Happy Days (1974–1984): Season 6, Episode 10 - The Claw Meets the Fonz - full transcript
The Fonz takes on The Claw after a small-time gangster tries to take over Al's Restaurant and turn it into a bookie joint.
♪ Sunday, Monday, happy days ♪
♪ Tuesday, Wednesday,
happy days ♪
♪ Thursday, Friday, happy days ♪
♪ The weekend
comes, my cycle hums ♪
♪ Ready to race to you ♪
♪ These days are ours ♪
- ♪ Happy and free ♪
- ♪ Oh, happy days ♪
♪ These days are ours ♪
- ♪ Share them with me ♪
- ♪ Oh, baby ♪
♪ Good-bye, gray
sky, hello, blue ♪
♪ There's nothing can
hold me when I hold you ♪
♪ It feels so right
it can't be wrong ♪
♪ Rocking and
rolling all week long ♪
♪ Sunday, Monday, happy days ♪
♪ Tuesday, Wednesday,
happy days ♪
♪ Thursday, Friday, happy days ♪
♪ Saturday, what a day ♪
♪ Groovin' all week with you ♪
♪ These days are ours ♪
- ♪ Share them with me ♪
- ♪ Oh, happy days ♪
♪ These days are ours ♪
- ♪ Happy and free ♪
- ♪ Oh, baby ♪
♪ These happy days
are yours and mine ♪
♪ These happy days are yours ♪
♪ And mine, Happy Days! ♪
Happy Days was filmed in
front of a studio audience.
- ♪ Well, you are the one ♪
- ♪ You're the one ♪
- ♪ That makes me glad ♪
- ♪ You're the one... ♪
- ♪ Any other one ♪
- ♪ You're the one ♪
- ♪ Makes me sad ♪
- ♪ You're the one... ♪
- ♪ When someday ♪
- ♪ You're the one ♪
- ♪ You want me ♪
- ♪ You're the one... ♪
♪ Well, I'll be
there, wait and see ♪
♪ Maybe, baby, I'll have you ♪
♪ Maybe, baby, you'll be true ♪
♪ Maybe, baby, I'll
have you for me ♪
♪ I'll have you for me ♪
♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪
- ♪ Well, you are the one ♪
- ♪ You're the one ♪
- ♪ That makes me glad ♪
- ♪ You're the one... ♪
- ♪ Any other one ♪
- ♪ You're the one ♪
- ♪ Makes me sad ♪
- ♪ You're the one... ♪
- ♪ When someday ♪
- ♪ You're the one ♪
- ♪ You want me ♪
- ♪ You're the one... ♪
♪ Well, I'll be
there, wait and see ♪
♪ Maybe, baby, I'll have you ♪
♪ Maybe, baby, you'll be true ♪
♪ Maybe, baby, I'll
have you for me ♪
♪ I'll have you for me ♪
♪ Maybe, baby, I'll
have you for me ♪
♪ I'll have you for me. ♪
Thank you.
Potsie Weber.
Thank you very much.
Well, that does it for
this set. Thank you, folks.
Rich, how come Al's got
us playing in the afternoon?
Oh, I don't know.
He's, uh, got some
kind of meeting going
with somebody
there in the kitchen.
Must be somebody
he's trying to impress.
Well, it can't be
the health inspector.
The place is still open.
Ah, don't you worry
about a thing, A.D.
A.D.?
Al Delvecchio.
Oh. A.D. Right.
With your personality
and our capital,
this place should
really take off.
Oh, I don't do too bad
right now, Mr. Holloway.
Sometimes I go 50, 60
customers in one night,
and some of them even order.
You've got to think big, A.D.
I mean, a chain of
Arnold's from coast to coast,
your own penthouse,
your own yacht,
your own limousine.
Well, you better
skip the limousine
'cause I get carsick
when I ride in the backseat.
Hey, could I ride up in
front with the chauffeur?
Sure, you got it, champ.
Right.
Hey, I want you
to meet the band.
Come here, Mr. Holloway.
- Mr. Holloway...
- Oh. How do you do?
- Meet the, uh... the, uh... the...
- Hi.
They don't have a name yet.
Oh. Promote the place.
Uh, let's call
them the Al Tones.
The Al Tones!
Or something else.
Well, these are my booths.
These are my customers,
happy customers.
- That's my jukebox.
- Oh.
And that's the girls'
room. We could skip that.
This is the men's room.
All right. Come on, open up.
Let me in.
Not by a hair on
my chinny chin chin.
Hey, Al.
What's going on here,
Al? I'm on the phone.
Overseas. Rome, Al, Rome.
- Huh?
- Sorry. Sorry.
Hey, look, look, look,
let me ask you a question.
- You know Italian, right?
- Oh, yeah.
What's the word for, uh...
Oh... I never
learned those words.
I never got a
chance to use them.
I'll use the
international language
of heavy breathing.
Oh, uh, we're very
continental here.
Oh, I can see that.
Well, listen, I've seen enough.
I'll come back tonight
and close the deal, huh?
Here's to a long and
prosperous partnership, A.D.
Yeah, well, I'm
looking forward to it.
Al, get a repairman.
I just melted the wire.
Hey, Fonz, Fonz,
we're dying to hear
about this
long-distance phone call.
Yeah, how'd you make
out with the Roman beauty?
Need you ask?
Fonz, well, what is this?
Yesterday Rio de
Janeiro, today Rome.
What's going on?
Well, I got this plan, see.
I-I want to get my own page
in the Magilla Book of Records.
That's right.
"Fonzarelli: Around
the World in 80 Chicks."
Hey. Hey, Al? Al?
You want something?
Big biz. Big biz. Big biz.
Big, big, big biz.
Yeah, Al. Uh, how'd
your meeting go?
Well, I don't want
to say it was good,
and I don't want
to say it was bad,
but you're now looking at
the next Howard Johnson.
Hey, uh, Mr. Johnson,
you want to come
out of the clouds
here and translate?
Oh, yeah, Fonz. You
know the guy who just left?
Yeah.
Well, he's with a very
big investment company,
and he wants to
invest in Arnold's.
He says I got a very
big potential here.
And he told me to
name my own price.
Hey, Al.
You'll need a commercial.
- Good idea.
- Hi, there.
Say, after a hard
day at the office,
there is nothing like
an Arnold Burger.
Ooh, I ate it!
Al, it must have been
pretty exciting, huh?
- I mean, the negotiations.
- Oh, yeah.
Your lawyer on this side,
their lawyer on that side.
Your accountant on this side,
- their accountant on that side.
- No.
- Your side of the
table - No, no...
- versus their side of the table.
- Rich, Rich.
- What?
- No.
No accountants, no lawyers.
- No?
- I mean, they're very expensive.
But I know the guy
to go get advice from.
Oh, good.
Hey, now, I don't want you
guys to worry about a thing
because I'm gonna take
you all to the top with me.
That's nice, Al.
Hello.
Yeah. Uh-huh.
Fonz, it's for you.
Go get her, Fonz.
It's the overseas operator.
Yo.
What?
All right, all right, all right.
Calm down. Calm down.
Here we go.
Marion?
- What is it, Howard?
- Richie, Joanie,
get down here quick.
What is it, Howard?
I'm busy. What...
- I bought something.
- Ooh!
- What?
- A color TV with a remote control!
No, it's not a color TV.
It's outside.
- Outside!
- Outside!
- You traded in the DeSoto!
- A car?
- Look. -JOANIE: A new car?
- Where is it?
Wh-Wh-Where...? It's stolen.
Oh...
No, Marion. Right here.
It's a new item for the store.
Look at this.
Oh, that's terrific.
Got to get back upstairs.
Jenny's in the middle
of a juicy piece of gossip.
Something about the
football coach wearing a dress.
Coach Bilford?
I got a date.
Well, Howard, I
have to fix dinner.
Well, wait a minute,
wait a minute.
A personalized doormat.
I think it's gonna
be a big-selling item.
Oh, but, Howard, how
many Cunninghams
are there in Milwaukee?
Marion, you can put
anything you want on it.
Oh.
How about "welcome"?
Just answer the door, will you?
Yeah, I got it.
- Hi, hi, hi, hi, hi.
- Hey, Al.
Something very important
came up, and I need your advice.
Well, Al, as I told
you at Arnold's, I feel
- that what you really need...
- Rich, Rich,
- I was talking to your father.
- Oh.
Of course, Al. Come on in.
What is it?
Well, Howard, a man
came to see me from the, uh,
Lake Michigan
Investment Company,
and he wants to
invest in Arnold's,
and he wants to expand it.
Oh, isn't that
wonderful, Alfred?
It sounds very
exciting, Al, but...
well, maybe you
shouldn't rush into this.
What do you know about Lake
Michigan Investments, huh?
Well, nothing, but the
guy's a very nice person.
Oh, sure, real nice.
Wants to call our
band the Al Tones.
Well, he may be
nice, but I still think
you ought to check it out.
To begin with, you ought to have
your accountant go
over their books, and...
and you'll need a
lawyer for the contracts.
You hear that, Al?
Same advice I gave you.
I have a nephew
who's almost a lawyer.
He sent in this matchbook
cover, and six years later...
Marion!
He needs a lawyer now.
Well, that's true.
Good luck, Al.
Thank you, Marion.
You know, Al, a franchise...
That's a lot of responsibility.
You sure you want
to get into this?
Well, Howard, every
man has his dream.
And you know what my dream is?
When I close my eyes,
I see myself walking
along this road
and I'm planting Arnold
Burgers as I go along.
Just like... Johnny Appleseed.
And sprouting up behind
me are thousands of drive-ins
with people of every
race, color and creed
coming up to me and saying,
"Hold the onions, Al."
Oh, that's a lovely dream.
Well, I got to go.
Wait a minute, Al.
How would you
like one of these, uh,
personalized doormats, huh?
Oh, thanks, Howard.
Two ice-cold glasses of milk.
That's the way to start
off a business meeting.
You got to keep a clear head.
A.D.
Oh, Mr. Holloway, come on in.
Come in.
Hey, have a nice glass of milk.
No, no, thanks.
I never touch it.
You got anything stronger?
Well, I could make
you a cherry fizz.
That strong, huh?
Well, maybe you
better forget it.
Partners, huh, A.D.?
Yeah, partners.
Well, not yet.
You see, before I make
a big decision like that,
I think we ought to
consult with an accountant,
- a lawyer.
- A lawyer?
Yeah, because a partnership,
there's a lot of things
to be considered.
I totally agree with you.
And here's something you
should consider right away.
Boys!
That's Leo...
Oh, hi, Leo.
And that's the Claw.
Claw?
You want lawyers, huh?
Show 'em, Claw.
The Claw.
No lawyers.
Well, I guess
this is it, old girl.
The end of the road.
It was fate that brought
us to this moment.
Fate.
And a guy with an iron hand.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Al. What is this?
What the heck is this?
What are these? What
the heck are these?
Rich, I'm taking a little trip.
A little trip, huh?
"Closed, for sale by owner."
That's no little trip.
Okay, I'm taking a big trip.
What is going on, Al? Come on.
- Rich, okay, it's good news!
- Yeah?
I sold out to Mr. Holloway.
Lots of bucks.
Boy, I'm gonna
make it on easy street.
Oh.
Oh, Rich, I can't lie
to you. He's a crook.
He's got a gang, and one
of them's got an iron hand.
Oh, they-they want
to take over Arnold's,
and-and they want
to make Arnold's
- into a bookie joint.
- What?
Well, I-I got to go, Rich.
I'll write you a letter
explaining everything later.
Hey, wait. Why don't
you explain it to me now?
Try and tell me how running
away is gonna help anything.
Rich, don't you see?
Selling the building's the only
way I'm going to stop them.
They're crooks.
Hey, Al.
All right, look. Don't
you sign nothing.
They're crooks.
- Fonz.
- Yeah.
You knew without me telling you?
That happens. It
happens sometimes.
Let me tell you something.
Nobody's gonna push one
of my friends out of town.
You understand that?
You just stay right here.
I'll be back.
- Fonz, Fonz.
- Yeah.
Mr. Holloway's gonna
come back in one hour.
Hey, that's enough
time. Don't worry about it.
Richie, let's get
the gang together.
- Right now.
- Right.
Get the gang together, Fonz.
Fonz, we don't have a gang.
We don't have a gang.
Fonzie and I called this meeting
for one very big reason.
These thugs are
trying to push around Al.
We can't let that happen.
Got any more soda, Rich?
No, we don't have any more soda.
Do you have any ideas?
- I got it...
- Ah, good.
- I got it.
- He's got it.
We send them a
threatening Candygram.
I'm going to pretend I
didn't hear that, Malph.
Hear what, Fonz?
I got it... we'll burn 'em out.
I definitely didn't hear that.
We'll burn them out.
I think we're
overlooking something.
I mean, why don't we
just call the police, huh?
- That's a great idea, Rich.
- Yeah.
What are you going to tell 'em?
Three guys want
to buy into Al's?
Well... well,
yeah, you're right.
They haven't done anything.
Okay, okay, no police.
But we have got to do something.
Hey, I'm doing it.
I'm keeping my ear
to the street, huh?
Bet you get kicked
in the head a lot.
All right, now, here's the info.
This gang was
kicked out of Chicago
for messing with the real Mob.
All right, then he tried to move
into Cleveland,
you know, lay low.
He was kicked out by the PTA.
Well, yeah, that was then.
Now he's got this new thug.
Guy they call the Claw.
Claw?
Yeah, man has an iron hand.
All right, now, look.
I know exactly what
these thugs are.
Bullies... that's it.
Fonz, you're going to
pound these guys, right?
I never use violence
unless I have to.
All right, Rich,
now, you tell me...
What are we supposed
to do against these guys?
Hey, I'm telling you, I
know exactly what to do.
You stand up to a
bully, he backs down.
You know, that's what
my dad always says.
Only way to deal with a
bully... Stand right up to him.
My dad told me to run.
My dad told me to stand
there and take it like a man.
Well, I think Fonzie's
got the right idea here.
I mean, if we can just
make a show of force,
those guys will back down.
Oh, yeah? That's
what Custer said.
Hey, I promise you, Ralphie,
nothing is going
to happen to you.
Oh, this is great. We'll
back those creeps down.
No way.
You're too young
for this kind of stuff.
Oh, I'm too young
for all the neat things.
Oh, you know, actually I'm
a lot younger than I let on.
Ralphie, I promised you
nothing is going to happen to you.
Fine. It's all settled.
We'll meet at Arnold's at 10:00.
- Great. Oh.
- Oh!
And you do not tell our parents.
Oh, what do you
think I am, a squealer?
No comment.
All right, any questions?
Should we eat first?
Sit down. Come on, let's
have... let's have this out.
- All right.
- Okay, uh, first thing we need to do
- is talk to Al, right?
- That's right. -Right.
And then, look, we tell
Al to move right in, okay?
Here's what we're going to do.
Ah, this is crazy.
Fonzie's plan is
never gonna work.
I'm getting out of here.
You look like you're in a hurry.
You're not trying to run
out on us, are you, partner?
No, I was just gonna
go outside and check
to make sure you got
a good parking space.
Ain't that nice?
- You're a good boy.
- Yeah.
Hi, Leo.
You're a real sweet boy.
Hi, Mr. Holloway.
Hi, Mr. Claw.
Well, here are the papers,
right from the lawyer.
Oh, I see, everything
nice and legal, huh?
"Henceforth this joint is ours."
You needed a lawyer for that?
Sure, he put in
the "henceforth."
Well, guys, I don't want
to be a party pooper,
but I can't sign that.
Oh, I think our partner
needs a little persuading.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
No, wait, wait. No,
wait a minute, now.
You know, I didn't
tell you this before,
but I already have a partner,
so I guess you boys
can just run along.
Hey, how about some
nice burgers to go, okay?
What is this, a double cross?
Oh, no, no, no, I
wouldn't double-cross you.
No, it's my partner, Mr. Big.
Mr. Big.
Mr. Big?
What is it, a candy bar?
No. He's the leader of a gang.
The meanest, toughest
gang in Milwaukee.
And I'll tell you
guys something.
He wouldn't like the idea of
you guys hanging around here.
Oh, Mr. Big is tough, huh?
Oh... tough, tough.
Claw...
show him tough.
Ah, gee, I just filled that.
Don't nobody move.
Right, Scarface?
Scarface?
I surrender.
Won't you put your hands down?
Come on.
Who are these punks?
Oh, these guys aren't punks.
They're part of Mr. Big's gang.
You see that guy right there?
That's Scarface Malph.
He don't have no scar.
Yeah, how about that?
Oh, w-well, you see,
m-my skin's cleared up a lot.
I cut out sweets.
Yeah, and this guy...
The Undertaker.
Yeah.
Simple pine box, medium.
I've had enough of this... Claw.
Claw!
Freeze!
I don't want no muscles moved.
No muscles moved
until Mr. Big gets here,
gets here, gets here, gets here.
You're bluffing.
There's no Mr. Big.
No Mr. Big?
Mr. Big.
You lose, bullet brain.
I'm Mr. Big.
What kind of a name is Mr. Big?
- Polish.
- German. -Russian.
Hey, Al, what are these
ants doing in my place, huh?
They want to take over Arnold's.
They want to
cut in on your turf.
Is that so?
Psycho Louis,
tell them how I feel
about that particular situation.
Mr. Big don't like
no uninvited guests
in his joint, in his
joint, in his joint.
So you guys better
cut out before we cut in.
Before we cut in.
See? You get it?
Uh, I think they got it, Louis.
Cut, cut cut!
Slice, slice, slice!
I'm gonna make a jigsaw
puzzle out of the bunch of youse,
the bunch of youse,
the bunch of youse.
It's all right, Psycho.
- Take it easy. Yeah.
- You can play later, Louie.
I want to eat their watches.
I want to eat your watches.
He eats watches?
Oh, yeah. Yeah, he starts at
the fingers and eats his way up.
Yeah. Unless you're
wearing a pocket watch.
Then... I don't even
want to talk about it.
Now that you've met my family,
why don't you get out of
here while you're still able?
Yeah, there's a bus
leaving in five minutes.
Be under it.
I like it here, Mr. Small.
Mr. Small?
Oh, let me convince him.
I want to convince him.
Cut, cut, slice, slice.
Oh, that was good.
Pass it on.
Pass it on.
Pass it on.
Pass it on.
Ooh, ooh! No! I
didn't mean that!
That was from them,
not-not from me.
Didn't you guys ever play
that game, "Pass It On"?
Nobody ever did
that to me before.
These guys are tough. Come on.
They're leaving.
I don't think so.
Get 'em, boys.
Look out! Look out!
I got you, Claw!
Hold it.
I got you! Take that!
Take that!
Oh.
I'm sorry.
Sit down. Get down.
That's just a little
game we play
before we get
started, all right?
Now, it's just me and
you, Mr. "Hallway."
No, it isn't.
Claw does my dirty work.
Is that so?
Show him, Claw.
Uh-oh.
Look what he did.
He busted my claw.
I got no claw.
What are they gonna call me now?
Lefty. Get out of the way.
Your turn. Let's go.
No, no, no, it's your turf.
Come on, let's get out of here.
There they are. There they are.
- I told you... right here.
- We did it.
Wait, we're just trying... we
were going to buy the place.
- Richard!
- Is everyone all right?
- Oh, Richard.
- You all right?
I'm fine! I'm fine,
I'm fine, I'm fine!
I'm telling you, I'm fine!
- I'll be okay!
- Oh!
Oh, my.
Somebody must have
hit him in the head.
Nobody him me
in the head. No, no.
We did the hitting
and the cutting
and the slicing, and, boy...
We did real well.
Oh, boys,
these-these suits
and these hats.
Well, it's just...
it's just a wonder
that you didn't get hurt.
Hey, Mrs. C., we had
everything under control.
Oh, Mrs. C., I wish you
could have seen me.
I slapped that head
guy right in the face.
Well, you still should
have gone to the police first.
We couldn't. They
didn't break any laws.
Yeah, but if you had gone,
you would have found out
that they were wanted
in three other states.
I slapped a tri-state hood?
I must have been delirious.
I still think it was wrong
to take the law in
your own hands.
Please, Howard.
I mean, the boys did it for me.
When I first took over
Arnold's and I met all you people
for the first time, I
said to myself, I said,
"Al, these are nice people.
"These are good people.
"These are honest people.
"These are people who care.
These are people who..."
He's so sensitive.
Well, I'm just
glad this is all over.
And, Richard, I want you
to take off that
horrible mustache.
Ah, Mom, can't I
keep the mustache?
I mean, I think it really
gives me a lot of...
Pain.
Oh, that gave me a lot of pain.
♪ These happy days are
yours and mine, Happy Days! ♪
♪ Good-bye, gray
sky, hello, blue ♪
♪ There's nothing can
hold me when I hold you ♪
♪ It feels so right,
it can't be wrong ♪
♪ Rockin' and
rollin' all week long ♪
♪ These days are ours ♪
- ♪ Happy and free ♪
- ♪ Oh, happy days ♪
♪ These days are ours ♪
- ♪ Share them with me ♪
- ♪ Oh, baby ♪
♪ These happy days
are yours and mine ♪
♪ These happy days are
yours and mine, Happy Days! ♪
♪ Tuesday, Wednesday,
happy days ♪
♪ Thursday, Friday, happy days ♪
♪ The weekend
comes, my cycle hums ♪
♪ Ready to race to you ♪
♪ These days are ours ♪
- ♪ Happy and free ♪
- ♪ Oh, happy days ♪
♪ These days are ours ♪
- ♪ Share them with me ♪
- ♪ Oh, baby ♪
♪ Good-bye, gray
sky, hello, blue ♪
♪ There's nothing can
hold me when I hold you ♪
♪ It feels so right
it can't be wrong ♪
♪ Rocking and
rolling all week long ♪
♪ Sunday, Monday, happy days ♪
♪ Tuesday, Wednesday,
happy days ♪
♪ Thursday, Friday, happy days ♪
♪ Saturday, what a day ♪
♪ Groovin' all week with you ♪
♪ These days are ours ♪
- ♪ Share them with me ♪
- ♪ Oh, happy days ♪
♪ These days are ours ♪
- ♪ Happy and free ♪
- ♪ Oh, baby ♪
♪ These happy days
are yours and mine ♪
♪ These happy days are yours ♪
♪ And mine, Happy Days! ♪
Happy Days was filmed in
front of a studio audience.
- ♪ Well, you are the one ♪
- ♪ You're the one ♪
- ♪ That makes me glad ♪
- ♪ You're the one... ♪
- ♪ Any other one ♪
- ♪ You're the one ♪
- ♪ Makes me sad ♪
- ♪ You're the one... ♪
- ♪ When someday ♪
- ♪ You're the one ♪
- ♪ You want me ♪
- ♪ You're the one... ♪
♪ Well, I'll be
there, wait and see ♪
♪ Maybe, baby, I'll have you ♪
♪ Maybe, baby, you'll be true ♪
♪ Maybe, baby, I'll
have you for me ♪
♪ I'll have you for me ♪
♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪
- ♪ Well, you are the one ♪
- ♪ You're the one ♪
- ♪ That makes me glad ♪
- ♪ You're the one... ♪
- ♪ Any other one ♪
- ♪ You're the one ♪
- ♪ Makes me sad ♪
- ♪ You're the one... ♪
- ♪ When someday ♪
- ♪ You're the one ♪
- ♪ You want me ♪
- ♪ You're the one... ♪
♪ Well, I'll be
there, wait and see ♪
♪ Maybe, baby, I'll have you ♪
♪ Maybe, baby, you'll be true ♪
♪ Maybe, baby, I'll
have you for me ♪
♪ I'll have you for me ♪
♪ Maybe, baby, I'll
have you for me ♪
♪ I'll have you for me. ♪
Thank you.
Potsie Weber.
Thank you very much.
Well, that does it for
this set. Thank you, folks.
Rich, how come Al's got
us playing in the afternoon?
Oh, I don't know.
He's, uh, got some
kind of meeting going
with somebody
there in the kitchen.
Must be somebody
he's trying to impress.
Well, it can't be
the health inspector.
The place is still open.
Ah, don't you worry
about a thing, A.D.
A.D.?
Al Delvecchio.
Oh. A.D. Right.
With your personality
and our capital,
this place should
really take off.
Oh, I don't do too bad
right now, Mr. Holloway.
Sometimes I go 50, 60
customers in one night,
and some of them even order.
You've got to think big, A.D.
I mean, a chain of
Arnold's from coast to coast,
your own penthouse,
your own yacht,
your own limousine.
Well, you better
skip the limousine
'cause I get carsick
when I ride in the backseat.
Hey, could I ride up in
front with the chauffeur?
Sure, you got it, champ.
Right.
Hey, I want you
to meet the band.
Come here, Mr. Holloway.
- Mr. Holloway...
- Oh. How do you do?
- Meet the, uh... the, uh... the...
- Hi.
They don't have a name yet.
Oh. Promote the place.
Uh, let's call
them the Al Tones.
The Al Tones!
Or something else.
Well, these are my booths.
These are my customers,
happy customers.
- That's my jukebox.
- Oh.
And that's the girls'
room. We could skip that.
This is the men's room.
All right. Come on, open up.
Let me in.
Not by a hair on
my chinny chin chin.
Hey, Al.
What's going on here,
Al? I'm on the phone.
Overseas. Rome, Al, Rome.
- Huh?
- Sorry. Sorry.
Hey, look, look, look,
let me ask you a question.
- You know Italian, right?
- Oh, yeah.
What's the word for, uh...
Oh... I never
learned those words.
I never got a
chance to use them.
I'll use the
international language
of heavy breathing.
Oh, uh, we're very
continental here.
Oh, I can see that.
Well, listen, I've seen enough.
I'll come back tonight
and close the deal, huh?
Here's to a long and
prosperous partnership, A.D.
Yeah, well, I'm
looking forward to it.
Al, get a repairman.
I just melted the wire.
Hey, Fonz, Fonz,
we're dying to hear
about this
long-distance phone call.
Yeah, how'd you make
out with the Roman beauty?
Need you ask?
Fonz, well, what is this?
Yesterday Rio de
Janeiro, today Rome.
What's going on?
Well, I got this plan, see.
I-I want to get my own page
in the Magilla Book of Records.
That's right.
"Fonzarelli: Around
the World in 80 Chicks."
Hey. Hey, Al? Al?
You want something?
Big biz. Big biz. Big biz.
Big, big, big biz.
Yeah, Al. Uh, how'd
your meeting go?
Well, I don't want
to say it was good,
and I don't want
to say it was bad,
but you're now looking at
the next Howard Johnson.
Hey, uh, Mr. Johnson,
you want to come
out of the clouds
here and translate?
Oh, yeah, Fonz. You
know the guy who just left?
Yeah.
Well, he's with a very
big investment company,
and he wants to
invest in Arnold's.
He says I got a very
big potential here.
And he told me to
name my own price.
Hey, Al.
You'll need a commercial.
- Good idea.
- Hi, there.
Say, after a hard
day at the office,
there is nothing like
an Arnold Burger.
Ooh, I ate it!
Al, it must have been
pretty exciting, huh?
- I mean, the negotiations.
- Oh, yeah.
Your lawyer on this side,
their lawyer on that side.
Your accountant on this side,
- their accountant on that side.
- No.
- Your side of the
table - No, no...
- versus their side of the table.
- Rich, Rich.
- What?
- No.
No accountants, no lawyers.
- No?
- I mean, they're very expensive.
But I know the guy
to go get advice from.
Oh, good.
Hey, now, I don't want you
guys to worry about a thing
because I'm gonna take
you all to the top with me.
That's nice, Al.
Hello.
Yeah. Uh-huh.
Fonz, it's for you.
Go get her, Fonz.
It's the overseas operator.
Yo.
What?
All right, all right, all right.
Calm down. Calm down.
Here we go.
Marion?
- What is it, Howard?
- Richie, Joanie,
get down here quick.
What is it, Howard?
I'm busy. What...
- I bought something.
- Ooh!
- What?
- A color TV with a remote control!
No, it's not a color TV.
It's outside.
- Outside!
- Outside!
- You traded in the DeSoto!
- A car?
- Look. -JOANIE: A new car?
- Where is it?
Wh-Wh-Where...? It's stolen.
Oh...
No, Marion. Right here.
It's a new item for the store.
Look at this.
Oh, that's terrific.
Got to get back upstairs.
Jenny's in the middle
of a juicy piece of gossip.
Something about the
football coach wearing a dress.
Coach Bilford?
I got a date.
Well, Howard, I
have to fix dinner.
Well, wait a minute,
wait a minute.
A personalized doormat.
I think it's gonna
be a big-selling item.
Oh, but, Howard, how
many Cunninghams
are there in Milwaukee?
Marion, you can put
anything you want on it.
Oh.
How about "welcome"?
Just answer the door, will you?
Yeah, I got it.
- Hi, hi, hi, hi, hi.
- Hey, Al.
Something very important
came up, and I need your advice.
Well, Al, as I told
you at Arnold's, I feel
- that what you really need...
- Rich, Rich,
- I was talking to your father.
- Oh.
Of course, Al. Come on in.
What is it?
Well, Howard, a man
came to see me from the, uh,
Lake Michigan
Investment Company,
and he wants to
invest in Arnold's,
and he wants to expand it.
Oh, isn't that
wonderful, Alfred?
It sounds very
exciting, Al, but...
well, maybe you
shouldn't rush into this.
What do you know about Lake
Michigan Investments, huh?
Well, nothing, but the
guy's a very nice person.
Oh, sure, real nice.
Wants to call our
band the Al Tones.
Well, he may be
nice, but I still think
you ought to check it out.
To begin with, you ought to have
your accountant go
over their books, and...
and you'll need a
lawyer for the contracts.
You hear that, Al?
Same advice I gave you.
I have a nephew
who's almost a lawyer.
He sent in this matchbook
cover, and six years later...
Marion!
He needs a lawyer now.
Well, that's true.
Good luck, Al.
Thank you, Marion.
You know, Al, a franchise...
That's a lot of responsibility.
You sure you want
to get into this?
Well, Howard, every
man has his dream.
And you know what my dream is?
When I close my eyes,
I see myself walking
along this road
and I'm planting Arnold
Burgers as I go along.
Just like... Johnny Appleseed.
And sprouting up behind
me are thousands of drive-ins
with people of every
race, color and creed
coming up to me and saying,
"Hold the onions, Al."
Oh, that's a lovely dream.
Well, I got to go.
Wait a minute, Al.
How would you
like one of these, uh,
personalized doormats, huh?
Oh, thanks, Howard.
Two ice-cold glasses of milk.
That's the way to start
off a business meeting.
You got to keep a clear head.
A.D.
Oh, Mr. Holloway, come on in.
Come in.
Hey, have a nice glass of milk.
No, no, thanks.
I never touch it.
You got anything stronger?
Well, I could make
you a cherry fizz.
That strong, huh?
Well, maybe you
better forget it.
Partners, huh, A.D.?
Yeah, partners.
Well, not yet.
You see, before I make
a big decision like that,
I think we ought to
consult with an accountant,
- a lawyer.
- A lawyer?
Yeah, because a partnership,
there's a lot of things
to be considered.
I totally agree with you.
And here's something you
should consider right away.
Boys!
That's Leo...
Oh, hi, Leo.
And that's the Claw.
Claw?
You want lawyers, huh?
Show 'em, Claw.
The Claw.
No lawyers.
Well, I guess
this is it, old girl.
The end of the road.
It was fate that brought
us to this moment.
Fate.
And a guy with an iron hand.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Al. What is this?
What the heck is this?
What are these? What
the heck are these?
Rich, I'm taking a little trip.
A little trip, huh?
"Closed, for sale by owner."
That's no little trip.
Okay, I'm taking a big trip.
What is going on, Al? Come on.
- Rich, okay, it's good news!
- Yeah?
I sold out to Mr. Holloway.
Lots of bucks.
Boy, I'm gonna
make it on easy street.
Oh.
Oh, Rich, I can't lie
to you. He's a crook.
He's got a gang, and one
of them's got an iron hand.
Oh, they-they want
to take over Arnold's,
and-and they want
to make Arnold's
- into a bookie joint.
- What?
Well, I-I got to go, Rich.
I'll write you a letter
explaining everything later.
Hey, wait. Why don't
you explain it to me now?
Try and tell me how running
away is gonna help anything.
Rich, don't you see?
Selling the building's the only
way I'm going to stop them.
They're crooks.
Hey, Al.
All right, look. Don't
you sign nothing.
They're crooks.
- Fonz.
- Yeah.
You knew without me telling you?
That happens. It
happens sometimes.
Let me tell you something.
Nobody's gonna push one
of my friends out of town.
You understand that?
You just stay right here.
I'll be back.
- Fonz, Fonz.
- Yeah.
Mr. Holloway's gonna
come back in one hour.
Hey, that's enough
time. Don't worry about it.
Richie, let's get
the gang together.
- Right now.
- Right.
Get the gang together, Fonz.
Fonz, we don't have a gang.
We don't have a gang.
Fonzie and I called this meeting
for one very big reason.
These thugs are
trying to push around Al.
We can't let that happen.
Got any more soda, Rich?
No, we don't have any more soda.
Do you have any ideas?
- I got it...
- Ah, good.
- I got it.
- He's got it.
We send them a
threatening Candygram.
I'm going to pretend I
didn't hear that, Malph.
Hear what, Fonz?
I got it... we'll burn 'em out.
I definitely didn't hear that.
We'll burn them out.
I think we're
overlooking something.
I mean, why don't we
just call the police, huh?
- That's a great idea, Rich.
- Yeah.
What are you going to tell 'em?
Three guys want
to buy into Al's?
Well... well,
yeah, you're right.
They haven't done anything.
Okay, okay, no police.
But we have got to do something.
Hey, I'm doing it.
I'm keeping my ear
to the street, huh?
Bet you get kicked
in the head a lot.
All right, now, here's the info.
This gang was
kicked out of Chicago
for messing with the real Mob.
All right, then he tried to move
into Cleveland,
you know, lay low.
He was kicked out by the PTA.
Well, yeah, that was then.
Now he's got this new thug.
Guy they call the Claw.
Claw?
Yeah, man has an iron hand.
All right, now, look.
I know exactly what
these thugs are.
Bullies... that's it.
Fonz, you're going to
pound these guys, right?
I never use violence
unless I have to.
All right, Rich,
now, you tell me...
What are we supposed
to do against these guys?
Hey, I'm telling you, I
know exactly what to do.
You stand up to a
bully, he backs down.
You know, that's what
my dad always says.
Only way to deal with a
bully... Stand right up to him.
My dad told me to run.
My dad told me to stand
there and take it like a man.
Well, I think Fonzie's
got the right idea here.
I mean, if we can just
make a show of force,
those guys will back down.
Oh, yeah? That's
what Custer said.
Hey, I promise you, Ralphie,
nothing is going
to happen to you.
Oh, this is great. We'll
back those creeps down.
No way.
You're too young
for this kind of stuff.
Oh, I'm too young
for all the neat things.
Oh, you know, actually I'm
a lot younger than I let on.
Ralphie, I promised you
nothing is going to happen to you.
Fine. It's all settled.
We'll meet at Arnold's at 10:00.
- Great. Oh.
- Oh!
And you do not tell our parents.
Oh, what do you
think I am, a squealer?
No comment.
All right, any questions?
Should we eat first?
Sit down. Come on, let's
have... let's have this out.
- All right.
- Okay, uh, first thing we need to do
- is talk to Al, right?
- That's right. -Right.
And then, look, we tell
Al to move right in, okay?
Here's what we're going to do.
Ah, this is crazy.
Fonzie's plan is
never gonna work.
I'm getting out of here.
You look like you're in a hurry.
You're not trying to run
out on us, are you, partner?
No, I was just gonna
go outside and check
to make sure you got
a good parking space.
Ain't that nice?
- You're a good boy.
- Yeah.
Hi, Leo.
You're a real sweet boy.
Hi, Mr. Holloway.
Hi, Mr. Claw.
Well, here are the papers,
right from the lawyer.
Oh, I see, everything
nice and legal, huh?
"Henceforth this joint is ours."
You needed a lawyer for that?
Sure, he put in
the "henceforth."
Well, guys, I don't want
to be a party pooper,
but I can't sign that.
Oh, I think our partner
needs a little persuading.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
No, wait, wait. No,
wait a minute, now.
You know, I didn't
tell you this before,
but I already have a partner,
so I guess you boys
can just run along.
Hey, how about some
nice burgers to go, okay?
What is this, a double cross?
Oh, no, no, no, I
wouldn't double-cross you.
No, it's my partner, Mr. Big.
Mr. Big.
Mr. Big?
What is it, a candy bar?
No. He's the leader of a gang.
The meanest, toughest
gang in Milwaukee.
And I'll tell you
guys something.
He wouldn't like the idea of
you guys hanging around here.
Oh, Mr. Big is tough, huh?
Oh... tough, tough.
Claw...
show him tough.
Ah, gee, I just filled that.
Don't nobody move.
Right, Scarface?
Scarface?
I surrender.
Won't you put your hands down?
Come on.
Who are these punks?
Oh, these guys aren't punks.
They're part of Mr. Big's gang.
You see that guy right there?
That's Scarface Malph.
He don't have no scar.
Yeah, how about that?
Oh, w-well, you see,
m-my skin's cleared up a lot.
I cut out sweets.
Yeah, and this guy...
The Undertaker.
Yeah.
Simple pine box, medium.
I've had enough of this... Claw.
Claw!
Freeze!
I don't want no muscles moved.
No muscles moved
until Mr. Big gets here,
gets here, gets here, gets here.
You're bluffing.
There's no Mr. Big.
No Mr. Big?
Mr. Big.
You lose, bullet brain.
I'm Mr. Big.
What kind of a name is Mr. Big?
- Polish.
- German. -Russian.
Hey, Al, what are these
ants doing in my place, huh?
They want to take over Arnold's.
They want to
cut in on your turf.
Is that so?
Psycho Louis,
tell them how I feel
about that particular situation.
Mr. Big don't like
no uninvited guests
in his joint, in his
joint, in his joint.
So you guys better
cut out before we cut in.
Before we cut in.
See? You get it?
Uh, I think they got it, Louis.
Cut, cut cut!
Slice, slice, slice!
I'm gonna make a jigsaw
puzzle out of the bunch of youse,
the bunch of youse,
the bunch of youse.
It's all right, Psycho.
- Take it easy. Yeah.
- You can play later, Louie.
I want to eat their watches.
I want to eat your watches.
He eats watches?
Oh, yeah. Yeah, he starts at
the fingers and eats his way up.
Yeah. Unless you're
wearing a pocket watch.
Then... I don't even
want to talk about it.
Now that you've met my family,
why don't you get out of
here while you're still able?
Yeah, there's a bus
leaving in five minutes.
Be under it.
I like it here, Mr. Small.
Mr. Small?
Oh, let me convince him.
I want to convince him.
Cut, cut, slice, slice.
Oh, that was good.
Pass it on.
Pass it on.
Pass it on.
Pass it on.
Ooh, ooh! No! I
didn't mean that!
That was from them,
not-not from me.
Didn't you guys ever play
that game, "Pass It On"?
Nobody ever did
that to me before.
These guys are tough. Come on.
They're leaving.
I don't think so.
Get 'em, boys.
Look out! Look out!
I got you, Claw!
Hold it.
I got you! Take that!
Take that!
Oh.
I'm sorry.
Sit down. Get down.
That's just a little
game we play
before we get
started, all right?
Now, it's just me and
you, Mr. "Hallway."
No, it isn't.
Claw does my dirty work.
Is that so?
Show him, Claw.
Uh-oh.
Look what he did.
He busted my claw.
I got no claw.
What are they gonna call me now?
Lefty. Get out of the way.
Your turn. Let's go.
No, no, no, it's your turf.
Come on, let's get out of here.
There they are. There they are.
- I told you... right here.
- We did it.
Wait, we're just trying... we
were going to buy the place.
- Richard!
- Is everyone all right?
- Oh, Richard.
- You all right?
I'm fine! I'm fine,
I'm fine, I'm fine!
I'm telling you, I'm fine!
- I'll be okay!
- Oh!
Oh, my.
Somebody must have
hit him in the head.
Nobody him me
in the head. No, no.
We did the hitting
and the cutting
and the slicing, and, boy...
We did real well.
Oh, boys,
these-these suits
and these hats.
Well, it's just...
it's just a wonder
that you didn't get hurt.
Hey, Mrs. C., we had
everything under control.
Oh, Mrs. C., I wish you
could have seen me.
I slapped that head
guy right in the face.
Well, you still should
have gone to the police first.
We couldn't. They
didn't break any laws.
Yeah, but if you had gone,
you would have found out
that they were wanted
in three other states.
I slapped a tri-state hood?
I must have been delirious.
I still think it was wrong
to take the law in
your own hands.
Please, Howard.
I mean, the boys did it for me.
When I first took over
Arnold's and I met all you people
for the first time, I
said to myself, I said,
"Al, these are nice people.
"These are good people.
"These are honest people.
"These are people who care.
These are people who..."
He's so sensitive.
Well, I'm just
glad this is all over.
And, Richard, I want you
to take off that
horrible mustache.
Ah, Mom, can't I
keep the mustache?
I mean, I think it really
gives me a lot of...
Pain.
Oh, that gave me a lot of pain.
♪ These happy days are
yours and mine, Happy Days! ♪
♪ Good-bye, gray
sky, hello, blue ♪
♪ There's nothing can
hold me when I hold you ♪
♪ It feels so right,
it can't be wrong ♪
♪ Rockin' and
rollin' all week long ♪
♪ These days are ours ♪
- ♪ Happy and free ♪
- ♪ Oh, happy days ♪
♪ These days are ours ♪
- ♪ Share them with me ♪
- ♪ Oh, baby ♪
♪ These happy days
are yours and mine ♪
♪ These happy days are
yours and mine, Happy Days! ♪