Growing Pains (1985–1992): Season 7, Episode 22 - The Wrath of Con Ed - full transcript

Ben: Looking sharp dad.
Ben: F.Y.I.dad, its popcorn-shrimp night at the sizzler.
Jason: Well thanks but unfortunately three months ago we planned tonight for a special night of theater, dinner, dancing, and the works.
Ben: The works?Ah, you mean sex.
Jason: Ben I know your 15 but not everything you hear is a euphemism for sex.
Ben: Well I guess not.I mean you sure don't seem very excited about taking mom out.
Jason: Well it's just that I have a speech to prepare for Monday, I've got the clinic budgets due next week,
and I'd cancel tonight but it would break your mother's heart.Oh, you look fabulous.
Maggie: Well I have been looking forward to this for months.
Jason: I'll pull the car around.I'm thrilled!
Maggie: Oh, me too!Ah...I'd do anything to get out of this.
Ben: Huh?
Maggie: Oh, I've got a column due next week, and I'm in the middle of researching another.I need a night out like I need a paper cut.
Ben: Gee mom, you know, dad sure would be disappointed if you didn't go.
Maggie: Oh, I know, but...
Carol: Mom is it ok if I borrowed your perfume?
Maggie: Oh, of course honey!Anything you want, I'm just so glad to have you home.
Carol: Mom, take it easy your giving me hug burns.
Ben: Man, dad can't wait to get you alone mom.
Maggie: I'll get my coat.The sooner I get this started the sooner I get it over with.
Carol: Marriage is never going to do that to me.Oh Kate, thanks for agreeing to have diner with Dwight and me.
I mean I really want Mike and Dwight to be friends but I know you had to talk Mike into coming tonight.
Kate: Don't be silly, Mike is really looking forward to this.He is so excited.
Mike: I've got a tape worm.
Carol: Poor baby!Where does it hurt?
Mike: Ah, well, well right there.
Carol: You're going, and if you hurt Dwight's feelings you'll wish you had a tape worm.
Mike: Oh my!A trip to London really mellowed her out.
Kate: A tape worm?
Mike: Well I was going to go with rickets, but I figured she wouldn't buy it two times in a row.
Chrissy: Why didn't you tell mommy that daddy didn't really want to go?
Ben: Well, because they think I'm going over to Stinky's.
Chrissy: So?
Ben: Well, I'm actually going cruising with Chuck Stake.Tonight he's going to let me ride inside the car.
Chrissy: You told a lie!
Ben: Quiet or I'll melt your Disney tapes.(Talking on the phone) Hello.It's the woman who has to put up with you tonight.
A broken leg?As in you can't come baby-sit?Well, if no bones are poking out, I don't see why not?But you have to!It's a matter of life and death!Ah!
Chrissy: Shh...I'm watching TV.
Ben: Yo, Chuck Stake!You want to come in?
Chrissy: We are watching the Little Mermaid.You looked like a loser.
Dwight: Welcome to the land that time forgot.
Mike: It's an attic.
Carol: Not its not!It's a Mid-evil banquette hall.
Mike: Ah, my mistake.
Kate: Carol everything looks beautiful.
Dwight: I'll go fetch our sumptuous repasts, so we can slay our appetites and slake our thirsts.
Carol: That means you get to eat and drink.Do you need some help my dearest darling?
Dwight: Oh, no thank you my luscious lamb-chop.
Carol: Are you sure my stalwart stevedore?
Dwight: Quite, my whimsical wench.
Mike: Get the food!
Kate: Carol, your dress is beautiful.
Carol: Thank you, Dwight made it.Yes, he sews.
Mike: Dwight, how did you open that door?
Dwight: Oh, it's simple.I rigged it to electric pressure mats on both sides, so the door opens and closes on its own.
Mike: Where did you get that idea, the lost note books of Leonardo da Vinci?
Dwight: No, the door of the Piggly-Wiggly.
Jason: (thinking to himself) I could increase clinic manpower.Will you knock it off; you suppose to be enjoying a night out with your wife.
Oh, look at her, having the time of her life.
Maggie: (thinking to herself) I'd give you cash to turn this car around.Stop it; you know how much he wants to go out tonight.
Jason: I'd rather put thumb tacks in my shorts.I should tell her.
Maggie: I've got so much to do at home; I've got to tell him.Jason....
Jason: Sweetheart I've...You go first.
Maggie: Honey, how do you feel about going out tonight?
Jason: Oh, jazzed and tingly.You?
Maggie: Oh, in the ballpark of jazzed.Just a side of tingly.
Jason: What, more like, uhhh...
Maggie: I'd rather have thumb tacks in my shorts.
Jason: Me too.
Maggie: Honey, I'm so sorry...you'd rather have thumb tacks too?
Jason: Yeah, I don't want to go out tonight.You want to go home?
Maggie: Oh you bet.Oh honey, isn't this the silliest thing we have ever done?
Jason: Well we did have a slight miscommunication, based on our great love for one another.
Here we can stop next ramp straight home make the most what is left this evening.
Maggie: Ok, but why are we slowing down?
Kate: This turnip soup is...umm...it's interesting.
Mike: Ninety-nine percent flavor free.
Carol: You have absolutely no since of adventure.
Mike: Hey, I'm here aren't I?
Kate: So, uh, Dwight what else are we having?
Dwight: Thought you'd never ask.Voila.
Kate: Meat?
Carol: Dwight, I thought I told you, Kate doesn't eat anything with a face.
Dwight: I cut it off.
Mike: Well, just out of curiosity Dwight, what was it when it had a face?
Dwight: Just your plain, garden variety muskrat.
Mike: Muskrat?Dwight, where did you get a muskrat?Did some guy in an alley come up to you, open his coat, and it was just hanging there?
Dwight: You know Merve?
Mike: Carol, you've had some weird boyfriends before but this time you got the door prize.
Carol: Ok Mike, that it, apologize to Dwight or I am never talking to you again?
Mike: Great!Two birds with one stone.
Dwight: You've had other boyfriends?
Carol: Ah, I should have known.I mean there is no way for us to be friends.
We are like oil and water, smart and stupid, and Dwight I told you Kate was a vegetarian.
Kate: Carol, he meant well.
Dwight: Hey, I can handle my own woman.
Kate: Your own woman?Carol, is that the kind of relationship you two have?
Carol: You're talking to me about relationships and you're with that?
Mike: Oh, hey, let's face facts here.There are four people in this room; two of them are wearing tights, and it isn't us.
Kate, come on get your stuff, we are out of here.
Kate: Dwight we had a lovely time.
Mike: No, no, no.Kate you don't have to be polite unless you want to be invited back.
Dwight: Hey!
Ben: Hey!
Chrissy: Hey!What happened?
Ben: The lights went off.
Ben: Chrissy I can't, I think the power is off.
Chrissy: I don't like the dark.
Chrissy: Ok.
Chrissy: What did you do?
Ben: Nothing!It's a power failure, why are you blaming me?
Chrissy: This never happens when mommy or daddy are home.
Ben: Look, you stay right here, I know where a flashlight is.Mom keeps it up here next to the uh....Christmas ornaments.Great, it still works.
Chrissy: That's not a real light.Put the lamp back on.
Ben: Chrissy, I can't there is no electricity.
Chrissy: Oh, so let's watch television tell it comes back on.
Chrissy: Wait a minute, I can't watch T.V.but you can listen to the radio?
Ben: Chrissy!We are going to play a little game called "shut up".You go first.
Radio announcer: The storm has downed a number of power lines causing blackouts over most of long island.
Radio announcer: Local predicts that the blackout will last another eight to twelve hours.
Mike: A blackout, great!Dwight, open the door.
Dwight: Woops!
Mike: I don't want to hear woops from this guy.
Mike: Cut to the chase.
Dwight: We are trapped like rats.
Mike: All right.Kate, watch you, I am going to break a window.
Kate: Mike!
Carol: Wait, wait, wait!There is an icy wind out there and the heat is off.You are not breaking anything.
Mike: Look Carol, all I have to do is throw something down to the street with a note attached explaining our situation.
Now, uh, what's the most worthless thing we've got up here?
Carol: You leave my Dwight alone.
Kate: It's getting cold.
Dwight: Never thought I'd die by freezing.I always thought it would be a shower mishap.
Mike: Come on, we are not going to freeze.There are plenty of ways to keep warm.Like, uh...
Dwight: We could eat.
Carol/Mike/Kate: Pass
Dwight: I was talking about dessert.
Mike: Oh, don't tell me.Merve sold you a goose for a goose berry pie?
Dwight: No, waffle sweet-cake.
Dwight: None.Just a hogs heard of "wassa wine".
Jason: Move it goober.
Maggie: Feel better?
Jason: I did until I realized that is a police car in front of us.
Police man: Excuse me sir, but did you just call me goober?
Jason: That was trooper, trooper.Thanks for asking.Good night.
Police man: We've got some downed power lines up ahead.Most of the island is blacked out.Keep your pants on.
Maggie: A black out, Jason the children!
Maggie: Oh great!Of all the nights to be taken away from home.
Jason: What's that suppose to mean.What like this is my fault?Maggie, three months ago tonight was just a date on the calendar.
We mutually circled it for some quality time together.
Maggie: Oh, is that all this is to you?
Jason: The point is...
Maggie: What is this, some kind of clinical exercise?Ok Jason, what else was on your agenda?
Jason: Sweetheart, look I'm sorry.I did want to be with you tonight.I wanted to spend...wait a minute, you didn't want to be here either!!
Maggie: No Jason, I didn't say I didn't want...
Jason: I have absolutely nothing to apologize for, Miss not tonight dear I have a deadline.
Maggie: Well, if that's the way you feel about it.
Jason: Where are you going?
Maggie: I am walking home.At least there people want to talk to me.
Jason: Ah!
Maggie: There is an icy wind and I am wearing thin shoes.
Carol: Well Mike, guess Miss Manners couldn't hold her cake.
Mike: Dwight, exactly how much wine is in a hogs head?
Dwight: About sixty-three gallons.
Mike: Sixty-three gallons?
Dwight: Most of it cooks off.
Mike: I don't believe this!First you get us trapped in the dark, then you try to feed us road kill, you get my girl plastered.
Dwight: Hey, in LA people pay big buck for a party like that.
Mike: Yeah well this isn't LA.We are getting colder by the minute.How are you going to get us out of this mess curly, toes?
Dwight: Well, we can drape every walls, windows, keep out cold.
Mike: Alright, where can we get drapes around here.
Carol: Yes, he does drapes too.
Chrissy: I feel like the Stay Puff Marshmallow Man.Why can't we put the heater on?
Ben: What are you complaining about?Your warm now, aren't you?
Chrissy: Yes.
Ben: Good.
Chrissy: Ben?
Ben: What!?!?
Chrissy: I have to go to the bathroom.
Ben: What?Why didn't you say that six layers ago?
Chrissy: Cause I didn't have to go then.
Ben: Well too bad, you're just going to have to hold it.
Chrissy: Is the bathroom electric too?
Ben: Yes!
Chrissy: This is all your fault Ben Seaver!You broke the lights, now you broke the bathroom; I bet you broke the whole neighborhood.
Ben: That's right Chrissy!I broke everything, its all part of my sick twisted plan.
Guess what, I saved the best for last.We are going to die, it's freezing outside and the smallest goes first.
Chrissy: (cries)
Ben: Aw...come on Chrissy, I'm just kidding.Everything is going to be fine.
Chrissy: It is not.You said the smallest goes first, and I'm the smallest.
Ben: Look Chrissy don't cry.Ok, you want me to make a "googy" face?
Chrissy: You always have a "googy" face.
Ben: Ok, I'll tell you a story?How about the Three Little Pigs?
Chrissy: There is a wolf in that one.
Ben: Umm...how about Little Red Riding Hood?
Chrissy: There is a wolf in that one too.
Ben: Ginger Bread Man?
Chrissy: Wolf.
Ben: Chrissy, isn't there anything I can do to make you feel better?
Chrissy: You can take me to the bathroom.
Ben: You got it.Walk this way.Stick with me cutie-pie; I'll take good care of you.
Jason: Five hours stuck in a car that is some romantic evening.What?
Maggie: You just described our first date.
Jason: Oh.
Maggie: What?
Jason: Yeah, I remember how hard I had to work to get you alone on that first car of mine.
Maggie: Well I still remember what you said."Hey Malone, want to see my fuzzy dice?"
Jason: Don't laugh, it worked.I'm sorry about earlier.
Maggie: Yeah, me too.So what kind of evening did I miss?
Jason: Front row seats at Miss Saigon, a window table at the rainbow room,
and a buggy ride through central park with what horse in the little flowered hat that you love so much.
Maggie: Ah, Jason, you really did want to make this a special night.
Jason: Yeah, I love you Maggie.Lately I miss you.
Maggie: I miss you too.
Maggie: I am coming back up front.
Jason: No, no.I got a better idea...yee haa.
Maggie: Jason, you and I in the back seat of a car, I half expect my father to shine his flashlight on us.
Jason: Yeah
Police Man: Roads clearing up, you kids beat it or I will have your parents meet us at the station.
Maggie: Oh, Jason, I'm sorry you missed Miss Saigon.
Dwight: Hey, you know, I think this drape thing just might do it.
Mike: Your man's a walking punch line.
Carol: Mike, why do you pick on Dwight so much?
Mike: Oh gee Carol, I don't know.Maybe it's because he talks like a geek, he walks like a monkey, and he dresses like chimp.
In fact, I think he is the fourth stooge.
Carol: Look Mike, I'm the first to admit that Dwight's a little....
Mike: Squirrelly?
Carol: Different.
Mike: Well you got that right.
Carol: Well let's face it; Polly-Anna over there wouldn't win the Miss Normal of the universe contest.
Mike: What's that suppose to mean?
Carol: Mike, she grazes.
Mike: Carol, the point is, Kate loves me and I love her.And for you information I think that grazing thing is kind of cute.
Carol: The way you feel about Kate, that's how I feel about Dwight.
Well, it's just that Dwight is the first guy I've met who, who appreciates and understands me for who I really am.
He is my significant other, so get use to it.
Mike: Could take a little while.
Kate: Hey everybody.
Mike: Hey sleepy head!
Kate: Why is it so warm in here, what happened?
Mike: Oh, well uh, curly toes...I mean Dwight, saved us with his drape idea.He can actually be pretty smart sometimes.
Dwight: Couldn't have done it without you Mike.
Kate: I wonder how long tell the power comes on.
Carol: Dwight, why don't you play some music for us to help us pass the time?Yes, he sings too.
(sing) Dwight: You just, you just call out my name and you know wherever I am, That I'll come running, to see you again.
Winter, Spring, Summer, or Fall, all you got to do is call and I'll be there.I will.You got a friend.
Mike: Oh my gosh.
Carol: The black out's over.Yeah!Come here.
Kate: Well I guess we can go home now.
Carol: Yeah, sure can.But I was kind of enjoying that song though.
Dwight: Yeah, me too.
Mike: Well hey, we can finish it.
Mike, Dwight, Carol, Kate: You just, you just call out my name and you know wherever I am, I'll come running.To see you again.
Ben: Chrissy, hi, the black out's over.Want me to put you to bed?
Chrissy: No, I like it here with you. /*本字幕取自里仁互动学习软件*/ /*请勿用于商业用途*/ /*程序编制：thanks QQ：52047423*/