Harriet the Spy (2021–…): Season 1, Episode 4 - Episode #1.4 - full transcript
You ever have one of those days
where you feel like
the whole world is against you?
You know what I'm talking about.
First woman in space, huh?
Yep. Bella Borisovna.
She's gonna be on TV tonight.
Makes me feel like I can do anything.
Rats! I better take the train.
Ooh.
No money, no subway. Keep moving. Come on.
How about giving me a dime?
Get outta here, kid!
Excuse me, Mrs. Garcia. Do you have
a dime I can borrow for the train?
- What?
- Mud.
Go!
Uh, I think I have a quarter.
Nope, it's a Canadian loonie.
- You see, I just got back from Montreal...
- I don't have time for loonies!
Fine, I'll just run home.
One foot in front of the other.
- Ow!
- Hey, watch where you're going, kid.
What else could go wrong?
Whoa, whoa!
Harriet! What have I told you
about running in the house?
I know. But I just had the worst day ever,
and I just wanna see
the lady cosmonaut on TV.
No excuses, young lady.
I want you to march upstairs
to your room right now.
Up in the vastness of space,
you feel truly alone, truly at peace.
Truly alone, truly at peace.
You know, after a day like this,
all I can say is...
I said no TV, Harriet.
Outer space, here I come.
Harriet, what's wrong?
The whole world.
Well, that and maybe
I ran in the house again
and broke a ton of plates,
and now Mom's super mad.
But, Ole Golly, can you talk to her
so I won't be in trouble?
Then I could still watch
the lady cosmonaut. Please?
I will do no such thing,
Harriet M. Welsch.
You've got to start looking out for people
besides yourself.
Why? Nobody's looking out for me.
That's simply untrue.
And besides, being sent to one's room
is good for creativity.
Ask Virginia Woolf.
"There is no gate, no lock, no bolt
that can set upon the freedom of my mind."
Quotes? At a time like this?
I'm better-off in my room.
I was not better-off in my room.
I was so mad, I couldn't sleep.
Mom and Ole Golly were in cahoots.
It's a wonder
I have any plates left at all.
She treats our home like it's
the running of the bulls.
Enough about the plates.
I had no choice but to
unleash every kid's secret weapon:
The dreaded silent treatment.
I would offer you breakfast,
but we're all out of plates.
Are you excited to see Janie and Sport
for your science project?
Ole Golly, I leave this one to you.
If Ole Golly thought
she was going to out-silent me,
she had another thing coming.
Ole Golly may have been
a master of silent treatments,
but luckily,
I was a super double-decker master.
"You have a grand gift for silence,
Watson.
It makes you quite invaluable
as a companion."
Enough with the quotes!
Gotcha. That's from
Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's Sherlock Holmes.
I don't care where it's from.
I can't believe you'd take her side
instead of mine.
Harriet, that's not fair.
At least take an umbrella.
It looks like rain again.
What wasn't fair
was that Ole Golly had betrayed me.
As mean as my mom and Ole Golly
had been to me,
the city felt even meaner.
Hey. Are you laughing at me?
You better not be!
Yuck.
This whole city stinks!
Before seeing my best friends,
I decided to shake off my bad mood
the way I always did.
My spy route.
I stopped by Mr. Withers's first.
Mom and I knew him from the flea market
where he used to sell his birdcages.
But we haven't seen him there for a while.
He's always home with his cats now.
And I don't blame him.
After all, he has 26 of them.
Now that's living.
I used to think Withers was a shut-in,
but maybe he's a shut-out.
He shuts out this rotten world
to give himself a little peace.
He's leaving? Oh, this I gotta see.
No takers again.
"Neighbors, I need a cat sitter
Saturday afternoon. Withers."
That's today.
This was the answer to all my problems.
If Mr. Withers was gone,
I could use his apartment to be alone
and shut out this whole rotten world too.
Hi, Mr. Withers. Hello, kitties.
Harriet, right? Oh, look at you.
I haven't seen you in ages.
How's your mother?
She's okay, I guess. For a mom.
To what do I owe this pleasure?
I saw your flyer.
Are you still looking for a cat sitter?
My. Oh, yes.
I have to go to Albany
to attend to some unpaid parking tickets.
And I would very much prefer to hire
someone I know to look after my beauties.
I'm Harriet M. Welsch, pleased to meet ya.
Your mother just gave her permission,
as long as you get your work done.
I assume you know what that means.
Work? Uh-huh, I'm on it.
Let me give you a tour of my domicile.
If you use the bathroom, make sure
to jiggle the handle. Kitchen nook, there.
And this is where I wrestle
a fistful of wires into a birdcage.
Mom and I love your birdcages.
But why do they have locks?
It's not just to keep birds in, Harriet.
It's to keep trouble out.
As for the cat food,
my beauties love this brand.
Now, there are a lot of cats,
so I made it easy.
The black cats are all named Bobby,
the ginger cats are all Tommy,
and the striped ones are Geraldines.
What about that spotted one,
the calico cat?
This is Ray, and there's just one of her.
Now, Harriet, there's something
very important you need to know.
There's a man. He's from animal control.
He wants to take my cats away.
If you hear a knock,
look through the peephole.
If you see a man in a brown fedora,
don't let him in, okay?
Your cats are safe with me, Mr. Withers.
Oh, that's what we like to hear.
Right, my beauties?
I'll be back by seven o'clock.
Don't miss me too much.
Ladies and gentle-cats, show of paws,
who wants to start with a little spying?
Me too.
Three, two, one.
Best clock ever.
Lone fork, I salute you.
What do you know?
Mr. Withers has a family.
Wonder why the picture is facedown.
- Outta the way, you ole crab apple!
- Make me!
Be quiet!
There's gotta be a way to...
How did she put it?
"In the vastness of space
you feel truly alone, truly at peace."
All systems are go, Captain Harriet.
Now entering the catosphere.
Good work, First Officer Ray.
Good work, crew.
Captain.
Time to enjoy all that peace
I've heard so much about.
Captain, apologies,
but it's my duty to report
you were expected at Janie's house
an hour ago.
Janie's house! The science project!
Hi, Janie. Yeah, I know. I'm sorry.
I know, I know. I...
Can we work on it later?
I'm kinda doing something
at Mr. Withers's and...
You wanna come here? Okay, see you soon.
Oh, whoa.
This is wild.
Oh. Hello. Hello. Hello.
How does he keep track of so many cats?
Well, good sir, there's Tommys, Bobbys,
and may I present the Geraldines.
Oh. I must say, old bean,
your mustache looks positively dashing.
Thank you, good sir.
It took ever so long to grow.
All right, old chums.
I call to order the business of the day.
It's time to make potato flashlights!
Okay, we've got insulated wire, pennies,
small zinc-plated rods, a tiny light bulb,
gloves for each of us
and a couple of small potatoes.
I don't get it. Why use some dusty spud
when there's batteries
at every corner store?
It's called connectivity.
The right parts coming together
to make a thing...
A thing work.
You okay, Sport?
- Oh, yeah. Don't worry.
- It's just a mild cat allergy.
Yeah, keep going, Janie.
Okay.
Well, first, you gotta
take the potato like...
Like this, and grab one of
these iron rods like this.
The spuds are pretty soft.
And you wanna jam the rod in
so it feels secure.
Copper on one side
and zinc on the other makes it so... Hey.
Give that back.
Okay. That's it.
This is not a conducive space for science.
What? This place is great.
Look what it's doing to Sport.
I've never felt better.
Let's go to my house.
I can't.
I promised Mr. Withers I'd watch his cats.
But we have to finish this project now.
Well, what if I don't want to?
What's that supposed to mean?
It means I came here to be alone,
as in by myself,
as in without you guys!
Fine. Be alone.
Come on, Sport.
See you later, Harriet.
Now, where were we?
Hey, Ray. Catch.
Got it.
- And the crowd goes wild.
- Very nice! Way to go!
Whoa, do you hear that buzzer?
Indeed. It's an incoming communication
from an alien ship.
More people? Ignore it, Officer.
Our mission is too important.
Okay, but it's really annoying.
Right, guys?
- Yeah, really annoying.
- Obnoxious.
It's the man
in the brown fedora. Animal control.
That was close. Too close.
If we're going to be truly alone,
send us to super-duper, double-duper,
deep-duper space.
That's a lot of dupers, sir.
First Officer, are you a cat or a mouse?
Cosmonauts, to your stations.
Wow. We're very far now.
I'm okay.
No Earth. No people.
No one to spy on.
The only thing I can think to write about
is that there is nothing to write about.
Maybe a little snack will cheer me up.
Yuck! Cat food? Oh, I must be losing it.
Hello? Is somebody there?
Keep it together, Harriet M. Welsch.
Those are just cats.
This is just a blackout.
And like a good spy,
you're always prepared.
Dang batteries.
Go away!
The alien ship has tracked us.
First Lieutenant Ray, get us out of here!
Ray? Bobbys? Tommys? Uh, Geraldines?
Leave us alone!
Harriet? It's Ole Golly. Please let me in.
Ole Golly.
Janie and Sport told me
they were worried about you.
Please let me in. I wanna help.
Oh, yeah, like you helped me
with my mom and the plates?
I don't trust you.
I just want to be alone!
Harriet, remember the quote by John Donne?
"No man is an island entire of itself;
Every man is a piece of the continent,
a part of the main."
I like my island fine, thank you.
Gotcha.
It had to be a quote.
Aw, I'm really glad to see you, Ole Golly.
Harriet, the cats!
No!
Six o'clock? Mr. Withers
is going to be home in an hour.
Harriet, let's go rustle up some cats.
We thought we'd check in on you.
We got two, but I saw at least ten
go that way. It was like a cat tsunami.
Wait! You guys, about before…
You can beg for mercy later.
Right now, we got cats to catch.
- Gotcha.
- Hey.
Stop right there.
Stay away, brown fedora man.
This man is from animal control.
He's going to get Mr. Withers in trouble
for having too many cats.
What?
I'm not animal control.
My name is Ray Withers.
I'm Jim Withers's older brother.
Older brother?
Ray? You're the older boy
from the photo I saw in the house.
I'm relieved to hear Jim
still has photos of me.
But if you're his brother,
why are you banging down his door?
It's a long story.
I've been trying forever to get Jim
to open his door and talk, but,
well, he won't let me in.
I guess he didn't want you
to let me in either.
I bet if you help us find his cats,
that would be one doozy of a door opener.
What do you say?
Count me in.
In a bazillion years,
I never could've guessed
what happened next.
Hey, this one of yours?
I thought
nobody in the world cared.
But here they all were, trying so hard
to help a complete stranger.
Hey!
Oh. Excuse me, sir.
That's very nice of you, sir.
And with everyone looking,
we found all the cats.
Well, except for one.
Where's Ray?
Harriet!
Eh, spots.
There!
I can't see anything in there.
Janie, do you still have
all that flashlight-making stuff?
Did Albert Einstein play violin?
He did. But one problem.
Ray took all the potatoes.
Ray, the cat.
- Will these do?
- Thank you, sir.
You're welcome, madam.
Let's hope this works.
Oh, over there!
Connectivity.
Connectivity.
I'm so happy to be home
with all my… beauties.
Hello, Jim.
What's he doing here, Harriet?
I told you not to let anyone in.
He just wants to talk to you.
I'm not talking to him.
Jim.
This is my home, my life.
And I just want to be alone with my cats.
The rest of you can go.
Mr. Withers, we are sorry
for the intrusion,
but Harriet needed a little backup,
and we came to help.
Jim, please.
Mom's been gone four years now.
You don't have to keep
suffering in silence.
Let's talk.
We can get through this together.
You gave him the silent treatment
for four years?
That beats my record.
When Mother left us,
all I wanted was to be left alone.
To have some space. But truthfully,
I've never been lonelier.
Space can do that to you, Mr. Withers.
I should know, I've been there.
I miss you, Ray. I miss Mom too.
I think we both could use some backup.
Thank you, Harriet.
Mr. Withers made me
this beautiful birdcage.
I spent this whole day thinking that
I could only be happy if
I found a way to get out of this world.
But now I think the trick is
you have to let the world in.
where you feel like
the whole world is against you?
You know what I'm talking about.
First woman in space, huh?
Yep. Bella Borisovna.
She's gonna be on TV tonight.
Makes me feel like I can do anything.
Rats! I better take the train.
Ooh.
No money, no subway. Keep moving. Come on.
How about giving me a dime?
Get outta here, kid!
Excuse me, Mrs. Garcia. Do you have
a dime I can borrow for the train?
- What?
- Mud.
Go!
Uh, I think I have a quarter.
Nope, it's a Canadian loonie.
- You see, I just got back from Montreal...
- I don't have time for loonies!
Fine, I'll just run home.
One foot in front of the other.
- Ow!
- Hey, watch where you're going, kid.
What else could go wrong?
Whoa, whoa!
Harriet! What have I told you
about running in the house?
I know. But I just had the worst day ever,
and I just wanna see
the lady cosmonaut on TV.
No excuses, young lady.
I want you to march upstairs
to your room right now.
Up in the vastness of space,
you feel truly alone, truly at peace.
Truly alone, truly at peace.
You know, after a day like this,
all I can say is...
I said no TV, Harriet.
Outer space, here I come.
Harriet, what's wrong?
The whole world.
Well, that and maybe
I ran in the house again
and broke a ton of plates,
and now Mom's super mad.
But, Ole Golly, can you talk to her
so I won't be in trouble?
Then I could still watch
the lady cosmonaut. Please?
I will do no such thing,
Harriet M. Welsch.
You've got to start looking out for people
besides yourself.
Why? Nobody's looking out for me.
That's simply untrue.
And besides, being sent to one's room
is good for creativity.
Ask Virginia Woolf.
"There is no gate, no lock, no bolt
that can set upon the freedom of my mind."
Quotes? At a time like this?
I'm better-off in my room.
I was not better-off in my room.
I was so mad, I couldn't sleep.
Mom and Ole Golly were in cahoots.
It's a wonder
I have any plates left at all.
She treats our home like it's
the running of the bulls.
Enough about the plates.
I had no choice but to
unleash every kid's secret weapon:
The dreaded silent treatment.
I would offer you breakfast,
but we're all out of plates.
Are you excited to see Janie and Sport
for your science project?
Ole Golly, I leave this one to you.
If Ole Golly thought
she was going to out-silent me,
she had another thing coming.
Ole Golly may have been
a master of silent treatments,
but luckily,
I was a super double-decker master.
"You have a grand gift for silence,
Watson.
It makes you quite invaluable
as a companion."
Enough with the quotes!
Gotcha. That's from
Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's Sherlock Holmes.
I don't care where it's from.
I can't believe you'd take her side
instead of mine.
Harriet, that's not fair.
At least take an umbrella.
It looks like rain again.
What wasn't fair
was that Ole Golly had betrayed me.
As mean as my mom and Ole Golly
had been to me,
the city felt even meaner.
Hey. Are you laughing at me?
You better not be!
Yuck.
This whole city stinks!
Before seeing my best friends,
I decided to shake off my bad mood
the way I always did.
My spy route.
I stopped by Mr. Withers's first.
Mom and I knew him from the flea market
where he used to sell his birdcages.
But we haven't seen him there for a while.
He's always home with his cats now.
And I don't blame him.
After all, he has 26 of them.
Now that's living.
I used to think Withers was a shut-in,
but maybe he's a shut-out.
He shuts out this rotten world
to give himself a little peace.
He's leaving? Oh, this I gotta see.
No takers again.
"Neighbors, I need a cat sitter
Saturday afternoon. Withers."
That's today.
This was the answer to all my problems.
If Mr. Withers was gone,
I could use his apartment to be alone
and shut out this whole rotten world too.
Hi, Mr. Withers. Hello, kitties.
Harriet, right? Oh, look at you.
I haven't seen you in ages.
How's your mother?
She's okay, I guess. For a mom.
To what do I owe this pleasure?
I saw your flyer.
Are you still looking for a cat sitter?
My. Oh, yes.
I have to go to Albany
to attend to some unpaid parking tickets.
And I would very much prefer to hire
someone I know to look after my beauties.
I'm Harriet M. Welsch, pleased to meet ya.
Your mother just gave her permission,
as long as you get your work done.
I assume you know what that means.
Work? Uh-huh, I'm on it.
Let me give you a tour of my domicile.
If you use the bathroom, make sure
to jiggle the handle. Kitchen nook, there.
And this is where I wrestle
a fistful of wires into a birdcage.
Mom and I love your birdcages.
But why do they have locks?
It's not just to keep birds in, Harriet.
It's to keep trouble out.
As for the cat food,
my beauties love this brand.
Now, there are a lot of cats,
so I made it easy.
The black cats are all named Bobby,
the ginger cats are all Tommy,
and the striped ones are Geraldines.
What about that spotted one,
the calico cat?
This is Ray, and there's just one of her.
Now, Harriet, there's something
very important you need to know.
There's a man. He's from animal control.
He wants to take my cats away.
If you hear a knock,
look through the peephole.
If you see a man in a brown fedora,
don't let him in, okay?
Your cats are safe with me, Mr. Withers.
Oh, that's what we like to hear.
Right, my beauties?
I'll be back by seven o'clock.
Don't miss me too much.
Ladies and gentle-cats, show of paws,
who wants to start with a little spying?
Me too.
Three, two, one.
Best clock ever.
Lone fork, I salute you.
What do you know?
Mr. Withers has a family.
Wonder why the picture is facedown.
- Outta the way, you ole crab apple!
- Make me!
Be quiet!
There's gotta be a way to...
How did she put it?
"In the vastness of space
you feel truly alone, truly at peace."
All systems are go, Captain Harriet.
Now entering the catosphere.
Good work, First Officer Ray.
Good work, crew.
Captain.
Time to enjoy all that peace
I've heard so much about.
Captain, apologies,
but it's my duty to report
you were expected at Janie's house
an hour ago.
Janie's house! The science project!
Hi, Janie. Yeah, I know. I'm sorry.
I know, I know. I...
Can we work on it later?
I'm kinda doing something
at Mr. Withers's and...
You wanna come here? Okay, see you soon.
Oh, whoa.
This is wild.
Oh. Hello. Hello. Hello.
How does he keep track of so many cats?
Well, good sir, there's Tommys, Bobbys,
and may I present the Geraldines.
Oh. I must say, old bean,
your mustache looks positively dashing.
Thank you, good sir.
It took ever so long to grow.
All right, old chums.
I call to order the business of the day.
It's time to make potato flashlights!
Okay, we've got insulated wire, pennies,
small zinc-plated rods, a tiny light bulb,
gloves for each of us
and a couple of small potatoes.
I don't get it. Why use some dusty spud
when there's batteries
at every corner store?
It's called connectivity.
The right parts coming together
to make a thing...
A thing work.
You okay, Sport?
- Oh, yeah. Don't worry.
- It's just a mild cat allergy.
Yeah, keep going, Janie.
Okay.
Well, first, you gotta
take the potato like...
Like this, and grab one of
these iron rods like this.
The spuds are pretty soft.
And you wanna jam the rod in
so it feels secure.
Copper on one side
and zinc on the other makes it so... Hey.
Give that back.
Okay. That's it.
This is not a conducive space for science.
What? This place is great.
Look what it's doing to Sport.
I've never felt better.
Let's go to my house.
I can't.
I promised Mr. Withers I'd watch his cats.
But we have to finish this project now.
Well, what if I don't want to?
What's that supposed to mean?
It means I came here to be alone,
as in by myself,
as in without you guys!
Fine. Be alone.
Come on, Sport.
See you later, Harriet.
Now, where were we?
Hey, Ray. Catch.
Got it.
- And the crowd goes wild.
- Very nice! Way to go!
Whoa, do you hear that buzzer?
Indeed. It's an incoming communication
from an alien ship.
More people? Ignore it, Officer.
Our mission is too important.
Okay, but it's really annoying.
Right, guys?
- Yeah, really annoying.
- Obnoxious.
It's the man
in the brown fedora. Animal control.
That was close. Too close.
If we're going to be truly alone,
send us to super-duper, double-duper,
deep-duper space.
That's a lot of dupers, sir.
First Officer, are you a cat or a mouse?
Cosmonauts, to your stations.
Wow. We're very far now.
I'm okay.
No Earth. No people.
No one to spy on.
The only thing I can think to write about
is that there is nothing to write about.
Maybe a little snack will cheer me up.
Yuck! Cat food? Oh, I must be losing it.
Hello? Is somebody there?
Keep it together, Harriet M. Welsch.
Those are just cats.
This is just a blackout.
And like a good spy,
you're always prepared.
Dang batteries.
Go away!
The alien ship has tracked us.
First Lieutenant Ray, get us out of here!
Ray? Bobbys? Tommys? Uh, Geraldines?
Leave us alone!
Harriet? It's Ole Golly. Please let me in.
Ole Golly.
Janie and Sport told me
they were worried about you.
Please let me in. I wanna help.
Oh, yeah, like you helped me
with my mom and the plates?
I don't trust you.
I just want to be alone!
Harriet, remember the quote by John Donne?
"No man is an island entire of itself;
Every man is a piece of the continent,
a part of the main."
I like my island fine, thank you.
Gotcha.
It had to be a quote.
Aw, I'm really glad to see you, Ole Golly.
Harriet, the cats!
No!
Six o'clock? Mr. Withers
is going to be home in an hour.
Harriet, let's go rustle up some cats.
We thought we'd check in on you.
We got two, but I saw at least ten
go that way. It was like a cat tsunami.
Wait! You guys, about before…
You can beg for mercy later.
Right now, we got cats to catch.
- Gotcha.
- Hey.
Stop right there.
Stay away, brown fedora man.
This man is from animal control.
He's going to get Mr. Withers in trouble
for having too many cats.
What?
I'm not animal control.
My name is Ray Withers.
I'm Jim Withers's older brother.
Older brother?
Ray? You're the older boy
from the photo I saw in the house.
I'm relieved to hear Jim
still has photos of me.
But if you're his brother,
why are you banging down his door?
It's a long story.
I've been trying forever to get Jim
to open his door and talk, but,
well, he won't let me in.
I guess he didn't want you
to let me in either.
I bet if you help us find his cats,
that would be one doozy of a door opener.
What do you say?
Count me in.
In a bazillion years,
I never could've guessed
what happened next.
Hey, this one of yours?
I thought
nobody in the world cared.
But here they all were, trying so hard
to help a complete stranger.
Hey!
Oh. Excuse me, sir.
That's very nice of you, sir.
And with everyone looking,
we found all the cats.
Well, except for one.
Where's Ray?
Harriet!
Eh, spots.
There!
I can't see anything in there.
Janie, do you still have
all that flashlight-making stuff?
Did Albert Einstein play violin?
He did. But one problem.
Ray took all the potatoes.
Ray, the cat.
- Will these do?
- Thank you, sir.
You're welcome, madam.
Let's hope this works.
Oh, over there!
Connectivity.
Connectivity.
I'm so happy to be home
with all my… beauties.
Hello, Jim.
What's he doing here, Harriet?
I told you not to let anyone in.
He just wants to talk to you.
I'm not talking to him.
Jim.
This is my home, my life.
And I just want to be alone with my cats.
The rest of you can go.
Mr. Withers, we are sorry
for the intrusion,
but Harriet needed a little backup,
and we came to help.
Jim, please.
Mom's been gone four years now.
You don't have to keep
suffering in silence.
Let's talk.
We can get through this together.
You gave him the silent treatment
for four years?
That beats my record.
When Mother left us,
all I wanted was to be left alone.
To have some space. But truthfully,
I've never been lonelier.
Space can do that to you, Mr. Withers.
I should know, I've been there.
I miss you, Ray. I miss Mom too.
I think we both could use some backup.
Thank you, Harriet.
Mr. Withers made me
this beautiful birdcage.
I spent this whole day thinking that
I could only be happy if
I found a way to get out of this world.
But now I think the trick is
you have to let the world in.