Gunsmoke (1955–1975): Season 5, Episode 36 - The Bobsy Twins - full transcript

Two brothers have decided that it is their mission to rid the West of Indians.

♪♪ [theme]

starring James
Arness as Matt Dillon.

Harvey.



What you want, Merle?

Why, what I want to know is...

where this here Dodge City...

you've been talking about is.

I don't know, but it's a
fair piece yet, I reckon.

[panting]

If you ask me, it's
about... [panting]

about as far as a man can
get without starting back again.

Yeah, I reckon you can say that.

- Merle.
- Huh?

Are you tired?

No.



No, I ain't... I ain't tired.

It's all this heat.

Ain't this the gol-dang'dest
weather you ever did see?

Oh, I don't know.

I've seen gol-dang-er.

H-Hey.

That's a bunch of
people cooking food.

Oh, Merle, won't you
ever learn nothing?

That ain't a bunch of people?

Well, they're
cooking food anyway.

And we ain't et for two days.

- Say.
- Huh?

Maybe they'll throw
us a little something.

- Huh.
- Let's go see.

Huh.

Hello, people.

Well, hello. Where
are you two headed for?

Dodge City.

We don't know w...
Uh, we can't find it.

Well, I ain't never been there.

We're on our way to California.

This here's my wife Lavinia.

How do you do?

W-What's that food
you got cooking?

It's just beans and potatoes,
and not much of that.

I'm just sorry we
can't offer you none.

I wouldn't mind potatoes
and beans, mister.

I ain't et for two days.

My brother here
ain't et, either.

Well, now, I sure am sorry,

but as I told you, there's only enough
for the woman and myself as it is.

Well, we just kind of figured
on something to eat, mister.

And it's... it's Sunday, too.

Huh?

Here, I'll give them
a little dab of it.

No, I told you before,
there isn't enough.

Joe, maybe I'd better
give them something.

I said no.

- Merle.
- What, Harvey?

He don't act like he wants
to give us nothing to eat.

And that's the
pure truth, mister.

Now why don't you
two get out of here?

Joe, no.

You better be careful
of that pistol, mister.

Don't you know it ain't fittin' to
be handlin' weapons on Sunday?

Just get out of here.

Oh, shucks, mister.

Merle.

Ohh!

[gasp]

Joe!

Joe!

[sobbing]

Uh, now why's she got
to carry on in that way?

Oh, Joe.

Ma'am.

You shot my husband. Why?

I reckon I did, ma'am.

But why? Why?

All we wanted was your dinner,

and he was gonna shoot us.

Ohh...

[wailing]

Merle.

[loud wailing]

Make her shut
up. I can't stand it.

All rightie.

I'll try.

Now, now, lady,

w-we're kind of sorry
the way things turned out.

[gasp]

Kind of sorry?

Now, lady, ah, we... we feel bad
to see you carrying on like that.

Kind of sorry?

Did you hear that, Joe?

They're kind of sorry.

[horse nickers]

They're sorry you're dead, Joe.

Now, lady... [laughing]

That's funny, isn't it, Joe?

Now cut it out!

Cut it out, you hear me?

Now you quit carrying
on that way, you hear?

Sorry.

Sorry...

[laughing]

Where at she going, Merle?

I don't know.

Well, one thing I can't
stand is a noisy woman.

Yeah, me, too.

Uh, Harvey, how is this?

Oh, here.

Mm. That's not bad.

You know, Merle,

we're gonna have to do
something about them horses.

Now, Harvey,

Pa never... never did hold
with stealing, remember?

Oh, I wasn't going to steal
them, Merle. You know that.

We can't keep them poor
critters tied up like that.

That'd be downright cruel.

Huh.

I... I... I'll turn
them loose, then.

I reckon these people won't
have any use for them anymore.

No, reckon not.

Here.

Look there.

Dead?

Yeah.

She's been dead
for a couple of days.

I wonder how it
could have happened.

I don't know. There don't seem to
be any marks on her or anything.

Looks to me like she just
died of thirst or something.

Thirst? Oh, that's a...
That's a hard way to go.

Yeah. I wonder what she's
doing out here anyway.

Maybe we could put up some
kind of a little marker for her.

All right.

Then we'll scout around and see if
we can find out where she came from.

Poor woman. I'll bet you
somebody's out looking for her.

Shot.

You think that Indians
might have done it, Mr. Dillon?

No. No, they'd have
scalped him, Chester.

Yeah.

My golly, there was a
woman here, Mr. Dillon.

Yeah. That woman
we buried, I expect.

Yeah. I bet when the trouble
started, she... she run for help.

Yeah.

Yeah, it looks that
way, doesn't it?

I don't understand
it, though, Mr. Dillon.

You... You say that
Indians didn't do it,

and whoever done it didn't take nothing.
There wasn't nothing here to steal.

I just don't know why
they'd do a thing like this.

Yeah. It doesn't make sense.

No, none at all.

Well, come on, let's see if we can
find something to dig a grave with.

Took you long enough.

I got plenty. I didn't want to go
back out in the dark again, Harvey.

Don't you like this camp, Merle?

Eh, tolerable for a camp.

[Man] Hello!

What's that?

Howdy. Mind if I light a spell?

My name's Bud Grant.

Our names is Finney.

I'm Harvey, and
this here's Merle.

- We're brothers.
- Yeah, I see.

Where are you
heading for, cowboy?

Dodge.

Gol-dang it, we've been looking
for that place for days and days.

Where is Dodge anyway?

Well, it's just
about a hundred...

Never mind where's Dodge.

Have you saw any Indians?

Indians?

Any kind of Indians.
We ain't particular.

Indians are all alike to us.

What are you talking about?

Oh, you're as dumb as
everybody else, Grant.

Never mind him, Harvey.

Nobody around here knows anything
about where there are any Indians.

We're going to
have to ask in Dodge.

Well, I don't understand.
What do you want Indians for?

Never mind what
we want Indians for.

You hungry?

Uh, yeah, yeah. I reckon
I could eat something.

Why, I... I killed an
antelope this afternoon

that's been cooking
all day. It's about ready.

Well, that's mighty
friendly of you.

Sit down, Grant.

I'd better take care
of my horse first.

Well, I'll stake
him out for you.

You've been riding all
day... All tuckered out.

Thanks.

Come on. Set.

This being Sunday, we ain't
done a thing hardly all day, Grant.

Say, that's right. I plum
forgot it was Sunday.

I reckon a man ought to
rest one day a week, huh?

Yes, sir. Our pa always said so.

He must have been a
right religious man, your pa.

Sunday, Pa was always
sleeping off a drunk.

He didn't hold with killing
and fighting on the Sabbath.

Hmm. Well, last Sunday, somebody
sure must have been drunk or something.

Why?

A man got shot a
hundred miles east of here.

Indians! Doggone it, why didn't you
tell us there was Indians around here?

No, it wasn't Indians.

Fact is, I heard it couldn't
have been Indians at all.

Are you saying it was
we-uns that done it?

Me and Merle?

Now look here, man, I
didn't say nothing like that.

Well, it was.

What did you say?

I had to shoot that man.

Well, you're crazy.

You knowed it all
the time, didn't you?

That's why you rode in here.

No.

No, it ain't true.

I didn't know a thing.

That ain't true. No.

Dad-burn it, stop
jumping around.

[gunshot]

What happened, Harvey?

I shot him.

Oh.

I had to, Merle.

He knowed about us
killing that fella last week,

and he was talking pretty loose.

I wish you'd told me.

Now I got his horse all
staked out and everything.

Well, go turn him loose.

Supper's pert near ready.

Okay.

Uh, but don't you
eat till I get back.

Oh, now you know I got
better manners than that, Merle.

Yeah.

♪ You can live all over Kansas ♪

♪ In every Kansas town ♪

♪ You'll not find another pair ♪

♪ Like your eyes of brown ♪

[humming]

♪ Them big eyes ♪

♪ You got them big eyes ♪

Well, you making
any money out there?

Uh... Oh, well, I just
thought I'd come out

and have a little cup of coffee.

I'll tell you, those
stalls out back there

look like they've been used
for a stable or something.

Y... Well, uh, well, they're
good enough for any customers

that we might have
coming through here.

[hoofbeats]

Well, lookie there, would you?

What's the matter?

Well, there's a fella riding
up here leading a horse.

Looks like he's got
a dead man tied to it.

Lookie.

Brought you a present, Marshal.

- So I see.
- He got shot.

You do it?

Now that isn't likely, is it?

I found him in a grove
about 40 miles east of here

near Salt Springs.

He was all alone there.

Got any idea who he is?

No, I... I never
seen him before.

That's his horse. It ain't
even branded, though.

- Chester.
- Huh?

Can you, uh, take care of him?

Oh. Yeah, sure.

Where are you from, cowboy?

Oh, I've been riding for Emmet
Bowers the past three months.

My name's Taylor. You can
ask Mr. Bowers about me.

No need to. I believe you.

Thanks for bringing him in.

Well, I figured it
was kind of my duty.

Besides, I'd hope someone
would do the same for me.

Yeah, that's the second man that's
been murdered out that way lately.

Yeah, I heard.

Maybe you ought to be out
there looking around, Marshal.

Looking for what?

Well, I don't know.

Neither do I.

- Here you are.
- Thanks, Kitty.

You look tired.

Well, I am. Been out
on the trail for two days.

Did you find out anything
more about those killings?

Not a thing. Two men
and a woman dead

and no reason for it at
all that I can figure out.

Mister.

- Are you the marshal?
- That's right.

We want to talk to you.

- Sit down, Merle.
- Sure.

My name's Harvey Finney.

My brother here's
name is Merle Finney.

Mm-hmm. What can I do for you?

Nobody in this town
knows nothing, Marshal.

I bet you could
teach them a lot.

I sure ain't never
gonna get married.

Well, I don't think you have
to worry about that too much.

What do you men want anyway?

[Harvey] Indians.

We can't find no Indian
nowhere, Marshal.

Nowheres at all.

What are you going
to do, join them?

No, We ain't going to join them.

We're going to kill them.

We come west to kill Indians.

You got to help us
find them, Marshal.

Nobody else will.

I'm kind of curious.

Why do you two want to
go Indian hunting anyhow?

[Merle] We read it in a book.

Now, Merle, that's a lie.

You know Pa never
did hold with lying.

Well, w-we can't read,

but a fella back home
told us about this book.

Yes, all about the Indians
murdering white men,

scalping them and everything.

I see.

So you decided you're
going to come out here

and do a little Indian
murdering, huh?

Well, now, let me
tell you something.

If you think that you're
going to come out here

and stir up an Indian
war, you're crazy.

I don't know what
your fool idea is,

but I'm telling you right
now to forget about it

an turn around and go on back
home where you came from.

Oh, come on, Merle.
He's as dumb as the rest.

I told you he couldn't help
us none, Harvey. I told you.

You'd think maybe the
marshal would have some sense.

All right. Hold on there.

I'll just take those two
rifles while you're in town.

Merle.

No, Harvey.

Here. You'll give
them back to us?

You'll get them back.

Them two old fools.

- Still looking for Indians, huh?
- Yeah.

They bothered everybody
in town about them.

[chuckling]

Say, I got an idea, Les.

Come on.

What are you gonna do?

You'll see.

Hey, mister.

Maybe you don't remember, but
you were talking to me last night

about, uh, Indians.

- Uh...
- You two know something about Indians?

Yep. Why, I plum
forgot yesterday,

but there's an Indian
right here in town.

- How's that?
- Right here in town.

Runs the stable, in fact.

Runs the stable?

Well, I suppose you never knew
Carl Miller was a full-blooded Cherokee.

By golly, I plum forgot.

You say he's a Indian?

Oh, he don't let on, but
it's the truth, so help me.

- Ain't it, Les?
- Oh, he's been hiding it for years.

Dang redskin.

Come on, Merle,
we got work to do.

I'm ready. Gol-dang
it, I'm ready.

Yeah. Come on.

Matt?

Oh, Matt!

Matt!

Oh, wait a minute.
Matt, I'm awful sorry.

I... Well, with my eyes, I
just didn't see you back here.

Boy, there's sure nothing
wrong with your voice.

Well, good heavens, I never
expected to find you back here in jail,

although I grant it's
not too bad an idea.

What did you have to come
around so early for anyway?

Well, don't get nervous about it.
I'm not charging you for the visit.

It's Sunday, you know.

Man's supposed to have
companionship on Sunday

and kind of socialize.

I see. And it was my
luck to draw you, huh?

Well, tsk tsk tsk tsk.

The words of his mouth
were smoother than butter,

but war was in his heart.

Chronicles, huh?

Yeah.

How in thunder
did you know that?

Well, now, you're not
the only civilized man

around this town, you know, Doc.

Well, there's not very many of us
left. Let's go get something to eat.

Mr. Dillon.

- Hi, Doc.
- What's the matter with you?

Well, it's them Finney
brothers, Merle and Harvey.

There's going to be
trouble for sure, Mr. Dillon.

What are they up to?

A couple of darn fools
over at the Long Branch

told them that Carl Miller
was a full-blood Cherokee.

[laughing] He's...
He's a German.

Well, it ain't funny, Doc. They're
just crazy enough to do anything.

Yeah, they are.

Well, we'd better
get over there.

Oh, well, Doc, guess that
breakfast will just have to wait.

Well, shaw.

Get that rope tied, Merle.

Yeah, I'll get it tied,
Harvey. Just be patient.

Won't you men listen?

I swear I'm no Indian.

Oh, shut up. Nobody'd take the
word of a danged redskin anyway.

Oh, you can't do this.
I've got a big family.

Then your family ain't
gonna get no bigger.

You murdering Cherokee.

I'm no Cherokee. I'm German.

It don't make no difference what
tribe, as long as you're an Indian.

Now hush up.

But this is crazy.
You've got it all mixed up.

We're going to shut
you up right now.

Hold it right there.

Merle, it's that dumb marshal.

I knowed he was no good.

Fancy him siding with Indians.

Marshal, do something, please.

He's no more an Indian than you
are. Now get that rope off his neck.

I ain't gonna do it. I'm
gonna push him off.

You'll die if you do.

I told you I was right
about this marshal.

Here he is protecting
a dirty redskin.

- Go ahead, push him off, Harvey.
- All right.

Touch him and I'll kill you.

Uh, he means it, Merle.

Now get that rope off his neck.

All right. All right.

Now just don't get so jumpy.

Next time we'll slit
your throat for you.

You won't do nothing.
I'll kill you on sight.

Yeah, we ain't
through with you yet.

There.

All right. now, Carl,
you climb down first.

You bet I will.

All right, now you two.

It ain't going to be
easy with this shoulder.

Well, then, why
don't you just jump?

Ah, you shut up.

We should... We should never
have given that marshal our guns.

You all right, Carl?

Still a mite shaky.

Chester, why don't you take him
and get him a drink or something?

You betcha. Come on, Carl.

You... You busted
my shoulder, Marshal.

Well, that's too bad.

The doctor will fix
it up for you in jail.

Jail?

Your Indian hunting
days are over.

Well, doggone.

You mean we made
this trip for nothing?

We never killed us
no Indian, Harvey.

- Just a few white people.
- Oh, dern it, Merle.

What did you go
tell him that for?

Oh, I... I wasn't talking to
him. I was talking to you.

Wait a minute.

Did you kill that man out
there in that covered wagon?

Well, if Merle done told
you, it's no use to deny it now.

How about that cowboy?
Was that you, too?

Well, I didn't say that.

Well, it make no
difference now, Merle.

No, it sure doesn't.

You're going to
hang, both of you.

Well, Marshal, I think I'd sooner
not be hung, if I had my sooners.

Wait a minute. Merle, I
know what we done wrong.

What?

We plum forgot as how
it was Sunday both times.

And you know Pa never did
hold with killing on Sunday.

By golly, you're right.

Let's go.