me...

that they were headed for.

We better get to the airport.

Check out all parties of three
booked south of the border.

I hope you're satisfied, Mr. Hart.
We held up that flight to Mexico City...

for 45 minutes
while we checked out your party of three.

-Let me guess. It wasn't them.
-Right again, Mrs. Hart.

You're absolutely sure?

It was a United States senator,
his wife, and nephew.

-They were very annoyed.
-Now, that hurts.

Maybe they were on another flight.

There isn't another flight until tomorrow.

Maybe you should check
all the international flights.

Now, let us handle it, please.

Excuse me.

Do you think this could be some sort of
a diversion to take us off the track?

Maybe they're going on a boat.

No, too many people.

Maybe they got their own boat, like a yacht.

-How about that?
-That's a possibility.

If they could charter a boat,
they could charter a plane.

-Do you think they did?
-Why not? They got plenty of money.

Hello. This is Operations.
Give me the Tower, please.

Hello, Tower, this is Operations.

Has any plane filed a flight plan
for Mexico City today?

Thanks.

There's a private plane leaving in 15 minutes
for Mexico City from the charter field.

You'll never get over there in time, Mr. H.

-It's way at the other end of the airport.
-We'll get there, Max.

You get on the phone,
get a hold of the airport police...

-and tell them to meet us at the charter field.
-Right, Mr. H.

Hello. This is Operations.
Get me the Security, please.

The airport police. Hello?

Cool it. If we run,
we'll call attention to ourselves.

Think you can drive this thing?

What a question.

Security. Come in, Security.

What if the phony Baldwin and the others
aren't on the charter plane?

Well, I don't know about you,
but I'm gonna plead insanity.

There they are!

Let's cut them off at the pass.

The plane, hurry.

No, we can't make it.
Get back to the car. Come on.

-That was pretty nice driving.
-You didn't do so badly yourself.

There's only one thing.

-What's that?
-You have to pick up all that luggage.

I'll flip you for it.

-Call it.
-Heads.

You lose.

-Come on. I've got my high heels on.
-Think of how cute you'll look bending over.

What a good idea.

Well, Max, look at you, all spiffy.

All dressed up
just to take the dogs for a walk?

I'm taking Susie and Freeway to Annette's.
She's making lunch for us.

That's great, Max. Have a nice time.

Thanks. See you later.

-More wine?
-Why not?

You know, it's really kind of nice...

and quiet, isn't it,
with Max and Freeway and Susie gone?

Only thing is that we're all dressed up
and we have nowhere to go.

Yeah, that's true.

Maybe we can do something about that.

The only thing is that
we wouldn't be all dressed up anymore.

Yeah.

You can't win them all.