Hart of Dixie (2011–2015): Season 1, Episode 5 - Faith & Infidelity - full transcript

Dr. Hart?
My name is Dr. Harley Wilkes.

I'm from BlueBell, Alabama.

EMMELINE:
Harley Wilkes was your father.

- What?
- He left you his practice.

He shares it with Dr. Breeland.

And Brick-- he's been waiting
a long time

to get BlueBell all to himself.

We haven't met.
I'm Dr. Zoe Hart.

I'm not going to share this office,
not for one minute.

EMMELINE:
Zoe, this is Lemon Breeland.

You're Brick's daughter, right?



I'm, uh, George Tucker.

You're the mayor?
Lavon Hayes, the linebacker?

You share a generator
with the guy in the gatehouse.

Wade Kinsella.

[Popping]
Aah!

Notice how whenever I come around,
there's always sparks?

- Hello there, Dr. Hart. - Are you sure
you want to be seen talking to me?

Yeah, I'll take my chances.

GEORGE:
I have no interest in Zoe Hart.

Then there's no problem,
then, is there?

You don't talk to her,
and then everyone sees

that we are on the same team.

[Flies buzzing]

[Buzzing continues]



[Panting]

Great.

[Dog barking in distance]

[Church organ playing
in distance]

[Organ music grows louder]

Let us pray.

Dear Lord,
we humbly bow our heads

before Thee this day,
and ask...

[Door creaking]

Hello.

I'm so sorry.

With these doors, uh,
you should put some money

in the basket for WD-40.

Sorry.

Good-bye.

Hart of Dixie
1x05 Faith & Infidelity

Everyone was in church.

Everyone.

It's like the world ended.

I couldn't even buy
a cup of coffee.

That should be against
some kind of law.

Morning to you, too,
sunshine.

Want to know why I'm not in
a great mood this morning, Wade?

Hmm?

It's because
a Hitchcockian swarm of flies

were buzzing in my ear
all night long.

And you want to know
why I have flies?

Because your front porch
is a cemetery

for takeout containers,
empty beer bottles

and half-eaten waffles.

I told you you should fix
that hole in your screen.

- Yeah, and you told me that
you would fix it. - Maybe.

But you should be nicer to me.

'Cause when all those
nice churchgoing people

get whooshed up to Heaven
in the Rapture,

gonna be just me and you left
to repopulate the Earth.

Listen, cowboy, I have
a very important week coming up.

Brick has left
for his fishing trip,

which means I finally have
the practice all to myself.

So I need to be
better than great

so that the patients
still see me

even after Brick gets back.

But I can't do that
if I haven't had any sleep.

Cowboy?

Cowboy.

[Imitates guns firing]

[Blowing]

So Daddy's gone--
we should make the most of it.

Romantic night?

- Romantic night, huh?
- Mm-hmm.

You mean no father,
no little sister,

no, uh... no 13th
committee members?

Oh, no, baby,
just you and me--

All night.

All night?

Why, Lemon Breeland,

are you planning on,
uh, seducing me?

I may be.

I'm on the fence, though.

Maybe I should give
you a little push.

[Chuckles]

So we're on, then?

- Mm-hmm.
- But not tonight

or tomorrow night,
because I have to finish

my project
for the Memory Matrons.

How's Thursday sound?

Thursday sounds fine.

Well... [sighs] except it
might be a little late.

I'm going to be taking
depos out in Mobile,

and, well, you know how
rough that road back can be.

I was stuck behind a tractor
for an hour last week.

Okay, well, then,
late it shall be.

And I'm going to pamper you,
sweetheart,

because I hate that you've
been working so much.

Oh, it's okay.

Look, a lot of good people
got defrauded in the spill.

And this class action suit
is going to help them out.

Besides, Mobile
is growing on me.

The guys took me
to this amazing

little tapas place last week.

- Tapas? [Chuckles]
- Yeah.

Since when do you like tapas?

I don't know.
A while.

I'll tell you what,
we should go sometime.

Of course. Tapas. Yum.

Of course we should.
I can't wait.

Not Thursday, though.
Oh, there's Delia Ann.

I better go compliment
her outfit.

She is picking out the new head

of the Mobile Bay
Memory Matrons this week.

All right? I'll see you.

Oh, Delia Ann!

Delia Ann.

[Laughing]

[Knock at door]

- Well, hello there.
- Hello.

[Cautiously]:
Hi...

I'm the Reverend Mayfair.
This is my wife Beverly.

How do you do?

Uh, listen, uh,
if this is about

that whole church door thing
this morning,

- I am so sorry.
- Oh, no.

Don't you bother yourself
about that at all. No, no.

Actually, we're here

to officially welcome
you to BlueBell.

Okay, this is the point
where you hand me

a pamphlet or something?

Excuse me?

You give me a cake,

and then I have to come
tour a time share

in the rectory or something.

I don't know what
you're used to, sweetie,

but down here, a Bundt cake
is just a Bundt cake.

So you don't want me
to come to church?

No, of course we want you
to come to church.

ZOE:
You're just not trying

to get me to come to church?

You're very welcome
to come to church.

If I take this Bundt cake,
it's not an implied contract

that I will come to church?

Um, we'll just leave the cake

right here on the porch,
and you can decide.

And, uh, on the first Sunday
of every month

we host a pancake breakfast,
and we hope you can come.

- Uh, but you don't have to.
- Don't have to.

- Bye-bye.
- All right. Bye-bye.

REVEREND & BEVERLY:
Nice meeting you.

LAVON:
Hi.

I'm Lavon Hayes,
and I'm itch free...

where it counts.

Hi. I'm Zoe Hart,

and I am freaked out
at the moment.

This jock itch cream wants me
as their spokesperson.

Did you believe me?

That you're itch free
where it counts?

Yeah, but I don't want
to think about it.

You know, it's commercial

and a print campaign--
the works.

Very lucrative offer.

But it's humiliating, right?

Not unless you want
the whole world

to think you used to have
rashy junk.

And "no" it is.

What's with the cake?

Oh.

It's a quote-unquote
"present"

from the friendly neighborhood
preacher and his wife.

Oh, the Mayfairs?

Yeah, they seem to think
it's okay to drop in unannounced

and bully you
into coming to church.

Zoe, the Mayfairs
are kind people.

- I'm sure they were just trying
to be good neighbors. - In New York,

being a good neighbor
is leaving each other alone.

Yeah, well, BlueBellers

aren't exactly known
for leaving anything alone.

They're doing a pretty good job
of it, ignoring my practice.

Ooh, speaking of which...

Oh! Yeah.

Big week, huh?

Ding-dong, the Brick is gone.

[Imitates explosion]

Cake?

Sure. Why not?

♪ ♪

Hello. Dr. Hart's office.

Only Dr. Hart,
no one besides Dr. Hart.

Dr. Hart speaking.

[Clears throat]

Hello.

I'm Dr. Hart,
the one and only doctor

who will be taking care
of you today.

Oh, great.
I'm Addy Pickett,

and I am the one and only nurse

who will be taking care
of you today.

What?

Brick asked if I could
help out this week.

Figured you might need a hand.

- Brick thinks I need a babysitter?
- Whoa.

I'm no babysitter.

I'm a registered nurse
with 15 years of experience,

eight of which were here
with Harley and Brick,

so I know this office
like the back of my hand.

So I believe the words
you're looking for are:

"Thanks, Addy.
Appreciate the help."

[Door opens, bell jingles]

Hey, Doc.

Crazy Earl needs
a once-over.

What happened?

Old man was passed out drunk
underneath my boat trailer.

I backed over him.

You ran over him?

I didn't... Sit down.

I didn't run over him, okay?

I was going fishing,
and I backed

over him with my boat trailer,

which weighs next to nothing.

Sir, are you having
any trouble breathing?

[Wheezing]

Okay, we don't need
to do that anymore.

Pulse is fine.

See there?
He's drunk as a skunk.

You couldn't hurt him
if you tried.

Now all the good fishing
spots are going to be gone.

Really? You ran over him,

and you're annoyed?

Like I randomly check
to see if anyone

happens to be passed out
underneath my boat.

I was asleep.

You are pretty.

And you are lucky.

No broken bones, your abdomen,
it's soft and non-tender.

I think you're going to be fine.

No thanks to you.

Let's get you
in there to lie down.

I think you could use a nap.

The last time I tried that,
I got run over.

Backed over.

ADDY:
Oh, Dr. Hart?

Here are some test results
that just came in.

Normally,
I'd leave them for Brick,

seeing as
how it's his patient and all,

but these look
a little time-sensitive.

Okay. What...
what test results?

Peter Mayfair.
Looks like he was in last week.

Ah, yes, the good and
right Reverend Mayfair.

Sprained halo?

Not exactly.

Syphilis?

Reverend Mayfair and his wife
are on their way over.

- Both of them?
- Well, I only asked

for Peter to come,
but you know how they are.

Well, they're always together.

It's inspiring, really--
a true love story.

Oh, that's funny--
I don't remember

the syphilis part
in Romeo and Juliet.

Watch your tongue.

That's our preacher
you're talking about.

I'm sorry.

Do we have any other patients
scheduled for today?

Nope.
Of course, it's not a surprise.

You're not exactly assimilating.

But I listen to the words
of Reverend Mayfair.

I want to be
a good Christian woman,

so I'll give you a tip.

How's my hair look?

- What?
- How's my hair look?

Bigger than it did
two hours ago.

Exactly.

Standing appointment
at the salon every Monday.

Now, do I need
my hair done once a week?

No, I do not.
But the beauty parlor

is the absolute best place
to bond,

gossip, show the people
in this town

you're serious
about being one of them,

and maybe even pick up
a patient or two.

- Really?
- Yeah, you should give it a try,

maybe fix those highlights
while you're at it.

All right. I guess...
beauty parlor I can do.

Let me call Susie,
butter her up for you.

Oh, y'all have a seat.

REVEREND:
Thank you, Addy.

Dr. Hart, we meet again.

Listen, Mrs. Mayfair,

I have to go over
your husband's test results,

so if you wouldn't mind
just waiting outside...

Dr. Hart, that's all right.
We share everything.

Yeah, about that...

I just think that
you'd be more comfortable...

BEVERLY:
It's fine, Dr. Hart.

If Peter has anything at
all wrong with him,

I need to be here.

We realize you didn't call him
in here to tell us he was fine.

Okay.

Just gonna come right
out and say it.

You've tested positive
for syphilis.

But the good news is,
it's easily cured.

Just a round of antibiotics,
and you're all set.

I'm sorry, I don't understand.

Is-Is there
some other kind of syphilis

other than the-the one...

Did you possibly mean psoriasis?

His skin is unusually dry.

No, I meant syphilis.

Dr. Hart, I'm married.

For 23 years.

Clearly, there's been some
sort of mix-up down at the lab.

Now, this kind of thing must
happen all the time, right?

Sometimes.

Not really.

I guess, technically,
it's possible...

Well, there you are, you see?
So let's just retake that test

and I'm sure this whole thing
will be cleared up.

Or maybe... maybe
we should wait

for Dr. Breeland
to come back.

No!
No, I will run it again.

Now, I don't want to alarm you

or cause you any more discomfort
than you're already feeling,

but we need to test you, too.

LEMON:
It is a matter

of propriety.

The Memory Matrons and our
esteemed leader, Delia Ann Lee,

believe that the bridge over
Jumping Frog Creek

deserves restoration.

For 105 years,

the covered bridge was the very
symbol of our town.

But then came the storm
to end all storms--

Katrina.

And our beautiful bridge

was taken from our warm embrace,
and with that,

Mr. Mayor,
our hopes and our dreams.

Okay, was that
too much hopes and dreams?

- No, it's perfect.
- So dramatic.

It's like a movie trailer:
"Then came the storm!"

Okay, now y'all just ruined it.

Oh, Lemon, relax.
Why are you so nervous?

Delia Ann Lee put me
in charge of this, okay?

Delia Ann Lee herself.

I think that she is grooming me
to take over the Memory Matrons

just like...
just like my mama did.

I didn't even think
she liked you.

It is called tough love,
AnnaBeth.

All right,
you are always hardest

on the ones you like the most.

Like in An Officer
and a Gentleman?

Yes, like An Officer
and a Gentleman, mm-hmm.

But ladies, I can only get the nod
if I can convince the mayor

to use the redevelopment funds
to rebuild the bridge.

So, hopefully, my candy diorama
will sway him.

Mayor Hayes has a
huge sweet tooth.

- Oh, it's in the bag.
- Mm-hmm.

There's no way the mayor won't
love your presentation.

LAVON: I hate these stupid
presentations.

I swear, it is the worst
part about being mayor.

Every year I got to sit through
these dog and pony shows

to convince me to use the
redevelopment money

for whatever fool
thing they thought of.

[Chuckles]

And come election time,
you'll be called the fool who did it.

So don't do a fool thing, Lavon.

You know what you should do?
You should use that money

to widen the road come off of
Highway 98.

The road? Yeah, that's
a good suggestion.

I'll think about that.

No, no, wait, wait,
I'm-I'm serious about this,

'cause every time
I go to Mobile for work,

I get stuck behind
a huge tractor

or a herd of cows or something.

It's just getting ridiculous.

If you widen that road,
then... Hey, Zoe.

- Hey.
- If you widen that road,

then maybe buses'd actually
come in the center of town,

instead of dropping
people off at the spur.

ZOE:
Yeah, if you fix that road,

maybe ambulances could actually
get here in an emergency.

See that?

- That's life or death. Thank you, Zoe.
- Uh-huh.

That is a great point.

See, what better way to spend
the money?

LEMON: This is the perfect
use of the money.

And the model looks both
beautiful and delicious.

Mmm. When the Memory Matrons
finally recognize you,

all this time and hard
work is gonna pay off.

GEORGE: All right, look,
I'll tell you what...

we'll shoot for it.

Half court.

Best of five.

If I win, we use the money to
fix the road.

[Both chuckling]

Okay.

- Let's see what you got, Tucker.
- Oh, Lord.

Democracy at work--
really makes you proud.

[Door bells jingle]

Oh, morning.

I made coffee,
but we're out of cream.

But in a shocking twist, nothing
on the schedule this morning,

so I figure I'll step on out and
get some now that you're here.

Maybe get some breakfast, too,
seeing as we are

free, free, free.

Oh, Mayfairs'
test results came back.

You're kidding!

So it wasn't a mix-up
at the lab.

I can't believe it.
The Mayfairs?

Addie, it's an unwritten
rule in every E.R.--

the sweeter they seem,
the more depraved they are.

The Mayfairs are not depraved.

Well, maybe not both of them.

Since the minister
exhibited first,

he's probably patient zero.

Which means now I have to tell
the perfect little minister's wife

that her husband had an affair.

Oh, hold on there.
You don't know that.

Well, I suppose Beverly could
have been the one who cheated,

but it's unlikely, given--

I mean, you don't know
either of them cheated.

It's syphilis.

This is the minister and his wife
we're talking about.

They're role models.

You mess that up,
you could do a lot of damage.

I'm not gonna do any damage.

I'm just gonna give her the
information, plain and simple.

[Sobbing]

It's okay, it...

It's okay. Shh!

Shh...

My-My whole life
I have... only

had sexual relations
with one man.

Then I guess we both know how
you must have gotten syphilis.

[Sobbing]

Deep breaths.

There you go, deep breaths.

But-But Peter loves me.

I-I... I trust him.

I know.

Don't blame yourself.

I wasn't.

Good, good.

Look, I know that this is a shock,
but people cheat.

Even the people
we trust the most.

Oh... [Sobbing]

But hey, hey, what do I know?

Am I married?

Clearly not.

So why don't we just get
that penicillin shot over with, okay?

[Sniffles]

It's more of a butt thing.

Why don't we go
back to my office?

♪ ♪

My, Zoe,
you look real pretty tonight.

Thanks, Tom.

Any wine you have not
from a box, please.

That's funny, I remember boxed
wine being your Achilles heel.

Slutty Achilles high heel.

Just pour it.

You know,
that guy you almost killed

is fine, by the way,
thanks for asking.

[Indistinct conversations]

Why don't you just ask me
what they're talking about?

Because I don't care.

- Really? 'Cause it's big news.
- And yet, I don't care.

I mean, if BlueBell had a gossip rag,
this'd be the cover story.

Which I wouldn't read.

Well...

Okay!

What's going on?

The minister
and his wife split up.

Apparently, somebody
planted a bug in her ear

that the minister cheated.

TOM:
My goodness!

Who would say
a cruel thing like that?!

Sad.

I'll take the whole bottle
to go.

There's a terrible rumor going
around town.

It's about the Mayfairs.

Ah, right. I may have heard
something about that.

Obviously, it's just some
huge misunderstanding.

Oh, I'm pretty sure it's not.

What did you do?

- Me?
- Yeah.

I just did my job.

I certainly did not
split them up.

Whatever happened with the
Mayfairs is not my fault.

Okay, so you are not involved

in propagating rumors
that the minister was unfaithful?

I didn't propagate any rumors...
exactly.

Look, even if I did know
something, I couldn't talk

about it, because of
doctor-patient confidentiality.

But come on, you can't
act that surprised.

A minister having an affair?
That is so cliche.

Oh, enough with
the New York thing.

Lavon Hayes does
not do cynicism.

And neither does BlueBell.

We believe in
the Mayfairs, Zoe.

Lavon, 50% of marriages
end in divorce.

You know, life goes on.
People survive.

I'm sure this town has something
better to talk about.

It makes you wonder
how long it's been going on.

- Mm-hmm.
- And with whom?

And when in the world
did Peter find the time?

I mean, those two
are always together.

Oh, there's always
time for a quickie

if one is highly motivated.

[Laughing]

Can I help you, Sugar?

Yeah, I think Addy called.

I'm the new doctor in town.

Zoe Hart.

First exam is free.

Right.

What can I do for you, hon?

Looks like you need a trim.

Some highlights, for sure.

I've been going to Sally
Hershberger since I was seven.

She just gets crazy jealous.

I don't want to put you
at any risk.

- Mm-hmm.
- Maybe just a blow out?

Sure thing.
Have a seat.

Oh! [Laughs]

My! Delia Ann!

You're here early.

I wasn't expecting you
till this afternoon.

May I get you some sweet tea?

Oh, no need.

I was just admiring
your beautiful diorama.

Oh, thank you so much.

I've worked so very hard on it.

And the presentation
for the mayor is ready, too.

Oh, is that so?
What on earth for?

Excuse me?

Do you take me for a fool?

I-I... I don't understand...

I know all about it, Lemon.

How you let George
circumvent the system.

Just to widen a road.

Is there anything even remotely
historical about a road?

I... I have no idea what
you're talking about.

Oh, really? So you don't know
that George has been playing

back-door politics
with the mayor

and the redevelopment
money has already

been committed
to a road project.

Honestly, Lemon,
bless your heart,

but if you can't control
your own fiancé,

how in the world
can you expect to command

an important organization
like the Memory Matrons?

But, uh...

You know, my bedroom window
overlooks the rectory.

And for 15 years, not a peep.

And then, suddenly,
all hell is breaking loose.

Mm.

Sorry I'm late.

No prob, sweetie.

I thought it must be
someone else, but no.

It was Peter and Beverly.

Now, I couldn't make out

the words exactly,

but they definitely were angry.

I'm not so sure
it wasn't Beverly's fault

that they split up.

She's been acting
real different lately.

Wearing lipstick.

She had me do her toes
a few weeks back-- purple.

Oh!

Well, it could be

Peter tried to put
his foot down.

Want his old Beverly back.

[Laughs]

No, it's my fault!

I'm the reason
the Mayfairs broke up.

It was me!

[Whimpers]

Come on, Lavon.

Clearly, that shampoo girl
slept with Reverend Mayfair.

You know, how much
more proof do you need?

Did she say she slept with him?

No.

But I have Addy
out looking for her,

so I'll be able to confirm it
soon enough.

Why you doing this?

Why do you have to believe
the worst in people?

People cheat, Lavon.

Lots of people.

Yeah, the Mayfairs
ain't like that.

They are honest, decent people.

They love each other,
they have faith in each other,

and I have faith in them.

Fine. Have faith.

I have science,
and I am sure I'm right.

You sure?

Yeah.
Science tells me

that I'm 99% sure
that Reverend Mayfair cheated.

So you admit there's a one
percent chance that he didn't.

You know what?

No, I don't.

Because people cheat.

People that you love and trust.

Just like my mother
did to my father.

There is no one percent.

That is just the statistical
margin of error.

Wow.

This looks, uh...

What is it?

Herbed goat cheese crostini.

Shrimp stuffed zucchini balls.

Tapas, George--
your new favorite food.

Oh, okay.

Well, that's so, so nice of you.

That's, uh...
[Chuckles]

Thank you.

So glad you like them.

Is something the matter?

Oh. Nothing at all.

I mean, you did

go behind my back
and get the mayor

to use my redevelopment money

for a new road project,
but it's no big deal.

It's trivial, tiny,
just like your tapas.

[Chuckles]

Wait, since when have you been

interested in
the redevelopment funds?

I've been talking about
the covered bridge project

for the past three months.

[Sighs]
Oh.

Sweetie, you just,

you have so many projects,
you know.

Sometimes it's just, you know,
in one ear...

There's a diorama
in the living room!

I'm so, so sorry.

It was really just
a spur of the moment thing.

I mean, I just

happened to mention the road,

and then Lavon,

he thought it was a great idea.

I apologize.

I should have remembered.

Okay?

[Sighs]

Now you can go back and
get my money from the mayor.

Yeah, I'm not gonna go do that.

Excuse me?

I mean, sure, honey,

I mean, the covered bridge
is beautiful,

but it doesn't serve
any actual function.

It functions as a reminder...

Of the past, yeah.

But BlueBe can't keep
dwelling on the past, Lemon.

We got to look to the future,
too, you know.

We go and upgrade
that road into town,

it's gonna increase tourism,

it's gonna improve
our quality of life.

I mean, Zoe Hart
even thinks that

we can go ahead
and save some lives, you know.

It can cut down
on ambulance response times.

[Scoffs]

Oh, is that
what Zoe Hart thinks?

Well, if Zoe thinks
that we need a new road,

then I guess
the discussion is over.

Come on, Lemon.

Good night, George.

Wait, I thought
I was staying over.

Oh... is that what you thought?

Or is that what
Zoe Hart thought?

Think again George Tucker.

EARL:
Pretty lady!

This is good-bye!

You've got to be kidding me.

Earl!

Why the long face,
Mr. Mayor?

Just got off
the phone with my agent.

You know, I thought since
the jock itch people wanted me,

there might be other
endorsement oportunities.

Turns out I was wrong.

Well, on the bright side,

at least people with itchy junks
still love you.

I heard about your new road.

Okay.

Yeah, it's gonna be awesome.

Is it?

The Memory Matrons have a meeting
set with you next week

to peach restoring the bridge
at Fall's Creek.

No offense, but
that's another reason

I'm glad I chose a road.

The ramifications.

Lemon and
the rest of the society,

worked day and night
on that presentation..

There was a candy diorama
just for you...

And now she's in trouble
with Delia Ann.

I'm telling you,

if Lemon gets kicked out
of the Memory Matrons,

it will be all your fault.

I didn't realize...

I-I'm sorry.

Tell Lemon...

Hey, uh, Crazy Earl's on
the roof of the hardware store..

He said he's gonna jump.

[People murmuring]

It's okay, Earl,
just take it easy.

Don't do anything rash.

I'm gonna jump.

Isn't anybody gonna do anything?

Don't you have a wacky volunteer
fire department or something?

Well, they don't
like to be called

on their poker night, so...

I'm jumping!

Tell my family good-bye!

Somebody should go up there.

Isn't there a social worker
or suicide hotline?

Oh, honey,
that's just Crazy Earl.

You people think I'm cynical.

Hey, you want a pretzel?

I steal them from work
and keep them

in case I go somewhere
there's nothing to eat.

What?!

Good.

I'm jumping!

[Crowd chuckling, murmuring]

SHELLEY:
Whoo-hoo!

Go, Wade!

Okay, time to come down.

No!

I'm not moving!

Come on, Earl.

You're not gonna jump.

Here I go!

No!

Damn it, Earl, come with me!

Stop this!

EARL:
I won't.

I'm not gonna do it.

Now, come on.

Look at the doc down there.

She's about to pee her pants.

Come with me

before you hurt yourself.

Only if you do it.

No.

Well...

Say good-bye,
everyone!

♪ Moon River ♪

♪ Wider than a mile ♪

♪ I'm crossing you ♪

♪ In style ♪

♪ Someday ♪

♪ Oh, dream maker ♪

♪ You heartbreaker ♪

BOTH:
♪ Wherever you're going ♪

♪ I'm going your way ♪

TOWNSFOLK:
♪ Two drifters ♪

♪ Off to see the world ♪

♪ There's such
a lot of world to see... ♪

I'm done.

♪ We're after the same ♪

♪ Rainbow's end ♪

♪ Waitin' round the bend ♪

♪ My huckleberry friend ♪

♪ Moon River and me. ♪

[Cheering]

Okay, okay.

Hey, Dad.

It's time to go home.

Let's go.

Dad...?

Every month, Earl cashes
the government check

and then heads straight
for the liquor store.

Then he gets drunk
and he climbs up on that roof.

And every month, his son comes
and sings him down.

Wow.

I had no idea.

You know what?

Yeah, maybe 99 out of 100 people
will disappoint you.

I don't know.

I think you find
the magic of the world

in the margin of error.

I've been calling.

Started to get scared

you dropped
your phone in the toilet.

Again.

Come on, Lemon, you want
to tell me what's going on?

I mean, 'cause I know
that you can't really

be jealous of Zoe Hart.

I'm not jealous of Zoe Hart.

She has no manners,
dubious breeding

and hair like a grill brush.

She and I aren't even
in the same universe.

Okay, then, you want to
tell me why you've been

acting like a crazy person
ever since she came to town?

It's what she represents,
George.

Ever since she got here,
you're the one that's changed.

From your new friends in Mobile,
to the tapas and the road.

And do you even realize

that the last three DVDs
that you bought

for movie night
were Woody Allen,

Martin Scorsese and Nora Ephron?

You love Nora Ephron.

All right, you know,
that's besides the point.

It is like Zoe Hart has flipped
some New York switch in you

and you are just not
the same person anymore.

You know what?
That's ridiculous.

I... [Chuckles]

All right, fine.

I miss New York sometimes.

I lived there for two years.

I'm not gonna just sit here
and pretend it didn't happen.

I don't want you
to pretend, George.

I want you to want to be here.

Not wondering what sort of
cosmopolitan thing

is around the corner

or trying to make BlueBell
into something that it's not.

I like the way
that things are here.

I like that we are off
the beaten path.

I like that
there's no rush hour,

and there are only four people

that work
in the police department

because nothing bad
ever happens here.

It is enough for me.

Lemon...

Hey, look, BlueBell is my home.

I chose to come back here.

And once, you chose to leave.

And how do I know that
someday you won't miss it

and take that fancy new road
of yours right back out of town?

Lemon.

Found the shampoo girl.

She's in the waiting room.

I hope you know
what you're doing.

The whole town's up in arms
about the Mayfairs.

Pancake breakfast is tomorrow.

If people don't turn up,

that's an entire tradition
you will have broken.

Just send her in.

Hi.

Please have a seat.

Listen, I'm sorry for
dragging you in like this,

but we have a medical...
situation on our hands.

And I'm just wondering

if you've been experiencing
any random symptoms--

fever, sore throat,
rashes, sores?

Wow, you're a really
good doctor.

How'd you know that?

Just a hunch.

Why don't you tell me
what's been going on?

Well, a couple weeks ago,
I got this sore on my hand,

and now there's this rash
on my feet.

And I've got a canker
in my mouth that won't go away.

Let me take a look.

Ahhh...

A-ah.

Wanda...

- Hmm?
- There's a good chance

that you have syphilis.

Syphilis?

Isn't... isn't that a...?

Yeah. That's why
I need to ask you

who you've slept with
other than Reverend Mayfair.

What?

Gross!

I never slept
with Reverend Mayfair!

So, it's the minister's wife

you've been having
the affair with?

Ew!

What are you talking about?!

Look, I-I won't tell anyone,
but this is serious.

I need you to tell me the truth.

I am!

The truth is, I only have sex
with my boyfriend, Chase Cobb.

Been dating since we were 14.

But he's in the Navy now,

and I only see him
maybe twice a year.

Then what did you mean
in the beauty shop,

when you said that you had
broken up the Mayfairs?

I don't want to get anyone
in trouble.

Wanda, it's important.

I promised.

I pierced Mrs. Mayfair's
belly button!

I know I'm not licensed
or anything,

but I just do it sometimes
on the side, to make money.

And I gave one
to Mrs. Mayfair's niece

and then Mrs. Mayfair
wanted one,

but she's a preacher's wife!

Oh, I should've known better.

I guess Reverend Mayfair
took one look at it

and threw her out.

Oh, I'm going to hell, aren't I?

Addy, I need a blood test!

Then I'm going to need you
to track down

a sailor named Chase Cobb

'cause he's in big trouble.

Where you going?

I have to find the Mayfairs.

It turns out,
there is a one percent.

It would be nearly impossible

for anyone to deduce
that the girl

who gave you the
belly button piercing

would have had a
syphilis outbreak

on her hand when she did it.

Again, I am so, so sorry.

I'm the one who
should be apologizing.

I guess I just wanted
a moment to try and break free

of being the minister's wife.

I wanted to try and be
reckless for a moment.

- Look where it got me.
- No, it's me.

You see, I should have seen
how stifled you were.

BEVERLY: Mm, not stifled,
but it's such a big

constant responsibility

being someone the whole town
takes their every cue off of.

I know. Right?

Sorry.

It's just,
you two are the real deal.

Sweet, loving.

I've never met
people like you before.

And clearly, we can do better.

We will do better.

And the important thing is,

we're back together
and working things out.

- Mm. - And just in time
for the pancake breakfast.

Um... yeah.

About that, I don't think
anyone's coming.

The gossip and all.

That was my fault, too.

Brick leaves for a week,
I break the town.

Don't be silly, Zoe.

Sure, w-we all have
our doubts from time to time.

But there's one thing
we will always believe in.

BOTH:
BlueBell.

Hmm.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Hey.

Coffee.

And on a Sunday.

Maybe this town isn't
as backwards as you thought.

I saw what you did for your dad.

I thought it was...

kind of heroic.

When your dad's the town drunk,
you get used to climbing roofs.

That's all.

Doesn't mean anything.

Look, I'm heading back
to the plantation. Want a ride?

Actually... I think

I'm going to hang out
a little while longer.

♪ ♪

You were right.

New York changed me.

I learned to like the subway,

and I'd have a good slice of pizza
at 2:00 in the morning.

But at the end of the day,

none of those things matter.

The things that matter,
they haven't changed one bit.

I love you, Lemon.

I love you and I love BlueBell.

And I'll tell you what.

They could put an interstate
through the middle of this town,

and I promise you,
I'd still never want to leave.

♪ ♪

What's this?

I think it's time we started
looking for a house, don't you?

Come on.

[Sighs]

Oh, Delia Ann.

LAVON:
Delia Ann.

Can I have a word, please?

Oh, certainly, Mr. Mayor.

Good. I just wanted
to tell you

that Lemon Breeland's covered
bridge presentation, oh,

was very impressive.

- Really?
- Yeah.

You saw it?
The candy and everything?

Of course I did.

The candy diorama.

Delicious.

You actually ate that thing?

Well, I just wanted
to let you know

that, uh, because of
Lemon's outstanding work,

I moved some things
around in the budget

and was able to
find some extra funds

to put towards
the covered bridge.

I don't know what to say.

Thank you!

Oh, you're welcome.

Thank you so much,
Mr. Mayor!

How on earth did you
find the extra money?

Uh... well, let's just say,
uh, it wasn't easy.

[Clears throat]

[Sports broadcast plays on TV]

[On TV]:
Ah, I'm Lavon Hayes,

and I'm itch free--

where it counts.

[Stifled chuckle]

♪ ♪

Hey. Wait up.

You-you coming to church?

- A first time for everything.
- Okay.

I thought that
I could check out

what this whole one-percent
thing is about.

You think it matters
that I'm half-Jewish?

Oh, are you kidding?
The Reverend Mayfair

is a huge fan of the Old Testament.
[Chuckles]

But half-Jewish doesn't mean

you don't have to stay
for the whole thing.

The reason
that door is so loud--

so you can't sneak
out halfway through.

That is brilliant.

LAVON: The man knows
what he's doing.

- ZOE: Guess so.
- Guess so?

- Fine. The man knows what he's doing.
- And Amen.